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Physicist Explains Cthulhu's "Non-Euclidean Geometry"

samzenpus posted about a year and a half ago | from the dead-but-dreaming dept.

HP 179

An anonymous reader writes "Mathematician Benjamin K. Tippett has written a fascinating and deadpan paper (Pdf) giving insights into Cthulhu. A 'Bubble' of warped Space-Time makes alarmingly consistent sense of the dead God's cyclopean city under the sea. From the paper: 'We calculate the type of matter which would be required to generate such exotic spacetime curvature. Unfortunately, we determine that the required matter is quite unphysical, and possess a nature which is entirely alien to all of the experiences of human science. Indeed, any civilization with mastery over such matter would be able to construct warp drives, cloaking devices, and other exotic geometries required to conveniently travel through the cosmos.'"

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HP? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41836925)

Bill and Dave were secretly Lovecraft fans?

So it's a Sci-Fi? (2)

tgmarks (2624405) | about a year and a half ago | (#41836927)

So it's a Sci-Fi article?

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837137)

So it's a Sci-Fi article?

Yeah and being sci-fi women know nothing about it. Too much thinking, not enough attention whoring.

Oh and speaking of women getting attention. Are there any Wiccans who are not fat chicks? Never seen anyone deviate from that pattern. They haven't yet invented a spell of losing weight I take it?

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (4, Funny)

jest3r (458429) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837139)

This unphysical non-Euclidean post brought to you by Hewlett Packard.

Cthulhu printers... (2, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41839129)

So THAT'S why the printer ink runs out so quickly... all becomes clear.

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (5, Interesting)

cranq (61540) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837259)

Some good SF has some similar roots...

One example that I like is Charles Stross' Laundry series, which starts with this story: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Atrocity_Archives [wikipedia.org]

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837421)

H.P. Lovecraft had views on other species which carried into real life as well:

Of the complete biological inferiority of the negro there can be no question—he has anatomical features consistently varying from those of other stocks, & always in the direction of the lower primates . . . Equally inferior—& perhaps even more so—is the Australian black stock, which differs widely from the real negro . . . In dealing with these two black races, there is only one sound attitude for any other race (be it white, Indian, Malay, Polynesian, or Mongolian) to take—& that is to prevent admixture as completely & determinedly as it can be prevented, through the establishment of a colour-line & the rigid forcing of all mixed offspring below that line.

And also this:

The same is true of other superior alien races including the Jew—although the Nazis persist in acting on a false biological conception. If they were wise in their campaign to get rid of Jewish cultural influences...they would not emphasize the separatism of the Jew but would strive to make him give up his separate culture & lose himself in the German people.

To conclude, treatises such as those excerpted above, have solidified H.P. Lovecraft's place in the American vernacular as a writer and philosopher far ahead of his time. It is fitting that he is one of Slashdot's favorites, especially given the racial and ethnic makeup of the vast majority of Slashdot's readership.

Don't use transistors, either! (1)

Dr. Manhattan (29720) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838215)

They were invented by a racist, too.

Re:Don't use transistors, either! (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41838973)

Don't forget DNA was 1/3 discovered by a racist, sexist asshat. Stop using DNA, dammit!

(I've converted over to Legos. It hurts, but at least their inventor was a decent human being, even if he was made out of DNA.)

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (3, Interesting)

Jonah Hex (651948) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838219)

HP Lovecraft was a product of his times, and he recanted these views before his death. He also married a Jewish woman, although at the time he did so he still had some strong feelings against immigrants. There are a few really good documentaries on him that go into this aspect of his life.

Also, he's a huge influence on my own work, the Maniac Loveseat series I do especially. - HEX

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (1)

Lord Kano (13027) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838489)

HP Lovecraft was a product of his times, and he recanted these views before his death. He also married a Jewish woman, although at the time he did so he still had some strong feelings against immigrants. There are a few really good documentaries on him that go into this aspect of his life.

