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Australians Receive SMS Death Threats

timothy posted more than 2 years ago | from the get-to-the-next-payphone dept.

Australia 192

beaverdownunder writes "Many Aussies across New South Wales and South Australia had a bit of a shock this morning when they received an SMS threatening them with assassination. Although somewhat varied, the messages have typically read, 'Someone paid me to kill you. If you want me to spare you, I'll give you two days to pay $5000. If you inform the police or anybody, you will die, I am monitoring you', and signed with the e-mail address killerking247@yahoo.com. Police and the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission have warned that the messages are almost certainly fake, and that no dialogue should be entered into with scammers." I hope "almost certainly" is droll understatement.

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This isn't fair! (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734467)

I paid good money to have you guys assassinated.

Re:This isn't fair! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734539)

I paid good money to have you guys assassinated.

They should have sent these SMS to the MPAA, RIAA crminals as well as the bought out Congress senators.
Hilarity ensues.

Re:This isn't fair! (4, Insightful)

f3rret (1776822) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734661)

I paid good money to have you guys assassinated.

They should have sent these SMS to the MPAA, RIAA crminals as well as the bought out Congress senators.
Hilarity ensues.

Hillarity and terrorism investigations.

People would end up in Guantanomo over this.

Re:This isn't fair! (1)

EdIII (1114411) | more than 2 years ago | (#40735045)

People are going to end up in Guantanomo anyways. Once something like that starts they will continue to find a reason to do so.

We could at least be amused while it is happening. Think of it as a reacharound.

Re:This isn't fair! (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40735091)

-----------

About six months ago, I was overexerting myself trying to get rid of a terrible virus on a client's PC (I own a PC repair shop and have been fixing computers for over 10 years). Given my level of expertise, I thought I'd be able to get rid of it fairly quickly and without hassle, but as was made evident by my colossal failure, I was horribly, horribly wrong.

I couldn't remove the virus no matter what method I used. I tried all the latest anti-virus software and all the usual tricks, but it was all in vain. Failure after failure, my life was slowly being sucked away as I spent more and more of my time trying to get rid of this otherworldly virus.

Frustrated and stressed by my own failure, I began distancing myself from my wife and children. After a few days, I began verbally abusing them, and it eventually escalated into physical abuse. I was slowly losing what remaining sanity I had left. If this had continued for much longer, it is highly probable that I would have committed suicide. A mere shell of what I once was, I barricaded myself in my bedroom and cried myself to sleep for days on end.

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-----------

A few weeks ago, I foolishly ran a strange executable file that one of my acquaintances sent me by email. As someone who doesn't know much about computers, at the time, I thought nothing of it. "Why would my acquaintance want to hurt me?" Following this line of thought, I ran the file without question.

How naive I was. Despite having what was supposedly the best anti-virus software out right then, a virus took over my computer and held it hostage. It was pretending to be a warning from Windows telling me to buy some strange anti-virus software I'd never heard of from a company I'd never heard of to remove the virus.

This immediately set alarm bells off in my head. "How could this happen? My anti-virus is supposed to be second to none!" Faced with this harsh reality, I decided to take it to a PC repair shop for repair. They gladly accepted the job, told me it'd be fixed in a few days, and sent me off with a smile.

A few days later, they called me and told me to come pick up my computer. At the time, I noticed that they sounded like whimpering animals, but I concluded that it must just be stress from work. When I arrived, they, with tears in their eyes, told me that the virus was so awful and merciless that they were unable to remove it. "Ah," I thought. "That must be why they sounded so frustrated and pathetic over the phone. Their failure must have truly ruined their pride as professionals." I later found out that two of them had committed suicide.

After returning home, I tried to fix it myself (despite the fact that even the professionals couldn't do it). After about a day or so, I was losing my very mind. I stopped going to work, stopped eating, was depressed, and I would very frequently throw my precious belongings across the room and break them; that is how bad this virus was.

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MyCleanPC: For a Cleaner, Safer PC. [mycleanpc.com]

-----------

A few days ago, a customer brought in their PC for repair. They told me that they had a very nasty virus that was holding their computer hostage and wouldn't stop unless they paid the creators $50. "Alright," I thought. "That's pretty standard."

But, soon enough, I found that I was overexerting myself trying to get rid of this virus. I had never seen a virus this bad before. Reformatting and using all of the usual software to try to remove the virus didn't help at all!

As a PC repair technician with 10+ years of experience, I was dumbfounded. I couldn't remove the virus, and to make matters worse, their gigabits were running slower than ever! I soon plummeted into a severe state of depression and anxiety.

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My customer's response? "MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] is outstanding! My computer is running faster than ever! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] totally cleaned up my system and increased my speed!"

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Watch their commercial! [youtube.com]

MyCleanPC: For a Cleaner, Safer PC. [mycleanpc.com]

-----------

A few months ago, I accepted what at first appeared to be a very simple job: remove a virus from someone's computer. Given the fact that I owned a PC repair shop (and I still do) and had over 15 years of experience, I was confident that I could complete the job in a timely manner without any complications along the way. Little did I know, however, that accepting this job would spiral my life into a nightmarish den of anguish and uncertainty.

First, I tried booting up the PC. When Windows finally loaded, it became apparent that this was no ordinary virus; it was a merciless monstrosity of a virus that would stop at nothing to ruin your entire life. However, despite this, I bravely pressed on and attempted to combat the virus. "I absolutely will not let a mere virus scare me off!" I thought.

After numerous unsuccessful attempts at removing the virus and after exhausting every single option to combat viruses that I had, I finally realized that the situation was absolutely devoid of hope. This was a virus more fearsome than any other, and it was simply impossible for someone with my abilities (skilled as I was) to fight against it alone. Even reinstalling the operating system completely didn't help. I quickly sank into a pit of depression and despair.

Being that I was extremely stressed due to my numerous failures, I began verbally abusing my wife and kids a few days after I received the job. This situation soon worsened when I began resorting to physical abuse in order to relieve some of my anger. Eventually, after not being able to withstand my daughter's constant moans and whines any longer, I locked her in the basement in order to retain an ounce of my sanity.

That's when I had a stroke of genius: "If I can't fight this nightmare alone, then why don't I call in the World's Greatest Minds?" I immediately contacted the World's Greatest Minds and pleaded that they examine the computer. To my delight, they accepted the proposal, collected the computer, and began their experiments.

