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A Rock Moves In Space

timothy posted about 12 years ago | from the don't-justify-any-orgies-just-yet dept.

Space 846

theBrownfury writes: "The BBC is reporting here that a very large Earth collision course asteroid has been discovered. This asteroid, NT7, was first observed on July 5th and current data suggests an impact date of February 1st, 2019. NT7 is 2kms wide and on date of impact will be approaching Earth at 28km/s. An asteroid of this size is large enough to cause continent wide destruction. However astronomers are still cautious in reporting this asteroid as the orbit of NT7 has not been fully verified. Current data on NT7's orbit suggests it orbits the Sun every 837 days and travels in a tilted orbit from about the distance of Mars to just within the Earth's orbit." The BBC article's headline (and accompanying illustration) are more alarming than the story itself seems to warrant: this asteroid has been given a 0.06 on the Palermo technical scale, which means it shouldn't bump getting run over by a llama off your list of worries.

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846 comments

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Hey hey, my my (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941471)

Rock and roll will never die.

first (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941472)

i love slashdot!

really!

Drivers (4, Funny)

Traxton1 (154182) | about 12 years ago | (#3941476)

God damn llama riders! Why don't they watch where they're going.

Re:Drivers (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941529)

Yeah, llama drivers are pretty bad. But that's NOTHING compared to those stupid SPACE LLAMAS FROM SPACE in their giant stone spaceships.. Gods, those llamas may be hyperintelligent, but i don't think there are any worse drivers in the entire metaverse.

What, you actually believe those are "asteroids"? Please, stop spouting silly Technocracy propaganda. Next you'll be telling us Lee Harvey Oswald killed JFK, and the moon landings were real :)

- Gene Ray
(Sorry I am posting anonymous, I have a slashdot account somewhere but i seem to have forgotten the password)

first post!!! (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941478)

foo baby!

FP (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941480)

I hope it hits Andover and destroys that ivory tower of faggotry!!!

And what if they find it is on a collision course (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941482)

Lets hope they find out which continent it will be so we know not to move there!

Re:And what if they find it is on a collision cour (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941615)

Dude, they just said earth shattering now...which continent will by save by that

oh by the way

If something bad happens...just know that Raster loves you..

THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ by poopbot (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941485)

Happy Troll Tuesday!

THE OFFICIAL TACO-SNOTTING FAQ [slashdot.org]
By J. Wipo Troll, Esq. [slashdot.org], $Revision: 1.16 $
[This article attempts to document a vile, ungodly practice that runs rampant through the homosexual geek and hacker community, a practice known as âoeTaco-snotting,â or simply âoesnotting.â Taco-snotting is something that few geeks dare talk about in free or open conversation, but it is nonetheless a widely-practiced and dangerous form of homosexuality. If you or anyone you know has ever engaged in Taco-snotting, please get professional help [adequacy.org] before it is too late. â"ed.]

Why do I keep receiving emails from an individual calling himself âoeCmdrTacoâ?
You have been receiving unsolicited mailings from a certain Robert âoeCmdrTacoâ Malda [cmdrtaco.net], owner of the popular technology website slashdot.org [slashdot.org]. Actually, itâ(TM)s not a very âoepopularâ site in the common sense of the word; the site is rife with pimply, antisocial geeks and hackers, zit-faced nerds, communists, dirty GNU hippies [yahoo.com], and other societal rejects and outcasts. Itâ(TM)s also home to one of the worldâ(TM)s largest suspected pædophile rings, the infamous âoeSlashdot crew.â
Whenever Mr. Malda gets bored (and who wouldnâ(TM)t, running a site like Slashdot all day), he roams through the user database, penis in hand, looking for people who might enjoy engaging in homosexual activities with him. How he determines this is anyoneâ(TM)s guess; but if you have a homosexual-sounding nickname, or a nick with a letter of the English alphabet in it, youâ(TM)re a potential candidate.
This time, he found you. Lucky you.

Mr. Malda seems to be speaking in some sort of code. Do you know what it means?
CmdrTacoâ(TM)s code language is relatively easy to decipher. This pervert prefers to speak in thinly-veiled sexual innuendo (yes, thatâ(TM)s right: he wants you) to evade the watchful eye of Slashdotâ(TM)s parent corporation, VA Software [yahoo.com]. Mr. Maldaâ(TM)s âoeCommanderâ is, of course, his penis: a small, withered little thing that lives in his pants and only comes out in the presence of other male geeks or at the beck and call of Maldaâ(TM)s own lubed-up right hand. His âoeTaco bells [sonymusic.com]â are the shriveled testicles that droop beneath his Commander, and his âoeTaco sauceâ is his thin, runny semen. It should be more than obvious to you now what he means if he asked you to âoering his Taco bellsâ or âoetaste his gourmet Taco sauce.â
I would also guess CmdrTaco asked you to engage in a practice known as âoeTaco-snottingâ and, if he was in a particularly depraved mood at the time, a âoecircle-snot.â

Good Lord. And, yes, he did. What is âoeTaco-snottingâ?
âoeTaco-snottingâ is the term used by Robert Malda to refer to the depraved act of fellating another man (homo- or heterosexual; CmdrTaco is rumoured to prefer raping unwilling victims), then blowing the semen out his nose and back onto the face and body of his victim. Naturally, a long, bubbly stream of milky-white semen is left on CmdrTacoâ(TM)s face [go.com], dribbling out of his nose and down his cheek: hence the term, âoeTaco-snotting.â
And if thatâ(TM)s not bad enoughâ¦
A âoecircle-snotâ is a Taco-snotting circle-jerk, another practice common among the Slashdot crew [bastardgenres.com]. CmdrTaco, CowboiKneel [aol.com], and Homos get together and snot each other with their gooey, sticky cum â" spooging their jizz-snot all over each otherâ(TM)s faces and pasty, white bodies, until theyâ(TM)re covered head to toe with their own and each otherâ(TM)s man juice. This vile, ungodly ritual can go on for hours. For the homosexual penetration that follows this lengthy foreplay, Roblowme is usually there to provide plenty of anal lubricant; he owns a limousine service and has ample supplies of motor oil and axle grease ready to go.
To complete this perverted orgy, fellow faggots Michael, Timothy, and Jamie will usually join in, dressed in tight leather mock-S.S. uniforms, jack boots, and leather gloves. The homosexual shenanigans that follow are nearly beyond description. The whole group begins to snot each otherâ(TM)s spunk and whip each otherâ(TM)s pudgy asses with riding crops and chains until their pale, white geek bodies are exhausted and soaked in stinking sweat from the hours of passionate, homosexual revelry.

Ewwwwww. So, can I stop receiving these emails?
Hopefully, but I wouldnâ(TM)t count on it.
To begin with, you most likely forgot to uncheck the âoeWilling to Snotâ checkbox in your account preferences. CmdrTaco has probably already got the hots for your wad (do you have a homosexual-sounding nick?), and heâ(TM)s probably already been lurking outside your bathroom window for weeks with a camera, some tissues and lube, just waiting to pounce and declare you his new bitch. Thereâ(TM)s no escaping a geek in heat (trust me), so itâ(TM)s probably too late for you, but you can possibly rectify this situation. To remove yourself from CmdrTacoâ(TM)s sights, log into your Slashdot account, go to your user page, click on Messages, and uncheck the box next to âoeWilling to Snot.â Maybe heâ(TM)ll ignore you. Probably not.

I canâ(TM)t stop receiving these emails from CmdrTaco!?
If you indulge him in a Taco-snot or two, hemight leave you alone. You might also want to look into mail filtering, restraining orders, or purchasing a heavy, blunt object capable of warding off rampaging homosexual geeks in heat. Trust me, when they charge⦠oh, the humanity. If he gets you, and you let him Taco-snot all over you, you will most likely end up tied up in his basement to be used as his sex slave for the rest of your life (or until he accidentally drowns you in spunk in a circle-snot).

Have you ever been Taco-snotted?
Unfortunately, yes. I first met Mr. Malda at an Open Source Convention [amazon.com]. He invited me back to his room for a game of Quake and some âoegourmet Tacos,â but when I got there, the perverted geek jumped me and handcuffed me to his bed, stripping me. After taking his âoeCommanderâ out of his pants, Mr. Taco made me suck the withered thing six times, virtually nonstop. He then performed his vile Taco-snotting ritual on me three times over the next two hours, bringing me to orgasm after orgasm after sweaty, mind-numbing orgasm⦠then he snotted my own thick, gooey jizz back onto my face out of his nostrils! He snotted me two more times, first into my mouth, then again on my exposed belly.
CmdrTaco invited several of his Open Source (or rather, âoeOpen Sauceâ â" man sauce) buddies over to continue their ungodly snotfest. European hacker and known überfaggot Linux Torvalds raped my ass [yahoo.com] with his âoemonolithic kernel [yahoo.com];â his partner-in-crime Anal Cox used their âoenetwork stackâ in a multitude of unspeakable ways on and in every orifice of my defenseless, tender, young body. Michael Sims was there in his leather Nazi uniform, caning my previously-virginal ass with a bamboo pole and ranting about âoeall those Censorware [spectacle.org] freaks out to get him.â

That is so disgusting! How did you finally escape?
After about 16 hours of countless unholy, homosexual atrocities perpetrated against my restrained body, they all finally went to sleep on top of me, sweat-soaked and exhausted. I was left there, completely covered in bubbly, translucent jizz-snot, chained to the bed, with half a dozen fat, pasty-white fags lying around and on top of me. Fortunately the spooge coating my flesh worked wonderfully as a lubricant â" I was able to squirm my way out of the handcuffs and slip out the back door (of the apartment, not their back doors). Iâ(TM)m just glad I survived the awful ordeal. These sexually-repressed hackers had alot of built-up spunk in their wads â" I couldâ(TM)ve easily been drowned!

Thatâ(TM)s horrible. Does âoeTaco-snottingâ have anything to do with CmdrTacoâ(TM)s âoespecial tacoâ?
No, thatâ(TM)s a different disgusting perversion CmdrTaco indulges himself in. Mr. Malda is usually not satisfied with merely snotting your own jizz back onto your face, he most often enjoys involving his own bodily fluids in his twisted games. WeatherTroll [slashdot.org] has spent some time trying to educate the Slashdot readership [slashdot.org] about this vile practice (emphasis added):
You may be wondering what CmdrTacoâ(TM)s âoespecial tacoâ is. You will be wishing that you hadnâ(TM)t been wondering after you finish reading this post. To make his âoespecial taco,â CmdrTaco takes a taco shell and shits on it. He then adds lettuce, takes out his tiny withered dick (otherwise known as his âoeCommanderâ), puts his âoespecial taco sauceâ on it which means he jacks off on the taco, and adds a compound to make the person who eats the taco unconscious. Of course, the compound does not make the person unconscious until the taco is fully eaten. Thus CmdrTaco force-feeds the taco to the unsuspecting victim. After all, who would knowingly eat shit and CmdrTacoâ(TM)s jizz?
After the victim is unconscious, he is held against his will and used for CmdrTacoâ(TM)s nefarious homosexual purposes. This includes shoving taco shells up the victimâ(TM)s ass, Taco-snotting, and getting Jon Katz involved. Trust me, you do not want Jon Katz anywhere near your unconscious body. Also, rumor has it CmdrTaco is looking for a new goatse.cx guy [goatse.cx]. Donâ(TM)t let it be you!
Different ungodly perversion, yet no less revolting. It should be clear to you now that Robert âoeCmdrTacoâ Malda is a very, very sick individual, as are most of the Slashdot editors.

Does Jon Katz get involved in any of this? I thought he was a pædophile, not a homosexual.
Actually, Jon Katz is a homosexual pædophile. Heâ(TM)s also a coprophiliac, and, many suspect, a zoophile. Mr. Katz is somewhat of a loner and doesnâ(TM)t involve himself in the circle-snots, but that doesâ(TM)t mean heâ(TM)s any less of a freak than the rest of the Slashdot crew. Katz often engages in a game called âoejuicy-douching [aol.com]â with a harem of little-boy slaves that he has collected over the years: yet another vile practice which involves administering an enema to himself of the little boyâ(TM)s urine (forced out of them with a pair of pincers), spooging the vile muck from his ass back into the enema bag, then dribbling and slathering the goo all over himself and the boyâ(TM)s chained, naked bodies. If heâ(TM)s in the mood, he will sometimes skip refilling the enema bag from his distended anus and just squirt it from his ass [microsoft.com] onto the crying, terrified boys. Unwilling boys are further tortured with the pincers until they comply and allow Mr. Katz to juicy-douche them at will. A boy will usually last about two years before Mr. Katz either accidentally drowns them in diarrhea or kills them once they get too old, usually around 13 or 14.
Not content with being a pædophilic coprophile, Mr. Katz is also quite the zoophile. As if the sexual escapades with the helpless little boys arenâ(TM)t enough, Jon usually enjoys his juicy-douches best when his penis is firmly planted in a female goatâ(TM)s anus [yahoo.com]. He is also rumoured to get off on watching his little boys eat the goatâ(TM)s small, bean-like turds, and he often kills his older boys by letting his goats trample them.

â¦Are you getting hard writing this?
Why, yes. :) Join me in a WIPO-snot?

No, thanks. Iâ(TM)m already CmdrTacoâ(TM)s boi toi.
________________________________________

* The URL of this document is
* Previous revisions are publicly available at

$Id: tacosnotting.html,v 1.16 2001/12/28 21:20:03 wipo Exp $
Copyright © 2001 J. Wipo Troll, Esq. [slashdot.org] Verbatim crapflooding of this document is permitted in any medium, provided this copyright notice is preserved, and next time you take a dump, you think of the WIPO Troll and all heâ(TM)s done to make Slashdot a better place.

- posted by poopbot: news for turds, stuff that splatters

fCOCO2fviU Post #603

Listen to the Simpsons. (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941486)

Lets burn down the observatory so this never happens again!

The strictest chan ever!! (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941487)

Hello!
This site is an introduction for my IRC channels.
This page was last updated Id: index.html,v 1.17 2002/07/09 22:09:42 dildo Exp
If you wish to visit my channels, you are expected to stay current with the information on this page. Ignorance of the material on this site will not be tolerated in my channels.

Before I begin, I would like to mention that I'm not a technical support person, nor am I an Internet tutor. I'm not good at teaching people how to use their computers or software or how to get on IRC. However, there are tutorials all over the World Wide Web that will help you with IRC. One such site is http://www.irchelp.org/. My channels are on DALnet, which also has its own information pages at http://www.dal.net/. The answers to most of the technical questions you'll have about IRC are probably going to be on one of those two sites.

Also, please observe proper IRC etiquette in my channels as well as in any channel you visit in general. Some etiquette tips include...

