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Ted "A Series of Tubes" Stevens Found Guilty

ScuttleMonkey posted more than 5 years ago | from the now-a-series-of-cells dept.

The Courts 565

techmuse writes "According to a series of tubes sites, Senator Ted Stevens has been found guilty of lying about free home renovations that he received from an oil contractor. He faces up to 5 years in jail, and the outcome of his current reelection bid is now in doubt. 'The conviction came after a tumultuous week in the jury room. First there were complaints about an unruly juror, then another had to be replaced when she left Washington following the death of her father. Finally, jurors on Monday discovered a discrepancy in the indictment that had been overlooked by prosecutors. Jury deliberations in this historic trial have at times been as contentious as some of the proceedings The Justice Department indicted Stevens on July 29, and the Alaska Republican took a huge legal gamble and asked for a speedy trial in order to resolve the charges before Election Day. Judge Emmet Sullivan complied with Stevens' request, and in less than three months from the time of his indictment, Stevens was found guilty.'"

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565 comments

But Colin Powell! (-1, Offtopic)

Toonol (1057698) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533531)

Powell's recent endorsement must not have counted for much, eh?

Re:But Colin Powell! (2, Interesting)

megamerican (1073936) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533693)

When did embracing a war criminal's endorsement become a good thing? People must have short memories. Don't they realize that he sold his credibility down the river so we could go to war with Iraq?

Its also worth mentioning that this endorsement came 2 days after the movie W. released, which painted Colin Powell as a genius. Not surprisingly the movie didn't do very well. Who wants to watch a movie about a recurring nightmare they've had for the past 8 years? Not me.

Re:But Colin Powell! (4, Funny)

Jeremiah Cornelius (137) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533785)

Agreed. Maybe he can join Stevens in the pen, someday.

A Senator in the Fed Pen? he's going to come face to face with a whole new series of tubes!

Re:But Colin Powell! (1, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533961)

Along with Obama? Powell also endorsed him.

Just askin.

Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.

Hey Ted, maybe you can understand this (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533549)

Prison, it's not like a big building, it's more like a series of cubes.

Re:Hey Ted, maybe you can understand this (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533669)

I didn't think it was possible to shoot halloween candy out one's nose, but you AC, have proven me wrong.

Re:Hey Ted, maybe you can understand this (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533995)

I vote this the funniest /. comment all year. Well done.

Re:Hey Ted, maybe you can understand this (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25534009)

it's more like a series of cubes.

in the shape of a bar of soap?

Re:Hey Ted, maybe you can understand this (5, Funny)

spintriae (958955) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534067)

Old Ted had better be watching his ass, lest his own tubes get clogged.

Jail: "Just A Series of Bars" (5, Funny)

KnowledgeEngine (1225122) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533553)

I can forsee the senator saying that his jailtime will be much like living normal life, but behind a series of bars connected together. I look forward to his jailing, so I can enjoy more humorous remarks about the particular "Series of Bars" he is behind at any given time.

Re:Jail: "Just A Series of Bars" (1)

Hatta (162192) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533843)

I look forward to his jailing, so I can enjoy more humorous remarks about the particular "Series of Bars" he is behind at any given time.

If they send him to a Federal PMITA prison, he can look forward to another series of tubes.

Re:Jail: "Just A Series of Bars" (3, Informative)

TheSpoom (715771) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534107)

The sad truth is that he'll probably pay a fine and get off scott-free otherwise.

Nothing to worry about (4, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533555)

Dubya will pardon him on his way out

Scooter will get a full pardon too (in addition to the sentence commutation he already got)

'pubs will take care of their own, don't you worry

Re:Nothing to worry about (5, Insightful)

megamerican (1073936) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533911)

Yes, because only one party is corrupt!

Clinton is well known for having pardoned many cocaine traffickers before leaving office. One of the first things Bush did when getting into office was block a congressional investigation into it.

Whatever you do, don't research Mena, AK [google.com]

Re:Nothing to worry about (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533951)

b-b-b-b-b-b-but Clinton!??!

