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Pillars Underwater

Hemos posted more than 13 years ago | from the pretty-cool-idea dept.

Science 149

iammichael writes "Scientists scouring the Atlantic Ocean have found huge towers of stone (the tallest ever) that they've named the "The Lost City" since they are located on a seafloor mountain named Atlantis Massif. Read about it on Yahoo news or CNN"

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Later that afternoon, (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 13 years ago | (#90570)

lawyers from Disney Corporation filed suit against U of W for devaluing the name of the Atlantis animated franchise. The city of Anaheim subsequently assessed back taxes against Disney for this (very slowly) mobile property.

Re:Um... (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 13 years ago | (#90571)

And the name of the king of Tir na nOg?

I mean it's not to far of a jump from Aztlan to Atlantis and Altan....

Re:Found it (1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 13 years ago | (#90572)

here's a working link [] , you turd.

Phil's underwear?!? (2)

Anonymous Coward | more than 13 years ago | (#90573)

You know it's been a long night when /. headlines start looking even stranger than usual.



Anonymous Coward | more than 13 years ago | (#90574)


Intercept: 1123984 Channel: 59876

Subject: DP Base Control

Date: 01:00:32 7/11/2001 UTC

Summary: This is is an intercept from DP Base to control indicting the discovery of base 68 and imminent discovery of base 69. Partial decoded transcript follows. It is recommended that action be taken ASAP to prevent the movement from 69 to 70.

To Home Base

From Deep Piller 69

They are found our base 68. We must move our to base 70 or we will be overrun by newcomers. Deep portions of base 68 under attack by bright lights and something calling itself nnc or cnn. Server under attack by something called dot slash or slash dot or dot slash dot. Recommend move to 70 when feasible.

Re:Um... (5)

Anonymous Coward | more than 13 years ago | (#90575)

Chances are, in my opinion, America _was_ atlantis- plato's map of the capital of atlantis was still similar to the centre of Aztlan at the time the Spanish found it, at least a millenium after the events Plato chronicled were supposed to have taken place. I think conventional wisdom has kept quiet the extent of european-american contact in early history - And there's the roman remains recently found in the gulf, suggesting at least a little early european-american contact.

Interestingly, Irish legend places one of the parent races of the Irish people, coming from the west, with advanced technology (for the time - including a prosthetic hand???) - though it must be pointed out that anyone coming by sea from africa or the mediterranean will also finally approach Ireland from the south-west. But Irish legend places the kingdom of the immortals, Tir na nOg, to the west, across the ocean. In fact, every sea-going european race extant at or a bit before plato's time talks about land to the far west of europe....

Re:Anime Rip Off (1)

Alex Belits (437) | more than 13 years ago | (#90576)

Yeah, now we just need to find out, who has the stone that matches them. With the luck our civilization had recently, I would guess, it's either Gates, Bush or Arafat ;-P

Re:Whoa. Revelation! (1)

torpor (458) | more than 13 years ago | (#90577)

And, thankfully, the reproductive opportunities present in both cases lets Mamma Nature do the weedin' ...

Whoa. Revelation! (5)

torpor (458) | more than 13 years ago | (#90578)

Thermophiles, the only inhabitants of the Lost City, include archaea, a recently discovered class of organisms which scientists believe are among the most primitive on earth.

Right above NT Administrators, yet only a couple rungs below /. readers.

Disney (1)

Falrick (528) | more than 13 years ago | (#90579)

Will Disney know no shame? It's obviously a publicity stunt for their newest animated flick.

No... (2)

Danse (1026) | more than 13 years ago | (#90580)

It should be "The Previously Lost, But Recently Found City."

Re:Um... (1)

osu-neko (2604) | more than 13 years ago | (#90582)

It should be noted that there's this wonderful current running by Europe that flows right across the Atlantic to the Carribean. With good weather and a little luck, you could take a makeshift raft from Europe to America! The idea that, in all those years of seafaring, no one from Europe managed to get to America is pretty far fetched, even if it wasn't until much later that systematic exploration and cross-Atlantic commerce began...


Re:Fairly meaningless (1)

osu-neko (2604) | more than 13 years ago | (#90583)

If you'd bothered to actually read the article, you would know (a) these newly discovered pillars are not volcanic per se (unlike the previously known, darker pillars found in spread zones), they build up due to chemical reactions, and (b) the largest ever discovered is 180 feet -- these are not things that build up for millions of years to make islands.