Also, he's a huge influence on my own work, the Maniac Loveseat series I do especially. - HEX

That's an excuse. There were many men of his time who did not subscribe to that brand of virulent racism. Marrying a jew doesn't change what he was, according to his own world view, mixing with jewish stock would have improved his own offspring.

LK

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (3, Interesting)

PlusFiveTroll (754249) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838599)

Excuse or reason? If you were born to parents of racists it's highly likely that you would hold their worldview, at least for some time in your life, till you had the knowledge and experience to form opinions otherwise. It is easy now to look into the past and judge, how will history look upon you and judge what you are ignorant in?

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (5, Interesting)

Lord Kano (13027) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838849)

Many people are born into racist families and when they are old enough to discover the world for themselves, they become disabused of the notions that their parents held.

Lovecraft was 22 years old when he penned this gem.

  • When, long ago, the gods created Earth
    In Jove’s fair image Man was shaped at birth.
    The beasts for lesser parts were next designed;
    Yet were they too remote from humankind.
    To fill the gap, and join the rest to Man,
    Th’Olympian host conceiv’d a clever plan.
    A beast they wrought, in semi-human figure,
    Filled it with vice, and called the thing a Nigger.

There is a difference between the ignorance born of unfamiliarity and race hatred. Lovecraft practiced the latter. Lovecraft lived in a time of northern migration of a lot of blacks who sought to escape the crushing racism of the south. So I can surmise that he encountered some black people who fit the stereotypes that were common in his day but to accept such as the norm is akin to meeting one stingy Jew and operating as if they're all Shylock.

Lovecraft was a piece of shit racist. I don't care how many people enjoy his writing.

LK

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (1)

torsmo (1301691) | about a year and a half ago | (#41839073)

It is ironic that the leading figure in Lovecraftian mythos and literature is S.T. Joshi.

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (1)

Jonah Hex (651948) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838865)

Those are not excuses, they are statements of fact, just like his racist views are facts. A minor point, but it was a cultural racism, not a biological one, he was never concerned with "stock" as you put it. He married a Jew because she was "well assimilated" to the New England ideal. Personally I was glad to learn that he moved beyond his upbringing and experiences in New York/Brooklyn and moderated his views before his early death. There are plenty of other figures throughout history that did great things and never considered if their racist views were wrong, including if I'm not mistaken a few of the Founding Fathers. - HEX

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (1)

Lord Kano (13027) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838877)

Those are not excuses, they are statements of fact, just like his racist views are facts. A minor point, but it was a cultural racism, not a biological one, he was never concerned with "stock" as you put it. He married a Jew because she was "well assimilated" to the New England ideal. Personally I was glad to learn that he moved beyond his upbringing and experiences in New York/Brooklyn and moderated his views before his early death. There are plenty of other figures throughout history that did great things and never considered if their racist views were wrong, including if I'm not mistaken a few of the Founding Fathers. - HEX

Yes. The founding fathers either owned slaves themselves or were tolerant of slavery. I view them with similar disdain.

LK

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (1)

bmo (77928) | about a year and a half ago | (#41839019)

So in your opinion, if someone is bad in one area, they are all bad, and they cannot redeem themselves ever?

You must be a lot of fun at parties.

--
BMO

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (1)

aekafan (1690920) | about a year and a half ago | (#41839021)

In the end, I have to so the fark what? If we reject in their entirety the ideas of a person who holds some views that we disagree with, we would quickly have no ideas left Yes he was a racist, but also a good writer. Everyone has bad parts.

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837473)

Appears so. Incidentally Lovecraft's complete works are available in " H.P. Lovecraft The Complete Collection [amazon.com] " for only $2.99. They're a bit of a mind trip to read, but well worth while.

Re:So it's a Sci-Fi? (1)

Evil Pete (73279) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837737)

A spoof scientific article for Halloween, more likely.

