George Washington Racks Up 220 Years of Late Fees At Library 146
Everyone knows that George Washington couldn't tell a lie. What you probably didn't know is that he couldn't return a library book on time. From the article: "New York City's oldest library says one of its ledgers shows that the president has racked up 220 years' worth of late fees on two books he borrowed, but never returned. One of the books was the 'Law of Nations,' which deals with international relations. The other was a volume of debates from Britain's House of Commons. Both books were due on Nov. 2, 1789."
And he decided to pay the late fees... (Score:5, Funny)
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Better in quarters...
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Bloody criminal.
Bloody white, colonialist, cristian, elitist, democratic, bigoted (etc. etc.) criminal.
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You've got a +5 funny right now, but you won't think this is a laughing matter when Philip Baker Hall shows up at Mount Vernon to collect the debt....
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So..... Dear George, your library fees are now -$32768.00
It turns out if you wait long enough you no longer owe money on them, but the library will pay you to bring them back!
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It turns out if you wait long enough
It turns out if the POTUS waits long enough
It turns out if the first POTUS waits long enough
FTFY.
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Of course - if only because those books, if they still exist, are now antiques.
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Actually, if you read the article (I know, Slashdot, good luck there), they'd like the books back. I'm sure they would. Beyond the normal antique value, there is a higher value because of the holder of the book. They'd probably both sell at auction for a fortune.
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Well, they'd probably accept a federally issued picture id. He could whip a dollar bill out and say "look, me." Then again, with decomposition, he probably doesn't look much like his pictures any more. That, and folks may get the heebie jeebies when a decomposing zombie comes walking in to pay a bill. :)
Re:And he decided to pay the late fees... (Score:5, Funny)
"But's it's former President George Washington! That's practically treason!"
"It wants our brains! Shoot it! It's coming through the door!"
"But, but...President! Founding Father! George Washington!"
"Zombie Apocalypse begins today if you don't shoot it!"
"But this is the Father of our Country"
"I don't care, give me the gun!"
BOOM!
"You...you shot George Washington...Who...Who are you?"
"Ash Williams. You can thank me now."
case (Score:5, Funny)
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looks like he really bucked the system lol
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In some places, he could be denied renewing his driving license based upon overdue books. ;-)
Re:case (Score:5, Insightful)
Privately, however, Washington could -- and did -- lead by example. In his will, he arranged for all of the slaves he owned to be freed after the death of his wife, Martha. He also left instructions for the continued care and education of some of his former slaves, support and training for all of the children until they came of age, and continuing support for the elderly.
Washington on slavery [mountvernon.org]
It is sometimes helpful not to bash people who were stuck in a system that they sought to improve with as little violence as possible (This didn't end up happening in the US, but in Britain and other European countries slavery was outlawed over time without violence).
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"But, as it is, we have the wolf by the ear, and we can neither hold him, nor safely let him go. Justice is in one scale, and self-preservation in the other."
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It's also worth noting that in many places in Europe, including Britain slavery was outlawed before the US civil war.
1102, slave trading and serfdom ruled illegal in London.
1117, slavery declared illegal in Iceland.
1335, slavery declared illegal in Sweden.
1723, Russia abolishes slavery.
1761, slavery declared illegal in mainland Portugal.
1772, English courts decide t
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Sure, when everyone around you's wrong, it's understandable that you'd be wrong along with them. It's not an excuse, however.
The tendency to accept what everyone around you believes as necessarily true is one reason that the much maligned "multiculturalism" is important. People don't like that because it undermines their certainty about things, but sometimes that certainty *ought* to be undermined. Like the proverbial visitor from Mars, somebody from another culture can see things that are obviously wrong
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Never spoke out publicly against slavery. Signed an act that allowed hunters to enter free states to recover runaway slaves. Supported only whites to become citizens of the United States.
On this point he and the rest of the founding fathers had the choice between the ugly reality of slavery and half of the colonies not signing on to the constitution or agreeing to the fight for independence.
The result of the revolutions failure could have been Canada and they could have all been freed 20 years early, or it could have been apartheid South Africa. If you're going to Monday morning quarterback at least consider that this world of black and white you live in is often complicated by circumsta
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> George inherited 10 slaves, and by the time of his death had hundreds of them.
