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Superhero Smackdown

CmdrTaco posted about 12 years ago | from the deadpool-will-defeat-all-of-them dept.

Movies 602

Paul writes "Fox News is running a story that asks one of the best geek questions of our generation: who win if Superman and Batman fought one another?. The last this topic was big was during the Spider-Man/AOTC rush in May. I distinctly remember a particular essay that compared Superman, Batman, Spider-Man, any Jedi (particularly Yoda), and James Bond." Obviously the author didn't read DK2 ;) And I put my money on Deadpool, if only because his quips are better.

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First... (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555426)

Awe forget it. This story doesn't even deserve a FP. :(

Dumb question... (-1, Troll)

mjphil (113320) | about 12 years ago | (#4555427)

Superman wins. He's SUPER!

Re:Dumb question... (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555446)


Re:Dumb question... (1)

tetra103 (611412) | about 12 years ago | (#4555517)

...but wait...what if there wasn't an empty phone booth availible? Honestly, the best geek discussion I had like this was a showdown between the DeathStar vs the Borg. Of course, the DeathStar would win hands down :)

fp! (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555431)

1 r000l!!!~~!

Wasn't this settled? (0, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555435)

Superman would win. That's why Bruce Wayne keeps some kryptonite to stop him if he goes nuts.

Russian Hostage Jokes (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555437)

Q. Why do they have 5 or more exits in a Russian theater?
A. Because people are just dying to get out!

Q. Why don't people like to sit by Russian soldiers in the movie theaters?
A. They have bad gas

Q. Why did the Russian theater patrons have to buy bigger clothes?
A. Because they were carried out of the theater on a stretcher

Q. Why did the Russian cinema fan fall out of his seat?
A. Because he was dead

Superheroes Quiz ! (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555439)
Ta ke the Superhero Quiz !

what are you, 12? (2, Funny)

Thud457 (234763) | about 12 years ago | (#4555557)

I don't know, but I do know that a average run of the mill star destroyer will kick the Enterprise's ass!

Next up : "Who's better Santa Clause or Jesus ?"

No Contest (1, Interesting)

LighthouseJ (453757) | about 12 years ago | (#4555440)

Superman. Superman is The Man of Steel and can do anything he wants. Batman is just a guy in a costume, no special powers, just gadgets with names that start with Bat-. Batman also had his sidekick, Robin to help the illusion that Batman was a real superhero.

Re:No Contest (5, Insightful)

stratjakt (596332) | about 12 years ago | (#4555515)

Yeah, but Batman'd be bright enough (and rich enough) to stock a good supply of kryptonite.

Plus, Superman draws his powers from the yellow rays of the sun - and is useless at night. At least thats how it used to be in the comic. He also originally couldn't fly - just jump really high (tall buildings in a single bound).

Superman's a clod. He just brute forces everything, he has no technique or skill or intelligence.

Just watch Justice League. Batman, Martian Manhunter, Green Lantern and the Flash will be ducking and dodging attacks left and right, then coming up with some innovative method to take out the enemy.

Superman and Wonder Woman just take it head on and get plowed through a concrete wall, then get up and get smashed again, until they finally prevail.

Re:No Contest (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555518)

Superman is The Man of Steel and can do anything he wants.

Oh please!!! Superman can't even feed himself or wipe his own ass. He's not winning shit.

Why do we care? (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555447)

You are such a loser.

And you know you are!

Dumbest question ever (2, Insightful)

Junior J. Junior III (192702) | about 12 years ago | (#4555451)

Obviously, unless Batman has some kryptonite stashed in his utility belt, he's thoroughly F'd if he messes with the Man of Steel.

Have the /. editors ever read any comic books? Batman is a normal guy. He just has a fancy suit and a lot of gadgets and training. It's no contest.


Re:Dumbest question ever (4, Funny)

joshsisk (161347) | about 12 years ago | (#4555489)

(slight spoilers ahead)

Have the /. editors ever read any comic books?

Did you ever read Dark Knight Returns? Of _course_ he has kryptonite in his utility belt!!

