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Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony Tonight

Hemos posted about 13 years ago | from the looking-at-it dept.

It's funny.  Laugh. 73

Ellen Spertus writes "The Eleventh First Annual Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony will be held in Cambridge, MA, on Thursday, Oct. 4, to honor scientific achievements that cannot, or should not, be reproduced. The ceremony, which will be webcast live and broadcast later on Science Friday, is sponsored by The Annals of Improbable Research. The accompanying Ig Informal Lectures will be held Saturday, Oct. 6, at MIT."

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Rubber CHICKEN!! (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387491)

Rubber CHIckEN!!

jews (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387573)

jews

jews

jews

jews
Your comment violated the postercomment compression filter. Comment aborted

Basic Principles of Staged Radiation Implosion (-1)

Sunken Kursk (518450) | about 13 years ago | (#2387656)

Based on excerpts from Section 2 of Nuclear Weapons Frequently Asked Qustions by Carey Sublette. "Teller-Ulam" Summary

All thermonuclear weapons existing in the world today appear to be based on a scheme usually called the "Teller-Ulam" design (after its inventors Stanislaw Ulan and Edward Teller), or "staged radiation implosion" for a physically descriptive designation. Other designs have been devised that use thermonuclear reactions to enhance weapon yield in various ways, but the term "hydrogen bomb" can be taken to be virtually synonymous with this scheme. Basic Principles of Staged Radiation Implosion

Using the easy to ignite, but very costly, tritium-deuterium fuel it is possible to ignite a reasonably efficient fusion burn in fuel at normal densities using the heat from a fission explosion (50-100 million degrees K). However, it is militarily desirable to use fuels that are cheaper, and more stable than tritium. Deuterium, the sole fuel in reactions 2 and 3 (see Fusion Principles), is relatively cheap (especially considering its enormous energy content) and is completely stable. Pure deuterium has been used in at least one fusion weapon test - Ivy Mike, the first true fusion weapon explosion in history (1 November 1952). Unfortunately since deuterium is hydrogen it is difficult to store. It must either be highly compressed, or liquified at extremely low temperatures. This problem can be overcome by combining the deuterium chemically with lithium to form lithium deuteride, a stable solid. An additional benefit is that through reactions 5 and 6, the lithium can itself participate in the fusion reaction.

To make use of these fuels, the slower reaction rates must be offset by compressing them to densities hundreds or thousands of times greater than those of normal conditions. At any given temperature the reaction rate goes up with the square of the density, a thousand-fold compression gives a million-fold reaction rate increase.

The work required to compress a gas is proportional to its temperature (at these pressures the physical strength of materials is negligible, and everything can be considered a gas). To minimize the work required for compression, or alternatively to achieve maximum compression for a given amount of work, it is important to keep the fusion fuel from getting hot until after the desired density is reached.

The key to making large fusion bombs is finding a way for using the energy of an atomic bomb trigger to compress a mass of deuterium sufficiently for the D-D reactions to become practical, followed by heating of the mass to ignition temperatures after the proper density has been achieved. The technique for doing this is staged radiation implosion, also called the Teller-Ulam configuration after its original joint inventors, Stanislaw Ulam and Edward Teller (also reinvented independently by Andrei Sakharov and his associates, and by others in Britain, France, and China).

The Teller-Ulam configuration makes use of the fact that at the high temperatures of a fission bomb 80% or more of the energy exists as soft X-rays, not kinetic energy. The transport of energy by radiation from the fission core greatly exceeds the core's expansion rate (a mere 1000 km/sec or so). It is possible then to use this energy to compress, and ignite a physically separate mass of fusion fuel (the seond stage) through radiation implosion before the expanding trigger disrupts it.

The principles of the Teller-Ulam configuration are more easily explained with the help of the diagram below. The bomb casing is roughly cylindrical, with the fission Primary (or "trigger") at one end. The fusion fuel (lithium deuteride in the diagram) is a cylinder or ellipsoid wrapped in a pusher/tamper - a layer of very dense material (uranium or tungsten). Running down the axis of the fuel cylinder is a Pu-239 or U-235 rod, 2-3 cm or so in diameter. Lining the casing is a layer of plastic or plastic foam. Separating the trigger from the fuel package is a thick plug of dense material (again U or W).

