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335 comments

Hahahahaha (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056357)

She's a fat Chinese bitch. Oh well.

Re:Hahahahaha (5, Funny)

jellomizer (103300) | about 2 years ago | (#40056419)

As you sit alone. Lonely and Miserable.

Re:Hahahahaha (0, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056439)

As you sit alone. Lonely and Miserable.

That that is the future awaiting Zuckerberg was exactly his point, I think.

Re:Hahahahaha (1, Flamebait)

ArcherB (796902) | about 2 years ago | (#40056447)

She's a fat Chinese bitch. Oh well.

Quit changing your status to "It's Complicated". You're a damn booty call!

ANd a Doctor (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056479)

She's a fat Chinese bitch. Oh well.

FB is going to be worthless soon and SHE's going to wish the HE signed a prenup.

Re:ANd a Doctor (-1)

moozey (2437812) | about 2 years ago | (#40056511)

FB is going to be worthless soon.

That's cute.

Re:ANd a Doctor (5, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056727)

Napster is great, everyone uses it, it's going to be around for ever!
Yahoo! is great, everyone uses it, it's going to be around for ever!
MySpace is great, everyone uses it, it's going to be around for ever!

Later...

Facebook is great, everyone uses it, it's going to be around for ever!

She so horny... (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40057041)

...she love him long time!

--Ethanol-fueled

Re:ANd a Doctor (1, Redundant)

craigminah (1885846) | about 2 years ago | (#40056751)

FB is cool which is partly why it's so popular...other reason is it fills a niche that people craved. I think once FB tried to monetize itself and put ads everywhere the coolness will wear off and people will move elsewhere (e.g. Google+ or an unknown alternative).

Re:ANd a Doctor (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056843)

Wow, you don't understand how this works. Even if FB is worthless in a decade he will still have money, personally...not nearly as much borrowing power and worth on paper but plenty of actual money. Also as long as they've been together it probably doesn't matter that much.

Re:Hahahahaha (2)

Ihmhi (1206036) | about 2 years ago | (#40056633)

Well, I'm not sure about the "bitch" part seeing as I know pretty much nothing about her, but I wouldn't exactly call her fat [popcrunch.com] .

Re:Hahahahaha (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056767)

The bitch is fat. She's at least 40 pounds overweight. I take it you're American so you probably think this is normal.

Re:Hahahahaha (5, Funny)

Loosifur (954968) | about 2 years ago | (#40057049)

40 pounds? It might seem strange to you, given your...perspective...but heterosexual men aren't really attracted to anorexic models. Yes, they're easy to drape clothes on, which I'm sure comes in handy in your profession, but they don't really look, well, feminine. Again, not something you're concerned about, but the rest of us kinda dig chicks, see?

Re:Hahahahaha (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056731)

Will their kid be a Chike or a Kink?

longtime girlfriend? (0, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056363)

isn't that marriage?

Re:longtime girlfriend? (5, Funny)

Nidi62 (1525137) | about 2 years ago | (#40056597)

isn't that marriage?

No. When you have a girlfriend you're still having sex.

Re:longtime girlfriend? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056799)

Amen brother

Re:longtime girlfriend? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056857)

plus one for truth

Re:longtime girlfriend? (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056837)

Fuckerbergs have sex after marriage

Re:longtime girlfriend? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056973)

The studies have shown that married people have more sex than the unmarried

If you're subscribed to him.. (5, Insightful)

Severus Snape (2376318) | about 2 years ago | (#40056367)

on facebook you'll already know this. If you aren't, chances are you don't care.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (4, Funny)

jellomizer (103300) | about 2 years ago | (#40056403)

I agree Facebook is too mainstream to be news for nerds. If he married a Robot or an executive from Google. That may be a little different.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056505)

What if he married an Android executive from Google? Would that make twice the difference?

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (5, Insightful)

rainmouse (1784278) | about 2 years ago | (#40056587)

If he married a Robot or an executive from Google. That may be a little different.