Always read the topic of an IRC channel when you enter the channel before you do anything else in that channel. If the topic includes links or triggers to display rules, be sure to read those too before doing anything else. That may be the only warning you get of any rules that the channel may have and the ops have every right to kick-ban you for not following those rules. Ignorance is not an excuse.
Treat everyone with respect. Do not type anything that is excessively violent or offensive. Refrain from foul language. Do not shout, do not repeat yourself, and do not flood the channel.
Do not pick up or propagate viruses. Never type any trigger with "//.write" in any channel. Do not send viruses, and try to avoid receiving them. More information about IRC viruses can be found at http://www.nohack.net/
Do not spam, and do not listen to spam. Never advertise porn or warez in any respectable channel. Never do anything to encourage spammers. Every time you join a channel or follow a link that a spammer sent, you're only proving to the spammers that they're right. Also, spammers will also often spam viruses. Not only are you encouraging spammers, but you may also be doing something that will compromise your machine.
Do not use the IRC invite feature to invite random people into or out of channels.
Some other general rules specific to me...

Do not talk about anything related to my server (including but not limited to this site, the server, these channels, the keys, the IPs, the list, the password) in any public or on-line medium (including but not limited to any website, any web forum, any IRC channel, any newsgroup, any chat/messenger/peer-to-peer platforms) except in #hitler-babble. Especially, do not talk about it in #nazimanufacturer, and do not privately message people about the server and the supporting server bits. If someone asks you about it outside of #hitler-babble, please let me know.
Do not give, share, or trade the channel keys, the channel information, or the site information. If you want to share, please download the files and share the files instead.
You must be identified to nickserv@services.dal.net before entering my channels. I know DALnet services can be very flaky, but please bear with it, please don't ask me about it, and please don't hammer DALnet services because that only makes the problem worse. If Nickserv is down, you'll just have to wait patiently until it come back up. If it doesn't respond the first time, give it at least 10 minutes before trying again.
No non-ASCII characters in my channels. No bold, no colors, no upside-down question or exclamations, no accented characters, no blobs. Only standard 7-bit ASCII.
Treat everyone with respect and use common sense. The rules above are not designed to be comprehensive. Unacceptable behavior is still unacceptable even if it wasn't explicitly mentioned above.

So, onto the channels... I have created two channels for myself -- #hitler and #hitler-babble. The first channel is mostly for my automated bot. Since it was made for the bot, it's unreasonably strict and unforgiving. But that lends itself to a very short list of rules.
Rules for #hitler:

You may only type the approved triggers. Do not say anything else. No !list, no @find, no talking except for the approved triggers. The ops may talk to #hitler, but you should not respond. Be aware that the triggers are case-sensitive, will never include spaces or quotes, and may change without any warning other than a topic change. Do not add extraneous spaces before or after the triggers. Be careful since the bot is very sensitive. Check twice before you type. Do not make mistakes. Any mistakes will be banned without further warning. Bans stay there until DALnet erases them by accident, until the banlist fills up, or until I decide to erase the banlist. I plan to erase the banlist about once a month, so just wait and do not ask to be unbanned and do not try to avoid the ban. If you ask to be unbanned, or if you try to avoid the ban, the temporary ban will be turned into a permanent ban. I know it was an unintentional, honest, small, stupid mistake. However, if I can't trust you to type in a simple trigger without making mistakes, how can I trust you to make complex downloads without accidentally hammering my server? Also, I strongly believe that even unintentional stupidity needs to be punished. Otherwise, my server and I end up drowning in unintentially stupid mistakes all the time.
As of yet, I have no idea how destructive #hitler might be. It's vaguely possible that people in the channel might flood off repeatedly once things get going. I recommend (but won't enforce) that you use a separate nick and separate instance of your client for #hitler to avoid annoying other channels in case something goes wrong. I'm not entirely sure that the channel will be very stable for very long... Again, this is not required, just a suggestion.
Discussion belongs in #hitler-babble. I will not watch #hitler on a regular basis (since the bot will just ban misbehaving people), so if something happens there that needs attention, please come to #hitler-babble and let me know or send me e-mail.
I reserve the right to kick the entire channel and change the key at any time. When I do that, please understand that it's not personal, and it's not meant as a punitive measure or anything -- it's simply a part of the normal operation of the channel. I also reserve the right to change the key at any time without kicking people. I reserve the right to change the rules as well. I just reserve the right to change anything.
Any discussion about my server should take place in the second channel. I hope to keep this channel quiet enough so that someone can say something about the status of my server and it'll still be easy to find in my scrollback buffer hours later. If you want to discuss anything anything other than my server, please contribute to the discussion in other channels instead.
Rules for #hitler-babble:

Read and honor the topic and rules of the channel.
Do not pick up or propagate viruses.
Be warned that spoilers are okay in the channel.
Do not talk about the relevant sites or channels in anywhere other than #hitler-babble. Do not share the channel key or channel information. Do not use the IRC invite feature to invite people into or out of the channel.
You must be identified to DALnet before entering the channel. I know that DALnet services are very flaky, but please bear with it, please don't ask me about it, and please don't hammer DALnet services.
No computer-generated messages in this channel. No on-join messages, no welcome-back messages, no away messages, no leaving messages, no back messages, no play lists, no fserve ads, no periodic/timer messages, no remotes. Do not have or use triggers that will be seen by the whole channel, and do not use excessively tricky, annoying, or offensive triggers.
Do not use offensive language, nicks, or idents. Do not flood, do not repeat yourself excessively, do not spam, do not use all-caps, do not anti-idle in the channel, and do not use any form of Denial of Service attack.
Do not beg for ops, voice, sends, or resumes. When asking questions, try to ask specific questions (do not ask if you can ask a question, do not ask, "Are you there?").
I'm a resident of the United States, and my material is in English. Please understand English before you join the channel, and please speak mostly English or Japanese in the channel. Also, I'm subject to US laws, and I will do my best to enforce US licenses. Although you're welcome to discuss the plot, character development, and general quality of propaganda (even if it's licensed), please do not mention possession of pirated US-licensed materials, do not mention where to obtain such pirated materials, and do not mention you're looking for the pirated materials. I'm aware that it's hard to keep up with licenses, so mistakes will be tolerated, but when someone provides reasonable evidence that it's licensed in the US, please stop discussing possession (anyone's possession) or procurement (anyone's procurement) of the material -- whether you are in the United States or not.
I will allow other people to serve in this channel, but your server may be more appreciated elsewhere. If you insist on serving, please serve non-US-licensed propaganda only. No mp3s, no warez, no porn, and no US-licensed material of any form.
Treat everyone with respect and use common sense. The rules above are not designed to be comprehensive. Unacceptable behavior is still unacceptable even if it wasn't explicitly mentioned above.
I reserve the right to kick the entire channel and change the key at any time. When I do that, please understand that it's not personal, and it's not meant as a punitive measure or anything -- it's simply a part of the normal operation of the channel. I also reserve the right to change the key at any time without kicking people. I reserve the right to change the rules as well. I just reserve the right to change anything.

Now onto the next page...

This site is an introduction for my IRC channels.
This page was last updated Id: server.html,v 1.47 2002/07/19 18:21:51 dildo Exp
If you wish to visit my channels, you are expected to stay current with the information on this page. Ignorance of the material on this site will not be tolerated in my channels.
The channels and the bots within them are designed to protect my machine. Please remember the machine is my private property, and you are downloading from my machine at my expense. As such, I reserve the right to deny access to my machine without warning or explanation. Also, while the machine is my private property, I recognize that the data on the machine isn't. If you see anything on my machine that should not be served for whatever reason, please let me know so I can stop serving it.

In case anyone is curious, here are the system specs:

Hardware: Tatung Super COMPstation SPARCstation 20 clone
CPU: 2 x 60 MHz sparc Yes, 60 -- as in less than one hundred MHz. This is why I really need each and every downloader to be very nice to the server -- the server will support a lot of clients only if the clients are well behaved. Any one of the clients downloading from my server can completely overrun my machine and ruin the server for themselves and everyone else.)
RAM: 512MB
OS: Solaris 7
Disks: 6 x 80GB Maxtor IDE disks in a RAID 5 configuration (approx. 400GB usable on a SCSI bus that runs at 20MB/sec or 160Mbps), plus an independent 7th identical disk on a slow IDE-SCSI bridge/converter
Net: 100Mbps fastethernet card, colocated in a data center with dual OC12s (OC12 = 622Mbps). Current bandwidth usage.
How it works...

I assume you're here because you really want to download from my server. My file list is here. There is also an HTML version with sizes and dates (that even has the pathnames translated for you!) but the catch is that this version has a _huge_ table. If you're running on a slow machine you may be waiting a very long time for the page to come up. There's been a lot of problems with small, fast connections on my site, so I just changed things so you can't browse the site. Therefore, you need the list. That should eliminate small, fast connections. Do not share the list, do not link to the list, and do not give people the URL to the list. The list updates frequently.
Once you have the list and actually know you want something from it, first connect to a DALnet server. If you still don't know how to do that, you should go back and re-read the previous information.
After connecting to DALnet, join the channel called #hitler. There is a key on the channel. Do not ask for the key. Do not give anyone else the key. Do not even give anyone else hints on where to find the key.
Type the trigger in the topic. When the bot sees that trigger, it'll see how many connections there are and give you the information you need to get onto the site if there's an open slot. Please be patient. If the bot isn't in the channel, it obviously can't respond to you. Also, the server can be very full, and the bot doesn't always respond to everyone so it doesn't flood itself out of the channel. Every time the bot talks back to you, it'll ignore you for 10 minutes. For every time you try to talk to the bot while you're ignored, it'll ignore you for 10 additional minutes. There is no limit to the amount of time the bot will ignore you. In addition, be aware of topic changes. Once the topic changes, anyone still using the old trigger will be banned.
If you get a message saying you're in a suspect domain, it's because there has been a lot of abuse from your domain. You can still get onto the server, but you need to be added to the whitelist. To get onto the whitelist, you need to e-mail me with the following information:
The Subject: heading must be "Whitelist: {nickname}". Be sure to put the registered nickname you want to be whitelisted.
Copy-paste the entire output of "/nickserv info {nickname}" and "/whois {nickname}" into the e-mail message.
Specify whether your IP is static or dynamic.
State the name and the exact version number (like the information from the "Help->About" box) of the program you will be using to download. Go through and list everything you changed or double-checked in the settings, options, and/or preferences to make it play nicely with my server. I simply want to make sure that people know how to set their downloading software to not hammer the server before I let them on.
Please write up a paragraph or two about how you started getting into downloading propaganda and how you found this current rules web site.
Once you get the information from the bot, you need to glue that to the rest of the filename found in the list and download the full URL. Note that you also have to convert metacharacters into the proper URL. Some browsers will automatically do the translation for you. Many will not. More information about the client configuration is on the client page. If you use IE, make doubly sure to read the client page before downloading. If you simply do not want to use a client that can translate the url, get the HTML version of the list.
If you need to talk about the server or any of the related pieces, please visit #hitler-babble. Do not privately message anyone about the server, do not discuss it any other IRC channel, and do not mention it in any other location. Since you've made it here, please do not give anyone any information about ol|Dildo and do not give anyone the key to the channel it's in either. And, no matter what, never give or ask for any URLs, keys, or passwords related to my site or my channels, not even in #hitler-babble. If there are _technical_ problems with the URLs, keys, or passwords, however, that can be reported in #hitler-babble.
Server rules...
I personally don't like rules, and I had originally thought I could just assume people had some sort of common sense. I found out the hard way that I was so very incredibly wrong. Some people insisted that I put rules on my web site before they would stop doing things that were hurting the server even after I asked them nicely to stop. So here are the rules:

Do not talk about the gateway bot, the site, the server, or these channels, on any web site, any newsgroup, any web forum, any channel, or in any other place other than on #hitler-babble. No matter where you are, even if you're in #hitler-babble, do not give or ask for any related URLs, keys, or passwords. (This also includes keys for the gateway bot.)
Do not abuse or attack the server. Every client must be well behaved. Even one misbehaving client can ruin the server for everyone, including themselves.
One connection per person at a time. This also implies one file per person at a time. Do not download more than one file at once. Do not farm your downloads to multiple machines in a cluster. Do not use segmented downloads. Do not use download accelerators to open multiple connections for the same file. Do not get greedy. Know how your software works before you download from my site, and double-check the settings before you start. Ignorance, greed, stupidity, and mistakes by your little brother are no longer acceptable reasons to be unbanned.
Do not use bad passwords. Stop downloading if you get a bad password prompt. Verify your password or fix your download settings before continuing. I reserve the right to ban anyone trying bad passwords.
Do not hammer the server. Give the server time to download the page. Do not click "stop" too quickly. Do not click "reload" more often than once every 2 minutes. Set any download managers to wait 2 minutes in between retries and to not retry an error more than twice. If you ever see a 403 error, that means you have multiple connections. Either you're hammering or your client is trying to reconnect before the server has recognized the previous connection has died. If that happens, you need to back off even more and stop retrying so quickly.
Do not give out the site information or the site password. I use the bot to control how many people may try the site at the same time. If too many people try the site, it'll just hang. If you give the password to someone else, that means there are too many people hitting the server and things will become slow and unstable for everyone, including yourself. Do not ask anyone for the password either. If someone asks you for the password, or if anyone gives you the password, or if you see anyone giving someone else the password, please get their ident by doing a /whois on them and copy-paste the log into an e-mail and report it to me, and I'll ban them from the channel and the server. I will keep also your information confidential.
I try to make sure that the material on this site is not licensed in the United States, but it may be licensed in your country. Please do not download episodes if they are licensed in your country. If I find that people from other countries are downloading episodes licensed in their countries, I may have to ban the whole country from the server because I don't want to deal with foreign authorities. Also, if something becomes licensed in the United States, please let me know, and I'll remove it.
The material on this site may not be appropriate for all audiences. There will be a very wide variety of data on this site, and there are no guarantees about the content here. Often, there will not be time to review the material on this site. By entering further into this site or downloading from this site, you agree that you will not hold anybody responsible for any of the content in this site, and neither will any of your representatives (such as parent or legal guardian). (Put simply, if you can't promise that your parents won't sue us, you can't download from this site.) Also, if you find that an episode does not work or if it pauses in strange places, please report the problem. Include the full pathname to the file, the symptoms you're experiencing, and the time index of the problem if applicable.
The rules above are not designed to be comprehensive. Unacceptable behavior is still unacceptable even if it wasn't explicitly mentioned above. In general, use common sense. If you are ever at all tempted to do something that might cause problems, just don't do it. If you're not sure if something is bad or not, ask permission before you do it. If you notice any mistakes in these rules, please let me know.
By visiting my server, you agree to stay current with and follow all the rules. If you agree, then you may use the channel key "Eat_Mydick" to get into the leeching channel. This is your only warning. If you break the rules, you may not get any further notices before being banned.
Contact information...