When the primary explodes, the X-rays escaping from the fission trigger fill the radiation channel, the space between the bomb casing and the fusion capsule, with a photon gas. This space is filled with plastic foam, essentially just carbon and hydrogen, which becomes completely ionized and transparent as the x-rays penetrate. The inner casing and outer capsule surfaces are heated to very high temperatures. The uranium shield between the trigger and the fusion capsule, and capsule pusher/tamper, prevents the fusion fuel from becoming heated prematurely.

Thermal equilibrium is established extremely rapidly, so that the temperature and energy density is uniform throughout the radiation channel. As the surface of the tamper becomes heated, it expands and ablates (blows off the fuel capsule surface). This ablation process, essentially a rocket turned inside out, generates tremendous pressure on the fuel capsule and causes an accelerating implosion. Thermal equilibrium assures that the implosion pressure is very uniformly distributed. The transparent carbon-hydrogen plasma retards the early expansion of the tamper and casing plasmas, keeping the radiation channel from being blocked by these opaque high-Z materials until equilibrium is fully established.

The force that compresses and accelerates the fusion fuel inward is provided solely by the ablation pressure. The other two possible sources of pressure - plasma pressure (pressure generated by the thermal motion of the plasma confined between the casing and the fuel capsule) and radiation pressure (pressure generated by thermal X-ray photons) do not directly influence the process.

The pressure exerted by the plasma causes cylindrical (or spherical) implosion of the fusion capsule, consisting of the pusher/tamper, fuel, and the axial fissionable rod. The capsule is compressed to perhaps 1/30 of its original diameter for cylindrical compression (1/10 for spherical compression), and thus reaches or exceeds 1000 times its original density. It is noteworthy that at this point the explosive force released by the trigger, an amount of energy sufficient to destroy a small city, is being used simply to squeeze several kilograms of fuel!

It is unlikely that the fissionable rod reaches such extreme compression however. Located at the center, it will experience an extremely violent shock wave that will heat it to high temperatures but compress it only modestly, increasing its density by a factor of 4 or so. This is sufficient to make the rod super-critical. Depending on the degree of symmetry, and the physics of the particular capsule collapse process higher densities are possible. Thermalized neutrons trapped in the fusion fuel, which are left over from the intense fission neutron flux, initiate a chain reaction as sson as the rod becomes critical. The rod fissions at an accelerating rate as it, and the rest of the fuel capsule continue to implode and acts as the fusion "spark plug". Combined with the high temperatures generated by the convergent shock wave, this raises the temperature of the fusion fuel around the rod high enough to initiate the fusion reaction. Self-supporting fusion burning then spreads outward. The fusion tamper prevents the escape of thermal radiation from the fuel, enhancing the burn efficiency considerably. The temperatures generated by fusion burning can considerably exceed that produced by fission (up to 300 million K). As the temperature rises, the fusion reactions accelerate.

The fuel in the fission capsule consists of lithium deuteride that may be enriched in the Li-6 isotope (which makes up 7.5% of natural lithium). There is some tritium generated by the fission neutrons, but as noted above the contribution to bomb yield is insignificant. Far more tritium is produced by the D+D reactions, either directly by reaction 3, or by reaction 5 via the neutrons produced in reaction 2.

Since the D+T reaction rate is so high, and there is large excess of deuterium, the tritium is consumed almost as fast it is produced. The 14.1 MeV neutrons also produce large amounts of tritium from Li-7 through reaction 6.

A large part of the fusion fuel can be burned before expansion quenches the reaction by reducing the density, which takes some 20-40 nanoseconds. The power output of a fusion capsule is noteworthy. The largest bomb ever exploded had a yield of 50 Mt, almost all produced by its final fusion stage. Since 50 Mt is 2.1x10^17 joules, the power produced during the burn was around 5.3x10^24 watts. This is more than one percent of the entire power output of the Sun (4.3x10^26 watts)!! The peak output was possibly even greater.

The 2.45 MeV and 14.1 MeV neutrons that escape from the fusion fuel can also contribute greatly to bomb yield by inducing fission in the highly compressed fusion tamper. This extra boost can release most of the explosion energy, and commonly accounts for half of the yield of large fission-fusion-fission bombs and can reach at least 85% of the total yield.

