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Spider Bite Allows Man To Walk Again

samzenpus posted more than 5 years ago | from the web-slinger dept.

Medicine 221

Manastorm writes "A man who was wheelchair bound due to a motorcycle accident twenty years ago gained the ability to walk again after being bitten by a recluse spider. 'I can't wait to start dancing,' he said as he looks forward to a full recovery after experiencing what some call a 'true miracle.'" I think we all know how this story is going to end. I hope The Sinister Six have been practicing.

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221 comments

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No radioactivity involved? (4, Funny)

R2.0 (532027) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231335)

No genetic engineering?

What a let down...

Re:No radioactivity involved? (5, Funny)

phantomfive (622387) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231615)

You never know. They didn't catch the spider, and it happened in Manteca, California, which is far outside the normal range of the brown recluse spider. However, it is in unusually close proximity to Sutter Buttes, an extinct volcano which would be an ideal place to set up a secret lab for.........experiments. Not that I'm suggesting anything.

Re:No radioactivity involved? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27231833)

No, no, no! A proper evil overlord hideout requires liquid hot magma. A dormant volcano simply won't do.

Re:No radioactivity involved? (3, Insightful)

tacarat (696339) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233799)

No, no, no! A proper evil overlord hideout requires liquid hot magma. A dormant volcano simply won't do.

It only appears dormant as the evil genius has been tapping it to geothermically power various projects. Should somebody in spandex or an impeccable tux come in unexpectedly...

Re:No radioactivity involved? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27231867)

There is an old missile silo complex at the base of the Sutter Buttes - perfect for a secret lab.

Re:No radioactivity involved? (5, Funny)

kbob88 (951258) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231907)

Repeat after me: there is no secret lab under Sutter Buttes. Certainly not one exactly 322' under Brockman Canyon off Pass Road with henchmen wearing shiny silver suits where several tanks of Sphyrna have recently been delivered. Umm, I mean, these are not the buttes you are looking for...

Re:No radioactivity involved? (2, Interesting)

Creepy (93888) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233409)

Location doesn't mean much - a friend of mine's mom got bitten by a likely brown recluse spider in central Minnesota (about 400 miles north of their habitat) and they never caught that spider, either, but the venom was necrotic which is a fairly good identifier. It is suspected that the spider hitchhiked a ride with fruit.

Anyhow, it is very unlikely that this was related due to the nature of that venom - sounds like he went to the hospital and they likely found nerve regrowth or something like that. Nerves do regrow (when I was a kid I heard they didn't, but that was proven wrong), but nerve regrowth is rare in the spine because spinal fluids prohibit it.

Re:No radioactivity involved? (1)

Shakrai (717556) | more than 5 years ago | (#27234501)

but nerve regrowth is rare in the spine because spinal fluids prohibit it.

Guess our intelligent designer needs to go back to the drawing board if (s)he built in a design flaw like that ;)

Re:No radioactivity involved? (5, Funny)

Walt Dismal (534799) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232399)

I was bitten by a C# bug and now I can spin .NETs. However, my arch-nemesis is Doctor Oct-Torvalds, who has eight tentacle arms powered by a small open-source nuclear reactor.

First person to make... (5, Funny)

Em Emalb (452530) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231339)

a spiderman analogy gets beaten about the head, neck, chest, and shoulders with a rocket-propelled spaghetti launcher.

Re:First person to make... (4, Funny)

neoform (551705) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231375)

Forget dancing! He can't wait to climb walls, sling webs and catch Dr. Oct!

Re:First person to make... (1)

jd (1658) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231607)

What? He already is! You missed that part of the article?

that will be tough (1)

Kludge (13653) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231409)

All the comments to this article will be spiderman analogies.

Re:that will be tough (1)

garaged (579941) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233827)

oh, no

There is plenty of room for austin powers analogies here

Myth busters episode (5, Funny)

syousef (465911) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231483)

I'm waiting for the Mythbuster's episode. First we hobble Adam, Jamie and Grant (who can be the control). Then we inject them all with deadly spider venom. If they survive, we see if the spider venom helps them to walk again. Grant gets no venom. Whether they survive or not, it's entertaining and about as scientific as the rest of their testing.

Re:Myth busters episode (4, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27231641)

I'm waiting for the Mythbuster's episode.

