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Journal $$$$$exyGal's Journal: A serious topic: Why men masturbate. 54

Journal by $$$$$exyGal
Ok, so I came across this article on Yahoo News, and the obvious conclusion hit me right in the eye. Evolutionarily speaking, men who masturbate have an advantage over men who do not masturbate. The article does not suggest my conclusion, but it seems obvious from the facts given. Here are some facts/quotes given in the article:
  • Men with low sperm counts can significantly reduce sperm quality by holding back for longer than a day or two.
  • In men with low sperm counts, the researchers found the volume of semen increased after prolonged abstinence, but the quality got gradually worse the longer the men held back.
  • "What you really want to do is flush the system out so that the sperm that are there are fresh."

From which I conclude: Men who masturbate daily will be more fertile than men who do not have any type of daily release. Your male ancestors were likely chronic masturbators.

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A serious topic: Why men masturbate. More

A serious topic: Why men masturbate.

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  • Your ancestors are wankers! (Score:1, Funny)

    by Anonymous Coward
    A simpler explanation:

    An orgasm gives male/female a pleasurable experience. Orgasm is brought about by chemicals.
    People masturbate because in essence they are addicted to the chemicals and/or the feeling of pleasure.

    So not only were your ancestors a bunch of wankers, they were also drug-addicts.
    • People masturbate because in essence they are addicted to the chemicals and/or the feeling of pleasure.

      Yes, that is why you masturbate. But why is it so pleasurable? And how did it get that way? Imagine two groups of men 100,000 years ago:

      1. Men who did not get a pleasurable feeling from masturbating.
      2. Men who did get a pleasurable feeling from masturbating.

      The first group of men did not masturbate daily, because it didn't feel good. As a result, their sperm were not as fertile when they did hav

      • <<discards anonymous coward disguise>>

        Alternatively...
        (Or the shame thing, phrased differently)

        A long long time ago....

        there were men/women who did not enjoy sex. They were unaffected by the chemical or physical 'high'.
        Because there was no 'reward' for sex, there was no drive...no urge...no need to find a mate and reproduce.
        Also, no need to masturbate.

        Hence, those that did not enjoy sex died out. Evolution. Smiple. The others...welll, we know the result, they all lived happily ever after and
      • $$$$exy --

        Hi there. You don't know me, but you just earned another new friend. Congrats on getting out of the pr0n linx biz and into some serious discussion about stuff that MATTERS!!

        I don't have an answer about how masturbation got to feeling so good -- I think that the sex felt good (to interest us in procreation) and then some genius found out that s/he could do it to him/herself, and [hu]mankind has never been the same since.

        But here's my theory about why men are (ostensibly -- YMMV, to use a gmho
        • Comment removed based on user account deletion
        • I've noticed that there are definately periods when I as a male do demonstrate an increase in sexual urge caused by unknown circumstance. Yes, of course I do get the time-to-time urges, but I find that usually at the end of a 1-2 month period (usually 2) there are times when sex becomes not only an urge, but one that supercedes the looks and other "attractive" aspects related to the opposite sex.
          As a guy with a lot of female friends, this can be embarrassing - though obviously not uncontrollable (or I'd ha
  • Where's the pr0n :-)?

    But seriously, does that mean that I can deduct my membership to netvideogirls or whatever for health reasons? Or better yet, charge it to my health insurance because it's, uhh, physical therapy?

    I'm gonna go get more fertile right now. . .
    • Ahhh, that's better.

      But I think my sperm is getting a little stale. . .again.

      Time to go flush the system
    • > I can deduct my membership to netvideogirls or whatever for health reasons? Or better yet, charge it to my health insurance because it's, uhh, physical therapy?