I love it!

he got a blowjob too!! I swear it, a BJ, right there in the White House!!

Re:Nothing to worry about (2, Insightful)

UnknowingFool (672806) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534093)

Yes, the [other guy] did it, that makes it okay for [your party] to do it. That is hypocrisy at best. Will how about this then: O.J. Simpson got away with murdering 2 people. That gives everyone a pass at a double murder.

Re:Nothing to worry about (4, Insightful)

bigstrat2003 (1058574) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534151)

No one said that it's okay for anyone to do it. Megamerican was merely countering a (probably) deliberately slanted statement with the fact that both parties are corrupt, not just one.

Re:Nothing to worry about (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25534123)

Your link just goes to google.com! They must be part of the conspiracy too!

Meet the new Senator, same as the old Senator... (5, Insightful)

Grandiloquence (1180099) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533557)

I would celebrate, but I know in my heart he'll be replaced by someone just as bad. Our body politic is rotten to the core.

Re:Meet the new Senator, same as the old Senator.. (5, Informative)

vil3nr0b (930195) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533609)

Another bad apple is fine. We will send him to prison just like Stevens. Eventually America will get pissed enough to start hanging these crooks in the street.....then it will stop.

Re:Meet the new Senator, same as the old Senator.. (4, Insightful)

eln (21727) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534047)

232 years and counting, and that still hasn't happened. But sure, the next one will do the trick.

Re:Meet the new Senator, same as the old Senator.. (4, Insightful)

erroneus (253617) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534135)

Corruption is a problem of availability, not so much moral strength.

Separate temptation from politicians and you will see fewer troubles. It would be far cheaper to grant politicians in key positions generous allowances for the rest of their lives and to clear all expenses over certain through some sort of oversight board forbidden to have any contact with the people they are overseeing. They should be very well taken care of and at the same time, isolated from their keepers. Then let the special interests make their arguments for legislation and let it be balanced against public interest groups and may legislators then make fair and balanced choices, actions and decisions.

No more revolving doors. No more contributions from special interests. Once a politician enters public service, he should never again need to consider private sector life and would therefore have less tempting him now and in the future.

Re:Meet the new Senator, same as the old Senator.. (1)

RabidMoose (746680) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533775)

More than likely, he'll be beaten in the election by Mark Begich [wikipedia.org], the current Mayor of Anchorage. Other than being a proponent of photo radar, he doesn't seem like such a bad guy.
That said, power has this tenacious tendancy to corrupt.

Re:Meet the new Senator, same as the old Senator.. (4, Interesting)

rrhal (88665) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534083)

Many Alaskans would vote for a Sled dog if it had a R next its name on the ballot. It wouldn't suprise me if they reelect Stevens - then Sarah Palin would appoint his successor. Sarah may be going to Washington after all. Somehow I just don't see her appointing Cathy Murkowski ...

Re:Meet the new Senator, same as the old Senator.. (1)

shma (863063) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533809)

I would celebrate, but I know in my heart he'll be replaced by someone just as bad. Our body politic is rotten to the core.

Mark Begich [wikipedia.org], mayor of Anchorage, is the man who will most likely replace him if Stevens loses on Nov. 4th. However, I have read [npr.org] that there is no rule in the Senate which forbids senators from being convicted felons. With the option of a Bush pardon still on the table, it is entirely possible that Stevens could hold his senate seat.

Re:Meet the new Senator, same as the old Senator.. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25534063)

That race was neck and neck already. Don't kid yourself. Stevens doesn't have a chance in hell of winning. Even Alaska won't elect a felon.

Re:Meet the new Senator, same as the old Senator.. (0)

Lemmy Caution (8378) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534097)

Stevens feathered his own nest a little bit with his job, but to be honest: what he did wasn't serious and did not have substantial consequences. There's too much Schadenfreude over nothing going on here.

