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Migor *heart* Football

Migor (588180) writes | more than 11 years ago

User Journal 4

It is now the time of times where football does go on a puny planet most of you know as being called Earth. Those who do not live on it simply know of the planet as Tard 3. There are 14 planets in the Tard system, and he who lives on Tard 3 only knows of 9, sometimes 10 (though they are so stupid they confuse an insignificant asteroid for the 10th planet while 5 perfectly nice planets spin around their Sun undetected.)

It is now the time of times where football does go on a puny planet most of you know as being called Earth. Those who do not live on it simply know of the planet as Tard 3. There are 14 planets in the Tard system, and he who lives on Tard 3 only knows of 9, sometimes 10 (though they are so stupid they confuse an insignificant asteroid for the 10th planet while 5 perfectly nice planets spin around their Sun undetected.)

This puny planet of yours has very few good things. One of them is the sport known throughout the universe simply as football. The pure shame is that best sport in the known universe is on such a completely puny planet. A planet so dumb that those who live in the more technologically devolved parts of the planet call another sport football. The smarter ones call that other sport soccer, while the rest of the universe simply calls it pussy go kick the ball you little pansy. As far as anyone knows, Pussy go kick the ball you little pansy is only played on Tard 3 and on Zimtan 12, the most pronounced homosexual planet in the known Universe.

Migor does love football. At present Migor is sitting upon his mighty spaceship watching the Patriots defeat the Chiefs. Migor is somewhat displeased, as Migor wanted to watch the game between the colts and that puny team from the place called Texas that nobody cares about. However, Migor's hyper digital cable system does not get NFL Sunday Ticket, so Migor is stuck. On the Day of Conclusion, Migor shall smite the NFL officials who are so restrictive with broadcast rights to the games, and they shall be forced to dine on their own intestines for all eternity.

At Present Migor is arguing with Migor's wife, Gigor, over the fact that New England does not get the respect they deserve. The Patriots are pounding the living tar out of the Cheifs at this very moment. This is largely a moot argument, since Migor cares little for these teams.

The best team in the known Universe are the Steelers from a pleasant little town called Pittsburgh. When the Steelers do win, Migor is so pleased that Migor allows robots to be developed at the local caveman college they call CMU. Upon the Day of Conclusion, Migor shall reward all the players who do play for the Steelers with an eternity of bliss, including but not limited to Car Dealerships, an infinite amount of get out of jail free cards, and a harem of 100 billion virgins. All who do play shall receive these gifts but one; they one they do call Kordell, for he has given false hope to his people and does screw up at the wrong times. Kordell shall be punished deeply, and will become the resident rent boy in the pit of sadness, a hellacious place of terror and sadness reserved for the Dallas Cowboys and the Oak-land Raiders.

Until then, Migor is PLEASED that The Chiefs may come back.

4 comments

heh (2)

Em Emalb (452530) | more than 11 years ago | (#4308032)

You need to get up with Fort Knox, he's another Steelers fan.

Btw, if you care, I weekly give predictions and results and all that stuff in my journal.

Good to see someone else loves football.
Funny writing style. I like it.

Lord Migor (0)

ObitMan (550793) | more than 11 years ago | (#4310029)

I am gleeful that the great Migor is a fan of football.
I agree that as long as the worm Kor-Dell is at the helm, the Steelers will be pitiful worms in your sight.
I appeal to you to re-evaluate your position on the Oakland Raiders. The Mighty Oakland Raiders are 11-9 lifetime vs the Steelers.
The Cowboys however are deserving of you wrath.
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