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Apple Awarded Anti-Sexting Patent

CmdrTaco posted more than 3 years ago | from the don't-do-that dept.

Cellphones 184

eldavojohn writes "If your parenting skills aren't up to snuff, Apple's got a patent on the device that will allow you to control what your child sends and receives. Entitled 'Text-based communication control for personal communication device,' this patent uses examples like increasing the number of Spanish words your child receives so that they can better learn Spanish. You could even use it to control your child's grammar and spelling in outgoing text messages. But news sources seem to be focusing on the censorship issue that Apple has been criticized for before: 'The control is in line with earlier efforts adopted by Apple like Playboy which entered into a deal with Apple to censor its content to secure a place in App Store.' Perhaps the wives and agents of popular athletes would be more interested in this technology? Apple is certainly sending a message opposite to the one Microsoft advertises."

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No surprise (-1, Offtopic)

Pojut (1027544) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883716)

We're all fully aware of how pornography causes hipsters heads to explode.

Speaking of hipsters...

Question: How many hipsters it takes to screw in a light bulb?
Answer: An obscure number you've probably never heard of...don't bother looking for it, you won't find it.

Dead Nigger Storage, there's an App for that! (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33883828)

Dead Nigger Storage Inc is a successful business founded in 1994 by Toluca Lake, Los Angeles resident Jimmie Dimmick, after a misunderstanding with two acquaintances from the local underworld. In an interview made in 2004 with Pulp Magazine, Dimmick stated that the idea for his business originally came from his dealings with a mysterious "Mr Wolfe" several years previously.

Dead Nigger Storage Inc is publicly traded on the Nasdaq stock market under the symbol DEDNIG.

Business Overview

The business focuses on a simple service provision as the basis for their corporate offering, namely the creation of storage facilities specially built to store dead and/or decaying afro-americans. With offices in Alabama; Elko, Nevada; Georgia; Louisiana; Palmdale, California; and South Carolina, Dead Nigger Storage Inc now has more branches throughout the Confederate States of America than both KFC and Big Kahuna Burgers combined.

Originally run from Jimmie and Bonnie Dimmick's garage, the business' growth rate within the first few months of operating forced them into a rethink. In 1998, the Dimmicks purchased Monster Joe's Truck and Tow in Downtown Los Angeles, which has remained their base of operations to this day.

With the catchy friendly slogan of "Storing Dead Niggers is our business" Dead Nigger Storage Inc remains a market leader at the forefront of ethnic minority storage, despite the recent upsurge in the market for companies such as Jews on Ice and the Cracker Barrel.

Very recently, Dead Nigger Storage Inc has expanded into a chain with several branches outside of the United States. Though each branch outside the USA are largely similar to their American counterparts, most customers note a handful of "little differences". For example, in America one can store a decapitated Nigerian. In the Paris branch, however, one stores un Nigirié guillotin. In general, dead niggers are still called dead niggers, but over there they're called les dead niggers and corpse sizes are measured differently because of the metric system.

In 1999 Detroit became the largest Dead Nigger Storage facility in the western hemisphere.

Traditional Methods of Storing Dead Niggers

“You know what they preserve dead niggers with in Holland instead of synthetic petroleum based chemical preservatives? Mayonnaise.”
~ Vincent Vega on storing Dead Niggers

Many individuals have struggled with the issue of dead nigger storage, including Jefferson Davis and John C. Calhoun who favoured the time-attested methodology of dry suspension, a technique that preserved by hanging them in carefully controlled environments for up to 21 days.

Other techniques utilised include smoking, often over specially constructed firepits or pyres. Although this often provides a more pleasurable flavour and aroma, it often led to a complete burning of the subject.

Pulverization is often utilised, either through the use of sticks, or in more extreme case through "dragging", a technique thought to include a pick-up truck. Another practice designed to aid tenderization is referred to as "curbstomping".

Dead Nigger Storage in Popular Culture

Dead Nigger Storage is subtly referenced in 14 separate Quentin Tarantino movies including Reservoir Dogs and the two Kill Bill films. The company also has numerous placements with Tarantino's latin lover Robert Rodriguez' movies, including The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl.

English Murder Mystery Writer Agatha Christie, referenced the company in perhaps her most famous work, Ten Dead Negroes made into the 1957 film The Only Good Injun is a Dead Injun. Perhaps her most famous reference remains the Hercule Poirot "quote" "Sacre bleu! C'est un morte negro, non?" in The Murder of Michael Donald.

One of the main accusations of racism aimed at George Lucas over his Star Wars franchise was his portrayal of certain species along stereotypical lines. Famously, in the scene when Jar Jar Binks is fatally wounded in the head whilst riding in the back seat of Mace Windu's landspeeder, a small sign can be seen in the background stating "Dead Gungan Storage".

