Metrollica's Journal: How do you torture an Open Source Linux Zealot?

I was just wondering how exactly do you go about torturing an Open Source Linux Zealot so I made a short list. Tell me more to add.

Installing a non-free/non-open-source operating system on their computer while they are held down struggling to break free of you and your random taser zaps.

Achieve a high score in KDE's kMines game by editing the prefs file instead of actually playing.

Spraypaint "NOT" beside the already spraypainted words of "Linus is God" on the side of their Mazda pickup.

Convince their mother to switch from Mac OS X to an Aqua themed Windows XP desktop.

Give away all their Think Geek clothing to homeless people who know nothing of computers, let alone open-source software and Linux.

Insert page lengthening characters in all their source code files.

Send important emails to them, but only in the attached proprietary Microsoft Word files loaded with many macros.

Troll Slashdot and create enemies with their 1337 user ID below 1000 account with 50 karma.

or you can..

[banky]

continually point out the failures of the community, how over half (your numbers may vary) are screaming fucktards, how the titular leader (RMS) is a weirdo who hasn't coded anything in a decade, the business models of most companies are just fucked (and those that aren't are hanging on by a thread, and NOT because open source is some magical pill, rather, they have competent management and effective sales and consulting business units). Or my personal favorite: that the entire thing is 5 minutes away from getting co-opted by Microsoft, DRM, and all that jazz.

It's certainly not as much fun as your list.

Re:or you can..

[Metrollica]

That too...