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Tan With Implants Instead Of Sun

timothy posted more than 12 years ago | from the g'tan-mate dept.

Science 54

WolfWithoutAClause writes: "Trials of a drug called Melanotan that increases the rate of melanin production in the skin is going well, and may be released for human use in 2005. Tan in a capsule! Less skin cancer and skin aging! No more tedious tanning! The ABC News article is here."

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Africa (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4202195)

This new drug has been secretly tested in Africa for many decades. It has been very successful. We should welcome these technological advances.

excellent (2)

tps12 (105590) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202196)

Now all I need is a pill that makes me trim and muscular and one that keeps me clean without requiring to shower. Then I can be a normal, healthy member of society.

Re:excellent (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4202310)

Only if they invent a pill that causes you to leave your house.

Re:excellent (2, Funny)

cpex (601202) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202383)

and don't forget a pill to wipe your ass, I mean talk about inconvience. :)

Re:excellent (3, Funny)

blazin (119416) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202508)

It simply wouldn't work...

I mean seriously, have you ever tried to wipe your ass with a tylenol?

Re:excellent (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4203392)

Actually, Melanotan also curbs your appetite. However, for getting muscles, you will have to eithe work out or take another pill that's in the works.

Re:excellent (1)

rizzo420 (136707) | more than 12 years ago | (#4210917)

i actually heard a radio ad for some new herbal thing that gives you "a cut body that women want". whether or not it's true... that's for you to decide... i also hear lots of ads for maximus or testosterall to increase the male sex drive (like the male needs an increased sex drive). those both make you "the sex machine" and "animal in bed that your lover wants". could they be the same company? probably...

The Slashdot Crowd.. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4202209) gonna love this pill.

Barbie Drug? (1)

littlerubberfeet (453565) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202214)

Can someone conferm if this is one version of the so called Barbie pill?

If I recall, 2 versions were being developed. One for tanning (its original purpose) and one version as a both-gender viagra pill (side effect found out during testing)

hmmm, if it is, I wonder if they got rid of the side effect?

Re:Barbie Drug? (0)

reyalsnogard (595701) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202258)

Erections [] as side-effect. Melanotan both darkens skin AND increases blood flow to selective regions!

Re:Barbie Drug? (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4202596)

I read the CNN article, and now I'm curious about the other advantages that this drug might give. Using fuzzy logic, if we say that the melanin does something (increase blood flow... or whatever...) to cause and elongation of the penis, which is something that dark people already have, then we can draw a really sketchy line that it would also cause other side effects that already exist in darker skinned people.
Not that most slashdot'ers care about the feelings of other, I am going to try my best to conjure images with out being insensitive. I have often noticed that people with dark skin have a different muscle structure than those of us with pasty white skin. Of course no stereotype works across the board, but this one, on average, holds up. Blacks have better muscle tone, than their white peer. Also, on average, men with white skin fail in comparison their dark skin peers, when gauging the size of the anatomy that make them men.
So, we have the following truth
T1) Pill makes skin darker
T2) Pill increases male member
T3) Black men already have darker skin
T4) Black men already have larger members.

Deductions from there abound. Let's talk about the athletic that the pill could give whites increase athletic prowess, faster reaction speeds, and the longer endurance. However, the reverse could be true as well. It could open the door to whites getting sickle cell anemia, skin flakes, lower SAT scores, and a proclivity to wear a hankie on their heads and shoot up neighborhoods with stolen guns. Could this pill be a blessing? Or will it start a rash of drug dealing, single white mothers.... I guess only time will tell.

Re:Barbie Drug? (1)

gene_tailor (601527) | more than 12 years ago | (#4205253)

Yes, that's the same thing.

Re:Barbie Drug? (2, Informative)

Lafe (595258) | more than 12 years ago | (#4209112)

Yes, it is. You can find more information here [] . Besides the tan and increased libido, other terrible side effects include clearing up acne, and suppressed appetite.

Long-term effects? (0)

reyalsnogard (595701) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202284)

Have the researchers concluded any long-term effects? .. or will this be yet another lovely drug quicked pushed passed the FDA only to be dangerously labeled after public adoption/consumption?

Re:Long-term effects? (0)

reyalsnogard (595701) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202302)

.. quicked pushed .. pushed ..

Where do I apply to be a /. editor? =)

Re:Long-term effects? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4202329)

Um, by noticing and correcting that error, you have failed the editor test.

Re:Long-term effects? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4202372)

Seeing as being an editor requires you to dupe posts and leave horrible English in to fp posts, I don't think being anal in a comment is gonna put you on the shortlist

Re:Long-term effects? (1)

soulcuttr (555929) | more than 12 years ago | (#4205134)

I can't find it on The Onion's website [] , but this article reminded me of a recent 'News in Brief' article titled Lazy FDA Approves X-Ray Vision Pills
WASHINGTON, DC--Citing the hot weather and a desire to go home for the day, FDA officials approved American Products Limited's "X-Ray Vision Pills" for commercial sale in the U.S. Monday. "After evaluating this and regulating that for months, we were really dying to cut out early, so we were all just like, 'Fuck it. Let's just approve this,'" FDA deputy commissioner Lester Crawford said. "Besides, nobody could think of a real good reason why X-ray-vision pills would be unsafe."
More and more I'm finding that just as all conversations can find comparisons to episodes of The Simpsons, references to The Onion are becoming just as easy to make. I fear for a future saturated with constant references to pop culture. *looks around* uh oh...


