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297 comments

Your official guide to the Jigaboo presidency (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005381)

Congratulations on your purchase of a brand new nigger! If handled properly, your apeman will give years of valuable, if reluctant, service.

INSTALLING YOUR NIGGER.
You should install your nigger differently according to whether you have purchased the field or house model. Field niggers work best in a serial configuration, i.e. chained together. Chain your nigger to another nigger immediately after unpacking it, and don't even think about taking that chain off, ever. Many niggers start singing as soon as you put a chain on them. This habit can usually be thrashed out of them if nipped in the bud. House niggers work best as standalone units, but should be hobbled or hamstrung to prevent attempts at escape. At this stage, your nigger can also be given a name. Most owners use the same names over and over, since niggers become confused by too much data. Rufus, Rastus, Remus, Toby, Carslisle, Carlton, Hey-You!-Yes-you!, Yeller, Blackstar, and Sambo are all effective names for your new buck nigger. If your nigger is a ho, it should be called Latrelle, L'Tanya, or Jemima. Some owners call their nigger hoes Latrine for a joke. Pearl, Blossom, and Ivory are also righteous names for nigger hoes. These names go straight over your nigger's head, by the way.

CONFIGURING YOUR NIGGER
Owing to a design error, your nigger comes equipped with a tongue and vocal chords. Most niggers can master only a few basic human phrases with this apparatus - "muh dick" being the most popular. However, others make barking, yelping, yapping noises and appear to be in some pain, so you should probably call a vet and have him remove your nigger's tongue. Once de-tongued your nigger will be a lot happier - at least, you won't hear it complaining anywhere near as much. Niggers have nothing interesting to say, anyway. Many owners also castrate their niggers for health reasons (yours, mine, and that of women, not the nigger's). This is strongly recommended, and frankly, it's a mystery why this is not done on the boat

HOUSING YOUR NIGGER.
Your nigger can be accommodated in cages with stout iron bars. Make sure, however, that the bars are wide enough to push pieces of nigger food through. The rule of thumb is, four niggers per square yard of cage. So a fifteen foot by thirty foot nigger cage can accommodate two hundred niggers. You can site a nigger cage anywhere, even on soft ground. Don't worry about your nigger fashioning makeshift shovels out of odd pieces of wood and digging an escape tunnel under the bars of the cage. Niggers never invented the shovel before and they're not about to now. In any case, your nigger is certainly too lazy to attempt escape. As long as the free food holds out, your nigger is living better than it did in Africa, so it will stay put. Buck niggers and hoe niggers can be safely accommodated in the same cage, as bucks never attempt sex with black hoes.

FEEDING YOUR NIGGER.
Your Nigger likes fried chicken, corn bread, and watermelon. You should therefore give it none of these things because its lazy ass almost certainly doesn't deserve it. Instead, feed it on porridge with salt, and creek water. Your nigger will supplement its diet with whatever it finds in the fields, other niggers, etc. Experienced nigger owners sometimes push watermelon slices through the bars of the nigger cage at the end of the day as a treat, but only if all niggers have worked well and nothing has been stolen that day. Mike of the Old Ranch Plantation reports that this last one is a killer, since all niggers steal something almost every single day of their lives. He reports he doesn't have to spend much on free watermelon for his niggers as a result. You should never allow your nigger meal breaks while at work, since if it stops work for more than ten minutes it will need to be retrained. You would be surprised how long it takes to teach a nigger to pick cotton. You really would. Coffee beans? Don't ask. You have no idea.

MAKING YOUR NIGGER WORK.
Niggers are very, very averse to work of any kind. The nigger's most prominent anatomical feature, after all, its oversized buttocks, which have evolved to make it more comfortable for your nigger to sit around all day doing nothing for its entire life. Niggers are often good runners, too, to enable them to sprint quickly in the opposite direction if they see work heading their way. The solution to this is to *dupe* your nigger into working. After installation, encourage it towards the cotton field with blows of a wooden club, fence post, baseball bat, etc., and then tell it that all that cotton belongs to a white man, who won't be back until tomorrow. Your nigger will then frantically compete with the other field niggers to steal as much of that cotton as it can before the white man returns. At the end of the day, return your nigger to its cage and laugh at its stupidity, then repeat the same trick every day indefinitely. Your nigger comes equipped with the standard nigger IQ of 75 and a memory to match, so it will forget this trick overnight. Niggers can start work at around 5am. You should then return to bed and come back at around 10am. Your niggers can then work through until around 10pm or whenever the light fades.

