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Bratz Dolls May Give Young Girls Unrealistic Expectations Of Head Size

samzenpus posted more than 5 years ago | from the sending-the-wrong-message dept.

Idle 24

If one of these dolls were human sized, the circumference of her head would be five and a half feet.

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24 comments

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Almost funny (1)

sanso999 (997008) | more than 5 years ago | (#26536139)

Not sure why, but the "hammer to the head" idea in the video makes the whole story lose whatever funny it had. Maybe it's just me and over-over-over-dramatization.

Re:Almost funny (1)

ebuck (585470) | more than 5 years ago | (#26542873)

Well, that's the Onion. Satire doesn't cut it when you break form halfway through through the joke. Personally, I was laughing so hard that I think I might have a swollen neck, which will probably make my head look even smaller.

Also I love the auto recall at the end of the piece, airbags that could deploy mid-blowjob are a menace to everyone.

Re:Almost funny (1)

Straker Skunk (16970) | more than 5 years ago | (#26571661)

Yeah, I thought so too---quite a slip for the Onion's usual pitch-perfect satire.

They should have gone with something like, "One day, I found her staring at herself in the mirror, wearing her older brother's football helmet..."

WTF??!? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26537307)

Society is focused on women's *head* size? What about the more uh, traditional body parts.

The saddest thing I ever saw (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26541065)

Forget about Iraq, homeless people, cancer, civil wars in Africa that are taking decades to finish, AIDS, George Bush, September 11th. Girls wishing to have skull implants really make my cry my eyes out. Sorry.... Im getting too emotional... I should stop writing now... Yes, somethings are just too hard to look at.

head size (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26543663)

yea cause girls that ugly are never ganna get the big cock.

oh THAT head size...

Hammer jokes (1)

Derrike (1386721) | more than 5 years ago | (#26556773)

I love how the Onion hits so many nails on the head (It's kinda hard not to hit a nail while wielding a hammer) but in the same, I'm distraught by how many people manage to completely miss the honest satire it provides.

Re:Hammer jokes (1)

MyLongNickName (822545) | more than 5 years ago | (#26558703)

Maybe it is a function of age. After having read the Onion online for years, you start to see the same formula applied to articles over and over. it almost becomes predictable. There are very few "original" ideas. I think the same thing with Saturday Night Live.

And if Slashdot is supposedly a techie site, why can't they fix the 1.5" wide comment box?

Re:Hammer jokes (2, Insightful)

lysergic.acid (845423) | more than 5 years ago | (#26595285)

And if Slashdot is supposedly a techie site, why can't they fix the 1.5" wide comment box?

i think it's a test. if you're a real nerd, then you should be able to whip up a greasemonkey script to fix the idle section's fucked-up fucked-upped-ness.

that includes the iPhone-sized textarea, as well the annoying way that pressing the "Reply to This" button causes the "Parent" button and all of the content after it to shift down about 5 pixels.

Re:Hammer jokes (1)

Fulcrum of Evil (560260) | more than 5 years ago | (#26700627)

I think the same thing with Saturday Night Live.

No, SNL just sucks. The stuff with Steve Martin is still funny 20 years later. Current stuff, not so much.

And Anime (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26599167)

Gives Otaku unrelalistic expectations of Eye Size, Hair Color, and tentacles. Lulz I' am the 5, funny now -1, troll me from your r00ted debian box with your ssh links!

Trolls, telling virgin linux zealots the truth every year on the desktop!

Ugh, sucky video player (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26601063)

Something is wrong with that Flash video player. It eats memory until the kernel kills Firefox.

Fucked up a database import I had been running for 3 days too.

The player tried to eat all 8 GB of RAM on the machine, WTF!

Re:Ugh, sucky video player (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26611097)

Something is wrong with that Flash video player. It eats memory until the kernel kills Firefox.

Fucked up a database import I had been running for 3 days too.

The player tried to eat all 8 GB of RAM on the machine, WTF!

You fail at... everything.

Re:Ugh, sucky video player (1)

spazdor (902907) | more than 4 years ago | (#26670391)

Let's recap. Your browser allowed an inline plugin to runaway with the RAM, your kernel somehow failed to prevent the browser malfunction from fucking up a completely different process on your computer, and you're blaming the video app itself?

why the heads? (3, Insightful)

MorePower (581188) | more than 5 years ago | (#26605657)

What if the heads are perfectly normal sized and they just have ridiculously small bodies?

Re:why the heads? (1)

Arrakis Dv8r (1448299) | more than 4 years ago | (#26680273)

Ahh, you're one of them.. Not glass if half full, or half empty.. You're a 'Glass is incorrectly designed for the amount of liquid it currently holds' sort of people.

Re:why the heads? (1)

jonbryce (703250) | more than 5 years ago | (#26685315)

And what if they have ridiculously small heads and even more ridiculously small bodies? And normal sized eyes.

Re:why the heads? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26687283)

hello
i want see you.
ID:hamedourmaz

Re:why the heads? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26701227)

This has generally been my assumption. The push to size zero has been oppressive. Of course this could be satire. No matter how tiny you make your body, your head will still be too big. Maybe it is time to try binding.

She's got a head like a.... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26635991)

Horse... Dog... Pig... Ape... Bratz Doll... lol women might actually take the bratz doll comment as a compliment if this story has any truth....

Re: (1)

clint999 (1277046) | more than 5 years ago | (#26687199)

Maybe it is a function of age. After having read the Onion online for years, you start to see the same formula applied to articles over and over. it almost becomes predictable. There are very few "original" ideas. I think the same thing with Saturday Night Live.And if Slashdot is supposedly a techie site, why can't they fix the 1.5" wide comment box?

Bratz is nothing (1)

tepples (727027) | more than 5 years ago | (#26688455)

Bratz is nothing. If you want to see big-headed dolls, look at Sam Butcher's Precious Moments [youtube.com] or Fisher-Price's Little People [youtube.com] or Nintendo's Smash Bros. [youtube.com]

so? (1)

dagarath (33684) | more than 5 years ago | (#26695231)

And plastic surgery is giving young girls appropriate expectations for any number of body parts?

Re:so? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#26715759)

Congratulations on spelling out the joke. A complementary ham is winging its way to you as we speak.

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