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Dick Cheney Had Implanted Defibrillator Altered To Prevent Terrorist Attack

Soulskill posted about 9 months ago | from the didn't-want-to-wake-up-his-heart-by-accident dept.

Medicine 242

An anonymous reader writes "According to the Washington Post, 'Former Vice President Dick Cheney says he once feared that terrorists could use the electrical device that had been implanted near his heart to kill him and had his doctor disable its wireless function. Cheney has a history of heart trouble, suffering the first of five heart attacks at age 37. ... In an interview with CBS' 60 Minutes, Cheney says doctors replaced an implanted defibrillator near his heart in 2007. The device can detect irregular heartbeats and control them with electrical jolts. Cheney says that he and his doctor, cardiologist Jonathan Reiner, turned off the device's wireless function in case a terrorist tried to send his heart a fatal shock.' More at CBS News."

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242 comments

Evil, powerful men have enemies. (0)

Joining Yet Again (2992179) | about 9 months ago | (#45174319)

Sometimes take extra precautions!

News at 11.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (5, Insightful)

houstonbofh (602064) | about 9 months ago | (#45174363)

Frankly, anyone who understands how insecure wireless is should be terrified of having a built in personal "off switch." I would do the same thing, and so would a lot of slashdot.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (5, Insightful)

Joining Yet Again (2992179) | about 9 months ago | (#45174387)

Frankly, anyone who understands how fragile the human body is should be terrified of walking outdoors, etc.

Murders don't happen all the time simply because most people aren't psychopathic cunts. But, in Cheney's case, it takes one to know one.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (2, Interesting)

mellon (7048) | about 9 months ago | (#45174437)

Yeah, I think we have a pretty clear case of projection here. If a terrorist got close enough to him to hack his pacemaker, why not just stab him?

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (2)

sumdumass (711423) | about 9 months ago | (#45174535)

How close would a terrorist have to be? I mean antennas are great and you can hide them in other devices or out in the open and relay your cracking from a distance. That's the advantage of wireless isn't it.

Imagine a scenario where a terrorist gets a hotel room in the same hotel he is staying at. Would the security detail turn off the house WIFI so I couldn't access his pace maker from the hotel's WIFI in my room or the lobby or something? What if he visits a company that has wifi and I have a remote connection into the building?

perhaps we just aren't there yet, perhaps we already are.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/singularity/2012/12/06/yes-you-can-hack-a-pacemaker-and-other-medical-devices-too/ [forbes.com]

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (5, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174711)

IIRC the pacemakers have to be put in wireless configuration mode with a magnet placed in a specific spot on the pacemaker, so to hack one wirelessly would require physical access to him. It's not WIFI it's just wireless to prevent having to open him up to access the pacemaker, it still requires physical access.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (4, Informative)

milkmage (795746) | about 9 months ago | (#45175077)

if his pacemaker is anything like the one my fried has, you basically have to touch his chest with another gizmo to see it.

so wireless in the sense that there are no wires sticking out of his nipple... not AQ can kill him from an internet cafe in Pakistan.

what's Cheney's IP? /duh.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (2, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174629)

Correct. Pacemakers don't use wireless as in WiFi or Bluetooth. They use near field communications. It'd require a humongous coil to access it from more than a few inches.

Re: Evil, powerful men have enemies. (3, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174833)

No. As a previous poster mentioned, the device has to be in very close proximity initially. However, in most ICD models once the heart device has been paired with whatever device is on the outside, communication can happen over a bit longer distances ( a few meters or so). Remember that these devices have batteries - they don't need coils. I have one, and it communicates with a receiver in my home when I'm around, allowing my cardiologist to be alerted if something odd happens with my heart rythm.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (2)

GameboyRMH (1153867) | about 9 months ago | (#45174665)

Because it looks a lot more suspicious to drive a knife into someone's heart, than to press a button on your bluetooth headset which launches the attack code on your phone...

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174477)

...most people aren't psychopathic cunts. But, in Cheney's case, it takes one to know one.

But you claim to recognize Dick Cheney as one. Apparently that means you are a ....

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (5, Funny)

Joining Yet Again (2992179) | about 9 months ago | (#45174607)

Ah, but I'm a non-practising psychopathic cunt.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (1)

mrbester (200927) | about 9 months ago | (#45174771)

The term you're looking for is "lapsed"

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174885)

He obviously isn't an amateur. I think in his case the proper term would be "prolapsed [wikipedia.org] ". Oddly appropriate in his case.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174781)

"Non-practicing"? You have no need to practice? So you've perfected your technique then?

