The WIPO Troll's Journal: I Like to Fuck my Little Sister! And Other Shit (1.5)

I LIKE TO FUCK MY LITTLE SISTER! (AND OTHER SHIT)

By J. Wipo Troll, Esq., $Revision: 1.5 $

Whats black, blue and green and doesnt like sex?

The Girl Scout locked in my basement.

Whats the worst part about having sex with a six year-old?

Getting the blood out of your clown suit.

Whats the best thing about getting a hand job from a five year-old?

That little hand makes your thing look really huge.

Guy comes home from work to find his girlfriend sitting on the porch, crying.

Whats wrong, honey?

Im leaving you! I just found out youre a pædophile!

Pædophile? Why, thats a pretty big word for a ten year-old.

How can you tell when your sisters on her period?

When your dads dick tastes like blood!

Two pædophiles are lying on a beach tanning, one turns to the other and says, Excuse me, youre in my son.

What is the sickest sound you hear when fucking a nine year-old?

Her hips snapping!

What is the best sound you hear when fucking a 13 year-old?

Her hips snapping!

Whats 18 inches long, blue, veiny, and makes a woman cry?

Crib death.

How could the mans seven year-old son tell that his dad had fucked his eight year-old sister? His dads weiner tasted like blood!

Watson returns home to find Holmes in bed with a child. He shouts, Is this some sort of a schoolgirl?

Holmes replies, Elementary, my dear Watson.

So I was having sex with my girlfriend, and I decided I wanted to get kinky and try and do her in the ass. So I slipped around back; she looked over her shoulder at me and said, My, how presumptuous of you. I said, Presumptuous? Thats a big word for a ten year-old.

Two guys are walking down the street when a beautiful woman passes. The first guy says, Damn! Id love to tear her clothes off, do her in the rear, smear my fæces all over her, slice off her breasts, chop her into little pieces, put her in a garbage bag and toss her into the river!

Second guy says, Yuck! Youre a sick bastard!

First guy says, Whatre you? A fag?

A kindergarten teacher is asking the kids what their father does for a living. All the kids answer except for Little Johnny. The teacher asks Little Johnny what his Dad does and Johnny replies, My dad is dead.

The teacher says, Thats terribile, but what did he do before he died?

Little Johnny replies, He turned blue and shit all over himself!

A guy calls in sick to work.

Whats wrong? asks the boss.

Im sick, the guy replies.

You sound all right.

No, Im really sick. Believe me.

Listen, you were fine yesterday, and we have a lot of work today. I want you in here. You cant be that sick!

Dude, I just banged my sister. Dont tell me Im not sick.

A little girl accompanied her father to the barbershop. While her dad received a haircut, the little girl stood next to the barber chair, enjoying a snack cake. The barber smiled at her and said, Sweetheart, youre going to get hair on your Twinkie.

I know, the little girl replied. Im gonna get tits, too.

An older man and a small boy walk hand in hand through the woods.

Boy: These woods sure are spooky!

Man: You think youre scared, Ive gotta walk out of here alone.

Whats the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson?

One walked on the moon, and the other rapes little boys.

Has anyone read Michael Jacksons new book, The Ins and Outs of Child Rearing?

Q: Whats the difference between a dead baby and a golden delicious apple?

A: I dont cum all over the golden delicious apple before I take a bite out of it.

Q: Whats the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend?

A: I dont kiss my girlfriend after sex.

Q: Whats the difference between a dead baby and a table?

A: You cant fuck a table.

Q: Whats special about a dead baby over all other forms of life?

A: You can achieve deep throat from whichever way you enter.

Q: What do you have when you have four dead babies, take away two, and add five more?

A: An orgy!

Q: Whats better than three 14 year-olds?

A: 14 three year-olds.

Q: Whats white and bobs up and down in a babys crib?

A: A pædophiles ass.

Q: Whats the safest way to play with a baby?

A: With a condom.

Q: Whats more fun than feeling up a dead baby?

A: Feeling up a dead baby with three nipples.

Q: What does a baby and a Pinto have in common?

A: Theyre fun to ride until they die.

Q: What do you get whan you dislocate a dead babys jaw?

A: Deep throat.

Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a grandmother?

A: Grandmothers dont die when you fuck them in the ass.

Q: Whats the best sound in the world?

A: Hearing dead babys hips crack under pressure!

Q: Whats worse than a having sex with a dead baby?

A: Having sex with a dead baby filled with razor blades.

Q: How do you stop a baby from choking?

A: Take your dick out of its mouth.

Q: Whats worse than finding a dead baby on your pillow in the morning?

A: Realizing you were drunk and made love to it the night before.

Q: How do you make a baby cry twice?

A: Wipe your bloody cock on his teddy bear.

Whats better than sex with a twelve year-old boy?

Absolutely nothing.

[Thanks to Fark.com for all of these wonderfully sick jokes! I couldnt have done it without you! And thanks to all the Anonymous Cowards who have flamed me, I have three words for you! YHBT! YHL! HAND! Apparently this post is extremely good at getting biters. According to an anonymous coward, Attorney General Ashcroft is also after little old WIPO Troll now, in addition to the Canadian cops-on-a-horse that another A.C. sent after me a couple days earlier. Well, this should be fun. Keep up the biting, Slashdotters! ed.]

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Copyright © 2001 J. Wipo Troll, Esq. Verbatim crapflooding of this document is permitted in any medium, provided this copyright notice is preserved, and next time you take a dump, you think of the WIPO Troll and all hes done to make Slashdot a better place.