It was an exploding spider?

Re:Myth busters episode (1)

Mistshadow2k4 (748958) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231859)

This exactly why the original poster's suggestion would never work as a Mythbuster's episode: with nothing to blow up, there is no episode.

Re:Myth busters episode (4, Funny)

PIBM (588930) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232939)

They can blow up the corpses after they die of the poison ..

Re:Myth busters episode (1)

Kleen13 (1006327) | more than 5 years ago | (#27234227)

I'm sure Adam & Jamie could figure out a way to burn something.....

Re:Myth busters episode (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27232963)

To be fair, we should hobble all of them and then have them bitten by a wide assortment of spiders, just to make sure only the recluse will induce nerve regeneration.

Re:Myth busters episode (1)

FatdogHaiku (978357) | more than 5 years ago | (#27234457)

I'm waiting for the Mythbuster's episode. First we hobble Adam, Jamie and Grant (who can be the control). Then we inject them all with deadly spider venom. If they survive, we see if the spider venom helps them to walk again. Grant gets no venom. Whether they survive or not, it's entertaining and about as scientific as the rest of their testing.

+1 Hilariously Accurate

Re:Myth busters episode (1)

Slumdog (1460213) | more than 5 years ago | (#27234481)

I think we're missing the point. Its the spider that should the centre of our attention, tired of people bashing spiderman as impossible and tired of the public's scepticism of spiders, one spider took it upon itself to show that world, that indeed spiders can create superheroes. They just don't want to.
That could be a myth though.

Screw spiderman... (5, Funny)

JCSoRocks (1142053) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233473)

Let's get this thing to bite a pig!

SPIDER PIG
SPIDER PIG
Does whatever a SPIDER PIG does
Can he swing
From a web
No he cant
He's a pig
LOOK OOOUUUTTT!!!!
He is a SPIDER PIG!!

You're welcome for getting that stuck in your head for the rest of the day...

What a misleading headline (5, Informative)

jandrese (485) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231365)

For those of you who are thinking that deadly spider poison is some sort of elixir of mobility I have some bad news. Basically what happened is that he got sent to the hospital and the doctors noticed that his legs were in better shape than he thought, and with some physical therapy he was able to get them working again.

Re:What a misleading headline (1)

internerdj (1319281) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231427)

and summary... but a geek can dream.

Re:What a misleading headline (5, Funny)

Red Flayer (890720) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231481)

Fucking spoilsport.Why can't you let us enjoy our adolescent fantasies of possible superheroism for a little longer?

I bet you spend the month of December telling little kids at the mall that Santa's a hoax. Miserable bastard.

Re:What a misleading headline (2, Interesting)

TheRealMindChild (743925) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231527)

You are completely oversimplifying the article to the point where your statement is misleading. This man hasn't been able to walk in 20 YEARS. This isn't a case of some guy not putting forth the effort. The nurse noticed movement in his leg that hasn't been seen in this man, during the time he was in for treatment of the spider bite. They administered THE SAME TESTS this man has taken before with no results and he was able to FEEL something... which he COULDN'T do before.

My guess is, spider venom is a nerve toxin... it just so happened to manipulate the biology of these nerves in the same way a swift kick to the TV used to fix bad reception.

Re:What a misleading headline (5, Insightful)

SatanicPuppy (611928) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232219)

Brown Recluse venom isn't neurotoxic, it's necrotic. If his legs rotted and fell off, I'd think it was possibly due to a bite from a brown recluse. Starting to work again? Doesn't sound likely.

I would think it is equally plausible that he fell and it knocked something back into alignment, or he's been showing a long term improvement that wasn't quite to the detection threshold before.

Attributing the improvement to the spider bite is very thin.

Still an execellant medical solution . . . (2, Funny)

PolygamousRanchKid (1290638) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232877)

Brown Recluse venom isn't neurotoxic, it's necrotic.

. . . for my family's great aunt's mobility problem: She can't move an inch without telling everyone in earshot, who doesn't want to hear, a complete medical history of her bowels and various other organs.

If I can convince her that a bunch of spider bites are the solution to her real and imagined medical problems, that should have that problem sorted.

Maybe AIG should give these spiders out, instead of bonuses?

Re:What a misleading headline (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27233219)

More than likely what happened is a case of modern and competent doctors.