And I say this as someone solidly on the left who is looking forward, somewhat, to a Democratic Congress. It's funny how this kind of error-correction is more likely on the left than on the right, though: people say they are equivalent, but if you look at the margins of left and the right, they way that they treat heterodoxy is different. Nutty liberals get corrected from the center and usually either accept the correction or find another target: the rabid right values loyalty over truth and attacks any nuance or correction as traitorous.

Sorry Ted, (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533565)

time for you to go to jail and receive a series of pubes...

It's not a big truck, its a train

Duh (5, Insightful)

headhot (137860) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533567)

So your a Senator of one of the largest oil producing states, an you hire an oil services company to renovate your house, instead of say, a home builder.

Yea that doesn't look odd at all.

A Series of Metal Bars (0, Redundant)

Jackmon (170028) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533569)

Prison's not a dump truck. It's more like a series of metal bars.

Slight correction (4, Informative)

kithrup (778358) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533577)

He faces up to five years for each count. Although most seem to agree he won't serve anywhere near that much time.

Re:Slight correction (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533789)

Although most seem to agree he won't serve anywhere near that much time.

Because he is so old?

Does he have to pay (4, Funny)

seanadams.com (463190) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533583)

for his own rape kit?

Re:Does he have to pay (1)

sethstorm (512897) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534173)

Never mind who pays for it, will the subsequent marriage be forced for the sake of morality? Or will he claim that they had no authority to prosecute him, claiming that it was a Democrat witch hunt?

Here is hoping (5, Interesting)

sithkhan (536425) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533591)

I hope he does the proper thing and resigns. Although the Republicans cannot afford a single loss of Senate seats, he needs to immediately show respect to the people of Alaska. Of course, I'm still waiting for William Jefferson (D - LA) to do the right thing too ...

Summary Correction (5, Informative)

epdp14 (1318641) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533593)

The summary indicates that he faces up to 5 years in jail. This is incorrect. He faces up to 5 years in jail *per count*. Source: http://www.cnn.com/2008/POLITICS/10/27/stevens.jurors/index.html [cnn.com]

Re:Summary Correction (4, Informative)

mikael (484) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533739)

A total of 35 years:

The jury found Stevens guilty of "knowingly and willfully" scheming to conceal on Senate disclosure forms more than $250,000 in home renovations and other gifts from an Alaska-based oil industry contractor.

Stevens faces a maximum sentence of up to to 35 years in prison -- five years for each of the seven counts.

The contractor is VECO [wikipedia.org], who wanted to build a gas pipeline from Alaska

Welcome to PMITA Federal Prison... (2, Funny)

nweaver (113078) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533597)

A scene a few months from now:

Hello senator. Congratulations on being reelected dispite being a convicted felon. I hope you enjoy serving your remaining term in PMITA Federal Prsion. Have a nice day.

Re:Welcome to PMITA Federal Prison... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533815)

Please, he would so go to a country club prison. Does he look black to you?

The sad thing (5, Insightful)

internerdj (1319281) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533599)

The truely sad thing is that if he is reelected then he can serve. Forgetting there being no law against a felon holding office. Shouldn't there be some law to protect the American people from legislators who commit felonies relating to their position?

Re:The sad thing (4, Insightful)

ScoLgo (458010) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533701)

To win a political race against Stevens, all his opponent needs do is bring this conviction up. That's not saying that I disagree with you but the real world will probably take care of this without the need for more laws.

Re:The sad thing (4, Insightful)

eln (21727) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534145)

Not necessarily. Most people will vote for a long-term Senator because they have a lot of seniority, and seniority in the Senate is everything. A very senior Senator will be able to have much greater influence and be much more successful at getting earmarks passed.

In short, as long as a Senator is able to bring home the bacon to his district, a little thing like a felony conviction won't necessarily do him in.

Re:The sad thing (1)

Lemmy Caution (8378) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534153)

Perhaps. It depends on how partisan his constituency is. It may be that in Alaska, the Republicans are the Harlem Globetrotters and the Democrats are the Washington Generals.