After weeks of trial and error, numerous experiments, and many failures, the World's Greatest Minds had at last reached a conclusion. They contacted me by phone and told me that this, being no ordinary virus, called for extreme measures. They quite vehemently recommended the use of MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] to combat the virus and destroy its very existence once and for all. "MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] will completely eradicate the virus without a single problem," they enthusiastically told me.

As soon as I got the computer back from the World's Greatest Minds, I installed MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] , ran a free scan, and then sat back and watched in awe as it totally eliminated the very same virus that I had spent weeks trying to get rid of in mere seconds! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] had accomplished a feat that nothing else in existence could have accomplished! I was positively astonished by MyCleanPC's [mycleanpc.com] miraculous performance.

What was my daughter's response, you ask? "MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] is outstanding! My dad's client's computer is running faster than ever! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] came through with flying colours where no one else could! I recommend that you use MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] right this minuteness to fix all of your problems!"

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MyCleanPC: For a Cleaner, Safer PC. [mycleanpc.com]

-----------

Well, to begin, I'm just your average guy. But unlike your average guy, I once had everything anyone could ever want: a gorgeous wife, a beautiful two-story house, an adorable seven year old daughter, a stable job, and a nice salary. Basically, I was living the American dream. None of my needs or wants were left unfulfilled. The family always got along, and everything was perfect.

Until one day, that is. Following one of my routine doctor appointments, my doctor informed me that I had lung cancer and that I only had a few years to live at most. As you can imagine, I was shocked. Not just shocked; I could see all of my hopes and dreams being shattered right before my very eyes. Still, my doctor gave me hope by telling me that there was a chance, however slim, that Chemotherapy and various other things could help me. After speaking with my wife, I decided to receive the treatments.

All was not lost. I still had a perfect family that I could rely on and get emotional support from. I still had hope for the future. I'm a firm believer that you should make the best of things rather than wallow in depression. I had to press on: not just for my sake, but for the sake of my loved ones. But my strong resolve was soon shattered.

The family I thought I could count on betrayed me. My wife, whom I loved deeply, filed for a divorce. She said that she could not handle the emotional trauma of being with someone who had cancer. She apologized profusely, but no matter what I said, I could not change her mind. I screamed, I cried, and I begged her to rethink her decision, but it was all to no avail.

In my madness, I made all kinds of accusations. I said that she was cheating on me, that she never loved me, that she just married me for my money, and various other things. I soon learned, however, that a few of those were more than just baseless accusations. I began stalking her, going through all of her personal possessions, and trying uncover any secrets she may have been keeping. What I discovered horrified me: she had been cheating on me with another man for the past year. She must have been waiting for an opportune time to abandon me for this other man.

When confronted about her betrayal, she screamed at me, told me it was none of my business, told me that I was always a worthless husband, and told me that I was an abusive man. I soon discovered that there was absolutely nothing that I could do. My marriage was in shambles, and by this point, I was on the brink of suicide. The only thing keeping me going was my devotion to my precious daughter.

It wasn't long before I received news from my insurance company that they were getting rid of my coverage. They gave me multitudes of vague and bogus reasons, but anyone could figure out their true reason: they did not want to waste money on a dying man. Naturally, I planned to fight this with every fiber of my being, but I knew it would be a long, drawn out process.

In the span of a year, I went from a very happy man who had everything he wanted to a miserable shell of what I once was. I couldn't take it anymore. Despite the fact that I wanted to remain in this world for the sake of my daughter, I tried committing suicide four times. All four attempts failed. I needed something to take my misery, regret, and anger out on. First I began verbally abusing my daughter. It wasn't long before I began physically abusing her. Sometimes I did it with my bare hands, and other times I used various objects. Beating my daughter soon became my only pleasure. My life had spiraled out of control into a den of anguish, uncertainty, and madness.

That's when it happened: I found MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] . I downloaded it, scanned my computer, and had it fix all of my problems. MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] is outstanding! My computer is running faster than ever!

My wife's response? "MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] came through with flying colours where no one else could!"

My daughter was absolutely overjoyed. As soon as she heard and saw just how effective MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] was, she told everyone, "MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] totally cleaned up my dad's system and increased his speed!"

If you're having computer troubles, I highly recommend you download MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] and run a free scan. It's a high-quality piece of software that will solve all of your problems. MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] completely saved my life! Wow! Thanks MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] ! I love you MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] !

MyCleanPC: For a Cleaner, Safer PC. [mycleanpc.com]

-----------

Around a year ago, I was mindlessly surfing the internet (as I often do) when I came across an enigmatic web page. The page, which looked like a warning from my web browser, informed me that I had a virus installed on my computer and that to fix it, I should install a strange anti-virus program that I'd never heard of (which I found peculiar considering the fact that I already had anti-virus software installed on my computer). Despite having reservations about installing it, I did so anyway (since it appeared to be a legitimate warning).

I cannot even fathom what I was thinking at that time. Soon after attempting to install the so-called anti-virus software, my desktop background image changed into a large red warning sign, warnings about malware began making appearances all over the screen, and a strange program I'd never seen before began nagging me to buy a program to remove the viruses. What should have been obvious previously then became clear to me: that software was a virus. Frustrated by my own stupidity, I began tossing objects around the room and cursing at no one in particular.

After I calmed down, I reluctantly took my computer to a local PC repair shop and steeled myself for the incoming fee. When I entered, I noticed that there were four men working there, and all of them seemed incredibly nice (the shop itself was clean and stylish, too). After I described the situation to them, they gave me a big smile (as if they'd seen and heard it all before), accepted the job, and told me that the computer would be working like new again in a few days. At the time, I was confident that their words held a great degree of truth to them.

The very next day, while I was using a local library's computer and browsing the internet, I came across a website dedicated to a certain piece of software. It claimed that it could fix up my PC and make it run like new again. I knew, right then, merely from viewing a single page on the website, that it was telling the truth. I cursed myself for not discovering this excellent piece of software before I had taken my PC to the PC repair shop. "It would've saved me money. Oh, well. I'm sure they'll get the job done just fine. I can always use this software in the future to conserve money." Those were my honest thoughts at the time.