ENTERTAINING YOUR NIGGER.
Your nigger enjoys play, like most animals, so you should play with it regularly. A happy smiling nigger works best. Games niggers enjoy include: 1) A good thrashing: every few days, take your nigger's pants down, hang it up by its heels, and have some of your other niggers thrash it with a club or whip. Your nigger will signal its intense enjoyment by shrieking and sobbing. 2) Lynch the nigger: niggers are cheap and there are millions more where yours came from. So every now and then, push the boat out a bit and lynch a nigger.

Lynchings are best done with a rope over the branch of a tree, and niggers just love to be lynched. It makes them feel special. Make your other niggers watch. They'll be so grateful, they'll work harder for a day or two (and then you can lynch another one). 3) Nigger dragging: Tie your nigger by one wrist to the tow bar on the back of suitable vehicle, then drive away at approximately 50mph. Your nigger's shrieks of enjoyment will be heard for miles. It will shriek until it falls apart. To prolong the fun for the nigger, do *NOT* drag him by his feet, as his head comes off too soon. This is painless for the nigger, but spoils the fun. Always wear a seatbelt and never exceed the speed limit. 4) Playing on the PNL: a variation on (2), except you can lynch your nigger out in the fields, thus saving work time. Niggers enjoy this game best if the PNL is operated by a man in a tall white hood. 5) Hunt the nigger: a variation of Hunt the Slipper, but played outdoors, with Dobermans. WARNING: do not let your Dobermans bite a nigger, as they are highly toxic.

DISPOSAL OF DEAD NIGGERS.
Niggers die on average at around 40, which some might say is 40 years too late, but there you go. Most people prefer their niggers dead, in fact. When yours dies, report the license number of the car that did the drive-by shooting of your nigger. The police will collect the nigger and dispose of it for you.

COMMON PROBLEMS WITH NIGGERS - MY NIGGER IS VERY AGGRESIVE
Have it put down, for god's sake. Who needs an uppity nigger? What are we, short of niggers or something?

MY NIGGER KEEPS RAPING WHITE WOMEN
They all do this. Shorten your nigger's chain so it can't reach any white women, and arm heavily any white women who might go near it.

WILL MY NIGGER ATTACK ME?
Not unless it outnumbers you 20 to 1, and even then, it's not likely. If niggers successfully overthrew their owners, they'd have to sort out their own food. This is probably why nigger uprisings were nonexistent (until some fool gave them rights).

MY NIGGER BITCHES ABOUT ITS "RIGHTS" AND "RACISM".
Yeah, well, it would. Tell it to shut the fuck up.

MY NIGGER'S HIDE IS A FUNNY COLOR. - WHAT IS THE CORRECT SHADE FOR A NIGGER?
A nigger's skin is actually more or less transparent. That brown color you can see is the shit your nigger is full of. This is why some models of nigger are sold as "The Shitskin".

MY NIGGER ACTS LIKE A NIGGER, BUT IS WHITE.
What you have there is a "wigger". Rough crowd. WOW!

IS THAT LIKE AN ALBINO? ARE THEY RARE?
They're as common as dog shit and about as valuable. In fact, one of them was President between 1992 and 2000. Put your wigger in a cage with a few hundred genuine niggers and you'll soon find it stops acting like a nigger. However, leave it in the cage and let the niggers dispose of it. The best thing for any wigger is a dose of TNB.

MY NIGGER SMELLS REALLY BAD
And you were expecting what?

SHOULD I STORE MY DEAD NIGGER?
When you came in here, did you see a sign that said "Dead nigger storage"? .That's because there ain't no goddamn sign.

Re:Your official guide to the Jigaboo presidency (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005407)

oh fuck no, I've been swapped into a nigger's body!

[gunshot]

Re:Your official guide to the Jigaboo presidency (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005437)

Nice try. Go back to 4chan and an hero.

What the heck happened to meta-moderation? (5, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005649)

As reported [slashdot.org], there have been a lot of bad moderations recently. It seems this is due to CmdrTaco and chums turning meta-moderation into a weird Digg clone.

Please CmdrTaco, just bring the old meta-moderation system back. It worked, very well, by allowing people to vote on whether a moderation was fair. The new system simply asks the user to Agree/Disagree with a post (don't fool yourselves into thinking it will be used in any other way), ergo it cannot perform the job of meta-moderation.

