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This Chip Can Tell If You've Been Poisoned

Soulskill posted about 5 months ago | from the let-somebody-else-test-it-first dept.

Medicine 36

sciencehabit writes "When you are dealing with a deadly poison that can be found in food and is a potential terrorist weapon, you want the best detection tools you can get. Now, researchers in France have demonstrated an improved method to detect the most deadly variant of the botulinum neurotoxin, which causes botulism. Their test — essentially, a lab on a tiny chip (abstract) — provides results faster than the standard method and accurately detects even low concentrations of the toxin."

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But can it tell if I have been BAD? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46851579)

Santa may be interested.

Re:But can it tell if I have been BAD? (1)

K. S. Kyosuke (729550) | about 5 months ago | (#46851813)

Not necessary. These days, Santa can tell if you've been bad simply by analyzing your browsing habits using his Christmas server farm. It's more or less accurate enough for him.

Re:But can it tell if I have been BAD? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46852161)

Not necessary. These days, Santa can tell if you've been bad simply by analyzing your browsing habits using his Christmas server farm. It's more or less accurate enough for him.

Santa should be careful. Due to NSA leaks and concerns about the watchers, the watchers now have watchers.

And Jesus is watching you Santa. Don't try and deny it. 23 December 2013, 0445GMT...two elves and a double-headed candy cane ring a bell? Yeah, I thought so...

Re:But can it tell if I have been BAD? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 4 months ago | (#46957989)

K. S. Kyosuke: You've been called out (for tossing names) & you ran "forrest" from a fair challenge http://slashdot.org/comments.p... [slashdot.org]

What isn't a potential terrorist weapon? (2)

flyingfsck (986395) | about 5 months ago | (#46851839)

In California, even a spit ball can be a potential terrorist weapon...

Re: What isn't a potential terrorist weapon? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46851977)

And is known to the state of California to cause cancer

Considering the Republicans... (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46851645)

are poisoning people just as fast and as hard as they can, what the fuck good is this chip? More useful would be one that identifies those horrible people. They are fucking over the entire world. They think the world is too populated which is why their kind keeps murdering children. That is their way. The asswipes that run this site and created the new Beta version are Republicans. That is why it is so horrific. Fuck them and their attempts to murder us. FUCK YOU REPUBLICANS.

Seriously, terrorists? (1)

Aethedor (973725) | about 5 months ago | (#46851657)

Tell me, when was the last time terrorists did food poisoning?

Re:Seriously, terrorists? (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46851717)

The Republicans for years have been serving expired food to school children. They are responsible for tens of thousands of deaths. Also, they are feeding money to their medical cartel with all of the childen they are making sick. The only reason they allow us to have free school lunches for the poor and minorities is that they know it increases the number of their victims. Those people are sick.

Re:Seriously, terrorists? (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46852537)

Lol. Yea, Republicans do that all the time. It's on page 4 of the handbook they gave me at my first KKK meeting.
How fucking stupid are you?

Re:Seriously, terrorists? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46853469)

I can’t tell if you’re being serious or sarcastic since you added the KKK part which is a little over the top, but you nailed them. Their well organized racism and racial purity testing is getting out of hand. The food that is served in school lunches in poor areas would be considered unsafe in any reasonable area of the world. Instead, we have Republicans trying to shove pizza and french fries down their throats every school day. Their kind is disgusting.

Re:Seriously, terrorists? (3, Informative)

Trepidity (597) | about 5 months ago | (#46851727)

Weirdly, some hippie, sex-loving, heterodox Hindu preacher's followers tried it in 1984 [wikipedia.org] , infecting 751 people in Oregon with salmonella. But it didn't kill anyone.

Their hope had been that everyone would stay home sick from the local elections, so they'd be able to vote in their preferred candidate.

Re: Seriously, terrorists? (1)

Aethedor (973725) | about 5 months ago | (#46851789)

They don't classify as terrorists if you ask me. Not every lunatic murderer is a terrorist.

Re: Seriously, terrorists? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46852121)

Haven't you read the memo? Everything now classifies as terrorism: even military attacks against military targets are classified as such.

Re: Seriously, terrorists? (1)

plover (150551) | about 5 months ago | (#46852285)

If people who download music can be classified as file-sharing terrorists, then a calling every instance of murder 'terrorism' doesn't sound like much of a stretch.

Hearing the word 'terrorism' coming from a news figure or politician is now a strong indicator that you are listening to a dangerous, scheming, untrustworthy authority figure who is trying to manipulate you through fear. It should make you want to vote the scumbag out; or at least turn off the TV they're bullshitting you through.

Re: Seriously, terrorists? (1)

Jason Goatcher (3498937) | about 5 months ago | (#46857003)

I told my dad I felt the biggest act of terrorism was the bombing of Hiroshima and he started arguing with me about it. Finally he asked,"Well, what's your definition of terrorist?" I told him my definition was when someone physically or mentally harmed civilians to fight a war, that was terrorism. He got a thousand yard stare for a second, and then simply walked away.

Re:Seriously, terrorists? (1)

WoOS (28173) | about 5 months ago | (#46851829)

Their hope had been that everyone would stay home sick from the local elections, so they'd be able to vote in their preferred candidate.