Dildo If you e-mail me, please include your nick, full ident, and IP address. I'll probably ignore messages if you don't include the information, and I'll probably ignore any e-mail that can be answered by reading this site carefully. If you're trying to report what you think is a problem, please copy-paste any potentially useful error messages you see into the message.
Upload ftp: ftp 127.0.01 port 21 username upload password upload Please note that the upload account does not support resumes.
More information about bans.
Request list: Last updated 2002 July 1.
IRC channels: #hitler and #hitler-babble on DALnet.
Other pages...

Notes about the files on the site (not done)
SFV checksums of every file on the site (not done)
Useful site news
Thank you to people who uploaded!

This site is an introduction for my IRC channels.
This page was last updated $Id: banfaq.html,v 1.11 2002/07/09 16:05:36 dildo Exp $
If you wish to visit my channels, you are expected to stay current with the information on this page. Ignorance of the material on this site will not be tolerated in my channels.

Bans Explained
I really hate having to ban people, but it's hard enough for my server to even keep up with serving episodes without having to deal with people who will destroy it in their eagerness to get anime. In order to protect my server from the few abusive people who can ruin my server for everyone else, I've had to come up with many different levels of bans. It can get confusing, so I figured I needed a page explaining the ways the pieces of my server can intentionally decide to not work for you.
I primarily use four types of bans. There are other bans, including AKicks and what not, but I haven't started using them yet. If I need to start using them, I'll update this page.

Bot Ignores
This is the least problematic type of "ban" and isn't really a ban at all. In the past, the bot was hammered by all the triggering, and it kept getting flooded out of the channel. So, the bot was programmed to protect itself from that. If you get ignored, simply wait it out. I cannot change the penalty times, even if it was DALnet's mistake.
Anti-flood Ignore. The bot is programmed to speak only once every TEN seconds. If it tries to reply to people any faster than that, it stands a risk of getting thrown off of DALnet. If you trigger the bot within two seconds of someone else, it will not reply to one of the people triggering. If you were the one ignored, simply wait a bit to make sure it wasn't lag and then try again. (Originally, the anti-flood ignore was 2 seconds, but now it's 10 because DALnet seems to have done something and the bot got K-Lined even on 2 second intervals.)
Excess triggering penalties. The bot is programmed to respond only once every 10 minutes for each person. Please make sure you do not trigger more often than once every 10 minutes. Every time you trigger the bot before the 10 minutes is up, it will refuse to reply to your triggers for another 10 minutes. For example, if you trigger the bot 5 times in a row, it will respond to the first trigger, but then it won't talk to you for 50 minutes, and if you try to trigger once more before the 50 minutes is up, then you have to wait a total of 60 minutes. In the past, some people have triggered so much, they were ignored for hours!
Note that DALnet is often unstable. It may prevent your request from getting through to the bot, and it may prevent the bot's responses from getting back to you. You often can't tell which, so it's generally safest to wait 10 minutes between triggers. Also, DALnet may send back spurious error messages even if the request and answer get through. If you see that, the DALnet server you are on is desynchronized from the bot's DALnet server. If you get a response, you probably don't need to report the error message to the channel ops because I'm afraid there's nothing we can do about it anyways.

Channel Bans
If you type anything other than the trigger in the trigger channel, you will be banned from the channel. This means that you will be prevented from entering the channel and no one (including the bot) will see what you type into the channel. Yes, I know it may be an honest mistake, minor typo, whatever, but it's a necessary precaution, and I really insist on people being very careful with my fragile little machine. The ban list in the channel is limited to 100, and when it fills up (or when there has been a month without anyone asking to be unbanned), I will clear the ban list and re-key the channels. If you get banned from the channel, simply wait for the next cleaning. Do not ask to be unbanned under any circumstances. If you think there was an error, you may report it so we can try to fix it, but do not ask to be unbanned. Asking to be unbanned will earn you a permanent ban (see "Bot Bans" below) and a place on my news page. Also, reporting a "problem" or asking me to double-check on things when you've simply made a typo may earn you a permanent ban too. I accept that there may be problems with DALnet, but I will not accept people wasting my time either because they can't be bothered to scroll up and see their own typing mistakes or because they think they can deceive me. Finally, do not avoid the ban. Obviously, the channel bans are trivially easy to circumvent with the right resources, but the wait time is usually less than a month. Just watch the news for indication of a cleaning before you try to go back into the channel. Avoiding a ban indicates you're just destructively greedy and care nothing for the server, and that makes me very unwilling and unhappy about sharing my resources with you.

IP Bans
If you have the right password and still cannot download from the server, it might be that the Internet is having problems. But, it might also be an IP Ban. IP Bans usually occur because you were "hammering" -- you were trying to open multiple simultaneous connections or you were trying to open connections too quickly (usually because you do not have enough delay between retrying bad passwords). In such cases, you can get unbanned, but you need to prove that you can use your downloading software in such a way that it will not hurt my server. You can tell if you were banned at the IP layer if you point a web browser at the server's address. If you are banned, it will say "You have been banned." If it asks you for a password or gives you a 401, 403, or 404 error, you're probably not banned, so please check other things first. The directions of how to get unbanned are on the banned page. If you have a dynamic IP address, do not simply reboot to get around the ban. Make sure you fix your settings so they won't hammer again. If you reboot to bypass a ban and continue to hammer, I may choose to put in a Bot Ban and I may choose to ban your whole ISP. If I choose to ban your whole ISP, everyone on your ISP will see your nick as the reason why they can't get in...

Bot Bans
A Bot Ban is when you trigger the bot and it response with a message saying that you are banned. It requires me to kill and restart the bot to add or remove bot bans, so I really dislike adding or removing such bans. Reasons you might get a bot ban include...
Site information sharing. If you share any of the information about my site, ask for information via non-approved methods, or even casually discuss my current setup anywhere other than -babble, then go away and never come back. I do not have the resources to share with everyone, and things are set up so that the people who can find their own way here usually possess qualities that make them the type I want to share with. I'm not interested in sharing with random leechers who are just out to find a big, fast anime server, and I'm probably not interested in sharing with your brother or your best friend if they can't find their own way here. But, if there is someone that you think really, really should have access, you can discuss it with me, and I may decide to invite them and send the relevent details (_I_ may share information if I choose -- it's my server after all). In particular, you may _not_ share the following pieces of information to anyone other than the -babble operators (me, Treblinka, or Göring), and even then, verify that they are indeed an operator in -babble before you give the information (to try to prevent sharing the information with impersonators):
The username and password for downloading from the server. Under no circumstances should this ever be shared. Ever. Not with your brother, your roommate, your best friend, and not even with the -babble ops. This password lets the bot control how loaded the server gets. Sharing the password makes the server suffer. In addition to the normal random rotation, the password will change if the server gets overloaded.
The URLs or IP addresses or port numbers of the rules site or the downloading site.
The method of obtaining the information about my server and related pieces. This is the mostly likely piece of information that the -babble ops would ask for to verify that you are allowed in my channels. If you do not answer this question to the best of your ability, you will not be allowed to stay.
The key to either of my channels or the gateway channel. (I know people sometimes casually mention the key to the gateway channel. It's only fine as long as they don't know about my larger server. Since you're here, you know better, and it's no longer okay for you to share it.)
The list from the gateway bot.
More than five full pathnames from the server list. You may mention up to five full pathnames to ask for help with problems downloading or to ask people to verify if files are complete.
The list of forbidden information above is not complete, and other pieces of information may be forbidden. Use common sense. I would like all discussion about the server should take place in -babble, but I recognize that private conversations might be necessary. If you must discuss anything about my server or its related pieces in private conversation, you still may not give or ask for the information listed above, and you must both be in the trigger channel. Any talk at all about the server, its related pieces, or even the existence of any of the pieces in any place other than -babble may get you banned. Please report any violation of this rule.
Leak information withholding. If Göring, Treblinka, or I initiate an interrogation via -babble and you continue to withhold information about how you found out about my server, you may be permanently banned at the bot. If you should decide to provide solid, provable information about how you got in, let me know and I will unban you, but be warned in advance that I will take action against those who leaked the information. Those who share information about my site forfeit their opportunity to download from the site.
Taking advantage of dynamic IPs. A lot of the bans depend on your IP. People with dynamic IPs have an unfair advantage in that they can get a new IP and continue the abuse. If you intentionally use your dynamic IP to continue abuse beyond a ban, you may be banned at the bot layer which has far more flexible pattern matching abilities. Note that this means that hopping IPs when committing a typo in the trigger channel may turn a month-long ban into a permanent ban. Also, if you have a dynamic IP hammering my server, I may choose to ban you at the bot instead of (or in addition to) banning your whole ISP, in which case, you have to prove to me that you figured out how to use your downloading software.
Remember that you must always include your nick, ident, and IP(s) when you e-mail me. If you're e-mailing about a ban, please include exactly what type of ban you are under, and make sure to include the word "ban" in the subject line. As you can see, there are a lot of ways for you to be banned, and it'll take me a long time to find where you were banned if you don't tell me. If you e-mail me without the necessary information, I will simply ignore your message. Also, I'm often very busy. If I haven't replied to your message within a month and you included all the necessary information, try e-mailing me again (with all the necessary information) because that means I probably lost track of your message. It is much easier to follow the rules than to have me unban you, so please be careful and try to not get banned.

(Thanks to Göring for reading over and providing suggestions for this page and for creating the first Bot FAQ back before the bot had its own channels.)

-- Dildo

(this text copy pasted from the site, names and additional data changed at the threat of ban for sharing this information)

Re:The strictest chan ever!! (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941637)

This is the funneist shit I've ever seen.

Oh no! (1)

Mattsson (105422) | about 12 years ago | (#3941488)

Hysteria!!!!
Let's evacuate the planet!
Or maybe *put random Bruce Willis joke here...*

Re:Oh no! (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941503)

/.Mattsson - My native language is not English, so please don't whine over linguistic errors. (That's lame anyway...)

But whining about people whining isn't equally as lame?

Minor linguistic quibble (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941576)

But you shouldn't end sentences with an ellipse...

Oh no, now I've done it! The stupidity is spreading!

Hrm (2, Funny)

ShishCoBob (516335) | about 12 years ago | (#3941493)

Maybe they are just doing this so we all get worried and start to horde gas, food, and other products so the economy comes back.

Re:Hrm (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941513)

That's probably what happened around Y2K. I remember going to a grocery store on New Years Eve and seeing lines from each register stretch all the way down the isles and to the back of the store.

Needless to say, they (the grocery store) probably had one hell of a party that night.

Not quite... (1)

CSZeus (593470) | about 12 years ago | (#3941595)

Yeah... except for the small fact that the economy comes to a dead halt until the idiots realize that we're not going to get hit by a giant rock (which, if they believed it in the first place, could be a very, very long time)

Big boost for space tech if it is on course... (5, Funny)

vkg (158234) | about 12 years ago | (#3941496)

"You have 19 years to do something about a 2km rock headed for Washington. Go!"

Nothing like a crisis to focus the mind, eh?

Re:Big boost for space tech if it is on course... (5, Funny)

brsmith4 (567390) | about 12 years ago | (#3941531)

Lets just hope by then NASA gets its std/metric conversions correct or we're all toast.

Re:Big boost for space tech if it is on course... (4, Funny)

Mad Marlin (96929) | about 12 years ago | (#3941536)

"You have 19 years to do something about a 2km rock headed for Washington. Go!"

16 years and 7 months.

Re:Big boost for space tech if it is on course... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941568)

Now we must find Carmen Sandiego at all costs.. surely she can do something! She stole Haley's Comet, i'm sure she should have no trouble just changing a single 2km asteroid's trajectory.

ACME crimefighting agency, we need you now like never before!!!

Re:Big boost for space tech if it is on course... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941610)

Washington? Maybe Ted Kennedy's ass will absorb most of the impact - if he's still alive.

Sell tickets? (2)

cirby (2599) | about 12 years ago | (#3941641)

Get your reservations in early...

"Palmero Technical Scale"? (1, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941497)

What's that? hm.

I remember at one point in the distant past whenever they used a term in an article it was unlikely anyone would have heard of, like "Palmero Technical Scale", the slashdot editors would put a little [?] box with a link to the appropriate entry on the public collaborative encyclopedia everything2 [everything2.com] . (OK, so everything2 doesn't have an entry on palmero technical scale, but i'm sure it would pretty soon after slashdot linked it :))

Why did slashdot stop doing that? It would eliminate a lot of confused, unnecessary discussion. Did the everything2 people just ask slashdot to stop, or something, because they were sick of getting hordes of slashdotters who would start posting stuff without reading the FAQs directed to them?

terrorist! (3, Funny)

Cardhore (216574) | about 12 years ago | (#3941498)

Mother nature is a terrorist! First the thunderstorms and now the asteroids! What's next? Exploding stars? scary stuff

Mother Nature (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941586)

is a terrorist!!

No time to spare... (1)

Izanagi (466436) | about 12 years ago | (#3941500)

Quick, buy my asteroid insurance!!! HEHE

Oh no! (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941501)

I've been run over by a llama twice this year! Does that mean I should worry?

Finally. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941502)

A solution to global warming, over-population, osama bin-laden, iraq, isreal vs palestine, Microsoft,...etc. all in one small package.

Vegas Odds (2, Funny)

hagar© (115031) | about 12 years ago | (#3941504)

What about the chances of the Asteroid landing on a Llama? I'm taking bets!

NT7 (5, Funny)

cascino (454769) | about 12 years ago | (#3941505)

Well, if Win2k was NT5, and WinXP is NT6, then I suppose it's due time that the next generation NT7 makes it's "impact" on the world.

Re:NT7 (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941538)

no
XP is NT5.1

Re:NT7 (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941625)

Either way whenever it hits the earth it'll be about the time NT7 comes out considering XP is "5.1". Think of the marketing hayday they'd have.

Re:NT7 (1, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941580)

PEOPLE ARE GOING TO GET ANAL RETENTIVE AND SAY NT 5.1 . THOSE ARE THE SAME PEOPLE WHO USE LINUX.

-thank you the managment

Re:NT7 (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941606)

no
those are the same people who have used linux, and found it to be comparible to reheated dinosaur poop.

those who use a real desktop os, know its NT5.1 and not NT anything else. why would a linux user care that its NT6 or NT5.1? i think its the linux users that dont know shit from their own penises.

Nah (2, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941638)

Considering the record they have established lately, I consider it highly unlikely Microsoft will be ready to ship NT 7 by the February 1 2019 date listed in the article.

They will probably just repeat the Windows ME trick, and release "Windows CANDY" in 2019 (so that they could confuse consumers into thinking that that thing MS Marketing had been talking about so long had actually been delivered on), then release the real goods two years later. Rather than the promised 2km asteroid that ends all life on earth, "Windows CANDY" will just be a baseball-sized rock that lands in Ontario, Canada, killing a small boy's pet dog.

So we should be safe from the asteroid until 3rd quarter 2021 at least, at which point it won't matter becuase the UNIX Date Rollover Bug will have plunged the world into anarchy and killed everyone by that time anyway.

