YourMissionForToday's Journal: Dedicated to The_Messenger

YourMissionForToday's note: On this fine Troll Tuesday, I got out of work early and on my drive home, I made up this catchy tune. It's dedicated to The_Messenger, whose unflinching vigilance against the twin demons of Cheap Software and GNU/Communism has been an inspiration to us all. Posts like this remind one that trolling is still, even in these dismal times, the most hilarious and clever activity that goes on at Slashdot.

Now let us raise our voices in song as we dedicate this day to a trolling legend. Mr. The_Messenger, we salute you!

Happy Troll Tuesday!

Posting The First aka YourMissionForToday theme song

To the Tune of Henry The Eighth (Herman's Hermits)

I'm posting the first I am
Posting the first I am I am
I got FP in the story before
I've been modded many times before

And every time by an imbecile (IMBECILE!)
Usin' words like VAXen and GNU (FUCK GNU!)
Cause they hate to stop their circle jerks
To hear me say FUCK YOU! (FUCK GNU!)

Second Verse is Different than the first:

I'm YourMissionForToday I am
Two posts a day is where I stand
Can't leave my wit at a high threshold
Cause I post links to a certain hole

I get modded down due to jealousy (JEALOUSY!)
'Coz they wouldn't know wit from their ass! (FUCK THAT!)
I bathe, I can spell, and I'm employed!
I'm YourMissionForToday I am!

'Tis a work of beauty

[Sheetrock]

I'm quaking from the sheer impact of the prose; nay, not simply the content, but the rhythm -- the finest lyricists known to history have not crafted multisyllabic bliss such as this, which has bitchslapped me as if I was a hooker that just got caught shorting the pimp a couple of bills.

Truly, you have missed your calling... or, perhaps, have just awoken to it.