I dunno I found it somewhat interesting. Looking at some pictures of his new wife shows her to be rather plain looking [zimbio.com] and frequently struggling with her weight. I find myself constantly looking for reasons to hate the guy, but at least respect is due to someone who marries his pre-fame college sweetheart when he could likely take his pick from just about any of the top millionaire supermodels.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (0)

AngryDeuce (2205124) | about 2 years ago | (#40056711)

but at least respect is due to someone who marries his pre-fame college sweetheart when he could likely take his pick from just about any of the top millionaire supermodels.

Don't worry, I'm sure when they get divorced in a few years, he'll move on to the top millionaire supermodel.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (2)

Jah-Wren Ryel (80510) | about 2 years ago | (#40056739)

respect is due to someone who marries his pre-fame college sweetheart when he could likely take his pick from just about any of the top millionaire supermodels.

On the other hand, millionaire supermodels come with all kinds of headaches that a normal girl doesn't. Whose to say he won't get as much strange as he wants even now - isn't that what facebook is for anyhow?

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40057007)

If he married a Robot or an executive from Google. That may be a little different.

I dunno I found it somewhat interesting. Looking at some pictures of his new wife shows her to be rather plain looking [zimbio.com] and frequently struggling with her weight. I find myself constantly looking for reasons to hate the guy, but at least respect is due to someone who marries his pre-fame college sweetheart when he could likely take his pick from just about any of the top millionaire supermodels.

Hate to break it to you, but some guys like stocky women...

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (2)

tokul (682258) | about 2 years ago | (#40057061)

when he could likely take his pick from just about any of the top millionaire supermodels

What are you looking for in your future wife? Long time companion or some cardboard beauty, who will be gone 5 years later with half of your estate.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (5, Funny)

Intrepid imaginaut (1970940) | about 2 years ago | (#40056461)

Well this news should satisfy both those that wish him well, and those that wish him pain and suffering.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (1)

aurispector (530273) | about 2 years ago | (#40056733)

Why would you wish him either? Most people don't have any actual personal connections to him.

The thing that makes facebook (and the internet in general) kind of silly is the artificial way it bring us closer, without actually doing so.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (3, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056465)

Rich guys, remember this and never forget it: if she signs a prenup, it means she really loves you and doesn't plan to divorce. If she won't sign, she loves your money and status.

If she talks about how "unromantic" a prenup is, watch out! Women resort to emotional appeal when you successfully point out they make no logical sense.

I mean marriage itself is pretty unromantic when you think about it. Marriage is "yeah we could decide just to be together, you and me, on our own... but wait! let's add a contract with the government because legal systems and licenses are soooo romantic!" A prenup is really just a variation.

Gentlemen, the time to settle everything is before you say "I do" because you are a man and family courts HATE men and want them to suffer. She gets half your stuff even if she didn't earn a dime of it, guess that's the vagina tax? She automatically gets any kids unless you can prove she's a crack dealer and even then... Don't even get me started on alimony - she has this supposed "right" to "get used to a lifestyle" you provided. Yeah well you got used to a lifestyle she provided too, but is the court going to mandate she come give you a BJ every now and then? No, they won't.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (0, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056515)

Marriage is nothing but a vestige of the days when the church ruled the governments of the world that has only held on as long as it has because of the tax benefits involved. Dump the tax benefits of marriage and watch the marriage rate plummet overnight.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (5, Insightful)

Rich0 (548339) | about 2 years ago | (#40056555)

Marriage...has only held on as long as it has because of the tax benefits involved. Dump the tax benefits of marriage and watch the marriage rate plummet overnight.

Not sure I can buy into this side of your argument. When you consider everything involved, do you really think that people get married primarily for tax reasons? Half the people who get married spend so much on the event that I find it hard to believe that they ever recoup that in taxes unless they make $200k/yr or something.

Tons of marriages are between people in their mid-20s who barely have jobs let alone a grasp of tax accounting.