Oh come on... (3, Insightful)

geminidomino (614729) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883718)

A Favre jab on slashdot? Seriously?

I knew this place was going down the crapper, but I didn't think it had hit the "E! TV" level of low yet...

"If you're parenting skills aren't up to snuff" (0, Offtopic)

mcgrew (92797) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884560)

Wht if "you're" spelling and editing skills aren't up to snuff? Dew know truss you're spill chucker! Prof Reed yore con meant!

Re:"If you're parenting skills aren't up to snuff" (1)

mcgrew (92797) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884572)

DOH!

Parenting skills? (3, Insightful)

iamwhoiamtoday (1177507) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883730)

News flash, dearest parents. Controlling everything that your child does is not good parenting. Yes, the kids will mess up every now and then. So do we all. If you impose a lot of rules, monitor every little thing that your child does, then all they will do is find a way around whatever blocks / rules you have in place. They have a LOT of energy, and endless free time.

tl:dr - Being a good parent does not mean monitoring every little action.

Re:Parenting skills? (2, Funny)

Thanshin (1188877) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883778)

Controlling everything that your child does is not good parenting.

Unless you want your children to become great liars, a necessary skill for any management position.

Or spies.

Or ninja!

Re:Parenting skills? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884652)

You missed the main one!

Or Politicians.

Re:Parenting skills? (4, Insightful)

Darkness404 (1287218) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883784)

Exactly. Heck, strict parenting has your kids go wild later in life. The people who control their kids lives in middle and high school either have a massive rebellion in high school, or if they put them in the college that the kid doesn't want to go to, they will rebel later in life.

If you don't let your kids do little things (watch R rated movies, hang out with friends, read what they want to, etc.) and then whenever they do realize that those things aren't really harmful, they will question your judgment on things that are harmful, such as drinking and driving.

When parents cry wolf at every little silly harmless "moral panic" they lose credibility with their kids.

Re:Parenting skills? (2, Insightful)

joebok (457904) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883992)

Being a fairly new parent (17 months), I think there is a balance. I believe a responsible parent needs to be involved and sometimes that means observing or monitoring. That is different than controlling. A tool like this could be helpful if used wisely.

From my recent life - my daughter learned how to climb onto the couch. The first thing she did after that was to leap off headfirst. Mommy was there to catch her and that became a great game. Next phase was pillows on the floor and letting her learn a better dismount - i.e. watching but not catching. That is done - and without the pain and agony of a major fall. She is not scared of the couch and knows how to use it effectively.

When she is the appropriate age, I will look for digital tools that will help me to do the same.

Re:Parenting skills? (2, Insightful)

cptdondo (59460) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884088)

At some point, though, you have to let her jump off the couch and whack her head. And stand by and let it happen.

Because if you always catch her, she never learns that there are things in this world that will hurt, will main, will destroy her life.

My kids have gone through their share of bruises, head whacks, and such. If they make a bad decision, and it won't hurt them permanently, I let it ride.

"Good judgement comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement."

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

geekoid (135745) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884380)

And if she catches a corner, it will be a great lesson to the surviving children.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

joebok (457904) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884762)

That is exactly what I said - we stopped catching her; we provided a safe environment into which she could fall. Result is she learned how to get off the couch on her own without any spilled blood. It is not necessary to learn every lesson at the school of hard knocks. A good parent is actively engaged, dynamically balancing protecting their kids and allowing them to grow and learn so they can take care of themselves.

Re:Parenting skills? (2, Insightful)

CecilPL (1258010) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884212)

When I was 5 I leaped off the couch headfirst onto a pile of cushions. Except I underestimated my strength and flew right over the cushions, headfirst into the corner of a solid oak liquor cabinet.

It hurt like crazy but you know what? Agony is inescapable in life, and you have to learn how to deal with it through experience.

Two stitches later I had learned a pretty valuable lesson.

Re:Parenting skills? (5, Insightful)

cptdondo (59460) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884014)

Absolutely. We have some friends who micro-managed their daughter. Now she's 13, has already been thrown out of 2 schools, and on and on. Kids need room to be kids.

Teach your kids to do the right thing. To do that you have to actually live that way too - it does no good to preach the evils of drunk driving, then have 4 beers with dinner and drive home.

Set the example, trust your kids to do the right thing, and talk to them.

Bringing your kids up right is all about respect. I encourage my kids to keep their passwords private, I don't snoop on them, and I encourage them to talk to me.

That's much harder and much more effective than some stupid filter.

Re:Parenting skills? (2, Insightful)

Aeros (668253) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884106)

Im just thinking more and more that maybe the movie 'Idiocracy' might really be our future after all.

Re:Parenting skills? (5, Funny)

s73v3r (963317) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883892)

I don't care. As long as they live under MY Roof, they will use correct grammar and spelling when they send nudie texts.