Brought to you by the: Discussions About Slashdot Itself are not Off-Topic, Troll, Flamebait or Redundant Dept.

Re:What the heck happened to meta-moderation? (5, Insightful)

Ethanol-fueled (1125189) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006517)

Seconded, the old metamod system and user pages were fast, simple, and very effective. I used to meta-mod every day, now the metamods and user pages have become so bloated and unwieldy I've lost all motivation to participate despite having excellent karma. I'm considering letting my subscription expire and becoming a full-time lurker.

Please, head honchos of Slashdot, revert to the old style metamods and user pages or at least allow us the option to control what cruft is grafted to our user page. Slashdot would lose a lot of cred if it degenerated into digg.

Re:Your official guide to the Jigaboo presidency (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26006565)

Go fuck yourself in teh ass tunnel.

Ghost in the Shell (4, Interesting)

Drakkenmensch (1255800) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005439)

This experiment opens an interesting possibility in the field of full body replacements, so far a topic purely in the realm of sci-fi, anime and cyberpunk. At the same time, it makes me wonder even more if the Major's original organic body may in fact have been male, with little to no adaptation discomfort after the procedure...

Re:Ghost in the Shell (4, Funny)

bigstrat2003 (1058574) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005455)

/cry

Please don't introduce thoughts like this into my brain when talking about hot female characters... I'll never be able to look at her the same way again!

Re:Ghost in the Shell (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005645)

/cry

Please don't introduce thoughts like this into my brain when talking about hot female characters... I'll never be able to look at her the same way again!

Don't worry, an episode of GITS 2.0(?) showed she was in fact a girl.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (1)

bigstrat2003 (1058574) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005683)

You're right, I had forgot about that. Of course, it doesn't rule out the possibility that she had a male cybernetic body at some point... O.o

Re:Ghost in the Shell (2, Insightful)

Thansal (999464) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005887)

She repeatedly mentions she has no interest in a male body (generally when talking to Batou), we also get a couple flashbacks to various points in her past where she is still in a female cyber body.

Don't worry, your fapping is perfectly safe from your homophobic fears :)

Re:Ghost in the Shell (4, Insightful)

bigstrat2003 (1058574) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006019)

Don't worry, your fapping is perfectly safe from your homophobic fears :)

I'm guessing you were joking, since I certainly have been joking about this, but I do feel the need to point something out seriously. Not being comfortable with someone you were attracted to turning out to be male isn't homophobia in the least. Homophobia is having negative reactions towards other people who are gay. Not being comfortable with gayness for yourself, though, is perfectly acceptable. Why choose such a negative-laced word?

Re:Ghost in the Shell (4, Insightful)

butterflysrage (1066514) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006357)

the term you are thinking of is 'internalized homophobia', and it too is incorrect in this case. Internalized homophobia would be if you felt bad about your attraction BECAUSE it was same-sex, male to female attraction, regardless of the bits involved, is heterosexual by its very nature and would therefor not fall under homophobia, internalized or otherwise.

being uncomfortable/hostile/bad reaction of your choice about someone being a different gender or sex then you expected would be transphobia.

the more you know (insert shooting_star.gif here)

but I would dispute the "perfectly acceptable" part of your point too... many people commit suicide every year because they are unable to accept their sexuality, many more are assaulted, raped or murdered by others who lash out because of their internalized homophobia. Call me a leftist nutter, but anything that gets thousands of people killed yearly is not something I would tag as "perfectly acceptable".

Re:Ghost in the Shell (5, Insightful)

bigstrat2003 (1058574) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006507)

but I would dispute the "perfectly acceptable" part of your point too... many people commit suicide every year because they are unable to accept their sexuality, many more are assaulted, raped or murdered by others who lash out because of their internalized homophobia. Call me a leftist nutter, but anything that gets thousands of people killed yearly is not something I would tag as "perfectly acceptable".

I won't call you a leftist nutter, but I will call you wrong. There are many things in our world which are "perfectly acceptable", but get people killed because people misuse them or react badly to them. I'm sure more than one person has committed suicide because of their unrequited love for someone, but that doesn't make being in love unacceptable, nor does it make non-reciprocity of love unacceptable. It just means that it's unfortunate that someone couldn't cope with something adequately, and made a bad choice about how to resolve the issue.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (1)

genner (694963) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006267)

Don't worry, your fapping is perfectly safe from your homophobic fears :)

Good, I as worried for a moment.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (1)

hardburn (141468) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005875)

That's Stand Alone Complex, though. The earlier movies and the magna are all different universes that can and do contridict each other.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (1)

genner (694963) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006295)

That's Stand Alone Complex, though. The earlier movies and the magna are all different universes that can and do contridict each other.