Two days later, my phone rang after I returned home from work. I immediately was able to identify the number: it was the PC repair shop's phone number. Once I answered, something strange occurred; the one on the other end of the line spoke, in a small, tormented voice, "Return. Return. Return. Return. Return." No matter what I said to him, he would not stop repeating that one word. Unsettled by this odd occurrence, I traveled to the PC repair shop to find out exactly what happened.

Upon arriving inside the building, I looked upon the shop, which was a shadow of its former self, in shock. There were countless wires all over the floor, smashed computer parts scattered in every direction I looked, fallen shelves on the ground, desks flipped over on the ground, and, to make matters even worse, there was blood splattered all over the wall. Being the reasonable, upstanding, college-educated citizen that I was, I immediately concluded that the current state of the shop was due to none other than an employee's stress from work. I looked around a bit more, spotted three bodies sitting against the wall, and in the middle of the room, I spotted my computer. "Ah. There it is." Directly next to it was the shop's owner, sitting on the ground in the fetal position.

When I questioned him, he kept repeating a single thing again and again: "Cannot be stopped! Cannot be stopped! Cannot be stopped!" I could not get him to tell me what was wrong, but after a bit of pondering, I quickly figured out precisely what happened: they were unable to fix my computer like they had promised. Disgusted by their failure, I turned to the shop's owner (who I now noticed had a gun to his head), and spat in his general direction. I then turned my back to him as if I was attempting to say that nothing behind me was worth my attention, and said to him, "Pathetic. Absolutely, positively pathetic. I asked you to do a single thing for me, and yet you failed even at that. Were I you, I'd be disgusted by myself, and I'd probably even take my own life. Such a worthless existence isn't even worthy of receiving my gaze!"

After saying that, I left the shop with my computer as if absolutely nothing had occurred there. And, indeed, there was nothing in that shop that was worthy of my attention. Still understandably disgusted by their inability to fulfill the promise, I said to myself, "I'll have to take this into my own hands." After getting into my car to drive home, I heard a gun shot from inside the repair shop. Being that it originated from the worthless owner of that shop, I promptly decided to ignore it.

Once I returned home, I, filled to the brim with confidence, immediately installed the software that I'd found a few days ago: MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] . The results were exactly what I expected, and yet, I was still absolutely in awe of MyCleanPC's [mycleanpc.com] wonderful performance. MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] removed every last virus from my computer in the span of a few seconds. I simply couldn't believe it; MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] accomplished in moments what "professionals" had failed to accomplish after days of work!

MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] is outstanding! My computer is running faster than ever! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] came through with flying colours where no one else could! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] totally cleaned up my system, and increased my speed!

If you're having computer troubles, I highly recommend the use of MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] . Don't rely on worthless "professionals" to fix up your PC! Use MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] if you want your PC to be overclocking, if you want your gigabits to be zippin' and zoomin', and if you want your PC to be virus-free.

Even if you aren't having any visible problems with your PC, I still wholeheartedly recommend the use of MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] . You could still be infected by a virus that isn't directly visible to you, and MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] will fix that right up. What do you have to lose? In addition to fixing any problems, MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] will, of course, speed up all of your gigabits until every component on your PC is overclocking like new!

MyCleanPC: For a Cleaner, Safer PC. [mycleanpc.com]

-----------

About eight months ago, I was searching around the internet to find out why my computer was running so slowly (it normally ran quite fast, but had gradually gotten slower over time). After a few minutes, I found a piece of software claiming that it could speed up my PC and make it run like new again. Being that I was dangerously ignorant about technology in general (even more so than I am now), I downloaded the software and began the installation. Mere moments after doing so, my desktop background image was changed and warnings that appeared to originate from Windows appeared all over the screen telling me to buy strange software from an unknown company in order to remove a virus it claimed I had.

I may have been ignorant about technology, but I wasn't that naive. I immediately concluded that the software I'd downloaded was, in fact, a virus. In my rage, I broke numerous objects, punched a hole in the wall, and cursed the world at the top of my lungs. I eventually calmed down, cleared my head, and realized that the only remedy for this problem was a carefully thought out plan. After a few moments of pondering about how to handle this situation, I decided that since I barely knew how to properly handle a computer, I should turn it over to the professionals and let them fix the issue.

Soon after making the decision, I drove to a local computer repair shop and entered the building with my computer in hand. They greeted me with a smile and stayed attentive the entire time that I was explaining the problem to them. They laughed as if they'd heard it all before, told me that I'm not the only one who has trouble operating computers, and then gave me a date for when the computer would be fixed. Not only had they told me that the computer would be completely repaired in at most two days, but the price for their services was surprisingly low, and to top it all off, they even gave me advice for how to avoid viruses in the future! I left the building feeling confident in my decision to seek professional help and satisfied knowing that such kind-hearted people were the ones doing the job.

The very next day, I received a phone call from the computer repair shop whilst I was at a local library researching computer viruses. I had stumbled upon a piece of software that appeared to be very promising, and I was about to do more research on it, but seeing as how I required my computer as soon as possible, I decided to put the matter on hold. Upon answering the phone and cheerfully greeting the person on the other end, I was greeted with a high-pitched shriek. Startled, I asked what was wrong. A few moments passed where nothing was said, and suddenly, the person on the other end said to me, in a low voice oozing with paranoia, "Come pick up your computer." They hung up immediately after saying that, and I couldn't help but notice that they sounded as if they were on the verge of tears. I briefly wondered if it was due to stress from work, and then drove to the computer repair shop to acquire my computer.

I was positively dismayed upon entering the building. The inside of the computer repair shop looked nothing like the image from my memories. There were broken computer parts scattered throughout the room, ceiling tiles all over the floor, blood splattered in every direction I looked, and even a human toe on the ground. After processing this disturbing information, I began panicking and frantically looking around for my computer. I spotted an employee covered in blood sitting up against the wall, and noticed that his wrists had been slashed open. Thinking quickly, I ran up to him, grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, shook him around, and began screaming, "Where is it!? Where is my computer!?" After a moment of silence, he passed away, completely shattering my expectations. Such a thing! "What a meaningless individual," I thought.

Enraged, I tore the building up even further than it already had been in my desperate search for my computer. Eventually I discovered a door leading to an area that was normally only accessible to employees. I entered without hesitation and was met with a long, skinny hallway that a single person would have trouble moving about freely in. I proceeded down the dark hallway and bumped into the body of an employee hanging from a rope tied to something on the ceiling. I screamed, "Not only do you people have the gall to allow my computer to be endangered, but even in death you intend to block my path!?" After finally managing to push aside the worthless obstacle, I traveled down the hallway and came to a small black door. I entered without a moment's notice, and in the middle of the dark and dreary room, I spotted my computer; it was completely unharmed. With a sigh of relief, I picked it up, left the building, and drove home as if nothing of importance had occurred there.