      That sounds very interesting; I never thought about that way. You know, every now and then, you find an absurd case in paper like people suing MacDonald for being fat, unhealthy and diabetes. Maybe you should try that, you know? Who knows? You may get tax deduction like you said; I don't want to think about how you are going to prove how CO
  • It's fun... Well *that* and it's the next best thing if you don't get any. Which is unfortunately my case. :-(((

    And yes, I knew about these points. I have read them some while ago in some scientific magazine, if I recall correctly. I must be extremely fertile because usually it's twice a day. Nothing compares to a good wank in the morning ;-P

  • Why do women masturbate? Why do you masturbate?
  • ...that explains why *people* masturbate. As if anyone believes it's just us men?

    People who like sex were (and still are) more likely to have lots of children. Therefore, the urge to have lots of sex is perpetuated through natural selection, and the lack of sex drive is filtered out. Naturally, people who like sex more also masturbate more. So, *our* ancesters were a bunch of sluts.

    Ooo, and look, my theory is less sexist!

    • People who like sex were (and still are) more likely to have lots of children ... people who like sex more also masturbate more.

      The only problems are when people prefer the masturbation over the sex, or when people lose the incentive to mingle with the opposite gender since they are already satisfied, or when people are gay.

  • The article also says this little tidbit:
    "In normal men, the study found no change in sperm motility. The percentage of malformed sperm increased only after 11 days, and then only so marginally that it is unclear whether it could affect fertility."
    So, normal men weren't chronic masturbaters after all? It was just the guys who wore their loin cloths too tight, with the low sperm counts.
  • But what about men who never masturbate? We can never know how low the sperm quality can get. Doesn't this bother anyone? Okay, I'm not going to stay up late at night pondering this (that's for other things ;), but still...
    • For some reason, I just don't think that there are men that don't masturbate. I have never ever met one that didn't admit it after a few beers. Oh, the really shy ones will say that "it's not regular", but I don't believe that.

      As far as women are concerned: I'm pretty sure there are chronical masturbators amongst them too. I don't believe any woman that says she never masturbated (So far, all girls I have talked to about this subject have admitted, I'm pretty good at getting people to confess in me *

      • I believe that some men in some other cultures don't masturbate. I've heard of couples going to therapists in particularly repressed cultures so that they could ASK HOW TO MAKE BABIES.
      • (So far, all girls I have talked to about this subject have admitted, I'm pretty good at getting people to confess in me *grin*)..

        Give me a break, you arragant clod...
        I promise you that you could have not said that 20 years ago. Now a days, both men and women are more prone to be "open" about the subject, sex in general.
        • Well, it really depends on the person. My experience is: be open yourself and people will be open to you. Of course, you have to set the first step.

          Thanks for the compliment... I like being seen as arrogant.

          • Thanks for the compliment... I like being seen as arrogant.

            You are most welcome...BUT I think I would rather be seen as "confident" and *not* arragant.

            --arrogant : exaggerating or disposed to exaggerate one's own worth or importance in an overbearing manner
            --confident : characterized by assurance; full of conviction : CERTAIN

            Major difference. *grins*
            • Oh, it doesn't really matter in the end... as long as I get the raunchy stories of the ladies, I won't complain.

              The bad part is that it makes you "best friend", which is usually not bound to get laid by them :-(((

              • LMAO...you're too funny...
                Hating to admit this but I actually like you.
                • Hating to admit this but I actually like you.

                  I just hope this doesn't involve any homoerotic fantasies ;-)

                  • Hmmm....Would be fun to have you ponder that I was of the same sex and lead you to believe I was a stalker at that...LOL
                    but I'm not that mean.
                    Nice to know you took all the crap I flung your way, in stride. :oP
                    Have a great day, what's left of it! *smiles*
                    • Would be fun to have you ponder that I was of the same sex and lead you to believe I was a stalker at that..

                      I never ponder about such things. All people on slashdot are automatically assumed to be males at first contact. Especially very newly created accounts ;-) Besides, it has no worth in stalking me. Finding out who I am, is about as easy as googling around a bit.

                      Nice to know you took all the crap I flung your way, in stride.

                      As a slashdot "veteran", I can assure you that slashdot is all abo

                    • I never ponder about such things.

