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George Lucas May Be Completely Evil

chrisd posted more than 12 years ago | from the historical-revisionism-stinks dept.

Star Wars Prequels 1036

gabec writes "Sci-fi Wire is reporting a couple rumors about the changes being made to the original Star Wars trilogy for its next release. That being that Natalie Portman may be being inserted into Episode VI: Return of the Jedi and that universally reviled Jar Jar Binks may be being inserted into Episode IV: A New Hope. May The Force forbid." Mind you this is reported as rumor, but it's so unsurprisingly possible...

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THIS POST! (-1, Offtopic)

returnofthe_spork (552824) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603453)

You all wanted it, but I got it. THIS POST!

Re:THIS POST! (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603462)



RecipeTroll (572375) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603566)

Braised Chicken Chinese Style

1 hen,125 g Job's tears,chive shreds, ginger shreds,coriander shreds, vinegar, sesame oil, flour, netmeg powder, amomum fruit powder, cassia bark powder and other traditional Chinese tonics


Kill the hen, remove its intestines, clean it, boil it with Job's tears, then simer them for 3-4 hours with a gentle fire, when they are well-done, take out the hen and remove its bones and shred the meat with hands.
Put the chive shreds, ginger shreds and flour in the chicken left in the pot, then the netneg powder, amomum fruint powder, cassia bark powder and other traditional Chinese tonics, stir them up and boil them into colloid.
Put the chicken meat shreds in a small bowl, pour the colloid in the bowl too, get ready the chive shreds, coriander shreds, vinegar, sesame oil placed in each dish as seasonings for dining.

First Post (-1)

L0rdkariya (562469) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603454)

I'm tired.

Signature (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603596)

I will pray for your soul and hope that you'll repent in time. I have seen the future of the USA and it is One Nation Under God where antichristians will not be tolerated.

Stupid Star Wars nerds (4, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603456)

You're like abused wives. You keep coming back for more, even though it hurts.

Re:Stupid Star Wars nerds (4, Funny)

digitalunity (19107) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603546)

I'll take all the punishment George can give out for just a little more Natalie Portman


Re:Stupid Star Wars nerds (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603590)

Yeah, since when was more natalie such a bad thing?

Slightly offtopic, but I'd like to share with the slashdot community that there was this guy beating his girl out in front of my apartment today, and I scared him off with my katana. I fucken love samurai swords, and the dumb nerds like me who actually have one : )

It's funny cause it's true (2, Insightful)

wrinkledshirt (228541) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603574)

You're like abused wives. You keep coming back for more, even though it hurts.

The parent will probably end up at -1 flamebait pretty soon, but it's actually an appropriate sentiment.

If you don't like what Lucas has done or is going to do (Episode 7 anyone?), just give your money to someone else. Break the cycle. His ego is such that he doesn't care if people hate Jar Jar or any of his other silly CGI insertions. AotC will make him millions and episode 3 will make him millions more, regardless. Just let it be and go focus in on other movies and moviemakers. They'll appreciate your 10$ more than Lucas ever will, I'm sure.

Re:Stupid Star Wars nerds (3, Funny)

Gorbie (101704) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603594)

In Boston we can get the fans at the Fleetcenter to chant "Wife-beater" at Jason Kidd during a playoff game. Maybe we need to come up with a chant for Lucas to be heard at theaters across the nation.


Of course any chant with Jar-Jar's name in it wouldn't be worth the breath it we'll leave him out of it!

The most insightfull Slashdot post yet! (1)

VividU (175339) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603628)

Good Job!

Maybe interesting... (2, Insightful)

bluprint (557000) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603468)

who wants to see the exact same movies re-released anyway? Just rent the tapes....

I thought she was dead. (2, Insightful)

UnhandledException (254634) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603472)

Didn't Leia say, "She died when I was very young." Wait, they're not going to make her a jedi-ghost, are they?

Re:I thought she was dead. (2, Insightful)

Triskaidekaphobia (580254) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603507)

If Obi-Wan lied to Leia about her brother then he could have lied about her mother as well.