Enough with your boasting! You.. you... [slashdot.org]

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45175069)

That is quite clever of you! I couldn't have thought of that.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45175095)

But you claim to recognize Dick Cheney as one. Apparently that means you are a ....

So in your case it means it takes one to know two.
Wait a minute...

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (1)

Austrian Anarchy (3010653) | about 9 months ago | (#45174513)

Frankly, anyone who understands how insecure wireless is should be terrified of having a built in personal "off switch." I would do the same thing, and so would a lot of slashdot.

I thought there was a story or two right here within the past year about this very vulnerability.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174641)

Who cares if wireless is insecure? You can fix it in the layer above. The device should drop packets that are not digitally signed by patient's doctor.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (4, Insightful)

Dunbal (464142) | about 9 months ago | (#45174921)

I have a pacemaker/defibrillator, and I really couldn't give a shit. Besides, my tech says that my model requires a magnetic field in order to pull a magnet inside the device and make a contact so that the wifi is turned on. Without someone sticking that round thing on my chest, no one can talk to the machine. Honestly if strange people go around putting heavy chunks of metal on my chest without my permission I think wifi is the least of my worries.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45175109)

What if they leaned against you in a packed lift/subway train? Could have someone else flip the kill switch.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (5, Insightful)

ShanghaiBill (739463) | about 9 months ago | (#45174495)

By attacking America on 9/11, Al Qaeda hoped to lure America into a foolish overreaction that would alienate the West from the Islamic world, weaken America's will, and help spread Al Qaeda's message of extremism and violence. Few people helped them achieve these goals more than Dick Cheney did. So why would they want to kill him?

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (1)

ColdWetDog (752185) | about 9 months ago | (#45174539)

Which 'they'?

Cheney has managed to make quite a number of enemies over the years. No all of them live in the Middle East.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174621)

By attacking America on 9/11, Al Qaeda hoped to lure America into a foolish overreaction that would alienate the West from the Islamic world, weaken America's will, and help spread Al Qaeda's message of extremism and violence.

Nah. Just like a lot of groups they seem to need a scapegoat to blame for their problems and the United States is that scapegoat. Bin Laden basically said that we're evil and responsible for all these problems, etc, and Bill Clinton had his cigar smoked in the oval office and that makes the whole country bad, blah, blah, blah.

And there's at least one Imam that has suggested that the US's overreaction is proof that God disapproves of what Al Qaeda has done.

Re:Evil, powerful men have enemies. (5, Funny)

nbauman (624611) | about 9 months ago | (#45174627)

By attacking America on 9/11, Al Qaeda hoped to lure America into a foolish overreaction that would alienate the West from the Islamic world, weaken America's will, and help spread Al Qaeda's message of extremism and violence.

Good thing we're too smart to fall for that.

Terrorist? (2, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174343)

How can anyone who kills Dick Cheney be a terrorist?

Re:Terrorist? (1)

bill_mcgonigle (4333) | about 9 months ago | (#45174357)

It's Dick Cheney - that person paying for a pack of gum with pennies is a terrorist.

Re:Terrorist? (4, Insightful)

Joining Yet Again (2992179) | about 9 months ago | (#45174361)

Terror is a strategy, not a value judgment.

Don't let the propagandists redefine words to suit their purposes.

I'd much rather be terrorised from time to time - indeed, England was for quite a while, and my father almost got killed in one bomb blast - than be aerial bombarded back to the Middle Ages.

Re:Terrorist? (4, Insightful)

couchslug (175151) | about 9 months ago | (#45174709)

Precisely. There is only "war" of different kinds and at varying levels.

"Terror" is pretty effective though. Nations which lose hundreds of thousands of dead and maimed to socially acceptable causes (smoking, obesity, auto crashes) can easily be terrified into implementing structurally toxic changes by the trivial loss of a few thousand killed in one small location. I wouldn't want to be under a massive bombardment either, but once upon a time nations knew they could take massive casualties yet not only survive but triumph.

Give the Mamayev Kurgan monument some thought. Stalingrad cost more Soviet dead than the US lost in all its wars, but they refused to lose. Commies or not, they had balls.