Re:Dumbest question ever (1)

binner1 (516856) | about 12 years ago | (#4555495)

I've got a comic that says otherwise. I forget what the series was called, but it was 4 Batman comics in one specially bound comic. They were set when Bruce Wayne was of retirement age.

Anyway, he nuked Superman, and then kicked the crap out of him while he was in a weakened condition. He didn't kill him, but he won the fight.

Just a FYI. If I remember what the series was called, I'll post it here too.


Re:Dumbest question ever (2)

foistboinder (99286) | about 12 years ago | (#4555500)

Have the /. editors ever read any comic books? Batman is a normal guy. He just has a fancy suit and a lot of gadgets and training. It's no contest.

I always thought that was his appeal. He's just a normal human (at least physically) without the benefit of being an alien or mutated. At his core, he's really just a very rich vigilante.

Re:Dumbest question ever (5, Informative)

Metaldsa (162825) | about 12 years ago | (#4555508)

Have you ever read comic books? The only known kyrptonite was given to batman from superman to stop him in case he goes crazy. I agree with what others are saying. If Batman attacks then he wins but if superman attacks first he wins (b/c batman doesn't carry around the kryptonite 24/7).

Re:Dumbest question ever (1)

stratjakt (596332) | about 12 years ago | (#4555558)

> Batman is a normal guy.

So is Lex Luthor, and he manages to get the best of Superman on a regular basis.

League of Gentlemen? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555454)

Who would win, right, out of Predator und Alien?...

Sad, truly sad.

Or perhaps... (1)

OrangeSpyderMan (589635) | about 12 years ago | (#4555455)

Obviously the author didn't read DK2 ;)

...he did. I gave up my special world where journalists with integrity resisted blagging other people's ideas when they were pushed for a story within a deadline.

Doesn't anyone know Frank Miller? (5, Informative)

mikedaisey (413058) | about 12 years ago | (#4555457)

Batman wins through guile, then spares Superman's life. Film at eleven.

The Dark Night Returns - Right? (1)

FunkDaddy (556594) | about 12 years ago | (#4555571)

An amazing comic about Batman coming out of retirement...

Real vs. imaginary superheroes (5, Funny)

Drunken Coward (574991) | about 12 years ago | (#4555459)

This desire to see bloodshed between our heroes is obviously human nature, take the popularity of MTV's Celebrity Deathmatch.

So why haven't we seen more things like exhibitional wrestling matches between Paul Allen, Steve Ballmer, and Bill Gates?

Or ESR and RMS?

Re:Real vs. imaginary superheroes (1)

monadicIO (602882) | about 12 years ago | (#4555534)

Or ESR and RMS?

Or mix the real and imaginary to have a match between cowboyneal and robin?

Super Smash Bros. Melee (3, Informative)

yerricde (125198) | about 12 years ago | (#4555610)

This desire to see bloodshed between our heroes is obviously human nature, take the popularity of MTV's Celebrity Deathmatch.

Or of Nintendo's Super Smash Bros. Melee.

I'm just waiting for Super Smash Bros. 3: Nintendo vs Sega, or Nintendo vs Capcom, or (better yet) Nintendo vs Disney. Mario could tear apart Mickey Mouse, but I'm not all too sure Kinopio could beat Pinocchio.

Re:Super Smash Bros. Melee (5, Funny)

Rude Turnip (49495) | about 12 years ago | (#4555628)

Hey, if Eldred wins, we could at least get Mario vs. Steamboat Willie!

Ahem. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555460)

1) This is a repeat story
2) Batman is a human with skills, Superman is called "superhuman" for a reason; Batman couldn't beat him in any possible way, except by lobbing a few tons of Kryptonite his way.

depends (5, Insightful)

Unknown Poltroon (31628) | about 12 years ago | (#4555461)

Spur of the moment drunken brawl: Superman, no question.
Planned event: Batman, hands down.
(unless theyre limited to their bare hands)

Always bet on the sneaky pragmatic bastard.