The Teller-Ulam fusion bomb described so far is called a "two stage bomb". The fission trigger (the first stage) compresses the fusion capsule (the second stage). As powerful as the trigger is, there is a limit to how large a capsule it can compress in the brief time available. If a still bigger bomb is desired, then the explosion of the fusion secondary can be used to compress and explode a larger third stage. Each stage can be 10-100 times the size of the previous stage. The 50 Mt bomb mentioned above was a three stage weapon.

that's nice (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387494)

who cares?

Piss Prize? (-1)

FuckTheTaliban (521057) | about 13 years ago | (#2387496)

I think Colon Powell should get the Nobel Piss Prize after we nuke the fucking Taliban back to the Stone Age, and then nuke their corpses all the way down unto their base components.

Fuck creationists.

Re:Piss Prize? (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387504)

# ISLAM #

Forgive this. But I will not forget.

Our dead cry out in tortured horror:
Kill all Muslims.
Kill all Mohammedans.
Kill all Arabs.
Kill all Towel Heads.
Kill all Camel Jockeys.
Kill all Sand Niggers.
Kill all Dune Coons.
Kill all Islam.
Nuke their countries to hell.
Nuke them again.
Death to Islam.

I piss on Mecca. I spit on the Koran. I shit on Mohammed.

I call on the Destruction of Mecca and Medina, the most unholy shit dumps on earth.

You don't have to be a Kreskin to predict Osama bin Laden's future

And to all you Abdul Mohammed Al-Jaraazi Abdullah Mustafuh Atta Quadaphi Fuck-Head Al-Towel-Rag:
Your "God" is our "Satan," have fun burning you scum. You disgusting animals, you will be a fresh farm of much needed organs for people who need livers and hearts, but I personally would rather die than receive a heart or liver from your satanic self.

Hey, Ayatollah towel heads, you will be sent to heaven to meet your maker. (That would be Satan)

I have no ability to stop my hatred towards you Ayatollahs, you better not peep out like a mushroom in a festering swamp lest I shoot your vile head off and harvest your organs for people who need them and cremate your vile self for crop fertilizer.

# ISLAM #

Tales from the Koran: How Mohammed met his end.

We shove Jimmy Dean® Homestyle Pork Sausage up Mohammed's ass.
Then while the Giver strokes me off I shoot my wad in Mohammed's face, after which we force Mohammed to fellate an 800 pound Chester White. Simultaneously, two Hasidic rabbis open their kosher bowels, unleashing torrents of gefilte shit on Mohammed's head and back, while The Giver pumps Mohammed from behind. After the hog shoots its wad in Mohammed's mouth, The Giver shoots his load up Mohammed's rectum. Then, unexpectedly, the Chester White roots out Mohammed's penis and testicles, hungrily biting them off, gobbling them down with full porcine fury. We bury the newly castrated Mohammed up to his nose in pig manure. Two AIDS infected Bowery whores stuff their used condoms and clotted tampax down Mohammed's throat, and crack a bottle of Mad Dog 20/20 over his skull.

We then leave him for the hogs to munch on. Mohammed is swine feed, and by tomorrow, he will be swine manure.

# GOAT KORAN #

For it is written in Mine book that goats are PLEASING and HOLY, in Mine eyes.

I have told the Prophet Mohummad, peace on him!, that he should try a goat, but he is an 'ass-infidel', and persues young moslems.

For this is pleasing in Mine eyes as well! I hearby issue a Fatwah: May the asses of the infidels be reamed by the Prophet, peace on him!, until they look like the goatse.cx man, who is of the devil.
# 99 Morally Bankrupt Fuckwads on the wall #

99 Towel Heads Up On The Wall ...
99 Sheep fucking twits,
You shoot one down,
You kick it around,
98 Rag Heads left on the Wall.

98 Cumlicking Chickenshits on the Wall,
98 Camel sucking penis stuffers,
You shoot one down,
You kick it around,
97 slimy turds left on the wall.

97 Raghead Swine on the wall,
97 Shit Encrusted pukes,
You shoot one down,
You kick it around,
96 moronic flea harbors left on the wall.

Re:Piss Prize? (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387570)

You really should get some help mate.

ig? (-1, Redundant)

philip.duee (451714) | about 13 years ago | (#2387501)

i searched the website, though i do not know: is this just a copy or is this the original nobel prize awardness?

