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Extending and Embedding Perl

timothy posted more than 11 years ago | from the serendipitous-augmentation dept.

Perl 145

habit forming writes "Enjoy using Perl? Ever marvel at how Perl can "do the right thing" but still be written in C? Extending and Embedding Perl aims to take the black magic out of understanding our favorite language. In fact, the authors flat out admit they think it is unfair that only so few of us get to have one foot in Perl and one in C. Tim Jenness and Simon Cozens attempt to break down that barrier with lots of annotated code examples, direct analogies from the structures in Perl to those in C, a fine-grain look at XS and what it takes to robustly use a Perl interpreter in C."

What's that up your sleeve?

It is my experience that many situations require us to "look under the hood" of (thoroughly examine) a solution to understand how to best use it effectively. Perl is no exception. The ability to bring such a force as Perl to a project at the proper time is a valuable skill to possess. However, wading chest-deep into XS and the Perl internals is not for the faint of heart. Jenness and Cozens ease this process by stepping in lightly at first.

What's in it?

The book begins with simple C examples that are then related back to the readers' knowledge of Perl. Then the text seems to throw us a curve by leaping off into building Perl modules. But there is method to the madness: building Perl modules correctly is inextricably linked to XS. Light introductions to XS are performed and the reader is well on his/her way to building .so extensions to any .pm.

After building a very specific foundation of simple C examples, module building, and some XS, the text returns to C to introduce pointers, arrays, file I/O and memory management. With these new skills, we begin to explore the structure and implementation of Perl variable types. Chapter 4 provides many useful diagrams of how Perl variables "look" and what C structures they translate into.

Still following a logical and constant order, we explore the Perl 5 API, learning how to post and retrieve information to the variable types explored in the previous chapter. As much as it might seem, this is not a rehash of the perlapi doc. It is consistent with the perlapi doc, but Jenness and Cozens provide extensively annotated C code examples.

Casting deeper still, we add the advanced C of pointers, arrays, file I/O and memory management to our knowledge of XS. At this point we have everything we need to effectively extend Perl, but the text continues deeper still by exploring how XSUB interfaces to Perl's internals. It is only the clearly documented, step-by-step explanations of this chapter that make it manageable for an average user like myself. Chapter 7 ends our stint with XS by discussing some alternative XS (or equivalent code) generation suites.

Switching gears entirely, we grab libperl.a and stuff into a C program. Chapter 8 begins the task of embedding Perl into a C program. Jenness and Cozens continue the embedded discussion through a Case Study in Chapter 9 and end with a look through the Perl internals in Chapter 10.

The final chapter (Chapter 11) details some of Perl's history, its development process, how we could become involved and what the future of Perl and Perl 6 may entail.

Final Thought

This book was indispensable in gaining a good foothold on using Perl in, from, and around C. I found it a good reference guide as well as an easy ,linear read. It is not a replacement for the perlguts, perlapi and perlxs documentation, but then again, it doesn't try to be. The annotated code examples with every line explained make following the book with development of your own solution a lot easier than in some other books. However, the in-depth explanations can be a bit frustrating for the impatient.


You can purchase Extending and Embedding Perl from bn.com. Slashdot welcomes readers' book reviews -- to see your own review here, read the book review guidelines, then visit the submission page.

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145 comments

OMGOMGOMG TROOL TUESDAY FP (-1)

Sexual Asspussy (453406) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505108)

Parties at the Watson place had been held for several years. They took place all year long, but the summer parties-around the pool and hot tub-were the best. This summer had been exceptionally hot and so were the parties. The crowd consisted of faculty from a half dozen local two-year and four-year colleges and a handful of students. Although invitations were never sent out, those who were welcome knew whom they were. Unattractive, overweight guests need not attend. If you were under 18, you didn't get past the door.

Traci was an incoming freshman at a nearby community college who had turned 18 in the spring. She was invited to tonight's party by Judy Clark, a 30-year-old professor at the school, and who also acted as Traci's counselor. The two were as similar in personality as they were opposite in appearance. Traci was tall and thin with shoulder length blonde hair. Judy was a short brunette, darker and curvier than Traci. Both women were well tanned from the summer. Judy had smiled at Traci earlier in the week when she said Traci would have ample opportunity at the party to show off her bronze body.

Before the parties were over, the vast majority of guests would be at least partially undressed. No female around the pool or hot tub would have a top on; either by their own choice or at the hands of a male guest. Nudity was not unheard of, but sexual activity was generally confined to the various rooms in the house.

Judy's full breasts had been enjoyed by many men at previous parties and she knew they would appreciate Traci's petite, hour glass figure...especially her small, round ass.

They arrived a little before 11 p.m. John Watson met them at the door and let them in with a welcoming smile. John was a muscular, athletic man in his mid 30s with broad shoulders under his tank top. He quickly eyed Traci's lithe body as Judy introduced her. John explained where drinks and food could be found, then left the women alone.

The house was filled with noise. Music, voices and laughter seemed to come from every corner. Judy and Traci proceeded to the bar. While mixing their favorite drinks, a voice called for Judy. From the door leading to the pool the women saw a couple waving to them.

"Oh, there's Linda and Tom," Judy said. "We'll be right there," she yelled to them over the din.

Linda was a tall woman in her early 30s with long, straight brown hair. The hair hung in front of her, partially covering her otherwise naked breasts. Tom was a slightly older man in a bathing suit, his arm around Linda's waist, a thumb inside her bikini bottoms.

With drinks in hand, Traci and Judy walked over to where Linda and Tom stood. Introductions were made and the four decided to sit outside by the pool and hot tub.

The area was busy with guests mingling, but the foursome was able to find a table and enough chairs for everyone to sit. Traci surveyed the patio and yard surrounding them. Large and small groups of people sat or stood in the dimly lit area. More than one couple could be seen standing with the man behind the woman, hands cupping her naked breasts, his bathing suit covered cock grinding against her ass. Beyond the pool, shadowy forms could be seen on the ground rolling on towels. At the hot tub, rules seemed to prohibit anybody entering with a bathing suit on.

Traci saw Judy eyeing what appeared to be a student in his early 20s entering the tub, his thick cock swaying freely as he stepped in. When the young man sat down, women on both sides kissed him, their hands out of sight.

Traci's and Judy's attention was brought back to their table when Tom said, "I'm glad you could make it Judy. I hope you plan on taking your usual swim before you leave."

"Yes, Tom. I'll take my shirt off for you if you want," Judy said smiling. Tom laughed.

Small talk was exchanged and Tom offered to get new drinks for everyone. Traci and Judy agreed on refills and Tom disappeared into the house. He returned a few minutes later and handed the drinks around. He watched the women and smiled.

About fifteen minutes later, he said, "Let's go inside. I want to show Traci some of the special rooms they have in there. You'll love this." Traci looked at Judy, who smiled and nodded.

They moved toward the house, weaving through the crowd with drinks in hand. Traci immediately felt lightheaded, but passed it off as strong drinks. By the time they got to the door, she had difficulty finding the step up. She bumped into Judy, who said with a slur, "Oops, I lost my balance." They staggered into the house and the noise, both seeing a whirling blur of light.

"This way," they barely heard Tom say. He was walking in front of them, looking back. Linda trailed behind. They entered a hallway and Traci instantly felt claustrophobic. She reached out with her free hand and touched the wall. Judy stumbled over Traci's foot and nearly fell. Their drinks splashed over the edge of the glasses. Neither could focus further than three feet in front of them.

They followed Tom into a large, dimly lit bedroom. Both Traci and Judy grabbed the nearest piece of furniture to hold themselves up.

"Here," Tom said to Traci. "Take a drink." He took the drink from Traci's hand and put it to her mouth. Instinctively, or without the ability to refuse, Traci drank. He did the same with Judy.

Setting the drinks on top of the dresser Traci leaned against, he took her arm and led her to the side of the king size bed in the room. "Sit down," he said.

Traci obeyed. Her body went limp and her eyes began to close. Linda, meanwhile, had walked Judy to the opposite side of the bed and sat her down.

Tom looked at Traci and said, "Traci, I'll let you sleep but you need to get undressed first. OK?"

Traci nodded, but said nothing.

"Judy, can you hear me?" Tom asked.

"Yes," Judy said faintly.

"Can you do me a favor and get undressed so you can lay down?"

Judy nodded her head.

"OK, girls. Go ahead and start undressing. Linda and I will be here to help you," Tom said.

Without hesitation, both women began stripping. Judy pulled her tank top over her head, revealing a pair of firm, round tits. Traci had worn a bikini under her t-shirt. It covered a small portion of her ample, tanned breasts. She unsnapped and unzipped her shorts before sliding them down her legs. Tom grabbed them around the knees and pulled them off, along with Traci's shoes. Traci reached behind her and struggled with the bikini top's tie strings. She managed to pull it open and slipped out of the top. Her breasts, while not as large as Judy's, were nicely shaped with erect, pink nipples.

Judy removed her shorts and panties with help from Linda. Traci lowered her bikini bottoms until they slid down her legs and to the floor. Tom stared intently at the closely shaven, pale colored area around her pussy. Her hips and thighs were silky smooth and deeply tanned.

"Good," Tom said enthusiastically. "Now, go ahead and lay down."

The women simultaneously swung their legs up to the bed, scooted toward the pillows and lay on their backs. Traci could make out figures around the bed, but could not focus on faces. Her body felt warm. Tingling sensations ran through her legs and arms. She moved her fingers over her thighs, enjoying the light touch.

She and Judy heard Tom's voice through the fog that surrounded them. "Can you touch your breasts, girls?"

As if controlled by a machine, their hands moved to their tits and they began kneading them gently.

"Good. Does it feel good to squeeze your nipples?"

Both women put their nipples between thumb and forefinger and manipulated them. "Oh, yes," Judy murmurred.

"Does that make you horny?" he asked.

Traci nodded in consent. Judy moved her right hand down to her pussy and massaged her clit.

"Traci," Tom said softly. "Play with your pussy for me."

Traci's legs separated slightly. Her hand found her pussy lips and followed them up to her clit. She slid her middle finger up and down until stopping on top of her clit. She made small circular motions over it, moaning softly.

During this process of self-arousal, Tom and Linda had stripped and a couple other guests had entered the room. Tom stood naked on Traci's side of the bed, his cock already semi-erect. He ran his fingers over it as Traci played with herself. He leaned forward and put his hand over her left tit. He traced around the base of her tit before cupping nearly the entire thing in his big hand. He squeezed it several times before once again stroking his cock, bringing it to full erection.

He climbed onto the bed and placed himself between Traci's legs. In a brief moment of reduced but clear awareness, Traci struggled to get out from under the object above her. But Tom grabbed her wrists and pinned them against the bed beside her head. He lowered his head and put his mouth over her left tit.

"No, no," she panted.

Tom sucked on the nipple, running his tongue back and forth over it. Traci's young breast flattened against her chest with the force of his mouth closing over it again. He licked her nipple harder. It was growing longer with each attack of his tongue and Traci's struggling was subsiding.

He moved to the other breast and pressed his entire body down onto hers. His hard cock lay between their flattened stomachs. Judy looked on from just a couple feet away, unable to comprehend what was happening next to her.

Traci was moaning softly now as Tom licked her right nipple. "Reach down and hold my cock," he whispered into her ear. He let go of her right hand and it found his thick cock between them. "Stroke it," he said, raising his mouth off her breast.

Traci's arm worked mechanically on his cock. Tom raised his body slightly to allow her better access.

"Put it on your clit," he told her. He moved down the bed a few inches so she could place the cock on her clit. With her hand still on top of his stiff cock, he moved up and down across the top of her pussy. Traci's eyes were closed and her mouth open, her breathing getting heavier and heavier.

Next to Tom and Traci, a naked student appearing to be in his early 20s was sliding between Judy's legs. His extraordinarily thick cock was fully erect, nearly touching his stomach. When the boy was in position and put his mouth on one of Judy's expansive breasts, she seemed to awaken and protested by hitting him in the side with fisted hands. The boy simply grabbed her wrists and stretched them over her head. With one quick motion, one wrist was handcuffed, the cuffs fed through the headboard railing and the second wrist cuffed.

When Judy cried out, "Stop, no!" Traci seemed to sense her surroundings better. She let go of Tom's cock and pushed up against his body. But he didn't budge. He simple moved his cock to the entrance to her pussy and inserted the tip into her. He could feel her wetness and warmth. One more quick thrust and he was inside her. Traci put her hands behind Tom's neck and hit him repeatedly.

"No, no," she breathed hoarsley.

Tom began fucking her more vigorously and Traci spread her legs involuntarily. The bed rocked with his movement. Judy was squirming under the boys oral attacks on her breasts, which swayed in rhythm with Tom's motion. Quickly, the boy positioned himself and drove his huge cock into her cunt. Judy moaned and arched her back. The boy plunged into her again, and she fell to the bed.

Traci was now gripping the back of Tom's neck with her fingers. Her long nails left red marks wherever they made contact with his tan skin. Tom reached down and pulled her legs up and placed them by his hips. Traci wrapped them around him, feeling just enough of the pleasure of his cock in her to want more. He obliged by ramming into her repeatedly, his balls slapping against her ass.

The boy next to them had, likewise, lifted Judy's knees and was penetrating her at a rapid rate. When he paused to lay on top of her while completely buried in her cunt, Judy pushed her hips upward and back to the bed attempting to continue the fuck session. The boy eventually started to pump her again, grunting loundly with each thrust.

