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Creating "Homo Minutus" — a Benchtop Human To Test Drugs

Unknown Lamer posted about 5 months ago | from the man-is-obsolete dept.

Medicine 49

Science_afficionado (932920) writes "Vanderbilt University scientists reported significant progress toward creating 'homo minutus' — a benchtop human — at the Society of Toxicology meeting on Mar. 26 in Phoenix. The advance is the successful development and analysis of a human liver construct//organ-on-a-chip that responds to exposure to a toxic chemical much like a real liver. The achievement is the first result from a five-year, $19 million multi-institutional effort led by Los Alamos National Laboratory (LANL), to develop four interconnected human organ constructs — liver, heart, lung and kidney — that are based on a highly miniaturized platform nicknamed ATHENA (Advanced Tissue-engineered Human Ectypal Network Analyzer). The project is supported by the Defense Threat Reduction Agency. Similar programs to create smaller-scale organs-on-chips are underway at the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency and the National Institutes of Health."

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49 comments

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Meh. (4, Funny)

fuzzyfuzzyfungus (1223518) | about 5 months ago | (#46628761)

I always just use orphans. Nobody seems to care about those.

Re:Meh. (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46628865)

Oh no!!!! God will not be happy with this!!! Pray for God's forgiveness! You damned scientists will all rot in hell!!!

Re:Meh. (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46629029)

Well, maybe if the church hadn't made it wrong to experiment on heathens, god would be happier.

Re:Meh. (1)

scorp1us (235526) | about 5 months ago | (#46629051)

You can't experiment on kids like that. They are too resilient and you won't get good data. It's not soud. Use midgets instead, ginger midgets.

Re:Meh. (1)

MickyTheIdiot (1032226) | about 5 months ago | (#46631767)

Ginger midgets aren't human. You fail it.

Re:Meh. (0)

Chung Chu (3584923) | about 5 months ago | (#46629535)

Homo Minutus .. Also known as "that little faggot" mau ban cong inox [thegioisatinox.vn]

Re:Meh. (1)

bitt3n (941736) | about 5 months ago | (#46630815)

I always just use orphans. Nobody seems to care about those.

The best part is, unlike breeding normal laboratory animals, all you need to make more orphans is a PTA meeting and an assault rifle.

Homo Minutus .. AKA (4, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46628771)

Homo Minutus .. Also known as "that little faggot"

Re:Homo Minutus .. AKA (2, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46629021)

Yeah, buddy, that's his own hair.

Re:Homo Minutus .. AKA (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46629271)

That little faggot's got his own jet airplane.

Re:Homo Minutus .. AKA (1)

MickyTheIdiot (1032226) | about 5 months ago | (#46631689)

We're pinheads now
We are not whole
We're pinheads all
Jocko homo

So much effort... (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46628779)

Why not just midgets?

Re:So much effort... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46628785)

Why not just midgets?

They are - midget homos.

Re:So much effort... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46631717)

There's a beautiful place waiting for him in the California pron industry.

Re:So much effort... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46629747)

Why not just midgets?

Competition from dwarf tossing.

Re:So much effort... (1)

hink (89192) | about 5 months ago | (#46630445)

Cause midget is an unacceptable term. My son has dwarfism, and shit like that pisses me off.

Re:So much effort... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46631611)

Does he look more like a christmas elf or a cookie elf?

Re:So much effort... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46631755)

I think both are wrong. I am guessing Kiebler.

Re:So much effort... (1)

Jmc23 (2353706) | about 5 months ago | (#46653995)

You have no problem with dwarfism? Why is midget unacceptable. I don't know about you, but a small fly sounds like a better comparison than a demonic spirit...

More info (4, Informative)

MRe_nl (306212) | about 5 months ago | (#46628789)

A homunculus is shaped from a mixture of clay, ashes, mandrake root, spring water, and one pint of the creatorâ(TM)s own blood. The materials cost 50 gp. The creatureâ(TM)s master may assemble the body or hire someone else to do the job.
After the body is sculpted, it is animated through an extended magical ritual that requires a specially prepared laboratory or workroom, similar to an alchemistâ(TM)s laboratory and costing 500 gp to establish. If the creator is personally constructing the creatureâ(TM)s body, the building and ritual can be performed together.

Rights (1)

ketomax (2859503) | about 5 months ago | (#46628815)

What about the fundamental rights of these organs?

Re:Rights (2, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46628919)

They have the right to remain silent.

Re:Rights (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46629569)

Anything they say can and will be taken down and used as data.

What about a joke ? (2)

vikingpower (768921) | about 5 months ago | (#46628817)

What with April 1st and so on... Anyways, tomorrow I will be in Prague, and will propose the job offer to the Golem. He's been jobless for centuries now.

Re:What about a joke ? (1)

McGruber (1417641) | about 5 months ago | (#46629115)

What with April 1st and so on...

Everyday is April Fool's Day with Slashdot Beta....

