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Can Analytics Help Fix Your Love Life?

samzenpus posted about 3 years ago | from the 13%-increase-in-kissing-this-month dept.

Social Networks 73

d2ncal wrote in to tell us about a new service that takes all the guess work out of a relationship by providing you with timely feedback, and charts to see how your affection is trending. TheIcebreak was created by Christina Brodbeck and Dwipal Desai, who gave up their jobs at YouTube to create the relationship quantifying service. The pair have gone to great lengths to become relationship experts by doing things such as: reading books on relationships, and enlisting the help of a couples therapist, to ensure that the data collected is useful to your long term love life. The service is free now, and Android and iPhone apps are coming soon."

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Takes the guess work out? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37057290)

Where's the fun in that? ;)

Re:Takes the guess work out? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37058250)

There's no guessing involved. She's angry at you, and you always did something wrong. Just apologize.

Re:Takes the guess work out? (1)

cayenne8 (626475) | about 3 years ago | (#37059226)

Actually, the better way for a guy to improve his love life is pretty simple.

1. Go out and fucking approach all the women you can. Every woman you see that you have an interest in...approach her and talk to her. It goes help to learn how to talk to women, but that will come, go out and start every day, even if it is only saying 'hello' or asking the time. When you engage them in conversation...listen to them, and one easy way to talk to them, is get them to talk the most!!

No woman ever was out with a guy and complained that she talked about herself too much.

2. Project confidence in yourself. Doing step #1 will start you off in that direction. You had the 'guts' that most of the other guys in the general area didn't have. Woman dig a man that projects confidence in themselves, and how they make their way through life. Until you are really confident...fake it, it works.

3. Try to at least watch your general hygiene, and appearance. You don't have to be Brad Pitt...but don't smell bad, or dress like a homeless person on the street. You don't have to be the best looking guy in the world....thankfully, women are much more forgiving of a male's appearance than we are of them in general. I call it the Billy Joel syndrome...when he was nailing Christie Brinkley who was one of the hottest women in the world at the time. Sure the money helped...but you see my point. How often do you see a good looking chick on the arm of a guy that isn't the best in the world? Yes, some of them might be rich, but the majority are not. They have decent appearances, a good sense of humor and other qualities like I mentioned above.

But seriously, the main thing is...to quit being shy. Do what it takes to get over that....I don't ever remember anyone spontaneously exploding for walking up to speak to a strange woman and trying to meet her. The WORST that can happen is...she's not interested...but so, what? The one right beside her might just be. There's tons of them out there.

If nothing else...play it as a 'numbers' game...hit on every one that interests you...and you will get laid, will get new friends, and after seeing a lot of them, you'll come across one that has traits you might like to settle down with.

It just isn't as hard as people try to make it out to be to themselves.

Re:Takes the guess work out? (1)

zwei2stein (782480) | about 3 years ago | (#37059582)

Do not overdo 1).

You will come across as desperate. Especially if your future target sees you hitting on someone else several times before. Small sub-community (workplace, school... ) is no-no for this approach.

On other accounts, you are right. Stop being shy and you will get laid. You will be suprised how much success you will have.

Hard part is not asking girl out on date and then getting her to bed. It is after you start dating.

Re:Takes the guess work out? (1)

cayenne8 (626475) | about 3 years ago | (#37059800)

Do not overdo 1).

You will come across as desperate.

I agree...I was assuming one would act according to the situation...no, you don't go down the wall lined with women asking each one and moving to the next one in line.

I'm talking in general during life. You see tons of women out there while moving through your day each day...see one, approach. If that doesn't work..wait a little, and you'll see a new one that hasn't seen your previous interaction.

Desperation, NO..women definitely do not react to that. Projecting confidence will mean you're not projecting desperation. You need to engage them...and basically get them to try to present THEIR value to YOU. That takes a little practice...but it works. You need to be the one they WANT to be with....have them offer YOU their number after talking with them awhile. Things like that also help with women who quite often do retro-justification for their actions. "I must have thought he was cute since I offered my phone number to him"....etc.