                      Obviously you do...shall I quote you?

                      I just hope this doesn't involve any homoerotic fantasies ;-)

                      I see you're still being an arrogant clod!
                      Enough said. ;-)
                    • That was a (apparently failed) humorous attempt to counter your "Hating to admit this but I actually like you". I even quoted it to make sure there was no confusion possible. Also notice the winking smilie...

                      So in essence you just like arrogant clods, eh? ;-)

                    • So in essence you just like arrogant clods, eh? ;-)

                      I guess you can assume that beings that my "very" - significant other is very much of one. *winks*
                      He never gives me a break (arrogantly, he loves admitting that). Even though he can get under my skin by being too arrogant at times, it's always a great challenge in conversation with him, not to mention, freshing! But for the most part, he's extraordinarily self-confident. That's something I cherish in our day to day life.
                      Meanwhile...back at the ranch.

      • About the best quote I've heard along these lines was from Dr. Joycelyn Elders (Clinton's Surgeon General) at this year's Phi Theta Kappa conference [ptk.org]:

        "90% of all men, and 60% of all women masterbate. The rest are lying."

      • I have a friend that didn't, but that was purely on the principle that he "liked to be different" and that pretty much was something that most all other guys did.

        Pretty different yup, but probably overly frustrating at times.

        Now what I'm waiting for on here, is for somebody to explain the causation for fetishes.
    • Well, just as soon as we find him, we'll be sure to take a sperm count.
  • but there was another study (somewhere, out there, on the internet) that claimed that men with advanced degrees and white men were more prone to masturbating.

    I guess all those sickly white PhD's gotta drop a nut somehow!

    P.S.- this increased sperm motility thing doesn't explain jack. I'm down with the more ID-based, darwinian explanation- it feels good, so you do it.

    So, why did I leave the house today? ;)
  • 1)

    From which I conclude: Men who masturbate daily will be more fertile than men who do not have any type of daily release. Your male ancestors were likely chronic masturbators.

    I can think of other evidence that my male ancestors were likely chronic masturbators. But sure. (Daily? Who only orgasms daily? I feel so sorry for you people.)

    2)

    This doesn't address women's evolutionary reasons for masturbating. Whatever it is may also exist in men. :., this fertility issue may not be the only reason that men
  • like son.

    Not much else to say on the topic, I just felt like poking fun at myself. :)

  • Your male ancestors were likely chronic masturbators.
    That's a very polite way of saying my Dad's a wanker.
  • and that is Hormonal Balance. I've known far too many men who've used wanking as a form of 'stress relief'. I can only assume that the reason for this is because when your sperm reaches a critical point, your brain chemistry becomes ever-so-slightly imbalanced and wanking restores it.

    This would aid [very minimally, I might add] in survival by a)allowing clearer thinking b)'rewarding' problem solving skills.

    Disclaimer, I'm only on my 2nd cup of coffee, so undoubtably this could probably be more clearly sta
  • "I'm Britain's champion wanker
    Renowned throughout the land,
    Everybody knows my name but
    Nobody wants to shake my hand."

    Ivor Biggun, the Wankers Song [virgin.net]

    An anthem of my teenage years.

    The chorus - "I'm a wanker, I'm a wanker, and it does me good like it bloody well should - I'm a wanker, I'm a wanker, and I'm always pulling my pud." was a regular refrain on a Saturday night after a gallon or more of ale and a wretched fumble in the Roxy in Manchester.

    Oh, for the 1970s. ;-/>

  • Well, I read a study that indicated that in London, where you have a high level of women who have reasonable jobs, and a level of independence, were as likely to go out and have a night of sex via the way people do during their ovulation, or just before it.

    In addition, they also wore far more revealing clothes during this period, without having an explanation.

    Bottom line. Men are horrrrrrrny most of the time. Women are hornnnnny during some parts of the month, but its not uniform. Everyone is different.

    Y

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