Oh great ... (3)

MouseR (3264) | more than 13 years ago | (#90587)

Disney marketing just reached new depths ...

Karma karma karma karma karmeleon: it comes and goes, it comes and goes.

Some FAR more interesting underwater structures... (5)

GPS Pilot (3683) | more than 13 years ago | (#90590)

...have been discovered near Cuba. Far more interesting, because the principle investigators believe they're man made.

And they're not merely a 2200-year-old city in shallow water like the one recently-discovered off the coast of Egypt -- these structures are 800 meters deep, and must be far older.

If this discovery is verified, it'll be huge.

Read about it on a mainstream site [] (MSNBC -- quick, grab it before it disappears from Google's cache!)
or get more detail from this fringe site [] .

Re:Fairly meaningless (2)

unitron (5733) | more than 13 years ago | (#90592)

You're thinking of that other ark, the ark of the covenant, in which they kept the stone tablets on which the ten commandments were carved.

Black Smokers come on shore sometimes... (2)

rthille (8526) | more than 13 years ago | (#90595)

You've probably seen the videos of black smokers giving off what looks like soot on the ocean floor. Well, sometimes they get carried across the ocean floor with the plate, but instead of getting carried into the subduction zone, they get scraped off onto shore. You can find the remains of one if these in the back country of Santa Barbara, CA.

Re:In other news. (1)

toriver (11308) | more than 13 years ago | (#90597)

I still can't see the fnords.

Ah, you're pining for the fnords!

Re:Misinformation Capitalizing on the Atlantis Mov (2)

davebo (11873) | more than 13 years ago | (#90598)

> when everyone just saw the Atlantis movie . . .

You were disappointed?

Imagine thier disappointment when they realized that NOBODY saw the Atlantis movie!

Re:Later that afternoon, (1)

domc (11897) | more than 13 years ago | (#90599)

Just to pick a nit:



Re:Eh? (1)

An Ominous Coward (13324) | more than 13 years ago | (#90600)

And notice after the setup for "I speak Atlantean"... the fuckers ordering the food UNDERSTAND AND SPEAK ENGLISH. Damn, I hate McDonalds.

Re:Misinformation Capitalizing on the Atlantis Mov (1)

kevlar (13509) | more than 13 years ago | (#90601)

Not only was the headline misleading but Slashdot capitalized on it as well. I guess they learned the trick of putting misleading headlines just to get a click. Lame.

Re:Whoa. Revelation! (1)

sharkey (16670) | more than 13 years ago | (#90602)

So, instead of a pig party, would you invite them to a Reboot/Reformat/Reinstall party?


Re:Um... (3)

MindStalker (22827) | more than 13 years ago | (#90604)

The Yahoo article in amazingly deceptive if you only read the first few paragraphs. The stone towers are actually natually formed volcanic vents. Its just that because they are so huge and are found in "Atlantis" the scientist thought it would be cute to call this formation of rocks the "Lost City". It is NOT Atlantis.

Re:That was news (1)

SMITHEE (26773) | more than 13 years ago | (#90605)

That's because, to most of the clowns in the news media, a scientific event doesn't happen until the resulting paper is published in "Nature."

Re:Coast to Coast AM (1)

Ozric (30691) | more than 13 years ago | (#90606)

I listen to him on the way home. I think they have found something more intresting off the cost of Cuba. This is what I would like to see. I hope his back gets better.

As much as I'd like to believe it... (2)

macdaddy (38372) | more than 13 years ago | (#90607)

...the "18-story-high towers of stone" boggle my mind to the point where I can't really see how human back then could have built such a thing. I don't know how tall the Pyramids are but still, that's really friggin' tall. It would be really cool if it really was Atlantis or some other great city or structure lost for centuries. The Yahoo article says that the pillars were found near "volcanic fault ridges". Is it possible that these pillars are really volcanic lava vents that once filled with lava and cooled to form a tall columns of igneous rock and that somehow the surounding ocean floor (silt or whatever it might be) was washed from around the columns or a siesmic event left the columns standing but took most of the ocean floor with it? I don't know. It would rock if it was human made but I just do see how it could be. I wonder how tall the Pyramids are...


well.. (2)

macdaddy (38372) | more than 13 years ago | (#90608)

..after reading the rest of the article I see now that they did actually talking about volcanic possibilities so it looks like my observations aren't unique. Oh well. Maybe next time.