Because he married a rich (much richer than him) widow, with lots of slaves. The reason that he freed his wife's slaves after her death was that he couldn't legally do that before her death, since most were hers or mostly hers (in the cases where the slaves were born after his marriage).
> And only supported emancipation of his slaves as long as he could find a buyer to pay him for it.
Pardon? You seem to have skipped a cl
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Why do so many look at OUR OWN history with our own contemporary values but not that of other cultures? We look at the damage done to native Americans by our ancestors for example -- but fail to ever talk about the slavery endemic to many of the native cultures at the time. We fail to talk about the cannibalism and human sacrifice that was frequently practiced as well. Had history not progressed the way it did, how many people would have been enslaved? Hunt
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It's the absurd idea that anything Hitler did is automatically bad, for example the Nazis created Volkswagen, so therefore VW is evil.
In the case of the founding fathers, the fact that they were slave owners is supposed to mean that everything they did was bad and should be changed. Often it's used to justify the illegal behavior of current politicians because the old rules they are breaking were written by slave holders
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Think about it. Do you toss out EVERYTHING good done by someone who lives in a time when the abolition movement is starting? "Well, Benjamin Rush started PSAS -- in the mid 18 century, so the ENTIRE culture is against slavery!" Doesn't work that way.
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He felt so strongly about it that he never bought nor sold any of his slaves and freed them upon his and Martha's deaths. He often faced serious debt
mod parent interesting (Score:2)
for it is, and i have posted in this discussion.
On the bright side... (Score:2)
I would be more than willing to bet that the descendants of the slaves that George Washington bought that are still alive today have a significantly higher standard of living than their counterparts who remained in Africa.
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He treated his slaves far better than most slave owners of the period did. He allowed blacks to serve in his military - from some accounts, 20-25% of his military was composed of blacks who had asked to serve.
I suspect you don't understand what things were like at that time. Rich white landowners were practically *required* to own slaves - if you did not, it was a black mark against you in a social and political sense.
I would suggest that you look up and read some of his papers.
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So... (Score:5, Insightful)
Where are the books now?
Re:So... (Score:5, Informative)
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If we go to a better news source [bbc.co.uk], we see that
BBC?! So, you're implying the British took them?
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Re:So... (Score:4, Funny)
That was a bit over the top, just to get back two books, wasn't it?
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It's entirely possible those books burned with the White House [eyewitnesstohistory.com] in 1814.
Quote from link:
All thoughts of accommodation were instantly laid aside; the troops advanced forthwith into the town, and having first put to the sword all who were found in the house from which the shots were fired, and reduced it to ashes, they proceeded, without 'a moment's delay, to burn and destroy everything in the most distant degree connected with government. In this general devastation were included the S
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Ask John Adams... He either:
1) borrowed them from Washington while VP
or
2) found them when he moved into the White House... Assuming Washington brought the books with him when the place was completed.
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Washington never lived there, and the books were borrowed from the NEW YORK PUBLIC LIBRARY, when New York was the capital.
Re:So... (Score:4, Funny)
And what happened to privacy? What would Washington think about the library publishing what books he borrowed and how much he owes in fees?
Re:So... (Score:4, Funny)
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Ah! The Shay Rebellion... indeed, there was "too [much] Shay".
The Kajagoggles, they do nothing! (Score:2)
And what happened to privacy? What would Washington think about the library publishing what books he borrowed and how much he owes in fees?
Too shay.
George Washington was too shay, shay? [youtube.com]
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Just in case you didn't know, it's "touché" and not "too shay".
Just in case you didn't know... it's probably Shay [wikipedia.org]. ;)
Re:So... (Score:5, Funny)
He'd think "bbbbrraaaaaaaaaiiiinnnssssszzzz" because thats what Zombies think.
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And what happened to privacy? What would Washington think about the library publishing what books he borrowed and how much he owes in fees?
Nothing, he's dead.
I know how he feels (Score:2)
Obligatory (Score:5, Funny)
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You mean:
Obligatory
Old news!