That's easy (4, Insightful)

SuperDuG (134989) | about 12 years ago | (#4555462)

Superman has un-human like powers. Batman is an anti-social billionaire who just likes to hang out in the dark all the time. Unless good ol bruce has a monopoly on the local gotham Cryptonite plant, I think hands down the "man of steel" himself will wax batman no problem.

One question does come to mind, since they both always "fought evil", which one is going to turn to make this possible.

Even more fun would be Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles vs. Power Rangers, or Pokemon vs. Dragon Ball Z. Why does everything have to be a boxing match, I want to see an all out brawl!

Re:That's easy (1)

irma trattino (607191) | about 12 years ago | (#4555507)

They had a lot of problems to put Batman in Justice League of America, because he doesn't have any super powers, and is a bit useless. So Batman would definitively NOT win.

Re:That's easy (5, Interesting)

GMontag (42283) | about 12 years ago | (#4555642)

Actually, Batman was GIVEN Cryptonite by Superman, just in case Superman went nuts and had to be subdued.

Thus, Batman would win hands down.

I'd win! (-1)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555463)

I'm the baddest comic book heroine on the net!

Diana Prince, super man hating fan of cgi

Re:I'd win! (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555492)

Bullchyt. I'd win!

I'm Osiris the dickless nygga
oh and take your b.cgi
and shove it!

Re:I'd win! (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555597)

So which one of you nyggaz posting that b.cgi
link was the one who stole my dayum cd's?

the crosseyed dude aka: The Shepherd :

Superman (5, Funny)

CaffeineAddict2001 (518485) | about 12 years ago | (#4555467)

Of course. Batman is just a talented schizophrenic drunk millionaire with an adopted boy good at solving riddles. Hell, Superman wouldn't even need to do anything, Batman would probably off himself.

The best one (5, Funny)

andyring (100627) | about 12 years ago | (#4555468)

Ahhhh! How could you people forget one of the best - Inspector Gadget!

Superman... (5, Funny)

spakka (606417) | about 12 years ago | (#4555471)

given sufficient stem-cell research

Re:Superman... (1)

swaic (541592) | about 12 years ago | (#4555547)

Hahahaha!!! Nice!

Duh... (3, Interesting)

xTK-421x (531992) | about 12 years ago | (#4555473)

Superman by a mile... Batman is a highly skilled human, while Superman is a endowed with superhuman strength, speed, intelligence, etc...

Now, Superman vs the Flash, who would win that race?

Re:Duh... (0)

arock99 (612650) | about 12 years ago | (#4555501)

Superman...he's been able to travel in time on his own before...he'd simply travel to before the race started and wait for Flash to actually get there :)

Re:Duh... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555549)

It happened in the early 90's. Flash won, just barely. which kinda sucks for him, as speed is his main thing, and superman has like 12 other powers.

Re:Duh... (1)

matlokheed (602233) | about 12 years ago | (#4555576)

The Flash won in the race they had years back and since then he's become some sort of speed entity (I know I read this somewhere), so Flash would win by a lot now.

Re:Duh... (0)

stratjakt (596332) | about 12 years ago | (#4555594)

> Superman is a endowed with superhuman strength, speed, intelligence

Naw, no intelligence. He punches himself out of every jam he gets into. He's a white Mike Tyson in a cape.

And I think Freud would be interested that you chose to use the word 'endowed' when discussing Superman.

No contest... (0, Offtopic)

GnomeKing (564248) | about 12 years ago | (#4555474)

The obvious answer is the MPAA ...

It's already been settled... (5, Interesting)

stubear (130454) | about 12 years ago | (#4555477)


Batman kicked Supermnan's ass with the help of a biomech suit and some kryptonite. Doesn't matter how he did it, the result was still the same.

Re:It's already been settled... (4, Informative)

jgerman (106518) | about 12 years ago | (#4555516)

Don't forget that Superman was a weak assed tool of the government at that point. Batman deserved to win, he was still a bad ass.

Re:It's already been settled... (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555524)

Thanks for the spoiler warning jerkass!