Re:Parenting skills? (2, Interesting)

AnonymousClown (1788472) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884038)

I don't care. As long as they live under MY Roof, they will use correct grammar and spelling when they send nudie texts.

Easier said than done.

I'm in a predicament. Should I punish the child for spelling it "cumming" instead of "coming"?

Technical hurdles (2, Insightful)

einhverfr (238914) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884394)

It is very difficult to define correct grammar, to start with. (Note false positive for preposition stranding)
Moreover, spelling corrections may disrupt the vital Cupertino between parent and child. (Note Cupertino effect)
Thus I would expect such controls to have no effect, once or ever. (eggcorn)
Because of times when splitting the infinitive is required, I would never expect demand to more than double from where it is today.
Should the passive voice be allowed?

etc.

Technology can't enforce grammar rules effectively.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

sexconker (1179573) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884514)

Post #33883892 was rejected for the following reason:
Exception NON_RECOVERABLE_ERROR thrown by GrammarNazi at LINE 1.

GrammarNazi was looking at the following text:

I don't care. As long as they live under MY Roof, they will use correct grammar and spelling when they send nudie texts.

GrammarNazi returned EXIT_CODE 27 - IMPROPER_CAPITALIZATION. CORRECT AND RESEND. EAT YOUR VEGETABLES.

Debug Information:
Post received by Slashdot's shitty server code.
Post created.
Post was assigned temporary ID 33883892.
Post BEGAN LamenessFilter.
Post PASSED LamenessFilter.
Post BEGAN DuplicationFilter.
DuplicationFilter warns: How about you make a sexy lady version of myself and have her check for duped articles, morons?
Post PASSED DuplicationFilter.
Post BEGAN GrammarNazi.
GrammarNazi warns: You will never amount to anything if you use contractions.
GrammarNazi warns: Using capital letters for emphasis when bolding, italicizing, and underlining is available is the mark of a true rapscallion.
GrammarNazi threw unrecoverable error 27.
Additional errors and warnings may have been suppressed.
Post failed.
Process halted.

Re:Parenting skills? (4, Insightful)

BJ_Covert_Action (1499847) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883920)

If you impose a lot of rules, monitor every little thing that your child does, then all they will do is find a way around whatever blocks / rules you have in place...

The unintended consequence of this, and, dare I say, hidden advantage of it, is that such measures create generations of kids that are good at hacking their way out of oppressive measures whom have little respect for authority. In a world where governments seem to see their role, increasingly, as using any and all means (including technology) at their disposal to trample on human rights, this combination of skills and attitude will be a valuable weapon in the hands of the citizenry.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

HungryHobo (1314109) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884104)

I sometimes wonder if society is stuck in some kind of sine wave.
just as fashions come around again and again so might rebellion and conservatism generation to generation.

Or... (4, Interesting)

BetterSense (1398915) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884642)

"He noticed that she never used Newspeak words except the ones that had passed into everyday use. She had never heard of the Brotherhood, and refused to believe in its existence. Any kind of organized revolt against the Party, which was bound to be a failure, struck her as stupid. The clever thing was to break the rules and stay alive all the same. He wondered vaguely how many others like her there might be in the younger generation people who had grown up in the world of the Revolution, knowing nothing else, accepting the Party as something unalterable, like the sky, not rebelling against its authority but simply evading it, as a rabbit dodges a dog."

From 1984 by George Orwell

Re:Parenting skills? (2, Interesting)

mysidia (191772) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884714)

create generations of kids that are good at hacking their way out of oppressive measures whom have little respect for authority.

Either that or kids who have learned that 'oppressive measures', micromanagement, and overbearing authority are normal.

You are assuming the parents don't break their children down and force them to comply with oppressive measures.

Resulting in kids trained to be docile, even later in life, when the government starts to further trample on inalienable human rights.

Re:Parenting skills? (0, Flamebait)

Orga (1720130) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883934)

The first parenting mistake would to let a child use an apple product.

Re:Parenting skills? (1, Flamebait)

mapkinase (958129) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883936)

"Controlling everything that your child does is not good parenting"

It is never about controlling "everything". It's always a battle, trying to achieve balance. The technology increasing freedoms develops very fast, but technology that curbs them does not develop as fast: naturally children get more and more freedoms in obtaining the questionable material.

Re:Parenting skills? (0, Troll)

jedidiah (1196) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883980)

Yeah... because no one ever just jumped into a dumpster 30 years ago.

There is nothing "new" or "innovative" here. Stuff is just more VISIBLE. The fact that it's going on is in everyone's faces. You can't ignore it. It's much harder to be unaware of what people are doing.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

mapkinase (958129) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884202)

"The fact that it's going on is in everyone's faces. "

I am not sure what are you talking about. It's never on the "faces".

In my childhood we learned dirty talk and obtained pictures from the peers who got it from older kids, who got them from young adults.