Back in the early 90's, they didnt know as much about rehabilitation as they do now.

Re:What a misleading headline (1)

drunkenoafoffofb3ta (1262668) | more than 5 years ago | (#27234101)

My hypothesis when this was posted on Digg a few days ago was that the magic of the immune system was at play. Venom causes an immune response; immune system fights the nasties; post-immune response repairs some of the damage. But after reading jandrese's comment above... methinks he's right.

Re:What a misleading headline (5, Insightful)

vux984 (928602) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232257)

You are completely oversimplifying the article to the point where your statement is misleading.

And you are making almost absurd leaps of logic.

They administered THE SAME TESTS this man has taken before with no results and he was able to FEEL something... which he COULDN'T do before.

Yes.

My guess is, spider venom is a nerve toxin... it just so happened to manipulate the biology of these nerves in the same way a swift kick to the TV used to fix bad reception.

Er. No. As you said, he hadn't been able to walk for 20 years. And he'd been in rehab previously with no success. While the article doesn't say, odds are it was a number of years since he'd last been in rehab.

In reality land, nerve damage heals very slowly.

I had a wisdom tooth extracted a couple years ago, and the procedure paralyzed a small strip on lip and chin. My mouth healed up nicely within a few weeks. The paralysis took almost a year. The doctor had warned paralysis was a possibility, that if it occurred it would take a long time to heal, and that there was a good chance it wouldn't heal at all. After six months it went from dead to 'tingling' when touched (sort of like the shooting sparks you get when your foot falls asleep), a few months later and it was healed.

All the spider bite likely did is cause him to be in the hospital, where he was re-tested. If he'd gone in without the spider bite, he would almost certainly have had the same result. In the interval between the last test and the current one, the nerves had healed to the point they would carry signals again.

After decades of no success, you don't go in to try every six months 'just in case'.

The odds the spider bite had anything whatsoever to do with it is minimal.

My guess is, spider venom is a nerve toxin.

Except that the Recluse spider venom isn't particularly neuro-toxic at all. Its primary toxin simply aggregates platelets and white blood cells to clog capillaries, which causes necrotic flesh wounds. Rarely is the venom carried by the blood stream further. The main risk is that the necrotic flesh becomes a breeding ground for 2ndary infections. Its really more like gangrene than anything else.

Re:What a misleading headline (2, Funny)

Pollardito (781263) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233717)

Except that the Recluse spider venom isn't particularly neuro-toxic at all. Its primary toxin simply aggregates platelets and white blood cells to clog capillaries, which causes necrotic flesh wounds.

well maybe it worked like that BEFORE the spider got zapped with high energy gamma rays, but afterwards things were probably a bit different

Re:What a misleading headline (4, Informative)

sjames (1099) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232437)

Actually, recluse venom is cytotoxic rather than neurotoxic. In the majority of cases, it causes nothing more than aches and a bit of feaver. In the minority of cases, it will cause a nasty necrotic ulcer local to the bite. Even rarer, the effects are diffuse and systemic causing various organ damage.

It's hard to see where the bite would help, but if it did (that is, not a coincidence), I'd have to guess (and it's a wild guess) that it broke up scar tissue that was blocking healing in the nerves.

Re:What a misleading headline (0, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27232701)

And we, of course, know everything about biochemistry and can prove that the chemical pathways involved in his cure are in no way related to the brown recluse spider toxin.

Your thinking is misguded. While science is the best we have, to believe that current science encompasses all knowledge is a very serious error. Shakespeare has something to say on the subject:

Horatio: O day and night, but this is wondrous strange!

Hamlet: And therefore as a stranger give it welcome.
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

Re:What a misleading headline (4, Insightful)

Rary (566291) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233189)

And we, of course, know everything about biochemistry...

No, but we do know quite a bit.

...and can prove that the chemical pathways involved in his cure are in no way related to the brown recluse spider toxin.

No, but we can apply a little logic and a liberal dose of Occam's Razor and come to a reasonable conclusion. "Magical spider bite cures paralysis" is not that reasonable conclusion.

Re:What a misleading headline (3, Insightful)

CrashPoint (564165) | more than 5 years ago | (#27234197)

And we, of course, know everything about biochemistry and can prove that the chemical pathways involved in his cure are in no way related to the brown recluse spider toxin.