Re:The sad thing (1, Redundant)

rautell (531390) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533745)

Crazy, Felons can't vote in many states, but they can still hold federal office.

Re:The sad thing (4, Informative)

SydShamino (547793) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533753)

Shouldn't there be some law to protect the American people from legislators who commit felonies relating to their position?

if he is reelected

Didn't you answer your own question? We already have election law and it allows us to choose to replace our criminal legislators, or, if we feel that they are still able to competently serve us, choose to return them to office.

Re:The sad thing (1)

internerdj (1319281) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533867)

But while representing a single state, he has proven he has the clout to hold sway over decisions affecting groups larger than his state. He is known to be a master of the pork-barrel and there are 49 states that have no say in his reelection that are affected by his actions. Maybe Alaskans don't want him now that he is a criminal, maybe they don't agree with the jury. We all know here, 10 people is hardly a useful survey sample.

Re:The sad thing (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533813)

Yeah, it's called not voting for them.

Seriously, there shouldn't need to be any other rules about it: If you are in jail because you embezzled funds from the government, there shouldn't be any idiots idiotic enough to elect you.

(Sadly, that assumes that there is a limit to how idiotic people can be.)

Re:The sad thing (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533863)

Ah, I see you have forgotten the age-old axiom, "Make it idiot-proof and they'll just make a better idiot"?
--

Re:The sad thing (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533821)

Shouldn't there be some law to protect the American people from legislators who commit felonies relating to their position?

No. If the American People(tm) don't want convicted felons in positions of power, they always have the option of not voting for them.

IF the American People(tm) still vote for someone they know is a convicted felon, then maybe they want them in that position despite their past felonies. Who are you to tell them they haven't got the right to elect this person?

Re:The sad thing (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533873)

So convicted felons can serve and vote in the senate, but are generally restricted from voting in general elections.

"America the Beautiful" indeed.

Re:The sad thing (1)

UnknowingFool (672806) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533963)

While there isn't a law specifically forbidding a felon from being elected to the Senate, the Senate would most likely censure him and remove him from his seat should he be elected.

Re:The sad thing (0)

Chemisor (97276) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533971)

> Shouldn't there be some law to protect the American people from legislators
> who commit felonies relating to their position?

Did you know that desertion from the army is a felony? Do you also know that the Pope was a deserter [wikipedia.org] in WWII? While desertion at the time of peace is just a felony (2-3 years max imprisonment in the US), during war it is punishable by death. If you insist on lumping all "felons" together as automatically evil, I would suggest that if you are good enough for the Holy See, you are probably good enough (too good?) to run for the US Senate.

Re:The sad thing (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533975)

Convicted felons cannot vote. but can run for the office...

Re:The sad thing (4, Informative)

kabloom (755503) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534041)

The senate ethics committee can recommend that the he be expelled from senate by a 2/3 vote. The ethics committee has recommended such things before, but nobody's ever been expelled because they all resign first.

The more likely possibility, however, is that Senator Stevens' close senate race has just gone down a series of tubes because of this.

Could this hurt McCain/Palin? (4, Insightful)

Doug52392 (1094585) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533613)

This pretty much ruined Ted's shot of being reelected, but will this hurt the image of political figures from Alaska? So close to election day, could this affect Sarah Palin's image? Morality? (Which has already been questioned).

So what could this do to John McCain's campaign?

(Probably already missed first post)

Re:Could this hurt McCain/Palin? (1, Troll)

richardkelleher (1184251) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533801)

Pretty much to late for anyone else to do damage to the M/P ticket. M's selection of P as his running mate took care of what little was left of his credibility.

Re:Could this hurt McCain/Palin? (5, Insightful)

rudedog (7339) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533957)

This pretty much ruined Ted's shot of being reelected

They're so cute when they're in their young, naive stage. Too bad they grow up so fast.

About Time . . . (1)

LordGr8one (1174233) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533619)

Finally. I'm only saddened that it took criminal charges to get rid of that porker. I wonder how Sarah Palin is going to govern her state without all that federal money coming in?