Re:Terrorist? (3, Insightful)

Skiron (735617) | about 9 months ago | (#45175021)

Stalingrad cost more Soviet dead than the US lost in all its wars, but they refused to lose. Commies or not, they had balls.

Well, in essence, it was Hitler's fault. The original plan was to take the Ural oil fields and the German machine was unstoppable it doing it - until Hitler decided on a detour to take Stalingrad on the way (he thought it would destroy the Russian hearts and resistance) ~ bad move.

If he didn't do the detour, I think the outcome of WWII would have been different.

Mind you, that doesn't take away what the people of Stalingrad did to resist and destroy the German eastern front.

Re:Terrorist? (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174839)

Very true. But, value judgements aside, the question still stands as assassinating one of the people most likely to be assassinated by a method that leaves no collateral damage and the vast majority would be completely immune to anyway is about the furthest any kind of homicide can possibly be from a terror strategy. Either he's assuming that nobody who isn't a also terrorist would want to do him in, he's simply using the word "terrorist" as a descriptor for all his enemies (except maybe political rivals, but who knows) regardless of their strategy.

Re:Terrorist? (3, Insightful)

Joining Yet Again (2992179) | about 9 months ago | (#45175163)

Agreed: such a targetted attack would only be "terrorism" when the word is redefined by propagandists.

Re:Terrorist? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174395)

It makes me happy to think he was afraid of that. Live in fear, yeah, just what he deserves. Watch out for that microwave oven!!

Re:Terrorist? (1)

Opportunist (166417) | about 9 months ago | (#45174683)

I'd be too if his fear to be killed didn't result in the lot of us having to live with ridiculous limitations.

I'd say give the terrorists a fighting chance and leave us alone!

Re:Terrorist? (1)

mellon (7048) | about 9 months ago | (#45174425)

A->B != B->A. Just because someone kills Dick Cheney doesn't mean they are not a terrorist.

Re:Terrorist? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174521)

Anyone that killed Hitler would've been considered a hero. Isn't this the same thing?

-- green led

Re: Terrorist? (1)

tysonedwards (969693) | about 9 months ago | (#45174577)

To Germany, might the assassination of their leader not be an act that causes some of their population to feel terror?

Re: Terrorist? (1)

Joining Yet Again (2992179) | about 9 months ago | (#45174673)

Indeed. Mandela's an even greyer area: many South African whites really did fear the black majority - indeed, they worried about being treated not unlike Mugabe has treated white farmers, and then some - so they ended up oppressing (with some terroristic behaviour) the blacks. Mandela responded with an ANC which wasn't wholly opposed to similarly violent action. Locked up for a few decades, the wise old man realises that, while the racist policy was obviously wrong, everyone ended up engaging in nastiness to protect what they perceived as their threatened interests - the only way forward was to accept sincere apologies.

Re: Terrorist? (2)

Skiron (735617) | about 9 months ago | (#45175065)

Did you know Mugabe spelt backwards is: 'E, Ba Gum' frequently heard in the North of England

Re:Terrorist? (1)

geirlk (171706) | about 9 months ago | (#45174589)

Eva Braun might disagree.

Re:Terrorist? (1)

Opportunist (166417) | about 9 months ago | (#45174697)

Actually, no. The probably WORST thing that could have happened during WW2 was that Hitler got assassinated before the end of the war. We'd have had to relive the legend of WW1, that Germany wasn't beaten but just betrayed, the stab-in-the-back myth [wikipedia.org] would just have gotten a new theme: "If it hadn't been for that assassin, the Führer could certainly have turned the tide of the battle with his genius".

And the whole crap would have continued a few years later again.

Breaking News (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174367)

Breaking News : Dick Cheney has a heart !

Re:Breaking News (1)

mellon (7048) | about 9 months ago | (#45174445)

Yes, but it's broken. That's what turned Darth Vader evil too.

He's got the heart of an 18 year-old! (2)

Ihlosi (895663) | about 9 months ago | (#45174511)

He keeps it in a jar on his desk.

Re:Breaking News (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174635)

It was a Wizard of Oz administration. Guess who the Scarecrow is.

Re:Breaking News (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45175071)

Well played, sir!

So, like, don't start wars you shouldn't, M;K? (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174371)

Didn't you and your cronies have enough money already? Was it worth killing (our) 5510 Americans just to get richer?