Hey man (Score:2, Funny)
don't Bundy that book
Mod parent up (Score:2)
It's a clue. (Score:5, Funny)
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Mount Vernon, September 25, 1798. From: George Washington To: George Snyder
I have heard much of the nefarious, and dangerous plan, and doctrines of the Illuminati, but never saw the Book until you were pleased to send it to me.9 The same causes which have prevented my acknowledging the receipt of your letter have prevented my reading the Book, hitherto; namely, the multiplicity of matters which pressed upon me before, and the debilitated state in which I was left after, a severe fever had been removed. And which allows me to add little more now, than thanks for your kind wishes and favourable sentiments, except to correct an error you have run into, of my Presiding over the English lodges in this Country. The fact is, I preside over none, nor have I been in one more than once or twice, within the last thirty years. I believe notwithstanding, that none of the Lodges in this Country are contaminated with the principles ascribed to the Society of the Illuminati.
The book he is referring to is Proofs of a Conspiracy [amazon.com] by John Robison
Mount Vernon, October 24, 1798. From: George Washington To: George Snyder
It was not my intention to doubt that, the Doctrines of the Illuminati, and principles of Jacobinism had not spread in the United States. On the contrary, no one is more truly satisfied of this fact than I am.
The idea that I meant to convey, was, that I did not believe that the Lodges of Free Masons in this Country had, as Societies, endeavoured to propagate the diabolical tenets of the first, or pernicious principles of the latter (if they are susceptible of seperation). That Individuals of them may have done it, or that the founder, or instrument employed to found, the Democratic Societies in the United States, may have had these objects; and actually had a seperation of the People from their Government in view, is too evident to be questioned.
My occupations are such, that but little leisure is allowed me to read News Papers, or Books of any kind; the reading of letters, and preparing answers, absorb much of my time. With respect,
Note: Although in the 2nd letter he says he is "satisfied," meaning he agrees that the Illuminati and their doctrines have made their way to the United States.
Source: [loc.gov] Search for illuminati
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National Treasure 3:Time to Kill Some Wall Street Bankers?
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No, you silly billy. We're talking about the Illuminati, not the Knights Templar.
TEA Party Loots Local Libraries in (Score:1, Flamebait)
3...2...
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This is not necessarily flamebait.
The Tea Party says NO TAXES; well, part of what taxes support are libraries...
Oh, and as long as we're on that subject, I love this statement from the front page of the Tea Party's website:
Tea Party Patriots, Inc. operates as a social welfare organization
A What?
SB
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But Salman Rushdie hates Muslims (well, at least wacky Muslims think so)...I'd think the tea partiers would love him. Plus, 'Rush' is in his name!
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No, No! His name is Rushdie, in other words, Rush-Die. The Tea Partiers definitely wouldn't like that!
LAWL (Score:2)
Sweet URL that goes nowhere bro! I tried copying it in here but /. gave me a lameness error "Filter error: That's an awful long string of letters there.".
Do editors do ANYthing at this site anymore?
Try here instead:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/8627835.stm [bbc.co.uk]
Quirk Books Already on It (Score:3, Funny)
After "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" and "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter", I'm pretty sure Quirk Books must already be working on a tale that involves Mr. Bookman (from Seinfeld, season 3) travelling back in time, terminator-style, to charge late fees on George Washington. That modifies the course of history. Last scene on the book, Bookman is back to the 20th century and the country formerly known as USA is now part of Canada. In the place of the Statue of Liberty, a huge green statue of Celine Dion greets the New Yorkers.
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I'm pretty sure Quirk Books must already be working on a tale that involves Mr. Bookman (from Seinfeld, season 3) travelling back in time, terminator-style, to charge late fees on George Washington.
Sheesh, what a waste of a working time machine! Just go back a bit farther in time and get the books back before they're overdue. People were waiting for those books to return, you know.
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Well, the city previously known as New York. In the alternate reality it could be Stinky River, Lotsofbridgestown, or the french equivalents of these.
Send Bookman after him... (Score:1)
The library went to a lot of trouble... (Score:3, Interesting)
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The library went to a lot of trouble to prove that their records from the 18th century are probably a bit inaccurate.
Got them in the press, didn't it ?
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The library went to a lot of trouble to prove that their records from the 18th century are probably a bit inaccurate. It could have been as simple as a star-struck librarian forgetting to update the register.
Maybe, but probably not. [boingboing.net] They found the rest of the set of books, minus the volumes that Washington borrowed. I suppose it could be a coincidence, but it would appear that Mr. Washington's estate owes the NYPL a great deal of money, and their book back.
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The library went to a lot of trouble to prove that their records from the 18th century are probably a bit inaccurate.
