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Ask Slashdot: How Do I Explain That Humans Didn't Ride Dinosaurs?

samzenpus posted 1 year,19 days | from the but-they-probably-did dept.

Science 278

p00kiethebear writes "I have a wonderful and beautiful girlfriend who treats me right in every way. We've been together for almost a year now and everything seemed to be going perfectly until this morning. Over breakfast we were discussing dinosaurs and she told me a story about how her grandfather, fifty years ago, dated footprints of a dinosaurs and a man that were right next to each other to be within the same epoch of history. I laughed when she said this and then realized that she wasn't joking. She believes dinosaurs and humans walked at the same time together. The odd thing is that she's not religious, it's just what her archaeologist grandfather taught her. More important than just backing up evidence to the contrary, how do I explain this to her without crushing her childhood dreams? Is it even worth discussing it further with her?"

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278 comments

Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddle! (5, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331595)

Yes, I'm serious. Really this is one of the fundamental flaws in geeks. Do not fuck up a relationship making your girlfriend feel bad over something that happened 165 million years ago. I know the geek think is: "This is a gateway problem that leads to the entirety of all mystical belief and ruins the world." Shitcan that garbage, now!

A person's religion is rarely entirely from the church, it's a blend things they've heard and want to believe and things their parents believed in addition to church input. Don't treat this any differently than arguing against any other "invisible man in the sky who rights all wrongs and gives us eternal life for being nice people and giving money to the church" belief system.

Let it go. If (and only if) she asks for your help, take her to some museums and do research *with* her and let the overwhelming body of scientific evidence change her mind, not the guy who wants to take her shirt off. If science is not at risk of losing that capability.

You have been warned!

Re:Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddl (1)

gandhi_2 (1108023) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331635)

Brontosaurus.

What else did they lie to us about?

Re:Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddl (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331829)

Brontosaurus.

What else did they lie to us about?

The Flinstones was a thinly veiled documentary...and I really could go for a Sonic Brontoburger

Re:Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddl (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331637)

I want to ride a dinosaur...

Re:Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddl (5, Funny)

Hatta (162192) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331787)

I heard they discovered a lesbian dinosaur. They named it Lickalotopus.

Re:Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddl (3, Funny)

Reverand Dave (1959652) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331815)

And it's male counterpart Rompasaurass

Re:Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddl (4, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43332001)

I thought it was Megasoreass.

Re:Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddl (1)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331927)

Let it go. If (and only if) she asks for your help, ...

Assuming said relationship progresses to (optionally marriage and) children, there's no way to dodge the subject. It's one thing to let this woman live with her own beliefs and another to pass it on to another generation.

Re:Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddl (1)

fermion (181285) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331949)

Anything you say to a person such as this sounds exactly like if you the ROT13 text of this site. Such people do not have the basis to understand the logic. I am not saying anything bad against such people. A friend of mine believes that going to church makes you rich and happy. It is not up to me to change that. We all have things other people disagree with, some of it is what we might consider factually proven, so it is hard for us to keep out mouths such. It is a trade off. Enjoy the company and the sex, or give it up and find someone who is more on your wavelength.

Re:Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddl (1)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331969)

This was another lame April fools. If you were in any doubt, the first sentence should have given it away.

Re:Nooooooo! Just shut up and buy a dinosaur saddl (5, Funny)

TheDarkMaster (1292526) | 1 year,19 days | (#43332005)

I have a wonderful and beautiful girlfriend who treats me right in every way

This part is a April's Fool day prank.

Catholicism (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43332041)

Let it go. If (and only if) she asks for your help, take her to some museums and do research *with* her and let the overwhelming body of scientific evidence change her mind, not the guy who wants to take her shirt off. If science is not at risk of losing that capability.

Or try to convert her to Catholicism, which has no problem with paleontology and geology:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pierre_Teilhard_de_Chardin
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nicolas_Steno

Reason tends to be more appreciated as well:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fides_et_Ratio

Sorry. (3, Informative)

tverbeek (457094) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331597)

"Is it even worth discussing it further with her?"

