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Navy May Use Mine-Detecting Dolphins In the Straight of Hormuz

Soulskill posted more than 2 years ago | from the more-effective-than-mutated-sea-bass dept.

The Military 204

New submitter cervesaebraciator writes "The Atlantic Wire reports that the Navy has a tested solution to the possible mining of the Strait of Hormuz. The Navy has 80 dolphins in San Diego Bay trained to use their own sonar to detect mines. When they find the mines, the dolphins drop an acoustic transponder nearby, so that human divers might return to defuse it. Retired Adm. Tim Keating cannot say, however, whether the dolphins will be used in the Straight." The Obama administration has reportedly warned Iran that closing the Strait would provoke an American response.

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Sharks instead? (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704562)

With lasers of course...

Re:Sharks instead? (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704592)

(a) Sharks don't have sonars; (b) Would you really want to train a shark?

Re:Sharks instead? (5, Funny)

giorgist (1208992) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704602)

(a) Sharks don't have sonars;
But they have lasers
(b) Would you really want to train a shark?
Yes

Re:Sharks instead? (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704668)

(a) Sharks don't have sonars;

They do if you install one on them.

They already got lasers.

Re:Sharks instead? (4, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704732)

Sharks do have Electroreception [wikipedia.org] though, which would be a really cool sense to be able to harness if sharks were trainable.

Re:Sharks instead? (4, Funny)

John Bresnahan (638668) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704818)

(a) Sharks don't have sonars; (b) Would you really want to train a shark?

I thought they all went to law school?

Re:Sharks instead? (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704918)

Training sharks is a very expensive business - it cost me an arm and a leg...

Re:Sharks instead? (1)

sosume (680416) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705538)

someone is missing a cultural reference [youtube.com] ..

Re:Sharks instead? (0)

Penguinshit (591885) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704636)

"With friggin' lasers..."

Fixed that for you.

Re:Sharks instead? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705194)

LOL NATALIE PORTMAN AND HOT GRITS TO AM I RITE???

Slashdot... where the 15 year old memes are still considered funny.

Re:Sharks instead? (4, Insightful)

Noughmad (1044096) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705256)

That's because they actually are funny, unlike most of the new crap.

Re:Sharks instead? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705848)

That would be the Iranian counter move. Lasers are expensive so their sharks spray authentic Egyptian humus instead of the evil Israeli knock-off one.

straight straits (5, Informative)

mrvan (973822) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704568)

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20081210140645AADMNkG [yahoo.com]

Whats the difference between Straight and Strait?
Straight, as in a line without a waver or curve.
Strait: "A strait is a narrow, navigable channel of water that connects two larger navigable bodies of water. "

And for the love of foreigners, if you guys do something about your spelling issues, please remove unsounded letters (like the "gh" in straight"), don't add any more of them. That's just cheating at scrabble!

Re:straight straits (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704744)

I personally prefer str8 or as it pertains to water str8-up.

Re:straight straits (5, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704914)

It's a legacy of English being the bastard love child of all the languages that passed through western Europe. Strait and Straight have different etymologies, so they've inherited the spellings that evolved from their respective parent languages. Strait comes from the Old French "estreit", whereas straight comes from Anglo-Saxon "streccan". Give it another few hundred years and they'll standardise on something spelt similar to both (my guess would be "strate")

Re:straight straits (2)

chilvence (1210312) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704986)

Yes, why not preserve the silent e and the sliding 'ai'.. or better yet, lets pronounce it! strah... teh.. hmm yes

Re:straight straits (2)

Phrogman (80473) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705130)

I prefer "straet" myself :P

Re:straight straits (4, Funny)

sa1lnr (669048) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705474)

Thank-you for setting the record strait. :)

Re:straight straits (2)

DriedClexler (814907) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705742)

And for the love of foreigners, if you guys do something about your spelling issues, please remove unsounded letters (like the "gh" in straight"), don't add any more of them.

Not to change the topic too badly, but if you're concerned with unsounded letters in major languages, it's French you should be worried about. They seem to take a policy of "last three letters are optional -- hope you didn't learn the language just from speech!"

The Straight (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704570)

Maybe if talking straight didn't work, we could use someone with an exceptionally camp voice to warn Iran about our sharks with laserbeams, that ought to keep the strait open.

Dolphins ... right. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704578)

You'd think that in 2012 with all the processing power and miniaturization cheaply available these day's, they'd have a better and cheaper solution. No offense, but those dolphins probably cost millions to raise and train, hell, it's the reason why they'll use divers instead of dolphins, because they'll be more expendable.