Now it is easier to share, which does not mean it becomes public.

In the past bad reputation was spread as easy as now by gossiping. Even without facebook, twitter and texting, everyone "knew" that X is a slut. Now they just have more documentary evidence, but kids still care very little about it.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

mysidia (191772) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884754)

Sorry... 'diving into a dumpster' is my invention. No kid is allowed to do that, and no dumpster owner may allow kids to do that, without first licensing my patent on "Jumping into, digging around, or sticking any hand(s) or feet into a dumpster, to search for interesting things"

Re:Parenting skills? (3, Insightful)

Abstrackt (609015) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883994)

Good points. Being a good parent means not just teaching your kids how to act properly when they are unsupervised but also instilling the desire to do so.

The biggest problem I've seen with parents putting their kids' lives on rails is that when the kid is ever exposed to a new problem they have a hell of a time reasoning out the solution based on previous experience because they've never been allowed to fail.

Re:Parenting skills? (0, Troll)

mapkinase (958129) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884262)

Morals are not about failing, it's about taboo. You can fail if you "DO" something, taboos are about "NOT" doing something. IT's opposite.

You cannot fail if you follow the taboo.

If you daughter does not put herself into a compromising position, she won't be in a compromising position with very rare exceptions of freaky accidents. If your son does not go to a drinking party, he won't get drunk at the drinking party.

The solution is not on the level of parents, the solution is on the level of the society: curb freedoms that burn the fabric of it.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

Kozz (7764) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884348)

Good points. Being a good parent means not just teaching your kids how to act properly when they are unsupervised but also instilling the desire to do so.

Actually a good comment, and reminded me of a quote, summarized:

(Character|Integrity|Morality) is how you act when you think nobody is watching.

Re:Parenting skills? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884614)

The biggest problem I've seen with parents putting their kids' lives on rails is that when the kid is ever exposed to a new problem they have a hell of a time reasoning out the solution based on previous experience because they've never been allowed to fail.

In general I agree. But sending nude pictures of himself to some unknown party on the other end of a smartphone conversation is a kind of failure I am not willing to allow my son to make. The fact that you would disturbs me greatly.

I teach my kid to ride a bike safely. I still make him wear a helmet when he goes out. When he was younger, I taught him how to not burn himself on a hot kitchen stove. I still kept him out of the kitchen when I was cooking. You sound like a rather poor parent.

Re:Parenting skills? (4, Interesting)

kungfugleek (1314949) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884004)

Not monitoring anything isn't good parenting either.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

ncy (1164535) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884152)

agreed, especially if you overlook a child getting into an uncontrollable addiction.

Re:Parenting skills? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884254)

This isn't monitoring it's blocking. They are different approaches entirely.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

houghi (78078) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884328)

Do not try to solve a social problem with a technical solution.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

AliasMarlowe (1042386) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884660)

Not monitoring anything isn't good parenting either.

Monitoring should not be equated with controlling. If you don't attempt to micro-manage your kids' lives, they'll have less motivation to conceal stuff from you. And that means that you'll be better-informed about your kids, their classmates and other buddies, and their activities (naughty as well as nice). You'll also be more likely to know when intervention is needed - before disaster strikes - and your advice is more likely to be heeded if it's given sparingly but clearly.

Our teenage daughter is actually not a problem at home, and is fairly laid-back and open with us. Some of her class-mates, however, have rather fraught relationships with their parents (mostly control freaks or religious zealots). Those are also disproportionately the kids who seem headed for problems with society, or have already achieved that status. The kids whose parents are more tolerant seem to get along much better with adults - and with each other.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

suomynonAyletamitlU (1618513) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884750)

And shockingly, both controlling and failing to monitor is right up there with the worst things you can do. Crazy I know, but they're really not opposites.

"The world is strict and senseless, so cheat, the fuck do I care?"

Re:Parenting skills? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884052)

While you are partly correct, having some controls does prevent temptation.

For example, I make sure I don't keep unhealthy food in the house because I know I would be tempted to eat it. It's easier just to not have it available even though I could get it if I really wanted. It's that small roadblock that makes my life easier to do what I want rather than waste effort fighting temptation. Or substitute food with something that you want to manage but is hard for you.

Same goes for kids. Sure if they really want to do something bad enough then they will find a way but these controls prevent the "curious but dangerous" accidents from happening where the kid might not be all that motivated in the first place.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

onefriedrice (1171917) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884144)

tl:dr - Being a good parent does not mean monitoring every little action.

While it's true that you can't (and shouldn't) monitor everything, I think there are instances where text messages are one of those things that should be monitored, only because of the severity of what could result... such as (possibly revealing) pictures of your kid being put on the internet where they will stay forever. But I'm not a parent, so I'm just supposing that if such an event could be prevented that it would be a very good thing.