No.

Re:Sorry. (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331641)

OH HO HO! You almost had me, Slashdot... you would have succeeded, until I realized that nobody on Slashdot has a girlfriend!

Re:Sorry. (0)

Idbar (1034346) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331733)

How Do I Explain That Humans Didn't Ride Dinosaurs?

I'll go with you. By Betteridge, the answer is of course: NO.

Re:Sorry. (2)

Bigby (659157) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331859)

It is a decent, but non scientific, philosophical question. We can prove dinosaurs wandered the earth millions of years ago and we can prove the current chain of hominids wandered the earth 2 million years ago through now. However, you can't prove or disprove that similar hominids wandered the earth at the time of the dinosaurs. It is like proving ghosts don't exist. One could ask, "where are the bones?". Maybe they we just haven't found them or maybe they dissolve/erode easily or maybe aliens took them away.

No argument you can make against dinosaurs and hominids living side-by-side can be "disproven". It is only "unsubstantiated".

Re:Sorry. (3, Insightful)

hackula (2596247) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331935)

To rational humans "unsubstantiated" means "I don't believe it". The alternative is "I just believe in things that make me happy".

Re:Sorry. (0, Flamebait)

Dog-Cow (21281) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331971)

Wow. You really don't get out much, do you? All sorts of rational people believe things that are unsubstantiated. I bet you believe dozens, if not hundreds of such things. Of course, one could argue whether someone who makes such a ridiculous statement as yours is entirely rational.

Sigh (3, Insightful)

gravis777 (123605) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331609)

Why do I even bother to come to Slashdot on April first?

Re:Sigh (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331939)

Huh. I *only* bother to come to Slashdot on April first...

Have to admit to being slightly let down this year, though.

Sad (4, Insightful)

hondo77 (324058) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331627)

It's sad that things are so stupid in the US right now [creationmuseum.org] that I can't tell if this story is fake or not.

Re:Sad (0)

chromaexcursion (2047080) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331683)

Oh so true. Oh so sad. Even sadder is that all the stupid sheep vote, and too many not so stupid people don't.

Re:Sad (1)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331989)

I've never met an intelligent person who uses "sheep" in this manner.

Re:Sad (5, Funny)

misanthropic.mofo (1891554) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331687)

I'm actually planning a trip with several friends to visit that horrible place and troll the fuck out of those fools. It's going to be hilarious.

Re:Sad (4, Interesting)

CdBee (742846) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331947)

Some reporters did that when it first opened, found that almost all of the museum staff were quite willing to admit that it was all nonsense and that none of them were qualified in any related field, and weren't expected to offer any sort of analysis or insight...

Re:Sad (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331713)

At least you get to feel superior to every one else right? http://xkcd.com/774/

Re:Sad (1)

whoever57 (658626) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331805)

It's sad that things are so stupid in the US right now that I can't tell if this story is fake or not.

That's easy, the first sentence gives it away:

" .... I have a wonderful and beautiful girlfriend who treats me right in every way."

This is /., so that sentence is clearly a fake.

Re:Sad (2)

hackula (2596247) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331959)

It really baffles me how young earthers can still exist in an age of (mostly) free information. I guess its pretty much the same reason people drank the kool aid with jim jones.

I have walked the seven lands of Dragons (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331633)

... And saw that once the land had been poisoned with the flesh and bones of the Lords of the past. They shall rule the lords of the present with everlasting scales of Armor riding below their hands and feast to the morning of the long lasting Day. I have no idea what I just said, but this should be related to Dinos somehow, yes ?