Re:Takes the guess work out? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37059818)

But seriously, the main thing is...to quit being shy.

Yeah. Then you could become a musical prodigy and elite athlete, and grow a few inches taller while you're at it.
IT'S THAT SIMPLE!

Re:Takes the guess work out? (1)

cayenne8 (626475) | about 3 years ago | (#37060366)

Yeah. Then you could become a musical prodigy and elite athlete, and grow a few inches taller while you're at it. IT'S THAT SIMPLE!

With possibly a VERY few exceptions that might be out there...I don't think shyness, especially a guy being afraid to approach women is genetic. You might be born with genes to become an uber-athlete, or grow tall or be a musical progidy....

But I'd dare say unless you are mentally malformed....99% of guys out there CAN change this learned behavior. You just have to realize if a woman shows no interest to you, or even (very rarely) is outright mean and distainful to you...it isn't the end of the world and you won't die. If nothing else, learn from each rejection, and see if you can change your gameplan and adjust your approach for the next one.

Remember, unless you get married...there's always gonna be a 'next' one.

Re:Takes the guess work out? (1)

mattack2 (1165421) | about 3 years ago | (#37074690)

I call it the Billy Joel syndrome...when he was nailing Christie Brinkley who was one of the hottest women in the world at the time. Sure the money helped...but you see my point.

I think Ric Ocasek and Paulina Porizkova is a much better example (far bigger gap between them).

This software must be broken (2)

elrous0 (869638) | about 3 years ago | (#37057300)

I entered all my info and now all it ever responds with is "Outlook not so good" every time I ask it for advice on improving my love life.

Re:This software must be broken (1)

snowraver1 (1052510) | about 3 years ago | (#37057390)

Hmm... Whenever I ask for love, it always says "Ask again later", then rolls over and goes to sleep.

Re:This software must be broken (1)

Samantha Wright (1324923) | about 3 years ago | (#37057522)

Maybe you should try Eudora or Thunderbird? ;)

Re:This software must be broken (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37057746)

How about Pine [washington.edu] for those still on dusty terminals?

Re:This software must be broken (1)

tloh (451585) | about 3 years ago | (#37058664)

Given that we are talking about the underlying drive for reproductive success, the obvious solution is Evolution, wouldn't you agree?

Re:This software must be broken (1)

Samantha Wright (1324923) | about 3 years ago | (#37059078)

Alas! If only I had known about it beforehand. I will use this rendition in the future. Thank you.

Re:This software must be broken (1)

tloh (451585) | about 3 years ago | (#37060234)

You're welcome! In more ways than one - I just took a quick glance at your comment history. Folks with decent expertise in the biological sciences are far and few here. Slashdot is lucky to have you! ;-)

Re:This software must be broken (1)

Samantha Wright (1324923) | about 3 years ago | (#37060292)

Signatures truly are a powerful medium, it seems.

Re:This software must be broken (1)

tloh (451585) | about 3 years ago | (#37060546)

Actually, yours was slightly off-putting, but perhaps your intent was to parody a stereotype rather than perpetuate it. That's why I bothered to look into your comment history to figure out what your deal really was. No harm done.

You *did* get me to look, though. Memo to sig: Mission accomplished.

Re:This software must be broken (1)

Samantha Wright (1324923) | about 3 years ago | (#37060646)

It's kind of in beta; up until a few hours ago I had a bad joke about regular expressions instead ("How did the regex cross the road?" "^.*$"). Any suggestions on improvements will be gracefully accepted!