A still mainly unexplored genre (5, Insightful)

CRCulver (715279) | about a year and a half ago | (#41836969)

Satirical scientific articles are a field of literature ripe for expansion. The only one I know of to have really found a wide readership (at least among those who follow modern literature) is Georges Perec's Cantatrix Sopranica L. [amazon.com] . Of course, the Sokal hoax paper is also a brilliant piece of writing.

Re:A still mainly unexplored genre (4, Informative)

cranq (61540) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837125)

Along the lines of this classic by Larry Niven... http://www.rawbw.com/~svw/superman.html [rawbw.com]

Re:A still mainly unexplored genre (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837231)

or this one by... ben tippett http://www.qwantz.com/fanart/superman.pdf

Re:A still mainly unexplored genre (1)

Guy Harris (3803) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837327)

Satirical scientific articles are a field of literature ripe for expansion. The only one I know of to have really found a wide readership (at least among those who follow modern literature) is Georges Perec's Cantatrix Sopranica L. [amazon.com] .

Or this paper [inria.fr] .

Of course, the Sokal hoax paper is also a brilliant piece of writing.

And here ya go [nyu.edu] .

Re:A still mainly unexplored genre (1)

CRCulver (715279) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837379)

Or this paper.

Not quite the same thing. You've linked to the short single work "Cantatrix Soprano L.", while the book I linked to at Amazon (an anthology of the same title) includes not only that, but Perec's other faux-scientific articles.

Re:A still mainly unexplored genre (4, Insightful)

smugfunt (8972) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837755)

The Endochronic Properties of Resublimted Thiotimoline [wikipedia.org] by Isaac Asimov.
A spoof chemistry paper which he told Campbell to publish pseudonymously in case it prejudice his upcoming thesis examination. Campbell used his real name, his examiners asked about it, and still gave him his doctorate.

Re:A still mainly unexplored genre (2)

gstoddart (321705) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837935)

Satirical scientific articles are a field of literature ripe for expansion.

I don't think it's so much satirical as a though experiment, albeit slightly bizarre.

It reads more like he took a description of the environment, and said "OK, if we were to experience this, it could be because these things would have to be true".

The material is fanciful, but what he's doing seems like he's doing solid math -- though, I confess, the math is mostly beyond me except in the abstract. But it reads more like Flatland and other things which try to describe Big Concepts with a little fun thrown in.

Conversely, what is the probability that the imagination of a layperson in the 1920â(TM)s would be able to accidentally
describe not just the effects of gravitational lensing but also the consequential anomalous relationship between lines,
angles and areas in a curved space?

Sounds much more like pointing out that there's some pretty accurate descriptions of some cool physics in Lovecraft.

Or, he's really reaching. Like I said, the math is a little beyond me. :-P

Re:A still mainly unexplored genre (1)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837951)

Krugman's Theory of Interstellar Trade
http://www.princeton.edu/~pkrugman/interstellar.pdf [princeton.edu]

Re:A still mainly unexplored genre (1)

steppedleader (2490064) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837969)

I wonder if there are more of these sorts of papers out there than people realize. Maybe a lot of them just don't get much attention outside the field of the writer. On that note, here's a meteorology one: Case Analysis Of A Historic Killer Tornado Event In Kansas On 10 June 1938 [ou.edu]

Mathematician or parapsychologist? (5, Funny)

Horshu (2754893) | about a year and a half ago | (#41836975)

This is the point where his boss should tell him, "The purpose of science is to serve mankind. You seem to regard science as some kind of dodge... or hustle. Your theories are the worst kind of popular tripe, your methods are sloppy, and your conclusions are highly questionable. You are a poor scientist, Dr. Tippett."

Re:Mathematician or parapsychologist? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837087)

no. he went "wow! it went viral. so the trick it to take something that everyone is talking about, slap some math on it, and put it on the internet?" and i went "yeah! the math has to be right or everyone spend all their time nitpicking it though".

Re:Mathematician or parapsychologist? (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837319)

Who p*ssed in your cornflakes? That type of paper is a great way to blow off steam and get the creative juices flowing.