Re:About Time . . . (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25534103)

Probably with the Oil tax revenues of which the Federal Government gets 50%, or were you just trolling?

The tube argument applied to prison (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533639)

Ted Stevens - "They want to deliver vast amounts of information (cocks) over the Internet (Teds Tube). And again, the Internet is not something that you just dump something on (gotta lube it first). It's not a big truck (no its not a big truck, its a big cock). It's a series of tubes (anuses). And if you don't understand, those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material(sperm)."

Poor Senator... (0, Redundant)

Phizzle (1109923) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533717)

Instead of getting "gifts" he should have taken money wired through a "Series of Tubes" to an dummy company somewhere in Panama.

That's five years on each count. (0, Redundant)

richardkelleher (1184251) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533723)

If you check you will find that that is 5 years on each count. I haven't seen anyone report how many counts there are, but the implication is that the number is greater than one. He will of course not spend a day in jail. If need be, such a friend of the oil industry will be pardoned by the great tool of the oil industry, Dick Cheney who will pull the appropriate string on his puppet and have Bush issue a pardon.

I feel sorry for this guy (4, Insightful)

fermion (181285) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533733)

Stevens probably did a lot to help alaska. He probably knows more about the politics than anyone. He was in office for, what, 40 years, only 9 years less than Alaska has been a state. And the charges might be trumped out, and the defense was good. It was essentially what Reagan used in his drug smuggling case. I was not my doing, I don't recall, I don't know. So it is probably an effort to get him out of office. If he should have to office for so long.

OTOH, one has to think that a guy that can't control his household might be over the edges. That he is so much a part of the Washington Elite, that he might not distinguish between what is done to benefit the country and what is done to enrich himself. It really speaks to the accumulation of power, and the corruption that accompanies it. One can imagine that a dictator might not be such a bad thing, except eventually the accumulated power and privilege ends up warping the sense of reality to a mentally deformed image. It is kind of the story of this election, can a guy with 8 houses and 13 cars and a corporate jet and a young rich second wife really represent the bulk of the people who do not have any of these. I don't know. It will be a change in Alaska, and we will see if they can make it. If they have been broken from their benevolent benefactor, or freed from their father figure. I sure he did good, but perhaps did not get out when the good he did was not overwhelming.

Re:I feel sorry for this guy (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533861)

Well, I guess I can take that to the bank

Re:I feel sorry for this guy (0, Flamebait)

fuzzyfuzzyfungus (1223518) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533923)

You didn't just... seriously... describe the Reagan defense as "good"? Please, seriously?

The "Either I'm guilty as all fuck or I have no idea what even my senior people are doing" defense?

Damn my sense of decorum (0, Redundant)

lemur666 (313121) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533737)

I wonder if his fellow prisoners will come to view Mr. Stevens as "a series of..." It's a joke that begs to be made. But I just can't...

Let's just say I hope Mr. Steven's enjoys his new position on the Cigarette Appropriations Committee" and leave it at that.

WTF?!!? (5, Informative)

robinsonne (952701) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533759)

Despite being a convicted felon, he is not required to drop out of the race or resign from the Senate. If he wins re-election, he can continue to hold his seat because there is no rule barring felons from serving in Congress. The Senate could vote to expel Stevens on a two-thirds vote. Article here [msn.com]

WTF?!?! Seriously?

From same article, when asked about stepping down: "Put this down: That will never happen - ever, OK?" Stevens said in the weeks leading up to his trial. "I am not stepping down. I'm going to run through and I'm going to win this election.

What an absolutely arrogant bastard! It's good to know what the rule of law really means to the men in charge of this country.

Re:WTF?!!? (5, Insightful)

Snowblindeye (1085701) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533943)

... there is no rule barring felons from serving in Congress.

Aren't felons barred from voting? So, they can't be trusted enough to cast one vote in several millions, but they can be trusted enough to be a Senator?

Re:WTF?!!? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25534045)

...We look after our own.