Traci had moved her hand between herself and Tom and was playing with her clit. Within minutes, she was moaning more loudly. Her face showed the strain as she fought between repulsion and pending orgasm.

"Aaahhhhh, yes. Oooohhhhhhhh," Traci cried out.

She bit her lower lip and screamed again as her back arched off the bed. Tom placed his hands under her ass and pulled her up farther. He pounded into her and she clasped her hands behind his neck, trying to hang on.

"oh, oh, umh, ummmmm," signalled the beginning of her orgasm. In her mind she was screaming, but those in the room simply heard the moans of a woman releasing entirely. Her body shook with each surge of her orgasm, causing Tom to climax as well. He grunted even louder than Traci, driving his cock deep inside her. Long, white shots of his cum entered her womb. Over and over he shoved her down onto the bed, plunging his cock and his sperm into her.

The combined noise and rocking next to him caused the boy to erupt. He pulled out of her and stroked himself. The first string of cum reached her neck. The second spurt landed on her right breast, trailing a line of cum over her nipple and down her stomach. Three more shots landed on her breasts and stomach.

Tom and Traci both were collapsed on the bed, his limp cock laying on her thigh.

When the boy was finished coating Judy's front side with his cum, he stepped off the bed and was replaced by Linda. She immediately buried her face in Judy's pussy. Pushing Judy's legs farther apart, Linda began licking from Judy's cunt to her clit. Several more strokes over the clit caused Judy to stiffen her legs and shriek, "Oh, yes, there...there. That's it."

She pulled violently against her restraints and yelled again as she began to cum. Linda pressed harder against Judy, putting her entire mouth over the clit and sucking hard. Her tongue worked it feverishly as Judy experienced a body numbing orgasm. Joices flowed from her cunt as she gyrated in all directions around Linda's mouth. She began humping Linda's face until the last of the orgasms left her limp. She jerked in response to Linda's continued licking, but she was spent.

The women would wake up later, each covered in thick, white cum. Neither would remember the evening. Both would consider returning.

eat at subway (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505111)

jared commands you to, fools!!!

g to the oatse of course

NIG (-1)

Proctal Relapse (467579) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505114)

Parties at the Watson place had been held for several years. They took place all year long, but the summer parties-around the pool and hot tub-were the best. This summer had been exceptionally hot and so were the parties. The crowd consisted of faculty from a half dozen local two-year and four-year colleges and a handful of students. Although invitations were never sent out, those who were welcome knew whom they were. Unattractive, overweight guests need not attend, fag. If you were under 18, you didn't get past the door.

Traci was an incoming freshman at a nearby community college who had turned 18 in the spring. She was invited to tonight's party by Judy Clark, a 30-year-old professor at the school, and who also acted as Traci's counselor. The two were as similar in personality as they were opposite in appearance. Traci was tall and thin with shoulder length blonde hair. Judy was a short brunette, darker and curvier than Traci. Both women were well tanned from the summer. Judy had smiled at Traci earlier in the week when she said Traci would have ample opportunity at the party to show off her bronze body.

Before the parties were over, the vast majority of guests would be at least partially undressed. No female around the pool or hot tub would have a top on; either by their own choice or at the hands of a male guest. Nudity was not unheard of, but sexual activity was generally confined to the various rooms in the house.

Judy's full breasts had been enjoyed by many men at previous parties and she knew they would appreciate Traci's petite, hour glass figure...especially her small, round ass.

They arrived a little before 11 p.m. John Watson met them at the door and let them in with a welcoming smile. John was a muscular, athletic man in his mid 30s with broad shoulders under his tank top. He quickly eyed Traci's lithe body as Judy introduced her. John explained where drinks and food could be found, then left the women alone.

The house was filled with noise. Music, voices and laughter seemed to come from every corner. Judy and Traci proceeded to the bar. While mixing their favorite drinks, a voice called for Judy. From the door leading to the pool the women saw a couple waving to them.

"Oh, there's Linda and Tom," Judy said. "We'll be right there," she yelled to them over the din.

Linda was a tall woman in her early 30s with long, straight brown hair. The hair hung in front of her, partially covering her otherwise naked breasts. Tom was a slightly older man in a bathing suit, his arm around Linda's waist, a thumb inside her bikini bottoms.

With drinks in hand, Traci and Judy walked over to where Linda and Tom stood. Introductions were made and the four decided to sit outside by the pool and hot tub.

The area was busy with guests mingling, but the foursome was able to find a table and enough chairs for everyone to sit. Traci surveyed the patio and yard surrounding them. Large and small groups of people sat or stood in the dimly lit area. More than one couple could be seen standing with the man behind the woman, hands cupping her naked breasts, his bathing suit covered cock grinding against her ass. Beyond the pool, shadowy forms could be seen on the ground rolling on towels. At the hot tub, rules seemed to prohibit anybody entering with a bathing suit on.

Traci saw Judy eyeing what appeared to be a student in his early 20s entering the tub, his thick cock swaying freely as he stepped in. When the young man sat down, women on both sides kissed him, their hands out of sight.

Traci's and Judy's attention was brought back to their table when Tom said, "I'm glad you could make it Judy. I hope you plan on taking your usual swim before you leave."

"Yes, Tom. I'll take my shirt off for you if you want," Judy said smiling. Tom laughed.

Small talk was exchanged and Tom offered to get new drinks for everyone. Traci and Judy agreed on refills and Tom disappeared into the house. He returned a few minutes later and handed the drinks around. He watched the women and smiled.

About fifteen minutes later, he said, "Let's go inside. I want to show Traci some of the special rooms they have in there. You'll love this." Traci looked at Judy, who smiled and nodded.

They moved toward the house, weaving through the crowd with drinks in hand. Traci immediately felt lightheaded, but passed it off as strong drinks. By the time they got to the door, she had difficulty finding the step up. She bumped into Judy, who said with a slur, "Oops, I lost my balance." They staggered into the house and the noise, both seeing a whirling blur of light.

"This way," they barely heard Tom say. He was walking in front of them, looking back. Linda trailed behind. They entered a hallway and Traci instantly felt claustrophobic. She reached out with her free hand and touched the wall. Judy stumbled over Traci's foot and nearly fell. Their drinks splashed over the edge of the glasses. Neither could focus further than three feet in front of them.

They followed Tom into a large, dimly lit bedroom. Both Traci and Judy grabbed the nearest piece of furniture to hold themselves up.

"Here," Tom said to Traci. "Take a drink." He took the drink from Traci's hand and put it to her mouth. Instinctively, or without the ability to refuse, Traci drank. He did the same with Judy.

Setting the drinks on top of the dresser Traci leaned against, he took her arm and led her to the side of the king size bed in the room. "Sit down," he said.

Traci obeyed. Her body went limp and her eyes began to close. Linda, meanwhile, had walked Judy to the opposite side of the bed and sat her down.

Tom looked at Traci and said, "Traci, I'll let you sleep but you need to get undressed first. OK?"

Traci nodded, but said nothing.

"Judy, can you hear me?" Tom asked.

"Yes," Judy said faintly.

"Can you do me a favor and get undressed so you can lay down?"

Judy nodded her head.

"OK, girls. Go ahead and start undressing. Linda and I will be here to help you," Tom said.

Without hesitation, both women began stripping. Judy pulled her tank top over her head, revealing a pair of firm, round tits. Traci had worn a bikini under her t-shirt. It covered a small portion of her ample, tanned breasts. She unsnapped and unzipped her shorts before sliding them down her legs. Tom grabbed them around the knees and pulled them off, along with Traci's shoes. Traci reached behind her and struggled with the bikini top's tie strings. She managed to pull it open and slipped out of the top. Her breasts, while not as large as Judy's, were nicely shaped with erect, pink nipples.

Judy removed her shorts and panties with help from Linda. Traci lowered her bikini bottoms until they slid down her legs and to the floor. Tom stared intently at the closely shaven, pale colored area around her pussy. Her hips and thighs were silky smooth and deeply tanned.

"Good," Tom said enthusiastically. "Now, go ahead and lay down."

The women simultaneously swung their legs up to the bed, scooted toward the pillows and lay on their backs. Traci could make out figures around the bed, but could not focus on faces. Her body felt warm. Tingling sensations ran through her legs and arms. She moved her fingers over her thighs, enjoying the light touch.

She and Judy heard Tom's voice through the fog that surrounded them. "Can you touch your breasts, girls?"

As if controlled by a machine, their hands moved to their tits and they began kneading them gently.

"Good. Does it feel good to squeeze your nipples?"

Both women put their nipples between thumb and forefinger and manipulated them. "Oh, yes," Judy murmurred.

"Does that make you horny?" he asked.

Traci nodded in consent. Judy moved her right hand down to her pussy and massaged her clit.

"Traci," Tom said softly. "Play with your pussy for me."

Traci's legs separated slightly. Her hand found her pussy lips and followed them up to her clit. She slid her middle finger up and down until stopping on top of her clit. She made small circular motions over it, moaning softly.

During this process of self-arousal, Tom and Linda had stripped and a couple other guests had entered the room. Tom stood naked on Traci's side of the bed, his cock already semi-erect. He ran his fingers over it as Traci played with herself. He leaned forward and put his hand over her left tit. He traced around the base of her tit before cupping nearly the entire thing in his big hand. He squeezed it several times before once again stroking his cock, bringing it to full erection.

He climbed onto the bed and placed himself between Traci's legs. In a brief moment of reduced but clear awareness, Traci struggled to get out from under the object above her. But Tom grabbed her wrists and pinned them against the bed beside her head. He lowered his head and put his mouth over her left tit.

"No, no," she panted.

Tom sucked on the nipple, running his tongue back and forth over it. Traci's young breast flattened against her chest with the force of his mouth closing over it again. He licked her nipple harder. It was growing longer with each attack of his tongue and Traci's struggling was subsiding.

He moved to the other breast and pressed his entire body down onto hers. His hard cock lay between their flattened stomachs. Judy looked on from just a couple feet away, unable to comprehend what was happening next to her.

Traci was moaning softly now as Tom licked her right nipple. "Reach down and hold my cock," he whispered into her ear. He let go of her right hand and it found his thick cock between them. "Stroke it," he said, raising his mouth off her breast.

Traci's arm worked mechanically on his cock. Tom raised his body slightly to allow her better access.

"Put it on your clit," he told her. He moved down the bed a few inches so she could place the cock on her clit. With her hand still on top of his stiff cock, he moved up and down across the top of her pussy. Traci's eyes were closed and her mouth open, her breathing getting heavier and heavier.

Next to Tom and Traci, a naked student appearing to be in his early 20s was sliding between Judy's legs. His extraordinarily thick cock was fully erect, nearly touching his stomach. When the boy was in position and put his mouth on one of Judy's expansive breasts, she seemed to awaken and protested by hitting him in the side with fisted hands. The boy simply grabbed her wrists and stretched them over her head. With one quick motion, one wrist was handcuffed, the cuffs fed through the headboard railing and the second wrist cuffed.

When Judy cried out, "Stop, no!" Traci seemed to sense her surroundings better. She let go of Tom's cock and pushed up against his body. But he didn't budge. He simple moved his cock to the entrance to her pussy and inserted the tip into her. He could feel her wetness and warmth. One more quick thrust and he was inside her. Traci put her hands behind Tom's neck and hit him repeatedly.

"No, no," she breathed hoarsley.

Tom began fucking her more vigorously and Traci spread her legs involuntarily. The bed rocked with his movement. Judy was squirming under the boys oral attacks on her breasts, which swayed in rhythm with Tom's motion. Quickly, the boy positioned himself and drove his huge cock into her cunt. Judy moaned and arched her back. The boy plunged into her again, and she fell to the bed.

Traci was now gripping the back of Tom's neck with her fingers. Her long nails left red marks wherever they made contact with his tan skin. Tom reached down and pulled her legs up and placed them by his hips. Traci wrapped them around him, feeling just enough of the pleasure of his cock in her to want more. He obliged by ramming into her repeatedly, his balls slapping against her ass.

The boy next to them had, likewise, lifted Judy's knees and was penetrating her at a rapid rate. When he paused to lay on top of her while completely buried in her cunt, Judy pushed her hips upward and back to the bed attempting to continue the fuck session. The boy eventually started to pump her again, grunting loundly with each thrust.

Traci had moved her hand between herself and Tom and was playing with her clit. Within minutes, she was moaning more loudly. Her face showed the strain as she fought between repulsion and pending orgasm.

"Aaahhhhh, yes. Oooohhhhhhhh," Traci cried out.

She bit her lower lip and screamed again as her back arched off the bed. Tom placed his hands under her ass and pulled her up farther. He pounded into her and she clasped her hands behind his neck, trying to hang on.

"oh, oh, umh, ummmmm," signalled the beginning of her orgasm. In her mind she was screaming, but those in the room simply heard the moans of a woman releasing entirely. Her body shook with each surge of her orgasm, causing Tom to climax as well. He grunted even louder than Traci, driving his cock deep inside her. Long, white shots of his cum entered her womb. Over and over he shoved her down onto the bed, plunging his cock and his sperm into her.

The combined noise and rocking next to him caused the boy to erupt. He pulled out of her and stroked himself. The first string of cum reached her neck. The second spurt landed on her right breast, trailing a line of cum over her nipple and down her stomach. Three more shots landed on her breasts and stomach.