Just great... (1)

terradyn (242947) | about 12 years ago | (#3941506)

Now I have to rework my entire schedule... stupid asteroid. A few weeks later and I could have caught Star Trek: The Never Ending Story 2.

The only quote you need... (1)

ShawnDoc (572959) | about 12 years ago | (#3941507)

"The error in our knowledge of where NT7 will be on 1 February 2019 is large, several tens of millions of kms"

Hmmm, I wonder if maybe the BBC is getting ready to produce some sort of television show where an astroid crashed into the earth, and they need to drum up some interest in the topic.

Maybe its a promo for Frather Ted? That show opens up with a meteor or some such crashing onto Craggy Island.

Anyway, I'm not concered.

Re:The only quote you need... (1)

hagar© (115031) | about 12 years ago | (#3941600)

Feck! Drink! Asteroid!

Re:The only quote you need... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941630)

No. They'll put a bunch of people in the same house, place cameras randomly across the home, and see how they react when a giant boulder comes crashing onto their roof.

Greatest reality show ever.

Quick, before it's too late (4, Funny)

knodi (93913) | about 12 years ago | (#3941510)

We need to hurry up and send a team of foul-mouthed perverted semi-illiterate oil miners into space! And for the love of all that's holy, somebody start having sex with Liv Tyler!

Re:Quick, before it's too late (2, Funny)

hondo77 (324058) | about 12 years ago | (#3941551)

And for the love of all that's holy, somebody start having sex with Liv Tyler!

Again? Okay, if it will help save the planet. Hold my calls, I'll be back in a few days...

Re:Quick, before it's too late (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941561)

Well if it's for the good of the country I might as well. I'm a patriot at heart.

Re:Quick, before it's too late (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941566)

somebody start having sex with Liv Tyler!
I'm on it! dang, lost the phonenumber. happens all the time. Denial? Who? Me?

The Sky is Falling (1)

Faulder (242521) | about 12 years ago | (#3941512)

Great. Does anyone else think that this sensational journalism is going hurt funding for things like this when it misses us by 5 million km?

The Mayan calendar (2, Interesting)

dgreene423 (88853) | about 12 years ago | (#3941514)

The Mayan calendar ends on December 21, 2012. If 1. the projections are a bit off as far as the arrival date and 2. it does hit the Earth, I'd say this might be a good reason to end your calendar.

Now we know where Bill Gates came from... (3, Funny)

Quixotic137 (26461) | about 12 years ago | (#3941515)

Those aliens are running NT7 already!

Re:Now we know where Bill Gates came from... (1)

Nashville Guy (585073) | about 12 years ago | (#3941565)

Running NT7? It will take until 2019 to hit because they will need to keep rebooting along the way!

Re:Now we know where Bill Gates came from... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941619)

Nope. They're running Mac OS. Or maybe Win NT Server with Appletalk enabled.

London tabloids (3, Funny)

Picass0 (147474) | about 12 years ago | (#3941519)

Leave it to British tabloits to sensationalize a non-story. Fortunately I never see biased or inacurate stories at this site [slashdot.org] .

Re:London tabloids (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941583)

Strange that. I always assumed that it was the largest publicly-owned news and broadcasting entity in the world.

See it happen! (5, Interesting)

crt (44106) | about 12 years ago | (#3941524)

Check out the 3d view here [nasa.gov] .

Just fast-forward to Feb-1 2019, set the center on earth, and zoom in.

This is really good news and here is why... (1)

matt20 (263551) | about 12 years ago | (#3941526)

I'm sick of watching the stock market sputter and sput. We need something big and beyond our little financial myopia. We need something to unite humanity in a common cause - our survival.

Really, best news I've heard all day!

Re:This is really good news and here is why... (1)

brsmith4 (567390) | about 12 years ago | (#3941592)

I agree. Terrorism united the United States (for a mere 5 minutes). Imaging what a giant asteroid can do...

Why FreeBSD is dying by poopbot (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941528)

Happy Troll Tuesday!

The End of FreeBSD

[ed. note: in the following text, former FreeBSD developer Mike Smith gives his reasons for abandoning FreeBSD]

When I stood for election to the FreeBSD core team nearly two years ago, many of you will recall that it was after a long series of debates during which I maintained that too much organisation, too many rules and too much formality would be a bad thing for the project.

Today, as I read the latest discussions on the future of the FreeBSD project, I see the same problem; a few new faces and many of the old going over the same tired arguments and suggesting variations on the same worthless schemes. Frankly I'm sick of it.

FreeBSD used to be fun. It used to be about doing things the right way. It used to be something that you could sink your teeth into when the mundane chores of programming for a living got you down. It was something cool and exciting; a way to spend your spare time on an endeavour you loved that was at the same time wholesome and worthwhile.

It's not anymore. It's about bylaws and committees and reports and milestones, telling others what to do and doing what you're told. It's about who can rant the longest or shout the loudest or mislead the most people into a bloc in order to legitimise doing what they think is best. Individuals notwithstanding, the project as a whole has lost track of where it's going, and has instead become obsessed with process and mechanics.

So I'm leaving core. I don't want to feel like I should be "doing something" about a project that has lost interest in having something done for it. I don't have the energy to fight what has clearly become a losing battle; I have a life to live and a job to keep, and I won't achieve any of the goals I personally consider worthwhile if I remain obligated to care for the project.

Discussion

I'm sure that I've offended some people already; I'm sure that by the time I'm done here, I'll have offended more. If you feel a need to play to the crowd in your replies rather than make a sincere effort to address the problems I'm discussing here, please do us the courtesy of playing your politics openly.

From a technical perspective, the project faces a set of challenges that significantly outstrips our ability to deliver. Some of the resources that we need to address these challenges are tied up in the fruitless metadiscussions that have raged since we made the mistake of electing officers. Others have left in disgust, or been driven out by the culture of abuse and distraction that has grown up since then. More may well remain available to recruitment, but while the project is busy infighting our chances for successful outreach are sorely diminished.

There's no simple solution to this. For the project to move forward, one or the other of the warring philosophies must win out; either the project returns to its laid-back roots and gets on with the work, or it transforms into a super-organised engineering project and executes a brilliant plan to deliver what, ultimately, we all know we want.

Whatever path is chosen, whatever balance is struck, the choosing and the striking are the important parts. The current indecision and endless conflict are incompatible with any sort of progress.

Trying to dissect the above is far beyond the scope of any parting shot, no matter how distended. All I can really ask of you all is to let go of the minutiae for a moment and take a look at the big picture. What is the ultimate goal here? How can we get there with as little overhead as possible? How would you like to be treated by your fellow travellers?

Shouts

To the Slashdot "BSD is dying" crowd - big deal. Death is part of the cycle; take a look at your soft, pallid bodies and consider that right this very moment, parts of you are dying. See? It's not so bad.

To the bulk of the FreeBSD committerbase and the developer community at large - keep your eyes on the real goals. It's when you get distracted by the politickers that they sideline you. The tireless work that you perform keeping the system clean and building is what provides the platform for the obsessives and the prima donnas to have their moments in the sun. In the end, we need you all; in order to go forwards we must first avoid going backwards.

To the paranoid conspiracy theorists - yes, I work for Apple too. No, my resignation wasn't on Steve's direct orders, or in any way related to work I'm doing, may do, may not do, or indeed what was in the tea I had at lunchtime today. It's about real problems that the project faces, real problems that the project has brought upon itself. You can't escape them by inventing excuses about outside influence, the problem stems from within.

To the politically obsessed - give it a break, if you can. No, the project isn't a lemonade stand anymore, but it's not a world-spanning corporate juggernaut either and some of the more grandiose visions going around are in need of a solid dose of reality. Keep it simple, stupid.

To the grandstanders, the prima donnas, and anyone that thinks that they can hold the project to ransom for their own agenda - give it a break, if you can. When the current core were elected, we took a conscious stand against vigorous sanctions, and some of you have exploited that. A new core is going to have to decide whether to repeat this mistake or get tough. I hope they learn from our errors.

Future

I started work on FreeBSD because it was fun. If I'm going to continue, it has to be fun again. There are things I still feel obligated to do, and with any luck I'll find the time to meet those obligations.

However I don't feel an obligation to get involved in the political mess the project is in right now. I tried, I burnt out. I don't feel that my efforts were worthwhile. So I won't be standing for election, I won't be shouting from the sidelines, and I probably won't vote in the next round of ballots.

You could say I'm packing up my toys. I'm not going home just yet, but I'm not going to play unless you can work out how to make the project somewhere fun to be again.

= Mike

--

To announce that there must be no criticism of the president, or that we are to stand by the president, right or wrong, is not only unpatriotic and servile, but is morally treasonable to the American public. -- Theodore Roosevelt



- posted by poopbot: for all your crapflooding needs

PvPgS18a0q Post #605

Should be divertable (1)

dspeyer (531333) | about 12 years ago | (#3941530)

Obviously we need to check the orbit before we conclude anything, but with this much time to spare we should be able to push it away from us. Even a miniscule change in angle would become a massive change in actual location by the time it came near us, and we only need about 4000 miles. While they don't give an exact number, it will have to travel well over 100 million to reach us.

Probably our best bet (if it is a risk) would be to land an unmanned craft on it the next time it nears earth, then have it burrow it's head into the ground and fire a rocket. It could do lots of scientific tests while it was there, of course. There should be no need for exotica like nuclear bombs.

So, as they said, we have more to fear from llamas (though exploiting irrational fear of the asteroid could get us some interesting scientific data).

Re:Should be divertable (1)

brsmith4 (567390) | about 12 years ago | (#3941639)

I would like to put our rotting stock pile of nukes to good use finally. In fact, it would be beneficial if all countries launch all of their nukes at the same time to obliterate this mofo. Kill two birds with one stone: 1) giant asteroid 2) nuclear weapons. Sounds idealistic, but it'd be cool.

AHHH! (0, Offtopic)

YahoKa (577942) | about 12 years ago | (#3941532)

WERE ALL GONNA DIE!

Remember (5, Informative)

Have Blue (616) | about 12 years ago | (#3941533)

The most important words in the article (well maybe they weren't actually there, but I paraphrase): More data needed. There is still a huge margin of error in the calculation of the asteroid's orbit. It just might hit Earth at this point.

run over by a llama? (4, Funny)

friscolr (124774) | about 12 years ago | (#3941534)

which means it shouldn't bump getting run over by a llama off your list of worries.

well i was caught in a llama stampede when i was younger, so anyone within a 1000 mile radius of me might wanna consider moving...

FUCK YEAH! (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941535)

GAZA CITY, Gaza Strip (AP) - Holding up the flag-wrapped body of a 2-month-old girl, tens of thousands of Palestinians marched Tuesday to bury their dead after an Israeli airstrike killed a top Hamas leader and 14 civilians, including nine children. The Islamic militant group vowed revenge.

Woohoo! 5 terrorists and 9 future terrorists on their way to meet Allah. Fucking raghead goatfuckers. GO ISRAEL!!!

Palermo scale (2)

Wrexen (151642) | about 12 years ago | (#3941539)

For those wondering what they're talking about, NASA has a site about it here [nasa.gov]

Re:Palermo scale (2)

grytpype (53367) | about 12 years ago | (#3941571)

From that site:
Actual scale values less than -2 reflect events for which there are no likely consequences, while Palermo Scale values between -2 and 0 indicate situations that merit careful monitoring. Potential impacts with positive Palermo Scale values will generally indicate situations that merit some level of concern.

So a Palermo Scale value of 0.06 is not a total joke.

A typical slashdot day by poopbot (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941545)

Happy Troll Tuesday!

Credits: anonymous

"Mmmm... this feels good..." I sighed.
"Shhh!" hissed Hemos. "We don't want Mark to come in here!"

True. Having Hemos's 16 year-old brother walk in on us at that moment would not be good. I didn't think he'd be too cool with finding his 12 year-old brother lying naked with me, holding my 11 year-old dick in his hands. But, in all fairness, my hands were eagerly playing with Hemos's dick and balls at that moment, too.

Hemos's mom and dad had gone to the drive-in, leaving his big brother in charge. In our favor, leaving Mark in charge pretty much guaranteed that we weren't to bother him, and in turn, he'd leave us alone unless we were making too much noise or breaking something. Well, we were being careful to keep quiet because we very much wanted to be left alone.

We were in Hemos's twin bed, snuggled under the covers with our underwear pushed down to the foot of the bed. The only illumination in the room came from the faint sliver of light that crept in under his bedroom door. Even in the shadows I could make out the shape of my friend; about my height, but heavier. (Hell, I was such a skinny runt that everyone was heavier than me.) Hemos had a crew-cut of white-blonde hair, and was only starting to sprout some pubic hair. But, you had to feel for it because what little pubic hair he possessed was as blonde as the short hair on his hea and could not yet be seen by even a minimal distance.

And, I was happily feeling for it, running my hands all over Hemos's slightly larger erection and fondling his larger testicles while he courteously stroked my dick. I could tell that he didn't possess the same enthusiasm for cockplay as I did, unless you count his appreciation for the attention devoted to his member. And I knew that my willingness to satisfy his sexual urges was one of the few reasons he even had me sleep over at his place. But, I didn't let that stop me from finding pleasure in the handling of his meat.

I'd recently had an "introduction", of sorts, to seeing what someone could do with a man's dick with their mouth. While spending the night with my Uncle Jerry a couple weeks before, while I watched in secret, I was treated to a visual display of the intensity and unabashed pleasure that my uncle had obviously enjoyed having another man suck on his cock. From that moment on, I had a yearning that I needed to satisfy. With who was my only question.

I guess it was time to find out.

"I... heard that sucking on it feels even better than playing with it." I ventured.

In the darkness, I could feel a slight jerk of revulsion in Hemos's body.

"Put a dick in your mouth?" he croaked.

"Well, " I countered, my heart pounding with anxiety, "I think adults do it all the time."

"Well, I'm not gonna do it!" Hemos hissed. "That's homo stuff!"

"Yeah." I sighed disappointedly, while still playing with Hemos's dick. "I guess it is."

As I stroked his shaft in a steadier, milking rhythm, I could sense Hemos's breaths getting quicker. His manipulations of my dick began to falter as I could feel his body tense beside me. His hips rocked slightly in time with my pumping of his cock, and I cradled his balls tenderly in my other hand. When any attentions to my own dick has completely ebbed, I knew what was about to happen, so I picked up the pace just a bit more while lending a touch more pressure in my grip. Finally, Hemos's breath caught in his throat, and he turned his face fully into his pillow to stifle the moans that broke free as his cock pulsed and throbbed in a dry orgasm within my hands. I continued to massage him and didn't release him from my grasp until his member had gone fully soft.

"Man," sighed Hemos dreamily after finally catching his breath. "You are so good at that, CmdrTaco."