That said, Lucas is incredibly naive if he thinks anyone is going to accept Jar-Jar being added to Ep IV. Personally, I think AICN has been fooled yet again.

Re:I thought she was dead. (1)

GenericJoe (16255) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603510)

Didn't Luke say the same thing about his father?

Hey, maybe she'll be the new Dark Lady of the Sith or something...


Re:I thought she was dead. (1)

stipe42 (305620) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603513)

Well Luke thought his father was dead, so why not his mother too? Darth Padme will be in a black leather get up complimenting Vader's attire. And don't forget the computer generated Leia-Padme lightsaber battle.


Re:I thought she was dead. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603558)

well of course it wont be computer generated - they'll use the same actors - mind they'll have to send padme away on a long sub-light time-dialated trip to explain the apparent age differences (oh yeah that and the accident with the wrinkling ray)

Re:I thought she was dead. (3, Insightful)

Saint Nobody (21391) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603531)

and luke thought his father died when he was very young, too. what's you're bloody point?

luke's father isn't dead. he wnet to the dark side and became darth vader.

Re:I thought she was dead. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603559)

In all reality, we don't know if she is talking about her real birth mother, Padme, or her adoptive mother, Bail Organa's Wife.

Re:I thought she was dead. (2, Funny)

brain-in-a-box (168001) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603586)

If they can clone thousands of storm troopers, we shouldn't they clone Luke Skywalkers mother, too ?
This will result in a funny scene:
Yoda: If he fails everything is lost.
Obi-Wan ghost: No, there is still his sister.
And if she gets screwed, we can still clone them 1384 times.

Re:I thought she was dead. (1)

unicron (20286) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603587)

We're getting DEEP into nerdism here(Yuzhan Vong, Ben and Anakin children, the works)but Leia may be refering to her adopted mother on Alderan. I'm not sure if she ever even knew she was adopted, so it's a possibility.

It's interesting to note that while Vader does know he had a child, it isn't until he reads Luke's mind in ROTJ does he realize he had twin children.

It's even further interesting to note that during Luke's scenes in Jabba's lair, a bounty hunter and Jedi apprentice named Mara Jade was also their, acting under orders from Admiral Palpatine to kill Luke. She wasn't granted access to Jabba's slave barge when it journeyed to the Sarlac, so she was forced to leave. She later ends up marrying Luke and having children that can force grip as infants. Even grip beings immune to the force.

I know, I'm a dork. But man do I feel at home here.

Re:I thought she was dead. (1)

ryepup (522994) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603589)

That would be the best possible way of including her in there. Any other way would just be insane. I mean, we all know her death is what's going to throw Anakin over the top to become Darth Vader.

I knew it.... (5, Funny)

NetJunkie (56134) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603474)

As soon as Lucas said he was waiting for the new three to be released before putting the originals on DVD, I said he was going to do this. What will it be called, Super Special Edition? Speciai Edition Pro? 32-Bit Special Edition Turbo?

Re:I knew it.... (-1, Offtopic)

Tom Finch (581983) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603518)

Why are you using decimal? Decimal gets down modded very quickly. Restate using hexadecimal (using 10h for sixteen, for example).

Re:I knew it.... (4, Funny)

flying_triguy (560874) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603615)

How about Star Wars Trilogy - XP

Another one? (1)

GNUman (155139) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603476)

Is this like the time it was rumored that Anakin would be played by Leonardo Di Caprio in Episode II?

Surprise, Surprise (2, Interesting)

GenericJoe (16255) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603480)

Anyone who is surprised that Lucas is going to re-do the first trilogy, releasing it after episode III probably shouldn't be using a computer to surf the web.

It'll make a ton of money, and maybe (just maybe) he'll fix his continuity problems.


Now we know who the sith apprentice is :-) (2, Insightful)

vkg (158234) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603484)

George has obviously gone over to the dark side, trying to cause as much dissension and strife as possible among the people.