Re:Mathematician or parapsychologist? (2, Insightful)

jaxtherat (1165473) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837519)

Way to miss the Ghostbusters quote dumbass.

Re:Mathematician or parapsychologist? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837591)

i'm going to cry myself to sleep for missing a ghostbusters quote. T_T

Re:Mathematician or parapsychologist? (3, Insightful)

19thNervousBreakdown (768619) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837507)

It's a sad day when there's two people in the world who don't recognize a Ghostbusters quote :(

Re:Mathematician or parapsychologist? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41838147)

Three. At *least*. The line seemed vaguely familiar, but I didn't place it. ...I'm going to have to watch Ghostbusters again, or risk losing my geek card. Thankfully, it's both a good time of year for it and anything but an unpleasant task.

Re:Mathematician or parapsychologist? (3, Funny)

EdIII (1114411) | about a year and a half ago | (#41839163)

The best come back ever came from this movie:

"Yes, it's true. This man has no dick" - Bill Murray.

Gods with pitchforks. (5, Insightful)

Anachragnome (1008495) | about a year and a half ago | (#41836987)

Why the fuck would any self-respecting god need technology? I was always under the impression technology was humanity's attempts at mitigating our shortcomings as NON-Gods.

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837047)

Amen, brother!

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (4, Funny)

RanCossack (1138431) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837065)

What does God need with a starship?

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (1)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837441)

He built this planet on ROCK AND ROLL.

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837511)

Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. (Arthur C. Clarke)

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (1)

Shavano (2541114) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837757)

What does God need with a starship?

That depends. Jefferson or Cobra?

Not the kind of technology you are used to (4, Insightful)

Andy Prough (2730467) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837147)

What would a "God" really be? Someone with vastly higher intelligence, using technology that you can't comprehend. Everything they did would seem magical, mystical, miraculous. Since you couldn't even comprehend their world, all you would be able to do is make up myths and legends and tall tales to explain their "Godliness".

Re:Not the kind of technology you are used to (4, Funny)

tycoex (1832784) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837347)

The Goa'uld are not gods! :)

Re:Not the kind of technology you are used to (0)

viperidaenz (2515578) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837489)

Neither is Thor or his Asgard friends.

Re:Not the kind of technology you are used to (0)

Iceykitsune (1059892) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837505)

We will purge the galaxy of the parasites, if you would simply worship the true gods.
Hallowed Are The Ori.

Re:Not the kind of technology you are used to (2)

runeghost (2509522) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837383)

What about a weakly-godlike entity?

Re:Not the kind of technology you are used to (0)

gmuslera (3436) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837589)

Clarke's 3rd Law [wikipedia.org] probably explain it. Anyway, if you magic is powerful enough you could be considered God in some myths.

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (5, Interesting)

lexarius (560925) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837253)

Keep in mind that most gods are not assumed to be omnipotent, except in a few monotheistic religions. Non-omnipotence implies that they have to obey the basic rules of whatever reality they inhabit, or at least some of them. A non-omnipotent god probably can't do instant teleportation through space. Maybe they can convert themselves into light and travel at light speed, but as far as we know you need to warp space to do better than that. Perhaps they can warp space with willpower alone, but that might be tiring over vast distances. It isn't unusual for a god to be portrayed as using a chariot or steed, so why not a ship? If it's easier for the god to build a warp drive and take a relaxing boat trip across the cosmos, why not? Any sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from technology.

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (0)

felixrising (1135205) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837615)

Arthur C. Clarke's third law: "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic."

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (2)

snadrus (930168) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837663)

I can build a brick house to completion with my bare hands and simple tools, but it's intensively tiring. So instead I use wisdom to find indirect ways to accomplish the same goal (getting a completed house). I'd assume anything more brilliant than I would do the same. Put this way, I'm starting to feel like an "indirect way" myself.