Re:I have walked the seven lands of Dragons (1)

CdBee (742846) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331961)

Dinosaur fossils were well known in some parts of the ancient world long before the writing of the holy books of the Abrahamic religions, mainly China where they were revered, dug out and eaten as medicine (dragon bones!). International flows of knowledge have happened for a very long time, its probably a reference to one of those areas where fossils were plentiful and evidently monstrous.

figured this one out right away (1)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331643)

You can tell this is an April Fools joke because it's a slashdot user saying "I have a ... girlfriend"

Humans didn't ride dinosaurs. (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331649)

Dinosaurs rode humans. I thought everyone knew that.

Pbcl-cnfgn sbbq sbe gubhtug (1, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331653)

Fpvragvfgf unir qvfpbirerq gung znal bs gur fhccbfrq uhzna genpxf ner va snpg "angheny veerthynevgvrf naq rebfvbany srngherf bs gur fhofgengr [...] rybatngr, zrgngnefny qvabfnhe genpxf...znqr ol qvabfnhef gung, ng yrnfg ng gvzrf, vzcerffrq gurve fbyrf naq urryf nf gurl jnyxrq" (Xhona 1992). Bsgra gur gbr znexf bs gur qvabfnhe genpxf ner fbzrjung svyyrq va, pnhfvat gurz gb erfrzoyr irel ynetr uhzna sbbgcevagf. Jura gur svyyvat frqvzrag vf erzbirq gur genpxf ner pyrneyl znqr ol n guerr-gbrq qvabfnhe. Xhona tbrf ba gb jevgr gung "Erprag pynvzf gung fbzr bs gurfr genpxf unir uhzna cevagf jvguva gurz unir orra fubja gb or nf onfryrff nf gur bevtvany pynvzf" (Xhona 1992).

How do you define "ride"? (-1)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331659)

Technically, according to modern-day research, we did "ride" dinosaurs. However, we were incapable of getting to the top and instead inserted our erect phallic objects into their buttocks and sometimes vaginal cores (which created the word "dino sores" eventually leading to "dinosaurs"), and this produced primates similar to that of the Kardashianus Magnimus. Please redirect her to any random Wikipedia page.

Actually it's even worse (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331661)

If I wanted to think evil, somebody at ./ wants to get a big peak of logged-in users for some good stats to user later on..

ok, I might be wrong..but still looks like a cheap april 1st joke

Re:Actually it's even worse (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331867)

Be gurl bja n ebg13 genafyngbe ba gur jro jvgu ybgf bs nqf naq ner gelvat gb znxr n ohapu bs zbarl.

Huh? (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331679)

Are you implyifacting they didn't?

Oh, But They Did (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331681)

Oh, but they did [wordpress.com] my friend, they most certainly did.

They did. I have photographic evidence. (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331685)

See, I have photos, and they were taken before Photoshop was invented, so therefore, they can't be photoshopped.

The nerd answer? Easy. (5, Funny)

conner_bw (120497) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331689)

Build a time machine that transports you and your girlfriend to the spot that her grandfather discovered the footprints.

Look around. "See? Just dinosaurs. No humans here except us. Sorry dear."

Thus proving that her grandfather was right and saving your relationship.

Re:The nerd answer? Easy. (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331707)

Gura xvyy ure tenaqsngure. V'z cerggl fher gung'f ubj gur tenaqsngure cnenqbk jbexf.

Re:The nerd answer? Easy. (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331843)

yby

Re:The nerd answer? Easy. (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331767)

If I take a time machine back for that, I'm gonna ride a dinosaur!

Re:The nerd answer? Easy. (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331869)

It must have been your footprints she saw.

Re:The nerd answer? Easy. (1)

hackula (2596247) | 1 year,19 days | (#43332007)

Build a time machine that transports you and your girlfriend to the spot that her grandfather discovered the footprints.

... then give the guy a nice hard kick to the jewels and do humanity a favor. Two birds with one stone: one less moron, one less moron who happens to be your girlfriend.