Re:This software must be broken (1)

tloh (451585) | about 3 years ago | (#37061560)

Samantha, *you* are the ultimate authority on what image/impression you want to project. (^_^) If you're an in-your-face confrontational kind of gal, anything that has to do with politics or religion (or nerd tribalism on slashdot) will never fail to disappoint (or offend). If it was me and I wanted to showcase the intersection of my code geek side with my bio geek side, I'd maybe go with something like:

--
A template in the language of life:
AUG - /* insert code here */ - TAG
--

I myself chose to go with the slightly eccentric to the casual observer. But anyone who chooses to ponder my words will appreciate my respect for the things in our world that truly nurtures intellect and sapience. Or maybe they'll think I'm being too cheesy. (because of the milk.... never mind.) I suppose evaluation of my intended interpretation can go south depending on the observer. ("I got layers. Wanna undress me?") But I'm less obsessed over controlling what others think than I am about meeting kindreds who understand and share my vision. If you would indulge me, I'd like to quote a little "Babylon 5" to help you decide:

Who are you?
What do you want?
Where are you going?

good luck!

Re:This software must be broken (1)

garatheus (993376) | about 3 years ago | (#37061818)

By golly, completely off topic [reply], but thanks for an interesting read. Made me almost spray my G&T all over my computer screen re: template in the language of life.

*sigh* I should try get out more often...

Re:This software must be broken (1)

user flynn (236683) | about 3 years ago | (#37059738)

Given that we are talking about the underlying drive for reproductive success, the obvious solution is Evolution, wouldn't you agree?

Shocking. Before I could click "join" Theicebreak recommended I remove myself from the gene-pool.

    Incidentally, can anyone tell me what happens if it lets you click join? It won't allow me to, no matter what computer I use or proxy I go through.

Re:This software must be broken (1)

jd2112 (1535857) | about 3 years ago | (#37059324)

I entered all my info and now all it ever responds with is "Outlook not so good" every time I ask it for advice on improving my love life.

Are you sure you didn't acidentially go to the Magic 8 Ball site instead?

Re:This software must be broken (1)

DoofusOfDeath (636671) | about 3 years ago | (#37060172)

"Outlook not so good"

Freakin' open-source zealots...

Re:This software must be broken (1)

genner (694963) | about 3 years ago | (#37061478)

I entered all my info and now all it ever responds with is "Outlook not so good" every time I ask it for advice on improving my love life.

Get a real email client. Problem solved.

Re:This software must be broken (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37065742)

Lucky you. I just get a "division by zero" error.

Re:This software must be broken (1)

k4b (2433856) | about 3 years ago | (#37105282)

“dashboard that shows your happiness over time, and how it compares to the relative bliss of other couples” [goo.gl] Sounds like the HOV lane to exactly the kind of gross self-destructive overanalytical behavior that rocks many relationships in the first place–another way to wallow in misery online. I think at-risk couples would do better to spend less time in front of glowing screens and more time in bed without clothes.

Some problems can't be fixed. (1)

grimmjeeper (2301232) | about 3 years ago | (#37057372)

I'm a computer geek to the core. Nothing can fix my love life.

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (1)

ph0rk (118461) | about 3 years ago | (#37058166)

You need to have a love life for it to be fixable. Sorry.

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (1)

ciderbrew (1860166) | about 3 years ago | (#37058286)

What love got to go with it?

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (1)

ciderbrew (1860166) | about 3 years ago | (#37058584)

I'm unable to quote Tina Turner songs or just stupid and need to go home. bye

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37060616)

That's the real problem

How can a geek get a love life?

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37058738)

I'm a computer geek to the core. Nothing can fix my love life.

http://www.newegg.ca/Product/Product.aspx?Item=N82E16896630001

Get this, it fixed my relationship, not joking.

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37058980)

Solution is to find mate who is also a geek.

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (1)

grimmjeeper (2301232) | about 3 years ago | (#37059276)

That's great but both of the geek women in the world are already spoken for. And I'm not gay so the rest of the single geeks out there don't interest me.

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (1)

antdude (79039) | about 3 years ago | (#37059952)

I am disabled and a hardcore virgin geek/nerd, and over 35. :(

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (1)

Surt (22457) | about 3 years ago | (#37060770)

I'm pretty sure that's a fetish category, so you may be in luck.

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (1)

antdude (79039) | about 3 years ago | (#37060826)

Prove it. :P

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (1, Insightful)

DoofusOfDeath (636671) | about 3 years ago | (#37060186)

I'm a computer geek to the core. Nothing can fix my love life.