Re:Long-term effects? (0)

reyalsnogard (595701) | more than 12 years ago | (#4207671)

*looks around* uh oh...

Ooops, did you do it again?

Wow! (1)

therealmoose (558253) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202308)

From the article:

A new phase of human clinical trials is due to begin within the next few weeks after earlier tests saw
white-haired dogs and green frogs turn jet black when they were injected with the drug.

This might even get that pasty-white developer's tan (tan only on the elbow of the left arm where that one piece of light comes through the crack in the window) out!

Re:Wow! (1)

seriously !(kidding) (606583) | more than 12 years ago | (#4203901)

The only way I can conceive of this actually working is if it actually gave you a specific hormone that released large amounts of pigment into your skin... but still, how long can it last?

Re:Wow! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4213372)

Except that sun coming through a window won't get you tan, seeing as how glass blocks UV rays.

Excellent for hate crime offenders (1)

infonography (566403) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202362)

Crank it to max and let them be what they hate. Kinda like that movie the Watermellon man.

Tanning? (1)

fogof (168191) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202374)

Finaly I can look like I went to the beach, and still stay home in the basment in front of the computer all day long.

Anti-tanning ? (2, Interesting)

fogof (168191) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202386)

The same company that make tanning oils (to get your skin darker) make skin "bleachers" (for for indian/african market) ....
I wonder if this company will make an "Anti-tanning" pill, that will make your skin whiter?

I guess we are all going to end up being grey :)

Re:Anti-tanning ? (2)

Guppy (12314) | more than 12 years ago | (#4217490)

"I wonder if this company will make an "Anti-tanning" pill, that will make your skin whiter?"

Such things already exist. Examples include the skin bleaches Hydroquinone and Kojic Acid. Medically, they're used to treat pigmentation disorders, old age spots, hyperpigmented scars, etc.

Not surprisingly, skin bleaches have also has been used in some parts of the world for cosmetic purposes -- not a recommended use, since they can have serious side effects.

The reverse Michael Jackson effect (1)

cpex (601202) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202413)

instead of a black man turning white you got white geeks turning black Hey sign me up for some of this stuff my red-headed ass could use it:)

Re:The reverse Michael Jackson effect (1)

RedWolves2 (84305) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202677)

So if your theory is true we would all grow bigger noses and our voices would become really deep.

The reverse MJ effect!

Re:The reverse Michael Jackson effect (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4212084)

There's also the 9-11" penis factor. Too bad that would be wasted on the slashbot crowd.

id does more than that (5, Interesting)

an_mo (175299) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202464)

Actually, it has been shown that the drug has unwanted side effects, such increased libido and spontaneous erections in males. Now it's being studied as a viagra-substitute, the problem is to separate this from the tanning effect. An alternative is to market it as the "barbie-pill": tan & sex; add a sprinkle of coke and you have it all.

More info at [] .

Re:id does more than that (1)

Hoeken (554149) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202902)

not only that, but it also has properties such as appetite suppression and acne lie...this would be a very wonderful drug.

Re:it does more than that (3, Informative)

Dr.Dubious DDQ (11968) | more than 12 years ago | (#4203468)

Dagnabbit, I was just about to mention this, and somebody's beaten me to it.. :-)

The drug in question is, as I recall, "Melanocyte Stimulating Hormone", which evidently is showing in trials that it improves libido for both men and women. It seemingly acts in the brain rather than the genitals (and as any marriage/sex councelor should tell you, the brain is the most important sex organ after all) and so works in a completely different way from viagra and such.

Wonder how hard it is to get hold of stock in this company....whether it's OFFICIALLY released for anything other than a tanning-aid, you just KNOW that the, ahem, "off-label" uses of it will make it awfully popular....

(I find it hilarious to see increased libido listed as an unwanted side-effect... :-) )

Re:it does more than that (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4204850)

I find it hilarious to see increased libido listed as an unwanted side-effect...

Yeah, who wouldn't want to be frustratingly horny all the time? Nothing like a spontaneous erection at a funeral to get people talking about what a cool necrophiliac you are. It's the latest craze!

Re:id does more than that (1)

lbjay (34118) | more than 12 years ago | (#4203773)

Increased libido and spontaneous erections?!? Wow, I really don't have a reason to go to the beach anymore!

Re:id does more than that (1)

He Schutze He Scores (607680) | more than 12 years ago | (#4233668)

Geez.. more spontaneous erections and libido?? Just what I didn't need. It's like being 15 years old again ;) Now if it would enlarge breasts too, we could call it the XXX pill. HSHS

where can i order? (1)

sideone (256163) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202609)

Well i guess we have a few years before it comes out, but maybe ill finally have a tan! i spend way too much time working, coding, and learning to lay in the sun. now that i think about it, ill probobly have some type of excuse for not using the tan-pill as well.. cheers

Rock on.... (1)

Pahroza (24427) | more than 12 years ago | (#4202745)

Maybe we can slip some of these to Michael Jackson, I'm sure his family will love us for restoring him his blackness!