Enough is enough (4, Funny)

JoeMirando (594743) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331697)

Can we PLEASE dispense with the silly encryption bullshit? If I wanted something that was impossible to read, I'd go to FOXNEWS

Re:Enough is enough (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331775)

Can we PLEASE dispense with the silly encryption bullshit? If I wanted something that was impossible to read, I'd go to FOXNEWS

To be honest, I thought the ROT-13 stuff was only going to be applied to the summaries leading to fake stuff. And at that, I thought, hey, that's a great idea! If it's clearly flagged what's the fake articles and what isn't, the bitchy old nerds whose collective sense of humor is long dead^W^W obviously soooo much more advanced and refined than ours, insert exaggerated mocking jerk-off gestures here, would be able to ignore them and stop complaining endlessly.

But, as evidenced, that didn't happen, and every April Fool's Day article is flooded with people who took the time to click through to the properly un-ROT-13'd text JUST so they could complain. Clearly, these people just like complaining, so Slashdot isn't even going to try anymore and everything's getting ROT-13'd today, bitches. Deal with it.

Re:Enough is enough (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331865)

Can you whiny ass titty babies get over it and stop filling the comment section with your griping? CAN YOU?

captcha word: annoyed

Re:Enough is enough (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331915)

Fynfuqbg vf hfvat gur EBG13 rapelcgvba fpurzr nf n QEZ zrnfher. Gubfr jub unir orra sbhaq gb pvephzirag vg va nal jnl ner thvygl haqre gur QZPN.

Humans like dinosaurs ? (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331699)

A video showing a cyclist being hit by a car : Accident [youtube.com]

Don't. (1)

Ken_g6 (775014) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331703)

Because humans have ridden dinosaurs [thezooom.com].

Re:Don't. (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331891)

It was actually the Neanderthals that rode them but did not live to tell us about it. Musta been one hell of a ride on those veloceraptors.

Re:Don't. (1)

Ken_g6 (775014) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331997)

You didn't click the link, did you? Because the dinosaur that girl is riding is clearly not a velociraptor. Though it is a two-legged dinosaur.

You have proof they didn't? (-1)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331749)

In fact, I think some of the paleontological evidence has some unexplained appearances of human foot prints right next to those of the dinosaurs. Not riding them but walking next to them.

Re:You have proof they didn't? (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43332015)

There are real dinosaur footprints in Texas and some of the more eroded ones kinda-sorta are in the realm of size and shape that if you squint hard enough, and believe strong enough almost look human. The ones that looked like actual footprints were faked by creationists.

One potential solution (0)

redmid17 (1217076) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331757)

Just beat her until she agrees with you or can't understand why you're reaching out to humans via cyphered messages. It will establish dominance and put some god damn sense into her.

ROT13 (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331769)

Hoy! Why don't you ROT13 the sites name, the header and everything else too, and go into oblivion? This is irritating to say the least. One message is an Aplir fools joke, all of them makes for disappearance from the internet...

So I'm logged in, how do I turn off this ROT13 bul (1)

dbryson (2401) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331779)

Subject says it all!

Re:So I'm logged in, how do I turn off this ROT13 (1)

dbryson (2401) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331793)

Guess it cut off the subject. It said "How do I turn off this ROT13 bullshit!"

Re:So I'm logged in, how do I turn off this ROT13 (1)

kannibal_klown (531544) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331845)

It's part of April Fool's Day.

I imagine it will disappear tomorrow, at least from the new / real news items.

Re:So I'm logged in, how do I turn off this ROT13 (1)

Quirkz (1206400) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331889)

Subject says it all!

He he he he he.

Seriously, though, wait until tomorrow. It'll all go away.

Take her on a field trip! (4, Insightful)

Medievalist (16032) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331795)

She's got to be talking about Paluxy.

http://paleo.cc/paluxy/tsite.htm [paleo.cc]

You need to recognize that your own knowledge of the past is at least as bad as hers (if you didn't already know about Paluxy) so that you won't come across to her as some kind of paternally condescending authority figure. That's bad for your love life!