Re:Fairly meaningless (1)

da_monumental_1 (39079) | more than 13 years ago | (#90609)

They have found Noah's Ark... the Turkish government won't let anyone go there

Well, of course it was to the west. (5)

devphil (51341) | more than 13 years ago | (#90610)

In fact, every sea-going european race extant at or a bit before plato's time talks about land to the far west of europe....

...because they knew from first-hand experience that going to the land to the east meant you got killed by migrating Mongols, going to the lands in the south meant you got killed by expanding Greeks, Romans, Persians, or Africans, and going to the lands in the north meant you froze to death or drowned. "Hey, there's nothing to the west that we can see; it's gotta be better than what we know right now, let's invent legends about it."

Okay, so I would've made a lousy anthropologist. :-)

Re:Misinformation Capitalizing on the Atlantis Mov (1)

colmore (56499) | more than 13 years ago | (#90611)

ahhh yes M:TG, stopped playing after they fucked up 4th edition... that was back in '96, what's been going on since then?

Eh? (2)

Shadowcaster (58728) | more than 13 years ago | (#90612)

Are these pillars anything like the "discovery" of that lost city which so conveniently resurfaced (the discovery, not the city ;) at around the same time as that "Atlantis" movie?

Speaking of that movie, am I the only one that gets irritated by the McDonald's commercial? "I speak Atlantian".. Not after I hit her in the face with a brick. ;)

Re:As much as I'd like to believe it... (1)

Chasuk (62477) | more than 13 years ago | (#90614)

It isn't even implied that the towers were human-constructed, if you take the time to read the article...

Those aren't lost towers (3)

joq (63625) | more than 13 years ago | (#90615)

Jimmy Hoffa is buried in dem things der tuff guy

It figures (2)

Webmoth (75878) | more than 13 years ago | (#90617)

So the pillars of society in Atlantis are venting.

What else is new?

Re:Eh? (1)

ForceOfWill (79529) | more than 13 years ago | (#90618)

What does the language spoken by people in Atlanta have to do with fast food?

found huge towers of stone (1)

onShore_Jake (80260) | more than 13 years ago | (#90619)

Scientists scouring the Atlantic Ocean have found huge towers of stone

Sonofa! Thats were I left those things.
I really gotta stop drinking those salt water martinis

Coast to Coast AM (1)

CaptainCarrot (84625) | more than 13 years ago | (#90621)

I wonder what Art Bell [] will make of this?

7 months after the fact!!! (1)

ddavid (88591) | more than 13 years ago | (#90623)

As noted Dec 12,2000:

Re:7 months after the fact!!!-Sorry, better link (1)

ddavid (88591) | more than 13 years ago | (#90624)

Re:Underground geysers? (1)

Guyote (95153) | more than 13 years ago | (#90626)

The article on Yahoo mentioned that the a component source of heat that drives the chemical reations that occur that produce these pillers is thought to be from an exothermic reation from a rather rare rock called olivine that was found in close proximity to hydrotheric vents; the chemical reagents involved make a lighter-colored build-up than the normal precipitation of minerals and chemicals found in other hydrothermal vents so far.

Re:Tabloid Slashdot? (2)

Guyote (95153) | more than 13 years ago | (#90627)

True. But people that have followed the discovery of oceanic ridges, tetonic plates, and the hydrothermal vents with their odd life-forms that have been in the common press off and on for the last twenty odd years would NOT have assumed right off that this was mention of the discovery of the city of Alantis....

Anime Rip Off (4)

zpengo (99887) | more than 13 years ago | (#90632)

CNN and Yahoo! just ripped off [] that story from some Japanese anime.

Geez, how many times is this story going to be posted?

Re:Cthulu (2)

MrBlack (104657) | more than 13 years ago | (#90635)

True about the pacific, I was thinking more of the proported cyclopean size of the structures in Ry'leh when I made the reference.

Cthulu (4)

MrBlack (104657) | more than 13 years ago | (#90636)

could this be the famous city Ry'leh where Cthulu lies dreaming?