Sounds to me like a different form of gerrymandering [wikipedia.org] of a group not privy to change the voting districts. Not terrorism as it does not aim at creating terror, so does not count as example. Not legal either, obviously, in contrast to the actual gerrymandering.

Re:Seriously, terrorists? (1)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46851765)

When was the last time you ate at a fast food chain?

James Bond (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46851661)

will use this in his next movie, apparently. Q told this to MI6 which was tapped by NSA and leaked by Snowden to me.

A Republican proximity sensor (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46851681)

would be so much more useful. They have get togethers to celebrate children they’ve killed with their polluting of the air and water. A sensor to detect if a Republican was near would be awesome. It would help keep you from being murdrred by them. That is the fate they want for all minorities and the poor.

Chaumas (2)

rossdee (243626) | about 5 months ago | (#46851691)

Every Great House should have a poison snooper

Re:Chaumas (1)

Vitriol+Angst (458300) | about 5 months ago | (#46852229)

Honestly, I don't know how it can tell the difference between snooping a fast-acting poison and a Happy Meal.

Re:Chaumas (1)

DexterIsADog (2954149) | about 5 months ago | (#46852415)

It is no longer edgy to call fast food and other low-nutrition products "poison".

Re:Chaumas (1)

plover (150551) | about 5 months ago | (#46852311)

Great, so now they're automating the job of Royal Food Tasters. More unemployment. We should have Congress pass a law protecting their business model!

Re:Chaumas (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46853357)

They're not paid.
You know all those kids taking tours of the White House? That's what they're for.

captcha : amaretto

Re:Chaumas (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 4 months ago | (#46877597)

Chaumurky is worse, imo, but here's hoping...

Leto II in 12,094!

Put on cans? (1)

mlts (1038732) | about 5 months ago | (#46851707)

I don't know how cheap/expensive this would be... or if it would be possible, but maybe put this chip on canned goods or produce with some obvious "this stuff isn't fit for consumption" alert if the chip detects any toxins?

Re:Put on cans? (3, Informative)

WoOS (28173) | about 5 months ago | (#46851857)

From the article on botulism [wikipedia.org] it appears that commercially canned goods are safe (and even terrorist would have a problem to get the toxin into the can after sealing and cooking which destroys spores and toxin). And on home-made goods it might be a bit difficult to enforce attachment of a chip on every glass of canned fruits.

The analyzed attack vectors seem to be (according to the German wikipedia entry on the toxin [wikipedia.org] , the english one is too occupied with medical use) milk, water and air. All of them do not lend well to chip attachment.

Actually the chip talked about is for analyzing a patient's blood sample (see TFA) to detect he has been poisoned, not for detecting it in food.

Re:Put on cans? (1)

camperdave (969942) | about 5 months ago | (#46852359)

Not all botulism in canned food is the result of terrorism or maliciousness. Cans still get dented, and defective cans still make it through the manufacturing line. The chip would replace the "best before" date.

Mobile app for detecting neurotoxins (1)

abies (607076) | about 5 months ago | (#46851713)

I suppose it should be possible to develop application for smartphones which would detect if you are poisoned by some of neurotoxins, based on accelerometer. When your position changes to horizontal and you start to spasm, you would hear the smartphone say "Dear Sir/Madam. Poison Exclamation Mark Poison Exclamation Mark Poison Exclamation Mark"
or, in case of my phone:
"Your beta version of voice synthetizer just expired, please download the new voice library from Google App store".

Hope its cheap (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46851815)

If it doesn't cost too much it'd be a godsend to those of us who are (probably needlessly) overly cautious (or perhaps just paranoid) about this sort of stuff.

Re:Hope its cheap (2)

nospam007 (722110) | about 5 months ago | (#46851835)

"If it doesn't cost too much it'd be a godsend to those of us who are (probably needlessly) overly cautious (or perhaps just paranoid) about this sort of stuff."

It's completely harmless, people like it so much, actors, politicians and housewives (real or not) even inject it into their foreheads.

Perhaps it can detect that too?

Too late for Joffrey (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46851837)

Poor Joffrey.

The last time I heard about botulism (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 5 months ago | (#46851903)

in food was on an episode of The Littlest Hobo 30 years ago. Apparently it was a concern back then?

Re:The last time I heard about botulism (2)

camperdave (969942) | about 5 months ago | (#46852527)

That [youtube.com] was about a search for some missing kids. The botulism was just a MacGuffin [wikipedia.org] to get the ball rolling. The kids went camping and mom had packed some ham sandwiches. There was a radio announcement that the manufacturer was recalling canned ham, and when the mom checked the can's serial number... sure enough.

There are about 250 food recalls a year [inspection.gc.ca] with about a third of them related to microbiological issues like botulism.

how targeted (1)

iggymanz (596061) | about 5 months ago | (#46852435)

this is great, because people are dropping like flies from food terrorism, usually botulism, and nearly always the particular strain this detector can find. yeah, just like the recent article on all those nuke plant insiders ready to pounce to sabotage plants, fear mongering bullshit.

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