So here's the quandary: do we take the bastard out now, or do we try to figure out who the sith lord is?

the actual story (3, Funny)

YaRness (237159) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603485)

is here. []

if the author's command of english is any demonstration of the reliability of his unmentioned sources, there's little to fear about natalie being inserted into the original trilogy.

however, i would have nothing against jar jar taking greedo's first shot in the chest, allowing han to do the heroic thing and finish him off.

err, finish off greedo that is, not jar jar.

But why??? (4, Insightful)

RayChuang (10181) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603486)

I'm not sure if this is even a good idea.

It might work for continuity purposes (in George Lucas' mind), but frankly, most Star Wars fans prefer Episodes IV-VI to be as unchanged as possible even after Episode III is released. Lucas will be accused to overtinkering with the first Star Wars trilogy, and that won't win him friends among old-time Star Wars fandom, that's to be sure.

Re:But why??? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603532)

Old-time Star Wars fans don't buy the merchandise. The kids who JUST LOVE Jar Jar Binks do.

HEY! (5, Funny)

Dirtside (91468) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603487)

Jar-Jar is not UNIVERSALLY reviled: the Galactic Senate heartily approved of his proposal to grant Emp^H^H^HChancellor Palpatine emergency powers! Heck, even Anakin seems to like Jar-Jar, and we know what a hothead he can be. Don't you think Anakin would have dismembered Jar-Jar at the first opportunity if JJB was REALLY so reviled?

Binks: A Future For Your Children. A Future For The Republic. Vote Today.

So... (2)

rde (17364) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603489)

So this means that our beloved RotJ is going to be ruined by annoying creatures added in to appeal to the kids? Nooooooo!

Next thing you know, he'll follow it up with a movie called Jar Jar : The Battle for Naboo, which'll be inane, cute and a travesty of... oh, wait.

No need for hysteria (5, Interesting)

ShawnDoc (572959) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603490)

The main rumor is that Portman will film a "flashback" scene to be inserted into ROTJ when Luke asks Leia if she remembers her mother. (Implying that Leia was born a few years before Luke)

Personally, I like the idea of this. It helps tie all 6 movies together and makes them seem like the series they are supposed to be. I mean, its not like he's totally changing the movie like he did with ANH and the Greedo scene.

Re:No need for hysteria (1)

Xaoswolf (524554) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603561)

A short flashback showing portman would be a nice addition. A scene with Jar Jar talking to the Rebels(or perhaps the Emporer that he gave the power to) would be pushing it a little. As long as George Lucas uses common sense, then there should be little or no problem.

It's the part about him using common sense that concerns me, I'm not too sure he has that much left...

Re:No need for hysteria (2)

scott1853 (194884) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603581)

I wonder, could somebody actually watch all the movies in sequence without nitpicking the last 3 to death between the story and the special effects (or lack of).

What about the DMCA? (2)

Limburgher (523006) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603491)

Does Lucas really have a legal right to change my copies of the Original and Special Edition Trilogies?

I suppose he considers this a bugfix release. . .

Lucas Doesn't Go Far Enough... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603492)

I think Natalie Portman should be inserted in ALL movies and TV shows.

And the word "inserted" leads to many dirty jokes, which I shall not utter aloud in such a classy place as Slashdot.

But the only thing Jar Jar should be inserted in is a gas chamber.


Not gonna happen (0)

Walrus99 (543380) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603493)

I doubt Lucas would mess with his earlier creations. Anyway, I think Amidala gets killed in Episode III, part of Ani's turn to the DARK SIDE. I don't really care what happens to Jar-Jar. Hey, does anyone know where the scenes of the Lake Palace in E-2 were filmed? Was it a real location or CGI?

Re:Not gonna happen (2)

GuyMannDude (574364) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603607)

I doubt Lucas would mess with his earlier creations.

I think John McEnroe said it best:


Lucas has constantly tinkered with modifying his "earlier creations." Just try to find a copy of the original Episode IV where Solo shoots first.