Work on being an excellent person. Love will almost certainly follow.

Re:Some problems can't be fixed. (2)

grimmjeeper (2301232) | about 3 years ago | (#37062654)

I speak multiple languages, even ones that are made up. I can tell you everything you never wanted to know about the history of the Jeep. I can write code that makes a computer get up and dance. I can quote Monty Python off the top of my head for days without repeating myself. How much more excellence can there be in one man? And why can the women not see this excellence?

And yes, this bit of sarcasm was brought to you in order to emphasize the joke that was my first post...

Simple answer is trending down (1)

Bob the Super Hamste (1152367) | about 3 years ago | (#37057374)

It is a really simple algorithm they used, since you visited their site your relationship is trending down. Even more so if you get the app.

OkTrends (1)

Musically_ut (1054312) | about 3 years ago | (#37057452)

If you are interested in statistical analysis applied to your love-life, you should care to look at OkTrends [okcupid.com] as well.

And perhaps you should know that it may not be the best idea all the time. [smbc-comics.com]

Re:OkTrends (1)

16384 (21672) | about 3 years ago | (#37057540)

Oblig. xkcd http://xkcd.com/523/ [xkcd.com]

Third-party analysis? (1)

AliasMarlowe (1042386) | about 3 years ago | (#37057460)

If your relationship really needs analysis by a disinterested or arm's-length third party to survive and flourish, then perhaps at least one of you is rather narcissistic [wikipedia.org] or has Aspberger's [wikipedia.org] or some other social maladjustment. Fair enough in those cases (although such persons might not necessarily either seek or follow good advice), but not very compelling for the rest of us.

Re:Third-party analysis? (1)

Anomalyst (742352) | about 3 years ago | (#37058390)

some other social maladjustment

We read /. you insensitive clod.

Re:Third-party analysis? (1)

somepunk (720296) | about 3 years ago | (#37058438)

So you're saying that all you "normal" people are really relationship experts? Lots of people have relationship
problems, and a helpful tip or two might be the deciding factor in marginal cases. Even if your relationship is a happy one, who wouldn't want to grab some low hanging fruit (snickersnack!) and pump it up a notch?

Thumbing your nose at free (possibly useful) advice concerning as aspect of your life you presumably care about sounds like maladjusted behavior to me!

Re:Third-party analysis? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37058476)

Now that you mention it, I recently realized that I very likely do have Aspberger's (or something similar), and my girlfriend is indeed rather narcissistic (or at least very self-absorbed). We recently signed up for couples therapy because we want our relationship to survive and flourish.

I just signed up for the site mention in this story, it's not particularly impressive. I think the questions are more likely to incite animosity. For example, "Who is more romantic?" She is not romantic, having me point this out to her is not in any way beneficial to our relationship. The question has no point except to emphasize a fault to those who value romance.

Obvious answer (3, Funny)

Nidi62 (1525137) | about 3 years ago | (#37057478)

If you have to use an analytics app to gauge how your relationship is doing and get suggestions, then you are probably already beyond help.

Re:Obvious answer (2)

archen (447353) | about 3 years ago | (#37058764)

I'd actually think the reverse is true. Relationships which are most doomed to fail are the ones where people refuse to fix their problems. For that matter these people are often delusional and tell themselves that everything is just fine. Just because a relationship appears healthy doesn't mean there are things lurking beneath the surface which will doom it. Occasionally asking yourself if there are signs of danger, or what you can improve upon is a good thing to do but often not obvious. Sometimes listening to outside advice is a good thing. Usually this duty is relegated to friends and relatives, but many people fall into traps so common that a computer really could warn people about some of them.

Re:Obvious answer (1)

flabordec (984984) | about 3 years ago | (#37060416)

Yeah... In the same way if you have to use analytics tools and measure how your enterprise is doing and get suggestions from experts, then you are probably already beyond help. </sarcasm>

Re:Obvious answer (1)

RJFerret (1279530) | about 3 years ago | (#37064410)

Analytics???