Re:It's already been settled... (5, Informative)

mblase (200735) | about 12 years ago | (#4555561)

Actually, if I remember that story correctly, Batman ended up dead at the end of the fight. Granted, it was a self-administered, drug-induced temporary cardiac arrest to give the illusion of death, but it certainly implies that Batman didn't expect to actually win in a fight to the death. And if Superman hadn't been feeling charitable, he wouldn't have let Batman get away after his funeral, when Supes was the only one who could hear his heart start beating again.

Of course, this sort of thing is always subjective to the moods of the storywriter. Which is why you never, ever want to bring up this topic on the rec.arts.comics [] newsgroups.

Re:It's already been settled... (3, Informative)

mikedaisey (413058) | about 12 years ago | (#4555591)

Well, he had his hand at Supes throat and could have killed him, but didn' whatever happens after that point is moot.

Re:It's already been settled... (5, Informative)

Plutor (2994) | about 12 years ago | (#4555641)

A friend [] and I had a discussion about this a whiles back, and I raised the following important points:

1) Batman also had the help of others: a new Robin in the original DKR, and The Flash, Green Arrow, and Plastic Man in DKR2.
2) Superman was working for evil villains oppressing the world's populace. His heart clearly wasn't in the fight.
3) Most importantly, both of these stories take place in an alternate universe, set in years after the end of the traditional "Silver Age" DC universe was closed. It is hard to extrapolate these results to the present-day Modern Age Superheroes.

Another thing to point out, in the current universe, Superman once gave Batman a kryptonite ring, with instructions to use it if he were ever to become evil (a-la Red Kryptonite Superman in the third movie [] ). If there was such a battle, it would likely be because one of the two "switched sides". If so, Batman would likely use the ring to his advantage.

Rollins VS Danzig (5, Funny)

puto (533470) | about 12 years ago | (#4555483)

I want real world cage matches.

I want to see Henry Rollins and Danzig get it on.

Rollins would be intellectualizing his moves blow by blow. He would enter the ring babbling in low tones about the state of human relationships and work himself up into a screaming rage while inflating his neck like some iguana on steroids.

Danzig would be continually wiping the runny makeup out of his eyes as he started to sweat. Singing about how his mother could bang better heads than Hank.

That would be entertainment.


Re:Rollins VS Danzig (1)

cshuttle (613776) | about 12 years ago | (#4555604)

Rock on! I'm happy someone else has thought of this one!

My cousin and I were talking about a mortal kombat with heavy metal leads years ago, like James Hetfield of Metallica vs. Vinnie Paul of Pantera.

Re:Rollins VS Danzig (5, Interesting)

Neologic (48268) | about 12 years ago | (#4555633)

Actually a few years ago, I got the chance to ask Henry Rollins this question. He laughed and said that Danzig was a good friend of his. He also added that Danzig did a lot of martial arts and would beat the crap out of him.

Where is Jon Katz when we need him? (5, Funny)

tps12 (105590) | about 12 years ago | (#4555484)

Jon Katz owned [] the Spider-Man vs. AOTC debate. I'd bet his take on this one would make a good read. Anyone know what became of him?

Haiku (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555485)

Geeks really need to
Get a life and stop sucking off
Superhero toys

Okay, that's it. I'm leaving Slashdot. (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555488)

The stories keep getting MORE AND MORE GAY

This Is Not News: This Is: #@ +1, Patriotic (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555493)

Why don't you report the many anti-war protests in the U.S. [] and the idiocy of the Grifter-In-Chief []

Thank you and have a nice day.

You're both wrong ... (3, Funny)

carb (611951) | about 12 years ago | (#4555494)

Winner: Spongebob Squarepants

Neither (1)

mogorman (618512) | about 12 years ago | (#4555502)

Both comics produce far to much money, esp. with debates like these to generate more revenue etc etc... however spiderman is probably #1 has almost no reason to fight, batman has cash, superman is invincible, spiderman is pretty much every day joe

Hahahaha (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555504)

Checkout ERIC RAYMOND's homepage...


1999: "I'm a MILLIONAIRE. I'm gonna buy a new cellphone!"

