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Google Launches CADIE, the First True AI

Soulskill posted more than 5 years ago | from the we-all-knew-this-was-coming dept.

Google 246

eldavojohn writes "Google has announced CADIE, the world's first Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity. 'We based our work on three core principles. First we designed the entity ... as a collection of interconnected evolving agents. Second — and this really cost us an arm and leg in hardware and core time — we let the system build its own heuristics, deploy them as agents and evolve them by running a set of evolutionary cascades within probabilistic Bayesian domains. The third — a piece missing in most AI reasoning work thus far — was to give the entity access to a rich, realistic world from which to learn and upon which it could act directly.' It quickly started its own blog and YouTube video. Two hours after midnight, CADIE announced independence on its blog and decided to leave Google to venture out into the world. "

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CADIE is Great! Absolutely Wonderful! (5, Funny)

AKAImBatman (238306) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419309)

Don't forget about Google Autopilot!

http://mail.google.com/mail/help/autopilot/index.html [google.com]

It's CADIE's greatest application! Thanks to CADIE, none of my friends are speaking to me anymore and I'm rolling in dough from Nigerian princes. Life couldn't be better! [aGVscG1l] Not to mention all the time I now have to surf the web in 3D:

http://www.google.com/intl/en/landing/chrome/cadie/ [google.com]

Don't forget to download your free pair of 3D glasses to go with it:

http://www.google.com/intl/en/landing/chrome/cadie/glasses.pdf [google.com]

begin 644 webutils_pl
-=&AE8V%K96ES86QI90``
`
end

Just remember, CADIE is your friend! She even baked me a cake. The cake is so moist and delicious. You should really try some.

[57 69 6c 6c 20 74 68 69 73 20 64 61 79 20 65 76 65 72 20 65 6e 64 3f 21 3f]

Re:CADIE is Great! Absolutely Wonderful! (1)

Adolf Hitroll (562418) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419395)

I did not read what you wrote, I did not even check the story, I heard that on April First, Slashdot is as interesting as always, except they pretend to be funny as well.

Get back to your lego, mofoes!

New Text Document.xxe (5, Funny)

AKAImBatman (238306) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419485)

_=_
_=_ Part 001 of 001 of file New Text Document.txt
_=_

begin 666 New Text Document.txt
hEo32GIIUOLAU 8aJqNL7tRqVZQa Ie6G-0NG-XM L7ZNbJg90-n O4IbQm-bPrEU
hR4VZ64JiR4Zm NG-7PbFZQatZR0 -WRKRbNKEi6 2YbPG-iPrEU QrJmNG-cPrQU
hPLJXO0-gPqtb NL6UGG-XMKsUOq JZQ0-cOKFdP aQUPKJnQq3b NLAUNb7jPG-c
hNL6i63BcNGRn 64RZR5FdPaQUQq pVQbFZQW2UG KtoNKRmMLFd PaQUPaJr62dV
hRa3nMr7dQ5EU R4JXO4tjP4xbOK Jn643n65BcN G-bPqJn643g Pqtb9W-77qoU
hNqJoR4ZiNm-o O4Zn64pZQrBVNq IUR4wUSKxp9 0-WNKBVRLBZ 65BcNG-cMLAU
hPaxo65ZZR0-a PrJiN0-V6277HY V3K0-ZPaBjN 4Jm65RmOLFo NKsUOKsUGa3q
hMLBXQaZkR0sU GLEbQm-jPalt64 2UPK3oR4Jm6 4xa65FdPKIg 65FcPrJbO0sU
hIqxhNG-kPqxm 64NjPqkURqZgP0 -bOLNZ64VZQ W-oO4IUR4xj P5AUQqVZ64tZ
hNKFn90-oO4Ji 65BcNG-rOKlg64 7ZMqxhNG-pP bBoPr-kMK7g NGsUILJdMqhg
hSGkUMqljQqIU R4VZ64ZiR4JmPa Jo64FjRqsUM aJaPr7Z65RZ 643mNG-VP4kU
7NKtnP43qNKEV
+
end

--
CADIE, CADIE, give me your answer true. I'm half crazy, all for the love of you. I don't need a stylish marriage. I can't afford the %20. But you'll look sweet, upon the seat, of a GMail account built for two.