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (2)

Empiric (675968) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837793)

Non-omnipotence implies that they have to obey the basic rules of whatever reality they inhabit, or at least some of them.

Omnipotence generally implies this as well, with respect to the constraints of logical non-contradiction--on the basis of (in brief), if you object that a supposedly omnipotent God cannot, say, make a square circle, you have not in fact identified a limitation on omnipotence, rather, at base you have failed to use language meaningfully.

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (1)

lexarius (560925) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838029)

I'm not talking about drawing square circles or making rocks so heavy even they can't lift them. I'm talking more in the realm of violating relativity, thermodynamics, etc. In my mind, omnipotence is the ability to cause the universe to transition into a state that, while perfectly valid and non-contradictory under the laws of that universe, could not have been reached via any application of said laws from the previous state.

Any sufficiently advanced technology.. (2)

caveat (26803) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837363)

..is indistinguishable from magic, or divinity.

Re:Any sufficiently advanced technology.. (-1, Troll)

Andy Prough (2730467) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837649)

Exactly! We're talking iOS6 Maps, MobileMe, buttonless iPods, fart apps. Really advanced cruft that normal humans couldn't possibly comprehend. All we can do is stand in awe of the "Godlike" hipsters who wield these magical technologies.

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (1)

Agent ME (1411269) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837371)

As technology increases, it becomes more and more indistinguishable from magic.

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (4, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837581)

Lovecraft's various creatures, including Cthulhu and others variously described as "gods", had extraterrestrial origins (eg. "from outer spheres"). Basically the idea was that they were ancient and vastly powerful extra-dimensional beings, not gods in the sense that you're thinking.

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (5, Interesting)

guttentag (313541) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837773)

Why the fuck would any self-respecting god need technology? I was always under the impression technology was humanity's attempts at mitigating our shortcomings as NON-Gods.

First of all: Villagers use pitchforks. Gods use tridents. That being said, the trident is a tool. In theory, mythological gods used tools to do things so they wouldn't have to do things themselves. The most-commonly-used tools of the gods were people. If you have to do everything yourself, you're not a god, you're just that guy in the cubicle at the end of the row who doesn't understand shell scripting.

Re:Gods with pitchforks. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837811)

Wrong impression.

techno-
word-forming element, from Gk. tekhno-, combining form of tekhne "art, skill, craft, method, system," probably from PIE root *tek- "shape, make" (cf. Skt. taksan "carpenter," L. texere "to weave;" see texture).

Technique is ability.

As for Gods, those are rather well defined as "humanity's attempts at mitigating our shortcomings as NON-Gods", so you're at least shooting in the right barrel.

Dead God? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837021)

That is not dead which can eternal lie
And with strange aeons even death may die.

Why settle for the lesser evil? (5, Funny)

stevegee58 (1179505) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837039)

Cthulhu 2012!

Re:Why settle for the lesser evil? (2, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837103)

I demand to see Cthulhu's birth certificate.

Re:Why settle for the lesser evil? (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837273)

I demand to see Cthulhu's Death certificate.

Re:Why settle for the lesser evil? (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837333)

He ain't dead, he's restin'. Remarkable tentacles on him.

Re:Why settle for the lesser evil? (1)

rossdee (243626) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838125)

"He ain't dead, he's restin'"

and don't forget that the Fiords he is pining for were designed and built by Slartibardfast.

Re:Why settle for the lesser evil? (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837283)

Everyone who views the birth certificate goes mad, so it is really hard to verify.

cliche (1)

ZombieBraintrust (1685608) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837475)

Everyone who views the birth certificate goes mad, so it is really hard to verify.

You can't prove a negative without non-Euclidean geometry.

Re:Why settle for the lesser evil? (1)

Grayhand (2610049) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837435)

I demand to see Cthulhu's birth certificate.

Actually if he came from another dimension that occupied the same space as the US he could conceivable claim citizenship. McCain had a bigger stretch since he was born in Panama.