Tom and Traci both were collapsed on the bed, his limp cock laying on her thigh.

When the boy was finished coating Judy's front side with his cum, he stepped off the bed and was replaced by Linda. She immediately buried her face in Judy's pussy. Pushing Judy's legs farther apart, Linda began licking from Judy's cunt to her clit. Several more strokes over the clit caused Judy to stiffen her legs and shriek, "Oh, yes, there...there. That's it."

She pulled violently against her restraints and yelled again as she began to cum. Linda pressed harder against Judy, putting her entire mouth over the clit and sucking hard. Her tongue worked it feverishly as Judy experienced a body numbing orgasm. Joices flowed from her cunt as she gyrated in all directions around Linda's mouth. She began humping Linda's face until the last of the orgasms left her limp. She jerked in response to Linda's continued licking, but she was spent.

The women would wake up later, each covered in thick, white cum. Neither would remember the evening. Both would consider returning.

What's with the Related Links? (-1, Offtopic)

TheTomcat (53158) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505128)


Related Links
Ad: PriceGrabber
Ad: PriceGrabber
Ad: PriceGrabber
Ad: PriceGrabber
Ad: PriceGrabber
... etc

??

S

Re:What's with the Related Links? (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505148)

What Timothy wants to say yis that he wants to be an AssGrabber. He likes you, TheTomcat.

Re:What's with the Related Links? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505161)

They must have embedded some extended Perl.

Re:What's with the Related Links? (1)

sulli (195030) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505180)

Bug? You might want to email the Editor or Sourceforge.

Re:What's with the Related Links? (2, Informative)

jamie (78724) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505298)

It's a bug. I'm fixing it.

Re:What's with the Related Links? (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505372)

could you "fix" CmdrTaco while you're at it?

Thanks,
Kathleen F.

Re:What's with the Related Links? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505458)

You're going about this all wrong.... The correct response should have been "It's not a bug, it's a feature."

Re:What's with the Related Links? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505300)

Ad: ... Ad: Profit!

FAGGOTS ARE RUINING THIS SHITTY BLOG (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505145)

    • WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

      that's a lot of w's

      nig

      Lameness filter encountered. Post aborted!

      Reason: Don't use so many caps. It's like YELLING.

YOU ARE WRONG (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505275)

Gay men are the only fucking reason I come back to this fucking wanksite.

XS Isn't the only way. (5, Informative)

gorilla (36491) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505155)

For many applications, you might find it easier to use Inline::C [cpan.org] or SWIG [cpan.org] . Neither gives you the total power that XS does, but they're much easier to get into.

Re:XS Isn't the only way. (3, Informative)

Hornsby (63501) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506563)

And thank god it's not! XS can be a royal PITA. The marriage of Perl and C is a shotgun wedding at best, and it seems that the groom is wasted before the ceremony even starts.

Python makes it much easier to interact with C libraries, and Ruby has the nicest C library support of all. Also, for embedding a program language into an application, why not use Scheme? It was designed to be embedded from the beginning and should impose much less overhead. Since it's a functional language, it's also very well suited for AI, which makes it a good choice for games and such.

I'm not knocking Perl. It has a special place in my heart as the first language I really learned; however, it's best used for what it's really good at, and that's scripting.

Perl and C relationship summed in 1 word: (2, Funny)

b_pretender (105284) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505156)

gperf

embed your perl cream in my tight ass, sport (-1)

Sexual Asspussy (453406) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505157)

I was always an avid reader. Now I had broken up with my girlfriend, I had more time to read.

I shared a flat with my mate James. He worked for a local software house, whereas I was a student. I was home most of the day and he came home late. Both of us were in the same position however, his girlfriend had left him to go to America not one month ago.

About a week ago, James came into my room. "Mate, I'm bored shitless. Have you got a book I can read?"

"Yeah sure," I said, and reached over for one from the shelf. I chose one at random, not really thinking about what it was about, or its implications.

"Cheers." He said, and left.

Now a week later, James was back in my room.

"Strange book that mate." He said.

I took it off him. "What was it? Oh, I haven't read it yet. Most of these books are ones I picked up at a jumble. What was it about?"

"About a guy finding his sexual orientation."

"Ah." I said. How embarrassing. "Okay. Sorry about that."

He shrugged. "Never mind." He said, and wandered back into his room.

I thought over what he said. I had never ever had sex with a guy. I thought about it once or twice, but never wanted to try it. I picked up the book I had lent him, and skipped through it. I stopped at one part where the main character asked to try gay sex with his best friend; his excuse was that no one would find out, because they would keep it to themselves, and at least they knew that they were both clean, and nothing to worry about.

I put the book down, and walked into James' room.

"Erm, ah, you know that book?" I asked.

He looked as if he knew what I wanted. "Yes?"

"Have you ever thought about doing something like that? I mean, trying it...once, with your mate? You know, it wouldn't be gay would it, we'd only be trying, and we both know we still love girls, it would just be trying, wouldn't it?" I said, nervously.

"Huh, yeah, I suppose I thought about it when I read that book. I thought you gave it to me for that reason. Haha."

"Ha, yeah, well, I didn't. Erm...do you want to try it?" I asked.

"Yeah, okay. But let's just sit and watch some porn or something and then see how we go on."

"Okay, should I go and get a cassette? From the local?"

"Yeah, go for it."

So I quickly ran down to the local porn shop to rent a video. I found a gay one that looked fairly decent and one bi one and handed them to the girl on the counter.

"Are you a member?" She asked.

"No, how do I join?"

She handed me a form. "I need something to prove you are eighteen, and you must fill out this form."

I handed her my driving licence, which she approved, and filled out the form.

"Oh, Gay Lovers in Action, and Bi-sexual Lingerie Fantasies. You bi-sexual then?" She asked. Why was this twenty-year-old girl questioning me?

"Errr...no, not exactly." I replied.

She smiled and stroked my cheek. "You don't need to be ashamed you know. I'm bi-sexual too. I'd love to meet a guy who would fuck me while he was being fucked up the ass."

Now she was turning me on. "Maybe I could come round and join you one day?" She continued. "And look, bi-sexual Lingerie Fantasies. So you like transvestites, or you are a secret tranny?"

"No, I'm not." And to be honest, I never even thought of it.

"Well, if I can come round one day, I'll bring some really sexy underwear for you and your boyfriend to try on. Maybe you'll like it, and you'll become a tranny. What do you think?"

"Erm, well I don't know. I'll let you know." I was really interested in getting this girl back to the flat one day, but only because she was drop dead gorgeous! Tall, thin, long black hair, which she kept pushing behind her left ear, and an innocent smile.

"Well, enjoy the films. Don't shag too much." She said.

I said thanks and left.

When I got home, I told James what happened. He laughed it off, saying it was definitely only a one-time thing and that I would have to find another boy to share with the girl.

James put in the film called Bi-sexual Lingerie Fantasies. It was only 5 minutes in and I was rock hard. I wasn't sure if it was thanks to the film or the fact that I would be making love to the guy sitting next to me. Either way, none of us had the nerve to make the first move.

As we watched one transvestite dressed in sexy green lingerie fuck another transvestite in a red corset up the arse while another licked out a woman, I decided to go for broke. I unzipped James' trousers and pulled them off. James got all-tense. I lifted off his t-shirt, leaving him in only his boxers.

I got undressed completely. Then I pulled out James' rigid penis and started to play with it. He was really nervous.

"I think we'd both better just relax." I reassured him. "Think about it James. We are both clean, we are both really turned on by this, and nobody can find out! Can they?"

I relaxed a bit. "No they can't."

"So, we can try this just the once. At least we can say to ourselves we've done it, and we know what it's like!"

"Okay." James reached over and started to pump my nine-inch penis. James had a similar size to me, just a bit thinner.

We watched the film a bit, tugging at each other's dicks. Then James leaned over and kissed my lips. It was just like a female kiss, but the whole feeling of kissing another boy made we shiver with excitement. I worked my way down his neck, kissing and sucking. When I reached the join of his neck to his shoulder I sucked harder, at the same time I pumped his penis harder. He suddenly shuddered, wrapping his arms around my back pulling my face harder into his neck. He came hard, pumping cum all over my hand and body.

We kissed again while I pumped the last of his cum out of his dick, then he suddenly pulled away.

"I can't do this." He said, pulling as far away as possible.

"Mate, have you ever dreamt about something while wanking, and then after you came, you thought, 'god, why did I think about that??'?" I asked.

"Yeah, I did." He replied.

"Well that's this! It's just a feeling, it's just hormones. If you come back to me here, and let me continue to rub you, you'll feel good again. You just have to beat the hormones!" He thought about it, then came back over to me.

I started to rub his cum all over his body. Nipping at his neck. On the TV, we watched two transvestites in really sexy satin chemises; fuck a woman in her pussy and mouth, while another transvestite took the man fucking the woman's pussy up the arse.

James started to respond. His dick was already hard again, and now he was rubbing me all over. I moved my mouth down to his nipples and sucked on them.

"Sorry about that Paul." He said.

I looked up at him. "No problem sweetheart." I smiled, as if it was a joke. He smiled back.

"Those transvestites are actually pretty sexy." He said.

"Well, you still have your ex-girlfriend's clothes here. Maybe after this, if we want to experiment a bit more, we can try them on?" I replied.

He smiled. "Yeah, that'd be cool."

I kissed him on the lips, and our tongues mingled for a few minutes. Then I moved down his body, and put his penis, which was still covered in his cum, into my mouth. The cum tasted slightly salty, but not as bad as most girls made out. I bobbed up and down on his cock, running my tongue along.

James dropped his head back. "My god, this is the best blowjob ever!!"

I continued sucking until he start shuddering again. He grabbed my head and forced it further onto his dick. "Uuuuaarrrggghhhh!!!!!!!!!!" He screamed as jets of cum hit the back of my throat. I sucked out more and more and tried to swallow as much as possible. Eventually I sat back and smiled at James, cum dripping from the side of my mouth. I pushed it back into my mouth and swallowed.

"What was it like?" James asked.

"It actually tasted quite nice!" I replied. "And I enjoyed sucking your cock. I think I'll continue doing this in the future. Only with you though, if you don't mind."

He smiled, "no, that was nice. You can blow me any time you like. I've got that feeling again, but not as bad as last time."

I kissed him on the lips and held him tight. "Don't worry, it'll go away."

And it did. The film had finished, so James went to put the other one in. We started to watch it. It was a group of young guys swimming suddenly have a gang-bang.

My hard-on still hadn't gone down, and now James was hard for a third time. James said it was his turn to blow me. He went down on my dick and sucked and licked, trying to imitate my moves. It felt brilliant as I ran a hand through his hair. At the same time, I took in what was going on in the film. The studly cleanly shaven boys were all having anal sex.

"Oh my god. Ah baby I'm gonna come! Yes James baby suck me!" Then in an instant I filled his mouth with my come. I suddenly felt that feeling James had, that this was wrong, but I overcame it by grabbing James and kissing him, hard. I tasted my come in his mouth, even though he had swallowed most of it.

"You called me baby." He said, smiling as he held me tight, resting his head on my shoulder.

"Yeah, I was taken in my the moment." I apologised.

James laughed. "I don't mind," he ran a hand through my hair, then pulled me towards him. "That was quite nice. I enjoyed that. Okay, so I think we can give each other blowjobs from now on, okay?"

"Yeah, sure." I said, smiling.

"And you, sweetheart;" James ran a finger down the crack of my ass, and started rubbing my hole. He worked it slightly in and out. "Can call me baby anytime when we're doing it."

I beamed. "Okay baby."

He pushed his middle finger all the way up me as we kissed. We turned to watch the screen. It focused in on one of the guy's dicks going in and out of the man's arse.

"That guy is very beautiful." James said. "You ready to do it?" He got up and pulled out a tube of KY Jelly from a drawer. As he walked back over to me, I looked at his long penis sticking out at full mast. "Get on all fours and face the telly."

I got into the position he said; my penis was hard again. He got back on the bed and positioned himself behind me. Then he squeezed a large amount of KY onto his fingers, and worked it up my bottom, then on his penis. As I watched six guys fucking on the telly, I felt the tip of James' penis press against my hole. I tried to relax as much as possible, but as the head of his penis went inside me, I cried out in pain. James asked if he should stop, but I told him to go on.

He pressed another two inches in, and asked if I was okay.

"Yeah, it hurts, but now in a weird way. It's quite nice. Keep going." I said.

I felt filled up as he pressed what felt like another five inches in. Then I felt his body touching my buttocks.

"I'm all the way in." he announced.

"Then fuck me babe, fuck me!" I shouted.

He pumped in and out of me, god I was in heaven! It felt so good, I didn't want it to end. My penis was buzzing. I tried to turn my head to see James' expression. He was smiling.

"How's it feel Paul?"

"OH! UNBELIEVABLE!!!" I screamed!

"Ah honey, for me too!!!"

He bucked and rode me hard. Then he pulled out and turned me over. I put my legs on his shoulders and he pushed back into me. Once he was fully inside, he leaned over and we kissed. Then he kept on pumping, faster and faster.

"Oh baby. Yeah Paul, baby. OH I LOVE YOU!!!" He came inside me. I could feel his warmth splattering my insides! He collapsed on top of me. I stroked his hair and back as I could feel his penis shrink. "How was it Paul?" He kissed my neck and ears.