Re:ig? (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387697)

Worst comment ever!!! (in the voice of Comic Book Guy).

isn't that swedish thing. (0, Offtopic)

brujito (301318) | about 13 years ago | (#2387503)

isn't that swedish thing. novel price

Re:isn't that swedish thing. (1)

nextian (458018) | about 13 years ago | (#2389441)

I think this is science humor awards. Why should they use the word Nobel?

Similar prize for software? (3, Interesting)

smaughster (227985) | about 13 years ago | (#2387505)

I think that initiatives like the Darwin award [darwinawards.com] and the Ig Nobel prize [improb.com] are great. Maybe it would be a good idea to introduce such a prize for software that is too faulty or insanely difficult to use, or code that is too unreadable. Ermz, I am preaching for the wrong choir here, since some people actually like making unreadable code [slashdot.org] :)

Re:Similar prize for software? (1)

Suicide (45320) | about 13 years ago | (#2387511)

The only problem I see with that concept is, do you consider software faulty if it has been patched to the point where it is useable?

Re:Similar prize for software? (Most Bugs?) (3, Funny)

vAMP (102914) | about 13 years ago | (#2387532)

But thats not fair!
How can anyone compete with Microsoft???
:)

Re:Similar prize for software? (Most Bugs?) (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387606)

Ahahaha hahahaahah hahaahhaa hahaahahah.

Oh, my you truly are the dear Oscar reincarnated.

Have you considered treading the boards?

Someone has to sweep up at night.

Re:Similar prize for software? (3, Informative)

IncarnationTwo (457191) | about 13 years ago | (#2387537)

If you did read through the pages to the past winners you might have noticed that they have a category of computer science (from year 2000 awards):

COMPUTER SCIENCE Chris Niswander of Tucson, Arizona, for inventing PawSense, software that detects when a cat is walking across your computer keyboard.

Some others of past winners are quite hilarious too. So for the lazy ones: link to past winners is here [improbable.com] [improbable.com].

Re:Similar prize for software? (3, Interesting)

smaughster (227985) | about 13 years ago | (#2387575)

The point of IG Nobel prizes is that it is about (academic) research which has no use. I was thinking more of a prize for stuff that is too hard to use (but could have a use anyway).

Some of the past results would have made great slashdot stories, how about: Charl Fourie and Michelle Wong of Johannesburg, South Africa, for
inventing an automobile burglar alarm consisting of a detection circuit and a flamethrower."

Noise ratio. (3, Interesting)

IncarnationTwo (457191) | about 13 years ago | (#2387595)

The good thing about the internet is that anyone could build up a site with this kind of contest. And the bad side of the internet is that anyone can build up a site with this kind of contest.

Or in other words. I would otherwise greatly encourage, for example you to put ut such a contest, but the fact seems to be (at least to me) that the web is filled with such contests of small communities and groups.

Then again, should you (or anyone) somehow gain a larger community behind such endeavour, and get some outside funding from advertisers or sponsors, then your idea might be worthwhile, or even good. So if you can get these two, and create some working nomination/moderation system for nominees it would sound a great project, but without them you will be having hard time and need lots of will to build such contest. You can note that these fellows have been doing this for a decade now, and had a community at the beginning to start with.

Re:Similar prize for software? (5, Interesting)

mav[LAG] (31387) | about 13 years ago | (#2388613)

Some of the past results would have made great slashdot stories, how about: Charl Fourie and Michelle Wong of Johannesburg, South Africa, for
inventing an automobile burglar alarm consisting of a detection circuit and a flamethrower."


Far from being a whacky burglar alarm, the device you mention was originally actually an anti-hijack device. Johannesburg is the carjacking capital of the world. I have been resident here for over ten years and I can truthfully say that if you yourself haven't been hijacked then a member of your family or a friend has if you live in this town. I personally have had two attacks in my own driveway, my wife was the victim of an attempt and my father was hijacked and then kidnapped for over four hours.

Most carjack attempts happen at traffic lights or outside your home. The robbers' modus operandi is to walk up to your car door brandishing a weapon - normally a 9mm or an AK-47. Sometimes they just shoot first, drag your body out the way and dump it before driving off. It's impractical to reach for a weapon yourself in these situations since a) you're sitting down and b) your seatbelt is often in the way.

Solution: press a button (the original method of activation) and your would-be murderers get themselves horribly crisped by a sheet of burning hydrocarbons. Sounds damn good to me.