Re:WTF?!!? (2, Insightful)

MBCook (132727) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533989)

If felons were barred from serving in the Senate / Congress, then all you'd have to do is get people you don't like convicted of little petty things which may technically be felonies (due to their positions) and you could control who was in charge. It's probably for the best things are this way. The leaders of the Senate can kick him out if they want, as that MSN article says.

Should a few parking tickets get someone kicked out of congress? I'm not supporting being a scoff-law about them, but would that really necessitate removing them from office?

That said, I'd support a mandatory recall election on representatives who are convicted of felonies.

Or I would if he wasn't up for re-election in less than 2 weeks anyway.

Re:WTF?!!? (1)

LearnToSpell (694184) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534129)

Parking tickets aren't even a criminal offense in most places, let alone a felony. Got a better example of a "little petty thing" that's a felony?

Re:WTF?!!? (1)

PolygamousRanchKid (1290638) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534141)

Despite being a convicted felon, he is not required to drop out of the race or resign from the Senate.

WTF?!?! Seriously?

"Let's get felons off the streets of America, and back into Congress where they belong!

Corrupt bastard (1)

nzgeek (232346) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533793)

I don't care about the hype around the silly "series of tubes" comment. The corrupt bastard got what he deserved.
Kickbacks are far too common in politics, and ultimately lead to the "lobbyist" driven politics like the DMCA.

A New Hope... (1)

CorporateSuit (1319461) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533839)

Everyone's known this guy was corrupt when he gave his silver-tongued speech about the blogotubes years ago. Today, we finally see that sometimes, someone will do something about it -- and succeed. Now, if only we could get some 5-year prison sentences rolled out for all those who didn't vote an explicit "Nay" on the FISA bill Before my little girl loses faith in democracy...

Can he vote? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533849)

Convicted felons in Alaska are unable to vote while they are serving their sentence, so I find it very odd that they would be able to run for office.

Dear Ted: (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533903)

Have fun at Gitmo [blogspot.com].

Cordially,
Kilgore Trout

he'll be pardoned for sure (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#25533913)

Why do you think he wanted a speedy trial?

He lost his conservative media blessing. (0, Flamebait)

sethstorm (512897) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533919)

Now when will it be Palin's turn, or will they just simply say that they didn't have the authority?

Turn about is fair play (0, Flamebait)

DynaSoar (714234) | more than 5 years ago | (#25533925)

There'll be enough signal as well as noise regarding felony conviction vs. senate election and so forth. I've got a different angle:

If Stevens is guilty, then the oil company/lobby/unnamed source is too. Said 'too' is undoubtedly backed by big money (of at least buy-a-Senator amounts). As a sentence, whether from the senate building or a jail cell, Stevens should be made to administer an agency that uses money from 'too' to renovate everybody else's houses. To add a touch of irony, the covered renovations should only be those which reduce oil consumption.

Sure it's silly. So's the assumption that Stevens will suffer any ill effects of any sentence. He's too rich for that to happen.

If you think about it (1)

Joseph1337 (1146047) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534143)

the anus is just like a series of tubes. You can also put other tubes into them. That's what real love is all about dear friend

Give a break on "series of tubes" (3, Insightful)

gorehog (534288) | more than 5 years ago | (#25534149)

Alright, I'm certainly happy to see Ted Stevens convicted. He probably deserves it. I am in fact a far left winger. I'm always happy to see any Republican convicted of anything.

With that said:

Give Ted Stevens a break on the "series of tubes" analogy. He was trying to describe saturation of available bandwidth in terms of water going through a pipe. It is a particularly good analogy given that educational metaphor for electrical systems are usually in terms of water in a pipe (or tube). All the snickering about "tubes" makes us look stupid to the community that knows about these things. Among the slashdot community it is just self-degrading. We should know better and attack him with points of merit.

To sum up...Ted Steven's tubes refer to capacity of bandwidth to carry data. He does not seem to think that the internet is a bunch of vacuum tube technology. To persist with this insult makes the critic look stupid, not the target.

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