"It was great!" I replied.

"Sorry about the love you thing, heat of the moment, you know?"

"Hey, don't worry about it babe. We're lying here together, you've just taken my virgin ass, so I don't think it matters."

"Cool. My turn!" Said James.

I turned him over to face the telly and KYed his hole, rubbed some on my dick, and started to press against his hole. On the TV, two guys were making love side by side on a bed, it was such a turn on. I pressed harder against James' hole and went in. James shrieked in pain, but I ignored it, I knew what would come next. I continued to push, inch after inch, till I was completely in. Then I started to pump in and out of him.

"Oh, god, that's so good." He said.

I continued to fuck him, at the same time, I wanked his penis. I couldn't believe it, he came all over my hand really quickly. Where was he storing all this cum???

I licked most of the cum off my fingers, and fed some to James. Then I felt my orgasm come. I felt like I had burst something, because a massive amount of come filled James' insides, all the time I could feel his own cum run out of my arse.

"Baby, that felt amazing!!!" James said, as he pulled off my penis and jumped on top of me. He hugged me and kissed me all over. "Let's keep doing it, just you and I. You can move in to this room and we can sleep together. Nobody needs to know."

I held him tight and kissed his forehead. "Sure James. I'd love to be your boyfriend."

We kissed and made love all night, this time with no hesitation or nervousness.

We woke up in each other's arms the next morning. It was a Saturday, so no work, and more time for loving! We spent the first hour of the morning having oral sex, and generally cuddling. Then we had a bath together.

While I was eating breakfast, James got a large box down from the cupboard.

"This is all Susan's stuff. I spoke to her recently, saying I was going to throw it away. She said do it, so officially it's our to do with as we please. She took as much as she could with her to the States."

We opened the box. There were some towels, some old books and underneath all that were all her clothes.

I pulled out a pair of red leather trousers, and a rubber tank top. James found the matching rubber skirt. There were plenty of sexy clothes for us to try on; different types of blouse, skirts, tops. Then we found the pot of gold, her underwear bag. She'd obviously taken only her normal underwear, because all her sexy underwear was still there.

James held up a scarlet lacy teddy with suspender straps. "God, I never knew she owned this stuff."

I found myself a dark green basque, with matching sheer stockings. I put them on.

"Hmm...sexy, but I think we should shave our body hair first." James said.

So we did. Then we put on our newfound clothes. First we admired ourselves in the lingerie, then we put on a sexy blouse and skirt. We looked amazing. We felt amazing.

"This feels so nice." James said.

I walked over to him, and we kissed, feeling each other in our new clothes.

"I have to go and return those videos." I said.

"Like that???" He asked.

"No silly. But I will wear the underwear I'm wearing now."

"Won't it be visible under your t-shirt?"

"I'll wear a coat. What about that girl?"

"Try and get her to come round."

I got changed, keeping on the basque and suspenders, and went back to the adult video store. Sure enough, the girl was still there.

"Ah, my friend. How did you like the videos?" She asked.

I smiled. If she can flirt with me, I can back, anyway, the shop was empty.

"They gave us a few ideas. For instance." I lifted my t-shirt up to show her the sexy green lacy basque.

"Oh my god, I think I just came looking at you!" She said. "I have to have you! I have to have you dressed as a woman. Can I come round, please???"

I went behind the counter, lifted her black vinyl skirt, and plunged my fingers into her pussy. I rubbed her really hard a few times, then I got under the desk, pulled her knickers down, and licked her pussy. I continued, even when a customer came in.

"OH!" She let out.

"Excuse me?" Said the man.

"Nothing. There's this really sexy man dressed in sexy women's lingerie underneath this table licking out my pussy." She replied.

The man looked surprised. I nearly burst out laughing.

"Oh, okay." He continued looking for a video, but changed his mind and left.

I stood up, opened my fly, pulled my knickers aside and whipped out my dick. The girl backed up against the desk, and lifted her mini-skirt. In one swift movement, I was in her pussy, fucking her.

She lifted up my t-shirt, feeling the material of the lingerie on my body. Another customer came in, a woman. She saw us fucking and was about to go out when she changed her mind, came over near us, put her hand in her knickers and frigged herself.

All of a sudden the girl I was fucking orgasmed, and I came inside her.

"Quick, let me at her." She said as she jumped off me and dived between the woman's legs. She licked at that pussy like mad, then they lay on the floor and she put her pussy full of my cum over the woman's mouth. They licked at each other like crazy until both shuddered to a massive orgasm.

"Wow, I only came in for a video. This is amazing. That's what you call customer service."

We laughed. The woman left the shop, thanking us for an amazing show.

"I'm Christy." Said the girl.

"Paul, hi." We kissed. "Christy, you are welcome anytime you like at our place. When can you come?"

"Well, my shift ends in an hour, can you wait here with me?"

"Sure. I can use that time to explain about what happened last night."

So I went into detail about what happened. When I finished, Debbie, the girl who was supposed to relieve Christy had already arrived, made herself a coffee, and had listened to half of my story. I had to repeat the other half for her.

"So let me get this straight." Said Christy. "When I flirted with you last night, and you rented those videos, you were still straight?"

"Yes." I replied.

Debbie cut on. "Let me get this straight. Christy, so you're going round to there place now, to have sex with two bi-sexual transvestites, who only discovered they were bi-sexual yesterday?"

"Yes." She said.

Debbie smiled. "You lucky bitch! Give me your address Paul." I gave it to her. "I'm coming round tonight after work. I've been dying to eat Christy's pussy for ages anyway!"

Christy studied her. "Have you? Oh. Well, why didn't you?"

"Didn't know you were that way inclined."

"Cool, then it's settled." I said. "Come round tonight, and we can have one big orgy."

"Woohoo!" Debbie cried.

Christy and I stopped off at her flat to pick up some things. Then we stopped in a wig shop and bought one long curly brown haired wig, and one long straight blond for me.

When we arrived home, James was still dressed in the skirt and blouse. We made the introductions, and I got changed. Christy put the wig on James and made up his make-up. James looked really amazing now. Then Christy did mine.

Christy told us to wait on the bed. "I'm going to get ready. Today is going to be my first gay day."

When Christy returned, she was totally naked, save for the large strap-on penis she had on.

"Okay, I want to feel like you guys, so no sex in my pussy today, okay?"

"Okay."

Christy slowly began to undress us, leaving on only our lingerie. She pulled down my panties, and unclipped James' teddy.

"Now, give each other a blow job." She said.

I climbed on top of James, placed my penis at his lips, and began sucking at his. Christy began rubbing KY jelly on my hole, and pushed her dildo into me. It was unbelievable. I was being fucked up the ass by a girl, while blowing and being blown by the most beautiful boy in the world.

All of a sudden I came in James' mouth. Christy immediately jumped down to kiss him. I saw them passing the fluids between their mouths. James then positioned himself behind me and rammed his penis inside my arse. It didn't hurt because I was already well lubricated. Behind James, Christy was taking his arse.

We were all banging away when the doorbell went.

Christy went to answer. We continued to fuck.

"Hi Debbie!"

"Hi Christy, I see you have your strap-on. Have you got one for me?"

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE (-1)

Proctal Relapse (467579) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505160)

"Yeah, babe, of course. I thought you had to work."

"I phone the boss, told him business was slow and I felt ill. He told me to lock up early and go home. I was to excited to wait, so I came straight over." Debbie immediately began to strip.

"Guys, Debbie managed to get off work early." Christy announced.

"Great, come and join in the fun!" I shouted.

Debbie, now naked, was staring at the two trannies making love to each other.

"That is so sexy!"

"Hey Debs," said Christy. "No sex in the vagina today. We'll do that tomorrow. Today, is gay day. We are going to do everything up the arse."

"Sure, okay." Agreed Debbie, as she pushed the pussy dildo up her vagina, and strapped on the rest of the strap-on dildo.

"Debbie, you take James up the arse, and I'll receive from Paul."

We all gang banged like that all day, in different positions. At around eight at night, we decided to give it a rest, as our arse holes were getting sore. We cooked some dinner and watched a film on TV.

After the film, the girls decided to play dress-up. They dressed us up in lots of types of clothes.

"Paul, what do you prefer? Sex with a boy or a girl?" Christy asked.

I thought about it. "I like both just as much. But I prefer both at once." Everyone agreed that was truly the best. "James, yesterday night you told me you love me, but then quickly said it was a mistake. Well for me it isn't a mistake. I truly love you, as my boyfriend. I'm glad I've found out what gay sex is like, I'm glad it is with you, and I'm glad you are my gay lover. And Christy, I'm glad I met you. I hope you will move in with us and be my girlfriend?"

Christy kissed me. "I will."

"The same goes to you Debs, I hope you'll be my girlfriend and move in with us. We're going to need a bigger bed if four of us are to fit in here." James said.

"Yep," said Debbie, "we will won't we!"

A big smile formed on James' face as he kissed Debbie. Then he turned to hug me. We kissed passionately. Debbie climbed over and began kissing Christy, adjusting their strap-on dildos so they didn't get in the way.

"I love you too Paul." Said James. "When I read that book, I wanted to try sex with you more than anything. I never ever thought of you this way though. Now I look at you, and I see how beautiful you are. I'm so lucky to have you, my lovely baby. You have such a beautiful penis." We kissed again.

One year later

We live all together now. We actually got married. Yep. Christy and I got married the same time as Debbie and James. None of my mates know that I secretly married James too.

I have a bigger wardrobe of female clothes than male, as does James. Went we are dressed as women, James is called Jane, and I'm Paula. We often visit gay clubs, where we like to dance dressed how we feel comfortable.

One thing we find really sexy now, is when Debbie fucks my arse, and James faces me and I watch Christy fuck his arse. It's also good because we like to kiss a lot.

James and I have recently gathered enough courage to kiss in public. We all hold hands in public, and our friends are starting to know that we are bi-sexual. One or two of my friends try to avoid us now, but most are cool with it. All the female friends find it cool and really sexy.

Tomorrow night, we are planning an orgy. Some of our friends are coming round. Most of our male friends, and all of our female friends are up for it. But that's another story.

Combining C and Perl (5, Funny)

NoOneInParticular (221808) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505165)

So now we can combine the readability of both C and Perl with the elegant memory protection of C?

Related Links (-1, Redundant)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505168)

WTF is up with the PriceGrabber links under "Related Links"?

Ad: PriceGrabber
Ad: PriceGrabber
Ad: PriceGrabber
Ad: PriceGrabber
etc...

A good sells pitch for their book (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505170)

Tim Jenness and Simon Cozens should consider handing out free sandwiches.

eh? (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505175)

"Enjoy using Perl?"

Nope, I prefer using better things [python.org]

Linux on A FLOPPY DISK (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505182)

Please tell me about your experiences with Linux on a floppy disk!!!

Re:Linux on A FLOPPY DISK (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505266)

Worst operating system ever. I'd much rather have a MS-DOS 3.3 boot disk than this crap.

I'M DROWWWWNING IN CRAAAAAP (-1, Offtopic)

Yellow Brick Choad (464067) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505197)

Deanna Troi lent forward, her stomach muscle's tensing up under her lycra top. Troi enjoyed using the Enterprise gym, especially when it was just Beverly and her, they had shared a lot and they could really express themselves when working out, grunting out loud when the exercise got to much.

Troi and Beverly had been friends for many years now, both sharing a special relationship. Both Troi and Beverly being the love interests of the two commanding officers on board the Enterprise. Troi had helped Crusher develop her masturbation techniques after the captain had declined her advances, although Troi knew the captain fantasised about Beverly a lot. She often felt his eroticism when he was alone in his quarters, although that was one secret she would never let out.

But when they were working out, they were not the ship's doctor and psych, they were not the desired love object's of the captain and the first officer, they were two firm friends trying to keep their wonderful figures. Troi had always been burdened by her mother to maintain the perfect figure, despite attracting many of the males on her home planet, and now on the ship. But she never understood why Crusher worked out so much. Despite being a mother and approaching middle age, she had a wonderful figure, one which the captain, understandably, lusted after.

But Troi knew Beverly's secret, one which she had tried to kept hidden from her, even knowing Troi's mental powers. After her husband had died, Beverly had lost all interest in men. She had been with one or two a few years later, but Troi knew Beverly had grown fond of nurse Ogawa, upset when she had got married. She would have thought that the doctor was a homosexual had she not also had feelings towards the captain.

As Troi lent forward, her face was only inches from Beverly's ass, from here she could see a line of sweat soaking into the material, pulling the lycra costume up into Beverly's crack. Whether the doctor didn't realise Troi's position or did, Troi heard, and smelt, a little fart escape from Beverly's ass, the smell sweet yet tangy. Troi, for reasons she would later think about, inhaled the smell, sucking in the first taste of another women's fart.

Beverly stiffened, feeling the fart escape. She turned her head, hoping Troi hadn't seen or heard what she had just did. She was a little taken aback when she saw Troi still in her stretching position, her face only an inch from Beverly's ass, a smile on her face and her nose pushed forward. Had Troi just smelt her fart?, Beverly thought.

"Perhaps we should try Worfs throwing techniques" Beverly suggested, turning her head back and walking to the centre of the blue mat, noticing, to her surprise, a look of disappointment on Troi's face.