They don't contradict. It's all a vast connection of flashbacks and dream sequences that only seem to contradict each other. Layers apon layers.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005535)

Watch GiTS:SAC Second Gig for the story on how the Major became who she is. ;-)

Re:Ghost in the Shell (3, Informative)

sexconker (1179573) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005567)

Ghost in the Shell is trash.

The first one is your typical hyper-complicated (to make it seem intelligent when it is in fact simply ridiculous) anime with ridiculous robots and sexy female combatants.

It's great for action and style, but terrible for sci-fi. Anyone who says it's deep or has any meaning is either delusional, or has never seen any sci-fi ever.

Everything after (Innocence, Stand Alone Complex, whatever else they crank out) is utter trash, on the level of SAW sequels.

Sorry.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (-1, Flamebait)

bigstrat2003 (1058574) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005633)

Anyone who says it's deep or has any meaning is either delusional, or has never seen any sci-fi ever.

I offer a third, and fourth possibility: you're a troll, or you're an overly-self-important jerk who feels the need to shit on things people enjoy without any provocation whatsoever.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (4, Funny)

Ultra64 (318705) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005729)

The first one is your typical hyper-complicated (to make it seem intelligent when it is in fact simply ridiculous)...

You *could* just admit you didn't understand it rather than whining about it.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (0, Troll)

Hurricane78 (562437) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005987)

[...] your typical hyper-complicated (to make it seem intelligent when it is in fact simply ridiculous) anime[...]

- hyper-complicated: What idiots say when they are unable to understand things that go a bit over the average Joe's head.
- ridiculous: What idiots say when they lack the phantasy to understand how this is possible.

Seriously. How many great movies god destroyed by retarded critics and watchers who did not get it?
"Revolver" is one example. It's a brilliant movie. But you require a brain for it. And it did not even made it to german cinemas, because most british people did not understand it and therefore hated it (instead of themselves).
Or Ju-On (1&2). You have to have phantasy to feel the horror in it. Someone with a numb mind (like a friend of mine) hated it. He told me that "nothing was happening", while in fact tons of shit was happening just above the subconcious level. He's more of a gore type.

And then they praise total "explain everything and show it right in your face so you fuckin' get it" trash like Hellboy and Saw.
Good thing you at least hated the Saw sequels

.

Let me make a quick judgement: From my standpoint and the information you gave me about you, you seem to be trash yourself. :P

Re:Ghost in the Shell (1)

philspear (1142299) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006387)

Anyone who says it's deep or has any meaning is either delusional, or has never seen any sci-fi ever.

Or, they have, and have realized that far, far better than "real" sci fi are

...ridiculous robots and sexy female combatants.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (2, Interesting)

Jabbrwokk (1015725) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005707)

Or how about mind-controlled battlefield terminators? Where the soldiers have their minds linked up to robots and fight from a safe, remote location? And when everyone has this technology fighting wars would be just like a really expensive video game.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (1)

Cowmonaut (989226) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005791)

Because when you run out of "lives" they'll just send you out there in person. Or the facility you are 'playing' from will be nuked from orbit. Just to be sure.

Re:Ghost in the Shell (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26006591)

I have one question: WHEN can I have this for SecondLife?????? droooool....

Re:Ghost in the Shell (1)

Surreal Puppet (1408635) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006609)

In the TV series, she gets her first body at the hospital as a child after a plane crash. Swapping her cyborg body gender in that situation seems unlikely.

From the 'put-body-out-of-mind' department... (2, Interesting)

Smidge207 (1278042) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005441)

I suppose out of body experiences are sort of like brain malfunctions. Perhaps fun if you experience one in the right state of mind (like really good weed). This might make an awesome VR game. Just 'a thought.'

=Smidge=

Re:From the 'put-body-out-of-mind' department... (2, Funny)

Hordeking (1237940) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005717)

I suppose out of body experiences are sort of like brain malfunctions. Perhaps fun if you experience one in the right state of mind (like really good weed). This might make an awesome VR game. Just 'a thought.'

=Smidge=

To be honest, I'd rather actually consume some really good weed than simulate it.

Quite a letdown... (5, Interesting)

CaptainPatent (1087643) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005481)

Ok, I was absolutely pumped because the subject line of this story made it sound like they successfully transplanted a brain or something...