2002: "Hmm. This PayPal tipjar button might help out."

haha hahah haha


F e l t c h m a l e

Anal Cox

Gay linux conspiracy?

Batman... (3, Interesting)

SealBeater (143912) | about 12 years ago | (#4555505)

Batman would win, without a doubt. Not only is he sneaky as hell, he prepares for everything. As soon as he heard about Superman, he probably started planning on what to do with him, just in case. And he's got the money to back it up. Superman is cool and all, but he's a farmboy hick at heart. He would just charge straight in, get caught by something that would slow him down and get his jaw broken with Batman's krytonite brass knuckles.


Haiku (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555509)

Geeks really need to
Get life and stop sucking off
Superhero toys

the tick (1, Insightful)

overlord (5277) | about 12 years ago | (#4555510)

The tick of course, becuase he even know it is a fight.


Re:the tick (1)

arthurs_sidekick (41708) | about 12 years ago | (#4555543)

I dunno, Clark Oppenheim was prepared to whip the Tick's ass, and had Jimmy not shown up after the Tick smashed Clark's hypno-glasses, it probably would have been over for our favourite hunka Blue Justice. Unless the Tick had another eraser somewhere in those hidden pockets.

Overblown title (1)

arthurs_sidekick (41708) | about 12 years ago | (#4555512)

The referenced story bugs me a bit because looking at the title of "Superman vs. Batman" doesn't immediately lead me to think of a knock-down, drag-out fight. If the movie gets made, it will have the two characters at odds with one another, and maybe a blow or two, or Superman taking down the Batwing (or whatever that machine's called) forcibly. But that's about it. The other titles definitely suggest greater camp / gore potential anyway.

Hell-oh (0, Troll)

billcopc (196330) | about 12 years ago | (#4555513)

Batman shoves a chunk of Kryptonite up Superman's rectum then runs back to the lair, only to find that Lois Lane's all dressed up in vinyl and ready to party, drunk as fuck. He then calls up Robin and tells him they should start seeing other people. Robin starts shooting heroin and eventually dies of AIDS and/or Hepatitis while Batman discovers the joys and pains of sharing the rest of his life with one logically-challenged bimbo.

Meanwhile, Superman's still trying to find a proctologist without a sense of humor, because everyone just laughs, points and takes pictures of his green glowing butt.

(Ok girls, it's 10 a.m. and I haven't slept since sunday.. nighty night)

Grudge Match (5, Informative)

hero (25043) | about 12 years ago | (#4555521)

If you haven't seen this [] site yet, you should check it out. It features hilarious commentary about many classic grudge matches like rocky vs rambo, homer vs norm, gary coleman vs webster and latka vs balki, well okay, some of them are a bit non-standard.

The best part is you can vote on the current grudge match and decide the winner and then check the history for the winners of all the previous matches.

(warning, you will waste the whole work day reading the site)


My favorite vs. flick (3, Funny)

pizza_milkshake (580452) | about 12 years ago | (#4555527)

Best "versus" movie: Bruce Campbell vs. Army of Darkness


Re:My favorite vs. flick (2, Funny)

The Evil Couch (621105) | about 12 years ago | (#4555579)

hail to the king, baby.

Re:My favorite vs. flick (3, Funny)

glwtta (532858) | about 12 years ago | (#4555611)

heh, I just saw Bruce Campbell at a book signing yesterday... cool guy.

I even thought, "Hope Bruce Campbell comes up on /. tomorrow so I can mention this..."

Like Hollywood doesn't have enough problems (5, Interesting)

The Evil Couch (621105) | about 12 years ago | (#4555530)

in trying to keep from bastardizing comics. they want to usher in a new era of bite sized cameos and team-ups? man, it's like a shitty aniversary issue or something. As far as batman v superman goes, I distinctly remember batman taking a swing at superman after robin got killed off. he just about broke his hand. come on, it's a no-contest, although as rich as he is, batman could probably reduce superman to living in a cardboard box under a bridge. I'm glad they were smart enough to can that idea.

predator versus aliens, however is an idea that people are actually looking forward to. I think ever since predator 2, where there was an alien skull on display, people have been dying to watch the two races go at it.

and I just don't know about the freddy v. jason thing. I know it's been being kicked around for 10 years or so, unless someone hatches a good plot for it, there's going to be no point in it. it'd just be a race to see who can find people having sex first and then wax them.