I think the main driver for marriage is tradition and pressure by family to conform to social norms. That, and nobody in love really wants to plan for the incredibly unlikely event that something will go wrong.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (4, Insightful)

BasilBrush (643681) | about 2 years ago | (#40056881)

I think the main driver for marriage is tradition and pressure by family to conform to social norms.

For men.

For women, they've mostly been dreaming about their wedding day and married bliss since they were children. It's the fairy tale dream come true. And that's why they consider no expense is too much for the wedding day.

Yes, I generalise. That's what men do.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (5, Insightful)

In hydraulis (1318473) | about 2 years ago | (#40056945)

For women, they've mostly been dreaming about their wedding day and married bliss since they were children.

And why?

Because they've had this "dream" pounded into their heads since the day of their birth by their equally-brainwashed mothers.

Same deal with the perceived need to have kids. Gotta get those buns in the oven, you know. How many times have you seen mummy's little girl pushing along a wee toy pram with a wee baby doll in it? Who brought that damned and damning prop into the kid's life?

Looks like tradition (in its worst guise) and familial pressure to me.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (2)

edmicman (830206) | about 2 years ago | (#40056673)

So far the tax advantages of marriage seem to be only geared toward single-income families, couples where one person makes the majority of the income, or families with children. As two professionals with no kids (DINKS!) we repeatedly got screwed over on our taxes. Maybe this was partially because of the complexity of the withholding system or something, but all I know is that in the end we've ended up owing a ton almost every time.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (1)

BasilBrush (643681) | about 2 years ago | (#40056893)

I'd be surprised if you were paying more tax than if you were both single. No matter where you are in the world.

So it's hard to see how you're being screwed on taxes.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (3, Informative)

SScorpio (595836) | about 2 years ago | (#40057011)

As professionals are either of you self employed? This changes how the taxes you owe will appears to you as you will see all the money getting paid and have to do quarterly estimates, etc.

But if you both work jobs where taxes are automatically deducted from a pay check, simply choosing one for the number of dependents for both of you should put you right where you need to be.

You do still get screwed over if you own a home because if you were living together but not married you could file separately and do a itemized deduction on one of your taxes, and tax a standard deduction on the other. You can't do that when you're married.

Re:If you're subscribed to him.. (1)

Sir_Sri (199544) | about 2 years ago | (#40056991)

There is a fairly interesting question of what legal rights she has to facebook ownership based on their relationship, whether or not they count as common law (which given that they've been living together for some time they might) and what that would imply, if the timing of the marriage specifically would include or exclude her from being able to claim a chunk of assets etc.

Not that the article addresses any of those. But those would make for an interesting /. article because they apply equally well whether your company just IPO'd at 100 billion dollars or 100 000 dollars, and happen to be topical based on current events.

The article basically says 'have a prenup because Donald Trump says so'. The interesting questions are all about what could or could not be in the prenup given their current (and past) status. Sure, he could probably have written in an exclusion that she can't make any future claims against any inheritance he has from his parents. But that's a boring pittance compared to how much money he just made.

Who cares? (0, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056383)

Who cares? Is this becoming a gossip website?

I don't care about facebook (I don't have an IQ low enough to join), and I couldn't care less about zuckerberg's private life.

Re:Who cares? (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056413)

Don't you mean you don't have any friends, so what's the point?

Re:Who cares? (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056475)

No, I meant that I don't have friends with low GPAs, read this:
http://www.time.com/time/business/article/0,8599,1891111,00.html [time.com]

Anyways, it's funny: a couple of years ago people who didn't watch reality shows were considered "anti-social", now those who don't have a facebook account. I guess that the kind of "audience" is the same. I don't "like" them, sorry.

Re:Who cares? (4, Insightful)

AngryDeuce (2205124) | about 2 years ago | (#40056545)

As if 99% of the people on the average Facebook junkie's friend's list are actually "friends" in the first place.