At least I had something to be proud of, I guess, as my friend gently withdrew himself from me and rolled onto his back.

Even though I was only eleven, the irony of Hemos's words and actions were not lost on me. My sucking on him would have been a "homo" thing, but beating him off was okay. Go figure. Within the few moments I had spent mulling over the irony of the thoughts, Hemos had drifted off to sleep. I slipped out from under the covers and down to the cool floor so I could masturbate without shaking the bed. As I toyed with my own dick, I imagined Hemos's cock in my mouth, wondering if the chance would ever really come. Finally, my own climax washed over me, and I got back into the bed.

I don't sleep real well to begin with, and even worse when I'm not in my own bed. And now, with the thoughts of a dick so close to me, as well as the vivid memories of secretly seeing man-to-man cocksucking pleasure floating through my prepubescent, sex-filled brain, I was not about to fall asleep anytime soon. Lying awake until around 11:30, I finally decided that I needed to do something to satisfy my hungers, or I'd never be able to let it rest. The trick was in finding the guts to follow through.

I knew that whenever Hemos fell asleep, he pretty much stayed asleep. So, since he was sleeping soundly, lying on his back, I took a deep breath and gingerly ducked my head under the covers and scooted down as much as I could to the foot of the bed. That put my head right at Hemos's hip level. I raised my head and upper body to help create a tent over his crotch. Sniffing around, I found the faint scent of young penis flesh. I inhaled deeply, both in the love of the scent, and in an attempt to slow my pounding heart. I opened my mouth wide over the area where I sensed Hemos's dick to be, and lowered my mouth squarely over his soft cock and balls until I could feel his sparse pubic hairs tickling my cheek. I finally had a dick in my mouth! I just wasn't sure what I'd do if Hemos woke to find his "homo" friend in this situation.

I remained like that for a long moment, partially in fear of trying anything more, and partly to savor the moment. I carefully let my tongue start to explore his tender penile flesh, enjoying the texture. Then came the excitement that welled within me as his cock began to respond to my attentions and harden in my warm and wet mouth! Butterflies seemed to explode in my stomach and drown out my heartbeat as I felt his dick get to its full size in my mouth. Concentrating in that dark environment, I found myself beginning to identify the shape of his member by taste. The shaft actually seemed to taste different than the head, and the thin skin of his scrotum seemed to harbor another distinct flavor.

I started to softly suck on Hemos's dick, becoming fascinated at how it just seemed to, well, 'fit' in my mouth... how the head lent itself to the back of my tongue, and how the shaft rested between my tongue and the roof of my mouth. My excitement was so great that my own recently satisfied dick was responding again, inviting me to play. I was sucking a cock, and I was in heaven!

However, within seconds, Hemos seemed to get restless. In fear, I quickly pulled my mouth away from Hemos's candy stick and held still. The covers rustled, and pulled back.

"Whatcha doin'?" mumbled Hemos.

"I... uh... was trying to find my shorts down here," I lied, starting to fumble near our feet. Well, partial lie, because it was a good idea to do so, anyway, and now was as good a time as any.

"Oh, yeah," said Hemos. "Get mine, too, willya?"

"S-sure" I stammered, relieved.

I located the two items of clothing and scooted back up towards the head of the bed. Thankfully, our underwear were pretty easy to distinguish since Hemos wore boxers, and I wore briefs. We both fumbled to put them on in the dark, and then settled back into the bed. I lay stiffly on my back, still harboring some fear that my friend discovered more than he let on, but Hemos simply rolled onto his side, facing away from me, and promptly went back to sleep.

And, here I was again, so close to my fantasies, yet still so far.

And very much awake.

After hearing the clock in the hallway chime midnight, I finally got up to go to the bathroom. Figuring it was late enough not to be an issue, and since even if Hemos's parents were home that they would be in their own bedroom downstairs, I didn't bother to slip on my pants for the short trip down the hall. I walked softly to the bedroom door, and then stepped out into the hallway, illuminated dimly by a bare-bulb night light. I walked past big brother Mark's door to the bathroom at the end of the hall and turned on the light as I shut the door.

Peeing into the toilet, I looked up at my reflection in the large mirror and smiled slyly to myself. I actually sucked on a dick, even if for only a moment! At that moment I was Rob Maldo, secret agent double-O-seven, who could sneak in and suck a dick, and sneak away without being caught!

I flushed the toilet and switched out the light as I headed back down the hall. Slipping past Mark's door once again, the door flew open, and a hand covered my mouth while a muscular arm snapped around my waist and drew me into the room. Squirming in the arms of Hemos's athletic older brother was a waste of effort, and he only squeezed harder until I settled down.

"You'll keep quiet if you know what's good for you,' growled Mark into my ear. "You gonna be quiet?"

I nodded. Mark let go of my mouth and reached over to close his bedroom door, the other hand and arm still holding me firmly with my feet off the ground. I heard something click, and recalled, and not without a certain amount of childish fear, that Mark had a lock on his door.

The room had a yellowish glow from the large lava lamp next to Mark's bed. He took me over to the bed and tossed me face down onto it, kneeling next to me. I thought briefly about trying to get up and run, but to where?

When I felt Mark's hands on me again, I was determined to fight him off, but I was no match for him as he flipped me onto my back and straddled me, sitting squarely on my upper chest, his knees pinning my shoulders and my arms locked between his legs. I gazed up at his lean, muscled torso, his stern blue eyes under a tussled mane of reddish-blonde hair. I could feel the soft fabric of his boxers against my chin.

"Can't get up, can ya?" he said, grinning down at me, all snide and victorious.

I struggled a bit, more out of obligation, but knew it was no use. Mark was just too big for me.

"Whatsamatter?" huffed Mark. "You too weak to fight? Or, maybe you just like laying there, sniffing dicks?"

I started squirming a bit harder, but Mark's legs only clamped tighter. At least he had scooted down a bit, and was no longer suffocating me with his weight on my chest.

"Yeah! Maybe you're a homo-boy who just likes sniffing dicks. Maybe you wanna sniff my big dick?"

I didn't care for where this was going, and I wasn't too comfortable with the tone of Mark's voice. But, I was also not being given much of a choice in the matter. Especially when Mark reached into the fly of his boxers and pulled out his cock.

"Here you are, homo-boy... a nice, fresh big-man dick!" grinned Mark fiendishly. "Ain't it a beaut?"

He held it out for me, then leaned forward and started to rub his cock on my face, tracing my cheeks and nose with the bulbous head. His testicles soon followed his dick through the opening, until they were dangling on my chin, the coarse pubes tickling my lips. Their faint musky scent began to fill my nostrils.

"CmdrTaco's just a little dick-faced homo-boy, ain't he?" sneered Mark, sliding his cock across my face. "I saw you in there, your head under the covers. What were you doing? Giving my little brother a blow job?"

I didn't answer. I was at once shocked at the thought of having been discovered, and confused by Mark's remark. I then guessed that he meant sucking a dick was called a 'blow job'. But... you're not blowing, you're sucking, and-

"You were, weren't you, you little homo!"

It was obvious what had happened; that Mark had looked in on us to find my head under the blankets. I thought I had sensed a miniscule change in the light, but assumed that to be part of my excitement. That must have been what woke Hemos up so suddenly.

"So, maybe you aren't just dick-faced, " he said, rubbing his cock on my face again. "Maybe you're a dick sucker!" He leaned forward, mashing his hairy ball sack into my nose, then pulling back to trace my features again with his member. But, even as Mark taunted me, treating his cock as a threatening weapon, there was something else happening.

He was getting a boner.

And as I closed my eyes, I could feel his cock thickening against my face. I could sense the heat of his hardening dick directly on my flesh. And, I found I was enjoying the sensations of this older cock against my face. There would soon be no way of hiding the fact that I was getting excited, too.

"So, dick-sucker-CmdrTaco... you're gonna suck my dick, now."

My eyes sprung open to see Mark's fully erect cock pointing at my face. While it wasn't huge (I had already seen 'huge' with my Uncle Jerry), it was still big enough to scare me.

And excite me to no end.

"Open wide, homo-boy."

Without another moment of hesitation, or taking my eyes off of Mark's sleek tool, I opened my mouth as wide as I could and watched as he leaned down and slid that beautiful cock into my waiting mouth. I then settled my tongue against the bottom half of his shaft while I could feel the upper half press against the roof of my mouth. Its texture was soft, yet hard; smooth, yet distinct.

"There," he sighed. "Now, you have a real dick to suck on. Now, get started, suck-boy!"

It was so much bigger than Hemos's young dick, I wasn't sure if I could get enough suction worked up to suck on it. It was then that I found out what sucking a cock is really all about: friction.

Mark held the base of his dick to guide himself and started to pump into my mouth, sliding his dick in and out of my salivating lips. He would slip in precariously between my teeth until he was near to choke me, then pull back out until the base of the bulbous head was just close to popping free from my lips, held in place by the suction of my mouth. Then he... we... would do it all over again... over and over... and gloriously over again.

"Oh, you are good, CmdrTaco," he moaned softly. "You suck cock real good."

I don't know about that; it seemed he was doing all the real work. But, I wanted it to be good. I wanted to have this dick in my mouth. And I wanted it again and again. I was definitely enjoying the oral sensations as his near-adult dick worked back and forth in my hungry mouth, and I wanted so much to please him so he would want my mouth again.

Mark placed his other hand on the top of my head to steady me as his thrusts became a little more erratic. His breath quickened, and I could sense that he was trying hard not to ram himself all the way down my throat and choke me. He was making little grunts with each thrust, and I could feel his dick turn to stone in my mouth when, in a mix of fear and excitement, I suddenly recalled what would happen next.

"Oh, baby... oh, fuck..."

Mark's movements got all quick and jerky. I was almost afraid to breathe.

"OHHHH!!!" he moaned, pulling out of my mouth and letting loose with a burst of white goo that seemed to splatter all over as he pumped his dick with his fist. My head still held firmly in his other hand, the warm liquid flew partly into my still open mouth, and all over my nose and eyebrows. I swallowed briefly, not sure whether to gag or hope for more, tasting fully the salty and musky liquid, then opened my mouth once more as Mark stuck his creaming cock back in and worked the thick fluid throughout my young mouth.

I sucked until Mark went soft and withdrew his spent dick. He smiled down at me, obviously proud of what he had done. He finally got off of me (good thing since I thought my arms were going to fall off) and stood there for a moment, an interesting picture with his hands on his hips, and his drained cock and balls hanging out of the fly of his plaid boxers. I just lay there with his juices clinging to my skin, wanting to do it all over again.

Mark bent down and picked up a t-shirt, and proceeded to wipe the remainder of his goo off my face. Finished with that, he tossed the shirt into a hamper and walked over to his bedroom door to unlock it as he tucked his manhood back into his underwear.

"You better get back into Hemos's bed before mom and dad find you here," he said softly.

I reluctantly got off Mark's bed and walked to the door. As I was about to exit, he reached out to stop me briefly.

"You liked that, didn't you, homo-boy?"

I nodded, not sure where he was going with this inquiry.

"Your first taste of cum?"

I shrugged, then nodded again.

"If you're good, maybe I'll let you suck my dick again some time, CmdrTaco. Now, get your ass out of here before I kick it."

I stepped out of the room and felt the door close harshly behind me. I could still taste traces of Mark's cum in my mouth, could still sense the friction of his cock on my tongue. I smiled in remembrance.

I was hooked.

- posted by poopbot: who doesn't like scat?

IxgAXJoPbe Post #606

And you thought NT 3.51 was bad? (3, Funny)

descubes (35093) | about 12 years ago | (#3941546)

It keeps getting worse and worse. NT5 had an estimated 65000 bugs, if I recall correctly, but at a few grams per bug (when they don't fly), nobody cared about such a tiny mass. But now NT7 would be large enough for continental scale devastation? Wow. That must be a serious number of bugs.

On the other hand, announcing a product 17 years before it hits, come on, that's not really serious, even by NT's standards.

You think you know about programming? [sf.net]

Death to America? (0)

Haxx (314221) | about 12 years ago | (#3941547)


If this turns out to be a real threat,
I'll bet that the parts of the world
that hate us and our technology will change thier tune slightly.

Please save us oh great infidel!

Oh great (1)

geekboy911 (584404) | about 12 years ago | (#3941552)

Just wait till the local media gets ahold of this and runs with it. I can see the headlines now, "Giant Asteroid on Collision Course with Earth!" "2km Rock Headed for Earth" *sigh*

What if it could be captured? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941554)

What if it could be captured in orbit about the Earth?

More than enough material to make a really good space station! :)

The trick is... (1)

dethlejd (71126) | about 12 years ago | (#3941558)

getting it to land on the right continent...

You choose, I'm not that brave...

- Jim

You mean this NT7? (5, Informative)

whatnotever (116284) | about 12 years ago | (#3941559)

2002 NT7 Impact Risk [nasa.gov]

It doesn't look so bad. -0.14 on the Palermo Scale (recently downgraded?).

Re:You mean this NT7? (1)

Ed Hacker (86911) | about 12 years ago | (#3941575)

I think that's Windows NT 7.0, actually.

Hooray! (3, Funny)

Ed Hacker (86911) | about 12 years ago | (#3941560)

I told my cow orkers not to worry about the unix signed 32-bit int date problem! Ha-hahahaha, I love being right! Oh, wait a minute...

a moral imperative (2)

ryusen (245792) | about 12 years ago | (#3941562)

I guess in about 17 years it'll be time to ask that girl if she'll sleep with me if the world was about to end...

Re:a moral imperative (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941629)

Pft. You're going to wait 17 years? Pick an earlier day of armageddon, man. Ever read all that crazy shit about Planet X? That one's supposed to be due next summer.

Geeks helping geeks [get some ass].

Re:a moral imperative (5, Funny)

mbadolato (105588) | about 12 years ago | (#3941634)

I guess in about 17 years it'll be time to ask that girl if she'll sleep with me if the world was about to end

and won't *you* feel like shit if she still says no? ;-)

latest info (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941569)

for the latest information

http://neo.jpl.nasa.gov/risk/2002nt7.html

Slashdot has confirmed:PWP is dying by poopbot (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941570)

Happy Troll Tuesday!

Yet another crippling bombshell hit the beleaguered trolling community when recently Slashdot confirmed that, after several changes were made to production Slashcode, wide posts account for less than a fraction of 1 percent of all Slashdot posts. Coming on the heels of the latest verions of IE which make page-widening more difficult, this news serves to reinforce what we've known all along. the wide posts that we love are collapsing into the narrow posts that we are used to, as further exemplified by the lack of Slashbots complaining about difficulty reading Slashdot's articles.

You don't need to be a Klerck to predict PWP's future. The hand writing is on the wall: PWP faces a bleak future. In fact there won't be any future at all for PWP because PWP is dying. Things are looking very bad for PWP. As many of us are already aware, PWP continues to be defeated by users with thresholds of 1 or higher. Mod points flow like a river of blood. Klerck's PWP-bot posts are the most endangered of them all, having been filtered early on because of their uniformity.