Ohhh! Per what I saw between my browser tab and then opening it, "Can Anal" ... "Fix Your Love Life?"

It's just one part of the whole.

Short Answer: (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37057510)

Divide by zero.

How about a wacky idea! (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37057524)

How about you, now hold on to something this will come as a shock, TALK TO YOUR PARTNER! Yep, the old yip-yap! You might find out that you have so little in common you hate each other more and go off and find someone else! Alright it's tough but at least you'll know immediatley and talking won't cost you a dime!

On the other hand you may find you have some great laughs and next thing you know you may find you've been togther for 20 years ( like me an my Missus ) and still find, just by talking, that after all that time you still enjoy each others company!

Sounds like nothing but trouble (1)

bigsexyjoe (581721) | about 3 years ago | (#37057674)

A site asks you and your SO questions and predicts your happiness over time? I don't think this is going do any good for your love life. Just love and support your SO and make your own happiness.

Re:Sounds like nothing but trouble (1)

Gaygirlie (1657131) | about 3 years ago | (#37057946)

Well, I just tried it simply out of curiosity and for the heck of it: it merely asks you to gauge how you feel about how things have been going during the last 7 days, and apparently you'll get to fill the same gauges again after a week. Oh, and then it's filled with the "social" aspect where you can chat with other users about your ratings.

Luckily I've never needed these kinds of things, I can't really be much more satisfied with my relationship. Then again, I use common sense and just _talk_ things out, both of which most people these days seem incapable of doing.

Expert by... (1)

Neil_Brown (1568845) | about 3 years ago | (#37057730)

doing things such as: reading books on relationships

Whilst some things can be learned from books (law being a reasonable example), and many things can be improved through learning from books, I'm not wholly convinced that one can become an expert on relationships by reading books about relationships - it strikes me as a field in which expertise would require actual, real world experience?

Re:Expert by... (1)

jd2112 (1535857) | about 3 years ago | (#37059374)

doing things such as: reading books on relationships

Whilst some things can be learned from books (law being a reasonable example), and many things can be improved through learning from books, I'm not wholly convinced that one can become an expert on relationships by reading books about relationships - it strikes me as a field in which expertise would require actual, real world experience?

Why is it that most of the books on relationships have been written by people who have been divorced multiple times?

Re:Expert by... (1)

Webcommando (755831) | about 3 years ago | (#37059556)

Why is it that most of the books on relationships have been written by people who have been divorced multiple times?

Maybe it is that old adage at work: You learn more from your failures than your successes. Or maybe they spent so much time writing the book and trying to solve other people's problem they ignored their own!

Re:Expert by... (1)

hiryuu (125210) | about 3 years ago | (#37061536)

Maybe it is that old adage at work: You learn more from your failures than your successes.

Hi. I'll venture forth with the embarrassing revelation that I'm in my mid-thirties, have been divorced twice, and am on marriage number three. I can't say that failure is a better instructor than success, or that success has less to teach, but that, for the willing and appropriately humbled, failure can teach you a lot of really important things.

Failed relationships hurt. They involve a lot of different personal and social dynamics. They give a lot of great examples of stress-test cases for how we react, feel, and behave toward ourselves and the people closest to us. There's some pride-swallowing involved, and by necessity one must play devil's advocate with a lot of core beliefs and assumptions. "What could I have done differently to make this work? What did I do that I regret doing, or that made things worse? What made me feel this way, and what made the other person feel/act the way they did?"

Personally, I learned that a lot of my beliefs about and understandings of what makes for healthy relationships, as formed in my childhood and teen years, was just plain wrong. I had to teach myself how to detach from a bad situation to look at it more objectively than I could in the heat of emotional response. I learned to start applying the same basic problem-solving processes and forward-thinking that I've picked up in my professional and business life to how I interact and communicate with my loved ones. Most importantly, I've better learned to live by acceptance and understanding rather than denial or inflexibility.