Facebook has taken the word 'friend' and perverted it to mean anyone you've ever spoken to in your life, at any point of your life, from kindergarten to present, and the sick thing is, people actually are starting to think of those people as their friends.

GP was being a douche, I'll grant that, but let's not pretend that Facebook friends are actually friends in the true meaning of the word. People collect friends on Facebook like they're Pokemon...

Re:Who cares? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056611)

Someone with 487 'friends' must have taken offence to this comment.

Re:Who cares? (2, Insightful)

jellomizer (103300) | about 2 years ago | (#40056431)

But you care enough to post a comment about it.

Re:Who cares? (2)

Crasoose (1621969) | about 2 years ago | (#40056495)

Are you saying you're too lazy to add spam filters in your email? Make your discontent known now with a comment and maybe in the future you won't have to browse over an article like this again.

Re:Who cares? (2)

moozey (2437812) | about 2 years ago | (#40056497)

I agree with your first sentiment.

As for insulting 800+ million people because they happen to use a website that you don't like? Stop being a pretentious knob and quit worrying about things you apparently don't care for.

Is this "stuff that matters?" (4, Insightful)

betterunixthanunix (980855) | about 2 years ago | (#40056389)

Is this "news for nerds?"

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056437)

"Nerd gets married", how is this not news? There is hope for us all!

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (4, Funny)

BasilBrush (643681) | about 2 years ago | (#40056899)

It is a relief he got married. A nerd with a girlfriend was an unsettling phenomenon.

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (1)

Asic Eng (193332) | about 2 years ago | (#40056925)

Indeed there is hope for us all. Most of us nerds find the prospect of coding a website which eventually nets a billion dollars, less daunting than the idea of talking to a girl. Who knew it could be that easy?

Hmmm ... I think a new tech boom might be just around the corner.

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (1)

six025 (714064) | about 2 years ago | (#40056449)

Is this "news for nerds?"

Is this "news for anyone" besides Zuckberg, his wife, family and friends? FFS :(

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056519)

No. Mathew Zuikenbergers marital status has no relevancy.

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (1)

hcs_$reboot (1536101) | about 2 years ago | (#40056517)

Is this "stuff that matters?"

Whatever touches Facebook is dispatched worldwide instantly. /. collects what's so seemingly interesting and offers us to comment on it. Including, as you did, to wonder "should this really make the top lines?"...

Vote with your clicks (2)

dejanc (1528235) | about 2 years ago | (#40056625)

If you don't like a piece of news on Slashdot, I think the best idea is not to open it. As far as Slashdot is concerned, you are just +1 in their visitor log. If this news didn't get any comments or views, it would be the best filter against this kind of stories in the future.

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (0)

slasho81 (455509) | about 2 years ago | (#40056697)

It's news for nerds because it implies that if Zuckerberg can get married, then so can we.

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056729)

There is hope! It can happen for you, too!

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056735)

It is because a nerds is now getting laid.

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056887)

I think you misunderstand how marriage works.

Re:Is this "stuff that matters?" (1)

hort_wort (1401963) | about 2 years ago | (#40056803)

This is educational. It's meant to show the rest of us how long we can expect to stay married if we become rich. We're supposed to set our "succubus peril" models to start running today.

(Granted, she might actually like him for not his money. Maybe he checked her facebook history first to make sure she didn't seem greedy.)

well, (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056395)

giveafuck level 9000.

Re:well, (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056725)

Let me know when it's over.

CNN.com reckoning of time (3, Insightful)

michaelmalak (91262) | about 2 years ago | (#40056401)

For a while last night, the front page of cnn.com read, "Days after his company made its stock market debut, Facebook co-founder and chief executive Mark Zuckerberg married his longtime girlfriend Priscilla Chan." The new cycle has shortened so much that even journalists now make the error of thinking several days have elapsed when only 24 hours have.