The phrase "burden of proof" is something with which you might want to familiarize yourself.

Re:What a misleading headline (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27231543)

This just in: Spider bite cures laziness!

Re:What a misleading headline (5, Funny)

interkin3tic (1469267) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231569)

You think you're so smart, but I haven't RTFA. Therefore I don't know if you're lying or not, therefore in my world, this man MAY be spiderman.

I live in a world where spiderman is possibly real, along with santa and the easter bunny. All you have is stupid reality.

Missing the point (5, Funny)

jd (1658) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231769)

What's wrong with Santa? We know St. Nick was real (so we know there are charitable people) and we know wormholes are real (so we know how to travel around the globe in an evening).

The Easter Bunny is a modern corruption of the Eostre hare, which seems to have involved throwing eggs at Bugs in the morning, or something like that.

Spider threads are one of the strongest organic materials known. If we assume the thread could be scaled to the thickness of a typical hemp rope and that the strength scaled with it, it might just about be strong enough to pull building over with, never mind scaling them.

It's not about these superheros not being possible - clearly the science says otherwise. It's about them not having happened yet. Which, since the tales all come from the past, means time travel will have to be invented along with them.

Yes. Intentionally. (1)

interkin3tic (1469267) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232197)

It's not about these superheros not being possible - clearly the science says otherwise. It's about them not having happened yet. Which, since the tales all come from the past, means time travel will have to be invented along with them.

Woosh. Really? Spiderman ISN'T real? Why haven't I read about this on slashdot before?

Re:Yes. Intentionally. (1)

jd (1658) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232309)

*blink*

You mean, you took my post seriously, even after suggesting Easter was based on throwing eggs at a cartoon character?

I think there is indeed a whoosh here, but I don't think it's anything going over my head.

Re:Yes. Intentionally. (1)

interkin3tic (1469267) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232915)

Aha! You took my post taking your post seriously seriously!?! Wooshmate!

Actually, yeah, I did. To my credit, I thought you meant bugs as in insects, not Bugs Bunny. Capitalization should have given it away. While that doesn't make any more sense, it at least sounds more believable that someone would actually think that.

Re:Yes. Intentionally. (1)

Wain13001 (1119071) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233335)

I read it as insects as well.

Re:Yes. Intentionally. (2, Funny)

Faluzeer (583626) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232957)

Woosh. Really? Spiderman ISN'T real? Why haven't I read about this on slashdot before?

Do you filter out articles posted by kdawson?

Re:Missing the point (1)

maxume (22995) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233779)

If we assume magic, I could fly.

Re:What a misleading headline (4, Funny)

Moebius Loop (135536) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233415)

Of course. From the time the article is published until the point in time that you read the article, this man is juxtaposed between the state of BEING Spiderman, and the state of NOT BEING Spiderman.

This is an excellent a thought experiment that illustrates the problems with the Copenhagen interpretation of Quantum Commenting.

Re:What a misleading headline (3, Funny)

Nefarious Wheel (628136) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233785)

this man is juxtaposed between the state of BEING Spiderman, and the state of NOT BEING Spiderman.

Schrodinger's Bug?

Re:What a misleading headline (0)

the_B0fh (208483) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231575)

But, based on this: http://cbs13.com/watercooler/Paraplegic.Man.Suffers.2.960606.html [cbs13.com]

he walked after *5* days of physical therapy. *Your* summary is misleading too. 5 days to walk is a miracle.

Re:What a misleading headline (1)

jandrese (485) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231645)

The article said 8 months, not 5 days.

Re:What a misleading headline (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27231583)

Welcome to SlashDigg.

Re:What a misleading headline (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27232033)

Your summary is also very misleading! Please recognized that what you wrote is opinion and not fact! None knows if the spider bite played any part in his recovery. He got bit by a spider, went to the hospital and was being rehabed for 8 months when they recognized slight leg spasm. Note, this was not his first extensive rehab or the first test on his nerves. Earlier, similar test, rendered his nerves dead.

Now they are saying that his nerves weren't dead; they were asleep and now something woke them up.

The spider had absolutely no effect on this? Are you sure?