I'm not saying it takes failure to learn how to be healthy and in a healthy relationship - but if you weren't lucky enough to learn how to do it before ending up with problems, then reading about how others learned from their mistakes has a lot of potential to help.

Re:Expert by... (1)

Tepic++ (221291) | about 3 years ago | (#37062008)

Assuming you're aiming for a life-long monogamous relationship, I've always felt that you're best off understanding one good way to succeed rather than exploring the infinite ways you can fail.

Re:Expert by... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37059420)

Yes, if they really wanted to be experts, they'd try *becoming* couples therapists, or social psychologists, rather than getting their help.

It's an interesting idea, but this sort of attitude is plaguing everything--you don't become an expert just by reading about something or talking to other experts.

Maybe if they keep this up, in several years I might consider them experts, but making an app does not make you an expert.

Will you get married? (2)

Culture20 (968837) | about 3 years ago | (#37057778)

Text your name and your crush's name to 555-uztupid! Brought to you by the people that think you're stupid enough to buy a ringtone you heard on TV for $5.

Statistics... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 3 years ago | (#37057788)

...Mean little to an individual.

Weird. (1)

drolli (522659) | about 3 years ago | (#37057896)

It for sure can fix the problem that singles are better consumers.

Third party love analytics is an exoskeleton! (1)

Anomalyst (742352) | about 3 years ago | (#37058516)

According to the tag.

No! (1)

mikem170 (698970) | about 3 years ago | (#37059412)

Love and analytics have little to do with each other.

Emotions and logic are separate domains.

Anything that sparks communication (1)

shuz (706678) | about 3 years ago | (#37059610)

It is my belief that any input that sparks communication between you and your SO will ultimately have a positive effect on your relationship. That is that if the two of you both passionately believe that you are in it for the longhaul then it will allow you two to discuss each others desires and frustrations. If there is uncertainty or a major disconnect communication of these things could end the relationship sooner so that each person can move on with their lives. For those couples where one or both are introverted this type of service could help give feedback without either of the persons feeling like they are exposing themselves. It achieves this because it does not give feedback in a person X did wrong.

No, but... (1)

Sarusa (104047) | about 3 years ago | (#37060054)

If it keeps you thinking about it instead of just taking your partner for granted, that might be plenty.

Nope! (1)

organgtool (966989) | about 3 years ago | (#37060076)

Can analytics help fix your love life?

NOTHING can fix that train wreck.

10 easy steps to a fruitful love life... (2, Insightful)

DemonGenius (2247652) | about 3 years ago | (#37060780)

1) Hold yourself to a high standard (hygiene, fashion, confidence [the real kind, not the knock-all-others-down-a-peg kind], health, well-roundedness [have lots of other things to do than obsess over girls and sex])

2) Pay attention to her every nuance, her reactions to what you say and do, her favorite ice-cream or wine, where she likes to be touched, anything. Everything she does is data to be stored in your internal database. Pay attention to detail like you do with code, it's an underrated talent that programmers have but don't apply to anything else IRL.

3) Do not internalize, you will only shoot yourself down

4) Make her miss you, be available, but not too available, YMMV depending on her interest

5) Know when to call it quits and move on, some girls will appreciate your company while others will give an inch while they take your mile.

6) Don't be negative and don't rant about shit she obviously isn't interested in. Some girls DO think nerds are cute, even hot ones, but don't want to hear a long-winded passage about the Prime Directive (whatever that is, I'm a Star Wars fan :p)

7) Layman's terms, layman's terms, layman's terms, I can't stress this enough. You can't connect with a girl if you can't relate to her. Even with layman's terms, most of our professions are still to complicated to understand. They are just fine with hearing that you really love your job and consider it like an art form and how your work helps people (depending on the profession, that is).

8) Clean your house, make it spotless and keep it that way. Your living quarters are a reflection of who you are as a person, and girls pick up on this.