Re:Similar prize for software? (1)

hummer (15382) | about 13 years ago | (#2389279)

It has been on slashdot before.

Several years ago now at least.

hummer

Re:Similar prize for software? (3, Interesting)

DoctorNathaniel (459436) | about 13 years ago | (#2387589)

Nah.. wouldn't work. It would be indistiguishable from coroprate self-back-patting.

The thing is, science works by a method of peer review and community respect: your collegues know you do good work because they read it. Software, on the other hand, is not judged at all...

.. except in the Open Source world. Still, I don't think this would work: software either suceeds or fails; the best Open Source stuff simply does it's job well.. it doesn't discover new things.

But all this misses the point. First you need a good name for the prize/magazine. I preferred the 'Journal of Irreproducable Results' to AIR, but that's just me.

Get some PRIORITIES! (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387510)

The worst terrorist attack in recorded history occurred just over three weeks ago, and you people are discussing the fact that the The Eleventh First Annual Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony will be held in Cambridge, MA, on Thursday, Oct. 4, to honor scientific achievements that cannot, or should not, be reproduced???? My *god*, people, GET SOME PRIORITIES!

The bodies of 20,000+ dead people could give a good god damn about your scientific achievments, your childish Lego models, your nerf toys and lack of a "fun" workplace, your Everquest/Diablo/D&D addiction, or any of the other ways you are "getting on with your life".

Re:Get some PRIORITIES! (-1)

count_sporkula (446625) | about 13 years ago | (#2387518)

do you have a script that does this? or are you so fucking anal that you cut and paste it each time a new story appears?

just wondering ....

Re:Get some PRIORITIES! (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387519)

The Eleventh First Annual Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony will be held in Cambridge, MA, on Thursday, Oct. 4, to honor scientific achievements that cannot, or should not, be reproduced, and you're still talking about the worst terrorist attack in recorded history that occurred just over three weeks ago???? GET SOME PRIORITIES!

The scientists winning these prizes could give a damn about what the bodies of 20,000+ dead people think. No wait, actually they couldn't.

Re:Get some PRIORITIES! (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387544)

On 26 January this year, an earthquake hit the province of Gujarat in India, killing nearly 20,000 people. What were you posting to Slashdot then? Did you care? Did you notice? Could you point to Gujarat on a map?


The Mw7.6 Bhuj earthquake that shook the Indian Province of Gujarat on the morning of January 26, 2001 (Republic Day) is one of the two most deadly earthquakes to strike India in its recorded history. One month after the earthquake official Government of India figures place the death toll at 19,727 and the number of injured at 166,000. Indications are that 600,000 people were left homeless, with 348,000 houses destroyed and an additional 844,000 damaged. The Indian State Department estimates that the earthquake affected, directly or indirectly, 15.9 million people out of a total population of 37.8 million. More than 20,000 cattle are reported killed. Government estimates place direct economic losses at $1.3 billion. Other estimates indicate losses may be as high as $5 billion.


Maybe you need to get some priorities.

Re:Get some PRIORITIES! (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387565)

Could you point to Gujarat on a map?

You don't need a map to find Gujarat. You can find it by sense of smell.

Re:Get some PRIORITIES! (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387572)

sorry motherfucker, but that is the difference between america and your country.

we fix our broken shit. you have a monsoon and loose 500,000 people. so what you think, we have 950,000,000 more people left.

fuck you and your sick fucking society. don't you ever fucking accuse americans of being morally bankrupt lest i point out the millions of preteen prostitutes your nation breeds when fathers are not killing daughters because they are valueless.

sick fucking cunts.

Something to think about? (OT) (-1, Offtopic)

Vuarnet (207505) | about 13 years ago | (#2387583)

Indications are that 600,000 people were left homeless, with 348,000 houses destroyed and an additional 844,000 damaged.[...] Government estimates place direct economic losses at $1.3 billion. Other estimates indicate losses may be as high as $5 billion.

If you want to talk about perspective, we have whole areas of India struck by this earthquake, 348k houses damaged, and it costed them almost 5 billion.

On New York, according to this story: "Attacks expected to cost New York at least £40bn" [independent.co.uk] , 2 buildings are destroyed and the cost rises at least eightfold.

Nothing to do with the Ig Noble Awards, I know, but it makes you think about the economical difference between both countries.

Re:Something to think about? (OT) (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2388031)

It's pretty cheap to rebuild 348,000 mud huts and cardboard boxes.