Beverly, like a lot of the male crew members, had lusted after Deanna at some point. Troi had been there to listen to her problems, she knew Beverly so intimately, so it was only natural that she wanted to return that closeness. In fact Troi had been the reason she had started to question her sexuality, wondering if, perhaps, a women's touch was better than a man's. But Troi was in love with Riker, so she knew that they could never be together.

"His throwing techniques?" Troi asked. Beverly nodded, watching Deanna approach her, not realising that Troi was sensing Beverly's arousal as the situation developed. Troi stopped and turned in front of Crusher.

Crusher stepped forward and pushed her body against Troi's, feeling her heat beneath the lycra suit. She wrapped her right arm around Troi's neck, simulating a position of danger on Troi's life. She pulled Troi tight against her, her large breasts pushing into Troi's back.

They stood silently like that for a moment, Troi feeling Crusher's hot breath blowing against the back of her neck. Deanna, being a betazoid and a highly sexed being anyway, was staring to become aroused herself, seeing the attraction of homosexuality. Crusher knew what she was doing, holding Deanna so close to her body they were almost together. To break the situation, Troi elbowed Crusher in the stomach, loosening the grip, and allowing her to flip Crusher over her shoulder, landing her on the mat.

Troi stood grinning as Crusher chuckled to herself, obviously unaware Troi had been practising her self defence moves. Troi reached for an imaginary phaser when Crusher kicked up, knocking the pretend weapon away and sweep kicked Troi's leg's with the other.

Troi fell forward, landing on top of Beverly, knocking the wind out her.

"Beverly, are you alright?" Troi asked, taking hold of her head, her long brown hair flowing down and mixing with Crusher's short, blond own.

Crusher would never have imagined being in this position, her body pressed tightly against Troi's. The lycra material so hot and sweaty, their tits were almost touching each other, Troi's soft hands holding Beverly's head. The doctor hoped that Troi wouldn't recognise the wet patch forming near her pussy was her own pre-cum.

Crusher opened her eyes, staring up into Deanna's. What was a moment, felt like an eternity as two close friends shared the same thought, what if we took this relationship the next step further? Beverly reached up and pushed her right hand into Troi's brown hair. She took hold of Troi's head and pulled it slowly downwards, leaning up.

The two women's lips met, both tasting a member of the same sex for the first time. The kiss continued for several moments before Troi pushed herself off Beverly's body, retreating into a corner shaking. Crusher closed her eyes for a moment, tasting Troi on her lip's, licking them clean before standing and walking slowly towards her friend.

"I can't believe you just did that" Troi said reaching for a gown, desperately trying to cover her skin tight costume to stop Crusher seeing any more of her.

"Deanna, that felt pretty mutual" Crusher said, stopping in front of Troi and reaching forward, rubbing the back of her neck where she knew one of Troi's arousal points was. Troi, briefly, moaned, her body collapsing nearly collapsing into an orgasm before she remembered that Beverly knew a lot about Betazoid physiology, enough to make Troi orgasm with just a touch. She pulled away, tightening the gown around her body.

"Come on Deanna, your species is such a highly sexed race anyway. Why else would you come to your wedding's naked?" Crusher asked. Troi backed away, leaning against the wall. Beverly stepped forward and gripped the edges of the robe, pulling it open slightly. She pushed her hand in and gripped one of Troi's breasts, feeling her nipple start to stiffen under her touch.

"Beverly don't" Troi pleaded, feeling her pussy start to juice as Beverly continued to manipulate her nipple. Beverly pushed her other hand into Troi's robe, moving it down over her body and taking hold of Troi's ass, tightening her grip and pulling her body against her own.

Beverly looked lustily into Troi's deep brown eyes, feeling the obvious arousal that Troi was emitting from her pussy. She lent forward, kissing Troi on the cheeks, on the neck, then down to her mouth, kissing Troi's soft lips until Troi responded, kissing back, their tongues finally meeting.

Troi's hands moved up Beverly's body, lifting the edge of Crusher's top, and moving her hands into Beverly's clothes, feeling her hot clammy skin, noticing that Crusher wasn't wearing a breast support. She moved her hand around Beverly's body and touched her first female breast, noticing, like her, that Crusher's nipple was erect to her touch.

Crusher sighed and moaned under Troi's touch.

"Doctor Crusher, please report to sickbay" Crusher's comm. Badge stated. She released her kiss, clear rationality suddenly returning, realising the position she was in with her best friend. Troi pulled her hand clear of Beverly's breasts, the doctor's sweat dripping off her hand. Crusher took the hand and sucked the finger's clean, never loosing eye contact with Troi before she turned, straightening her top, and leaving the gym.

Beverly had been called to treat a visiting alien, one who, as it turned out, had himself been sleeping with a male crewmember. When the male crewman had cum, ejaculating onto the alien, the semen had acted as an acid, burning against the alien's skin. Crusher, being aroused, couldn't help but think about that this example of homosexual sex between two alien males had ended so badly. While only moments earlier, she had nearly cum on Deanna's hand.

She was sure one of the female nurses had noticed her aroused state when she walked into sickbay, her skin-tight costume exposing her erect nipples. Crusher, being so turned on, had brushed her hand against the nurse's inner thigh, before walking over to put on her blue medical coat, and treating the doctor.

So now Crusher stood wiping the alien's skin clear of human semen, sterilising the wound until the alien responded, looking up at the doctor smiling. His sex partner stepped forward, dressed in his uniform. He pulled him in and kissed him passionately, crying and apologising that he had caused this pain. Crusher signalled for the room to be cleared.

"Now gentlemen, we need to talk about inter-species mating rituals" the doctor said.

Troi entered her quarters, almost running over to her bed and pulling her trousers down. They fell into a pile on the floor, soaked through with her cum and sweat, her pubic hair's pressed down. She lay back and pushed her hand between her legs, moving her fingers over her pussy, pushing them up into her pussy.

She wanked herself off slowly, quickening her pace as she realised she was so close to cuming on the sheets she would shoot a lot of her cum onto her soaking sheets. She gripped her nipple with her spare hand, rubbing it while masturbating, pulling the nipple away from her tit until it snapped down. As she was about to cum, she heard the door chime sound. It went off again, then twice more. Someone was urgent to get in, and in this position, she was going to risk her position and rank by going to the door in this state.

Crusher was taken aback as Troi opened the door half naked, her pussy dripping sweat and cum, some rolling down her legs and thighs, a bit down her wrist. Clearly, she had been wanking herself off, hopefully over Crusher and the experience they had just shared. Troi's cum dripping hand reached up and gripped her hair, pulling Crusher into her quarters. Before the door shut, Crusher heard a feminine gasp and realised someone had seen her pulled into Troi's quarters.

"Deanna are you sure this is what you want to do?" Beverly asked, feeling Troi's hands begin to pull her top off. Her breasts dropped down, realising this was the first time that anyone had seen her exposed chest, including the slight age lines that were forming on her chest. Troi lent in and held one of Crusher's tits, licking the nipple.

"Shall we sit and talk first?" Deanna said grinning, releasing the breast. Crusher took hold of Troi's hand and placed it back on her tit, feeling Troi's fingers once more begin to rub her nipples taking the other hand and place it on the edge of her trousers.

Troi pushed her hand down Crusher's clothes, feeling the smooth surface. Troi was impressed that the doctor kept her pubic hairs shaved, although she would know that a shaved crotch was more hygienic. Crusher's leg's parted for her hand, allowing Troi to feel her pussy. It was slightly looser, and larger, than Troi's, the effect of giving birth to Wesley. It was slightly like her mothers cunt, one which she had seen many times in her childhood at large family events.

Crusher reached down and pulled her trousers down, standing naked in front of Troi. With the door still unlocked, any visitors now might have cost them both their jobs and commissions. But Crusher didn't care. She was a woman, a human woman who had needs and now this beautiful Betazoid was about to fuck her. Crusher pulled Troi's top off, exposing the alien's large breasts, exposing her brown nipples stiff and erect.

The two friends and officers of the USS Enterprise stood naked and aroused, neither knowing what to do as they were both experiencing each other for the first time.

Perl 5 API??? (3, Insightful)

mustangdavis (583344) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505216)

"Still following a logical and constant order, we explore the Perl 5 API, learning how to post and retrieve information to the variable types explored in the previous chapter."


Isn't Perl 6 coming out soon?

Maybe the author should have held off releasing this book ... he might have been able to make more $$$ selling a Perl 6 book rather than another Perl 5 book (since every good programmer has a half dozen Perl 5 books anyways)

Re:Perl 5 API??? (3, Interesting)

gorilla (36491) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505330)

Perl 6 is still being designed, and is expected to be at least 18 to 24 months away from the first version. It would then take a period of at least a year before it was production ready.

Re:Perl 5 API??? (5, Informative)

Reality Master 101 (179095) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505331)

Isn't Perl 6 coming out soon?

"Soon"? Considering that they haven't even finished [perl.org] deciding the features and changes of Perl 6, I think it's safe to say that a release version is at least a few years off, with 50% adoption being another three years plus after that.

Re:Perl 5 API??? (2, Informative)

WWWWolf (2428) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505332)

True, Perl 6 is coming, but the shape of the language is still being discussed, the virtual machine isn't doing that much yet, and there's not really anything substantial yet... it may take a year or two until Perl 6 is out (not sure about the developers' actual schedule, though).

As far as I know, there's not many (if any?) books that discuss the XS or Perl embedding. It sure isn't covered that widely in the Camel or Ram, and the only reference has been "go RTF 'perldoc perlxs'"... =)

And most importantly, the Perl 6 folks have not said a word about how XS and embedding stuff works in Perl 6. (I suspect that it will be radically different, because of the Parrot...)

Re:Perl 5 API??? (3, Informative)

MarcoAtWork (28889) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505341)

Some observations:

Maybe the author will make more $$$ releasing the perl 5 book now, and the 'revised' perl 6 version next year :)

Also don't forget the sometimes extremely long lead times for book publishing, it is entirely possible that the author finished this book 6+ months ago.

And last but not least, yeah, perl 6 is going to come out soon, but do you really think I'm going to use it for production code right away? I really don't think so, perl 5 will be the tool of choice for quite a while longer.

Re:Perl 5 API??? (5, Informative)

hamsterboy (218246) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505355)

AFAIK, Perl 6 is a whole other beast. It's a complete rewrite, with changes to the core language.

You'll still be able to run your Perl 5.x scripts under 6, but not vice-versa. Thus, with all the existing Perl 5.x scripts existing in the wild, having a Perl 5 book around may still be handy.

If you like analogies: why would you buy a C book when C++ has been around for years?

-- Hamster

Re:Perl 5 API??? (2, Insightful)

thelenm (213782) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505368)

Isn't Perl 6 coming out soon?

We all hope so, but it's not necessarily going to be released even in the next year or two. In the meantime, Perl 5 is more widely used than ever. And even after Perl 6 does come out, it will take a long time for people to switch over, assuming they do decide to switch. Heck, there's still a lot of Perl 4 code out there even though Perl 5 has been out for... like 8 years?

You are an idiot (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505393)

Maybe YOU should have held off making this POST

Re:Perl 5 API??? (2)

fanatic (86657) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505681)

Isn't Perl 6 coming out soon?

Only for certain values of "soon". My recollection is that estimates were that it would begin to be available in some useable form after 2 years (this was probably a year ago). I think it will be much longer before it's production ready, though that's just a guess, and several more before perl5 goes away.

Re:Perl 5 API??? (3, Interesting)

hondo77 (324058) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506019)

...every good programmer has a half dozen Perl 5 books anyways.

I do have a half dozen Perl books and I barely survived my first foray into XS. Maybe this book can help me go back and get it right.

Perl: Fitting into the Big Picture (-1, Troll)

Microsoft Research (619409) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505221)

I have friends who are nearly experts at working with Perl and consider it a powerful and very expressive language.

However, now that languages like Java and, more recently, C#, are out, I'm curious as to where Perl fits into the big picture. Sure, Perl is almost like a glue language that can piece low-level and high-level code together, but to some extent so are Java and C#.

What I'm asking is, essentially, the following: "When C# does everything that Java does, and Java does everything that C++ does, and it all runs on any platform and is amazingly documented with code examples and Web-based forums for assistance with any questions that come up, why should I learn a very complex language that's primarily used for scripts on Open-Source platforms like Linux and Solaris?"

Re:Perl: Fitting into the Big Picture (2)

benedict (9959) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505254)

Well, I learned it so I could write scripts on
open platforms. ;-)

Re:Perl: Fitting into the Big Picture (2, Funny)

zentigger (203922) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505310)

...When C# does everything that Java does, and Java does everything that C++ does, and it all runs on any platform and is amazingly documented with code examples and Web-based forums for assistance with any questions that come up...


When that happens it will be just about time for the second coming!

Re:Perl: Fitting into the Big Picture (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505311)

Perl is a great fit for scripting languages, but for complex programs, you are better off using C or C++ and libraries that simulate perl functions (regexp, etc...). On the web? Java has containers that are easy to use datastructures, so you can make things like hashes in perl, and Java1.4 has a regexp library.

Re:Perl: Fitting into the Big Picture (5, Informative)

sohp (22984) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505407)

Java does everything that C++ does

Uh, no. Thanks for playing. There are things that C++ does that Java does not -- some of which I'm thankful do not exist in Java (preprocessor) and some of which I miss (generics). But despite its C-like syntax and superficial resemblances (finalizers seem like destructors but aren't) Java is more like Smalltalk than C++.