And you know, if her grandfather was involved in the discovery or documentation of Paluxy, that's awesome and you should celebrate that. Take her to the site! The two of you can look at the actual real life data personally and come to some sort of conclusion together. That would be a lot less stupid than fostering discord because "my authority figures contradict your authority figures" which is what you are looking at doing right now. Have you seen the tracks? I think not, so her opinion (which was possibly passed from a person who actually saw them) is at least as valid as your hearsay beliefs.

Most likely, when you both visit the site, you will find that one or the other explanation is more likely, and you'll both benefit regardless of who is right. Real Science is Fun.

I really... (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331799)

really...wish this one was real just to read the inevitable comments.

Simple: it's not in the bible (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331821)

Since the bible doesn't mention humans riding dinosaurs, the book is for once right on an issue.

Give in - humans certainly do! (video enclosed) (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331861)

It's simple. You give in. Say the evidence is undeniable that humans do ride dinosaurs, and after you carefully reconsidered the question for a while, you now accept the evidence. Admit it to them. Then send them to these links as examples:
here [youtube.com], here [youtube.com], and this one ("you can ride it" - lol) [youtube.com].

Dude, she and the dinosaur riding man are fiction (0)

scorp1us (235526) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331871)

"I have a wonderful and beautiful girlfriend who treats me right in every way" - there's your April fool's right there.

Just sayin' (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331875)

Anyone notice that the first 154 characters of the summary paragraph take 6 bits at a time
is the BD aacs master key? When I plug'd that value into VLC - boom! I could play Blu-rays! Wow!

CAPTCHA = quoted, but don't quote me on this...

Your Argument? (1)

AwooOOoo (1081997) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331881)

Provide the same rational argument you used to convince yourself... ...If you don't have one you might ask yourself if you have any better claim that the people that do claim that humans rode them. The obvious argument is, what about the meat-eaters, they'd eat you? This doesn't mean no-one tried, just that their success was likely short-lived. =)

Fred Flintstone (1)

marcovje (205102) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331905)

Your story will make a great no 1 on the "Signs you watched too much Fred Flintstone as a child" list

Damn.. (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331907)

Your plight so touched my fellow scientists that we got together and decided that, since this isn't an issue about religion, we're going to give up on this whole "the dinosaurs didn't co-exist with humans" thing. After all, it was just a theory, a hunch, so why crush people's dreams over it?

Tell your gf that it's all good, and that her grandpa wasn't going senile when he did that work. In fact, we've nominated him as a "scientific hero," and will get back to you when the awards ceremony is over to tell you how he did.

It'll be close, though, since there was an amazing dog-saves-a-kitten story that just happened which forced us to reevaluate this whole "natural selection" nonsense..

Oh come on... (0)

mark_reh (2015546) | 1 year,19 days | (#43331925)

no one can be THAT stupid (home schooled?)! If she really believes that people and dinosaurs were around at the same time, it's time for you to find a new girlfriend. I suggest you look for someone with at least half a brain.

In Texas... (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43331937)

But, here in Texas, we STILL ride dinosaurs.

My girlfriend (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43332031)

My girlfriend swears that she saw a dinosaur walk across a lawn when she was a child and she's sharp and not prone to B.S.
Go figure.

Leave her belief alone (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43332037)

In this case, leave her belief alone. She is happy, you are happy. She has this harmless belief that something before recorded history was 63 million years off from most people. No big deal. At least she doesn't have an invisible friend like my wife...

You assume you are right. (0)

Anonymous Coward | 1 year,19 days | (#43332045)

Dragons are in many different cultures.

she's right (1)

hymie! (95907) | 1 year,19 days | (#43332047)

I'm sorry to break it to you, but I was just watching a documentary about prehistoric times. The story centered around a couple named Fred and Wilma. Not only did they have a pet dinosaur, but they interacted with dinosaurs on a regular basis -- public transportation, household appliances, heavy machinery.

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