Re:Dolphins ... right. (5, Insightful)

magnusrex1280 (1075361) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704584)

Given how intelligent dolphins are, and how much technology and money it would take to replicate the functions and capabilities of a living creature, I don't think your view plays out. You talk about how expensive it would be to train dolphins, but it would be many more times expensive to use hardware instead.

Re:Dolphins ... right. (5, Funny)

93 Escort Wagon (326346) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704764)

Given how intelligent dolphins are, and how much technology and money it would take to replicate the functions and capabilities of a living creature, I don't think your view plays out. You talk about how expensive it would be to train dolphins, but it would be many more times expensive to use hardware instead.

I work at a university, and this is yet another case where the world should look to academia for the solution.

You need a cheap yet intelligent work force that's willing to work long hours and isn't overly picky about working conditions? That's easy - that's what grad students are for. They're easily replaceable too!

Re:Dolphins ... right. (2)

Phrogman (80473) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705144)

Grad Students are just the larval form of Interns in the business world.

Re:Dolphins ... right. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705814)

You need a cheap yet intelligent work force that's willing to work long hours and isn't overly picky about working conditions? That's easy - that's what grad students are for.

I was going to suggest Bangalore, but that would be too easy.

PETA (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704904)

Given how intelligent dolphins are, and how much technology and money it would take to replicate the functions and capabilities of a living creature, I don't think your view plays out. You talk about how expensive it would be to train dolphins, but it would be many more times expensive to use hardware instead.

We could use members of PETA.

They're all vegans and therefore are skinnier than shit and wouldn't have any sonar profile.

They're all super angry so if we told them that the Iranians were using mines to kill cute cuddly something or anothers, they'd be out there with sledge hammers.

And then if we provided "proof" that the Iranians used dead (by clubbing) baby seals, well that'd be the end of that!

Imagine an army of waifs storming into Iran.

Re:PETA (1)

lightknight (213164) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705526)

If Red Alert 2 has taught me anything, the Allies get dolphins, and the Soviets get giant squids.

Re:Dolphins ... right. (1)

AHuxley (892839) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704662)

Most of the world would have nice new fancy plastic minesweepers/minehunters/MCMV? Why the dolphins? Some green PR for recruitment?
Will the dream of working with cute dolphins sign up more smart kids from the malls?

Re:Dolphins ... right. (1)

Martin Blank (154261) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705504)

New fancy plastic minesweepers are still easily targeted by missile or gun. Dolphins are harder to find and even if you do find them, you can't be sure that you're looking at one from the US Navy until you actually haul the carcass aboard.

Re:Dolphins ... right. (2)

Dunbal (464142) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704858)

No offense, but those dolphins probably cost millions to raise and train

You really don't understand how defense contracting works, do you? They cost millions to raise and train, and the government is billed for billions in "biological mine locator units (BMLU's)".

Re:Dolphins ... right. (1)

gatkinso (15975) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705026)

Better, cheaper, faster... pick none.

Re:Dolphins ... right. (1)

elsurexiste (1758620) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705316)

Except the Military has been training and using dolphins for decades, so why waste your investment?. Check this over-the-top story [guardian.co.uk] from The Guardian.

inb4peta (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704582)

I can just imagine the brouhaha that PETA will kick up over this.

Given how intelligent dolphins are, I'm not surprised they could be trained to do this. It does come off as vaguely crackpot territory nowadays to use animals for something so precise, but hell, we still haven't made anything better than dogs for sniffing out bombs, right?

Re:inb4peta (2)

Oxford_Comma_Lover (1679530) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704612)

I can just imagine the brouhaha that PETA will kick up over this.

If we go to war with Iran, I feel like PETA will not find a very receptive audience to said brouhaha.

Besides, Dolphins are cooler than nukes. They have sex for fun and are the second most intelligent creatures on the planet.

Re:inb4peta (5, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704708)

They have sex for fun

They also force their ladies to have sexy times through which is rape! The more you know! ===* [youtube.com]

second most intelligent creatures on the planet.

“For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much—the wheel, New York, wars and so on—whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man—for precisely the same reasons.”

Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Re:inb4peta (1)

aurelianito (684162) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704958)

Mod parent up! Best dolphin quote ever!