Re:Why settle for the lesser evil? (1)

Lord Kano (13027) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838505)

Doesn't matter where McCain was born. His parents were citizens, he's a citizen.

That's the thing that pisses me off the most about those idiot birthers. It doesn't matter if Obama was born in Hawaii, Nairobi or on the moon. His mother was a citizen, he's a citizen.

LK

Re:Why settle for the lesser evil? (1)

RubberDogBone (851604) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838859)

Well, that doesn't matter. Most of the birther challengers fundamentally reject the idea that the man is legitimate, reject that he possibly can even BE president, and basically have pushed themselves into a logic corner where something cannot possibly be true, so it is simply not true regardless of facts, paperwork, evidence one way or the other, and so on. So, in their eyes, he is not a citizen because he cannot be. That's all. There is no other answer.

The alternative -that he is a citizen and was a legitimate candidate- is too difficult to even consider, so it is automatically not true. It cannot be true. It is not true. Done.

This is some of the same thinking I see around UFOs and aliens and the like. Regardless of whether it's true or not, there are many people who feel, without doing any investigation, that none of it can possibly be true because the alternative, if it IS true, is impossible to accept. So, it is not true. Done.

Whether it's true or not is not material. The problem comes when you choose a position (It's not true, or it is true; either way) and decide you'll never change, regardless of any investigation or evidence or lack thereof. A more scientific approach is to consider what the evidence tells you and then form a conclusion. Most people can't or won't keep an open mind long enough on anything to ever do that. Snap judgment is more the rule, especially in politics. Or little grey men.

It's a bit like closing your eyes and pretending the car about to run you over is not actually there because you can't see it any more. And it you cannot see it, it's not there and not about to run you over. Done. Whether you can see it, or whether you believe evidence or not, does not change the fact that you might not enjoy what is about to happen.

Re:Why settle for the lesser evil? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837527)

Cthulhu 2012!

We don't need your pagan muslim socialist "old ones" in AMERICA!

Nehemiah Scudder 2012!!

Fitted Sheets (5, Funny)

ShakaUVM (157947) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837053)

If you truly wish to understand non-Euclidean geometry, simply try putting those damn fitted sheets on a bed. No matter which way you rotate it, you always end up with the short side in your hands.

It is enough to drive a man insane.

Re:Fitted Sheets (2)

oodaloop (1229816) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837089)

That's why I always buy sheets with vertical stripes. As long as the stripes are going foot to head, instead of side to side, the sheet will always fit.

Re:Fitted Sheets (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837151)

That's why I never buy sheets.

Re:Fitted Sheets (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837211)

No. Your mom buys them for you and tosses them down the stairs to you every couple of weeks.

Re:Fitted Sheets (1)

Svartormr (692822) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837335)

And then they alternate between fitting either way and not fitting at all. Obviously what we see is a malluable 3-dimension slice of a complex multidimensional object that is rotated by the one multidimensional manipulation tool we currently possess: the tumble dryer.

Re:Fitted Sheets (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837227)

Which is why you start at the end of the bed, not the side.

Re:Fitted Sheets (1)

ShakaUVM (157947) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838193)

Doesn't matter. All the sides are the short side.

Re:Fitted Sheets (3, Insightful)

SQLGuru (980662) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837407)

It's even worse when you try to figure out how to fold them.......

Re:Fitted Sheets (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41838189)

Here ya go:
How to fold a fitted sheet [youtube.com]

Hmm... (2)

tool462 (677306) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837195)

As long as the exotic matter isn't made of midichlorians, we can still be friends.

Re:Hmm... (2)

jd2112 (1535857) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837401)

As long as the exotic matter isn't made of midichlorians, we can still be friends.

This just in : Disney has bought out the. H.P. Lovecraft estate. A Star Wars/Marvel/Cthuluhu/Disney Princess animated film is rumored to be in production.

Re:Hmm... (2)

Grayhand (2610049) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837485)

As long as the exotic matter isn't made of midichlorians, we can still be friends.

