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Indonesian Police Barred From Penis Enlargement

samzenpus posted more than 4 years ago | from the speak-softly-and-carry-a-big... dept.

Idle 11

If you have had your penis enlarged, don't try to join the Papua police force. Papua police chief Bekto says an applicant "will be asked whether or not his vital organ has been enlarged. If he has, he will be considered unfit to join the police or the military." A police spokesperson says that an enlarged organ causes a "hindrance during training." The best part of this story is the method Indonesians have been using to enhance themselves. From the article: "Papuans use a local technique to achieve the enlargement, according to a sexologist quoted by local newspaper Jakarta Globe, wrapping the penis with leaves from the 'gatal-gatal' (itchy) tree so that it swells up 'like it has been stung by a bee,' the expert said." Apparently the force has all the dicks it can handle already.

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11 comments

You're all wondering (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 4 years ago | (#31963958)

Does... does it work?

Re:You're all wondering (1)

cyp43r (945301) | more than 4 years ago | (#31964288)

Let's not forget the most important question, by how much and does it last? We've all heard of the miracle drugs the spammers send us and penis pumps but this looks like it could be even better!

Re:You're all wondering (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 4 years ago | (#31974246)

Surgery is usually the easier method. Most men have a few extra inches of penis inside of them. What a cosmetic surgeon will do is go in between your legs, make a few snips of muscle, move some stuff forward, and presto: a longer penis.

Re:You're all wondering (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 4 years ago | (#31984300)

Most men have a few extra inches of penis inside of them.

Hey. Not me!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Actually... no (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 4 years ago | (#31966242)

My penis is big enough already.

Re:You're all wondering (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 4 years ago | (#31981844)

I don't know if it works, but it's very close to a procedure described in the gama sutra.

As I recall, the process goes like this:

1. Get a bed with a hole in it
2. Get bees to sting you all over your penis
3. IIRC there may have been some herbal compound to be applied to your stung and swollen penis while the next step is ongoing, but not sure
4. Lay in the bed face-down, with your penis hanging through the hole with weights tied on it, for something like a week.
5. ???
6. Profit!

Seriously, the first four steps are what it said, but I can't imagine being desperate enough to try it...

Re:You're all wondering (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 4 years ago | (#31982018)

And by "gama sutra", naturally I mean the Kama Sutra -- gamasutra would not be a place I'd expect to find this suggestion...

Idle (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 4 years ago | (#31964586)

Idle.
It is pants. Literally.

buy... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#31969028)

g4t41-g4t41 now!

The Papua Police motto: (3, Funny)

Locke2005 (849178) | more than 3 years ago | (#31969550)

"We want men that ARE big dicks, not men that HAVE big dicks!

Re:The Papua Police motto: (1)

ooshna (1654125) | more than 3 years ago | (#31970188)

lol sounds like every woman with a black eye living in a double wide trailer
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