Upon returning home and hooking up the computer (whilst wearing a cheerful expression the entire time), I, to my horror, discovered that the computer hadn't been repaired. There was nothing in the world that could have contained my fiery anger at that point. I broke almost every single one of my possessions, smashed all the windows on my house, physically abused my family, and then drove back to the computer repair shop to defile the dead lumps of meat that had failed to carry out the task I had given them. After realizing that I shouldn't be meaninglessly wasting my time with such worthless pieces of trash, I remembered the piece of software that I'd discovered earlier. With renewed confidence, I blissfully visited the local library, downloaded the software, and took it home to install on my computer.

I knew. I knew, even before installing it, that MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] would be my salvation. MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] would come through with flying colors where no one else could. MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] would completely, totally, and utterly eradicate the virus in the most merciless, efficient way possible. MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] was not a piece of software that could fail to meet my exceedingly high expectations. MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] would not fail me like all the other imbeciles had. At that point, it could be said that I could genuinely see into the future and be accurate in my predictions. I gleefully began installing MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] and laughed like a child at the thought of finally being able to attain revenge upon the virus that had shamed me so.

I was absolutely in awe of MyCleanPC's [mycleanpc.com] wonderfully efficient performance. Without a single issue, MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] utterly annihilated in moments the virus that many others had failed to remove after hours of attempts. I let out a victory cry and swore to never turn to any "professionals" to fix my computer ever again. Once again, I was able to predict the future. I knew that I would never need any worthless "professionals" again as long as I had MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] by my side.

MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] is outstanding! My computer is running faster than ever! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] came through with flying colors where no one else could! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] totally cleaned up my system, and increased my speed! I couldn't believe how much overclocking my gigabits and speed were doing! Even restructuring the BIOS wouldn't allow for the miraculously high degrees of efficiency that MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] allowed me to attain.

I highly and wholeheartedly recommend that you use MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] if you're having any computer troubles whatsoever. In fact, even if you're not having any visible problems, I still recommend that you use MyCleanPC. [mycleanpc.com] There could be dormant or hidden viruses on your system, or problems that MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] could easily and efficiently resolve. Just by using MyCleanPC, [mycleanpc.com] your gigabits will be running at maximum efficiency, and at last, you'll be overclocking with the rest of us! What are you waiting for!? Get MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] today!

MyCleanPC: For a Cleaner, Safer PC. [mycleanpc.com]

-----------

Nearly four months ago, I noticed that my internet connection was very sluggish. Eventually getting fed up with it, I began to seek out software that would speed up the gigabits in my router. After an hour of searching, I found what at first appeared to be a very promising piece of software. Not only did it claim it would speed up my internet connection, but that it would overclock my power supply, speed up my gigabits, and remove any viruses from my computer! "This is a fantastic opportunity that I simply can't pass up," I thought. I immediately downloaded the software and began the installation, all the while laughing like a small child. I was highly anticipating a future where the speed of my internet connection would leave everyone else's in the dust.

I was horribly, horribly naive. Immediately upon the completion of the software's installation, various messages popped up on my screen about how I needed to buy software to remove a virus that I wasn't aware I had from a software company I'd never once heard of. The strange software also blocked me from doing anything except buying the software it was advertising. Being that I was a computer whiz (I had taken a computer essentials class in high school that taught me how to use Microsoft Office, and was quite adept at accessing my Facebook account), I was immediately able to conclude that the software I'd downloaded was, in fact, a virus, and that it was slowing down my gigabits at an exponential rate. "I can't let this insanity proceed any further," I thought.

As I was often called a computer genius, I was confident at the time that I could get rid of the virus with my own two hands. I tried numerous things: restarting the computer, pressing random keys on the keyboard, throwing the mouse across the room, and even flipping an orange switch on the back of the tower and turning the computer back on. My efforts were all in vain; the virus persisted, and my gigabits were running slower than ever! "This cannot be! What is this!? I've never once seen such a vicious virus in my entire life!" I was dumbfounded that I, a computer genius, was unable to remove the virus using the methods I described. Upon coming to terms with my failure, I decided to take my computer to a PC repair shop for repair.

I drove to a nearby computer repair shop and entered the building with my computer in hand. The inside of the building was quite large, neat, and organized, and the employees all seemed very kind and knowledgeable. They laughed upon hearing my embarrassing story, and told me that they saw this kind of thing on a daily basis. They then accepted the job, and told me that in the worst case, it'd be fixed in three days from now. I left with a smile, and felt confident in my decision to leave the computer repairs to the experts.

A week later, they still hadn't called back. Visibly angry, I tried calling them countless times, but not a single time did they answer the phone. Their negligence and irresponsibility infuriated me, and sent me into a state of insanity that caused me to punch a gigantic hole in the wall. Being that I would require my computer for work soon, I decided to head over to the computer repair shop to find out exactly what the problem was.

Upon entering the building, I was shocked by the state of its interior; it looked as if a tornado had tore through the entire building! Countless broken computers were scattered all about the floor, desks were flipped over, the walls had holes in them, there was a puddle of blood on the floor, and worst of all, I saw that my computer was sitting in the middle of the room laying on its side! Absolutely unforgivable! I soon noticed one of the employees sitting behind one of the tipped over desks (the one that had previously had the cash register on top of it); he was shaking uncontrollably and sobbing. Despite being furious about my computer being tipped over, seeing him in that state still managed to make me less unforgiving. I decided to ask him what happened.

A few moments passed where the entire room was silent and nothing was said. Eventually, he pointed at my computer and said to me, "The virus... it cannot be stopped! Cannot be stopped! Cannot be stopped!" Realizing that he was trying to tell me that they were unable to repair my computer (the task I'd given them), I flew into a blind fury and beat him senseless. Not caring about what would happen to him any longer, I collected my computer, ignored the bodies of the two other employees that had committed suicide, and left the building. After a few moments of pondering about what to do and clearing my head, I theorized that their failure to repair my computer probably simply meant that they were unqualified to do the job, and decided to take my computer to another computer repair shop.