And from the story:

Lucas also reportedly told E! Online that the reason droids C-3P0 and R2-D2 have no memory of Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader is because their memories have been wiped prior to the beginning of Episode IV, the original Star Wars movie.

Man, that is the absolute worst explanation I have ever heard. Anyone who honestly thinks Lucas had these stories all planned out years ago is deluding themselves. Face it, Lucas is making this stuff up as he goes along.


How dare he... (5, Funny)

tswinzig (210999) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603494)

...make changes to his own movie!

Re:How dare he... (2)

sphealey (2855) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603569)

How dare he make changes to his own movies?
Once an artist releases a work, it becomes a much a property of the audience as of the artist. If he has the legal right to change it later (say, after it has become wildly popular?), and he does so, that is of course his business. But he shouldn't be surprised if the audience does not accept the revised work, nor if the audience villfies him for so doing.


HAHAHAH The arrogance (2)

Augusto (12068) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603614)

But he shouldn't be surprised if the audience does not accept the revised work

Oh yeah, how much do you want to bet that these DVDs with new footage will sell like hotcackes ?

And (roughly) 50 years later... (1)

goldspider (445116) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603496)

...Padime (Natalie Portman) will still look exactly the same. Thank god (an Lucas, I guess) for artistic lisence!

And the craptification will be complete (2)

Anomolous Cow Herd (457746) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603503)

I'll admit it, I really did enjoy the original Star Wars Trilogy.

However, Lucas just didn't figure out that he should've quit while he was ahead. So we get bullshit like Episode I. What an utter disappointment. That was the last new Star Wars movie that I'll ever be tricked into seeing. What remains is only the manifestation of Lucas's desire to ride the wave of merchandising income driven by the sheer inertia of the franchise. The only people that I really see as enjoying the new breed of Star Wars movies are those who are in denial of its poor quality, those who refuse to believe that the best days of their favorite Sci-Fi adventure series is behind them.

Sorry, folks. All good things must come to an end.

Why? (2)

crumbz (41803) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603505)

Why is he altering the originals? To screw with our collective mind? It's like removing words from the dictionary in 1984. He is a very bad man, IMHO.

Re:Why? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603572)

He is a very bad man, IMHO.

don't you mean double ungood?

Whose movies are they? (1)

oldstrat (87076) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603506)

They are George's movies and he can do with them what he wants.
If he choses to destroy the 'image' in our eyes he can - he's the artist, not us.

Huh? (1)

russx2 (572301) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603509)

I don't get it... why would Lucas insert new scenes into movies 30 years old. It seems a long way to go to cover his ass in terms of plot dependencies... I thought he had it all planned out anyway?!

I can't see how this will help the story anyway, as a previous poster said, how is he going to release them anyway? On some vastly expensive DVD boxed set I'd imagine.

Nah, my advice, leave the second part of the trilogy well alone... you've already mucked up the first!

He should spend his time . . . (2)

Ezubaric (464724) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603511)

fixing what's wrong with Episodes I & II. I'm sure there's more extra footage around, and it wouldn't be too hard to shore up the plot in those two installments. I would pay to see The Phantom Edit on the big screen, and I'm sure we could even completely replace Jake Droid with a more lifelike computer animation.

Certainly the "oops . . . I just blew up a fleet" scene could be repaired.

Lucas' revisionist history (0)

gripdamage (529664) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603512)

Lucas is saying he deliberately left blank areas on the screen for these characters since 25 years ago he didn't know who would be cast, but he knew exactly where he wanted to put them. Much like he's known the whole story of the 6 movies all along...

Will the inserted Natalie Portman (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603514)

be naked and pertified ?
If yes, then George Lucas is not evil but a Saint.
If we are really lucky, he'll insert some hot grits, too.

ha (2)

Jucius Maximus (229128) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603516)

"Mind you this is reported as rumor, but it's so unsurprisingly possible... "

That gives it away.