Re:Um... (2)

Dr_Cheeks (110261) | more than 13 years ago | (#90637)

The Gulf Stream and the prevailing winds both flow/blow East. Sure, you might end up landing in Africa instead of Ireland, but if you've just sailed across the Atlantic, following the coastline North shouldn't be too intimidating.

Re:Atlanta (1)

Satai (111172) | more than 13 years ago | (#90638)

I always thought the parody of Donovan's "Atlantis" was a bit ... not-targeted at the right audience in that episode. But, then again, it was damn funny.

Skeptic (1)

Satai (111172) | more than 13 years ago | (#90639)

Skeptic Magazine [] has a "Skeptic Jr." section this [quarter/month] devoted to Atlantis. It's targeted at younger kids, but it's still a good read.

The part I liked the most was the summary of the Internet's views on Atlantis... about the blue-blooded mermaids and so on.

Re:Eh? (1)

leonbev (111395) | more than 13 years ago | (#90640)

Well, OF COURSE she can speak Atlantian! We all know how what linguistic geniuses McDonalds drive-thru cashiers can be! I'll bet that she can say "Do you want to super-size that combo?" in at least 12 languages, and yet still make sure that you can't understand a damned word that she's saying over the drive-thru speakers...

note (2)

Khopesh (112447) | more than 13 years ago | (#90641)

this is not about a civilization.

the phrase "lost city" seems more interesting than this oceanographic discovery of the decade.

More info about Archaea (3)

khym (117618) | more than 13 years ago | (#90643)

The archaea (or archaebacteria) are an interesting group of organism. They look like bacteria, but are more closely related to plants and animals than to bacteria, even though they have the circular DNA of bacteria rather than the straight DNA of animals/plants. The can also survive in a remarkable range of hostile environments. Two interesting pages on them are:

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose that you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

Re:Tabloid Slashdot? (1)

havardi (122062) | more than 13 years ago | (#90644)

yup i was pissed off about the same thing.. Sensationalism on Slashdot is starting to piss me off.. Robotic Baseball pitcher. BAH. Pillars underwater. BAH.. I hate you!

Re:Misinformation Capitalizing on the Atlantis Mov (2)

hrieke (126185) | more than 13 years ago | (#90646)

So that explains why I was in the theater!

Re:Fairly meaningless (1)

Traxton1 (154182) | more than 13 years ago | (#90651)

OK, I'm sure you've seen the new Atlantis movie, but I'm relatively positive than many of the other /.ers haven't, and simply care about science. The fact that there is the recent Disney movie is probably not related to the fact that scientists called it the lost city.

Re:Ah HA! (1)

Traxton1 (154182) | more than 13 years ago | (#90652)

Um, no it's not. Try reading the article before you post.

Re:come on (3)

Misch (158807) | more than 13 years ago | (#90654)

everyone should know this is just another disney promotion.

Well, of course it is. It was one of the top 3 stories [] on [] today. And, as many people know, ABCNews is owned by the Disney corporation.

Tabloid Slashdot? (5)

InfinityWpi (175421) | more than 13 years ago | (#90657)

You notice that the writeup doesn't mention these are naturally-occuring pillars? You make it sound like they're man-made Greek columns or something...

Did you say Hollywood (1)

ModelX (182441) | more than 13 years ago | (#90658)

"Science" news reporting that "accidentially" fits Hollywood movie schedules is getting way out of control.

Re:Um... (5)

shokk (187512) | more than 13 years ago | (#90659)

Formally, it is "The City Formerly Known As Lost", but they're having trouble coming up with one of those Prince symbols.

come on (2)

vectus (193351) | more than 13 years ago | (#90661)

everyone should know this is just another disney [] promotion.

watch, in a week, disney [] will come out with some new toys for McDonalds [] toys.

Re:Tabloid Slashdot? (1)

sulli (195030) | more than 13 years ago | (#90662)

Sensationalism on Slashdot is starting to piss me off..


Re:Um... (2)

MtViewGuy (197597) | more than 13 years ago | (#90663)

Actually, the ancients considered everything west over the Atlantic as literally the end of the world. It would be akin to us looking in the space.

It's small wonder why legends about superior people from the west of the Atlantic are so prevalent in European mythology.