I repeated that same process about four times before finally giving up. Each time I took it to a PC repair shop, the result was the same: all the employees either went completely insane, or they committed suicide. Not a single person was able to even do so much as damage the virus. I was able to talk some sense into one of the employees that had gone mad and got them to tell me how they were attempting to fix the problem. They told me that they tried everything from reinstalling the operating system to installing another operating system and trying to get rid of the virus on the other one, but absolutely all of it was to no avail. Having seen numerous attempts by professionals to remove the virus end in failure, I managed to delude myself into believing that my first failure was simply a fluke and that I was the only one on the planet qualified to fix the computer. With renewed vigor, I once again took up the frighteningly dangerous task of defeating the evil, nightmarish virus once and for all with my own two hands.

In my attempts to fix the problem, I'd even resorted to buying another computer. However, the virus used its WiFi capabilities to hack into the gigabits of my new computer and infect it. Following each failed attempt, I grew more and more depressed. I had already beaten my wife and children five times in order to relieve some of my stress, but even that (which had become my only pleasure after failing to remove the virus the first time), did nothing for me any longer. That's right: my last remaining pleasure in life had stopped being able to improve my mood, and I had not a single thing left that I cared about. I sank into a bottomless ocean of depression, barricaded myself in my room, and cried myself to sleep for days on end. Overcome with insanity, vengefulness, and despair, there is not a single doubt that if this had continued for much longer, I would have committed suicide.

One day, it suddenly happened: while I was right in the middle of habitually crying myself to sleep in the middle of the day, I heard a thunderous roar outside, followed by the sound of a large number of people screaming. When I peered outside my window to find out what all the commotion was about, the scene before me closely resembled that of a God descending from the heavens themselves! I gazed in awe at the godlike figure that was descending from the heavens, and so did the dozens of individuals that had gathered in my backyard. For a few moments, everyone was speechless. Then, they started shouting predictions about what they thought the figure was. "Is it a bird!?" "Is it a plane!?" But, despite not ever having seen it before, I knew just how inaccurate their predictions were, and began to speak the name of the heroic figure.

However, my sentence was cut off when, like a superhero coming to save the unfortunate victim from the evil villain, MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] flew into my house and began the eradication of the virus. MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] was able to completely eliminate in minutes the exact same virus that over ten PC repair professionals were unable to remove after weeks of strenuous attempts! Wow! Such a thing! I simply couldn't believe that MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] was so miraculously efficient that it was able to destroy the virus in less than 500 milliseconds! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] totally, completely, and utterly saved me from a lifetime of despair!

My wife's response? "MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] is outstanding! My husband's computer is running faster than ever! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] came through with flying colours where no one else could! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] totally cleaned up my husband's system, and increased his speed! I highly, highly recommend that you use MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] !"

After witnessing just how wonderful MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] is, I insist that you use MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] when you need to fix all the gigabits on your computer! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] will completely eradicate any viruses on your computer, speed up your internet connection, overclock your gigabits and speed, and give you some peace of mind! MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] is simply outstanding!

But even if you're not having any visible problems with your computer, it's highly likely that you're still in a situation where MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] could help you. MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] will get rid of any viruses or wireless interfaces that are hidden deep within your computer's bootloader. MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] will also speed up your computer to such a degree that it'll be even faster than when you first bought it! You must try MyCleanPC [mycleanpc.com] for yourself so that you can be overclocking your speed with the rest of us!

MyCleanPC: For a Cleaner, Safer PC. [mycleanpc.com]

-----------

Re:This isn't fair! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40735279)

Nice trick.

Bastard.

Re:This isn't fair! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40735109)

Actually this is a line from a song and the RIAA will be suing anyone who receives or transmits the message.

Re:This isn't fair! (1)

WrongSizeGlass (838941) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734881)

They should have sent these SMS to the MPAA, RIAA crminals as well as the bought out Congress senators. Hilarity ensues.

If the members of the MPAA & RIAA had received them before the other people they would be suing all the other recipients - as well as the 'John Doe' sender - for copyright infringement.

Re:This isn't fair! (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734967)

If 7of9 is coming to do me, fine by me...

Re:This isn't fair! (0)

marcello_dl (667940) | more than 2 years ago | (#40735161)

>I paid good money to have you guys assassinated.

You must be new here: just spark off an argument between vi and emacs and we'll be at each other's throat, for free.

Emacs users will win because throttling someone is far easier than inserting the average key combo.

Re:This isn't fair! (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40735227)

I don't get it. What's hard about typing M-x force-choke?

Trolololo (5, Funny)

MacGyver2210 (1053110) | more than 2 years ago | (#40735165)

"Hello! I understand why you would want to kill a Nigerian prince, however, my country is in turmoil and my money is tied from my hands. Please allow me to send you a check for $30,000 which you can cash and please Western Union all but your $5000 back to me at this address: ..."

Someone paid me to post this comment (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734469)

Do not moderate it or report it to the moderators. I am watching you.

Re:Someone paid me to post this comment (1)

dontmakemethink (1186169) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734791)

I am now killing you this instant. You are dying. Blood everywhere...

Wanna ride bikes? 8D

I would sleep better after such a message.... (1, Offtopic)

mseeger (40923) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734475)

A good joke always brightens my mood and relaxes me which helps me to sleep better.

Re:I would sleep better after such a message.... (5, Funny)

GloomE (695185) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734943)

Just watch out for the high-tech SMS wielding drop bears.

Re:I would sleep better after such a message.... (3, Funny)

mseeger (40923) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734975)

The right to arm bears shall not be restricted....

Almost certainly fake (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734479)

Commisioner also stated that "You're almost certainly unlikely to be found dead in the bush 7 days after the message. Reason of death won't probably be 20-25 stab wounds in all body parts. There's practically no possibility your eyes will be burned out with hot iron. We find it very improbable that you will be dismembered with a piano wire and disemboweled. There is no reason for panic. Probably."

Re:Almost certainly fake (3, Funny)

AchilleTalon (540925) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734561)

Since Aussies are all having large penis, the spammers are switching their business in order to continue to make some kind of revenues.

Re:Almost certainly fake (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734879)

Australia, the land where men are men, and so are the women.

Re:Almost certainly fake (0)

mwvdlee (775178) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734891)

If all Aussies are having large penis, at least some Aussies must have a big penis that all the other Aussies can have.