Score:-1, Troll

Sniff out leak (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603519)

Sounds like an attempt to find people within Lucasville who leak info to the media.

[Offtopic] Slashdot banners? (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603521)

Have you noticed that some top page banners on Slashdot *have doubled* their sizes? My lord, this is starting to get a Yahoo-like approach...

Who cares anymore? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603522)

I mean really StarWars was amazing in the 70's and got progressively worse. Then after a 20 year absence we get the pathetic Episode I. I have yet to waste my money on Episode II (my 10 year old sister could have come up with a better name than Attack of the Clones).

This is sad really because technology was no longer a constraint. Unfortunately the StarWars series is now all fluff.

revised ep's IV thru VI? (1)

EricBoyd (532608) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603524)

I didn't even know that Lucas was going to revise episodes four through six. Is he going to release them again, in *another* special remastering, with all new footage? Isn't that blatent cash cow behaviour anyway?

If someone has any info on this, I'd be much oblidged if they posted the links below...

Websurfing done right! StumbleUpon []

I thought jar jar was toast (1) (557454) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603526)

But the last rumor I had heard was that jar jar wasn't even supposed to be in episode 2. Remember all the controversy, "jar jar is a racial slang" stuff? I was surprized to see him in episode 2 because of all the public outcry from the first one. At least they gave him a small roll, and had him do an epicly stoopid thing. Maybe we will get to see his excecution in episode VI.

There's only one thing to say (2)

Wind_Walker (83965) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603527)


I wish that you people would at least *think* before you post online rumors like this one. Jar Jar in Episode 4? It takes place 30 years after Episode 3 ends, and the Gungans have a life span of only 25 years (from Episode 1). And where could Portman get worked into the plot of Jedi? There are no lines in the whole movie that reference a mother figure, only "I am your father". If anywhere, it would be in Empire, where Luke is talking to Obi Won, asking about his parents and finds out about his sister.

Special Special Edition (2)

jimmcq (88033) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603528)

Personally, I liked most of the changes and enhancements of the "Special Editions" (except for Greedo shooting first).

I thought it was great they Jabba was added to A New Hope, and I look forward to seeing Natalie Portman in Return of the Jedi, but pleeeeease no more Jar Jar.

Re:Special Special Edition (2)

Saint Nobody (21391) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603626)

i don't care so much about greedo shooting first, when you compare it to that horrile jabba scene. i had almost managed to rationalize it away, thinking, "well he must have put on a few pounds between movies." after all, isn't it supposed to be several years in between episodes 4 and 6?

then i saw episode 1 and realized that george lucas just didn't see how hideous that scene was because his colon was blocking his view.

The obvious joke (1)

dfenstrate (202098) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603529)

That being that Natalie Portman may be being inserted into Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

If I where lucas, I'd do any kind of inserting with Portman that she'd let me.

nooooooo! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603530)

Holy Shit! My life is no longer worth living! Entire belief system being torn from core...

who fucking cares.

I applaud his efforts (1, Interesting)

PhysicsGenius (565228) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603534)

CGI and animation technology have come a long way since 1976, when Star Wars was first released. Sure, they are epic tales of love and death--but they need a little spice. I think it's a good idea to go back and touch them up in the slow spots. For instance, Chewbacka wasn't a necessary plot element and wasn't funny, either. Why not digitally replace him with the kid-pleasing Jar Jar?

That *has* to be vicious rumour (1)

Bob Loblaw (545027) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603536)

George Lucas actually _listened_ to the fans and the complaints about EP1.

Jar Jar featured far less promenently in EP2. I can only hope that he is keeping him around for EP3 to promenently feature his exploding death.

He also did not feature any nameless boy bands in EP2 AFAICT. Not that he couldn't have snuck them in somewhere still ... I'll leave that search to the SW purists.

Too bad he didn't listen to the other suggestions of getting someone else to write the dialog (like he did in TESB) ... peeee yeeew!

Isn't this the exact same crowd... (5, Insightful)

stubear (130454) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603537)

...that wants to eliminate copyrights so ANYONE can make changes like this on a whim?