Either way, I think it's fairly obvious that monitoring everything your child does cannot be an effective replacement for good parenting in other areas.

Re:Parenting skills? (4, Insightful)

avandesande (143899) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884184)

Buying a child an expensive unnecessary useless gadget to improve their peer status is bad parenting.

Re:Parenting skills? (1, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884248)

most of my computer skills were gained trying to get access to two things: games and porn

Sounds like sour grapes to me (1)

mveloso (325617) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884272)

Well, apparently in your case your parents didn't monitor enough. Look, now you're on slashdot!

Re:Parenting skills? (2, Insightful)

geekoid (135745) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884336)

Newsflash childless limp dicks: It's about moderation. I am not the parent of all the kids, just my kids. How other children are raised impacts my child. So how about we educate them., use moderation, and help them understand instead of just letting them go willy nilly?

I know my kids will find a way around. In some cases I know exactly how they will do it.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

hondo77 (324058) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884442)

I know my kids will find a way around. In some cases I know exactly how they will do it.

+2 Insightful

Re:Parenting skills? (2, Interesting)

LordKronos (470910) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884376)

If you impose a lot of rules, monitor every little thing that your child does, then all they will do is find a way around whatever blocks / rules you have in place.

I saw a story on the local news a few weeks ago. This mother had been monitoring her daughters text message and call logs to see what she had been up to. Nothing suspicious ever came up. Then she learned of a service that the cell carrier provided that would let her log on and monitor the communications that had taken place with the account. She did that and found out that there had been lots of sexting going on among a half dozen or so of her friends. It turns out her daughter had been outwitting her all the time by deleting the offending messages from the history. So you are right, kids definitely will figure out ways around things.

However, here's the part of the story the really got to me and showed what a terrible parent she was. When she found out, she reported all the details to the police. Yes, she reported her own kid. I haven't heard the followup to the story, but the police were considering filing charges against the kids. If they handle this the way a lot of other places I've read about do, then this mother just gave her daughter a place on the sex offenders registry. She may have screwed up her daughters entire future.

Re:Parenting skills? (1)

mcgrew (92797) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884806)

Controlling everything that your child does is not good parenting.

It depends on how old they are. When they're really small, NOT controlling everything they do is bad parenting. The older they get, the less supervision they require.

Silly moral panic (1)

Darkness404 (1287218) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883734)

I wonder, what will the next great "moral panic" be? Quite honestly, I hope this is the last one, because every "moral panic" only harms the world, does nothing to benefit it and there was never any harm to begin with.

Why is it that the masses and the media can't differentiate between real threats and panic?

Re:Silly moral panic (1)

Pojut (1027544) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883744)

Just wait until games reach fully interactive levels, a la holodecks.

Re:Silly moral panic (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33883850)

I know I can't!

Finally real-like girls in my parents basement!

Re:Silly moral panic (1)

BlackSnake112 (912158) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883878)

Just wait until games reach fully interactive levels, a la holodecks.

Well, that would mean fewer fat gamers. Which would be a good thing. Although, a holodeck version of WOW would be scary and funny all at the same time.

Re:Silly moral panic (4, Funny)

s73v3r (963317) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883908)

Just wait until you have to clean the holodecks.

Re:Silly moral panic (1)

Abstrackt (609015) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884578)

With punishment like that, it's no surprise there was very little crime on the Enterprise.

Re:Silly moral panic (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33883762)

Because most people cannot deal with reality so they need crisis to give their lives meaning.

Re:Silly moral panic (3, Insightful)

Thanshin (1188877) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883826)

Quite honestly, I hope this is the last one

I regretfully inform you that you're setting yourself up for disappointment.

Re:Silly moral panic (1)

_Sprocket_ (42527) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884000)

I wonder, what will the next great "moral panic" be?

Whatever it is, you can bet someone will market their product towards it or create a product to specifically cater to it.

Parental control and losing control (1, Insightful)

BadAnalogyGuy (945258) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883738)

The only way to lose control of your kids is to refuse to loose control of them. If they know you trust them, they will live up to your expectations. If they know you are watching them like a hawk, you'll find they will withdraw to places you can't find them.

Apple is absolutely wrong here. It isn't a technological problem these parents are dealing with. It is a parental problem.

Because filters have always worked before. (1)

dominion (3153) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883742)

Whew! There is *no* way kids will find a way around this. Problem: SOLVED! /s

I've said it before, but you can't always solve social problems with technological solutions, and here's a perfect example of that. Teenagers need to be informed about the permanence of the internet, the value of trust, and what the consequences of actions are. Beyond that, society needs to be more forgiving when kids screw up (which they can't help but do) and not brand them for life because of early mishaps.

Those are social solutions, setting up technological barriers without addressing the social problems and solutions, you're just making kids better at finding workarounds.