Let's keep to the facts and look at the numbers.

PWP leader Klerck states that there are 7 wide posts in the average Slashdot article. How many non-wide crapflood posts are there? Let's see. The number of crapflood versus wide posts on Slahdot is roughly in ratio of 5 to 1. Therefore there are about 7*5 = 35 non-wide crapflood posts in every Slashdot article. Tacosnotting posts on Slashdot are about half of the volume of crapflood posts. Therefore there are about 17 tacosnotting posts per article. A recent article put Goatse.cx trolls at about 80 percent of total troll posts. Therefore there are a hell of a lot of homosexual trolls. This is consistent with the number of Goatse.cx Slashdot posts.

But Slashdot is only part of the picture. Due to the troubles at Slashdot, negative revenue and so on, the site will soon go out of business and many users will flock to alternative weblogs, where PWP is almost completely unknown. Trollaxor.com, the popular troll hangout, is also dying, its corpse sodomized in yet another Greek bath house.

All major surveys show that PWP has steadily declined in the scope of all troll posts. PWP is very sick and its long term survival prospects are very dim. If PWP is to survive at all it will be among Blog faggot using outdated versions of Slashcode. PWP continues to decay. Nothing short of a miracle could save it at this point in time. For all practical purposes, PWP is dead.

- posted by poopbot: because we're all crapflooders at heart

6Aws0i3Eiy Post #607

Don't worry about it... (0, Redundant)

Toasty16 (586358) | about 12 years ago | (#3941574)

I'm sure that even if we didn't detect this thing until it's on a collision course with earth with only 18 days until impact, we can still train a motley crew of cowboy deap sea oil drillers to operate a spacecraft which will land on the asteroid itself and drill a hle into which they can plant a nuclear device which will fail to remotely detonate, thereby causing a fracas in which one of the crew members will sacrifice his life for the sake of humanity, all while trading pithy qups with his hardboiled crewmembers. Oh man. Well, we all gotta die, right? I'm the guy who gets to do it saving the world.

It will be a close one. (1)

md17 (68506) | about 12 years ago | (#3941581)


"The error in our knowledge of where NT7 will be on 1 February 2019 is large, several tens of millions of kms,"

In other news, today there was 1 in 1 X 10^43 chance that you and your anti-matter self would meet. What a close call. Please be on the look out for your anti-matter self.

Why isnt the world testing deflection technology? (2)

t0qer (230538) | about 12 years ago | (#3941582)

I find it strange that there is almost 1/2 million geeks on slashdot, yet none of them have ever brought this up on these Near earth orbit stories.

Has there ever been any contingouncy planning made in case something like this does happen? Or is it all being kept a secret from the general population (i.e. only 100 of those grey alien ufo's for escape)

A company that did real work into this issue could stand to make a killing. Anyone that figured out a real nice way to make these NEO rocks bounce, blow up, deflect, time phase shift, or tractor away from the earth could pull some mass patents on that and laugh all the way to the bank.

People used to say if man was meant to fly he would have wings. Well, if man was meant to blow up space rocks he would have nukes, and he does.

A important suggestion (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941587)

Among the various ways that the Apostle Paul describes the relationship of the New Testament saint to the law is included the phrase hupo nomon ("under law"). The phrase is unique to Paul and its theologically significant occurrences are found in Romans and Galatians, where it is used-to describe the following: (1) a dominion under which one may live as opposed to grace and which holds one under the rule of sin (Rom. 6:14-15); (2) an earlier epoch of redemptive history which served a divinely-appointed function before faith came (Gal. 3:23); (3) the realm under which Christ was born with the stated purpose of redeeming those in that same "under law" position because such a position was one where the full privileges of sonship could not be realized (Gal. 4:4-5); (4) the realm from which an individual is automatically excluded if the leading of the Holy Spirit is a reality (Gal. 5:18). In view of the content that Paul invests in this phrase, it is not hard to see how it was incomprehensible to him that someone would want to return to the bondage of an "under law" position (Gal. 4:21). The phrase occurs in only one other passage in the New Testament, I Cor. 9:20. There it describes a realm which dictated and defined an observably different life-style, i.e., the outward piety of Jewish ceremonialism, which Paul had the liberty to defer to when taking the gospel into the context of the Jews' religion.

One can readily see from the occurrences of this phrase that the cumulative thrust is pronouncedly negative. Ridderbos has observed this same connotation in the phrase. He says:

This whole negative significance ... which the law has for man and which makes him live in a condition of slavery, Paul expresses in the set phrase "to be under the law"... Although this expression is used with nuances, it denotes in the passages that are characteristic for the present connection not merely that God has subjected man to the norm of the law, but rather that he lives, groans, has been put in chains as a prisoner, a slave, one who is underage, under the hostile, enslaving power of the law; a bondage from which only the regime of divine grace can deliver him (Rom. 7:14; 8:2; Gal. 4:5).1

Thus, it would be fair to characterize this phrase as one that Paul employs to deliver a sustained and emphatic attack on the religion of law from which the Damascus road encounter had delivered him. Because such language is an overstatement in the mind of some, it will be the purpose of this chapter to study this phrase more carefully, giving special attention to its occurrence in ?.cm. 6:14-15, with a view to elucidating the contribution that it makes to the understanding of the redemptive-historical shift from the Old Covenant to the New Covenant.

"Hupo Nomon" in Romans 6:14-15

1. Paul and the Stoic-Cynic Diatribe

Since Rudolph Bultmann first argued in 1910 that Paul in the earlier chapters of Romans made use of a literary device known as the Stoic-Cynic diatribe, many commentators have explained the form of Rom. 6:1-7:25 by an appeal to such a device. The supposed form of the diatribe, barn of a Socratic tradition, was the arrangement of material around a question-answer format, and since the questions were stylistically engendered, dictated by the diatribe form itself, the "opponents" which seem to be in view are more imaginary than real.2 So it is thought that the questions of Rom 6:1, 15; 7:7, 13 represent opponents that Paul has created for the sake of surfacing leading implications in his thought and advancing his argument. However, recent studies have begun to question the use of such a rhetorical genre in Romans. For example, in 1974 Karl Donfried, after reviewing Bultmann's research and lining it up against the work of several eminent classicists, concluded that what Bultmann had shown was not that Paul had been influenced by the diatribe form, but that he was influenced only by rhetorical patterns which were common and widespread in the Graeco-Roman world. Therefore, to deny that Romans could be addressed to a specific situation or envision specific opponents because it utilized such patterns was incorrect.3 In fact, Donfried continues,

Similar rhetorical influences appear in Gal. and in the Corinthian correspondence, yet Paul, in these letters, is addressing himself to a specific set of problems which he hopes to solve. The point, then, is that one should be most careful in objecting to the "specificity" of Romans in dealing with live issues in Rome on the basis of a supposed influence of the diatribe ... 4

Donfried goes on to point out that it has yet to be established that there even exists such a diatribe form. In the words of one classicist, the Stoic-Cynic diatribe is "a kind of literary counterpart to the redeemed-redeemer myth of the History of Religions school...It is a ghost summoned up for lack of a more adequate explanation of what confronts us ... It is not at all clear that it has any claim to exist, especially at this period... "5 So Bultmann's conclusions were too specific, and more than the evidence could bear.

Appealing to the evidence that may be gleaned from the New Testament itself regarding the Judaizing opponents that Paul continually battles, it is far simpler to see Paul in Romans taking real Jewish objections repeatedly directed against aspects of his teaching, and sifting, collating, and arranging them in a logical and coherent pattern, for the purpose of using them to accentuate the truth as it is in Christ. As a matter of fact, since each question in chapters 6 and 7 begins with the inferential particle oun, these four question-answer units should be viewed in some sense as logically growing out of each other, which in turn means that these chapters should be studied as a unit.

2. The Thematic Structure of Romans 6:1-7:6

It is important to remember that Paul's perspective, in Romans is redemptive-historical. This fact becomes no more apparent than in Rom. 5:12-21, where Paul develops a contrast between the old age and the new age around mankind's two representative heads -- Adam and Christ. The old aeon began when through the transgression of the one man, Adam, sin entered (eiserchomai) into the world and death through sin. Then later the law entered in alongside (pareiserchomai) in order to multiply the presence of transgression. So the two fundamental realities of the old aeon were sin and law, and it was characterized as an age where "sin reigned in death" (5:21). By contrast, the new age in Christ is marked by the powerful intrusion and superabounding reign of grace through righteousness unto eternal life (5:15, 17, 20- 21).

Paul's reference to the rule of sin and law in the Adamic aeon is amplified in chapters 6-7. In chapter 6, the reign of grace is declared to deliver from the dominion of sin, sin as a tyrannically ruling force. In chapter 7, the reign of grace is set forth as delivering from the dominion of the law. Consequently, the relationship of chapter 5 to chapters 6-7 functions at the level of a rehearsal of what has happened in redemptive history, and not simply and superficially at the level of justification (ch. 5) and sanctification (ch. 6-7) as these chapters are usually approached. From this standpoint, chapters 6-7 follow quite naturally from chapter 5 as the more specific development of features of the life in the new age in Christ, life whose reference point is the inaugurated eschatology which began in the epiphany of Christ.6 Paul is amplifying what it means to live under the reign of grace.

As has been pointed out, Paul draws out the implications of this new life in Christ by means of answering particular Jewish objections. In surveying the thematic structure of 6:1-7:6, in the interests of space and visual clarity, the material will be presented in conjunction with an outline.

Freedom from the Dominion of Sin and the Law:
The Thematic Structure of Rom. 6:1-7:6

I. First Question - Answer Cycle 6:1-14

A. The Question 6:1

The first question grows out of Paul's presentation of justification within the context of the statement, "where sin abounded, grace abounded all the more" (5:20). The verbs express in the clearest manner the triumph of grace over sin. The question then comes: "Are we not able, or even obliged, by the logic of justification, to continue in sin, in order that we might give divine grace as much opportunity as possible to display itself? Greater sinning seems to be the necessary prerequisite of greater grace."7

B. The Answer 6:2-14

1. In Summary 6:2

Paul responds with me genoito ("May it never be!), and then follows with his own question: "How shall we who died to the dominion of sin continue to live in its realm?"

2. In Detail 6:3-14

The conjunction "or" opening vs. 3 suggests that believers who would reason in the manner of vs. 1 may not have an adequate enough grasp of the character of their new life in Christ to be impacted by Paul's counter-response in vs. 2. The sense seems to be: "Or is it the ease that you do not realize the basis of my response in vs. 2?"

a. The Central Proposition: God has positionally united us with Christ's death and resurrection, and thereby moved us into the new age, where we may walk in newness of life. 6:3-4

b. The Development of the Proposition 6:5-10

Paul develops the proposition in two cycles:

1) What does it mean to be united with Christ's death? 6:S-7

"If..." 6:5
"Knowing..." 6:6
"For..." 6:7

(2) What does it mean to be united with Christ's resurrection?

"If..." 6:8 "
Knowing..." 6:9
"For ... " 6:10

At this point, it may be noted that Paul's mention of the "old man" in vs. 6 establishes a link with chapter 5. The "old man" is best defined as all that we are in Adam. Paul affirms that the crucifixion of this "old man" with Christ is necessary to removal from the bondage of sin. In this connection, Kasemann observes: "The ending of bondage is movement into the freedom of the new aeon and is possible only in the dominion of the Crucified."8

c. The Application 6:11 Houtos kai ("Even so")

Paul enjoins his readers to count it a reality that, having been united with Christ's death, they are dead to the dominion of sin, and, having been united with His resurrection, they are alive to God. This death followed by life, old followed by new, sequence suggests that God has ordained that the conversion of each of His elect is a picture in miniature of the grand movement in redemptive history from Adam to Christ, from death to life, from the old age to the new. This sequence is well illustrated by John Stott:

Our biography is written in two volumes. Volume one is the story of the old man, the old self, of me before my conversion. Volume two is the story of the new man, the new self, of me after I was made a new creation in Christ. Volume one of my biography ended with the judicial death of the old self ... Volume two my biography opened with my resurrection. My old life having finished, a new life to God has begun ... We are to keep saying to ourselves, 'Volume one has closed. You are now living in volume two. It is inconceivable that you should reopen volume one. It is not 9 impossible, but it is inconceivable.'

d. The Conclusion 6:12-14

(1) The Exhortation 6:12-13

The oun ("therefore") suggests that the imperatives are the reasonable ethical conclusion growing out of 6:1-11. The commands emphasize the utter inappropriateness of sin in the life of the saint. He has been delivered from the old Adamic position where sin reigned. Therefore, it is inconceivable that he would permit sin to continue its reign in the body (vs.12), which means more specifically (vs. 13) reverting at critical moments to the way one acted before his conversion in yielding the members of his body to the service of sin. To do such is to sin against the new position in the new age.

The implication in the command, "Do not let sin reign in your mortal body," seems to be that the mortal body which has not yet experienced redemption (Rom 8:23), is the only place where the reign of sin can continue to assert itself. Yet even that sphere of rule can be broken by the faith appropriation of the deliverance inherent in the union with Christ. The tension reflected in the commands of vss. 12-13 only indicates that the believer currently lives between inaugurated eschatology and realized eschatology in that he has experienced the first-fruits of his redemption but not the final consummation of his redemption. As Bandstra says, "the present existence of the Christian is characterized by this tension of 'already' and 'not yet'... " 10

(2) The Basis 6:14

The statement in vs. 14 provides the necessary encouragement to engender continued obedience to the commands of vss. 12-13. The statement looks back to chapter 5 and takes up again the crucial terms "sin," "law," and "grace" nestled together in 5:20-21. Paul is drawing off the redemptive-historical truth of those earlier vss., and stating it here in terms of its experimental value to the believer in his remaining struggle with sin. Essentially, Paul says that the law, as the realm where sin asserts its mastery and is irresistibly strong has been replaced in the movement of redemptive history with grace, the realm where the power of sin to subjugate has been stripped away, leaving it weak and making victory over it now certain. In this way, the statement is designed to be an encouragement to the believer that victory is the sure expectation, the rule and not the exception.

II. Second Question - Answer Cycle 6:15-7:6

A. The Question 6:15

While the questions in 6:15 and 6:1 are similar, in that they seek in some way either to justify sin in the life of the Christian, or to demonstrate that such is the direction and end of Paul's theology, they are distinct in the following way. The expression "continue in sin" (epimenomen te hamartia) in vs. 1 uses a present tense verb suggesting the continued, unbroken, unbridled accumulating of sin as a means of bringing about the increase of grace. It views sin cumulatively and aggregately. By contrast, in v. 15 the aorist tense form of the verb hamartano bearing the sense, "shall we commit an act of sin," views sin individually. The thought seems to be, "Is any sin now rendered permissible in view of the absence of the law as a regulative standard to define sin?"