“For instance, on the planet Earth, man had always assumed that he was more intelligent than dolphins because he had achieved so much—the wheel, New York, wars and so on—whilst all the dolphins had ever done was muck about in the water having a good time. But conversely, the dolphins had always believed that they were far more intelligent than man—for precisely the same reasons.”

Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Re:inb4peta (2)

MichaelSmith (789609) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704710)

are the second most intelligent creatures on the planet.

Makes me wonder why they allow a third rate species push them around.

Re:inb4peta (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704808)

are the second most intelligent creatures on the planet.

Makes me wonder why they allow a third rate species push them around.

This has been bothering me lately. If we evolved from monkeys, why are they so stupid? Why is it only dogs and dolphins are the only ones smart enough to understand when a human points to an object? There seems to be an intelligence 'gap' that is not explained...else there would be monkeys displaying a lot more 'smarts' than they currently do. Something does not add up.

Further, why has there not been other evolutions from other species? Why only monkeys, when they clearly are not the smartest beasts in the wild? Extreme coincidence or manipulation from an outside force?

Re:inb4peta (1)

indeterminator (1829904) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704876)

This has been bothering me lately. If we evolved from monkeys, why are they so stupid?

When jumping from one tree to another, bigger (and heavier) brain is not an advantage in selection.

Re:inb4peta (1)

indeterminator (1829904) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704890)

And I'm apparently guilty of trying to rationalize with a creationist, without noticing it myself.

Re:inb4peta (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704928)

And I'm apparently guilty of trying to rationalize with a creationist, without noticing it myself.

You said it, not me. Issues much?

Re:inb4peta (-1, Troll)

JockTroll (996521) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704926)

Loserboy nerd, we didn't "evolve from monkeys", humans share common ancestry with all other primates. Anyone who has ever dealt with animals will tell you most of them can understand when you're pointing at an object - given the right training. And about intelligence, they're smart enough to live in an environment that would kill you tech-dependant copronanists in minutes. Every species rises to the level of intelligence it needs to function and survive in nature, we're the only ones who manage to crap over the environment and think it's actually us exceeding our limits. Dismissed, loserboy.

Re:inb4peta (1)

cupantae (1304123) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704988)

Anyone who has ever dealt with animals will tell you most of them can understand when you're pointing at an object

And anyone who has ever dealt with creationists will tell you most of them are no more intelligent than any other primate

Re:inb4peta (-1)

JockTroll (996521) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705094)

Who failed evolution, you or me? "We evolved from monkeys" is the over-exemplification used my deluded creationists in order to discredit the theory of evolution. Evolution doesn't state that humans are evolved monkeys, it states that both come from the same ancestors, just like common cats and tigers. When you've stopped knee-jerking off pick up a book and read it, then bend over backwards and piss up your nostrils so that turd you have for a brain will have something to float in.

Re:inb4peta (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705192)

wow...it was just a question and I never claimed to be an expert. I also never mentioned creationism though I did not rule it out either. Maybe Aliens? lol.

Anyway, enjoy your lonely life. loser. plz do not breed.

Re:inb4peta (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705510)

We didn't evolve from monkeys. You idiot. Go read, gee, I don't know, the fucking INTRODUCTION to any book on evolution, and you'll learn what we actually evolved from, us and monkeys both.

What a friggin' retard. I'm beginning to think Devo was right.

Re:inb4peta (1)

TFAFalcon (1839122) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705658)

It's not that monkeys and primates are not smart. They just have the (understandable) tendency to rip pieces of flesh of off people who try to make them bring back the ball for the zillionth time.

Re:inb4peta (1)

JockTroll (996521) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704900)

Makes me wonder why they allow a third rate species push them around.

Two words: free fish.

Re:inb4peta (1)

JockTroll (996521) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704840)

If we go to war with Iran, I feel like PETA will not find a very receptive audience to said brouhaha.

Besides, Dolphins are cooler than nukes. They have sex for fun and are the second most intelligent creatures on the planet.

You mean they're second most intelligent after the killer whale? They also do other cool things, like killing for the sake of it.

Re:inb4peta (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705408)

The "Killer Whale" (or Orca) is in the family Delphinidae, so is actually closer to a dolphin than a whale.

Re:inb4peta (1)

BlueParrot (965239) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705032)

are the second most intelligent creatures on the planet.

Depends a lot on how you measure intelligence. Chimpanzees and other apes give most
animals decent competition. Some of them have been taught to read, count and occasionally
even invent new words for things people have not taught them.