Re:What about a joke ? (1)

K. S. Kyosuke (729550) | about 5 months ago | (#46629183)

I'm pretty sure he'd be offended by the "minutus" part, so let's hope he doesn't understand Latin. Just don't piss him off in Hebrew and you should be fine.

Re:What about a joke ? (1)

vikingpower (768921) | about 5 months ago | (#46651577)

He was quite polite to me, pointing out that Oracle had already hired him to shovel Big Data. "My salary is a hype, but I am in for the spell and the hype only, anyways". After which we drank one of those excellent Czech beers and went our separate ways.

Re:What about a joke ? (1)

K. S. Kyosuke (729550) | about 5 months ago | (#46651939)

"He was quite polite to me, pointing out that Oracle had already hired him to shovel Big Data"

I'm pretty sure that's just a clever ploy:

1) Hire Golem,

2) Wait until the unstable Golem becomes enraged and destroys the neighboring IBM campus at Chodov,

3) Disclaim everything. :-)

Re:What about a joke ? (1)

vikingpower (768921) | about 5 months ago | (#46658295)

Hm. The Golem leaving the Prague ghetto and wreaking havoc at Chodov, which belongs to the administrative district of Karlovy Vary - that would be an historical first. The defenestration of tradition, so to say :-)

Re:What about a joke ? (1)

K. S. Kyosuke (729550) | about 5 months ago | (#46659751)

Huh? Now what do Karlovy Vary have to do with anything? That's like saying that Olympia is the capital of Washington, D.C. I suspect you actually haven't been to Prague, being blissfully unaware where Oracle is. You might even have lied about having met the Golem! Now I feel hurt.

Re:What about a joke ? (1)

vikingpower (768921) | about 5 months ago | (#46667627)

Misunderstanding. There is a Chodov that is a suburb of Karlovy Vary. I did not check that there is also a Chodov close to Prague. In fact, I am not in the least interested in Oracle. Sorry for your hurt feelings. Next time I go to Prague ( which is slightly over 3 hrs driving from here ), I'll bring you a hair from the Golem. Do you feel better now ?

Prank (0)

Redmancometh (2676319) | about 5 months ago | (#46628881)

Clearly an April fools' prank.

Re:Prank (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46630577)

Eh... I don't think it is. The articles cited are dated in March and it all looks very reasonable. They are not saying they are making whole humans, just growing organ systems to test toxic exposure.

Yeah, so? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46628917)

I thought the 3D printing revolution meant stuff like this is a snap and just a bittorrent away? Why even post stories like this anymore? Anything, anything at all is possible now.

This'll put my flatmate out of work (2)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46628935)

That's we he does. He gets all the time off he wants, new drugs to try out, and money for nothing really. Has anyone considered the harm this will do?

Re:This'll put my flatmate out of work (1)

Sockatume (732728) | about 5 months ago | (#46629505)

His job's probably safe; by all accounts this is going to be a superior alternative to animal and in-vitro studies. Given the simplicity of the model you'll still need to test drugs in actual people.

Re:This'll put my flatmate out of work (1)

mordjah (1088481) | about 5 months ago | (#46629787)

Not a bad gig, huh? He gets his money for nothin'.. Hell I bet he gets his chicks for free too!

yawn (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46629065)

fsck beta

What for? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46629087)

As long as there are enough rappers/hip hop fans that we can use, why bother?

Re:What for? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46629609)

Just say blacks, dude. You look even dumber when you try to hide it behind something else.

You didn't mention Prof. Folo Lirpa's contribution (1)

eeyore (78059) | about 5 months ago | (#46629341)

I understand Professor Folo Lirpa of the LMB Institute of Biology, Andorra, provided much of the early work on which the paper which you allude to in this article is based.

Your insensitive clod rating has been appropriately adjusted.

--
E 8-)

Ready for Christmas? (1)

FatLittleMonkey (1341387) | about 5 months ago | (#46629621)

Will they be selling consumer versions as pets?

Autoplaying bullshit? (1)

rebelwarlock (1319465) | about 5 months ago | (#46629755)

If you want to have a lame April Fool's joke, that's fine, but done have autoplaying beeping. There's no purpose for that, other than enticing people to track you down and beat you with a rusty pipe.

Anybody out there know morse? (1)

darkonc (47285) | about 5 months ago | (#46631369)

I'm presuming that the beeps are Morse code for some silly message, but I only know enough Morse to recognize it, not 'read' it.

Re:Autoplaying bullshit? (1)

MickyTheIdiot (1032226) | about 5 months ago | (#46631665)

Didn't recognize morse code? Turn in geek card.

Re:Autoplaying bullshit? (1)

rebelwarlock (1319465) | about 5 months ago | (#46636459)

Morse code is not an acceptable excuse to be an annoying asshole.

We already have Bench-top Humans! (1)

Irate Engineer (2814313) | about 5 months ago | (#46629791)

I believe they are called "monkeys".

"Homo Minutus" (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46631657)

That's what your girlfriend called you when we were together last night.

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