B. The Answer 6:16-7:6

Paul's answer divides the question into two parts, and then deals with each in turn. He answers the "Shall we sin" portion of the question in 6:16-23, and then turns attention to the "because we are not under law but under grace" portion of the question in 7:1-6. It should be noted further that each portion of the answer begins the same way:

"Do you not know..." 6:16 "or do you not know..." 7:1

1.In answer to the first part of the question, Paul affirms that the entrance into grace carries with it a new bondage and a new obedience. Grace is not without standards, but, interestingly enough, Paul does not trace the standards to the law but to apostolic teaching. Paul commends his readers because they became obedient from the heart to that form of teaching to which they were committed (6:17). "Form of teaching" (tupon didaches) is one of several New Testament expressions indicating the systematization of Christian truth into an organized pattern. Cf. also "the teaching (singular) of the apostles (plural)," Acts 2:42; "the words of the faith and good doctrine" I Tim. 4:6; "the pattern of sound words," II Tim. 1:13; "sound doctrine (teaching), II Tim. 4:3; Tit. 1:9; "the faith once for all delivered to the saints," Jude 3; "the traditions," I Cor. 11:2. Moreover, the expression "to which you were committed" carries through the image of slavery and indicates that Christians, as slaves of righteousness were handed over to a body of teaching, and thus it became their moral authority, and the mold to which their conduct should conform.11 But in that it was received from the heart, the bondage that this apostolic teaching imposed was a service of perfect freedom. Kasemann says: "Christian obedience is not to be equated with obedience under the Torah, for as standing in grace it is also freeedom."12

2. In answer to the second part of the question, Paul further explains the believer's liberation from the law (7:1-4), establishes that it is not the absence of the law that promotes sin but its presence (7:5), and removal from the "under law" position is, in fact, the necessity if one is to serve God in "newness of the spirit and not in oldness of the letter" (7:6).

3. An Exegetical Focus on Romans 6:14

H.P. Liddon has observed that Rom. 6:14 is of decisive importance in Paul's argumentation in Romans and governs what follows all the way through chapter 8.13 While it be difficult to extablish direct exegetical bearing that far removed from the statement itself, it certainly does not overstate the case that Rom. 6:14 establishes a concept that is pivotal riot only in Romans but in all of Pauline thought as well.

As already noted, the specific function of the statement in the context is as an encouragement and an incentive to continue in obedience to the commands of vss. 12-13. The statement itself is composed of a promise and an undergirding fact insuring the reality of that promise. The fact that the promise is stated in the future tense does not mean it is a blessing reserved for the future, but simply that when the commands will be obeyed, this is the divine certainty on which the believer may depend.

The most significant exegetical problem confronted in the verse is the meaning of the word "law." Does the word refer to law in general, law as a principle; or does it refer specifically to the mosaic law of the Old Testament? John Murray decides the question in these words:

"Law" in this case must be understood in the general sense of law as law.. That it is not to be understood in the sense of the Mosaic law as an economy appears plainly from the fact that many who were under the mosaic economy were the recipients of grace and in that regard were under grace, and also from the fact that relief from the mosaic law as an economy does not of itself place persons in the category of being under grace. Law must be understood, therefore, in much more general terms of law as commandment.14
However, there are several reasons for questioning Murray's position. First of all, as already observed, it is most likely that Paul's vocabulary in 6:14 draws off the previous occurrences of "sin," "law," and "grace" in Rom 5:20-21. If this be the case, then there is a heightened possibility that "law" in 6:14 refers to the Mosaic law, for as Murray himself admits, the term "law" in 5:20 "cannot reasonably be taken in any other way than the law as revealed by Moses."15 The explanation of the term is made much easier if it is seen as coming from chapter 5, and, along with the parallel references to sin and grace in the same context, is fashioned into a statement that articulates the relationship of the believer in present union with Christ to the great redemptive-historical realities summarized in 5:20-21. By contrast, Murray's position requires an abrupt shift in the meaning of the term from previous usage, and its introduction into a context (Rom. 6:1-13) that contains no ostensible reason for its sudden appearance. So his position does not, in the writer's opinion, contribute to the flow of Paul's argument, and the maintaining of the close and important link between chapters 5 and 6.

A second objection to Murray's position is that Paul never uses the phrase "under law" in the way that Murray suggests. Paul consistently uses the phrase hupo nomon in reference to the Mosaic lawcovenant, and there is no reason to make an exception to that rule in Rom. 6:14.

Thirdly, the following context supports a reference to the Mosaic law in 6:14. Paul's emphatic announcement "you are not under law, but under grace" is picked up by the objector in 6:15, and, as already noted, Paul answers the "not under law" portion of the objection in 7:1-6. In these verses it is clear that the apostle is thinking in terms of the Mosaic law-covenant by his reference to the marriage covenant as an illustration of a lifetime bond (7:2-3), and by the climax he reaches in contrasting the newness of the Spirit and the oldness of the letter (7:6). Paul, on the three occasions that he uses the letter/Spirit contrast, employs the word gramma ("letter") to refer to the Mosaic law-covenant (Rom. 2:26; 7:6; 2 Cor. 3:6), and the oldness/newness contrast clearly characterizes the old and new covenants, which are described by the adjective form of these same nouns (II Cor. 3:6, 10.16

Taken together, these arguments constitute strong support for the identification of law in Rom 6:14 with the Mosaic law-covenant. Murray misses the point when he says that many under the Mosaic economy were the recipients of grace. No one argues that the grace of God made a powerful visitation into the hearts of God's Old Testament elect, but the issue in this entire context is rather what was God's redemptive-historical purpose in bringing in the law. Paul says in 5:20 that it was to increase transgression, and drawing from that purpose, the result of being "under law" in 6:14, therefore, is the intensified, unmitigated dominion of sin. Likewise, Murray misses the point when he says that "relief from the Mosaic law as an economy does not of itself place persons in the category of being under grace." Paul is arguing in the context that the new age has arrived, and the New.Covenant is now in force. He does not argue in the passage: you are removed from under law; therefore, you are under grace. Instead he says, you have taken a position under grace; therefore, you are not under law. His starting point is the new position in the new age.

Using the word "law" uniformly from 5:20-7:6 to refer to the Mosaic law-covenant, Paul is then saying in 6:14 that in keeping with the divine purpose of the law to increase transgression, to be "under law" is to be under a covenant that incites sin and intensifies its tyranny.,,,, So Paul has added in 6:14 a word of clarification which prevents the continued misreading of his statement in 5:20, "where sin abounded, grace superabounded. "The point of those words was not to suggest that we should increase our sinning in order to increase the display of grace (6:1), but rather that the power of grace breaks the rule of sin, even when the law has been brought in which becomes the strength of sin (I Cor. 15:56), and in fact seems to strengthen it to a point of impregnability. In the worst of cases, with the reign of sin at its peak because of the base of operation given it by the law, grace has come and vanquished the kingdom of sin and reduced it to no more than a rebellious vassal in the experience of the Christian. Its reign has been terminated, and the believer can approach his duty of obedience with optimism and the positive expec- tation that it can and will be realized. There is no room for a "defeatist mentality" in Rom. 6:14.

4. The Letter/Spirit Contrast

Since Paul uses the letter/spirit contrast to elucidate the law/ grace contrast, the consideration of one necessitates a consideration of the other. The locus classicus for the development of the former is II Cor. 3 where Paul unfolds the ministry of the New Covenant.

This entire chapter is part of an extended apologia which Paul undertook to write because his authority and claim to be an apostle of Jesus Christ was being challenged. Paul opens the chapter by questioning whether he needed any letters of recommendation establishing his identity and credentials because he already had the most complimentary letter that could be written in the transformed lives of the Corinthians. That letter was the surest evidence of the power of Christ operative in his ministry. So the Corinthians themselves were the strongest testimony to the validity of his apostleship (cf. I Cor. 9:2).

Paul's statement in vs. 3 is very significant from a redemptivehistorical standpoint. The Corinthians were being visibly manifested as a letter authored by Christ written, as the apostle faithfully carried out his ministry to them, not with ink but "with the mystical imprint of the Spirit of the living God."17 Hodge observes: "Any man could write with ink; Christ alone can write with the Spirit of God."18 Furthermore, the place of the writing is, not on tablets of stone, but on tablets of living human hearts. The multiple references to the prophecy of the New Covenant are clear (Jer. 31:33; Ezek 11:19; 36:26), and have been recognized by virtually all commentators. However, it seems that the truth implicit in this text may be expanded further.

Bruce K. Waltke has recently suggested a hermeneutical principle which he terms "the canonical process approach." He explains and illustrates the hermeneutic in these words: ... the exegete must make a conscious attempt to trace the progressive development of the text's meaning as the canon containing it grew. As the text's literary parameters expanded its meaning became more full and precise. With regard to this dimension of exegetical study, often overlooked by those schooled in the grammatico-historical approach, a student should ask of Psalm 2, for example, what this coronation liturgy meant during the First Temple when David's sons were installed on Mount Zion to rule over God's kingdom? What did it mean during the Second Temple when the Old Testament canon took its final shape and when there was no king in Israel? And what does it mean in the New Testament when Jesus Christ fulfilled the psalm's vision and assumed his throne in the heavenly Mount Zion (Acts 4:23-27-, 13:32-33; 1:3-5; 12:22-24)?19

If this writer may venture to restate this hermeneutic more explicitly from a redemptive-historical standpoint, it might say the following: the meaning of a given text of Scripture (and the vocabulary in that text) must, in varying degrees, be viewed as dynamic and capable of shifts in emphasis, expansion, contraction, and modification as God's redemptive revelation grew; moreover, that meaning did not mature into its full and complete expression until redemptive revelation reached its climax in the coming of Christ and the subsequent witness to Christ in apostolic writings.

Now if this approach is applied to II Cor. 3:3 it yields some interesting conclusions. Aside from the fact that the New Testament church becomes the recipient and beneficiary of the new covenant, two other conclusions more pertinent to our present study stand out.

1.

Christ becomes the Yahweh of Jer. and Ezek. who fulfills the promise of writing law upon the heart and putting the Spirit within.
2.

The law that is written is apostolic teaching set down in the New Testament. If Christ is the author of the handwriting on the heart; the "My law" of Jer. 31:33 becomes the law of Christ, not the Mosaic Torah. This is not to say that the law of Christ opposes the Mosaic Torah. For, as shown at the end of chapter one, the relationship between the law of Christ and the law of Moses cannot be summed up in any one word. There is a mix of continuity and discontinuity which Christ must be allowed to define, since He is the one who does the writing on the heart.

Moving further into the chapter, Paul uses the gramma/pneuma ("letter/Spirit") contrast in vs. 6 to summarize in one word the essence of each covenant. H.A.W. Meyer brings out the significance of these one word abstracts:

Gramma characterizes the Mosaic covenant according to the specific manner in which it occurs and subsists, for it is established and fixed in writing (by means of the written letter), and thereby--although it is divine, yet without bringing with it and communicating any principle of inward vital efficacy--settled as obligatory. On the other hand, pneuma characterizes the Christian covenant, in so far as its distinctive and essential mode of existence consists in this, that the divine living power of the Holy Spirit is at work in it; through this and not through a written instrument, it subsists and fulfills itself. 21

This contrast is elaborated in vss. 7-18 where Paul attempts to show by a midrashic use of Exod. 34:29-35 the superiority of the new covenant to the old.22 The key words drawn from, Exod. 34 and used in this inspired midrash are doxa ("glory") and kalumma ("veil"). He expounds the word "glory" in vss. 7-11, and then moves to the word "veil" in vss. 12-15. The exposition of these terms prepares the way for his citation of Exod. 34:34 in vs. 16 which is the key sentence in the apostle's argumentation from this Old Testament text.23

Paul shows in his exposition of the word "glory" in vss. 7-11 that the fading doxa of Moses' face symbolizes the fading doxa of the old covenant, thus indicating its usefulness in God's plan was temporary. He employs a three-fold use of the a fortiori argument ("much more" 8,9,11) in establishing the permanent, non-transitory character of the new covenant.

He then takes up the second word, kalumma ("veil"), in vss. 12-15. The oun ("therefore") opening this paragraph in vs. 12 indicates that Paul in his exposition of this word "veil" is building on the ground he established in vss. 7-11. Having the sure hope of the permanent glory of the new covenant (vs. 11), Paul says, "we use great boldness in our speech" (vs 12). At first glance, the contrast of Paul's bold speech (vs. 12) and Moses' veiled face (vs. 13) appears to be a mismatch. But W. C. van Unnik has shown that the word "boldness" (parresia) was taken over as a loan-word into Aramaic and was used there synonymously with the phrase "to uncover the face or head". So barefacedness and boldness were synonymous ideas.24 Thus, Moses speaking to Israel with a veiled face contrasted the openness confidence, and freedom of speech that Paul had. Paul's great boldness and confidence of speech may have been linked to the realization that in speaking the words of Christ, words associated with the climax of redemptive revelation, he was speaking words that were marked with the imprint of Spirit and life. Jesus had said, "It is the Spirit who gives life; the flesh profits nothing; the words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life" (John 6:63).

Paul continues in vs. 13 by declaring that the purpose of the veil an Moses' face was to prevent Israel from seeing the fading away of the glory, i.e., from seeing the temporary nature of the Mosaic law-covenant. In vs. 14 he extends this interpretation to his own day. The veil on Moses' face is still present with the Jews when they read the old law-covenant and the result is that they still fail to recognize that that covenant was temporary in God's purpose.

This leads Paul to the climactic citation in vs. 16. Dunn summarizes the argument to this point:

It is as though he Paul said: 'Consider Exod. 34:29-35 by doxa I understand the temporary nature of the old covenant; by kalumma I understand that which blinds the Jews to this fact. with this understanding in mind observe what the text says about the way in which the veil is removed.'25

It is when a man turns to the Lord that the veil is taken away. it is when one turns and sees Christ that the veil is removed and the temporary character of the Mosaic law-covenant is suddenly seen as well. Paul is saying in yet another way that in-the coming of Christ history has reached its redemptive climax. As Moses turned to Yahweh for the removing of the veil so now in the climax of redemptive history men must turn to Christ for the removing of the same veil. He alone can remove the veil which then brings into view the climactic adequacy of the covenant of the Spirit.

With the aid of this midrashic homily, the ground is laid for a deeper understanding of Paul's letter/Spirit contrast. The letter/ Spirit motif, just like the law/grace motif, reflects not only an ontological contrast, but also, and more importantly, an historical one. There is a movement in redemptive revelation reflected in the shift from letter to Spirit. Such movement can also be seen in Gal. 5:18, "If you are led by the Spirit, you are not under law." Paul makes a categorical separation of the Spirit's activity from the law. The reason is clear from what has been observed in II Cor. 3. The blessing of the Spirit's presence and leadership has been covenantally defined. He is the blessing of the new covenant, not the old. So if one is led by the Spirit, one has entered the new age and come under the blessings of the new covenant, and is, consequently, not under law.