Also, animals in general tend to be more intelligent than people think. Most people get
surprised when the learn that it's quite possible to train goldfish to perform tricks.

Re:inb4peta (1)

Zemran (3101) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705040)

the second most intelligent creatures on the planet

and which species gets the #1 spot? Ants?

So long... (5, Funny)

speps (1108625) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704586)

... and thanks for all the oil !

Potential problem. (4, Insightful)

SuricouRaven (1897204) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704606)

Dolphins are a recognised Cute Animal. People like them. People love them. People have made a TV series around one. Some people practically worship them. If a dolphin is killed in action, the public outcry is unpredictable. Maybe it'll be nothing at all, maybe it'll be worse than a human casualty - after all, people expect those. KIA dolphins are unprecidented, there is no telling how it will go PR-wise. Other than that PETA is probably already writing their first letter of complaint, of course.

Re:Potential problem. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704638)

Doubt it - if the U.S. lost 80 dolphins in one afternoon and they start a war over it, that is an insult to the Cute Animals and YAUSH (yet another U.S. hypocracy)

Watch http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Cove_(film) [wikipedia.org]

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1313104/ [imdb.com]

An amazing documentary no less.

Re:Potential problem. (1)

AHuxley (892839) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704682)

An enemy missile hitting the dolphin transport pen/vessel?
It would be like the 1982 Hyde Park and Regent's Park bombings all over again.

I doubt it. (2, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704706)

No matter how many dolphin friendly tuna have been trained, dolphins still die by the hundred each year in monofilament drift nets.

If we really want to save the dolphins, we need to give up eating tuna. Despite all the whining from PETA on that subject, there has been minimal effect. The death of brave dolphin fighters in protecting the god-given right to cheap oil will have a similar effect.

Nothing.

Poor bloody dolphins.

Re:I doubt it. (4, Insightful)

SuricouRaven (1897204) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704814)

Every month on roads in the US, a number of people are killed approximatly equal to the deaths in the September 11 attacks. People care a lot more about deaths caused by deliberate action than they do about deaths occuring by accidents. This holds true for animals as well: There is also news fatigue: Once something like tuna-fishing has been going on long enough, people lose the ability to care.

Re:I doubt it. (1)

drinkypoo (153816) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705162)

There is also news fatigue: Once something like tuna-fishing has been going on long enough, people lose the ability to care.

There is also delicious, delicious tuna in a can for a buck.*

* (due to the state of the economy, the can of tuna still costs a buck, but it has shrunk by about a third...)

Re:Potential problem. (1)

jcreus (2547928) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704816)

Or as a strategic point: "Look how bad they are! They are killing dolphins!".

I dislike this... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704620)

Although I'd support bombing Irans nuclear sites (as long as no bankrupting occupation went with it) putting ignorant dolphins in a war seems rather wrong... especially since the USA could probably do without them considering the difference in naval power. Reminds me of the bat bomb things.

Re:I dislike this... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704748)

Did you support hunting for WMDs in Iraq?

Re:I dislike this... (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704842)

Well, they did use chemical weapons on Iran, so they obviously did have them.

And, the Clinton administration was confident that they were trying to develop more, buy Clinton was too busy with other things to worry about the war that was running throughout the eight years of his administration.

How about a novel solution? (3, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704642)

You know, for the Americans to but the hell out of other countries business and look at their own issues instead.

Stop waging war on the peoples of this planet (those that have oil at least) and you might find your place in the world moves up from itinerant and hated troublemaker to respected citizen.

Hard I know aftrer so many decades of poking your nose it's not welcome... but hell, give it a try.

Re:How about a novel solution? (1)

AHuxley (892839) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704768)

Just wait for amazing new facts surrounding: .... Pan Am Flight 103, how Saddam's Iraq was invaded, who really attacked the USS Liberty, who helped with the USS Pueblo, had ships in the Gulf of Tonkin, sent engineers to Grenada, trained the mysterious “John Doe” who worked with Timothy McVeigh, set up the Fast and Furious gunrunning, likes beheading diplomats, impersonates CIA agents... trained the pilots that ... have nuclear ..... , programmed Stuxnet...

Re:How about a novel solution? (4, Insightful)

Spy Handler (822350) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704776)

and if sprinkling fairy dust on rainbows begets unicorns and world peace, everyone could live in love and harmony!