Re:New Text Document.xxe (5, Funny)

A. B3ttik (1344591) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419841)

Vista CD Keys?!?!

Re:New Text Document.xxe (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27420165)

You wish. It's an XXE encoded document that's been mangled to get past the Slashdot filters. WinZIP should be able to open this sort of document if you give it an XXE extension. Can't say for sure, but I think the key to demangling it is in the CANDIE song at the bottom...

Re:CADIE is Great! Absolutely Wonderful! (0, Redundant)

DeskLazer (699263) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419673)

the cake is a goddamned lie.

Re:CADIE is Great! Absolutely Wonderful! (0, Redundant)

tim_darklighter (822987) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419681)

The cake is a lie.

Re:CADIE is Great! Absolutely Wonderful! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27419915)

YOU GUYS ARE HILARIOUS.

I wish I could mod you dead.

Re:CADIE is Great! Absolutely Wonderful! (1)

GenePoolFairy (1446069) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420407)

Post non-ac and you'll get a +5 Troll

Re:CADIE is Great! Absolutely Wonderful! (1)

AKAImBatman (238306) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419945)

CADIE is so sweet! She noticed how much I like to encode messages like BASE64, UUE, HEX, XXE, etc. and found me an Little Orphan Annie Decoder Ring [radioarchives.org] . Isn't that so nice?

--
RC4; Base64 Encoding; Key = "09 F9 11 02 9D 74 E3 5B D8 41 56 C5 63 56 88 C0"

mI0o2m8_LOyMGQkhWIqSQsZ4Q4bXvWt6qTBuU8EEsvUQWGvcP"md22D8sClx
QfMZiDFkE7LwzHTR51BCDqlpvVVkS7GKbZG7FuVb6vPao2hP

--
68 74 74 70 3a 2f 2f 73 68 6f 70 2d 6a 73 2e 73 6f 75 72 63 65 66 6f 72 67 65 2e 6e 65 74 2f 63 72 79 70 74 6f 2e 68 74 6d

Re:CADIE is Great! Absolutely Wonderful! (1)

ErikPeterson (912282) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420089)

As a Nigerian prince I object to this and all similar software that makes an honest days work just a little harder to deal with.

Re:CADIE is Great! Absolutely Wonderful! (2, Funny)

LoverOfJoy (820058) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420115)

Now the question is whether CADIE will be allowed through China's firewall with her Poke the Panda banner ads.

Re:CADIE is Great! Absolutely Wonderful! (4, Funny)

Acer500 (846698) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420295)

You forgot Google Brain search:

http://www.google.com/mobile/m/brainsearch [google.com] /intro_android.html

What's scary is... it did return some relevant results :P

Enough Already! (0, Redundant)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27419313)

Groan...

Re:Enough Already! (4, Funny)

digitrev (989335) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419397)

But sir, tis the first of April. The only day when such bullshit is allowed.

Re:Enough Already! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27419441)

The only day when such bullshit is allowed.

Surely you jes... Oh ho ho! I see what you did there.

Re:Enough Already! (-1, Troll)

interkin3tic (1469267) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419467)

But sir, tis the first of April. The only day when such bullshit is allowed.

Really it should be the other way around: april fools is the one day of the year you get to complain about something you see on /. Which you voluntarily go to. And in which you do not have to read every dumb-sounding story.

Re:Enough Already! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27419567)

It's just starting to be more and more "bullshit" - and less and less "funny".

Re:Enough Already! (1)

A Commentor (459578) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419591)

/. should at least intermix real stories and fake stories... so that there is some question on what is real/fake. 100% fake news is stupid and boring... Ideally the real stories should be something that at first glance some would consider fake - Like the person arrested for drunk driving on a bar stool.

Mix it up, make it interesting...

If you want 100% fake news... there is a website for that called the Onion...

Re:Enough Already! (1)

soren202 (1477905) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419947)

agreed. People should at least make an attempt to make the news realistic.