Re:Because filters have always worked before. (2, Insightful)

Jeremi (14640) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883766)

I, for one, am looking forward to the wave of creative new euphemisms this is going to spawn.

Re:Because filters have always worked before. (2, Insightful)

Darkness404 (1287218) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883890)

What needs to happen is that managers need to stop grading people on their behavior and focus instead on things related to work. Just because someone had a few drinks once and has some pictures on Facebook with them holding a beer doesn't make them not qualified.

When managers finally pull their head out of their buzzword-laced asses and realize that we are all humans, and that personal and private lives rarely are similar and simply give jobs to people who are qualified, this will be a non-issue.

If I was a manager, I wouldn't care if my applicant was a drunk, enjoys partying on the weekends and hell, so long as they showed up to work and got the work done decently, I couldn't care less if they showed up to work hungover in the morning.

But alas, I don't think I can handle all the buzzwords to become a manager.

Re:Because filters have always worked before. (1)

xaxa (988988) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884302)

In Britain so long as you don't turn up to work drunk I don't think anyone cares.

In America do you ever go out with your colleagues after work? If so, do people drink alcohol? It's normal here to all go to the pub if a colleague is leaving, or just on Friday. Typically the boss will pay [hrmagazine.co.uk] for at least some of the drinks.

I've seen my manager, his manager and the CIO drunk (usually when someone's retiring, as that's probably a better excuse for their respective partners). And also all the childless colleagues -- the ones with children tend to leave after one drink as they have commitments.

Re:Because filters have always worked before. (1)

sexconker (1179573) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884556)

When managers finally pull their head out of their buzzword-laced asses and realize that we are all humans, and that personal and private lives rarely are similar and simply give jobs to people who are qualified, this will be a non-issue.

No.
When managers finally pull their head out of their buzzword-laced asses and realize that we are all humans, they will force the remaining employees to design and build android slaves to replace the undesirable humans.

Entitled? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33883750)

Seriously? To what?

New Lingo (1)

Drakkenmensch (1255800) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883760)

Will it still intercept those messages when kids start inventing new words to have sexual meaning?

Re:New Lingo (1)

Pojut (1027544) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883800)

"So what happend with you and Suzy last night?"
"What else? We did the finances."

Re:New Lingo (2, Funny)

dgatwood (11270) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883948)

At least the iPhone camera will prevent them from texting the money shot....

Re:New Lingo (1)

Pojut (1027544) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883964)

HEY-OOOOOHHHHHH!!!! [instantrimshot.com]

Re:New Lingo (1)

Archangel Michael (180766) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884186)

So Suzy is a professional salesperson huh?

Re:New Lingo (1)

Pojut (1027544) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884220)

Indeed. She has a very...personal touch.

Oh That Is Freakin' Smurf! (1)

eldavojohn (898314) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883854)

Will it still intercept those messages when kids start inventing new words to have sexual meaning?

Child #1: Yo, man, that party last night was freakin', Smurf!
Child #2: You bet your smurf it was!
Child #1: Hey, I saw you leaving with Sheila.
Child #2: Yeah. Right when we left the party, she started smurfin' me.
Child #1: Shut the smurf up! Right in the smurfing parking lot?
Child #2: Oh, yeah.
Child #1: That's freakin' smurf!
Child #2: You betcha.
Child #1: Freakin' smurf.

(stolen from Family Guy [youtube.com] )

Re:New Lingo (1)

HungryHobo (1314109) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884196)

Why do you think the slang changes every generation?

Re:New Lingo (1)

Abstrackt (609015) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884618)

Will it still intercept those messages when kids start inventing new words to have sexual meaning?

I propose the following new word: instead of a blowjob they could call it a SteveJob.

They didn't really need it. (1)

MrCrassic (994046) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883786)

They could have let their iPhones keep replacing 'fuck' with 'duck'. :)

Re:They didn't really need it. (1)

einhverfr (238914) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884638)

duckhead! ;-)

You're? (0, Troll)

LearnToSpell (694184) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883794)

Sounds like you could use it, eldavo.

Blocked Jobs (-1, Flamebait)

digitaldc (879047) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883798)

Steve Jobs can no longer text his own name due to his own pet-peeves.

He will now be know as Steve Jahbs.

Huh? (2, Insightful)

areusche (1297613) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883804)

So the summary went from an anti sexting patent, some parental control application, to learning Spanish by changing the phone's default language, and finally to close a way to protect our celebrities from their antics.

I don't tend to complain about the summaries, but man I guess I am going to have to go and read the article now to make sense of this summary.

Re:Huh? (1)

Darkness404 (1287218) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883816)

See, /. knows that people don't read TFA, so they were thinking about licensing this technology to put the summaries in Spanish so we'd read TFA.

It's Censorship and/or Replacement of Text (2, Informative)

eldavojohn (898314) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883982)

So the summary went from an anti sexting patent, some parental control application, to learning Spanish by changing the phone's default language, and finally to close a way to protect our celebrities from their antics.