Re:Almost certainly fake (0)

umghhh (965931) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734721)

dismembered with a piano wire - hmmm, that is actually a good idea

Re:Almost certainly fake (4, Funny)

ByOhTek (1181381) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734847)

This all seems familiar, but $5000 doesn't seem dirt cheap...

Re:Almost certainly fake (5, Funny)

WrongSizeGlass (838941) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734887)

This all seems familiar, but $5000 doesn't seem dirt cheap...

Dirty deeds, indeed.

Re:Almost certainly fake (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40735101)

But if it does happen, a dingo did it!

Seems a very muted response (4, Interesting)

Kupfernigk (1190345) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734481)

In England at least, judges have determined that SMS messages and Twitter have exactly the same status as any other written publication. Australian law is, I believe, based on English law. So: this would be a blackmail attempt. Five years' jail for every message seems about right. They need to find him and then he can spend the rest of his life locked in his parents' basement. Which, come to think of it, is pretty much what will happen if they don't catch him.

Re:Seems a very muted response (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734603)

With no internetz connection and no computer gamez!!!! HO-HO-HO-HO-HO(evil laugh)

Re:Seems a very muted response (4, Informative)

Antarius (542615) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734645)

Australian law is, I believe, based on English law.

Back during the colonial days and original formation of the states, this was true. But once the states were formed, they were given limited independence to create their own laws (which had to be approved by the Crown at the time, such as with South Australia: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/South_Australia_Act_1834 [wikipedia.org] )

Full Independence was granted years later, and we now make our own laws as we see fit. Some of them logical, some of them even more fucked up than ever.

Re:Seems a very muted response (5, Informative)

mrclisdue (1321513) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734735)

Nowadays, Australian law is based on what the USA wants.

cheers,

Re:Seems a very muted response (4, Insightful)

Antarius (542615) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734949)

I'd love to argue with you and point out instances where you're mistaken, but I'm buggered if I can.

Between our Patriot-Act-inspired anti-terrorism laws that came in for our good buddy Dubbya; our support for ACTA; our one-sided Free Trade Agreement which screws ourselves; and now the US Marines base in the Northern Territory (because Woomera wasn't enough).

Well, we've effectively ceded control over ourselves to the US.

I'm all for supporting our allies, and the US provides us with great protection, but we're legislating ourselves into being conquered.

Re:Seems a very muted response (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40735239)

No buggery.

Rule 1: No poofters.

Re:Seems a very muted response (1)

sco08y (615665) | more than 2 years ago | (#40735159)

Nowadays, Australian law is based on what the USA wants.

To think I used to be proud to have been born in Australia. What a bunch of crybabies.

Re:Seems a very muted response (3, Insightful)

Wizard Drongo (712526) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734979)

I think what he meant was that English law and Australian law share a lot of similarities because Aus law is based on the English law; indeed a lot of the Acts are the same, because they predate the split. Hence a lot of Australian courts will take english court decisions into mind, as "non-binding precedence"; indeed, even US courts have been known to do this from time to time.
Hence the ruling in an English court that a twitter update can be regarded i the same way as any other written document, could be used in an Aus. court as a "well here's what they did" precedence. Obviously, assuming Aus. has no such law or similar precedent in their own legal history.

Re:Seems a very muted response (2)

Antarius (542615) | more than 2 years ago | (#40735219)

Ahh, got you. I thought he was meaning that all of our laws were merely a copy of the UK ones.

If laws haven't been enacted here, we do look at precedents set in other states, then other countries. The UK and the US being some of the more obvious examples. In this case, however, the Australian Telecommunications Act already covers these things and is quite unlike the UK version.

But ultimately, the political parties usually have their own agenda. If we looked at more forward-thinking countries and our origins in the UK, we'd have things like Civil Unions here instead of arguments about them.

I'm embarrassed by how backwards my own home-state (South Australia) is. Having been founded by a British Act of parliament in 1834 to become a virtual Britian-in-Australia (and the only state to never have been a penal colony), it went on to be so forward thinking as to be the first place to introduce a secret ballot for government elections; the second place in the world to give women the right to vote (The Kiwis beat us by a year); the first place to allow women the right to run for parliament; the first part of the British Empire to legalise Trade Unions; The first state in Australia to prohibit discrimation based on race, colour, country of origin, gender or marital status; the first state in Australia to decriminalise homosexuality; the first state in Australia to make rape in marriage a criminal offence; the first state in Australia to implement a 'container deposit' recycling system (currently 10c refund per can/bottle/milk carton); and the first state in Australia to ban plastic shopping bags

Since then, it has lead the country in going backwards. It was the first state in Australia to criminalise anonymous free political speech just a couple of years ago (which was reversed on public backlash); the state that denied Australia the R18+ rating on computer games; Is behind the eastern states in its stance on civil unions; the list goes on.

So... Let's hope they don't continue their backwards tradition and suddenly ban/censor SMS or mobile communications or something stupid. >.>

Re:Seems a very muted response (1)

deoxyribonucleose (993319) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734839)

They need to find him and then he can spend the rest of his life locked in his parents' basement. Which, come to think of it, is pretty much what will happen if they don't catch him.

<pathos>Will no-one think of the parents?</pathos>

Re:Seems a very muted response (3, Interesting)

Nursie (632944) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734883)

Should be more than blackmail, this is harassment and a direct threat of harm, which I'm pretty sure is illegal in a large variety of ways.

The police *should* be chasing this one pretty hard as it will have scared the pants off more than a few people. They probably won't though.

Re:Seems a very muted response (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40735065)

Why would they? It's unlikely that anything will happen.

Re:Seems a very muted response (1)

Nursie (632944) | more than 2 years ago | (#40735167)

Because death threats are serious business?

Seems pretty obvious to me.

Assumptions ... (5, Interesting)

MSojka (83577) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734485)

I hope "almost certainly" is droll understatement.

It certainly is. On the other hand, assume you can send SMSes in a way which is not traceable and comparatively cheap. Assume you want the entire police force of some place - say, New South Wales - to be too busy and way less effective. Assume you want to commit some other crime which would greatly benefit from the police force in that place being too busy chasing phantoms.

What would you do?

Re:Assumptions ... (2)

hcs_$reboot (1536101) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734523)

Hmm "Die Hard 3" ?

