Journal Elbereth's Journal: Happy happy joy joy 1
Holy shit. I think I finally have it all figured out.
My dad has borderline personality disorder, and my mom is a control freak (and maybe has avoidant personality disorder, too). No wonder I turned out bipolar. It all makes so much sense now. All those years of my dad going through maniacal rages for no reason, always being so distant and unemotional, and constantly threatening and insulting me... I never put it all together until now. And my mom supported it all because she saw it as a form of control and order. To someone who obsessively seeks control, fear and violence seem to be legitimate forms of governance -- in this case, raising your children.
Well, the cycle is ending with me, because I have no fucking desire at all to have children. My genes die with me, baby. I'm one of a kind, and there aren't going to be any little knock-offs running around, if I can help it. Kids are a pain in the ass. I like kids just fine. I mean, I like other people's kids just fine. Big distinction there. Let them worry about the teenage pregnancies, college education, doctor and hospital bills, clothes, and peer pressure. I'll just babysit if I ever feel the overwhelming urge to procreate. That should cure me of it rather quickly.
Of course, if I did have chilren, they'd probably be taken away from me. If I had two boys, I'd name them Cain and Abel. Abel would be looking his shoulder for his entire life. Haha. I might even name my kids after superheroes. Imagine calling Batman, Superman, Spiderman (yes, yes, I know it's correctly spelled "Spider-Man", but that ruins the whole naming convention), and Wonder Woman to dinner. That'd be a blast. Or maybe I'd skip the whole Bible/Marvel/DC thing and name them after generic English words, like Book, Table, Song, and Phone. I think Song sounds a little bit female. Book and Table are almost definitely male. I guess Phone could go either way. Well, after I exhausted all those possibilties (or became bored with them... whichever...), I could look to Science for answers. The period table of elements has dozens of great names on it, like Neon, Argon, Plutonium, and Magnesium. Also, I think negative words, such as high crimes, could be fun. How funny would it be to name your kids Treason, Arson, Insomnia, and Nightmare. Insomnia and Nightmare would be especially funny, because the kids would probably never sleep.
By now, most of you are probably praying I never have children. Don't worry. I'm pretty much against it right now. I guess that could change in the next five years, but I don't think so. Life is exciting enough without further overpopulation. Anyways, I can always clone myself.
vhemt (Score:1)