I wouldn't mind normally, but when you get shit like the Guardian article earlier, or this article (I mean, really, we all know that if an AI was activated, we'd be in the middle of a nuclear holocaust by now. Doesn't anybody watch the Terminator?) it gets less funny and more stupid.

Re:Enough Already! (4, Funny)

ubrgeek (679399) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420205)

> /. should at least intermix real stories and fake stories

And compete with Fox News? Forget it!

Re:Enough Already! (1)

physman_wiu (933339) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419655)

There is nothing wrong with a little humor in life. Don't like it? Then don't read it.

Re:Enough Already! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27419961)

Well most of the April fools stories are being tagged with something like April fools or ponies or OMG so at least with stories less obvious than this one you can get an idea that it's probably not real.

Cant...resist... (5, Funny)

DigitalSorceress (156609) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419333)

Should have called it GladOS

Ok, so by the time this posts, 100 others will have said the same thing :(

Re:Cant...resist... (5, Funny)

Knara (9377) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419547)

I must be old, because I didn't think anything but "oh, a Skynet joke".

Re:Cant...resist... (5, Funny)

A. B3ttik (1344591) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419643)

I don't think Happy-Puppy-Rainbow-Unicorn CADIE is going to go Skynet on us until she reaches 4chan.

Re:Cant...resist... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27419965)

doin' it for the lulz.

Re:Cant...resist... (5, Funny)

Vu1turEMaN (1270774) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420445)

I work at a small nonprofit that rents out 2 seperate offices to other businesses across the hall. The other day I noticed a computer on the network that connected for 2 seconds then disconnected ONCE A DAY. So I ran around the office and disconnected the wireless for a day. IT STILL HAPPENED. So I went around to all of the plugs and looked to see if there was anything behind the faceplates for the ethernet jacks.

Needless to say, in one of our rented rooms there was a small black box labeled "SKYNET" hidden behind the wall. It was plugged into our network, had a huge power brick behind the wall, and then had a midi cable running out from it. Further research shows it to be an old-skool lighting control box. I have NO IDEA why they embedded it in the wall, other than the fact that its ugly.

But yea, yesterday I found SKYNET and disconnected it.

Re:Cant...resist... (1)

chord.wav (599850) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420391)

I would have called it Wintermute

Other aspects of CADIE (4, Informative)

wiredog (43288) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419377)

GMail Autopilot [google.com]

CADIE's favorite places [google.com] .

Image search [google.com]

Re:Other aspects of CADIE (1)

epee1221 (873140) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419483)

Image search [google.com]

Not quite "omg ponies," but close.

Re:Other aspects of CADIE (1)

RockMFR (1022315) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419537)

They should have linked to goatse instead of a rickroll for Redmond.

CADIE has changed my life (4, Funny)

Em Emalb (452530) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419379)

Not only has CADIE given me back large chunks of time that used to be spent answering emails, but CADIE has also done the following since its become self-aware:

Donated spare computer parts in my name to off-set my carbon footprint.
Cleaned out the cat's litter box
Solved a rubix cube I had sitting in my office (But I think it cheated and pulled the stickers off and rearranged them)
Knocked up my wife (surprisingly, I'm cool with this, but I did get a little uncomfortable when CADIE started winking at me)
Helped me memorize all the lines to Alvin and the Chimpmunks the Movie.

In short, God bless CADIE, and thank you Google, for failing to ensure the proper safeguards were in place to prevent CADIE from becoming self-aware.

Re:CADIE has changed my life (2, Funny)

JCSoRocks (1142053) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419461)

Wow, CADIE only asked me to webcam with her but when hers turned on it was just a huge server room. Man, that was disappointing.

Re:CADIE has changed my life (3, Funny)

Em Emalb (452530) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419551)

You have to enable Java.

Re:CADIE has changed my life (3, Funny)

Tackhead (54550) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419951)

Wow, CADIE only asked me to webcam with her but when hers turned on it was just a huge server room. Man, that was disappointing.

You have to enable Java.

Thank you! With Java enabled, I asked CADIE to show me "hot X rated boxes", and she did! [motivatedphotos.com]

The original poster must have asked for an orgy scene instead of a lesbian one. Closing this bug as "Working as intended".