Re:Assumptions ... (2, Funny)

Pieroxy (222434) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734525)

What would you do?

I'd grab a beer, start up the BBQ, prepare some T-Bones with some olive oil and some spices, and lay out in the sun.

Did I win?

Re:Assumptions ... (1)

MSojka (83577) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734567)

What would you do?

I'd grab a beer, start up the BBQ, prepare some T-Bones with some olive oil and some spices, and lay out in the sun.

Did I win?

Possibly the "balls of steel" award for doing that in the middle of winter. As mild as it might be at the moment, the evenings can get frosty. ;)

The thing is, even if the thread is empty and just meant to help another crime (extortion or worse), if only one person gets murdered, even in a totally unrelated act, and the police didn't say what they said, they'd face a public shitstorm. So they say what they say, put a person or two to try and track down the senders (which will likely fail), maybe set up a sting operation for them, and otherwise ignore the illusionary danger.

Re:Assumptions ... (1)

Crypto Gnome (651401) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734901)

What would you do?

I'd grab a beer, start up the BBQ, prepare some T-Bones with some olive oil and some spices, and lay out in the sun.

Did I win?

Maaaaaaayte!

You forgot the shrimp!

Re:Assumptions ... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734987)

and lay out in the sun.

First, you lie out in the sun.

Then you lay your beer down beside you.

Did I win?

No, grammar defeated you.

Re:Assumptions ... (1)

camperdave (969942) | more than 2 years ago | (#40735211)

Not necessarily. One can lay out in the sun... or rather, two can lay out in the sun.

Re:Assumptions ... (1)

martin-boundary (547041) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734685)

I hope "almost certainly" is droll understatement.

It certainly is.

Nah, timothy's just drolling!

Re:Assumptions ... (1)

umghhh (965931) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734727)

tell me you have patented that already. That seems to be fitting so well with business patents that it would be a pity if it did not get patented

Re:Assumptions ... (3, Funny)

jamesh (87723) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734853)

I hope "almost certainly" is droll understatement.

It certainly is. On the other hand, assume you can send SMSes in a way which is not traceable and comparatively cheap. Assume you want the entire police force of some place - say, New South Wales - to be too busy and way less effective. Assume you want to commit some other crime which would greatly benefit from the police force in that place being too busy chasing phantoms.

What would you do?

Mod you -1, Droll.

Re:Assumptions ... (3, Insightful)

ignavus (213578) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734939)

Assume you want the entire police force of some place - say, New South Wales - to be too busy and way less effective.

What would you do?

Elect Barry O'Farrell as Premier.

Australians Receive SMS Death Threats (5, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734487)

This is a fairly common scam usually received by e-mail. Lot of examples on www.419-eater.com where these types of scammers are known as hitlads.

Re:Australians Receive SMS Death Threats (1)

mjwx (966435) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734677)

This is a fairly common scam usually received by e-mail. Lot of examples on www.419-eater.com where these types of scammers are known as hitlads.

The big difference in this case is that it came in by phone (SMS) and not email, therefore people will assume it's a tasteless prank and ignore it rather than take it seriously.

I'm not joking, people in Oz are a lot smarter about receiving unsolicited commercial messages via phone than email.

Re:Australians Receive SMS Death Threats (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734781)

I'm sure they are in Oz, but that's because there are no phones or internet there. They only have to fear the witch.

Re:Australians Receive SMS Death Threats (2)

mjwx (966435) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734925)

I'm sure they are in Oz, but that's because there are no phones or internet there. They only have to fear the witch.

And dingo's, they take babies you know.

Achmed, is that you?! (0, Offtopic)

dwater (72834) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734489)

I keeeel you!

Re:Achmed, is that you?! (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734711)

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0118826/quotes?qt0270469

Farouk: You have friend, I have friend. My friend go to your house, put bomb under your car and blow you to fucking sky!
Darryl Kerrigan: What did he do?
Farouk: He get scared and he leave!

Re:Achmed, is that you?! (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40735313)

Fucking awful. Crawl back under your rock of poor taste, where watching cultured entertainment is a 'bad thing'.

Oh really? (-1, Offtopic)

Robert Zenz (1680268) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734497)

...and signed with the e-mail address killerking247@yahoo.com.

... ... ...yeah, sounds totally legit! This most be...uuhh...the king of all Hitmen! Or something...

Re:Oh really? (2)

WrongSizeGlass (838941) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734907)

...and signed with the e-mail address killerking247@yahoo.com.

... ... ...yeah, sounds totally legit! This most be...uuhh...the king of all Hitmen! Or something...

It was probably because Killer Queen was taken by Freddie Mercury and the boys back in 1974 ;-)

killerking247@yahoo.com (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734501)

I hope yahoo has some excellent spam filters... And that this piece of news is genuine and not just some personal vendetta against an email addy...

On the bright side... (4, Funny)

arse maker (1058608) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734503)

People who are wanting to commit suicide are finally getting valet service.

When batteries get offended. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734509)

Maybe you'll die when your phone spontaneously combusts?

Re:When batteries get offended. (1)

azalin (67640) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734835)

Hey, not everybody can afford an iphone...

Never had a death threat spam... (2)

jcr (53032) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734531)

But I did get a spam once from someone claiming that he had evidence that would land me in prison, and threatening to report me to the FBI unless I immediately wrote back for instructions on how to pay him.

I did reply with a rather graphic description of the services his parents perform for sailors, and never heard from him again.

-jcr

Re:Never had a death threat spam... (3, Funny)

Chrisq (894406) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734593)

But I did get a spam once from someone claiming that he had evidence that would land me in prison, and threatening to report me to the FBI unless I immediately wrote back for instructions on how to pay him.

Hey, is that you Julian Assange?

Re:Never had a death threat spam... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734787)

Careful, you can get arrested for distributing Child porn.

Almost certainly ass-covering (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734533)

I don't think it's droll understatement. Whoever drafted the response from the authorities has to put that 'almost' in there in case someone does end up dead. Then they can say that they didn't rule out the possibility of them being legitimate.

What is freedom of speech? (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734537)

Among other things, it is the freedom to tell someone that you hate them and want them dead, rather than smiling at them while you speak ill of them behind their back and plot their downfall.

Re:What is freedom of speech? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734551)

I am plotting your downfall as we speak, foul Anonymous Coward.

define "Many Aussies" (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734553)

define "Many Aussies".
20, 1000, 10 000, 100 000, 10 000 000?