Take a quick gander the section For C, C++ Fans [sun.com] in Peter van der Linden's Java Programmers FAQ [afu.com]

But then, why am I arguing over the relative merits of Perl, Java, C++, and C# with a user having the handle "Microsoft Research" who posts pure FUD?

Re:Perl: Fitting into the Big Picture (0)

Microsoft Research (619409) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505494)

I posted a simple question to which there should be a simple answer given in the same polite, non-offensive term that it was asked.

Instead, I was given a half-correct answer by someone with a bad attitude who considers my appropriate and candid question to be Fear, Uncertainty, & Doubt.

Perhaps you should put down your C++ manual and pick up an Oxford English dictionary.

Re:Perl: Fitting into the Big Picture (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4506488)

the best you can come up with is MACROS?
how about C++'s wonderful GUI system?
how about C++'s awesome RPC code?

ok, ok, you say you could write them - just as java programmers have written macro processors

Re:Perl: Fitting into the Big Picture (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505942)

> why should I learn a very complex language

Good thing we have simple languages like C#, Java and C++!

Re:Perl: Fitting into the Big Picture (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4506032)

Because someday you might want to be on "Open-Source platforms" and use a language that doesn't suck ass.

CRAPFLOODING IS EASY, COOL AND FUN (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505223)

My name is Josh and I am a limo driver for a company in California. I'm about 6'3" and pretty well built for having as lazy a job that I do, but in High School my main concern was sports, and since I was good, but not great, that didn't leave much in the way of colleges. So I became a limo driver.

It's bad at all though actually, it pays decent, especially when you start to get into some of the higher profile customer. After you do a couple of graduations and weddings and things of that sort, and get a couple of recommendations, soon you're on your way to bigger and better things. Which was where I was headed in this story.

It was my first big job, and what a big one it was. Britney Spears had just put on a concert in Sacramento, my job was to pick her up and take her to her nice hotel on the outskirts of the town. Usually they tell you not to talk to the celebrity unless they talk to you, but I was sure this wouldn't be so easy, either that or I would be to star struck to say anything even if she wanted me to.

I arrived at the back entrance of the arena at about 11:15, an hour after the concert was over and all the media who knew about the back entrance had left since it was too late to get something for their nightly news. About five minutes after I got their Britney walked out.

If humanly possible she is hotter in person then when you see her on TV, or in magazines or videos. She was only about 5'3", which made her beautiful perky tits look even bigger. Her blonde hair was down and she had a little shake in her walk.

All she had on was a tight little pink tube top and a short jean skirt. It seemed to take forever before she got to the car and I opened the door for her. She smiled at me and said hi, I responded with a nice to meet you and closed the door behind her and walked back to the driver's side and got in.

As soon as I got in I looked back at my hott passenger. I couldn't believe I was giving her a ride, It was about 30 minutes to her hotel and I'm sure this would be the greatest 30 minutes of my life if I just got to look at her. Little did I know I would do much more then that.

I must have been staring a little bit because Britney looked up and caught my eye and smiled. "So, next stop my hotel, right?"

This snapped me out a little bit, "Uh, yeah you got it, I'm Josh by the way, and I won't bother to ask your name."

She laughed a little and said, " Yeah that's good because I think I might be to tired to tell you."

I turned back around and started up the car, as we began our trip to her hotel. We had been driving about 5 minutes in silence and I was beginning to think that this job could get quite boring even if the passengers were extremely hot when Britney spoke up. " Hey, you wouldn't mind if I changed my clothes would you, I had time to change my bottom but this leather tube top can be quite uncomfortable."

My jaw dropped about a foot, but then I realized that I wouldn't be seeing any of it because I would have to close up the screen, and I was even a little bit disappointed because I'm sure she couldn't put anything on more revealing then what she already had.

"Yeah, sure." I responded and I reached up to close the window to the back.

"Oh, no, don't worry about it just no peaking." She giggled and waved for me to turn around, reluctantly I did. But I couldn't help looking up at the rear view mirror for a little peak. I looked just in time to see her reach behind herself, undo her tube top, take it off, and throw it to the side.

Her tits bounced out and they were absolutely beautiful. Almost a perfect shape and probably an upper C or lower D cup I was in heaven. Her nipples were pink and a good size but not too big. I couldn't believe what I was seeing.

She reached into her bag and pulled out a white tank top, and I smiled at the thought that she wouldn't be wearing a bra. She lifted up her arms to pull her tank top on, causing her breasts to reach perfect perkiness. She had pulled it over her face and just then looked up and saw me looking in the rear view mirror. Man, did I think I was screwed.

The tanktop still hadn't made it over her tits and was siting on top of them. She caught my eye and moved forward into the front. She leaned in over the seat towards me and whispered in a VERY sexy voice, " I thought I said no peeking," Then she smiled sexily at me and looked down. Immediately she spotted my huge hard on and her eyes widened. Then she said something I will never forget.

" Well, I wouldn't want to start a reputation of blue-balling all of my limo drivers now would I?" with that she moved all the way to the front and got down on her knees next to the steering wheel.

Then she unzipped my pants and pulled them down to my knees. She moved her little hands up to the top of my boxers pulling them down slowly, until finally my already fully erect 7 inches popped out. She grabbed onto it and looked at it for a little while, then she looked up at me and smiled and kissed the top of it.

Slowly she slid her mouth down over my head and took it all in. Then she came back up, slowly she started to speed up the pace. Her tongue swirling around my head every time up, her hot mouth taking in my entire cock, I was in heaven.

By this time I was having a little trouble driving, and I couldn't help every once in awhile looking down and seeing her beautiful sexy eyes looking back up at me as she worked my cock. She started to go really fast and I moaned a little as I could tell I was just about ready to cum. Then Britney pulled out, smiled at me and started to jack me off.

I was so aroused already that I started to cum after just a few strokes and cum squirted everywhere. First, onto her tank top which was sitting on top of her breasts, then down a little all over her tits. She aimed my cock up more and the next blasts landed all over her face getting her a nice little coating, one squirt even landed in her hair.

After that, I thought we were done, and really I had no complaints. I mean c'mon I had just gotten oral sex from possibly the hottest and most famous woman on the face of the earth. But, to my pleasure, Britney had other plans.

When she knew I was done she pulled off her tank top which was now soaked in my cum and climbed on top of my lap and sat down. "So, how was that?" she asked.

"It was incredible," I answered back, not believing I was having this conversation with Britney Spears.

She giggled at me, "Well if you have that much trouble driving when it's incredible, then maybe you should pull over now because now the real fun begins!" With that she stood up and turned around, blocking my view of the road with her tight little ass. Loving the view, but still not wanting to lose my job if I got into a crash I pulled the car to the side of the road since we we're now on a highway towards the outside of Sacramento and it was plenty dark.

Slowly she unbuttoned her jean skirt and slid it down over her ass right in front of my face, my dick once again jumped to attention. She was wearing a white lacy thong, and once the skirt was off she again slowly peeled that off too, leaving her hott ass right in front of my face.

Then the completely naked Britney Spears turned around, climbed onto my lap and slowly slid my dick into her beautiful, wet, tight, bald pussy. It felt so incredibly good, and she moaned slightly as she lowered herself on. Then she picked up the pace as she rode me harder and harder. I took a hold on her ass and guided her up and down. Her tits were bouncing in my face with ever thrust and I moved one hand from her ass onto her tit and squeezed it and massaged her nipples.

Pretty soon, we were going at an incredible pace and she was moaning so loud, and the car was shaking so fast, I was afraid that a car would stop to see what was happening. She was really yelling out now, " Ohhhhhh, Josh, mmmm, you are the best limo driver ever, God, I love your cock, O God!!"

I wasn't sure how long I could hold out but I wanted to wait at least until she came luckily I didn't have to wait to long. Her body started to shake and she sped up even more as I felt her juices start to pour out. Then she let out one last time, "Ohhhhh, God, baby I'm cummmming."

Her juices poured out everywhere and her pussy contracted even tighter around my dick, I couldn't hold it in anymore and I shot my load deep into her pussy. It was the greatest orgasm I had ever had.

Finally, we started to slow down and she pulled herself off of me and collapsed into the seat next to me. She sighed, and then smiled at me. " I guarantee your getting my recommendation!!"

interpreter for other applications (5, Interesting)

Sludge (1234) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505228)

I'm interested in using Perl as an interpreter for other applications. Or, more speficially, game scripting logic. I am confident the time has come for a scripting language to be used for NPC interactions, even in high-performance environments. However, I've never worked with Perl in such a place. I would like to. Has anyone got any performance comments about embedded Perl?

Re:interpreter for other applications (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505317)

Has anyone got any performance comments about embedded Perl?

a based Perl AI engine...

now if ever there were a more perfect oxymoron.

Re:interpreter for other applications (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505342)

I am confident the time has come for a scripting language to be used

Actually, "the time" was 15 years ago, Einstein. Though most modern developers have the brains to write their own little script engine customized to the problem at hand, instead of trying to jam in a monster like Perl.

Re:interpreter for other applications (5, Informative)

Avalonia (169675) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505491)

We use the PerlStream classes to integrate a Perl interpreter into our C++ applications - it was covered in the January 2002 C/C++ Users Journal - with great success.

Our ASCII file import parsers are written in Perl and the data read into Perl data-structures. The contents of these data structures can then be accessed directly from C++.

The code is on the web (it has some subtle C++ bugs needed fixes using the base-from-member inititialisation idiom) here [willnolan.com]

Re:interpreter for other applications (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505555)

I haven't done this with games, but in other apps. It's actually easier to go the python route IMO.

Ruby anyone? (1)

sinnetworks (566924) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506063)

I'm interested in embedding an interpreted language inside my game engine for scripting and also for my networked distributed objects system.

Right now my choice is set on Ruby. I plan of using it with my C++ engine replacing traditional ObjectViews by Ruby Objects. I've just got started on this task but already I have good hope on Ruby. dRuby (Distributed Ruby) has a 200lines networked distributed objects system that really kick ass!

Someone told me I might want to look into Boost::python binding. I also thought of Perl to do this, having done a little bit of perl scripting (mostly with MySQL). Anyone have comments on embedding Ruby with C++ ?

Re:interpreter for other applications (1, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4506966)

Perl is not the fastest embeddable interpreted language, but it ain't the slowest (TCL) either. The problem with most embedded interpreters is that you have to constantly convert to/from the native C types in your code. This can have a large performance overhead. If you do decide to embed with Perl (or other interpreted languages for that matter), keep your API as coarse-grained as possible, i.e., do most of your work in C functions and only do high-level stuff in perl.

Perl is Perl, C is C (4, Interesting)

signine (92535) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505239)

While I can think of numerous times embedding perl in my C would have made life easier, I can't think of any real reason to actually do so, it seems like a real waste of time to me. If you want to complete a project in Perl, then just do it in Perl. If you want to use C for a project, just use C. It's bad enough when people start using buggy bloated libraries, but it's worse when they give their compiler an identity crisis.

It's much like the great masters of Funk, The Parliament once said: "I've been down to the south, saw some great Funk...The Doobie Brothers...but do you want white guys all up in your Funk?"

In the same way, "I've been down through the source, I saw some great code...Perl...but do you want scripts all up in your C?"

Re:Perl is Perl, C is C (5, Insightful)

NerdSlayer (300907) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505339)

If you want to complete a project in Perl, then just do it in Perl. If you want to use C for a project, just use C. It's bad enough when people start using buggy bloated libraries, but it's worse when they give their compiler an identity crisis.

I've done this on serveral occasions... did you ever have a huge project to finish in a small amount of time that had some sort of processor-critical portion that's run alot? Well then, I would suggest writing it in Perl and then optimizing that piece in C. Works for me.

Often in the "real world" you can't have your cake and eat it, too. That's why people embed C in Perl.

Re:Perl is Perl, C is C (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505560)

This is also about embedding perl in C: "...we grab libperl.a and stuff into a C program". So prototype in perl. Write it in C. And call your perl scripts from you C application.

Re:Perl is Perl, C is C (5, Insightful)

shoppa (464619) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505369)

If you want to complete a project in Perl, then just do it in Perl. If you want to use C for a project, just use C.

But many projects need both low-level access to X/graphics/system libraries and really do benefit from the high-level approach of Perl.

In many cases, there are already libraries available that link the two together (e.g. Perl/Tk if you're writing in Perl, or associative array libraries for use from C) but it's never been a secret that you can call C code from Perl. You seem to advocate keeping it a secret.

umm... hello? (4, Informative)

Ender Ryan (79406) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505521)

There are plenty of reasons to embed Perl in C. The first thing that comes to my mind is using Perl as a scripting language for a game, which I have done. Write all the low level graphics stuff in C, then write the high level game logic in Perl.

As for C in Perl... Perl is a scripting language, it's simply not fast enough for everything, and you're going to need C to access different things, like joysticks, video, graphics libraries, etc...

Re:Perl is Perl, C is C (2, Insightful)

iamwoodyjones (562550) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505575)

Well what you could do is use PERL for checking/retrieving data properly and easily through a web page with less of a risk of buffer overflows since PERL has some great extensions to help in this process compared to another language such as C but then use another language such as C to pass that data (once it's been checked) so that the data's interpretation could be done exubrantly fast.

It's all about the right tool for the right part of the job.

Re:Perl is Perl, C is C (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505630)

PERL [cpan.org] doesn't have any extensions! It's only a guestbook and hit counter programming language.