After reading the article they were just simultaneously poking people with sticks...

perhaps now that you have that insight you can "mentally swap" the disappointment I'm feeling.

Re:Quite a letdown... (5, Funny)

gEvil (beta) (945888) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005511)

perhaps now that you have that insight you can "mentally swap" the disappointment I'm feeling.

Hey, good news! You've succeeded!

Re:Quite a letdown... (4, Funny)

CaptainPatent (1087643) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005557)

Hey, good news! You've succeeded!

I think we're on to something!

Tomorrow's headline:
Article misrepresenting "mental body swapping" leads to mental body swapping!

Re:Quite a letdown... (5, Funny)

brian0918 (638904) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005599)

After reading the article they were just simultaneously poking people with sticks...

One experiment involved using the researchers themselves. Another experiment used mannequins found in the dumpster behind a department store. They also mention using chairs and blocks of wood as test equipment. Is it just me, or does it sound like scientific research in Sweden is ridiculously underfunded?

Re:Quite a letdown... (1)

jellomizer (103300) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005869)

Wast not, want not. The effort of getting funding for a mannequins and other stuff even if it was simple is probably still more effort then just taking one out of the dumpster. Besides they can use the money for things they really need.

Re:Quite a letdown... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26006579)

Wast not, want not.

Can't wast any lttrs in ths uncrtain conomic tims

Re:Quite a letdown... (1)

Culture20 (968837) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006063)

also mention using chairs and blocks of wood as test equipment. Is it just me, or does it sound like scientific research in Sweden is ridiculously underfunded?

Ikea is Swedish, right?

Re:Quite a liedown...? (1)

PolygamousRanchKid (1290638) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006049)

and even feeling at home in the body of someone of the opposite sex.

After reading the article they were just simultaneously poking people with sticks...

Hmmm . . . I think there might be joke in there somewhere, but I seem to be a little slow tonight.

Or maybe I'm just not knowledgeable about the latest Fetish du Jour . . .

Re:Quite a letdown... (1)

ninjackn (1424235) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006127)

It's more of imagined physical response based on what you see than "mental body-swapping". It's like when you see a guy on TV get painfully hit in the balls and then you cover your own pair and let out a small gasp in imagined pain.

Looks like we're sill a ways away from males knowing what it feels like to give birth to a child and from females knowing what it's let to get hit in the family jewels.

Re:Quite a letdown... (5, Interesting)

ejdmoo (193585) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006167)

If you've ever done an experiment like this (there are smaller scale versions), they are very weird. I can't imagine a full body experience.

Example:
The one I have done involves sitting behind someone, eyes closed, and having your nose stroked (by a third party) while you stroke someone else's nose in front of you. After a few seconds, your brain "clicks" and you feel like you have an incredibly long nose. This is because of the feedback loop where your brain feels something on your nose and your finger simultaneously, and your mental body image just changes instantly.

Re:Quite a letdown... (2, Funny)

bughunter (10093) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006577)

After a few seconds, your brain "clicks" and you feel like you have an incredibly long nose.

Just imagine the profitability of the pr0n applications of this technology!

Amazing waste of time and money (5, Funny)

baggins2001 (697667) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005541)

I mean, how many of us guys haven't already realized that we're just lesbians trapped in male bodies.

So I'm gay, get over it.

I thought I saw this already (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005549)

Isn't this a repost?

Maybe my body double saw and I just think I saw it.

This crap is lame -- we are subject to psychological trickery. Go figure.

Re:I thought I saw this already (4, Informative)

DeadManCoding (961283) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005623)

True, we are subject to psychological trickery. But the test are pretty conclusive, as I actually RTFA. If a human brain can perceive an artificial body as it's own in the psychological and physiological sense, it gives researchers a great deal of more research to do. This allows us to "place" a human brain inside an artificial body and still retain full abilities without major psychological damage. That's a serious trick to perform, as once we lose that ownership of the body, behavior can be significantly modified.

Re:I thought I saw this already (1)

TubeSteak (669689) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005849)

I wonder how this would work on placing people into dummies with an amputated limb and placing amputated individuals into dummies with all their limbs.

Maybe there could be some theraputic value to this mental trickery.

Re:I thought I saw this already (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26006095)

Why am I having visions of Futurama jar heads on robot bodies?