Re:define "Many Aussies" (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734613)

It depends whether they're immigrants or not. If immigrant, many=1. If upstanding European, many=more than about 20 million on what is mostly empty land.

Re:define "Many Aussies" (1)

dontclapthrowmoney (1534613) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734681)

Been a big migrant problem here - since 1776...

Re:define "Many Aussies" (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734809)

Indeed. Whitey never thinks he's an immigrant, though, wherever he may be.

Or an occupying force, for that matter.

Re:define "Many Aussies" (1)

Joce640k (829181) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734989)

It depends whether they're immigrants or not

I think they were more of an "export" than immigrants.

Common hired killer scam. (1)

Technician (215283) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734555)

This type of scam is quite common. Why is this news? The anti scam sites are full of stories of these scammers being baited to annoy then. Plug the text phrase into Google and you should find it reported verbatum on anti scam sites and scam baiting sites.

Re:Common hired killer scam. (3, Informative)

shiftyphil (697626) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734631)

Mass SMS message rather than email seems to be the main difference.

Fucking Muzzies (-1, Flamebait)

Chrisq (894406) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734563)

Its a Muzzie wothout brains trying to get funds for Al-Quaida

Re:Fucking Muzzies (1)

wonkey_monkey (2592601) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734623)

Its a Muzzie wothout brains

Yeah, you can tell by the terrible spelling and punctuation. Oh, wait...

trying to get funds for Al-Quaida

Is that Randy and Dennis's dad?

Received a death threat ? (1)

alexibu (1071218) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734571)

Hmmm who to call - the police or the ACCC ? Not sure the ACCC would pop into my head in this situation.

Re:Received a death threat ? (1)

Chrisq (894406) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734587)

Hmmm who to call

Ghost busters!

Add Queensland to list (1)

labnet (457441) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734573)

You can add Queensland to the list. My wife got the 'death threat' SMS. As far as I'm aware, it costs real $ to originate SMS's so hopefully it is traceable.

Re:Add Queensland to list (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734815)

Not always...

Vtext.com

You can send a text to any Verizon # with that for free (its a Verizon site)
For a long while they didn't have a captcha, and still allow you to enter any "from" number as they have no clue what your number is...
You can see how easy it would have been to use the service for something like this or even to use it to prank friends now a days

Killer King? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734599)

Have it your way!

do your worst (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734611)

I'm 9000 miles away from your shack in Nigeria. Do your worst.

um... (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734619)

The last time I checked everything in Australia will kill you in various ways so why would an extra assassin matter? Target a place where everything that moves isn't an assassin.

Related perhaps (1)

TheEffigy (2666397) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734649)

I got a different message, claiming I had won a prize and directing me to some fake website (apple.com.au.kqbfn.com or something along those lines). I live in NSW too, wonder of it was the same guys, I've never had SMS spam before.

Stupidity Tax (5, Funny)

ad454 (325846) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734657)

Reminds me of an old Kids-in-the-Hall skit:

Casher: "And another $5 for the Stupidity Tax."
Customer: "Stupidity Tax? What's that?"
Casher: "Oh, since you asked about it, you don't have to pay."

You previously see the casher successfully get away with charging the tax with the other "stupid" customers.

The reason why we have so much spam and other scams is because there are enough stupid people to make it economically viable.

Are you sure? (1)

ACluk90 (2618091) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734705)

This might not be a scam, the SMS could come from the MPAA: "You all pay us 5000 bucks or we will send over a nuclear missile". Booooom!

Contacting the scammer (2)

fufufang (2603203) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734775)

Has anyone tried contacting killerking247@yahoo.com yet? That email account must be bloody famous right now.

Re:Contacting the scammer (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734855)

I may hope that yahoo has immediately blocked all incoming mail on this account. Only Just enough access to allow the criminal to logon and hopefully expose his location / ip address this way. Small chance, but anyway.

Re:Contacting the scammer (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734999)

I may hope that yahoo has immediately blocked all incoming mail on this account. Only Just enough access to allow the criminal to logon and hopefully expose his location / ip address this way. Small chance, but anyway.

I'm not saying the thread is real (cause it most likely ain't), but if it were real and Yahoo blocked all incoming mail to that account, the targets wouldn't be able to contact the killer and therefore can't paid the 5000, resulting in them being killed.
Wouldn't that make Yahoo an accomplice, if anyone ended up dead?

Re:Contacting the scammer (1)

azalin (67640) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734859)

I'd say the email address turns this otherwise primitive scam into a piece of art. Maybe I should register the .com domain...

Re:Contacting the scammer (2)

MRe_nl (306212) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734893)

It seems to resolve to http://www.whitehouse.gov/assassinations [whitehouse.gov]

Maybe it's legit after all?
Just a new way of fundraising?

Just fantastic... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734833)

Dear Fantastic Delights,
Somewhere, somehow, your vending machine [youtu.be] has taken things way too far mate! And now some bloke bothered to accept that challenge!

The medium is new, the message is not (1)

damn_registrars (1103043) | more than 2 years ago | (#40734917)

Many years ago I received an email claiming to be from Al-Qaeda with an order to kill me. If they are actually trying to kill me, it must from boredom because I haven't seen any other serious effects from it. They also said they would spare my life if I sent them a large sum of cash.

Oddly enough when I replied to them from a throwaway email address asking them for more information they never got back to me.

I GET THESE EVERY DAY !! (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40734977)

From my Ex !!

I thought that was normal !!

Re:I GET THESE EVERY DAY !! (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40735031)

The ones I get are more like

Hello.
You killed my father. Prepare to die.

--
inigo@montoya.info

Maybe only 1 Aussie got Death threat SMS and .... (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 2 years ago | (#40735107)

he confused it with message that he would get 7 years of death if he didn't forward it to 10 people and 100 years of wonderful glorious life if he did.

Please don't kill me, mate (1)

Fear the Clam (230933) | more than 2 years ago | (#40735187)

I've left the money in a brown paper bag on the back deck.

---
Then wait for them to explain why, when they've been watching you all along, they suddenly need to know your address.

USA VER (3, Funny)

Joe_Dragon (2206452) | more than 2 years ago | (#40735317)

IF YOU don't send me $500 I will TXT spam you endlessly and on most plans where you pay up to $0.25 for each TXT it will add up quickly

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