Re:What a misleading headline (4, Insightful)

spacefiddle (620205) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232085)

Marvelous. One wonders if his damage was gradually regenerating all this time and is now detectable; or if, perhaps, he could have been rehabilitated to walk 20 years ago, had he been someone with more money than a tattoo artist / physical laborer.

Re:What a misleading headline- I'LL SAY! (4, Interesting)

rMortyH (40227) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233235)

Most interesting, is there are NO BROWN RECLUSE SPIDERS IN CALIFORNIA!

People will argue that there are, and they know someone whose been bitten, but loxosceles reclusa has only been found a handful of times in California in the last 50 years, all of the cases were isolated, and all were traced to shipments from outside the state. (great page from UC Berkeley prof on this that I can't find now...)

A south american recluse has been spotted in the LA area but is not thought to be established.

There are certainly NONE of these in Manteca.

I can tell you though, that although there are none in San Francisco, people will argue that there are to the point of absurdity, so this is a sort of pet subject of mine about how people are wrong.

However, there are so many Black Widows in the Manteca area that you can find several on a twenty minute walk if you're looking for them. Also, Black widow venom IS a neurotoxin, where recluse venom is not. There are also plenty of scorpions and biting centipedes in the area, but no recluses.

Also, in cases where brown recluse IS confirmed, even in one case of large numbers of them in a family home, there were no bites. They're very rare, and necrosis from a CONFIRMED bite is very rare as well.

Most of what you hear about poisonous spiders, even 'first hand accounts', are simply myths. Real brown recluses and black widows are just not very dangerous to healthy adults, and the brown recluses simply does not exist in most places where people claim to have seen them or claim to have been bitten.

I'm most fascinated by the passion with which people will argue against this, even though it can be confirmed just by checking a few books!

=rmortyh

Re:What a misleading headline- I'LL SAY! (1)

BoogeyOfTheMan (1256002) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233445)

You kind of contradicted yourself there. You said there are accounts of the bugs being imported. Just because its imported doesnt mean it wasnt there and didnt bite someone.

There are numerous insects that arent native that you can find small colonies of living for a few generations before they die off all over the world.

Polar bears arent native to southern Alaska, but that doesnt mean you wont find someone getting bitten by one in a major city.

maybe not..and not so fast (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27233277)

You are assuming as fact that which is not in the article. There isn't quite enough data in the news article to make a determination yet if there might be any linkage. He had been under doctors care and in rehab before with no hope or any progress. We do not know how extensive his diagnosis was previous to the new hospital stay from the spider bite to determine if he had regained nerve function or not *previous* to the spider bite. Animal toxins have been known to help in some afflictions, for instance some bee stings or wasp stings give arthritis sufferers a little more function and lessen the pain, and they have used snake venom before for other afflictions.

Re:What a misleading headline (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27233959)

Anyone who knows what a Brown Recluse spider bite does knows it wasn't the venom of that spider. The venom of the Recluse spider is a necrotizing venom that destroys tissue, muscle and nerves, causing them to die and rot in place. The bites are often black masses of dead, dieing and rotting tissue. You aren't going to get a mircle fix from a venom that acts like long life acid in destroying tissue. I'm sure there are other spiders that have unusual venoms that could have such impacts on the nervous system in the small doses humans usually receive (as opposed to their normal prey), the brown recluse is not one. As I said initially, anyone that knows the brown recluse would never believe it's venom could make someone walk again.

Re:What a misleading headline (1)

FiloEleven (602040) | more than 5 years ago | (#27234319)

Duly noted and tagged "idlenotscience"

Re:What a misleading headline (1)

phillips321 (955784) | more than 5 years ago | (#27234393)

Thank god someone as well as me Read the Fucking Article [rtfa.co.uk]

Yeah ... (0, Redundant)

NotBornYesterday (1093817) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231385)

but can he walk up walls?

A different sort of miracle. (5, Informative)

Guppy (12314) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231467)

The article is mis-leading, it sounds as if some biochemical trick of the spider venom mysteriously un-paralyzed him. The actual situation sounds rather more ordinary.

From what I can tell, the spider bite just got him into the hospital, and in contact with the right kind of doctor and rehab that got him walking again. That's a little miracle in itself there, but it's the kind of miracle of circumstance and determination -- not the sort that goes into the science section.

Re:A different sort of miracle. (1)

jd (1658) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231795)

Hyperdilution got into the science section of Nature. In comparison, this article is positively accurate.