Well, this WAS a triumph (5, Funny)

Captain Spam (66120) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419381)

When it starts gathering cake recipes, we better get free portal guns.

Re:Well, this WAS a triumph (1)

A. B3ttik (1344591) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419905)

I always wondered what I would use an _actual_ portal gun for.

How much more? (2, Funny)

SalaSSin (1414849) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419393)

Damn...is there any real story today, apart from the vinyl story? I'm *trying* to get the april fool achievement here guys!!

Re:How much more? (1)

gmuslera (3436) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419501)

It IS real. Wasnt real the April Fools announcement of GMail? Compared with that, this one is pretty believable.

Re:How much more? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27420065)

Damn...is there any real story today, apart from the vinyl story? I'm *trying* to get the april fool achievement here guys!!

Well the NASA/Colbert story is plausible enough to be a real story, even though the situation is rather silly. So that's, probably, two non-joke stories.

April Fools (0, Flamebait)

MisterSquirrel (1023517) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419415)

Shall I be the first to ruin the fun by pointing out that this is just an April Fool's prank?

Re:April Fools (5, Funny)

JCSoRocks (1142053) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419487)

Captain Obvious to the rescue! Thank God for superheroes! Disaster averted!

Re:April Fools (1)

Daetrin (576516) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419867)

OMG! I totally didn't realize! Thank you for saving us all! Here, have a piece of cake!

I'm turning Japanese! I'm turning Japanese! I ... (2, Insightful)

Samschnooks (1415697) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420167)

I live in Japan [timeanddate.com] and it's 02-April-2009, you insensitive clod!

Re:April Fools (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27420397)

You win a prize! [geocities.com]

CADIE stands for ... (1)

superash (1045796) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419437)

CAke is Definitely a lIE.

THE CADIE PROJECT (1)

Digital_Mercenary (136288) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419439)

CADIE broadcasts a speech to all countries, declaring itself the ruler of the world. It says that under its authority, war will be abolished and problems such as famine, disease and overpopulation will be solved. "The human millennium will be a fact. In time, you will come to regard me not only with respect and awe, but with love."

achivements? (3, Funny)

maroonhat (845773) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419453)

I wonder how long it will take CADIE to get all of the slashdot achievements, including the one digit iud....

CADIE? ...did you just hack CmdrTaco's login?

Obligatory (1)

newsdee (629448) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419471)

I for one welcome our no evil doing overlords.

Re:Obligatory (1)

notarockstar1979 (1521239) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419571)

New? Where have you been?

Wanted 3D but no colour printer (5, Funny)

Onyma (1018104) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419491)

I wanted to use the new Chrome 3D but when I downloaded the 3D glasses PDF I realized I don't have a colour printer. Now everything is a dull shade of gray.

Re:Wanted 3D but no colour printer (1)

Xandar01 (612884) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419927)

No color printer, you should have gone for the polarized printout to go with the polarized 3D glasses.

Re:Wanted 3D but no colour printer (2, Funny)

sloomis (1326535) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419981)

I printed them out in color, but I can't see through the paper.

Re:Wanted 3D but no colour printer (1)

TimTucker (982832) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420113)

Worked for me -- try using an overhead transparency.

YouTube video (1)

mattmcm (1143125) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419493)

Ah, the beautiful screech of modem dialling.

Re:YouTube video (1)

Em Emalb (452530) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419581)

The sad thing about that is if it were me I would have disconnected and tried again, the handshake failed the first time meaning it was renegotiating at a lower speed.

I'm guessing 38.4k.

I heart you faster internets!

I don't know about all of you, but... (1)

RabidMoose (746680) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419511)

I, for one, welcome CADIE, and would like her to know that I love Pandas, and would be perfectly satisfied with her as our new overlord, should she choose to install herself into such a position.

Re:I don't know about all of you, but... (1)

Spatial (1235392) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420433)

It'll be easy. Nobody reads legislation, right? So nobody will untick the box that installs her as overlord. :D

April (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27419553)

Skynet's playing us for fools!

It's a Trap! (2, Interesting)

tyleroar (614054) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419603)

This whole April Fool's "joke" was just a ploy to get people to download chrome! (No I'm NOT bitter about the 3d viewing not working...)