They've fought already (1)

Anonymous Codger (96717) | about 12 years ago | (#4555535)

In the Dark Knight series by Frank Miller, Batman and Superman do have at it. Unfortunately, as it's been years since I read it, I don't remember details. I think Supes "kills" batty, but it turns out Batman has taken some drug to make him seem dead so he can come back in secret and continue the fight against evil in the background.

This series is well worth reading (the first three volumes, at least - I think there have been further followons). In it, superheros have been outlawed. Batman has retired (but illegally comes out of retirement), and Superman is undercover as a US govt. agent - a complete sellout.

Some of the series is pretty contrived, but the first volume in particular is the finest graphic novel I've seen. Gripping and engaging, it really pulls you into Batman's life and the pain that drives him.

Super strength breaks bones (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555537)

One thing that really bugs me is how superman and buffy never cripple their opponents. The truth is that superman would hit batman, batman would go flying, and as a result of the fist impact as well as the landing, batman would break numerous bones. Hell, superman would probably puncture his lung in one hit. The end.

Oh come on, if you're going to go for hero battles (2)

InnereNacht (529021) | about 12 years ago | (#4555541)

..Groo vs Aeon Flux.

The King.... (3, Informative)

mccalli (323026) | about 12 years ago | (#4555548)

No, not Elvis.

Far back in the mists of time, or sixteen years ago if you're being less poetic, I was a DM'ing my first set of D&D games. I created the Eruvia continent for the setting, and populated it with various goodies, nasties and a chief baddy - The King.

The King was a stunningly powerful lych, and it soon became clear that if this guy drifted in to the game, the balance of power was ended. Put simply - the King was too strong, and ruined all the games because players went up against him and just instanteneously died.

I'm not deeply into comics, but Superman seems to be that character to me. In Superman they've created a superhero who is just too strong to be beaten.

I fixed my game world by arranging for the King to die courtesy of some unspecified magic tool. The games became interesting again. Similarly, I was encouraged a while ago that Superman was to be killed off, but apparently they've wimped out of that and brought him back to life.

I suppose then my pick would be Superman. But it's not a pick I make with any great enthusiasm. It's an unbalanced character.


Re:The King.... (2)

mikedaisey (413058) | about 12 years ago | (#4555616)

There is only one word, and the word is Kryptonite.

Re:The King.... (1)

mccalli (323026) | about 12 years ago | (#4555639)

There is only one word, and the word is Kryptonite.

Or "some unspecified magic tool", as my parent post noted I'd fixed the King with...

Yes, but it discusses a 'smackdown', which I take to mean a straight fight. Plus Kryptonite has become a really uninteresting plot line, done to death a thousand times...

I take your point though.


But what about Alien(s) vs. Predator (1)

Nos. (179609) | about 12 years ago | (#4555554)

Predator obviously has the weapons, but I think this would an intersting battle anyways. Predator seems to have the advantage in the games, however, Predator's cloaking is useless against Alien, so it becomes interesting. Take away Predator's weapons, and Alien has the battle no problem. However, between the disc and spear, Alien is in for a tough fight.

Of course the best fighter would obviously be an Alien spawned from a Predator! Hmmm, wonder if I can copyright this idea...

Re:But what about Alien(s) vs. Predator (2)

SealBeater (143912) | about 12 years ago | (#4555614)

Of course the best fighter would obviously be an Alien spawned from a Predator! Hmmm, wonder if I can copyright this idea...

That already happened in one of Dark Horse's Predator Vs. Aliens comics. The Alien was pretty bad ass. Interestingly enough, it seemed that the Predators view this as a particularly vile abomination. Spoiler: It took both a tough human marine (last of the human team) and a Predator (last of his hunting party) to take down the Alien. Interesting the theory that two warlike races can work together against a common threat.