Bleached (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4226336)

One pill to increase melanin production and one to decrease it. Instantly everybody has the same skin color and we'll have to find something other than skin color to discriminate against each other. Cool.

One pill to rule them all :)

Banana split (candid camera) (2)

oever (233119) | more than 12 years ago | (#4203209)

This article reminds me of I nonsense story I told one of my roommates.

I was preparing to go on holiday to South Africa (spending my flying quotum for approx. 10 years) and needed to get some shots.
During the daily washing up, my roommate asked me which shots I had had to take. I told him, the regular shots, but since he likes fooling people around, I thought I'd get back at him for some of his pranks, and I told him I'd also taken an experimental shot which was supposed to increase my melatonin level in the next week, so I'd already have a tan when I'd go to South Africa. The point of the shot was that the tan would protect me from the sun instead of sun tan lotion. Since it was an experimental shot I'd volenteered to at the docter's, I was supposed to take a picture of myself twice a day, making sure the lightning was always equal. Also during my holiday I should measure my light exposure and continue taking pictures.

I was really surprised by the fact he totally believed my story! I thought it was completely transparent bullshit. In the next week he kept informing about the progess, and months later when I told him he'd been fooled he was really flabergasted. But now, three years later, the same idea's on slashdot....

So why did I needed to get back at this guy?

Every morning he woke up before everybody else in the house. Since nobody was in the kitchen while he was there, he started drawing a crack from the ceiling of our new house, adding only the slightest bit every day. We were quite worried about the solidity of our house, but couldn't properly examine the crack since it was so high up. The need to go up to the crack, since it was so obvious. It took months before we realised the crack was drawn with a pencil!

Re:Banana split (candid camera) (1)

budalite (454527) | more than 12 years ago | (#4205774)

eeek! The enemy is inside the gates. (Well, he would be if we had gates...) Careful, if you are not THE JackV, you might have copyright issues over your name.

Happy Friday.
[When is a firewall not a firewall? When it's full of Gates. Windows = Gated Communites?]

Who needs it (1)

LastToKnow (449735) | more than 12 years ago | (#4203561)

My CRT tan is coming along just fine without any help. People need to stick to doing things the natural way.

tedious? (1)

alphaFlight (26589) | more than 12 years ago | (#4204069)

one word... Bikinis

Re:tedious? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4204085)

I don't think it will look good if the body is tanned and both boobs are white :)

Whats with all the tanning crap anyway? (2)

xagon7 (530399) | more than 12 years ago | (#4204560)

I think women look MUCH better pale-skinned anyday (Carrie Ann Moss, Liv Tyler, my wife) ;)

Re:Whats with all the tanning crap anyway? (2, Interesting)

gene_tailor (601527) | more than 12 years ago | (#4205255)

Actually, the "medical" application is in preventing skin cancer. That's why the Australians (who have really high skin cancer rates) are the ones pushing this as a commercial development, though the chemical was first identified in the US.

Old news... and more details (3, Informative)

gene_tailor (601527) | more than 12 years ago | (#4205276)

This story had some media coverage about 5 years ago... For example, here's a Boston Globe bit with some useful details: ories/heal th/how_and_why/101397.htm
A more recent article which is much better than the lame ABC story is on Wired: elanotan .html

Other colors? (2)

Myco (473173) | more than 12 years ago | (#4205339)

The real trick would be a pill that lets you change your skin to a more outlandish color than "sorta brownish." Certain subcultures woul just eat this up. I can imagine a warehouse full of ravers with purple, green, fluorescent, etc. skin.

Implants ?? Try Body Thetans. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4206313)

I have my thetans working overtime keeping me all tanned up year round.
All it takes is some time auditing and you to could enjoy a nice tan without using creams or spending time at tanning salons.

I wonder (0)

andrew_0812 (592089) | more than 12 years ago | (#4206500)

Would this work for people who cannot tan naturally? I have never been able to tan, I just burn or get freckles. It would be nice if this would work for people like me.

freckles? (1)

meridoc (134765) | more than 12 years ago | (#4206787)

How about people who don't process sunlight well and freckle instead of tan? Does the pill give an even tan or really big spots? ("look! I'm now a dalmation!")

King of Pop (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 12 years ago | (#4207340)

Finally, a cure for Michael Jackson is right around the corner!

Implants??? (2)

Alsee (515537) | more than 12 years ago | (#4209736)

It's a pill, not an implant.

Side effects include increased sex drive, appetite suppressant, it's an anti-inflamitory, and it may fight acne (not sure about that one).

It would be the perfect barbie pill if only it madeyou blond too. Tan, thin, horny, no pain, and clear complexion.


Perfect market (1)

reitoei1971 (583076) | more than 12 years ago | (#4231154)

Now I never have to leave my cubicle!
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