Re:Perl is Perl, C is C (2)

Mike McTernan (260224) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505645)

I can't think of any real reason to actually do so

I agree. Scripting seems best for a quick and dirty approach, while actually writing some C or C++ takes more time and consideration. I can't see why you want to mix the two, unless of course you need some low level access to hardware that Perl doesn't offer directly...

Re:Perl is Perl, C is C (3, Interesting)

hondo77 (324058) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506052)

In my case, I wanted to use a third-party's binary-only C API from Perl. Gotta use XS.

I'm sorry (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505240)

I am posting this because some stupid motherfucker modded a previous post of mine down to -1, Offtopic. Fuck you asshole!!!

It was about 2 weeks ago and I was the only one home and my
sisters friend Sarah came over looking for my sister Heather.
"Hey Sarah, Heather will be home in about an hour, do you want to
wait?" I asked. Now, Sarah's pretty hot and she's only 2 years younger
than me.
"I guess," she said. she sat down and played on my computer. I
thought it would be pretty funny if I went and got a baby diaper out of
my room and throw it at her. so I did and we laughed.
"How do you put one of these on, anyway?" I asked.
"Well, you take these two tapes and wrap it around the waist and
tape it up," she said, but I acted like I didn't know what she was
doing.
"Here get me a doll, I'll show you," she said.
"we don't have any dolls," I said.
"Well........ uh...... just lay down, I'll show you," she
instructed. I was totally shocked.
"What do you mean, lay down?" I asked.
"Do you want me to show you or not? Now just lay down," she said.
I did and she started to take off my pants.
"First, you take off the babies pants," she said. With that I
started to get an erection.
"Wow, you have a pretty big penis," she said. "I'll take care of
this boner." she then stroked me till I came.
"Do you like this or something?" she asked.
"I don't know," I replied.
"Well, next you have to oil the diaper area, do you have any baby
oil?" she asked.
"Yeah, I keep all the supplies in that drawer," I said. She then
oiled me.
"Next, you powder up the baby," she said as she powdered me. "Now
you bring the diaper up and tape it!" she said as she taped me up. "You
just wanted me to put you in that diaper, I'm surprised it fit so
perfectly," she said.
"Yeah, I guess so, you're the only one that knows about me liking
diapers, don't tell anyone," I said.
"On one condition," she said.
"What?" I asked.
"If you let me secretly treat you like a baby whenever I want
to," she said.
"I guess that's alright," I said.
"Who's mommie's little baby?" she asked.

XS Mechanics (5, Informative)

swm (171547) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505251)

For an overview of XS, see

XS Mechanics

Re:XS Mechanics (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505608)

I modded this up, but would also like to remind submitters and editors -- "XS" is hardly a universally understood term and exactly the sort of thing that ought to be defined in the front-page blurb.

I mean, I know what Needleman-Wunsch alignment is (although the linked tutorial doesn't really explain that either) so it's not like I've never seen a computer before....

NIGTARD (0, Troll)

Yellow Brick Choad (464067) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505301)

The day was one of the most hellacious in a long time. We were doing end of the year closing at the office and I'd been working 12-14 hour days tying up loose ends. I entered the subway station at 1:45 am and waited for the 2 am train. I ran my hands through my hair and exhaled a long breath, very thankful I wasn't working the next day. The train arrived and I entered a deserted car. Slouching in a corner seat, I prepared for the 40 minute ride home. At the next stop, I noticed an attractive Spanish woman entering my car. She was about 5'6" and had dark brown hair that framed her face and rested on her shoulders. My eyes traveled down her body, appreciating her pert breasts confined in a tight white blouse and her curvaceous hips hugged by a midnight blue skirt that stopped at her knees. She glanced my way long enough for me to notice her eyes were as dark as her hair. I studied her luscious ass as she walked to the other end of the car and sat down.

I was so tired my eyes began to drift closed. When I next opened them, I looked at my watch and checked that I hadn't missed my stop. My head shot up in surprise when I noticed the pretty stranger sitting across the aisle from me. She was studying me intently and I noticed the first few buttons of her blouse were undone and her hand was inside, obviously massaging her breast. Not missing my stop was no longer on my mind. I watched the mysterious beauty as she pushed the blouse from her shoulder, exposing her right breast to my hungry stare. She kept her eyes on me as my own watched her fingers tease her hardened nipple... rolling and pinching it. I heard a low moan escape her lips over the rumble of the subway train. I straightened in my seat, attempting to relieve the pull forming between my legs.

She pulled her legs into the seat and her skirt inched up, revealing nicely tanned thighs. It took all of my resolve not to move myself into her seat and slide my hand up her skin. The fact we were on a city train was still prevalent in my mind, however, did not seem to phase her in the least. She slipped a hand between her legs and I lost sight of it in the darkness beneath the material of her skirt; but the movement of her arm left no question of what she was doing. Her head rolled back and rested on the window, her eyes drifted closed as her hand worked its magic. I was lost in her movements, waiting for her body to shake with an orgasm... when she suddenly stopped and looked at me again. Biting her lower lip, she pulled her skirt up as far as it would go and brought her knees to her chest, spreading her legs and revealing her bare nether region to me.

I licked my suddenly dry lips as her hand drifted through the neatly trimmed pubic hair and down to her rosy brown labia... slowly spreading her pussy lips as if to show me how wet she was, and I watched her essence flow down the valley leading to her ass. I imagined my tongue darting hungrily into her cunt as she began to ferociously finger her swollen clit, her moans becoming louder. She began to thrust her hips up into her hand and I found myself rotating my own hips as well. Her body began to jerk and I moaned as she let out a small cry and a climax shot through her. Her breath coming in short rasps and her eyes dark with passion, she kept her gaze on me as she brought her hand to her mouth and sucked on her fingers, licking them clean. I grabbed the back of the seat and gripped hard.

The train pulled to a stop and I glanced up to see my station. I pulled myself slowly from my seat, noticing the liberal wetness that had formed between my legs. As I walked to the car door, I watched as the Latina beauty pulled her skirt down and her blouse back together. She smiled and winked at me as I stepped out onto the platform. I turned around and looked at her through the car window. She blew me a kiss and mouthed what looked like, "Until next time..." and the train disappeared down the track.

I headed up the station steps and wondered just when "next time" would be...

Followup book coming soon... (5, Funny)

sammy baby (14909) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505303)

Look for a companion volume to be published by Microsoft Press [microsoft.com] entitled, "Embracing and Extending Perl."

My $0.02 (4, Informative)

dknj (441802) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505316)

This book explains how to expand the functionality and usefulness of the Perl programming language. This guide delves into the complex issues of using real code examples from the Perl source. Detailed is how to use Perl from C programs, such as writing interfaces to C libraries, implementing Perl callbacks for C libraries, and passing Perl hashes and arrays between Perl and C. Additionally, developers are provided with an API reference for the internal C interface to Perl and a reference on the typemap system.

It's amazing how much this book covers: Not only does Sam Tregar show how object-oriented Perl modules are architected, how to write regression test suites, how to extend Perl modules with C code, but he gets also the community aspects right -- how does your module get really popular? You can tell that Sam is a successful Perl module author himself.

-dk

Re:My $0.02 (4, Informative)

chromatic (9471) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505580)

You seem to be thinking of Writing Perl Modules for CPAN [slashdot.org] . There are similarities, but the Jenness/Cozens book goes into more detail about XS than the Tregar book. That's to be expected.

Real developers avoid Perl (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505386)

it's a web monkey tool.

Obviously not a very good book (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505411)

An "8.7". Not as bad as the totally garbage "8" books, but well below the standard "9".

TIMMY! (-1, Offtopic)

gregarine (171102) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505429)

TIMMY!

I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time... (4, Informative)

truth_revealed (593493) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505433)

Don't worry about about Perl5/XS becoming obsoleted - it will be with us for a long time since the Parrot (perl 6 VM) project seems to be going nowhere fast. Parrot is suffering from kitchen sink/second system syndrome.

Recently, the DotGNU have made an overture [develooper.com] to try to use the Parrot runtime for their C# compiler but found that Parrot needs a lot of work to get to the point where they could use it.

Some Parrot VM problems:

no calling conventions yet for subroutines. There is no hope of offering mixed language support unless they do this.

no conversion opcodes for various builtin types (float, char, short, int)

non-perl languages expected to provide additional support in the form of C code libraries for their opcodes. This would nix any hope of having a single standard universal virtual machine.

no way to call out to C code

no equivalent of Java's jar file or CLR's assemblies for parrot library distribution

way too many registers: their register based VM (32 int registers, 32 double registers, 32 string registers, 32 PMC registers plus various stacks) requires a sophisticated compiler to do proper register allocation and needlessly complicates their VM.

no consideration of threads in their design. How will they handle synchronization, for example?

The points above are not coding issues, but issues of design. It seems that Parrot is too hung up on making the VM efficient and are not seeing the bigger picture - to get the features in place first so that high-level languages can work. Or perhaps they should simply concentrate on getting Perl6 to work first. They need more focus. The project tries to be all things to all people, but ends up satisfiying no one.

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505577)

Nice troll. I like the way you make so many obvisously wrong assertions, but get moderated up by putting them in a nice list. And much more subtle than PhysicsGenius or egg troll.

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (5, Informative)

Elian (10270) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505722)

You missed the mark in just a few places here.
  1. no calling conventions yet for subroutines. Alas not true. They're in place and have been for quite some time.
  2. no conversion opcodes for various builtin types Also incorrect--we've got them and have since the very beginning. What we don't have is low-level support for specific size integer and floats, since our target languages (perl, python, ruby) don't have them. Adding them adds no overhead, though, so they're going in since it'll make base .NET and JVM compatibility simpler.
  3. non-perl languages expected to provide additional support in the form of C code libraries for their opcodes. Once again, incorrect. No external libraries are or will be required. We're turing complete and generally have a richer set of base semantics than .NET or the JVM does. This doesn't mean that someone can't choose to require an alternate set of opcodes if they want, but the engine doesn't require it.
  4. no way to call out to C code This one's actually true. We've not gotten to that part yet, though it's on the list.
  5. no equivalent of Java's jar file or CLR's assemblies for parrot library distribution Incorrect, bytecode files work just fine for this. That part of the design is somewhat incomplete, though.
  6. way too many registers: their register based VM ... requires a sophisticated compiler to do proper register allocation and needlessly complicates their VM Wrong yet again, sorry. Doesn't requore a sophisticated compiler at all. At best it requires some sophisticated register allocation algorithms. Luckily for us, those algorithms are old, known territory, which is why we've got them implemented already. So what if it makes the VM slightly more complex? (And it is only slightly more complex because of it) We're not writing something for CS101 here.
  7. no consideration of threads in their design. Once again, incorrect, if you'd bothered to read any of the design documents. Threading isn't, at the moment, implemented because other things have been more important, but it has been thought about in the design.
1.5 for 7. Not too good there. Oh, and this:
seems that Parrot is too hung up on making the VM efficient
What drugs are you on? If we piss away efficiency in the design, no amount of clever coding will ever get it back. Maybe you're willing to sacrifice a factor of two in speed for "clarity" but so are nine of your friends. (To misquote the author of make) I, on the other hand, am not.

Finally

Or perhaps they should simply concentrate on getting Perl6 to work first. They need more focus. The project tries to be all things to all people, but ends up satisfiying no one.
If you'll look, you'll notice that perl 6 isn't fully designed yet, but the bits that are have been implemented.

Just because you can't (or won't, or don't want to) see the focus doesn't mean it's not there. It is, thanks very much, and we're well on track to do what we need and do it well. The design's flexible enough to pick up things like JVM or .NET compatibility without a loss of focus or efficiency, so there's no reason not to.

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (2, Interesting)

truth_revealed (593493) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505865)

Dude, by simply saying that something is not true does not make it true.
The Parrot calling convention POD was pulled a while back. I don't call saveall/restoreall a true calling convention. Prove me wrong - show me a doc with the new calling convention.
Where's Parrot's 64 bit integer type? If you hope to support Java and C# you will need it.
You *do* need some form of distributable bytecode library format - bytecodes alone do not cut it - all projects cannot be monolithicly compiled in a single bytecode file.
Threading issues *must* be considered from the very start - it affects every aspect of your design - from garbage collection to memory layout. Look at all the trouble Perl 5 had grafting threads to its design - they only "got it right" in Perl 5.8.
You're living in a dream world of denial. The project has to address these basic issues if it is to suceed.
It's history repeating itself all over again. Remember what happened to Topaz: Perl for the 22nd Century [perl.com] ?

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505915)

You mean chip's *SOLO* attempt to try to rewrite Perl5 in c++? What about it?

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (5, Interesting)

Elian (10270) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505988)

Nope, but being right makes it true.

  1. The Parrot calling convention POD was pulled a while back. No, it wasn't. PDD 3 is in, and has been for a long time. There have been minor revisions, but that's it--minor revisions.
  2. Where's Parrot's 64 bit integer type? Inside a PMC, at the recommendation of the dotGNU folks. We'll stick the 128 bit, 256 bit, and 512 bit integers in one too, if we need them.
  3. You *do* need some form of distributable bytecode library format No, we don't, not for perl, python, and ruby support. (Who was it whining about lack of focus earlier?) Bytecode files do work just fine for it anyway, however. Nobody said they needed to be structureless.
  4. Threading issues *must* be considered from the very start Yes, I know. If you'd have bothered to do any research, you'd have seen the direction we're going, and you'd have realized that what we've done so far has no ramifications for our chosen threading model.