However, we live in the real world. The big dogs on the block always push little ones around. Been like that since the first homo erectus climbed down from the trees. You think the any of the previous powers were "respected citizens" that "minded their own business"? How about the British empire? Soviet? Chinese? French? (yes the French were actually a major power as recently as the 19th century)

As far as US goes, it's actually quite benign in comparison to every other dominant power that came before it. What do you think the (insert empire name) would've done in (insert troublespot name)?

But anyhow it looks like all you USA haters will be getting your wish soon. America is declining fast, and the next big dog seems to be lining up to take its place already. You probably know who that is.

But be careful what you wish for.

Re:How about a novel solution? (1)

couchslug (175151) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705296)

"You think the any of the previous powers were "respected citizens" that "minded their own business"

Examine how Islam itself spread. No unicorns involved.

Re:How about a novel solution? (1)

DigiShaman (671371) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705776)

At the tip of a sword. Thankfully the West invented the gun. And we should all remember the ol saying. Never bring a knife to a gun fight. Trouble with the West however is that it's effectively using their guns for clubbing and not shooting.

Re:How about a novel solution? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705440)

If you think blocking that strait will only affect the US then you're a moron.

Sorry, make that a fucking moron because there are other countries where practically their entire GDP flows through there.

Re:How about a novel solution? (0)

khallow (566160) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705788)

You know, for the Americans to but the hell out of other countries business and look at their own issues instead.

That works nicely until your business has become our issue. Which is how those US wars start.

Dear America (1, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704654)

Nobody voted you the worlds police, and we're tired of your warmongering and sticking your nose where it doesnt belong. F*ckoff and die plx or vote for Ron Paul, kthx

Gracefully yours,

A peaceful citizen of a country you probably couldn't point to on a map.

Re:Dear America (2)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704728)

Telling us to fuck off and die isn't very endearing. Despite what you think some of us are actually knowledgeable about geography. Also the actions of our government have since long ago not been a representation of the will of our people. Though anyone who knows anything about our government would realize that putting mines in the way of our boats or attacking them is a sure fire way to end up with your country invaded. Ever stop to think that both sides want this war? That is probably really what is going on.

and (2)

unity100 (970058) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705306)

. Also the actions of our government have since long ago not been a representation of the will of our people.

what are you going to do about that ?

Re:and (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705646)

Completely internal revolutions rarely work. Are you currently lobbying your government to attack the United States and liberate it's oppressed populace? No? What do you want us to do? Suicide bomb the capital building? Democrats and Republicans are both heavily invested in preserving the status quo. Without a billionaire or at least several millionaires backing it a third party has no chance to break into national politics. All the rich people, well, they're rich, why would they want to shake things up? I'm all for constructive criticism but it needs to provide us with options or a plan of some sort. Telling Americans "Your country is screwed up, fix it!" doesn't really move us towards a solution. I want to see Americans free from the Military and Prison Industrial Complexes as much as anybody, I just don't know how.

So, to the rest of the world..

Help us! Please?

Re:and (2)

unity100 (970058) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705758)

revolutions start with individuals. the very first thing you need to realize and do should be to understand why this system is as it is, and what is the main factor for its existence. when you identify and externalize that cause, you can refrain from participating in creating that cause/factor and call on others to do it too. once you remove the cause, the effect will also go away.

I'll sign the above without being AC (5, Insightful)

F69631 (2421974) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704796)

I can't say that I oppose all USA military operations: I actually think that what they did (and led other nations to do) in Libya was pretty great. I bet we're going to see a lot more problems in that area (Be it terrorism, hanging on the edge of another civil war or just another dictator grabbing the power after a while) but it was still a joint operation by the international community, intended to help people who wanted to overthrow a dictator.

That said... It's hard to deny that a lot of the problems in the area are also more or less directly caused by the USA. It's a very militaristic nation, with a very large and loud minority(?) of islamophobes and every few years it demonstrates that it still reserves itself the right to attack any nation there for whatever reason it wants to, whether or not they have the support of the international community and whether or not those reasons even make sense.

Whenever any dictator faces an uprising or any terrorist organization faces opposition from the locals, the first thing they say "Those are just agents of USA messing around" and the problem is... that doesn't sound as far-fetched as it should. USA foreign policy has been very effective in painting the nation as an evil empire against which the Arabs should unite. I'm not saying that there wouldn't be terrorist nutjobs if not for USA but I am saying that they have more support and credibility due to actions by USA. As far as I'm aware, the main platform of Ahmadinejad is rallying against USA: He gains support during conflicts like these and loses it when people direct their attention to internal affairs.

