dh003i's Journal: Christian School Punishes Daughter for "Sins" of Mother

Fact-Summary:

• Christina Silvas sent her 5-year old kindergartener to Capital Christian school for $400/month. After her husband stopped paying his half of the bill, Silvas, a single full-time mother, was in a desperate financial situation: She did not have enough money to continue paying $400/month without working. If she worked, jobs offered insufficient money and required long hours, keeping her from her daughter. So she became a part-time stripper, alleviating her financial situation, allowing her to send her daughter to Capital Christian, support herself and her child, and be a full-time mother.

  Hearing this and receiving verification, the school notified Ms. Silvas that if she didn't quit stripping her daughter would be suspended. When she refused to quit, the school suspended her daughter and informed Silvas that her and her daughter could neither attend/visit the school or the church. Silvas received several offers of financial aid from outside the church. Silvas felt she had not violated the moral contract she signed when she put her daughter in the school, since she stripped while her daughter was not in her custody, and set an upstanding moral example for her daughter. She also said that God, seeing actions and motivations, knew she was stripping to be the best mother to her daughter.

  Eventually, they worked out a deal: Silvas' daughter could return to school for the remainder of the year, if Silvas temporarily quit her job; the school waived her fee for the last month. Silvas agreed to the terms, noting that she became a stripper for her daughter's benefit, and that she got out of it for the same reasons. Silvas, extremely disappointed by the school's decisions, characterizing their actions as un-christ-like, noting that the financial aid offers came from outside the church. Silvas looked for another church and school for her and her daughter to attend. She later posed in Playboy, securing her immediate financial future.

Notable Quotes by Christina Silvas:

• "My daughter is the one who goes to school there, not me and they're turning her away."

  "I'm not proud of what I'm doing right now. But I'm proud for the reason that I'm doing it, which is to prove the best life for my daughter that I possibly can."

  "My goal throughout all of this has been to do the best for my daughter that I possibly can."

  "Just as I decided to start dancing, I'm now deciding to take this pause for her benefit. I'm not doing this because I support the church's position."

  "I don't think the church's reaction was very Christ-like," Silvas said - noting that the offers of help she received "came from outside the church."

  "Before all of this happened I was extremely interested in posing I have the utmost respect for the entire company, and I believe posing for Playboy is the American dream for a woman."

  "Absolutely." [in reference to having seen fellow Church-members at the strip-club]

  "I think it's demeaning to have a day care raise your child while you're working." [her opinion regarding Pastor Cole's comment that "God thinks stripping is demeaning"]

  "I believe God sees our heart and looks at why we are doing what we are doing as opposed to solely our actions, and I believe that my actions were absolutely honorable. I was trying to provide for my daughter. I didn't have the luxury of looking for something else to do. It was very sudden that the financial responsibility of providing for my daughter fell onto my shoulders, and this was the first opportunity that seemed like it would help me accomplish my goals." [in reference to if she thinks God was satisfied with her sacrafice to strip for her daughter]

  "No." [my daughter will not return to the Capital Christian for first grade] "I was deeply disappointed with their actions throughout this entire situation."

  "It was an extremely positive experience. It helped me accomplish the goals that I think are important, which is spending time with my daughter and providing the best that I can for her." [in reference to whether or not she enjoyed dancing at the club]

Discussion & Conclusion:

• Let me start off by saying that I agree with the comments Ms. Silvas has made: the school and church definately acted un-Christ-like. Would the Christ spoken of in the Bible have punished a child for the actions of his or her mother? No. The Christ spoken of in the Bible would have went to the club and tipped the mother, and talked with her as a friend. Oh wait, the church only reads the parts of the Bible it wants to read. Forget about he who hasn't sinned throwing the first stone; forget about Jesus conversing and being friends with prostitutes, tax-collectors, and thieves. Also forget about Jesus helping those in need (note, the offers of financial support came from outside the church).