Re:I thought I saw this already (1)

mcgrew (92797) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006611)

Once we get humaniform robots perfected, this could be a great boon to the disabled. Imagine being a quadraplegic, using a robot body you control with your brain to play baseball from the comfort of your basement.

Of course, before robotics gets good enough for that, we'll have exoskeletons that the disabled can wear that will negate the need for a full robot. The world is already full of cyborgs (I'm one, so's Dick Cheney, so's your grandma if she has an artificial hip).

Simulation (3, Interesting)

kvezach (1199717) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005575)

Does this make anybody else think of the "sim-stims" of Neuromancer?

First Person Shooter (5, Interesting)

Reziac (43301) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005829)

Nope, but it did occur to me that they've essentially reproduced the First Person Shooter -- what dedicated player hasn't "ducked" away from incoming fire, or tried to peer around the corner of the monitor when trying to see around a corner?? Same behaviour, really -- putting yourself in the place of your onscreen avatar's viewpoint to the point that you lose track of which body you actually inhabit, and react as if the avatar is real and YOU.

Re:First Person Shooter (1)

element-o.p. (939033) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005923)

I've never played many first person shooters, but my wife thinks it's rather funny to watch me lean left or right in my chair while trying to complete a tight turn in a flight simulator. Basically, the same principle.

Re:First Person Shooter (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005973)

Mirror Edge could be a good game to continu their works...

Re:First Person Shooter (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26006307)

uhh. I may have been playing Left 4 Dead the other day, and I may have almost swung my arm at my monitor when a zombie latched onto me.

Its also interesting how sometimes your stomach sort of jumps when you leap off a ledge in a game to a bloody death, similar to landing in a plane.

Re:First Person Shooter (1)

JeanBaptiste (537955) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006309)

I don't even think it takes that level of immersion.

I used to lean in various ways while playing super mario bros on the original nintendo, without even noticing that I was doing it until I leaned too far or something. Trying to make him jump just that little bit farther. Noticed other people doing it too, without being aware of it.

My dad was a professional bowler. I'd see him 'become' the ball, trying to affect it's motion far after it left his hand. But on a sub-conscious level. I doubt he was at all aware of his body language.

I've done quite the same as parent mentions playing battlefield2 and whatnot, but also think the above examples fall into the same category. I don't think it requires a first-person-shooter level of immersion.

Re:First Person Shooter (1)

philspear (1142299) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006421)

Same behaviour, really -- putting yourself in the place of your onscreen avatar's viewpoint to the point that you lose track of which body you actually inhabit, and react as if the avatar is real and YOU.

In soviet russia, avatar in first person shooter IS YOU!

Sorry, that was mostly uncalled for.

Not exactly like TV (4, Interesting)

mcgrew (92797) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005589)

I just glanced through the study's report, and will read in detail later (it's rather long). There was an episode of The Prisoner [wikipedia.org] where a scientist had a gizmo with funny metal hats that transferred consciousness [wikipedia.org] to another person.

This is nothing like that.

There was another episode that was like that. In The Schizoid Man [wikipedia.org], as Wikipedia puts it, "Number Two replaces Number Six with a duplicate to weaken the real Six's sense of identity." Not exactly like this study, but closer.

In this real-world study, one of the tests was that the subject is stimulated exactly like the "double"; the subject's abdomen is tickled exactly like the other person's body. I suspect that hypnosis plays a part in it, even if the researchers weren't aware they were hypnotizing the subject.

You can hypnotize someone by (IIRC) having them lay on their backs with their eyes closed, and lightly touch their forehead. Ask "do you feel that?" Do this three or four times and without touching their forehead, if you ask if you did they will still say "yes".

"There are four lights!" -Captain Picard

Re:Not exactly like TV (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005943)

It's not just simultaneous stimulation. The subject also has on a headset so that they are seeing through the camera eyes of the mannequin. Or in the case of two humans, one human is wearing a camera headset, the other is seeing what the camera sees.

Re:Not exactly like TV (3, Interesting)

Zerth (26112) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006177)

I'm suprised this is news. Wasn't there just recently an article about the set of nerves that fire the same when seeing someone else perform an action as doing it yourself?

Heck, I imagine anyone who has worked with waldos/tele-operated robotics has felt a sense of transference to the mechanical portion. After using a waldo for several hours a day for a few weeks, I swear I developed a sense of touch in a device with no force feedback, but it was most likely just my sympathetic reaction to seeing the waldo come into contact.