Yeah, count my vote on that one.

Re:Isn't this the exact same crowd... (1)

tashanna (409911) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603632)

You're confusing 'wanting to make changes' with 'having changes forced upon'. The big issue is Lucas changing the movie (again) and saying "No! Really! This is the right and only version! Those other ones don't exist! No you can't have them." I can't hop into the Lucas CVS repository and pull out a previous version.


So? (1)

jonnyfish (224288) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603539)

Obviously Lucas cares about a little thing called continuity. Does it really matter? If you're hardcore enough to consider this a bad thing (or even care at all), chances are you already have the original trilogy. He can go about his business. Move along.

Bah, who really cares. (1)

Elyas (59360) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603542)

I've seen the old ones, I'll probably buy the new ones and watch them. If it makes the movies make more sense when my as yet unborn children see it, so be it.

Regardless, it's not going to make that much of a change, and anyone who's panties get in this much of a knot at the thought of an additional 30 seconds in a movie to insert a cameo by a character needs to grow up.

Re:Bah, who really cares. (2)

Hoi Polloi (522990) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603602)

Might as well add a few snippets to 2001 (maybe showing the aliens installing the monoliths?), Mr Roberts (they briefly stop at an island taken over by a mad Marlon Brando), etc. Films are like cuts, please stop picking at them or you'll just make them worse.

quick! buy the originals now! (1)

kraada (300650) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603544)

before all you can find are the "improved" version! Time to go fire up gnutella and start looking for A New Hope . . .

Jar Jar dies? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603545)

I'll be fine with Jar Jar in Episode IV if his appearance is for 3 seconds as a drunk in the bar on Tatooine who gets killed just as Luke & Co are walking in to look for a pilot.

George goes down another notch (1)

ejaytee (186527) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603547)

It was bad enough that he stopped making great movies. Now he wants to go back and make the great movies worse.

At least it levels the playing field somewhat.

Hold on to those only-slightly-enhanced VHS trilogy releases.

Not necessarily bad... (1)

Little Dave (196090) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603548)

Provided its done right, and doesnt change the story, this might be a good thing. It will help to seamlessly blend the two trilogies without the glaring continuity problems that will inevitably crop up. A quick scene to explain why no one recognises the droids (maybe Owen Larrs confiding that he thinks they look familiar when he buys them, but dismissing it that when you've seen one R2 unit you've seen them all) or some shots of Jimmy Smits on Alderon just before this shit hits the fan might do wonders for interlinking two stories that were clearly not very well thought out to begin with.

Of course, this is with the proviso that he offers the originals AS WAS and UNTOUCHED on the DVDs, and that the extra scenes are simply an optional extra.

Classic Edition (1)

bman08 (239376) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603552)

Can they just do a classic version so I can see Star Wars like it was when I saw it in the drive in movie theatre in 1977. My VHS copies are getting a little spotty from old age.

Maybe he can fix some of the crap... (1)

BagOBones (574735) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603556)

Man maybe he could UNDO some of the changes in the Special Editions. 1. REALLY REALLY BAD CG Jabba the hut.. the one in E1 looked much better 2. Grebo should not look like he is shooting Han, there is reson enough to off him with out making him look like a bad shot. 3. Change all the Ewoks into little Wookies? 4. Improve the aim of the storm troupers who seem to get REALLY dumb in Empire and Return What ever he does good or bad you know if it is a Star Wars movie it will make lots of money.

Makes me glad that I already bought the videos. (1)

AltGrendel (175092) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603560)

They can't change em once you own them.

Han Solo won't stand for this! (1)

bc90021 (43730) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603564)

I think that Han Solo will take one look at Jar Jar Binks and blow his head clean off with his laser pistol. Anyone else?

i'm losing my mind (1)

robburt (139183) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603568)

"Mind you this is reported as rumor, but it's so unsurprisingly possible... " This certainly is a give away, but I just got one of those ice-cream headaches when I saw this. Why does Lucas think that it's ok to distort the past. I guess he doesn't understand the meaning of a "Classic", I mean how can something be said to "stand the test of time", if we don't leave it alone?