P.S. That's a movie I would give a lot to have input and/or see.


I'd bet on Q... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555556)

Q, being in general control of reality, seems a fairly safe bet in silly contests.

Anyway, was it such a slow day that the /. editors wanted to drag this old debate up? What's next: Enterprise vs. Star Destroyer?

A battle with cosmic consequences (1)

inerte (452992) | about 12 years ago | (#4555566)

Vi vs. Emacs

Brain Vs. Brawn (1)

FuzzyDaddy (584528) | about 12 years ago | (#4555567)

If you think about Superman's enemies, there are several "evil genius" types - Lex Luthor, for example.

So what's the lesson - brawn beats brains? It certaintly was true on the playground as a kid, but hardly inspiring. I would want Batman to win (as in DK2), just because he's so much more of an engineer.

AvP (3, Interesting)

Lightwarrior (73124) | about 12 years ago | (#4555570)

That's a very well written article that links to a number of great AvP resources out there. Of course, it fails to go where this subject has already been delved:

Comic Books.

Aliens versus Predator was originally (IIRC) a short in Dark Horse Presents, that was spun off into its own comic. The first series was great - it was about a group of humans who colonized a Predator 'Hunt' planet unbeknownst to the Predators, so when the Predators seeded the planet with Alien eggs they got more than they bargained for (of course, it's more complex than that). There have been a number of other comics (and books) in the same vein, all of them with their good points and bad points.

But one can't speak of comic crossovers without speaking of Batman v. Predator, Aliens v. Predator v. Terminator, Superman v. Aliens - not to mention the various Marvel and DC comics that are about pitting one superhero against another (X-Men and Batman are just versus of the week). The list is virtually endless. It's a lot cheaper to make a comic than a movie, but I think most of these ideas have real merit.

I really, really hope AvP is made into a movie - it's already had two great and successful video games. Of course, we'd have to wait until it came out on DVD to see it ;)


Everybody else... (4, Funny)

keller (267973) | about 12 years ago | (#4555573)

is listing their favourite competitors of a (super)hero vs (super)hero, so i'll do it too!

MacGyver vs Walker Texas Ranger!

That would be one hell of a fight! GoooOOOO MacGyveeeeer!

Batman vs. Superman: By A Religious Fundamentalist (1)

carb (611951) | about 12 years ago | (#4555574)

Batman, living in the U.S. and being white, was no doubt raised Christian. As such, he has the power of God on his side, and who can defeat such power? Let us look back to Moses - a weak being defeating a seemingly more powerful Pharoah. Is this not the same analogy between Batman and Superman? This, of course, is assuming Superman has not yet converted to the faith - in which case Superman would most obviously win, I mean, holy $#!@ he's strong.

Re:Batman vs. Superman: By A Religious Fundamental (1, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | about 12 years ago | (#4555623)

Batman...being white, was no doubt raised Christian....Let us look back to Moses

Yes, lets. Let's notice that Moses would have been a non-white middle-eastern Jew, for example. Perhaps it's not quite the same analogy...?

Supes threw the fight already (plus, the stats) (4, Insightful)

FurryFeet (562847) | about 12 years ago | (#4555581)

Here are the stats [] .
Now, we all know Batman would win. He's got a big ol' kryptonite medallion, that Superman gave him himself, to use in case he was ever controlled by sume supervillain. Along with a speech about how Batman was the only person he would trust with it. I read that comic, but can't find the reference for the life of me :(

History, of a sort (1)

stonecypher (118140) | about 12 years ago | (#4555587)

I feel it important to point out that I own seven comics from various eras in DC, mostly early-mid 70s, which have all hashed this out.

In every single case, Batman wins. The only comic I own where Clark Kent beats Bruce Wayne is where Bruce Wayne is under the mind control of Brainiac, and where Clark uses a lesson learned from Bruce earlier in the comic to undo the problems.

DC has always put Bruce's brains over Clark's powers, though always with significant difficulty.