Sensationalism at its best. (1)

MaWeiTao (908546) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005603)

Talk about sensational headlines. The headline builds up considerable excitement then the very first line of the article squashes it completely.

I don't think it's a surprise that a person can be convinced to believe pretty much anything. I have a hard time believing how this research actually reveals any new insight.

Re:Sensationalism at its best. (2, Insightful)

tgd (2822) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005703)

Its actually important research where cognitive science is involved -- the precise mechanism that translates from a set of impulses entering the brain to the sense of self and awareness of both position and body isn't well understood.

We know, sure, that the world we live in is a mental projection that our brains assemble from a lot of, frankly, very coarse and non-specific input. We mentally fill in a lot of details. Figuring out how much you have to simulate to cause perception to switch is important, as it gives clues as to what the actual triggers are that lead to a sense of self.

not that surprising (-1, Redundant)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005609)

I tend to feel at home inside the body of someone of the opposite sex.

Cyborg (1)

Chatterton (228704) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005653)

Now that these scientists resolved the question of adaptability of the human psyche. Some must work on preserving the brain functionality over time and some other must work to develop the perfect cyborg container for it !!!!

Finally i will be Immortal !

Re:Cyborg (1)

mcgrew (92797) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006515)

some other must work to develop the perfect cyborg container for it !!!!

You don't have to replace the whole body, just the nonfunctional parts. There are already lots of cyborgs. My CrystaLens implant makes me a cyborg (I went from 20/400 vision to better than 20/20 in the eye with the implant), anybody with a pacemaker or an artificial hip or other joint is a cyborg.

They're not likely to come up with replacements for most organs any time soon. So you're going to need your complete head and most of your guts.

Perspective swapping, not mind swapping. (4, Insightful)

RyanFenton (230700) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005671)

There's an important distinction here - this is not mind copying, it's just perspective swapping. Mind copying would be if you were able to copy the bits of one mind in one bit of hardware (example: brain) to another bit of hardware (example: computer disk), then be able to have the mind run somewhere else. What we have here is perceptive swapping, where you just overlay a new perspective in place of a brain's inputs/outputs, giving the limited sensory perception of acting in another place to that brain's mind.

It's cool that we're making new ways for people to get new perspectives, but this ain't mind swapping by a long shot.

Ryan Fenton

Re:Perspective swapping, not mind swapping. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005873)

For that matter, Mirror's Edge, for all its brevity, does this better than any game I've seen. For the length of a run, Faith's body is your body.

If there was more physical feedback, the experience would be terrifying -- since much of it involves falling from 30 stories up.

Re:Perspective swapping, not mind swapping. (1)

andrewd18 (989408) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006487)

Mind copying would be if you were able to copy the bits of one mind in one bit of hardware (example: brain) to another bit of hardware (example: computer disk), then be able to have the mind run somewhere else.

I'm sorry, I don't quite get that analogy. Can you phrase it in terms of automobiles?

Re:Perspective swapping, not mind swapping. (1)

cylcyl (144755) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006593)

Well, if both parties change perspectives and are able to control the other body's action, wouldn't it be effectively the same as mind swapping? So, we have half the equation, we just need remote control now.

Aperture Science (5, Funny)

KumquatOfSolace (1412203) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005687)

"It did not work when a non-humanoid object -- such as a chair or large block -- was used."

No hope for test subjects who over-identify with Weighted Companion Cube.

Re:Aperture Science (1)

vux984 (928602) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006205)

No hope for test subjects who over-identify with Weighted Companion Cube.

I apparently incinerated mine with the least hesitation ever recorded!

Adult Entertainment Aplications (-1, Redundant)

Thaco (1409345) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005749)

Imagine how this could be used for porn and adult entertainment. That's a bit creepy eh?

Good paper writing skills.. (1)

Fireonyx (1417481) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005783)

Don't you remember way back when, when you had to write papers? How the first paragraph is suppose to draw you in and give people a reason to keep reading it? Same thing here.. And it is more of a proof of concept. Can the mind accept another host instead of the body it is currently in or would it reject that body due to unfamiliar environs or even perhaps intrinsically know that the mannequin/other body is a fake? It seems the mind is pre-wired to accept this kind of situation. It is not a body-swap yet, but is just one step on a long road to body-swapping.

So I posted this story to the discordian forum.. (1)

telarus (776400) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005795)

I posted this story to the discordian forum yesterday morning. One of the first things to be brought up was what a great advancement this will be for the teledildonics industry.