Archaea != Animals (1)

PEdelman (200362) | more than 13 years ago | (#90664)

From the Yahoo! article:
Unusual life forms called Archaea have been found around traditional oceanic vent systems and these animals have been placed near the bottom of the evolutionary time scale. Scientists believe life around Lost City might be even more primitive.

"Archeae" is the name for the huge group of the first primitive bacteria, and have nothing to do with animals.

But can pc makers decide.. (1)

Pru (201238) | more than 13 years ago | (#90665)

But can PC makers decide what icons go on those pillars?

"Stone Pillers?" (1)

hastyg (204600) | more than 13 years ago | (#90666)

These are not "Stone Pillars", they are hydrothermal vents and have no relation to any type or form of human civilization. As far as being called "Lost City", that is pretty stupid since the are not related to a city in any way. Its like finding a rock in the middle of nowhere and claiming to have found a city. Please.

Re:In other news. (2)

micromoog (206608) | more than 13 years ago | (#90667)

i guess the mods thought it was silly for you to point out the obvious

Sensationalizism...Bad Yahoo? Bad! (2)

QwkHyenA (207573) | more than 13 years ago | (#90668)

Yahoo? intentionally sensationalized the entire report. You have to read a few lines before you realize this isn't about finding part of Atlantis.

Read CNN's review of the information (which has a pic BTW) for a better understanding of what the discovery is really about (hydrothermal vent communities...Specifically..A whole new type!!)

Yahoo?, Why didn't you just stick to search engines??

That was news (2)

biltmore (211368) | more than 13 years ago | (#90669)

..........a few months ago.
Nice of Yahoo and CNN to finally pick it up. March2001/marNews2001.htm

web and shell hosting plus more

Re:Cthulu (1)

Kierthos (225954) | more than 13 years ago | (#90671)

Nah, that is supposed to be in the Pacific... and it's not supposed to look natural, much the opposite (wierd non-Euclidean geometry that always looks odd to human eyes no mattor how you look at it).


Underground geysers? (3)

Traicovn (226034) | more than 13 years ago | (#90672)

"It's a brand new kind of hydrothermal system,"

Actually, it's probably been happening for hundreds of thousands of years....

The pictures are kind of neat though, and it's alway interesting to see what kinds of new life have turned up here on earth. (they mentioned they had reccently found some one-celled organisms living near the vents) It's hard to imagine sometimes, that even with all the technology like satellite imaging looking down on the earth, there are still places that are mysteries.

Looking at the description, they sound kinda like underwater hotsprings or geysers (like the ones out in Yellowstone) and they build a kind of dome or tower because of a build up of the minerals that are expunged from the opening. One would think that these would be larger and hotter being closer to earth's core, but apparently that's not the case.

[Something witty and intelligent should have appeared here.]

Maybe, Just Maybe... (1)

Johnny Starrock (227040) | more than 13 years ago | (#90673)

Maybe they were put there by Disney as a marketing ploy...

This is not new (1)

eclectro (227083) | more than 13 years ago | (#90674)

Heck, I remember playing with magic rocks [] when I was a kid.

Re:Eh? (1)

dmatos (232892) | more than 13 years ago | (#90678)

Not so much irritated, as enraged. Never before has one commercial elicited so many profanities from me. I would rather watch N'Stink videos than that commercial. In fact, that's what I often do. I change channels as soon as it comes on.

The worst part is that I can't place my finger on what exactly it is that annoys me so much. It's kind of like Barney in that manner...

Disney Propaganda (1)

TroyFoley (238708) | more than 13 years ago | (#90680)

After reading it, I thought, "Oh my." Then when hearing they were naturally occuring, I thought, "Wonder how much Disney shelled out to delay the release of this information."


TroyFoley (238708) | more than 13 years ago | (#90681)

All your base are belong to us.

Re:Um... (1)

iamblades (238964) | more than 13 years ago | (#90682)

In my opinion, the southern part of cuba(has been under water since the end of the last drastic glacier recession) is where atlantis may have been. Supposedly there are underwater plains on the south of cuba, and during the last ice age it would have been the perfect place to grow crops. This would also give a reason as to why the great flood stories are so prevalent in many cultures.