Re:CNN.com reckoning of time (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056777)

For a while last night, the front page of cnn.com read, "Days after his company made its stock market debut, Facebook co-founder and chief executive Mark Zuckerberg married his longtime girlfriend Priscilla Chan." The new cycle has shortened so much that even journalists now make the error of thinking several days have elapsed when only 24 hours have.

You used the words "journalist" and "think" in the same sentence.

Major mistake.

Dear slashdot, (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056407)

You are now Digg.

Good luck.

this just in... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056411)

....and I updated mine to "Who gives a rat's ass?"

Donald Trump? (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056429)

Best prenup advice is from Eddie Murphy [youtube.com] . (completely NSFW).

This .. (1, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056459)

...post will be the main reason for the slashdotters to quit!

I still say... (0)

whargoul (932206) | about 2 years ago | (#40056467)

...he is one weird looking mother fucker.

Re:I still say... (2)

Ihmhi (1206036) | about 2 years ago | (#40056599)

It's all the weight he lost recently. He used to be healthier looking, but when you sign the contract and Belial, Lord of Lies rips your netherself from the husk that is left on the mortal coil, you drop about 26-27 lbs.

Why ISN'T this idle? (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056469)

This is exactly what Idle was created for! PLEASE USE IT.

This isn't news for nerds at all.
If he DIED, maybe that would be news. (loss of a huge influence in the market)
If he gave birth, maybe that would be news. (scientific monstrosity)
If he married a robot, maybe that would be news. (AWESOME)
This? Big deal.

9 billion $ ? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056477)

so she's now worth 9 million $ ?

5 dolla (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056483)

Sucky fucky 5 dolla

any for anyone who wants to know (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056485)

I took a shit around 4:30am.

Re:any for anyone who wants to know (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056565)

I took a shit around 4:30am.

Was that a late shit or an early shit?

who cares ? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056493)

seriously ? who gives a rat's ass ?

WE CARE A LOT? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056509)

Who the fuck cares? Is /. becoming Yahoo?

The way they met is interesting (0, Flamebait)

paiute (550198) | about 2 years ago | (#40056527)

Zuckerberg knew a guy who was engaged to her but didn't know much about wedding rings, so he asked Zuckerberg to look into which ring to buy. Zuckerberg agreed, then he vanished for a few days. The guy couldn't find his fiancee and Zuckerberg wasn't returning his calls. After a couple weeks, Zuckerberg shows up in the national news married to the guy's fiancee.

What? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056593)

The fuck is this shit?

Slashdot's just trollin' now (1)

humanrev (2606607) | about 2 years ago | (#40056647)

The editors here at Slashdot know a lot of people here don't like Facebook for various reasons. It's one thing to put a post regarding the Facebook IPO, but putting such a non-story like this here suggests Slashdot editors either don't know their audience... or that they DO know their audience and expect a flamewar, increasing comment count and hence views and so on.

This is what other shitty websites do to keep getting attention. Surely Slashdot doesn't have to troll as well.

Oh and to paraphrase Sideshow Bob, I'm aware of the irony of posting on Slashdot in order to decry it. So don't bother pointing that out.

Marrying Ages of Tech's Rich and Famous (3, Informative)

theodp (442580) | about 2 years ago | (#40056681)

1. Bill Gates [about.com] , age 39. 2. Larry Page [go.com] , age 34. 3. Sergey Brin [washingtonpost.com] , age 33. 4. Steve Jobs [about.com] , 36. 5. Larry Ellison [wikipedia.org] , 23, 33, 39, 59 (currently divorced).

Re:Marrying Ages of Tech's Rich and Famous (4, Funny)

Nemyst (1383049) | about 2 years ago | (#40057003)

All this shows is that Ellison is an ass even in his personal life.

amusing comment of scale (0)

argStyopa (232550) | about 2 years ago | (#40056755)

Of course, given the lackluster IPO results and the nature of relationships, secretly she probably read about his $19 billion and thought: disappointing....

Be funny if she dumped him because of it. Heh.

More importantly (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 2 years ago | (#40056827)

Who gives a fuck?

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