I hope they insert something making Star Wars WIDE (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603570)

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Bar Scene (5, Funny)

falser (11170) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603573)

I think I'd be happy with this news if they decide to replace the alien that was bullying Luke with Jar Jar, and instead of Obiwan cutting off his arm he decides to rid the Star Wars universe of him once and for all:

JJ: "Meesa wanted man in 12 systems!!!"

Luke: "I'll be careful"

JJ: "Yousa be dead like a da Gungans!!!"

(swoosh! - lops off his head)

Ambivalence... (1)

ndogg (158021) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603578)

I'm ambivalent about this move. Natalie Portman==good. Jar Jar Binks==bad. If he stopped at Natalie Portman, I would have said he's a saint, but Jar Jar Binks! I'm not so sure...

Natalie Portman May Be Completely Hot (1)

UVABlows (183953) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603579)

But she isn't (contrary to popular belief) and George Lucas isn't going to do this. Move along people.

plot as a function of time (1)

ln(Omega) (581956) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603583)

This could raise interesting questions for the time-evolution of myths/stories/cultural commonalities. Usually a movie like Star Wars would have a limited lifetime until people got bored of it, and succeeding generations either would or would not pick it up again as being applicable to their life and time (see the Spiderman vs. Star Wars post from a few days ago). But if movies are altered not just to spice up the special effects but to actually alter the plot, there's potential for significant change in plot or even theme. Then "Star Wars" is no longer one movie, or three movies, or six movies plus digital enhancements of the first three. Suddenly it becomes a whole spectrum of stories, with the state of the Star Wars saga in, say, 2006 being potentially totally different from the state of the Star Wars saga in 1995 or even 2002. Comparison of the individual movies with their potentially-to-be-released enhancements could be interesting from the standpoint of what this says about our culture's evolution.

hey kids (1)

Jacer (574383) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603588)

i think that the episodes 4 5 and 6 should be redone, with someone other than two coke addicts in the lead roles (mark hammil and carrie fischer) and put in some more of the newly choreographed fight scenes which are ow so tastey none of that shit between luke and vader, as lucas called the fight, between an untrained boy and a cripple! haha

Meesa thinks (2)

teslatug (543527) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603591)

I might skip watching the SW's movies...they've gotten "lazy" in the creativity department anyway.

Re:Meesa thinks (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#3603609)

You blow, that other guy blows, and so does that guy up there.

May not be that bad. (5, Insightful)

Papa Legba (192550) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603593)

First I want to say that any lengthy insert would be a disaster. I think their is no argument at all on that subject.

I can , however, see where a small insert would be helpfull to the story line. Something like a shot of jar jar watching luke meet obiwan and saying "the circle starts again" or something similar IANASW( I am not a script writer). A small item to help tie the first three with the next three. With the way that these movies were filmed, in reverse order, Something like this may be necesary to make them feel as a whole series again.

The other possibility is that he needs to add elements to tie the last three to the middle three. For an example having queen amadala show in return to say that she was never gone but hiding out and once the emporer is defeated we need to go do this. He may have excluded these parts in the original filming becuase it would have created a cliff hanger in the movie that would not be resolved for 30 to 40 years. Now he can add it and start the work, striving for a completed nine movies over three sets of three.

The point is a little dash of extra may not be so bad, have to see it to judge. Let's just hope this is not done as some marketting stunt to get us all buy the movies AGAIN.

Looks like we're screwed for the DVDs (2)

Rob Parkhill (1444) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603599)

Since Lucas claims to be waiting for the current trilogy to be complete before releasing IV, V, and VI on DVD, it looks like we'll end up being stuck with the latest and greatest bastardization of the originals. Time to invest in a laser disc player.

Maybe there will be a hidden feature that will let you play the movie in the original, uncut version.