9) Money is (almost) no object, IF the girl appreciates it. Don't look cheap, but don't look desperate either. Pay for her dinner, get her good seats to the hockey game, etc. Be wary of gold diggers (see #5)

10) Get help from someone more experienced than you who is willing to help you (someone who isn't a PUA who only cares about getting into panties anyway, they fail at just about everything else regarding women). Search the internet, but be wary of the sources. Advice from men has priority over advice from women by a huge margin. Ignore tips from movies, TV, romance novels, your mom at all possible costs!

*Coming from 15+ years experience of being an abject failure at romance, and finally getting some well deserved poetic justice :)

Re:10 easy steps to a fruitful love life... (1)

CCarrot (1562079) | about 3 years ago | (#37063414)

2) Pay attention to her every nuance, her reactions to what you say and do, her favorite ice-cream or wine, where she likes to be touched, anything. Everything she does is data to be stored in your internal database. Pay attention to detail like you do with code, it's an underrated talent that programmers have but don't apply to anything else IRL.

Also useful advice for the aspiring stalker-on-the-go! Seriously, sometimes having someone scrutinize your every move and memorize your every preference can be pretty off-putting. Some women like this, some don't, just like guys. YMMV.

7) Layman's terms, layman's terms, layman's terms, I can't stress this enough. You can't connect with a girl if you can't relate to her. Even with layman's terms, most of our professions are still to complicated to understand. They are just fine with hearing that you really love your job and consider it like an art form and how your work helps people (depending on the profession, that is).

Or, you know, look for a woman who's into the same things you are...not all women get bored discussing code optimization ;)

1) Hold yourself to a high standard (hygiene, fashion, confidence [the real kind, not the knock-all-others-down-a-peg kind], health, well-roundedness [have lots of other things to do than obsess over girls and sex])

Yes! The more interests you have (not 'pretend to have', but actually, truly enjoy), the more likely you'll have something in common. My husband and I enjoy picking apart the latest Star Trek movie for flaws as much as we like traveling, diving, or seeking out the perfect cup of coffee. Sure, I prefer console over MMORPG, but it would be boring if we were only interested in the exact same things! ;) Try many things, and if you enjoy it, keep doing it!

6) Don't be negative and don't rant about shit she obviously isn't interested in. Some girls DO think nerds are cute, even hot ones, but don't want to hear a long-winded passage about the Prime Directive (whatever that is, I'm a Star Wars fan :p)

You get a gold star for this one. Seldom have I seen truer words on /. Negativity is/should be a big warning bell for you, as well as for her. Who wants to be with someone who just bitches and moans all day, or who can't stop telling stories about how they 'really showed that guy!'? Trust me, it's as tedious in jocks as it is in geeks.

Overall, pretty good summary! ;)

Re:10 easy steps to a fruitful love life... (1)

JonySuede (1908576) | about 3 years ago | (#37088000)

that is funny since I did the total opposite and it is great :
I act like a total douche with my woman : I order her, I spank her, I am the king of my kingdom and fuck: it works great.

I used to be all sensitive and emo, but one day, about 8 years ago, I said fuck it I am a man and a man I meant to dominate a woman. You know what, it worked, women likes bad guys, they appreciate that you love theirs intellect but they love it when you love theirs body and comment it in rough and naughty ways.

Btw I only dated people that have a master or more. And I am into the fifth year of my current relationship,

My first thought after reading the summary (1)

downhole (831621) | about 3 years ago | (#37061244)

Who are these people to be giving love advice? According to the summary, their supposed expertise consists of "reading books on relationships" (How many, and which ones?) and "enlisting the help of a couples therapist" (What, like one? What are the qualifications of this supposed couples therapist?).

In case any of you guys haven't figured it out yet, 90% of people trying to give you advice on any subject are completely full of shit, including the authors of books and therapists. In anything related to love and relationships, there's even more bullshit. My advice is: Find people in your real life that have the kind of relationships you want, and get advice from them. Ignore anyone who claims to be an expert until they have proven themselves to you, either through their advice matching your real-life experience, or you personally witnessing them having the kind of relationships you want with the kind of people that you want.

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