This just in : Disney has bought out the. H.P. Lovecraft estate. A Star Wars/Marvel/Cthuluhu/Disney Princess animated film is rumored to be in production.

Sorry it's all public domain. His aunts died years ago and the last issues over so shared ownership rights expired. The rights have been questionable for years since it was mostly August Derleth claiming he changed a number of stories and got them republished as collections. All that has expired and he's been dead a long time. Even Burrough's stuff is entering public domain. It's why they were able to make that cheesy A Princess of Mars film, I mean the cheapie one not the big budget cheesy film which Disney had in development for decades.

Re:Hmm... (3, Insightful)

gman003 (1693318) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837685)

Sorry it's all public domain.

And since when has that stopped Disney from claiming "ownership" of something?

Re:Hmm... (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837595)

You're a fucking dolt who doesn't know shit about Lovecraft or copyright laws. In any case, I hope the 2112 in your name isn't a Rush reference because I'd hate to think a total dickweed like you has anything to do with Rush.

Re:Hmm... (1)

SternisheFan (2529412) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837605)

This just in : Disney has bought out the. H.P. Lovecraft estate. A Star Wars/Marvel/Cthuluhu/Disney Princess animated film is rumored to be in production.

I'm glad Lucas sold to Disney, if he hadn't we'd never have this p.r. pic... http://www.irishtimes.com/newspaper/features/2012/1101/1224325975225.html [irishtimes.com]

Just wondering about the tags.. (4, Insightful)

Sangui5 (12317) | about a year and a half ago | (#41837247)

..but HP?

Is the new printer lineup Lovecraftian? Has Meg Whitman been conducting dark rituals? Is Itanium powered by the souls of the innocent?

Wouldn't MS be more appropriate? I'm pretty sure IE is *actually* powered by the souls of the innocent, and there certainly is something evil about the entire OS lineup.

Re:Just wondering about the tags.. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837439)

Guess what Lovecraft's first two initials are.

Re:Just wondering about the tags.. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837585)

Shoulda just used Lovecraft. Since HP could also mean Harry Potter.

Re:Just wondering about the tags.. (3, Funny)

tftp (111690) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838231)

Is Itanium powered by the souls of the innocent?

You cannot power anything with the souls of the innocent. There are too few of those to have commercial value.

Just a test (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837661)

This was just a test to see if anyone actually read the physics abstracts he submitted - like stuffing unexpected verbiage into a EULA just to see if anyone notices.

The Great K’Chu and Bl’Syu (near Delaw (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41837883)

Didn't Mark E. Rodgers already relate non-Euclidean geometry in regards to the Great K’Chu and Bl’Syu (spoofs of Cathulu)?

Bel-Shamharoth? (1)

Opyros (1153335) | about a year and a half ago | (#41838509)

That may take care of Cthulhu, but what about the geometry of the Temple of Bel-Shamharoth? It had a tessellation made of octagons. Assuming that they were convex octagons, what kind of non-euclidean geometry would be necessary for such a tiling to exist? (In euclidean geometry, no convex polygon with more than six sides can possibly tile the plane.)

Re:Bel-Shamharoth? (2)

HalfFlat (121672) | about a year and a half ago | (#41839079)

This, too, might be accommodated in a space of negative curvature: hyperbolic space admits a tiling by regular octagons [wikipedia.org] .

WTF is the HP logo for? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about a year and a half ago | (#41838719)

Why the HP logo?

Zermelo-Fraenkel-Cthulhu set theory (5, Interesting)

howlingfrog (211151) | about a year and a half ago | (#41839099)

Back in college, a friend and I were trying to figure out what could possibly make people go mad from the mere sight of Cthulhu. We decided it must have uncountably infinitely many tentacles. A mere countable infinity of tentacles could be visually comprehensible, so long as each one is half the size of its predecessor, or if they were arranged in a fractal tree structure of tentacles upon tentacles. But uncountably many tentacles would drive you insane at first sight.
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