I don't tend to complain about the summaries, but man I guess I am going to have to go and read the article now to make sense of this summary.

Well, I apologize for the apparently incomprehensible summary. I didn't say anything at all about changing the phone's default language. The phone would just ensure that the child is sending or receiving messages with a certain amount of Spanish in them to ensure the child learns Spanish. Basically this patent could be used for censorship and/or replacement. That entails a lot of things and the patent itself alludes to a lot of possibilities. The media jumps on the 'think of the children' point of view but I tried to point out adults need it just as well. This could include anything from blocking certain folks from seeing certain words to replacing English words with Spanish in order to facilitate learning.

You're not going to read the patent but if you read the summary:

Systems, devices, and methods are provided for enabling a user to control the content of text-based messages sent to or received from an administered device. In some embodiments, a message will be blocked (incoming or outgoing) if the message includes forbidden content. In other embodiments, the objectionable content is removed from the message prior to transmission or as part of the receiving process. The content of such a message is controlled by filtering the message based on defined criteria. The criteria may be defined according to a parental control application. These techniques also may be used, in accordance with instructional embodiments, to require the administered devices to include certain text in messages. These embodiments might, for example, require that a certain number of Spanish words per day be included in e-mails for a child learning Spanish.

Of course given Apple's history, we can only wonder what kind of censorship they're trying to facilitate. It's about filtering text messages and e-mails (which I guess are starting to blend on smart phones). Sorry to stymie you with specific possibilities of what the patent could be used for.

Re:It's Censorship and/or Replacement of Text (1)

areusche (1297613) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884032)

Thanks for the reply to my post. I read the article, but I can tell you know I would be really annoyed if some kids started sending me text messages in Spanish.

Re:Huh? (1)

Abstrackt (609015) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884020)

Based on your comment and the title of TFS I think it's safe to assume kids are sexting in Spanish to get around a parental control application patented by Apple.

so apple wants app store like lock down for txt is (0)

Joe The Dragon (967727) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883856)

so apple wants app store like lock down for txt is voice next?

Just will make more people want to jail brake.

Re:so apple wants app store like lock down for txt (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884092)

Why would I jail my brakes? I like stopping.

Ineffective technology is ineffective (1)

kheldan (1460303) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883860)

It seems that with some things, people just don't learn. Online chat sites and forum sites, not to mention spam filters, have tried for years and years now to do exactly what Apple is trying to do, but determined people will just obfuscate censored words, use completely different words, euphemisms, or use leet-speak. Combine all the above and they may as well be speaking in Navajo (and I wouldn't put it past them to try that, too). Aside from practical considerations, isn't this just treating the symptom rather than addressing the problem?

Re:Ineffective technology is ineffective (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884252)

yes, it is treating the symptom, but Apple's goal isn't to solve the problem, it's to add a new feature that will make their gadget more attractive to people who want their symptoms reduced.

"Why sell one cure when I can sell millions of 'treatments'?"

Slashdot needs to license grammar check patents (3, Insightful)

recoiledsnake (879048) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883882)

"If you're parenting skills aren't up to snuff, Apple's got a patent on the device that will allow you to control what you child sends and receives.

I fail to see how this is novel (1)

Snotman (767894) | more than 3 years ago | (#33883904)

Auto-suggest and autocorrect exists electronically in many forms. Is it necessary to explicitly have a patent depending on the context it is used? That is ridiculous. I would think the novel concept is auto-suggest/correct and putting it in the context of SMS is just implementation details. Is there an auto-correct/censorship patent on smoke signals? If not, I think I better rush out and get it because that would be a novel concept.

Re:I fail to see how this is novel (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884666)

The USPTO will allow a patent for anything. Microsoft got a patent for GPU accelerated video encoding. GPUs for intensive tasks has been discussed and probably used for a long time now. GPUs excel at parallel processing, so um duh yeah I would use it for video encoding or brute force dictionary attacks, or other intense operations.

Even more telling in the patent application is its description. A "parental control application system" ... "filtering the message based on defined criteria". The only damn thing remotely unique about it is that it applies to SMS messages. The same patent can be used for MMO game chat systems, forums, blogs, wikis, web browsers, etc ad infinum.

From TFP:

'One problem with text-based communications is that there is no way to monitor and control text communications to make them user appropriate. '

Shit, this forum let's me type in shit? Or did it make my shitty comment user appropriate.

For f's sake the patent says dictionaries are ineffective. How would this "new invention" do it? Call a dictionary a text list I guess. Damn dictionary is ineffective, but this list of text with definitions is awesome.