Re:Get some PRIORITIES! (OT) (1, Offtopic)

hrieke (126185) | about 13 years ago | (#2387707)

True. But this is not a board to talk about earthquake aid or other humanitarian help, it about what ever fancies the editors. If you want to start a board on humanitarian aid, please do, and more power to you in doing so.

Re:Get some PRIORITIES! (2)

MaxGrant (159031) | about 13 years ago | (#2388945)

I think it's time we declared "war on tectonics" to prevent a catastrophe like this from ever happening again!

It is you who need to get a sense of perspective. There's not a damn thing any of us can do about preventing earthquakes. It's a "natural disaster." Or the act of a capricious god. It's relatively safe to assume that the next time an earthquake strikes in that region, the inhabitants will have learned what kinds of structures they can and cannot build, and the damage will be minimized accordingly. In the meantime, what precisely do you know about the humanitarian impulses of /. readers?

Re:Get some PRIORITIES! (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2401312)

Bah! Did you read the whole thread? I don't think so.

The thread started with someone complaining that we should not be concerned with trivia such as the ig-nobels in the aftermath of the worst terrorist attack in history. My response could be paraphrased as "Bad shit happens all the time [this is just one example] and you don't always agonize about it on SlashDot, so why start now?"

It was not intended to say anything about tectonics, the socio-economic conditions in developing countries or the humanitarian impulses of Slashdot readers.

Re:Get some PRIORITIES! (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387581)

Get over it already, will ya. Six times as many people die each and every night from hunger as died in the attacks. Maybe you'd care to do them and all of us a favor by forever remaining silent as a token of respect to their memory.

Re:Get some PRIORITIES! (-1)

xXgeneric nicknameXx (463142) | about 13 years ago | (#2390029)

Dude, you get them going EVERY TIME!! You're my hero.

Darwin Contest (1)

da5idnetlimit.com (410908) | about 13 years ago | (#2387520)

Looks a lot like it...

I think to remember their motto was "For those who helped humanity to advance by removing themselves from it".

But then, the site doens give that many clues on what experiences those guys are awarded for...

Don't Worry (1)

steveo777 (183629) | about 13 years ago | (#2388150)

Nature has a way of doing these things...
Soon, the Ig Nobel prizes won't be needed. That is, once some more Darwin awards are handed out.

It's a play on words (1, Redundant)

Edgewize (262271) | about 13 years ago | (#2387524)

Ig Nobel -> ignoble [dictionary.com]

Synonyms of ignoble include disgraceful, shameful, and degenerate.
I'm pretty sure this is not related to the more widely recognized Nobel Prize awards.

Re:It's a play on words (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387525)

Now how the fsck did this become a top-level post? It was definately a reply to post #1 when I submitted it...

Re:It's a play on words (-1, Offtopic)

Cederic (9623) | about 13 years ago | (#2387795)


I'm sorry, you needed a dictionary to work that out?

Jeez, why not give us all a lesson on "How to state the bleedin' obvious"

Re:It's a play on words (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387838)

Trollboy, you're a fucking genious.

Re:It's a play on words (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387883)

Thanks for clearing that up.

The 2000 Ig Nobel Prize Winners (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387530)

Loved those winners of 2000:
CHEMISTRY
"Romantic love may be indistinguishable from having severe obsessive-compulsive disorder." [biopsychiatry.com]

COMPUTER SCIENCE
"Detecting when a cat is walking across your computer keyboard." [bitboost.com]

Of course I always knew the first one, so it's quite useful to tell people who are "in love", dunno about the later.

Cat typing detector? I want one! (5, Funny)

JaredOfEuropa (526365) | about 13 years ago | (#2387600)

I need to stop my damn cat from making all these "first post" posts! Yes, now you know where they come from.

Re:Cat typing detector? I want one! (2)

Hard_Code (49548) | about 13 years ago | (#2388180)

Perhaps that's where all this 'grit' is coming from...

Re:The 2000 Ig Nobel Prize Winners (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387698)

AS the author of the parent post I can now say I found a use for the later, it should have been obvious; detecting when pussy is in reach for us geeks.

love=OCD link is interesting! (1)

pedro (1613) | about 13 years ago | (#2388129)

I don't understand why that sort of research should be considered 'ignoble'. IMHO, it's pretty damned interesting, and could provide insight into, oh, Terrorism, and how sustained ideation about a particular topic can 'lock up' the brain. Perhaps a simple drug therapy, deliverable in an aerosol form and sprayed over a wide area, could unknot the neural systems of obsessed nutcases like the Taliban, and restore them to some degree of sanity.