I guess that's what you get in a crowded room full of Popes. I'm glad most of us don't wear the hat all the time, that would be creepy.

The following is commentary on the OP story.

Quote from: LMNO on Today at 07:16:33 AM
I think that one of the most important aspects of Discordia (and the BIP[Black Iron Prison narrative]) is to constantly remind ourselves that we are always fooling ourselves as to what's "really out there". Always.
ALL THE TIME.

EVEN RIGHT NOW.

Quote from:Iptuous on Today at 07:23:08 AM
Fooling ourselves?
or, just limited in scope as to our perception of it?

Quote from: LMNO on Today at 07:24:24 AM
If it was just limited perception, we would see the gaps.

We make shit up to create a cohesive worldview.

Often, the shit we make up has nothing to do with anything.

Sensationalism (1)

leonbloy (812294) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005857)

The title of the paper is just: "Perceptual Illusion of Body Swapping". It only remains to traverse the small gap from "illusion" to "fact" to render the title at Slashdot (and at the Washington Post) true.
In other news: a person was triggered to have the illusion of having been transported to Jupiter. Hence, the sentence "A man was trasported to Jupiter" should be considered -at least approximately- true.
The experiment might be of interest, I don't dispute that; but come on. Wake me up when the "swapped mind" is able to command the other body.

at home? (0, Redundant)

lofoforabr (751004) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005889)

> even feeling at home in the body of someone of the opposite sex

I normally feel very very at home *in* the body of someone of the opposite sex :)

Re:at home? (1)

Jimmy King (828214) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006559)

Related to this and the story, when I see someone of the opposite sex being sexually stimulated, I too tend to orgasm. It's amazing!

Seriously kinky (0, Offtopic)

mi (197448) | more than 5 years ago | (#26005903)

and even feeling at home in the body of someone of the opposite sex.

After reading this I felt a hard-on, but then realized, it was my labia moistening... Oh, wait...

The technology (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26005991)

I like many people here was expecting to read an article describing some sort of elaborate brain scanning high technology. I, unlike most people posting so far, find it absolutely remarkable that the technology used to achieve this successful illusion was no more that sticks and cameras.

This arguably simple achievement gives great insight into, and offers new debatable material for the murky subject of the mind\body relationship - which in itself may boil down to an illusion no more simple or complex than what we have been shown here.

Over-reaching headline (4, Funny)

frenchgates (531731) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006003)

On April fools day they should run only stories that would exist in a comic book world. The ones we slashdotters keep waiting for...

"Scientist successfully places human brain in Ape"
"Safe and inexpensive teleportation now available"

Lame sex joke #3405 (0, Troll)

Quiet_Desperation (858215) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006083)

even feeling at home in the body of someone of the opposite sex

Feel at home? I'd never move out!

Key word here is feel.

Yeah, yeah. The low road.

Soul migration? Nah.... (2, Insightful)

Twinbee (767046) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006189)

Quote from the article:

The researchers created the illusion of body-swapping by touching the stomach of both the mannequin and the volunteer with sticks

What would have been far more interesting is if they achieved the same sensation without poking the participant as well. But even then, that could be be achieved with hypnosis anyway (?)

Its called empathy... (2, Interesting)

denzacar (181829) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006233)

Nothing mythical, mysterious or mind blowing about it.
The humans in the test are simply percepting something they see done to another as done to themselves.
Its not even psychological - its neurological.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Empathy#The_development_of_empathy [wikipedia.org]

The study of the neural underpinnings of empathy has received increased interest following the target paper published by Preston and De Waal,[39] following the discovery of mirror neurons in monkeys that fire both when the creature watches another perform an action as well as when they themselves perform it.
In their paper, they argued that 'attended perception of the object's state automatically activates neural representations, and that this activation automatically primes or generate the associated autonomic and somatic responses, unless inhibited.

That is also why "it did not work when a non-humanoid object -- such as a chair or large block -- was used."
You can't empathize with a block of wood.

Unless it is in a form of a Weighted Companion Cube.

Re:Its called empathy... (1)

philspear (1142299) | more than 5 years ago | (#26006551)

Nothing mysterious about it eh? Have everything about empathy already figured out do we? Even if we knew about this before, it's still a fairly strange application of a strange phenomena, in my book.

I'm so GlaD!!!!! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26006571)

This was a triumph.

I'm making a note here, huge success.

It's hard to overstate my satisfaction.

Aperture Science.

We do what we must, because we can...

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