First thing that came to mind.... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174373)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4BOQI-LAEzM

homeland (0)

etash (1907284) | about 9 months ago | (#45174397)

comes to mind with the vice president's ( the "walking dude" aka randall flagg actor from stephen king's "the stand" ) murder in the same way.

Extra Extra! (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174407)

Extra Extra!
Read all about it!
Dick Cheney revealed to have a heart!
Progressives outraged over use of resources!

Yeah, I guess that seems like a sensible move... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174419)

What else are we supposed to say here, other than "yeah, if I were basically running a country with lots of enemies, I would also not allow wireless access to my pacemaker"?

What does he need the defibrillator for? (1)

jopet (538074) | about 9 months ago | (#45174449)

Since, clearly, he does not have a heart.

Dick Cheney's got a heart? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174451)

Citation needed.

But in everyone else (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174455)

But in everyone else it's turned on? If it's an acknowledged attack vector, then why?

Re:But in everyone else (1)

GameboyRMH (1153867) | about 9 months ago | (#45174687)

The same reason all acknowledged attack vectors are left open: Convenience and carelessness.

NCIS episode inspiration? (1)

DreamMaster (175517) | about 9 months ago | (#45174467)

Hmm.. I wonder if this wasn't the inspiration of the previous season's NCIS episode "Need to Know" where the victim was killed in exactly that manner.

Dick? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174471)

don't people in USA use it as slang for a male body part? lol ok, I'm immature. i haven't heard that name before. sorry. mods, you can hide this comment if you want :p

Re:Dick? (1)

Barefoot Monkey (1657313) | about 9 months ago | (#45174907)

It's a common nickname for "Richard", and predates the slang by quite a bit. In fact, the whole reason "dick" is used to refer to a boy-part is because it is such a common and well-established boy-name. The names "Willie" and "Fanny" came to be used for "penis" and "vagina" for the exact same reason (although the latter is used slightly differently in the US).

Re:Dick? (1)

Tokolosh (1256448) | about 9 months ago | (#45174977)

Any Cockney will tell you a "Richard" is something else entirely.

Re:Dick? (1)

Skiron (735617) | about 9 months ago | (#45175117)

I don't think it's specific to cockney, just generic rhyming slang in England. It's all gone 'Pete Tong', I'm going for a 'Ruby {Murray}' type thing.

Paranoid? Nope, he's merely one noid. (3, Insightful)

waddgodd (34934) | about 9 months ago | (#45174473)

Okay, given Cheney's historical level of paranoia (this is nothing compared to some of his hijinks as SECNAV), I can TOTALLY see Cheney not understanding something and therefore assuming it's going to be used by people out to get him. Both "not understanding something" and "worried about trivial crap" are WELL within Cheney's persona. Having said that, whose wise idea was it to make a defibrilator that can be remotely accessed wirelessly in the first place? If nerd history has taught us anything, it's vulnerable shit eventually gets broken into, and wireless protocols are by definition vulnerable.

Re:Paranoid? Nope, he's merely one noid. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174647)

Well, you often need to tweak the settings or download logs. You really wouldnt want to have your skin cut open every time for that, right? Besides, it's wireless as in near field communications. You need to be really, really close. Inches away.

Re:Paranoid? Nope, he's merely one noid. (3, Insightful)

Ihlosi (895663) | about 9 months ago | (#45174933)

Having said that, whose wise idea was it to make a defibrilator that can be remotely accessed wirelessly in the first place?

Probably someone who thought that sticking a cable through your chest to change the things configuration is an even worse idea.

skr1pt k1dd13 h4x0rs is a real risk (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174483)

It is not paranoia when even a script kiddie would want to kill you, half the world would like it, and you have a Industry-Standard-Security-Class device that keeps you alive.

He'd be dead already, someone would have flooded the black market with a "pacemaker-be-gone" device akin to the tv-be-gone ones already.

It's a weird experience (5, Interesting)

BenEnglishAtHome (449670) | about 9 months ago | (#45174499)

My sis has an implanted defibrillator. It's a weird experience to be sitting in a doctors office when a technician comes in with a machine to test the installation.

"I just need to turn up your blood pressure and heart rate for a minute" says the tech, as casually as ordering a cup of coffee.

A couple of button presses later, the look of shock on my sister's face as she realized that she was not, in a very literal sense, in control of her own heart is something I'll never forget.

