Jeremiah Cornelius's Journal: #HASHTAG!

avinunu Ali Abunimah
As UK looks more like a failed state how should we intervene to secure our interests? Bombing, sanctions or both? #londonriots
8 Aug

avinunu Ali Abunimah
BREAKING: Cameron calls up emergency reserve of Daily Mail readers to active duty. #londonriots
8 Aug

avinunu Ali Abunimah
Since cash-strapped British Army is deployed abroad, obvious solution is to request NATO ally Germany to send Wehrmacht to end #londonriots

avinunu Ali Abunimah
Sorry yes. It is indeed the Bundeswehr now not the Wehrmacht. Send German peacekeepers to streets of London NOW! NATO MUST ACT #londonriots

avinunu Ali Abunimah
Experts say that tribal council "House of Lords" is widely respected on British streets. Only it has authority to bring calm #londonriots
8 Aug
Ali Abunimah
avinunu Ali Abunimah
Why are all these English people objecting to my Tweets? Don't they know I'm an Expert on them? #londonriots
8 Aug
Ali Abunimah
avinunu Ali Abunimah
Experts say UK uprising remains limited but little is known about the insurgents. Rumors and regime claims abound.

avinunu Ali Abunimah
The British are known to be an emotional people prone to overly colorful language. This is why many are upset at my Tweets. #londonriots

avinunu Ali Abunimah
I speak only mangled English but you can count on my expertise. #londonriots

avinunu Ali Abunimah
I bet a lot of people wish the UK had a Labour Party right now. Someone should start one. #londonriots

avinunu Ali Abunimah
Based on history, experts predict Elizabeth will call together leading knights, bishops and vassal lords for Grand Council on #londonriots
9 Aug
Ali Abunimah
avinunu Ali Abunimah
It is, more than likely, experts say, that rioting youths are angry they have not been appointed to the Shura Council of Lords. #londonriots
9 Aug

Ali Abunimah
avinunu Ali Abunimah
Experts say that Elizabeth rules directly in an absolute fashion issuing direct orders through the "Privy Council." #londonriots
9 Aug
Ali Abunimah
avinunu Ali Abunimah
While Elizabeth II is unelected and her views on anything but the weather a complete mystery, experts say she is reform-minded. #londonriots
9 Aug
Ali Abunimah
avinunu Ali Abunimah
Experts say that much-loved reformist monarch Elizabeth II must appeal directly to insurgents and call for national unity. #londonriots
9 Aug

avinunu Ali Abunimah
I CAN'T UNDERSTAND #LONDONRIOTS UNTIL SOMEONE PHOTOGRAPHS THEM IN HIPSTAMATIC.

avinunu Ali Abunimah
Perhaps Met can bring in some Orange Men to march down and open up some closed roads in London? Always works in Belfast! #londonriots

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Oh my

[peacefinder]

That's beautiful.