Christ, Taco! (0, Offtopic)

FreeLinux (555387) | about 12 years ago | (#4555592)

This is the lamest story I think I've ever seen on Slashdot. Hasn't Mrs. Taco started steering you into the real world yet? For Christ's sake, you're a thirty odd year old "man". Isn't it time to let go of the childish fantasies?

Supes vs Spidey (1)

Anonymous Codger (96717) | about 12 years ago | (#4555595)

Marvel and DC collaborated on a large-format comic back in the 70's that pitted Superman and Spider-man against each other. Before they realize they are on the same side, they fight to a draw. How is this possible, you ask? FM, of course. Before the battle, Spider-man is exposed to something (don't remember what, maybe red kryptonite?) that makes him as strong and invulnerable as Superman.

During the same time period, DC also published a Superman vs Muhammed Ali comic. Ali won because they were fighting under a red sun (which saps Superman's powers). But of course they team up at the end to fight the bad guys.

For board gamers (1)

wcbarksdale (621327) | about 12 years ago | (#4555596)

If you want to find out for yourself, try Heroclix [] .

Batman vs. Superman (3, Funny)

Clay Mitchell (43630) | about 12 years ago | (#4555605)

It's generally considered fact that if Batman had enough time to plan, he could defeat God.

Superman would be trivial. Clark/Superman = strong as an ox, dumb as a stump.

No no no... (2, Funny)

haukex (229058) | about 12 years ago | (#4555606)

MacGyver always wins! ...provided he can whip up some kryptonite from what happens to be lying around...

Deadpool is now Agent-X (0)

danbeck (5706) | about 12 years ago | (#4555615)

Just an FYI here, Deadpool is no more. He was "killed" off, and the book was cancelled.

To be honest, good riddence, I say. The writing has been horrible every since Joe Kelly left the scene some 20+ issues ago. Deadpool just hasn't been Deadpool with out Kelly at the helm.

Deadpool has now been reborn as Agent-X with a new creative team and they've actually been doing a pretty good job since they started working with the title. The style feels like the old Deadpool even if the character doesn't look the same and it's fun to read.

News for dweebs... (0, Offtopic)

Black Parrot (19622) | about 12 years ago | (#4555617)

How many angels can dance on the head of a pin? Do you get the same answer if you assume they're doing the Samba instead of the Funky Chicken?

In our next episode we'll discuss whether balrogs have wings, and if so, whether their wingpits smell as bad as their armpits.

This isn't even original! (3, Informative)

i_want_you_to_throw_ (559379) | about 12 years ago | (#4555618)

"Batman vs. Superman" is set to be a movie in '04. It's right here folks! []

It's being directed by Wolfgang Petersen.

It's being made by Warner Brothers so it's a mystery why Fox is asking the question and not Warner Brothers. Maybe Fox is asking FOR Warner Brothers and the top moderated scenarios that you folks are giving will be used.

Taco, you in on this?

why not ask a real "who would win..." question (0, Offtopic)

Savatte (111615) | about 12 years ago | (#4555629)

These hypothetical questions are pretty strange. They aren't real, people! Try this one on for size. Who would win if anti-lock brakes fought redhat 8.0? What if weapons were allowed?

First Rule of Comics (5, Funny)

matlokheed (602233) | about 12 years ago | (#4555634)

When someone is fighting in their own comic against someone of equal power, they're destined to win. If it goes into another book, the fight will usually have an indefinite finish, though will lean towards the characters from the second book (to heighten drama for the character from the first book as the second book's characters will usually be winning at the end of the first book.).

So in other words, if the fight is in a Batman comic, Batman is going to win. If it's in one of Superman's, Superman is going to win. If it's in a combination, there can never be an absolute winner.

I hope that helps.

Space Ghost vs. Harvey Birdman Atty at Law! (1)

stratjakt (596332) | about 12 years ago | (#4555637)

Thats a battle I wanna see. Super/Bat/Aqua-men are done, fork 'em.

And a 3 man tag battle pitting:

Brak/Zorak/Moltar vs the Aqua Teen Hunger Force
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