She needs her implanted defibrillator but, holy shit, the power she must cede to Miss Random Device Technician by having it in her body is scary as all hell.

Re:It's a weird experience (3, Insightful)

ColdWetDog (752185) | about 9 months ago | (#45174569)

Do you crinkle in fear each time a car comes at you from the opposite direction? Every time you get on a plane?

Lots of potentially dangerous actions in your life, many other people can terminate it accidentally or on purpose. Hell, that dodgy iPhone charger you bought off of eBay - do you really trust it?

Re:It's a weird experience (3, Insightful)

mysidia (191772) | about 9 months ago | (#45174787)

Do you crinkle in fear each time a car comes at you from the opposite direction? Every time you get on a plane?

Lots of potentially dangerous actions in your life, many other people can terminate it accidentally or on purpose.

At least if a car going the opposite direction crashes into you, or the airplane pilot crashes the plane their life and property is in serious jeapordy as well.

Re:It's a weird experience (3, Interesting)

BenEnglishAtHome (449670) | about 9 months ago | (#45174945)

I was being specific, not general. Here's what I mean -

Do you crinkle in fear each time a car comes at you from the opposite direction?

I'm sure I was quite afraid the first time I drove. However, I quickly learned that the danger was minimal, there were postive steps I could take to minimize it, and if something did go horribly wrong there was only a vanishingly small chance that someone was deliberately causing a problem. I got used to it, obviously, since they don't bother me now. I don't remember exactly, but I feel sure I actually got used to it before I finished my first drive.

I understand that all of life is potentially dangerous. That was not my point.

Prior to the implanted defibrillator, my sis had a pacemaker. It was just under the skin and checking it required placing an electronic puck of some sort directly on the skin over the pacemaker. That was how it was connected to a testing console. Making changes to the way it worked was a bit complicated, took some time, and required the cooperation of the patient (at minimum, to just sit there and let the work happen).

The defibrillator was very different. There was no puck and it could be accessed from a vastly greater distance. Also, the technician could instantly, with a few keystrokes, turn my sister's heart up or down whether my sister was cooperating or not. In my first post, I was relating that this was the first time we realized that the implanted defibrillator required her to trust her life to a technology that could be so easily abused. Now that she's gone through it, she accepts the risk.

However, it's a case of believing "I'm not a target/security through obscurity" that allows her to accept this situation. She really is completely defenseless against anyone close by who can send the right wireless signals. She accepts the risk in exchange for the rewards but the initial shock at realizing the risk existed (and having it so clearly, offhandedly demonstrated) was NOT unjustified. I feel sure that if she were a public person like Cheney, she, too, would have wanted wireless access disabled.

Empathy motherfucker; find some. (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174967)

Empathy motherfucker; find some.

Re:It's a weird experience (1)

rwyoder (759998) | about 9 months ago | (#45174951)

My sis has an implanted defibrillator. It's a weird experience to be sitting in a doctors office when a technician comes in with a machine to test the installation.

"I just need to turn up your blood pressure and heart rate for a minute" says the tech, as casually as ordering a cup of coffee.

A couple of button presses later, the look of shock on my sister's face as she realized that she was not, in a very literal sense, in control of her own heart is something I'll never forget.

She needs her implanted defibrillator but, holy shit, the power she must cede to Miss Random Device Technician by having it in her body is scary as all hell.

You are describing a *pacemaker*, not a defibrillator.

A defibrillator does nothing unless it detects the heart has gone into V-fib, then it applies a shock which momentarily stops the heart, enabling the heart to reset its self back to normal rhythm.

Pacemaker vs. defibrillator (2)

BenEnglishAtHome (449670) | about 9 months ago | (#45175055)

You are describing a *pacemaker*, not a defibrillator.

Not in this case.

My sister has an implanted cardiac defibrillator that also functions as a pacemaker. It was my understanding that all implanted defibrillators have this functionality.

Of course, I could be completely wrong about that. The defibrillator she has replaced a previous pacemaker that was just a pacemaker. We were not informed if there was actually such a thing as a defibrillator that was just a defibrillator because such a device would not have been appropriate for her. For that reason, I may have the wrong impression.

Suffice it to say, she has a combo device that is always referred to by medical professionals as an "ICD" without mentioning that it also functions as a pacemaker. I assume they all do. If not, I'm sure someone on here more knowledgable than me will correct me.