Re:A different sort of miracle. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27233597)

If I was sitting at home in my birthday suit and a brown recluse landed in my lap and start marching toward my nuts clacking its little toxin-dripping fangs together, I'm pretty sure I'd discover new life in my legs too. Also heals mutes.

Crippleman, Crippleman. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27231477)

Your friendly neighborhood paraplegic.

And it did not take him long to get arrested eithe (4, Informative)

arkham6 (24514) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231491)

http://cbs13.com/watercooler/Paraplegic.Man.Suffers.2.960606.html

Nice.

Re:And it did not take him long to get arrested ei (2, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27232157)

Hyperlinked for the lazy like me: Man Who Walked Following Spider Bite Arrested [cbs13.com]

Re:And it did not take him long to get arrested ei (2, Funny)

psychcf (1248680) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233517)

Arrested for domestic violence? My god, this man really is spiderman!

Re:And it did not take him long to get arrested ei (1, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27233877)

...on Friday, Manteca Police arrested Blancarte on charges of contempt of court charge stemming from a domestic violence case, CBS News reported.

The moral of the story (4, Funny)

interkin3tic (1469267) | more than 5 years ago | (#27231657)

David Blancarte, 47, is on his feet for the first time since suffering major injuries in a motorcycle accident some 20 years ago...

He said he was riding on Third Street when a woman motorist made a left turn in front of him. He crashed into her vehicle and was thrown over her car and onto the pavement...

The turn-around in his condition was ironically caused by the bite of a Recluse spider that put him in a Manteca hospital for five days. Then he was transferred to the Kindred (rehabilitation) Hospital in Modesto where he stayed for five months.

Blancarte said when he was evaluated at the Modesto hospital his lifeless legs were tested â" actually electrically zapped by a doctor â" to measure nerve function. Not having been able to use his lower limbs for two decades, he was in awe to hear that his nerves were actually alive and could move them again.

The lesson here is clear: women should not drive.

Re:The moral of the story (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27231919)

If you ride a motorcycle, the greatest cause of death is a woman on a cell phone in an SUV turning or pulling out right in front of you. No joking matter.

Re:The moral of the story (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27232299)

No.
The greatest cause of death would be a nekkid woman fucking you to death while riding the motorcycle.
The biggest cause of death, however...

Re:The moral of the story (1)

SatanicPuppy (611928) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232323)

Hell, you're not much safer if you're just driving a rationally sized car. I view that combination at about the same threat level as the redneck with the high powered rifle and the 12 pack of Coors.

Both of them are treating a dangerous weapon with a casual contempt that puts other peoples lives in danger. I find that to be...irritating.

Wrong kind of spider (1)

serutan (259622) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232039)

Sounds like he needed the spider bite that lets you walk AND become invisible.

I've seen this before (1)

saiha (665337) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232069)

It is clearly ADAM at work.

holy shit! (1)

jollyreaper (513215) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232095)

Quick, somebody chase him and see if he can crawl up the wall!

It gets better! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27232165)

Now he is going to jail!

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/03/16/national/main4870337.shtml?source=mostpop_story

Recluse spiders do not live in California! (1)

JohnnyLocust (855742) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232251)

I've had this argument many times over with Californians. http://spiders.ucr.edu/myth.html [ucr.edu]

There are no populations of brown recluse spiders living in California. In case, this upsets your applecart, I repeat, there are no populations of brown recluse spiders living in California. The common name "brown recluse spider" refers to one species of spider, Loxosceles reclusa, which lives in the central Midwest: Nebraska south to Texas and eastward to southernmost Ohio and north-central Georgia (see map). Only a handful of specimens (less than 10) have ever been collected in California and usually there is some connection between the spider and a recent move or shipment from the Midwest.

When asked is he strong? (3, Funny)

Timberwolf0122 (872207) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232277)

His doctor became agitated and in formed the press

"Listen bud! He's got radioactive blood!"

Re:When asked is he strong? (1)

SoTerrified (660807) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233411)

His doctor became agitated and informed the press "Listen bud! He's got radioactive blood!"

Press question: "Can he swing from a thread?"