Re:The 2000 Ig Nobel Prize Winners (1)

ThatComputerGuy (123712) | about 13 years ago | (#2388162)

"Magnetic Resonance Imaging of Male and Female Genitals During Coitus and Female Sexual Arousal."

Now tell me, how many geeks would have loved to sign up for that one "in the name of science"? The study could have been done with a lot more people if just one announcement had been made here on /. ...

Re:The 2000 Ig Nobel Prize Winners (1)

Loligo (12021) | about 13 years ago | (#2389938)

>The study could have been done with a lot more
>people if just one announcement had been made
>here on /. ...

Yeah, but they probably already HAD a thousand horny guys.

They needed more WOMEN for the study.

-l

Heh.... (0, Offtopic)

kinko (82040) | about 13 years ago | (#2387547)

reminds me of someone's sig I've seen....

'I hope when I'm gone, people will remember me and say: "I wonder where Kinko got the plutonium from?"'

--

Re:Heh.... (0, Offtopic)

glenkim (412499) | about 13 years ago | (#2387548)

Wow, if that's so, this guy [slashdot.org] must be a role-model for you.

Levitating Frog (1, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387554)

Last Years Awards Kicked Ass

By Far any away the coolest thing is the levitating frog,

Check out the MPegs and Science behind it, fsuking amazing and something I never thouhgt id see

---Any sufficiently advanced motorbike is indistingasble from magic--

Article for the Slashdot staff (-1)

Trollificus (253741) | about 13 years ago | (#2387562)

Here [apa.org] is an article the Slashdot staff might fight interesting.
It is entitled, "Unskilled and Unaware of It: How Difficulties in Recognizing One's Own Incompetence Lead to Inflated Self-Assessments".
All of you dot-bomb flunkies and management types should take a look at this too.

ObJoke (5, Funny)

imipak (254310) | about 13 years ago | (#2387566)

scientific achievements that cannot, or should not, be reproduced.

I nominate:

  • Windows XP
  • Microsoft Mediaplayer
  • MS SQL Server
  • Last year's winner: IIS, up for a record four years in a row!

Re:ObJoke (2, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387689)

With regards to your use of the word 'scientific'.

To borrow a page from The Princess Bride. I do not that it means what you think it means.

Re:ObJoke (1)

Beckman (136138) | about 13 years ago | (#2388212)

...within rule bending that many CS and /. people apply their view of the world...

Re:ObJoke (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2390664)

If you're going to make a (funny?) quote, at least quote right...

Re:ObJoke (3, Funny)

Lonesmurf (88531) | about 13 years ago | (#2388182)

Just wondered why you put windows 9x in the OS/platforms section of your resume twice. You particularly proud of it of something? :)

I'd change that before showing it around, man.

Re:ObJoke (2, Funny)

stephend (1735) | about 13 years ago | (#2388482)

Last year's winner: IIS, up for a record four years in a row!

That's the first and last time that any Microsoft software has been up for over a year.

And the winner is... (3, Funny)

Domini (103836) | about 13 years ago | (#2387591)


... for most versatile hybrid polymorphic y-chromosome based genome string :

Once again: Cowboy Neal!

Truth in advertising (3, Funny)

streetlawyer (169828) | about 13 years ago | (#2387605)

I object in the strongest possible terms to the idea that this painfully self-conscious attempt at proving that "Scientists aren't all dull" should appear under the category "It's Funny, Laugh", and demand that Slashdot establishes an "It's Embarrassing. Cringe" category for the purpose.



Oh yeh, and the Darwin Awards [adequacy.org] can fuck off too.

Re:Truth in advertising (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387708)

Well, I demand that Slashdot establishes a "streetlawyer's unfunny bullshit" category.

Thanks.

Re:Truth in advertising (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2387937)

>>and demand that Slashdot establishes an "It's Embarrassing. Cringe" category for the purpose

And we should have the same picture appear next to every one of your posts too.

Adequacy sucks and so does your mom and sister.