Re:Pacemaker vs. defibrillator (2)

rkww (675767) | about 9 months ago | (#45175135)

ICD = Implantable Cardioverter Defibrillator [bhf.org.uk]

Pacing - a series of low-voltage electrical impulses (paced beats) at a fast rate to try and correct the heart rhythm

Cardioversion - one or more small electric shocks to try and restore the heart to a normal rhythm

Defibrillation - one or more larger electric shocks to try and restore the heart to a normal rhythm

Re:It's a weird experience (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45175079)

You are describing a *pacemaker*, not a defibrillator.

A defibrillator does nothing unless it detects the heart has gone into V-fib, then it applies a shock which momentarily stops the heart, enabling the heart to reset its self back to normal rhythm.

Maybe the old ones. Most new ICD (implantable cardiac defibrillator) function as pacemakers also.

But did he... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174517)

It was smart of him to turn off the wireless. I don't think anyone can claim he is less than brilliant at whatever he does. The question that I'd like to know is if he had his bodyguards carry a dedicated detector that would alert if that particular signal was observed in his presence?

Dick Cheney says (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174533)

he once feared that terrorists could use the electrical device that had been implanted near his heart to kill him and had his doctor disable its wireless function.
Let me guess, he's American.

So that's why I couldn't get an ssh console. (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174581)

It turns out he is doing much better. It turns out that all he needed was the blood of a young boy. I believe the donor was Iraqi. Some weird O-Negative glycoprotein subtype.

PS This is a joke. Because I know THEY are watching.

Bad thing about advancements in medical technology (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174587)

The lifespans of these rich, elitist assholes are artificially prolonged.

Re:Bad thing about advancements in medical technol (1)

GameboyRMH (1153867) | about 9 months ago | (#45174735)

It's going to get worse too. I think the movie In Time gives a good idea of what would happen if life extension became trivially cheap and easy for anyone to have. "Life credits" would have to be used to cap-and-trade lifespans, and then guess what...

I hope all the companies working on life extension know what they're playing with.

Re:Bad thing about advancements in medical technol (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174867)

Yeah, we could suddenly all turn into homicidal maniacs who want to kill people who don't have enough life credits. Could happen. More likely we would limit everyone to 1 child (so 1 child per 2 people - a man and a woman). That way, no one has to be killed for running out of life credits, everyone can still have a child and a grand child and there will not be overpopulation. There will be no new people after log_2(n) generations. Since people still die from accidents, we'd in fact need to get people to have more than 1 child - people could have 1 child every t/2 years, where t is the average time for a person with a youthful body to get into a fatal situation (currently t is about 1000). Probably there would need to be even more children than that, since some people would not get all the children that they could. Everyone could also get 2 children, though then it would take much longer for the population to stabilize, since each generation would only get smaller by the amount of non-age-related deaths and the amount of people who opt not to have children. But yeah, homicidal maniacs, that's another route.

Re:Bad thing about advancements in medical technol (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45175053)

The lifespans of these rich, elitist assholes are artificially prolonged.

How terrible. Far better if the resources were used to artificially prolong the lifespan of some random, insignificant poor person instead. Perhaps some trailer dwelling ham-beast whose greatest contribution to humanity has been squeezing borderline retarded crotch droppings out of her greasy cooter would be a suitable beneficiary.

Re:Bad thing about advancements in medical technol (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45175133)

That person would still be 100 more times a worthy human being as Dick Cheney, or any CEO.

Known issue (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174601)

I work in this field. Three or four years ago when all the big device companies launched their remote interrogation capabilities, I asked around at the biggest industry conference (HRS) about device security. The answer (when it wasn't "security?") was "oh, you'd need a programmer" (the laptop-like devices used to interrogate implanted defibrillators and pacemakers). Walk down the right hall in a hospital with scrubs or a white coat on and grab one and you're set, not to mention reverse engineering. I hope they're improving the security with this kind of publicity.

Will not happen (2)

Nephrite (82592) | about 9 months ago | (#45174667)

Killing a politician with subtle electronic sabotage is not appealing to terrorists. It is not dramatic. It is quiet. Terrorists would rather blow a city block with TNT to kill a politician. Killing somebody using defibrillator suits spies or other government agents.