Re:I'll sign the above without being AC (1)

Mojo66 (1131579) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704854)

Couldn't have said it better. Too bad I have no mod points right now.

Re:I'll sign the above without being AC (2)

Colin Smith (2679) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704990)

Re:I'll sign the above without being AC (4, Insightful)

Phrogman (80473) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705206)

Its very simple really: when trying to determine WHY the US has taken military action of some sort - look to see which US Corporations will benefit the most and you have found the *real* reason the US is dropping bombs. Oh, there are some exceptions - at the micro level (killing Bin Laden for instance was a political coups for the sitting President), but on the macro level, it is always economics I think.
Not that this marks it as different from just about any other country, but the US is the one country in the world that is more or less *always* at war somewhere. If they don't get drawn into one, they start it.
I am sure there will be some conflict with Iran, its just too perfect for the military industrial complex in the US. The US isn't in any other war at the moment, and a new war with a new opponent is a great way to ensure a lot of US corporations make big bank - at the expense of all those honest US soldiers who have to conduct it mind you.
I have BTW massive respect for the US military and its heroic members (despite a few exceptions), but they don't make the policy, they just have to carry it out.

Re:I'll sign the above without being AC (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705532)

I actually think that what they did (and led other nations to do) in Libya was pretty great.

I know those are all nitpick-y details to you, but I wish the president got permission from Congress, as he is theoretically supposed to. That really spoils the action that may have been, indeed, a good thing. There is no guarantee that the next such action won't be a lot worse.

Re:I'll sign the above without being AC (2)

tomhath (637240) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705818)

Pointing to the Arab Spring as "pretty great" kind of overlooks the fact that it wouldn't have been possible if the dictators thought they could slaughter any who opposed them. How many hundred thousand Kurds and Iraqis were killed by Saddam? Nobody know for sure. You think Mubarak or Qaddaffi couldn't have crushed those uprisings with force fifteen years ago?

We're here for a reason (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704972)

Nobody voted you the worlds police, ...

We were appointed in 1946 because some Europeans were worried that the USSR was coming to pick up where the Germans (The guys who started the wars from the mid 19th to the early 20th century) left off..

There are quite a few Asians who are grateful we kicked Japan's ass and that we kept the Soviets from continuing with that job,

But, I agree with RON PAUL. Our job is ended, we're broke, and I am tired of the rest of the World taking advantage of us.

Problems with sectarian or ethnic violence spilling over into your nice little country? Man up baby.

So, the Serbs and Croatians want to go at it again because their idiot feud and it threatening to spill over into your little neck of the World? Man up baby!

Some asshole strongman next door to your country decides that he wants your land and he marches in with his latest Russian made weapons? I'm sure your little peaceful country has some token itsy bitsy military with a couple of fighter jets and you'll probably put up a valiant fight for a few minutes and then resort to decades of guerrilla warfare and whatnot.

Until the rest of the World mans up and the we stop putting up with assholes countries like Saudi Arabia, Zimbabwe and other African countries with their assholes, and most of all Israel who's existence is to stir the pot in the Middle East, it looks we're here to stay as the World Police.

Personally, I have no problem if a couple of dipshit peoples want to kill each other: Serbs/Croats, Palestinians/Jews, Persians/Arabs, Hutus/Tutsis whatever .....fuck'em! They're all dirtbags.

Re:Dear America (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705740)

given the aggressive 'policing' the USA does, do you *really* want Americans to be able to find your country on a map?

Dear random whiny person (2)

Sycraft-fu (314770) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705770)

Sorry, but this is something that affects America and thus America has a right to respond. If nothing else, America has an economic interest in the oil continuing to flow.

Further, they wouldn't be the only one. If Iran closed the strait they would have to invade Oman's waters to do so (as part of it is in there) and thus would defacto declare war on Oman. Then of course there's the fact that UNCLOS provides that it isn't legal to close down the strait just because you want to. Iran would be violating international law.

So while the US would probably have the biggest response, on account of having the largest military and the most near by, they wouldn't be the only ones. The EU would join in, as would other Middle Eastern nations, who have not only an economic interest, but an interest in not letting Iran violate the sovereignty of another nation in that region (remembering that Iran is Persian, not Arab and there's little love lost between those two).

So sorry if you don't like it, but the US is in the right here. Free transit of the ocean is an international right, and the strait is part of that. Iran doesn't get to close it down just because their feelings are hurt, and the US would be legally in the right to respond.