The only part of history repeating itself is the naysaying from people who've not done their research. If you're going to criticize, at least get it right.

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (1)

truth_revealed (593493) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506121)

You think PMCs will cure all ills, it seems. I beg to differ. They just defer the hard work to the high-level language implementor. Now the high level language implementor would have to write custom C code to support such things as basic arithmetic - doesn't that defeat the whole purpose of having a generic VM? I don't think many people would be crazy about the idea of linking in shared libraries for Parrot apps to support the PMCs in other languages.

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (5, Informative)

Elian (10270) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506229)

You seem to be missing the point with some regularity. PMCs don't have to be written in C--they will be doable in parrot code if need be. And just because 64 bit integers will be done with PMCs doesn't mean that they won't be part of the core distribution, or a recommended library.

There's nothing particularly wrong with saying "You must have the X library/module/kit to do Y". Requiring the install of the .NET library to get full .NET functionality will undoubtedly be needed. (We're certainly not going to ship the full .NET core library with Parrot any more than we're going to ship the full Java core library) If we don't ship 64 bit ints as part of the core, they'll either be in the .NET library, or in an extended data type library.

What's next, will you start complaining next that we're going to require installing Postgres to access Postgres databases? (Or will the next complaint be about the bloated size of the distribution to provide the features that match your expectations?)

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (1)

truth_revealed (593493) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506458)

Parrot lacks key builtin opcodes for universal language support - like support for 64 bit ints. As for the embedded Postres support within the Parrot VM itself, no, a C calling facility from Parrot would do just fine.
By delaying the decision on how to hook up Parrot to native C APIs you are denying Parrot critical third party support. Like guys who simply want to embed Parrot in their application to control a MP3 player or CAD program or whatever. You need the buy in, you need the additional free testers and proponents. Give them a reason to use Parrot at this stage.
Actually this talk of C#/dotGNU/Parrot integration is a good thing - it will give Parrot some focus to run a real language. Perl6 is not the greatest target at this because it keeps shifting.

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (1, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4506714)

x86 lacks key builtin opcodes for universal language support - like support for 64 bit ints.

PPC G4 lacks key builtin opcodes for universal language support - like support for 64 bit ints.

Java VM lacks key builtin opcodes for universal language support - like support for 64 bit ints.

You do understand that Parrot is a VM, don't you?

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4506770)

Java has a builtin 'long' opcodes that deal with 64 bit types: lstore, lshr, to name a couple.

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (2)

babbage (61057) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506136)

I won't bother with a point by point rebuttal of your trolling, especially since Dan has just countered all of your half-truths much better than I ever could. But one remark in particular stands out & bears a reply:
non-perl languages expected to provide additional support in the form of C code libraries for their opcodes.

If I remember the talks Dan has given to Boston.pm correctly, you've got this almost completely backwards. A more accurate reading is that Parrot is designed to act as kind of a superset of the target languages (Perl, Python, and Ruby) and that, in the handful of cases where an abstracted general feature of Parrot doesn't map perfectly back to the languages, any of those languages -- *including Perl* -- may have to adapt to Parrot's needs. In other words, Parrot has certain features because the Python & Ruby folks needed them, and these will require Perl to adapt if it wants to take advantage. (If we're lucky, Dan may clarify &/or add to this -- it's been a few months now and I forget most of the details of the presentation...).

So let's not have this kind of trolling, please. If you think Parrot is making such fundamental mistakes, help out or fork off your own project to prove yourself. Antagonistically spouting off half-correct technical gibberish on Slashdot isn't helping anyone.

Re:I think Perl5/XS will be with us for long time. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4506861)

Oh Lord! Think of the children!

There is nothing wrong with a good debate.
That's why Slashdot exists.

PERL6 IS A MISTAKE!!!!! (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505437)

I've been using perl pretty much constantly since the Pink Camel, and believe me, Perl 5 is an extremely good language for quick scripting things. That's what it was designed for. Sure, you can do big projects in it, but it's not exactly ideal. Recently I've started using Ruby [ruby-lang.org] as well, and I intend to move my department over to it instead of wasting time with Perl 6.

One of the goals of Perl 6 is to make non-trivial projects possible. That's good. The way it's being done is bad. Perl was once a lightweight, extremely flexible language. Now it's become a huge ugly monster [mozilla.org] . People wanted OO, so a nasty hack was bolted on top to allow some semblance of it. Now this nasty hack is being expanded. Sure, the code's different, but the basic form is the same. Kludge upon kludge upon kludge; I'd much rather have a nice, clean, pure language [rubycentral.com] (and not one with loads of irritating whitespace [python.org] thank you very much).

The same goes for the syntax. All the switching between $, @ and % is really irritating (ask a newbie how to get at the length of the keys array of a hash inside a hash, for example), and the changes proposed for 6 are just making this worse -- it seems that Larry, in his infinite wisdom, wants to prefix every data type with a different hard-to-type character. Perl was only designed for the three data types, and adding more is a mess.

Perl 6 is a complete rewrite, but it keeps all the mess which has accumulated over the previous versions. This is not good. Sure, my const int $var = 27; may look neat (in the same way that, say, Pascal [lysator.liu.se] does), but $var isn't entirely constant, or entirely an integer, it's just a hack which makes it sort of behave like one. The whole thing is an exercise in pseudo-computer science masturbation with little real purpose except to please the managers who dislike the one thing that makes Perl special.

On a similar note is regexes. I'm an avid fan of regular expressions simply because a nondeterministic finite automata is far more flexible than linear code. However, Larry must have been smoking that cheap $2 crack when he wrote this [perl.com] . Does he want Perl 6 to be flex [gnu.org] or something?

I won't be going on to use 6. It's a nice idea, but it's completely unnecessary. It won't make large projects any easier to manage (the language is still, at heart, an almighty hack -- an impressive one, but still a hack). It won't make OO any cleaner. It won't make development any faster. To put it bluntly, Perl scripts will still look less beautiful than our friend Mr Goatse [goatse.info] . I'd prefer to use a language [ruby-lang.org] which has always been pure synthesis of science and engineering, not some half-baked imposter [beonex.com] .

Perl 6 will be nice, but I'm guessing it will be the end of Perl. It can't do what it wants to do whilst still being based upon a nasty mess. There are now other options, which provide all of Perl's power and none of the mess. Sorry, but *BSD^H^H^H^H Perl is dying. Larry is buggering it up the ass [hick.org] without lubricants, just like Shoeboy is doing to Larry's daughter.

Save some money (3, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505487)

bn.com has the book for $35.96 Amazon has it for $31.47 [amazon.com] .




----
Associates Link

Re:Save some money (5, Informative)

marklark (39287) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506078)

also available from the publisher as an e-book for $22.47 (half SRP)

http://www.manning.com/jenness/index.html

Sigmund Freud... (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505498)

Analyze this!

Perl is beyond dead. (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4505542)

Perl is beyond dead. Get a life. Troll? Yes. True? Yes.

pcre (4, Informative)

larry bagina (561269) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505606)

Why would you want to embed perl into a C application? Probably to access perl's powerful regular expressions. If that's the case, the Perl Compatible Regular Expressions [pcre.org] library is a more ideal solution. PHP, Python, and Ruby all use it to support perl regexes.

Interfacing Perl with C... (5, Informative)

Snake (13761) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505640)

Interfacing Perl with C has its uses, depending on what your current project is.

In my case, I'm part of a large scale C++ project. I have the ownership of a module with clearly defined interfaces with the other modules written in this project.

Since my module relies heavily on XML and strings, I have always wanted to pair it with the power of Perl for testing purpose.

Among various possibles solutions (XS, SWIG, etc.), I settled on SWIG because it could handle 'shallow' classes. (allowing to expose my module as a perl object)

This has been the best decision I have made over the last year: when I get a bug case, I simply write a perl script to try to reproduce the problem, add some loops to get some combinatory, then check the result. This drastically cuts down on the time spent on debugging my module (or the modules used by it, for that matter :)

Pros:

  • SWIG: Relatively easy generation of stub code (by using interface files)
  • SWIG: It is possible to use the same interface files to generate stub code for Java, Python (though, I didn't test this feature)
  • SWIG: Excellent doc.
  • Perl: you can leverage the CPAN/PPM modules to do some truly magical hackings
Cons:
  • While SWIG does a good job of hiding the gory parts of Perl Internals, you still need to brush up on it to better understand how it works, if only to avoid memory leaks
  • Perl: I haven't been to handle properly the passing of strings (I managed to do it by using a horrible hack that seems to work). I'm probably not smart enough to understand the documentation or the samples.
  • SWIG: the stub code is dependant on the version of perl used. It is therefore difficult to release it. This is mostly a dev tool.

Summary: If you are a C/C++ developper and your code can use XML/text files/strings, consider using SWIG or XS for testing purpose.

PS: if you want to Quantify/Purify your module/Perl script, using ActiveState Perl, you need to recompile Perl with the -DPURIFY option toggled on.

I'm just waiting for someone... (1)

SensitiveMale (155605) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505856)

to call their Perl extension 'grain of sand'.

The trouble with mixed-language work (3, Informative)

Animats (122034) | more than 11 years ago | (#4505919)

If you interface a language with automatic memory management with one with manual memory management, like Java or Perl with C or C++, the low-level stuff has to be very, very carefully written to prevent breaking the memory management system. Most application programmers aren't good enough to write the bulletproof code needed to do that right.

The result, of course, is undebuggable random crashes in the high-level part of the system. Here's are some typical bug reports from mixed Perl/C work:

  • #1 [www.ecos.de] Okay, it seems to be some kind of conflict between mod_perl/Embperl and PHP and perhaps Apache::DBI. My Embperl stuff works if there's no database access. It also works if I don't load libphp4.so. I guess the best solution is to either build everything statically or run seperate servers for PHP and mod_perl.
  • #2: [openldap.org] Following a large number of updates to our database, slapd is prone to crashing when reading values back. We load a database of about 3800 users with slapadd, then modify a single attribute of every 'person'. Then slapd is likely to crash on reading values back. Restarting slapd seems to make it work again. Just prior to the crash, slapd will give incorrect query results. ... We have a large client site limping along due to this kind of problem ... so any help would be welcome.
After this, you begin to understand the logic behind Microsoft's C# mixed-language run-time environment. That's ugly, too, but more maintainable, because the toolset has some support for mixed-language work.

I'd like to see safe inter-language calls across a protection boundary. CORBA is about as good as it gets, but it's slow, because it marshalls the data into a stream and pumps it through a socket to the other side. There are faster approaches (look at Multics protection rings) but they need some hardware support, which we don't have today.

Tcl and other languages (2, Informative)

DavidNWelton (142216) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506045)

Tcl certainly isn't as cool as Perl, but the implementation is very, very beautifully written C, and combining C and Tcl is a pleasure. It's fun, simple and easy. You also have access to a lot of neat internal features.


Perl, IMO, is the worst of the scripting languages to combine with C... the interface is not pretty. Other languages like Python aren't bad. Lua is good if you want something really small and fast.

Re:Tcl and other languages (1)

DavidNWelton (142216) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506131)

And by "cool", I mean cool as in "acceptable to the slashdot crowd". I use Tcl and C professionally, cool or not:-)

Why do we need comparisons? (3, Interesting)

DEBEDb (456706) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506056)

People who know C probably will not have
problems learning Perl, but I always thought
it's more fun to learn new way of thinking
that comes with a new language. Thinking
of a new language in terms of the one you
know may result in taking the old-language
style of programming to the new one - so
what's the point of learning?

You can probably explain LISP in terms of Basic
concepts, but that's a waste... :)

Next: Extending and Embracing Perl (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4506151)

That's right! Perl .NET Edition Service Pack 2 Revision 3 Professional Version! (OEM)

Enjoy using Perl? (-1, Redundant)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4506152)

I don't.

Why XS?? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 11 years ago | (#4506530)

So, basic Perl+C newbie question, why XS?? Why NOT Inline::C or SWIG??

I'm contemplating integrating something using one of these methods, and frankly Inline *looks* the easiest (to understand and to use quickly - important for me).

What are the trade-offs between the various methods??

I did a brief Google search, but only came up with an Inline::C article ("pathalogically polluting perl") that basically mentioned Inline generally was easier to use.

Thoughts??

Right stuff (2)

Observer (91365) | more than 11 years ago | (#4506857)

<blurb>
Ever marvel at how Perl can "do the right thing" but still be written in C?</blurb>
No. I do marvel occasionally at how the Perl5 interpreter has been so constructed that it can handle pedantic, careful, robust, production-quality mannerisms without barfing on quick'n'dirty one-time script shortcuts. But mostly, these days I just take it for granted, and give thanks that a student of human language has built such a flexible language-to-instruct-machines. The underlying langauge of implementation is usually irrelevant, unless there's a need to connect to something that has neglected to provide a Perl API, in which case we can usually find a way via the de-facto machine-independent assembler, "C".

But for code that calculates my taxes or bank balance, or drives the displays at the operating theatre if I'm brought in for emergency heart surgery, I want implementation languages where there is no question of ambiguity in the interpretation of the semantics of the code.

--
Perl, C, C++ (urgh) hacker. Don't tell anyone I can read COBOL.

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