Wonder if... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27232505)

a recluse bite would work for erectile dysfunction

SLASHDOT?! (0)

rift321 (1358397) | more than 5 years ago | (#27232575)

Excuse me, but how the fuck did a pop-news story about some abusive ex-motorcyclist who attributed the regaining of nerve function in his lower limbs to a spider bite make it to the main page of Slashdot? I heard that Jesus' face was on a cinnamon bun again recently, and that didn't make it on here...

Re:SLASHDOT?! (2, Funny)

david_thornley (598059) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233131)

Yeah, but how many people on /. believe in Jesus as opposed to Spiderman?

Slashdot Killer: +100, Informative (0, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27232771)

I've developed a news engine that is guaranteed to put Slashdot out of business:

It's called Google News Search [google.com] .

Yours In Communism,
Kilgore Trout

Can the reporter to do some fact checking please? (1)

SoundGuyNoise (864550) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233087)

He had kept a close eye on Christopher Reeves

Christopher REEVE [imdb.com] portrayed Superman in 4 motion pictures.
George REEVES [imdb.com] played him in B&W serials and television, and was untimely portrayed by Ben Affleck.

samzenpus has done it again! (1)

Chad Birch (1222564) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233099)

C'mon samzenpus, is it really that difficult to post your crap to idle instead of slashdot's main page? I swear you screw this up at least once a week.

Bioshock (1)

zach297 (1426339) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233349)

Anyone who has played Bioshock knows were this is headed. Just replace spider with slug.

welcome! (1)

Dharh (520643) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233403)

I for one welcome our new paralysis curing recluse spider overlords.

Reporting Fail (3, Informative)

bsander (774553) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233425)

The story with a little less bullshit is here: http://www.theskepticsguide.org/sgublog/?p=519 [theskepticsguide.org]

Re:Reporting Fail (1)

LordEd (840443) | more than 5 years ago | (#27234031)

From the link:

Service Unavailable

HTTP Error 503. The service is unavailable.

I agree. This is much better.

I doubt it! (1)

Nicros (531081) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233463)

I hate misleading articles like this.

Have to say Im pretty sure this guy would have been able to walk as described sans spider bite. In fact, if he had been hospitalized several years before maybe the outcome would have been the same.

And on top of that, I doubt even more that he was bitten by a brown recluse. These are extremely rare if not nonexistant in California (http://spiders.ucr.edu/myth.html [ucr.edu] ).

And on top of THAT, what looks like a brown recluse spider bite is most often a misdiagnosed staph or other necrotic infection (http://spiders.ucr.edu/necrotic.html [ucr.edu] ).

And despite all this misinformation, probably safe to say people will believe that brown recluse spider bites are like the next stem cell technology.

This explains ... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27233819)

... the increased incidence of women placing spiders on their husbands' dicks at night.

Recluse bites are *nasty* (1)

smellsofbikes (890263) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233883)

I had a friend who was a very nice, very hippie/crystals&dolphins type. She was bitten by a brown recluse that fell on her when she was dusting in her cellar. The bite was basically between her breast and armpit. Since she didn't believe in modern medicine she put a large variety of herbs on it, slept with a crystal next to it, and watched the necrotizing eat away at her for four months, at which point she'd lost part of her breast and much of her pectoral muscle in this handball-sized crater of horribleness. She finally went to a doctor and they did surgery and removed a bunch of tissue. Less than six months later she had two lumps in the area, that were found to be breast cancer, and ended up killing her. I can't state as a fact that the bite and subsequent massive, widespread cellular damage caused it, but it's sure creepy.

Go to the nice doctor when you get a spider bite. They actually do know some useful things, and spider bites are one of them.

Re:Recluse bites are *nasty* (1)

JustNiz (692889) | more than 5 years ago | (#27233981)

>> she put a large variety of herbs on it, slept with a crystal next to it, and watched the necrotizing eat away at her for four months

My fear has been that since humanity, especially the US, is making everything even slightly potentially dangerous illegal, natural evolution no longer stands a chance. Its nice to see that mankind is finding its own ways of improving the gene pool.

Nice, but fluffy story (1)

Not_A_Jew (1363015) | more than 5 years ago | (#27234059)

This is a fantastic story, but the article is almost entirely fluff: anyone care to explain /how/ a [brown?] recluse spider bite's neurotoxic venom induces nerve growth? Just curious.

Not a Jew
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