  Worse than merely suspending Ms. Silvas' daughter from the school, they also banned her and her mother from going to the church, while she was a stripper. The church is supposed to be open to everybody, epsecially children who are necessarily (due to their age) innocent. What exactly did they expect the girl to do, give her mother a spanking? Bad mommy, bad bad bad -- go to the corner! What this amounts to is punishing the child for what the church calls the sins of the mother, in the name of God. Interesting that the church has a monopoly on speaking for what the will of God is: apparently, commoners like Ms. Silvas and others can't interpret the Bible for themselves.

  It is closed-minded churches which have put shame into the naked body, and indeed shame into eroticism, not the God spoken of in the Bible. Obviosly, God thought that the naked human body was a good and beautiful thing, or else he wouldn't have made man (as well as every other living thing on this earth) naked. There is nothing shameful about the naked body -- it is a thing of beauty. Likewise with eroticism: a thing of beauty. Stripping and other erotic (or pornographic) arts are powerful artistic expressions, designed to arouse various feelings within people: desire, lust, passion, burning, etc. Why should that be looked at as having any less artistic merit than a tragedy, such as Shakespear's King Lear, or a deeply depressing novel, such as Orwell's 1984? An interesting quote that comes to mind: "There's no such thing as good or evil books. There's well-written books and poorly-written books." I believe that is applicable to Ms. Silvas' stripping situation.

  Quite frankly, there's nothing degrading or harmful about Ms. Silvas' actions. She did what she did to be able to spend the most time with her daughter, while financially supporting herself and her daughter (i.e., private school). Indeed, I would argue that what she's doing makes her a great mother: supporting her daughter both emotionally and financially...seems like the real-deal to me.

  And I say that the church should examine their own sins before condemning Ms. Silvas. Ms. Silvas' actions harmed no one, but in fact greatly benefitted her daughter (by allowing Silvas to spend more time with her daughter). The church will argue that her daughter will be hurt later on when she finds out her mother was a stripper, but I say that's non-sense: she will be glad her mother did what it took to support her both financially and emotionally; and, being raised by an enlightened person such as Ms. Silvas, she will not be open-minded. The church is the one at fault here, as their actions clearly harmed a 5-year old girl. And lets not forget about all the child-molesters that the church protects within: the priests who are "relocated" from one parish to another every time they're accused of child-molestation, so they can molest a whole new batch of children. Lets not forget about all the rapists, murderers, and child-molesters that the church holds in confidence, allowing them to get away with their crimes. "Look to the log in your eye before the splinter in your friends'" comes to mind. I'm not questioning the church and school's right to do what they did (they're private organizations, and can handle their affairs as they like); what I am doing, is questioning their decisions, and criticizing them for those decisions: they may have had the right to do what they did, but it was wrong.

  On the bright side, Ms. Silvas and her daughter have moved on. They are too good for that school and church, and Ms. Silvas has found a new church for herself and her daughter, as well as a new school for her daughter. They deserve better. Ms. Silvas has also posed for some beautifully artistic nudes (and an interview) in Playboy, giving her a financial safety-net to fall back on. Good for her!

Articles on Christina Silvas and her daughter:

• Christian School Boots Stripper's Kid
  Girl Expelled Over Stripper Mother
  Kingergartener's Stripper-Mom In Church-School Flap
  Playboy Pictures of Christina Silvas
  Anti-Strip School 'Disappointed' Over Mum's Playboy Pose
  School: Stop Stripping Or Your Daughter's Expelled -- interview iwth Silvas and Cole on CNN
  Stripped Of Her Faith -- Playboy Article on Silvas, include exclusive interview
  The Stripper And The Christian School
  Stripper's Child Expelled From Christian School

Contacts:

• Let them know what you think!

  Click here to send your opinion to the Capital Christian Center, or send an e-mail to [e-mail].

Note: I do not believe in God, Christianity, or any other religion. I think all religions are equally absurd and unlikely, filled with hocus-pocus. This is my honest belief. However, because I greatly respect Christina Silvas for the sacrafices she has made for her daughter -- and because I know she is a Christian -- I have chosen to capitalize the word God in this journal entry. Also note that facts or quotes are in Type, headers in bold, and my personal comments in plain text.