Re:Will not happen (3, Insightful)

mbone (558574) | about 9 months ago | (#45174793)

Killing a politician with subtle electronic sabotage is not appealing to terrorists. It is not dramatic. It is quiet. Terrorists would rather blow a city block with TNT to kill a politician. Killing somebody using defibrillator suits spies or other government agents.

And my guess is that that is what he was really worried about.

Re:Will not happen (1)

couchslug (175151) | about 9 months ago | (#45174845)

That was Old School terror designed to target proles who are the equivalent of Star Trek redshirts. It works, but the elites don't fear it and in the case of 9/11 even exploit it!

New School, like the brilliant whacking of Alfred Herrhausen by a precision explosive charge or US drone attacks, reaches out to specific high-value targets. For those specific targets the threat is real and coerces them to defend against it. Such attacks don't require an attacker be on the scene making them a logical way to go. Someone wanting to manipulate a pacemaker could put a remotely activated device in, for example, an ordinary looking large plastic electrical enclosure, attach it to a streetlamp or hide it any number of ways, then wait for the target to come in range. It could stay dormant for a long time, even years if power was tapped from a steady source.

Danger still there (3, Insightful)

naasking (94116) | about 9 months ago | (#45174733)

Disabling wifi doesn't remove the danger. Directed energy weapons, like RF guns, can still target and disrupt the device in various ways since it contains electronics.

Dick (0)

GrahamJ (241784) | about 9 months ago | (#45174741)

Finally, an aptly named politician.

Ripped from the headlines ... or the reverse! (3, Informative)

whoever57 (658626) | about 9 months ago | (#45174745)

Cheyney obviously watches Homeland, in which the Vice President is killed by remotely acessing his pacemaker.

Terrorists, ha! (1)

mbone (558574) | about 9 months ago | (#45174783)

Based on his history it seems more likely that he was worried that the "organs of state security," or even some of his corporate sponsors, might do this to him, to make sure that various secrets stayed, well, secret.

Obligatory... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174823)

He's more machine now, than man. His mind is twisted and evil...

Given the choice (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174881)

I would rather listen to an interview with Dick Cheney than Barack Obama any day of the week.

What a miserable piece of shit Cheney is. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174917)

Imagine living with such paranoia.

I remember Nixon had similar tendencies.

They both serve as good examples of how not to be.

Patriot == Terrorist In Cheney's Mind (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45175025)

Nixon thought they were too extreme when they worked for him.
QED.

Terrorist? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45174991)

That wouldn't be a terrorist. That would be a murderer.

The fact is.. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45175003)

The peacemaker was replaced with the new W.O.P.R. model

Please don't die!! (1)

WaffleMonster (969671) | about 9 months ago | (#45175045)

While I know this is far fetched I still hold out hope some day Cheney and friends will held to account for lying to his own people and the world to start a war and war crimes.

Perhaps by some unexpected political change or a fateful visit to the wrong country where that government has the balls to follow thru on perusing charges.

It also has to be meaningful if Cheney and pals only live for a year in jail and then die of old age it is far from an ideal situation.

Yeah but what about EMP? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 9 months ago | (#45175075)

How's he going to keep safe from an EMP shockwave?

New Heart Device Allows Cheney To Experience Love (4, Funny)

JThaddeus (531998) | about 9 months ago | (#45175081)

One of my favorite headlines fromThe Onion:
http://www.theonion.com/articles/new-heart-device-allows-cheney-to-experience-love,2294/

Wireless drivers? (1)

Skiron (735617) | about 9 months ago | (#45175139)

I wonder if the wireless thing ever turned on properly after he woke up?

Cheney's clueless, it's not that easy (4, Informative)

Chewbacon (797801) | about 9 months ago | (#45175159)

Classic case of the dumbasses we put in charge who go sticking their fingers in things they know absolutely nothing about. Cheney strikes me as a prepper and we need to keep dipshits like that out of office.

These devices have to be "woken up" with a sensor placed on the chest. Then it'll communicate with the interrogation equipment which can induces shocks via a defribillation test. The range is limited to about 15 feet. Despite the wireless option being turned off, anyone with the device used to interrogate can still induce a shock with the chest sensor.

Still, a shock could still be induced without the tech by causing artifact in the leads. Inappropriate shocks have been reported in people operating heavy equipment like jackhammers and chainsaws. So shake the shit out of him and he may get an inappropriate shock. Worst that would happen there is induction of ventricular fibrillation which would only cause an appropriate shock.

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