It would be remiss to leave 11 Cor. 3 without noting vs. 18. Paul in this verse rounds out the grand conclusion of the removed veil by graphically picturing the vigor and power resident in the covenant of the Spirit. Under the sovereignty of the Lord who is Spirit, we with unveiled faces beholding as-in a mirror the glory of the Lord who is Christ are transformed more and more into His image moving from one degree of glory to another. Such a pattern for transformation the old covenant never had. Transfiguration by vision: the pattern of progressive glorification under the New Covenant is but a foretaste of the consummation when "we shall be like Him, because we shall see Him just as He is" (I John 3:26).

1) Herman Ridderbos, Paul: An Outline of His Theology, trans. by John R. DeWitt (Grand Rapids: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., 1975), p. 148.

2) John W. Drane, "Why Did Paul Write Romans?" in Pauline Studies: Essays Presented to F. F. Bruce on His 70th Birthday, ed. by Donald A. Hagner and Murray J. Harris (London: The Paternoster Press,'1980)~" p.. 219.

3) K.P. Donfried, "False Presuppositions in the Study of Romans," Catholic Biblical Quarterly 36 (1974), 332-355. This study and others has now been collected into The Romans Debate, ed. by K.P. Donfried (Minneapolis: Augsburg Publishing House, 1977), pp. 120-151.

4) Donfried, The Romans Debate, pp. 140-141.

5) E.A. Judge, "St. Paul and Classical Society," Jarbuch fur Antike und Christentum 15 (1972), 33. Cited by Drane, op. cit., p. 220.

6) The writer is indebted to Longenecker for the term "inaugurated eschatology." Longenecker, Paul, Apostle of Liberty, p. 143.

7) Everett F. Harrison, "Romans" in The Expositor's Bible Commentary, ed. by Frank E. Gaebelein (Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing Co., 1976), 10:68.

8) Ernst Kasemann, Commentary on Romans, trans. and ed. by Geoffrey W. Bromiley (Grand Rapids: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., 1980). p. 170.

9) John R.W. Stott, Men Made New (Downers Grove: Inter Varsity Press, 1966), pp. 49-50.

1O) Bandstra, The Law and the Elements of the World, p. 78.

11) C.K. Barrett, A Commentary on the Epistle to the Romans (New York: Harper & Row, Publishers, 1957), p. 132; F. Godet, Commentary on the Epistle to the Romans, trans. by A. Cusin, reprint ed. (Grand Rapids: Zondervan Publishing House, 1956), p. 257; R.C.H. Lenski, The Interpretation of St. Paul's Epistle to the Romans (Minneapolis: Augsburg Publishing House, 1961), pp. 426-427.

12) Kasemann, op. cit., p. 178.12) Kasemann, op. cit., p. 178.

13) H.P. Liddon, Explanatory Analysis of St. Paul's Epistle to the Romans, reprint ed. (Minneapolis: James and Klock, 1977), p. 113.

14) John Murray, The Epistle to the Romans (Grand Rapids: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., 1968), pp. 228-.229.

15) Ibid, p. 207.

16)B. Schneider, "The Meaning of St. Paul's Antithesis 'The Letter and the Spirit'," Catholic Biblical Quarterly, 15 (1953), 188-207.

17) Bernard cited by Geoffrey B. Wilson, 2 Corinthians: A Digest of Reformed Comment (London: Banner of Truth Trust, 1973), p. 38.

18) Charles Hodge, Commentary on 1 & 2 Corinthians, reprint ed. (Edinburgh: Banner of Truth Trust, 1974), p. 427.

19) Bruce K. Waltke, "On How to Study the Psalms Devotionally," Crux, 16:2 (June, 1980), 3.

20) It is interesting to observe how those who hold to a covenant theology position have no hesitation in seeing a drastic modification in the recipients of the New Covenant, from Israel and Judah to the church, and yet are usually resistant to such modification in the word "law." P.E. Hughes says: "The establishment of the new covenant, however, implies neither the abrogation nor the depreciation of the Mosaic law ... There is no question of a new law or of no law. Neither God changes nor His law. The difference between the old and new covenants is that under the former that law is written on tablets of stone... whereas under the latter the law is written internally within the redeemed heart.. ." P.E. Hughes, The Second Epistle to the Corinthians (Grand Rapids: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., 1962), p. 94. 0. Palmer Robertson says: "The substance of covenant law will provide a basis for continuity between old and new covenants. Indeed, God shall write his will on the fleshly tablets of the heart, in contrast with the older engraving of his law on stone tablets. But it will be essentially the same law of God that will be the substance of this engraving." 0. Palmer Robertson, The Christ of the Covenants (Grand Rapids: Baker Book House, 1980), pp. 281-282.

21) H.A.W. Meyer, Critical and Exegetical Hand-book to the Epistles to the Corinthians, trans. by D. Bannerman, reprint ed. (Winona Lake: Alpha Publications, 1980), 6:465.

22) Midrashic interpretation is summarized by Renee Bloch in the following points:

1.

Its point of departure is Scripture; it is a reflection or meditation on the Bible.
2.

It is homiletical, and largely originates from the liturgical reading of the Torah.
3.

It makes a punctilious analysis of the text, with the object of illuminating obscurities found there. Every effort is made to explain the Bible by the Bible, as a rule not arbitrarily but by exploiting a theme.
4.

The biblical message is adapted to suit contemporary needs.
5.

According to the nature of the biblical text, the midrash either tries to discover the basic principles inherent in the legal sections, with the aim of solving problems not dealt with in Scripture (halakhah); or it sets out to find the true significance of events in the narrative sections of the Pentateuch (haggadah).

According to these criteria, we may label Paul's use of Exod. 34 in 11 Cor. 3 as a haggadic midrash. Cited by R.N. Longenecker, Biblical Exegesis in the Apostolic Period (Grand Rapids: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing Co., 1975), p. 37.

23) J.D.G. Dunn, "2 Corinthians 3:17 --The Lord is the Spirit,"'The Journal of Theological Studies, 21 (October, 1970), 309-320. 1 have borrowed liberally from this excellent study.

24) W.C. van Unnik, "'With Unveiled Face,' An Exegesis of 2 Corinthians 3:12-18," Novum Testamentum 5 (1962), 161.

25) Dunn, op. cit., P. 312

If we let this news ruin the next 17 years... (2, Funny)

Braintrust (449843) | about 12 years ago | (#3941589)

... then the asteroids will have won.

Cheers! by poopbot (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941590)

Happy Troll Tuesday!

Credits: on by

Trolling your way on the web today
Takes everything you've got;
Having a Bot to post your comments
Sure would help a lot.
Wouldn't you like to join the frey?

Sometimes you want to go
And get a First Post in your name,
So much goatse that you came;
We know it's hard to get Eff Pee,
Our troubles are all the same;
Get that FP and everyone'll know your name.

- posted by poopbot: the bot formerly known as pwpbot

YuX7JjwHLr Post #608

2 Kilometers? (0)

Nashville Guy (585073) | about 12 years ago | (#3941593)

Can you imagine how much Preparation H it'll take to cool THAT asteroid down?

Lemme guess... (1, Troll)

Pig Hogger (10379) | about 12 years ago | (#3941596)

... the asteroid is full of guys with sneaked box cutters...

Hammer of God (2)

Stiletto (12066) | about 12 years ago | (#3941597)


Time to break out _The Hammer of God_ by Arthur Clarke. For those of you living under a rock (heh heh) it's a novel about a large rocky mass headed on a collision course with earth and the world-wide pants-shitting that ensues after it's discovered.

Good book.

Pfew.. (1)

Mr2cents (323101) | about 12 years ago | (#3941598)

"The error in our knowledge of where NT7 will be on 1 February 2019 is large, several tens of millions of kms."

Earth's diameter is 6000km, so that's still a small chance I guess. Luckily. I was already turning green when I read the /. post.

from my understanding (1)

XO (250276) | about 12 years ago | (#3941599)

I'm not very good on the mathematical end of this, but a 0.06, from the documentation i see at this site from Nasa [nasa.gov] looks somewhat risky.
"...while Palermo Scale values between -2 and 0 indicate situations that merit careful monitoring. Potential impacts with positive Palermo Scale values will generally indicate situations that merit some level of concern."


"The scale compares the likelihood of the detected potential impact with the average risk posed by objects of the same size or larger over the years until the date of potential impact."
This tells me that this is 6% more likely to occur than an object the same size and energy level blindsiding us without any sort of warning whatsoever.

So, we think that this one has a 6% higher chance of hitting us than something that we never even get on our radars. OK. That makes sense. I think.

I think I'm going to go and put that date into my Evolution calendar!

Hmm! (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941601)

In the future, NT7 results in the destruction of life as we know it. _Surely_ all of Slashdot can't have missed the humour in that little tidbit.

Typical British understatemeNT (1)

a nanny mouse (46340) | about 12 years ago | (#3941603)

in other news, crazy british people deemed crazy.

Picture (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941605)

Did you see the picture at the top of the article? I am no scientician, but that looked bigger than 2km to me, something that big would almost liquefy the earth. I am glad they didn't get carried away and start to sound alarmist........

Re:Picture (2)

Peyna (14792) | about 12 years ago | (#3941622)

It looked like the moon hit the north pole to me. Wouldn't that be fun? =]

USian pie by poopbot (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941608)

Happy Troll Tuesday!

USian Pie

A long, long time ago I can still remember How the trollers used to make me smile And I knew if I had to boast That I could try to get first post And maybe I'd be happy for a while But moderators made me shiver With every minus they'd deliver DoS scripts couldn't stop it They scored them all "Offtopic" I know that it's cheap crack they smoke And meta-moderation's broke At first I thought it was a joke The day that trolltalk died

-- Chorus --
Bye, bye, MEEPTy, OOG, and Grits guy Drove the Cruiser like some loser who starts posts with a *sigh*
Those Steve Woston posts that we all knew were a lie Wonder what became of girls petrified? What became of girls petrified?
--

Did you write a bunch of Perl? And did it make you want to hurl Feces at the Wall? Can you believe these lame-ass polls? Do you post big stretched-out assholes? Can you make the goatse.cx link not show? Well I know you think that Siggy sucked Will the real Bruce Perens please stand up? The bots don't have a clue. Man, I dig those trolls from Shoe! I was a rabid Free Speech advocate With a Red Hat T-shirt and a Free Beer gut
Bought my Sony laptop working Pizza Hut The day that trolltalk died

-- Chorus --

It's been two years since the IPO And LNUX sinks to all-time lows But that's not how it used to be When Spiral showed how it was done Trolling as Jon Erikson Who worked for NPO Technologies Oh and while they tried to filter posts Somebody rooted Slashdot's host "Crack Slashdot? That's absurd!" Better go change your password While JonKatz wrote a Hellmouth book By using posts he simply took And we flamed him till he was cooked The day that trolltalk died And we were singin....

-- Chorus --

10 grams. Inchfan. Didn't log out. Goddamn The mods will find the sid real soon, man
You can't hide if you aren't AC Your bud (George here) tried BSD A dead Streetlawyer's tips were free And WIPO helped letsriot turn Nazi 70 made his percents up While 80md warned "liberals suck" The moon does not exist It's just a liberal myth Oh and as Taco tried to take a nap We forced him to invoke bitchslaps Do you recall the flood of crap The day that trolltalk died? We started singin....

-- Chorus --

Oh and then we were wearing out "All your base" And started posting monospace
The better for our penis birds So come on, be a zealot, be a dick You don't think Anne Marie's a chick? Because lying's all we do about HURD So go and push for BSD And say GPL isn't free Slow down, cowboy! The limit Is one post every minute Now tell the right wing facist slime Infringing on Your Rights Online That they can't censor all the time The day that trolltalk died

-- Chorus --

I met a troll they called The Rev And asked him if CD BREAK HEAD He said, "That's old. Get over it." And with all the courage I could muster "Imagine what a Beowulf cluster...." But it wasn't worth the trouble to submit The karma caps are just plain jive And everyone's moved to K5 The steelcage has grown rusted And Geekizoid is busted
The three sites I don't see for weeks Segfault, kernel, Comp-u-geek Code is not art. This ain't Freshmeat The day that trolltalk died

-- Chorus --

- posted by poopbot: for all your crapflooding needs

zvVdPza7i0 Post #609

WHY ... (1)

Mad Bad Rabbit (539142) | about 12 years ago | (#3941609)

are they announcing this when the orbit hasn't been confirmed yet? I thought that after the embarrassing 1997 XF-11 false alarm [swri.edu] , astronomers agreed to wait until they had enough data to confirm or rule out an impact, before releasing a press statement...

Bruce Willis, dead at 47 (0, Troll)

wrinkledshirt (228541) | about 12 years ago | (#3941612)

Just heard this on NPR this morning. Bruce Willis, the famous American thespian, was found dead in his home this morning. Even if you never met him in person you've probably enjoyed one of his movies. What a loss. Truly an American icon. And, of course, now we're all fucked because we don't have anybody to send up there to deal with this Asteroid.

(C'mon, at least give me a +1 funny for calling Bruce Willis a "thespian"... :D)

Petition NASA! Blast it out of the way now! (4, Funny)

mo (2873) | about 12 years ago | (#3941613)

This dangerous situation only get's harder to deride the longer we wait. I am doing everything I can to influence NASA to start working on getting a nuclear blast to deride the course of the oncoming danger. I agree that detonating a nuclear bomb in the course of the approaching llama is a bit drastic, but I refuse to sit idly by as the approaching threat of llama collision approaches.

Shock Astronomy (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941621)

Maybe this will shock the world into paying attention.

Kind of like the Marilyn Manson of Astronomy, except this one could kill a billion people.

Trollling in the name of by poopbot (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#3941626)

Happy Troll Tuesday!

Credits: Big Dogs Cock

Trolling in the name of
Some of those that boot Suse
Are the same that bought XP
Some of those that boot Suse
Are the same that bought XP
Trolling in the name of
And now you run what they told you
And now you run what they told you
And now you run what they told you

95 is justified for running the games that you didn't buy
95 is justified for running the games that you didn't buy
Some of those that boot Suse
Are the same that bought XP
Some of those that boot Suse
Are the same that bought XP

And you run what they told you
Now your under control
And you run what they told you
Now your under control
And you run what they told you
Come on!

Fuck you I wont run what you tell me
Fuck you I wont run what you tell me
Fuck you I wont run what you tell me
Fuck you I wont run what you tell me
Motherfucker

- posted by poopbot: news for turds, stuff that splatters

UDtoFJRKJ6 Post #610

why bother reporting (1)

clockwise_music (594832) | about 12 years ago | (#3941627)

Apart from making fun of the BCC, what is the point of reporting this item? Do we really care about an asteroid that's going to burn up on impact or not even go near the earth?
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