Re:Later that afternoon, (1)

Squiffy (242681) | more than 13 years ago | (#90683)


Chemical reaction (1)

Kooshman (248753) | more than 13 years ago | (#90684)

Does anybody here know the specifics of the reaction? All the article says is that the seawater reacts with "unstable mantle rocks," and that it occurs with much cooler eruptions. Does anybody with some real arcane chemistry knowlege care to enlighten us? I want some serious scientific coolness and basically the info just says 'it happens.'

Re:Whoa. Revelation! (1)

daniel_isaacs (249732) | more than 13 years ago | (#90685)

Hey, some guys like fat chicks, some guys get a thrill out of rebooting servers.

- Dan, NT Admin.

Misinformation Capitalizing on the Atlantis Movie? (3)

bahtama (252146) | more than 13 years ago | (#90686)

I can see the gleam in the eye of these researchers. Announce the existance of these towers when everyone just saw Atlantis the movie. What the headline fails to mention is that they are natural towers, not man-made. I was a little disappointed when I read the article, I was hoping for proof that I am the reincarnation of the high king of Atlantis, but I guess the proof will have to wait.


Found it (1)

glrotate (300695) | more than 13 years ago | (#90691) ba+national+geographic+gold&hl=en

Atlantis was found a few weeks ago (2)

glrotate (300695) | more than 13 years ago | (#90692)

It was at reasure_dc_1.html

Researchers found it off of the coast of cuba while looking for sunken treasure. National Geographic plans an expedition. Art Bell covered it fairly well when it happened.

Hopefully someone will be able to find the link.

Great! (3)

ez76 (322080) | more than 13 years ago | (#90700)

Now we just need to find the Perspex Pillar and the Golden Bail of Prosperity and the Wikkit Gate shall be restored!

Atlanta (3)

Yorrike (322502) | more than 13 years ago | (#90701)

It's the lost city of Atlanta.

Just be thankful that Ted Turner, Jane Fonda, that guy who invented Coke, and a magician got out before it sank.


Nobody ever lost it, though. (1)

Flying Headless Goku (411378) | more than 13 years ago | (#90703)

It's a natural formation, recently discovered.

Um... (5)

Flying Headless Goku (411378) | more than 13 years ago | (#90704)

Wouldn't it make more sense to call it "The Found City?"

It's a bit pessimistic to start right off assuming we're going to lose it.

Re:Um... (3)

Boiling_point_ (443831) | more than 13 years ago | (#90705)

In fact, every sea-going european race extant at or a bit before plato's time talks about land to the far west of europe....

Well, doesn't that make perfect sense, since they could (and did) strut about all over the land to the South, East and North? I mean, where else was there to put a mythical land, other than West?

Re:Um... (1)

Tuonenkielo (444651) | more than 13 years ago | (#90706)

Hmm... I wonder what the English think of you turning Gulf stream to flow in reverse... A whole lot of people're going to complain, especially in Scotland, now that they don't have temperate weather anymore...

Re:They aren't towers of stone. (2)

6EQUJ5 (446008) | more than 13 years ago | (#90707)

Yeah sure, and that's not a penis [] on the Little Mermaid promo poster... you work for Disney, don't you!

Atlantis is in Mediterranean(sp?) (1)

sgups (449689) | more than 13 years ago | (#90708)

Long ago I watched a program on TLC which talked about the search fro Atlantis. Accrding to the show and some evidence they found, they think Atlantis was around Malta or somewhere in the straight of Gibraltar. I dont exactly remember:(


idonotexist (450877) | more than 13 years ago | (#90709)

Intercept: 1142152 Channel: 59876
Subject: Re: DP Base Control
Date: 01:05:58 7/11/2001 UTC
Summary: Original message affirmed. All base return to base 70. Activate Bermuda Triangle immediately. Over.
To Deep Piller 69

From Home Base

All communicate here. They have base 68. Soon. Confirm. Reactive base 70 immediately. Bermuda Triangle, overrun by newcomers years ago, is now clear. No nnc or cnn located in area surrounding base 70. Full identification of dot slash dot or dot slash dot required. Move to 70 confirmed.

Ah HA! (1)

gooberguy (453295) | more than 13 years ago | (#90711)

I knew the disney movie was true!