Tragic (4, Funny)

Washizu (220337) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603610)

How dare he ruin the series by making changes to it after it was released.

Ooh a new halflife patch!

progress... (0)

pizza_milkshake (580452) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603611)

the more lucas goes on the more he defiles star wars... i'm hanging onto my vhs copies of the original-originals... when will the insanity end?

Darth JarJar (2)

cybrpnk2 (579066) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603613)

If they're doing all of this revision, I hope JarJar officially goes over to the Dark side and becomes kind of a mini-me to Vader. Call him Darth JarJar. In Episode IV - Death Star Officer to Vader - "(insert new footage of JarJar)The two of you...are the last of the Jedi Order...later, ObiWan can fight BOTH a digitally inserted JarJar and Darth at the same time in a two-on-one fight like in Ep 1. Etc, Etc, the possibilities are endless...

What Lucas Doesn't Mention... (2, Funny)

DeLabarre (236800) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603619) that R2D2 and C3PO's memories are accidentally wiped during a bungled attempt to upgrade their firmware in Flash ROM...

George Lucas said in an Interview (1)

Krach42 (227798) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603621)

In an interview with Maxim, George Lucas said that if he rereleased the old Star Wars trilogy, that it would be just to get it to a new generation. (Meaning: no new footage.)

Also in Episode III... (1)

ilyag (572316) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603623)

I imagine, Naboo will be renamed to Alderaan. Also, just to piss everyone off, Darth Vader will kill Anaken and Darth Sidous will kill Palpatine. Episodes 4-6 are waiting to be remade...


Bootleg Episode 3 (4, Funny)

DanMcS (68838) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603624)

You know, I hear that if you cross the International Date Line thrice, backwards, at the equator, and then find the proper site in Taiwan, you can get a copy of Episode 3 before Lucas has a chance to mess it up...

Finally saw SW:EII Sunday (1)

ackthpt (218170) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603625)

While I was lead to believe that Jar Jar would pretty much shut up in Episode II, he talked and babbled a bit more than I cared for, but the rest of the film made up for it. (Note: Reviewers who didn't like it should avoid reviewing any other Lucas films)

Inserting Amidala/Padmé into the other films wouldn't do anything but confuse fans, offering nothing in the way of the story. Same goes for Jar Jar, only adding suffering to fans.

I do hope, after E III they run IV thru VI in theaters again. Preferably in the summer after E III comes out, it would be cool to watch I (even w/Jar (ugh) Jar) and II at home then III through VI at the theater. I'd be there. 8^)

an analogy (1)

paradesign (561561) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603631)

lucas is to film as gates is to software.
excessively meddling and tainting
JJB reminds me of that stupid fucking paperclip in word. they both need to be shot. i cannot wait to see the assanation of JJB in the senate in ep3.

This raises the question (1)

Microsift (223381) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603633)

Can Return of the Jedi be any worse? There was some cool stuff in the movie, but of the four Star Wars films I've seen Episode VI comes in at a distant third behind IV, which lost to Episode V by a nose. I haven't seen episode II yet, sacrelige I know...

Filmmakers need to stop screwing around with their films. It's one thing to add scenes that were deleted, but the changes made to Episode IV, and E.T are unforgiveable. I for one was satisfied with the world where Han Solo shots first, and Elliot's mom thought his costume made him look like a terrorist.

I understand the director of To Kill a Mockingbird is going to release a version with an all white cast to remove the racial overtones of the film.

Why I don't have a problem with this (1)

CathedralRulz (566696) | more than 12 years ago | (#3603634)

I realize that Lucas had a vision for these movies, and that technology and budget limited this vision for the first three films.

That he is now able to bring the original three films closer to this vision, I think, is wonderful. It may inspire others who were limited by budget and technology to go make re-releases of their films. Good example: ET

I understand the arguments of the purist who would prefer to leave things as they are. I think the people who made ET got it right - they made the DVD with both the completely un-retouched version and the 'updated' version that is closer to the creator's vision.

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