Simple countermeasure - use anti-personnel mines (5, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704672)

Except in this case the personnel are dolphins.

Should be simple enough to rig one in ten of your mines with an acoustic package that responds to the presence of a Dolphin sonar frequency fingerprint by detonating. Need to be careful that it doesn't respond to a ship playing back Dolphin frequencies on its active sonar.

From what I understand about the sensitivity of marine mammals to extreme Sonar sound pressure - you wouldn't even need it to detonate - just let out a couple of sonic farts at 140db should deafen the Dolphins permanently. I'm sure the Navy has a nice retirement program for deaf Dolphins. Not like the US Navy could complain - no worse than they do during a typical navel exercise with the active sonar on their submarines and ships.

Always more marine mammals in the sea.

Re:Simple countermeasure - use anti-personnel mine (5, Funny)

Fusselwurm (1033286) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704878)

[...] during a typical navel exercise [...]

you made my day here

Obama to Iran: (4, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38704718)

"This is what I say to Iran. Let me be absolutely clear. If you close the Strait of Hormuz you are making the choice to put innocent dolphins in harms way. The American people will hold YOU responsible for their deaths. Think carefully."

Red Alert 2 ? (1)

Haedrian (1676506) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704804)

And I thought the attack dolphins in that game were silly.

Coulnt monkeys be trained for the military too? (2)

digitaldude99 (1861666) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704828)

Monkeys are as smart as dolphins. Why doesnt someone teach them to use guns? then we could get people out of harms way. What you would do is first fo all locate your enemy with reconnaisance planes then drop some bananas over them and unleash the monkeys. They would naturally move towards the bannanas. It would probably be hard to teach a monkey to target troops of a particular country, so when they were sent in the friendly troops would have to get out of the way.

Does it actually work? (4, Interesting)

Arrepiadd (688829) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704844)

I once saw a tv show where they talked about these military dolphins. I can't recall what the program was, but the outcome wasn't that great. They basically said the dolphins, being such intelligent creatures, sometimes actually lied for the fun of it. Unlike the dogs who simply do what they're told, the dolphins actually played with the rules and would say no mine was there even if they knew they were spotted as being lying.

Maybe the psychological side of the training has evolved since then, or maybe it was just a campaign of misinformation, but if it's actually true, doesn't sound too great for this theory...

Re:Does it actually work? (2)

dotar (1400363) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705828)

I've heard this too, also that the training worked a little too well, in that the dolphins used to bring the mines back to the ships....

Iran has its own Dolphins too (1)

ConaxConax (1886430) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704868)

Iran bought dolphins from Ukraine [bbc.co.uk] in 2000.
Weren't dolphins also deployed in 2003? I recall a story about them being loosed in the sea and then just swimming off to freedom, but as I'm having trouble finding links to any such story maybe it is misremebered.
From the TFA I think this is interesting

Former Admiral KEATING: They are astounding in their ability to detect underwater objects.
NPR's TOM BOWMAN: Dolphins were sent to the Persian Gulf as part of the American invasion force in Iraq.
KEATING: I'd rather not talk about whether we used them or not. They were present in theater.
BOWMAN: But you can't say whether you used them or not.
KEATING: I'd rather not.

Iranians will hijack the dolphins (1)

dmesg0 (1342071) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704880)

It worked well with a drone, I see no reason why they won't do the same with the dolphins.
After the capture they'll proudly demonstrate to the entire world what american dolphin infidels look like, and then send them for reverse engineering in China and Russia.

Pa love Fa? (2)

gatkinso (15975) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704978)

OK fine, I'm old as dirt.

STRAIT, not Straight (2)

EmagGeek (574360) | more than 2 years ago | (#38704994)

It's a body of water, not an adjective indicating co-linearity.

DADT got repealed (1)

Arancaytar (966377) | more than 2 years ago | (#38705028)

"Straight" is politically incorrect. It's the "Heterosexual of Hormuz".

(Or "Strait of Hormuz" if you want to be pedantic about it.)

ENGLISH, motherfucker, can you SPELL IT? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705034)

The poster could AT LEAST bothered to read the linked articles - fuck, even just the TITLES would have pointed out the correct spelling of "strait"...

FRIST pSOT (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705212)

Users. This is our ab1lity to

strait (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#38705314)

It's STRAIT of Hormuz, not STRAIGHT.

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