The New York Society Library was a private subscription library. Washington would have been charged a substantial annual assessment or membership fee.
In related news (Score:2)
an arrest warrant [go.com] was issued for noted military leader, statesman, father of the nation, and library scofflaw George Washington.
Not quite so late, but... (Score:3, Interesting)
Re:Not quite so late, but... (Score:5, Funny)
I was related to Mary Coyle Chase
Technically, you still are.
Alternate ending (Score:2)
We found a book which had been checked out of the Denver Public Library in 1929. It was really fun returning it. I asked how much the fine was. The person at the circulation desk called the head librarian, and had a good laugh, a ferocious laugh, a cackle almost. Then the head librarian peered at me over her thick-rimmed glasses and grinned menacingly. She said, sternly, "Come with me." Then she lead me through the stacks, down a short stairway, and toward a dark, heavy door.
To continue following the librar
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ha!
send bookman to get the book back! (Score:3, Funny)
send bookman to get the book back!
Authors suing for loss of IP? (Score:5, Funny)
I mean, think of how much revenue they must've lost!
Other GW failings (Score:2)
US Federal Debt (Score:5, Funny)
Now we know why the US Federal Debt is so high. That fine is probably still being carried by the Office of the President.
controlling the flow of media (Score:1, Offtopic)
is a fool's errand
let it go wherever it wants, for free, and profit off the ancillary revenue streams of such an attitude
the alternative approach assumes that you have more control than you can ever have, even theoretically
even our founding fathers were media "pirates"
Weak Evidence (Score:5, Insightful)
Oh really now? (Score:2)
Everyone knows that George Washington couldn't tell a lie.
Good ol' Honest George.
Blame it on... (Score:2)
No, I didn't mean THAT kind of affair!! A President would never do that kind of thing would they?
How much does he owe? (Score:2)
We have an article on two books 220 years late, references to late fees, but no estimate on what George Washington would owe. Without that figure this is like a joke without the punchline.
Probably he was busy following French Revolution (Score:2)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/French_Revolution [wikipedia.org]
notice the dates. he probably forgot all kinds of due dates due to the speed things were proceeding in france. by his books' due date, everyone in the world was aware that what was happening was a revolution.
I feel a lynchin' comin' on! (Score:2)
Sue his descendants for the late fees and pay off the national debt?
And they want to run healthcare... (Score:2, Funny)
When it takes 220 years for a government institution to figure out that a book is overdue, does anyone really think it would be a good idea to let them run a health care system?
I know its humorous because this is just a library book, but it serves as a striking example of how government bureaucracies can depart from the supposed intentions of their founders. Consider:
so, how are late charges being assesed? (Score:2)
Compounded interest beyond teh value of the books.
Hmm, why does this make me think of the music and video industry regarding piracy lawsuits on one hand and the policies of redbox and block busters on the other hand where they charge you maximum of the cost of the video?
And yahoo shows and expired article....
Oh how redundant...
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Maybe the termites got to his teeth.
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White guilt means guilt over doing what the other people would have done if they were in our forefathers shoes.
Of course every non-white superpower throughout history (the Mongols, the Persians, the Arabs, the Chinese, the Japanese, the Indians) was a beacon of human rights and good will towards men. It's only the evil European powers that exploited their position in the world towards their own ends.....
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Unfortunately, the term white guilt is only used as a precursor to xenophobic and racist speeches.
I know you are smarter and more eloquent then that.
The dictionary definition and the colloquial definition differ with the term "white guilt" as it has become synonymous with the most nationalist and racist of radicals in the western world. It's used as more of a cop out, to ignore and excuse
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Where is Conan the Librarian [youtube.com] when we need him?
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Nah, $2 compounded at 5% for 221 years only gives $96,000 today (even a 10% yearly ROI would only net $2.8 billion). Can't blame the debt crisis on THAT George W.
Re:More slashdot fail (Score:2)
"[H]e couldn't return a library book on time" is an awfully broad stroke based on "two books he borrowed, but never returned." How many other books did he borrow and return on time? If you can't answer that, we have two books out of an unknown number, which could be 2/2 (100%) or 2/2000 (suggesting he actually could return things on time).
Is logic really that hard?
Additionally, he was probably busy doing Presidential things since this was the first year of his Presidency. And the ledger says "president",
obligatory Python quote (Score:2)
He's not dead, he's just pining for the fjords!