D/\ Gooberguy

Re:Atlanta (1)

Nathdot (465087) | more than 13 years ago | (#90712)

I thought it said the "Lost City of ALANIS"

If that was the case, then I think it should best stay undersea

Fairly meaningless (1)

Heatseeker151 (465441) | more than 13 years ago | (#90713)

This reminds me a LOT of hearing about how they've pinpointed where Noah's Ark should be, but they still can't find it. Better still, it bears a closer similarity to finding microbial life on Mars and claiming we've found E.T.! Great. They've found underground volcanic pillars. If they build up for millions of years, they make islands. What's so earth shattering about that? Again, they're not claiming to have found Atlantis, but without a big Disney movie to get everyone's imagination stirring, this news clip wouldn't have shown up on anyone's radar.

Mircrosoft sue pillar for copyright (1)

q-soe (466472) | more than 13 years ago | (#90714)

Redmond Calif.
In a move which has stunned the computer industry Microsoft Corporations (NASDAQ:MSFT) has announced a lawsuit against the pillars found in the ocean floor recently.

Microsoft Public Relations Spokesperson OJ Simpson stated that the company has taken this action due to the possible confusion that the pillars make cause in the general worldwide marketplace.

"when most people think of monolithic objects which never move or change and with heads made of stone they naturally think of MIcrosoft" said mr Simpson "We dont want this to change. These pillars are obviously a blatant rip off or our corporate philosophy and must be stamped out".

Microsoft has asked the court to deliver a preliminary injunction preventing the pillars from doing anything 'pillar' like until a formal court hearing can be held.

In related new Microsoft announce the release of MS Pillar 2000, their latest product in the new MSGarden range of computer themed garden accesories, this joins the upcoming MSLawn and MSLawnmower as part of the new push into non computer related markets for microsoft.

Microsoft says that it sees its move into other areas of consumer life as an exciting opportunity to develop new fields of business "just think what we can do when we have a monopoly in garden products and home appliances" cackled Public Relations Spokesman OJ Simpson "Today the garden toomorrow the world"

Microsoft Shares close 59c higher on the announcement.

Open Source pundits have announced that they are working on a GPL version of both MSPillar and MSLawn at the moment and will shortly be releasing their beta version of MSLawnmower (called Scissors).

When asked for comment on the microsoft actions Apple CEO Steve Jobs praised Bill Gates and Microsoft whilst nervoucly looking around and mumbling something about 'deals with Satan' under his breath

Late Breaking News (1)

q-soe (466472) | more than 13 years ago | (#90715)

Scientists Discover Women

'Its what we've been waiting for' cry physicists.
Hot on the heels of their discovery of the Mysterious Slashdot Pillars in the oceans it has been announced that in an astounding move scientists have published the discovery of what they have called women.

'We had always heard about these mysterious females but none of us had ever encoutered one in real life' said Astro Physicist Ned Funders 'we just never get invited to those sort of parties'

The dicovery - announced in Nature Magazine under the headline 'Hot Chicks and How to get them' hasd sent shockwaves throughout the scientific world with reports that scientists have been abandoning their posts at universities around the world and flocking to locations where women are reputed to be found.

These locations include Shopping Malls, Strip Bars and Singles Clubs. We found and interviewed one scientist in a hooters restaurant who would not be named but can be described as wearing thick glasses and a polyester suit and tie in a fetching shade of mauve - when asked about his impression of women he stated 'i always knew they existed - others didnt believe me but i was right - now if only i could get them to talk to me'

Scientists are believed to be working on their next discovery at this very moment - the elusive and rare element entitled sex appeal. It is hoped that this will enable them to further explore the possibilities of women.

No pillars were harmed in the making of this story.

(i know this might be off topic but i figured so many other posts are that it may be worth a laugh)

Re:Slashdot has gone to hell (1)

q-soe (466472) | more than 13 years ago | (#90716)

We all need a laugh every now and then - you cannot take life to seriously and this story just cries out for a bit of it, besides a good laugh makes your day go faster and happier

Re:Late Breaking News (1)

q-soe (466472) | more than 13 years ago | (#90717)

umm i didnt know i was but of course i might have heard of it or read it years ago - i dont remember but that doesnt mean i didnt Pray tell what source i am ripping off ?

Large Monoliths (1)

Ramen Weasel (467030) | more than 13 years ago | (#90718)

Ever noticed this obsession? If someone found a bunch of coral reefs, no one on slashdot would care. But one damn phallic symbol and you cockmongers jump all over it. Damn.
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