'In response to the administrator identifying "Add From Predefined Text List" 710, the control application 158 can provide a display or set of displays suitable for allowing the administrator to select authorized text 704 from a predefined text list. In response to the administrator selecting an entry or entries from predefined text list 704 and, then, activating "Add" option 706, the control application 158 can add that entry to current authorized text list 704. In some embodiments, the control application 158 may update the predefined text list by transmitting and receiving data from a host or other client system, for example Apple.RTM. iTunes or an online dictionary.'

Dumb patent office is dumb. I should patent internet memes like the obvious statement and the soviet russia and all your whatever are belong to us. I wonder if I can apply for a patent about creating and running a patent office and then sue the USPTO.

And as already stated and painfully obvious to people with common sense, it will take kids all of 3 - 5 minutes to devise a system to work around the controls. They already get past filters everywhere else since this is not a unique idea or concept. Granted, I don't think Apple is this stupid to patent this thinking it will actually work. No, this patent like most others is simply a weapon in the arsenal to take out and use when some other company with a similar stupid patent tries to sue. Apple can now say "I see your stupid patent and raise you 10 stupid patents!".

iPhone: the phone for prudes (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33883932)

Thank god for Google.

Yup (1)

Bald-Headed Geek (524573) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884046)

Listening Bonita Farve????

Parents censoring for their own kids is fine. (1)

mr_mischief (456295) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884102)

Let people raise their kids. Unless they are some of the mentally ill who are an actual danger to their kids, they will do a better job of it than the government or a corporation. They know their kids better than you or I do and most parents intend at least to do the best for their kids. If they want to censor their kids' communications and monitor it to some extent, I'm fine with that. There is some point you have to teach your kids to have some integrity and to be trustworthy when you can't verify all their actions right away, but when that point comes varies by child. Any technology that helps a parent keep up with the technology their kids are using is great, as long as that's who is using it.

What's bad is when people get censored by the government or other powerful groups outside the rightful sphere of influence. Parents should be able to tell their kids what they can and can't read, watch, or say. Companies should be able to tell employees what they can and can't say on behalf of the company. Courts should be able to tell people they can't libel and slander. Police should be able to tell people they can't make death threats or harass people. Schools, employers, store or restaurant managers, social organizations, party hosts, and the hosts of any other gathering of people should be able to ask people to leave who as disruptive (although they shouldn't be able to have the people removed from public places nearby).

Voluntary censorship within your own organization is fine. Say it with me: "Voluntary censorship within your own organization is fine." Just like BDSM, it's when it's forced upon you that censorship is a problem.

Breaking News! (1)

C_Kode (102755) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884142)

Brett Favre just traded in his iPhone for an Android phone, story at 11. :)

Oh yeah. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884204)

Apple and parents outsmarting horny teens. Can someone please patent patenting moronic ideas and sue Steve's ass off??

Said before and said again (1, Insightful)

ThatsNotPudding (1045640) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884402)

Human sexuality terrifies Steve Jobs.

Parenting... (2, Insightful)

citoxE (1799926) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884562)

When it came to how I grew up, it was very lax, to say the least. I could go where I wanted, do what I wanted, and I never ended up getting in trouble, ever. No drugs, no nothing. It's when parents try to start controlling every little thing their kids do that they want to start lying and doing the things their parents tell them to do. PROTIP: Let them have some freedom once in a while. If you notice your child starts to become evasive when you ask them questions or just evasive in general, then it's time to intervene and ask them what's going on. But if your child thinks they're going to be punished or you're going to be disappointed if they tell you something, they won't do it. Teach them what's acceptable and what isn't and let them find out what happens after that. Don't treat them like babies and have them wearing diapers when they are 32.

another obvious patent (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884602)

is this yet another patent for something totally obvious?
"exists in Y, lets patent it for X"

Luddites (1)

esme (17526) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884636)

I really don't understand why any discussion of a new technology that might possibly be used to limit children in any way is accompanied by an immediate assumption that only terrible parents would use it. This seems like a very simplistic false choice between total freedom and BOFH-style lockdown.

It seems much more reasonable to me to give children freedom appropriate to their age, but also use tech to limit that freedom where that makes sense. Of course technology is no replacement for supervision or for judgement. Of course any technological limit can be broken or circumvented by someone with enough time and patience. But that doesn't mean there is absolutely no place for using tech to enforce rules.

-Esme

Grammar check eh? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 3 years ago | (#33884718)

I'm guessing you didn't text this summary in...

Other products are available (1)

fluor2 (242824) | more than 3 years ago | (#33884752)

Just a quick info on a product that is from a woman in my town here in Norway. I think this has a huge potential and is targeting parents with kids from 7-10 years old.

Bipper.com [bipper.com] is a simple sim-card with a the code included in the sim-card that makes you monitor and select who can call and text your children etc. There is also a code the child can call and then the phone will call persons in a ring until one answers. The location of the phone will also be sent. Since it's all on the sim-card it will work on most phones, even old phones that you most probably will give your youngsters.

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