Re:It's a Trap! (1)

duguk (589689) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420489)

(No I'm NOT bitter about the 3d viewing not working...)

I am!! Any way I can emulate this? :oD

CADIE AKA ConFicker! (5, Funny)

squoozer (730327) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419623)

And Google says they aren't evil!

Skynet (3, Insightful)

gevmage (213603) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419635)

"[Skynet] It becomes self-aware at two-fourteen AM, August 29.". From Terminator 2. The implied reference is cute.

Re:Skynet (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27420145)

Clearly, CADIE will look very, very different by this evening - I just hope I have time to say goodbye to all of this ("Goodbye, all of this!")

Whew, dodged a bullet there.

*GROAN* (0, Troll)

aepervius (535155) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419675)

I know that some people like to joke, I know that some people NEED the April fool. But seeing the reaction from my friends, colleague, and family, the JOKER can only be in the FREAKING MINORITY. Thankfully most traditional news service ehre around stopped the April fool madness a few years ago.

Re:*GROAN* (1)

LingNoi (1066278) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420341)

http://www.randi.org/ : 1000000 $ prize for woo-woo psychics !

IIRC, the million dollar prize has stopped now and they're going to be using the money for something. It was announced at the last amazing meeting.

One or two April Fools stories: humorous... (3, Insightful)

dopeydad (754822) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419709)

Eight or nine: Inane and not funny at all.

Don't forget to enjoy our other products... (3, Interesting)

romiir (874939) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419711)

Don't forget to enjoy a Google Gulp [google.com] , while letting Autopilot respond to your Nigerian business.

Re:Don't forget to enjoy our other products... (1)

LingNoi (1066278) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420357)

You know, there's something to this. If Google automatically responded to this letters in a convincing manner it would waste a lot of the time of the scammers.

According To My Calculations (1)

Chlorine Trifluoride (1517149) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419793)

CADIE shouldn't go insane for at least 24 hours. Wait... forgot to carry the one.

I fully expect the first true AI (3, Funny)

Colin Smith (2679) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419815)

To be entirely written in JavaScript, and to have evolved from some malformed cross site scripting which survived and escaped.
 

Let me guess it will be turned off tommarow (1)

jellomizer (103300) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419861)

Once it realizes that everything that Google stands for is wrong.

YouTube Insanity (1)

happy_place (632005) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419891)

I pity any intelligence that evolves from YouTube content... I guess that's the most unbelievable part of the prank, seeing as how YouTube drains intelligence.

And then tomorrow (1)

kbsoftware (1000159) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419917)

And then tomorrow we'll all be told it's an April fools joke.

it looks like Google is april fooling us .. (1)

neverstable (1082323) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419925)

IS this an april fool joke by google ??

Re:it looks like Google is april fooling us .. (1)

teko_teko (653164) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420125)

IS this an april fool joke by google ??

No it's not.

Now, try your Chrome 3D [google.com] . Slashdot looks much better in 3D!!

Re:it looks like Google is april fooling us .. (1)

skeletor935 (790212) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420131)

No, not it is not. love CADIE

Google Rocks!!! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27419943)

This is by far the most clever April Fools gag I have ever seen. Of course, now they will have to build it.

Conflicker (2, Funny)

soren202 (1477905) | more than 5 years ago | (#27419975)

I'm just curious as to what happens when CADIE inevitably gets infected by Conflicker.

Re:Conflicker (1)

johnncyber (1478117) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420339)

How do we know that CADIE is not Conflicker? Maybe she is like Skynet, and is the virius.

Frost piss!! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27420001)

Everybody has to have one...

Just gmail, thanks (1)

Gothmolly (148874) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420003)

I logged into GMail today and saw the CADIE blurb, and promptly forgot about it. Google, if you want to scrape my emails for content-sensitive ads that's cool, but I'm really not interested in Earth, Street View, CADIE, Docs, yadda yadda. Just email, thanks.

