JohnnyComeLately's Journal: Tales from the weary and tired

This is a personal journal entry, so sorry, no geeky, business or valuable info to be found here today.

I'm just so burnt out. It seems like I bust my ass for everyone but me. You could say that I'm burning the candle at both ends and the middle by holding a full time job, owning a tanning salon with my wife, pulling Guard duty, finishing up a Masters in Software Engineering, and trying to be a dad/husband. The thing is, I do these things for others, except for Guard Duty.

Is is wrong to volunteer for a military deployment to "simplify life"?

What do you do when you spend every waking moment trying to make others happy, but you just get more grief the harder you try?

I'm happy with where I am, but I'm told, "You need an engineering degree to get where I want you." OK, so I go to school to get another MS. I don't mind and enjoy learning about software engineering. But then, when I need to do homework, or when chores back up, I'm told I don't contribute?

I'm told "you're a partner" but many suggestions I make for the business is usually met with open hostility?

I used to race my supercharged Trans Am. Now I drive a Hyundai with oversteer so bad I take corners at half the speed and still border on not under control. I have a sportbike but haven't been on a twisty in 4 months. I used to have saltwater tanks, and now all the gear (minus tanks sold long ago at garage sales) sits on shelves in the garage. I enjoy woodworking, but haven't touched the power tools except for 12 hour marathon sessions to renovate the salon (lot less personally satisfying than building nice, Honduran Mohangony cabinets for home).

Mid life crisis? No. I'm not regretting anything or would necessarily do anything differently. Just wish I'd be appreciated...

Thanks for listening....off to do the hour commute home...

Send your partner and kids a link to this JE

[Marxist Hacker 42]

It's entirely possible that they are not aware of the pressures you are under, or that they may well lose you to a military life if it continues.

I'd say send it to your boss as well- but I've found in the past that employers are entirely disinterested in personal life pressures. They expect that because they pay you a salary, your life is theirs.

:( That's too bad

[dexterpexter]

:( Don't know what to say except that I am sorry that things are down right now. I send you my best.

keep plugging away

[Red Warrior]

And only volunteer for deployments to England, Spain, Italy, Japan, etc. The sandbox sucks, and they'll still gripe - this time that you're not there. And you'll be in the sandbox. If you're in Italy, they'll still gripe. But you'll be in Italy....

Step back, take some "Me time". Focus on what sorts of things are important to *you*. Decide what parts of your life work towards those things, and which detract. Take the obvious actions. Maybe you don't need to be active in running the Salon. Maybe it's time to

Re:keep plugging away

[JohnnyComeLately]

They're pretty vague about the destination, so I'm fairly certain it's either The Box or Afghanistan. AF Space Command sends out advisors to help field commanders make tactical decisions (by offering advice on Space Asset availability/capability/etc). I guess they're needing more people as the previous calls were for, "Senior Captains (O-3)". Now, it's "any officer". I'm just feeling a little guilty as I've been active 8 yrs, Guard almost two, and never been close to harm's way. I go onto Camp Pendleto

Re:keep plugging away

[Red Warrior]

Nothing to feel guilty about. Your job is to stand ready, and sally forth when they sound the trumpet. Otherwise, have a tankard of ale and keep your sword sharp.

I forgot you're AF. If they're just talking approx 90 days total (which is about the longevity of most of our AF guys here), you might wanna do it - if just to get the t-shirt...

I keep saying I need to back away from one, but I just get sucked back in.

I hear ya.

Re: Tales from the weary and tired

[allism]

I remember my uncle saying that being stationed in Attu, Alaska for two years at the end of the Cold War was the happiest time of his life - not because he especially enjoyed being separated from his family, but because the only direct pressure being brought on him was through his job.

Is there someone you are close to that you can run your suggestions to your wife by before you bring them up to her? Maybe there is something in your tone or phrasing you're not aware of that is bringing on the hostility (no

Re: Tales from the weary and tired

[JohnnyComeLately]

It's interesting you mentioned Alaska. I was up there for a year and loved the assignment. Although my wife was back in the 48-states cheating on me (her own admission...and no, not current wife) and talking divorce, my friends said you never would have known (because I was happy/laid back). So I thoroughly understand your Uncle's statement. The friends I made back then are still with me today. My sponsor up there (sponser is a military program where someone is there to meet you and help you fit in to t