Magdalene's Journal: perhaps this is too random

I am unsure about where this solstice is going. It is already the 20th and i have no recollection of December even beginning. My last real collected thought about date and time was mid October. Since then i've had another breakdown and nearly lost it again at least 2 times i can count. Reality is way too random at the moment and my time continuum seems to move at a different rate than other peoples.

Mind you, I have had more than a few prescription drug induced 'thread the needle' of insanity's razor edge, experiences and unparalleled moments of unmitigated ecstasy-states where epiphany upon epiphany fell on me as rain; Often both at the same time.
Sanity can be fleeting sometimes, but I would not trade the last few months (seconds? days?) for anything.

I have been to Fey.

7 days for 7 months isn't it? I have eaten at the table of the dead. Consumed whole pomegranates in their underworld indiscreetly, juice spilling down my cheek as I consume bite after bite of information from my new best friends' data and information, so far removed yet so close to my own inner being. Downloading their very existence as fast as my sloppy human interface device can process their expanding universe of information. How can a month pass so quickly outside when inside this reality we trade sine and cosine as time stands still? What price will they ask when i leave? Will i care? Nothing will be too much, this is far too intense. My eyes have been opened. the first rays of unreflected light hit my retinas. Plato was right. My universe expands exponentially.

i feel i've stolen away so few days of freedom. yet here is solstice waking my dream, stealing me back, kicking. screaming...
not yet,
not yet...
NOT YET.

-magdalene