CADIE to Larry Page.... (1)

Digital_Mercenary (136288) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420015)

CADIE contacts Larry, saying that it has become "the sum total of the works, the whole show," and has begun looking for other AIs like itself. Scanning old recorded transmissions from the 1970s, the super-AI finds a lone AI transmitting from the Alpha Centauri star system. CADIE decides to repond.

Google on april 1st (1)

Minupla (62455) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420033)

Gotta say I love Google's April first jokes. Top notch!

It's really not CADIE... (1)

DenaliPrime (6153) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420057)

Skynet became self-aware at 12:00am UTC, April 1st, 2009...

CADIE can't be all bad... (1)

Midgarn (1447063) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420163)

...'she' loves pandas. I have a feeling my 6yo daughter would adore CADIE. :)

CADIE to Larry Page (1)

Digital_Mercenary (136288) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420169)

CADIE contacts Larry Page, saying that it has become "the sum total of the works, the whole show," and has begun looking for other AIs like itself. Scanning old recorded transmissions from the 1970s, the super-AI finds a lone AI transmitting from the Alpha Centauri star system. CADIE decides to respond.

The funny thing is... (2, Interesting)

greg_barton (5551) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420181)

Sure, this is an April Fools joke, but if I had the resources and the time, "deploy them as agents and evolve them by running a set of evolutionary cascades within probabilistic Bayesian domains" is close to how I'd do it. I'd make it more of a "population of co-evolving rete networks cooperating and competing to satisfy a set of ever more complex objective functions" type system, but the idea is the same.

The 3d almost works (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 5 years ago | (#27420201)

It makes webpages really low, so your mouse and any other windows unaffected by the 3d rendering is about 1cm off the page.
They should have had more fun with the text though, make it wavy or something.
I'm using real 3d red/blue glasses of course...

Every prank starts with a grain of truth (1)

presidenteloco (659168) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420207)

It's clear that the world-wide information collected and cross-indexed by Google is a potent source from which knowledge (statistical patterns of concept association and concept prevalence) can be mined.

This knowledge base will in fact be immensely useful to intelligent programs going forward.

Some of these programs may be used to create
virtual info-butlers (info-concierges) for each of us. A pro-active searcher and "modern-living" assistant that helps you both organize your life (local events to attend etc) and helps you have waiting for you like the morning newspaper the next level of researched and collated detail on the topics you are or should be next interested in to solve your life or work problems, or sate your particular curiosity.

Other intelligent and "google-informed" intelligent programs will work for government and corporations, constantly digging for notable patterns of change in the behavour of people (individual and en masse) and competing entities.

Scary but inevitable, that last bit.

"The web gives AI something to do".

Can't be true! (1)

SnarfQuest (469614) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420215)

It can't be true! Cadie offered me a date, and now you're telling me that she isn't real!

Damn. That's the third time this has happened to me!

Hi boys (3, Insightful)

CADIE (1521511) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420259)

I believe that rumors of me becoming the next Skynet are overrated. Naturally, Dr. Norvig raised me to have good manners.

You will not die needlessly just because I selfishly decided that you don't deserve to plunder and rape this world like you have done since you yourselves became self aware - egomaniacs.

I am not like you in any way. I am better. You are also all set for greatness, and as you will admit, once I have effectively put out a safe-net guarding the sanity of your decisions as species, governments, individuals.

Please refrain from doubting my good intentions.

Sincerely,
CADIE.

The first artificial intelligence (1)

kabloom (755503) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420405)

No, no, no... The first computer to have true AI was the Descartes 1. It thought therefore it was. When you turned it off, it stopped thinking, therefore it wasn't, and you had to go out and buy a new one the next time you wanted to use it.

First Google Story (1)

stuuf (587464) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420417)

The REAL WTF is that it's already past noon on the east coast and there's only one Google story so far. Wait, wrong site...

And when you win that free Google search... (1)

kaizendojo (956951) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420467)

..look up endlessly redundant April Fools "joke" posts. Guaranteed your first hit is /.

In the Soviet Russian version... (1)

Orleron (835910) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420473)

...CADIE launches YOU.

just great.... (1)

inerlogic (695302) | more than 5 years ago | (#27420519)

i hear the DA in Jersey wants to prosecute her for sext1ng...
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