Re:Truth in advertising (2)

strredwolf (532) | about 13 years ago | (#2388525)

You are located in England, aren't you?

The Ig Nobel Governors board has already heard about your topic from Brittan's govermental head of science. Their responce was akin to "How can you tell if it's funny or not? If Brittan is not allowed it's scientists to laugh at themselves, then it is a dark day in the land of the Queen."

BTW, durring that year, three Brittish scientists came voluntarily to receive their Ig Nobels.

Re:Truth in advertising (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2388823)

You must not get a lot of dates. Grow a sense of humor, it helps, really.

Gone in 60 Seconds (1, Offtopic)

sasha328 (203458) | about 13 years ago | (#2387628)

"A Wedding in 60 Seconds."
I don't think they'll be signing, it takes too long. I think they'll just finger print the wedding certificates.

Desides, where is the science in the wedding?

Re:Gone in 60 Seconds (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 13 years ago | (#2388332)

The science comes from last year winner in economics:

"The Reverend Sun Myung Moon, for bringing efficiency and steady growth to the mass-marriage industry, with, according to his reports, a 36-couple wedding in 1960, a 430-couple wedding in 1968, an 1800-couple wedding in 1975, a 6000-couple wedding in 1982, a 30,000-couple wedding in 1992, a 360,000-couple wedding in 1995, and a 36,000,000-couple wedding in 1997."

Win-A-Date (0, Offtopic)

baronben (322394) | about 13 years ago | (#2387705)

Did any one see the Win a date with a Nobel Laureate? Wish there was still time to enter, I would finaly be able to relize my dream of Romancing Sheldon Glashow. Oh to have a night with that sexy, sexy man

The /. Mongerator Awards (1, Offtopic)

squaretorus (459130) | about 13 years ago | (#2387723)

How about a choice event for the /.ers where the most rediculous moderation gets an award.

Nominations start NOW! event in a month!

Gone in 60 seconds... (0, Offtopic)

Uttles (324447) | about 13 years ago | (#2387789)

Boy if the wedding is that short I'd sure hate to go on that honeymoon...

Hey JACKASS (0, Flamebait)

Uttles (324447) | about 13 years ago | (#2388146)

Moderator: read the damn article before you go modding people down. One of the ceremonies is a 60 second genuine wedding. If you don't agree with my sense of humor then I could understand flamebait or troll although I wouldn't think they would be deserved. Funny would be appreciated, but I'm DEFINITELY not offtopic, asshole.

Things you wanted to know, but afraid to ask (1)

f00zbll (526151) | about 13 years ago | (#2388168)

The awards are funny. I especially like the Medicine, Physics and Peace awards. MEDICINE Willibrord Weijmar Schultz, Pek van Andel, and Eduard Mooyaart of Groningen, The Netherlands, and Ida Sabelis of Amsterdam, for their illuminating report, "Magnetic Resonance Imaging of Male and Female Genitals During Coitus and Female Sexual Arousal." [Published in British Medical Journal, vol. 319, 1999, pp 1596-1600.] PEACE The British Royal Navy, for ordering its sailors to stop using live cannon shells, and to instead just shout "Bang!" PHYSICS Andre Geim of the University of Nijmegen (the Netherlands) and Sir Michael Berry of Bristol University (UK), for using magnets to levitate a frog and a sumo wrestler. [REFERENCE: "Of Flying Frogs and Levitrons" by M.V. Berry and A.K. Geim,European Journal of Physics, v. 18, 1997, p. 307-13.]

Can't take anymore (1)

Clan Hanna (146060) | about 13 years ago | (#2390494)

I managed to sit through almost 37 minutes of this "ceremony," watching the streaming web-cast. I enjoy intelligent people making fools of themselves on stage as much as the next guy, but this was just too much... or maybe too little. I had to turn it off... didn't even get to any of the actual awards, just to the beginning of the first act of the mini-opera, "Marriage Complex."

Not bad, but somebody slap the camera operator! (2)

Dr.Dubious DDQ (11968) | about 13 years ago | (#2390671)

Just got done watching. Not bad. My biggest complaint were the less-than-stellar technicians operating the equipment. The non-functioning (or just misplaced?) microphones, and the camera operator stubbornly focussing on the podium while the activity takes place elsewhere (e.g. the slideshow...)

Did I hear that right? "Stalinworld"???? (the IgNobel Peace Prize winner...)

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