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'Smart' Clothing: A Fashion Show

Hemos posted more than 10 years ago | from the building-it-right-into-you dept.

Technology 130

Roland Piquepaille writes "Julia Fields wrote a very well-documented article about 'smart' clothing that "would do everything from deliver a massage and improve your golf swing to change colour according to the weather" for the Edinburgh Evening News, "Tech out the latest in fashion." Fields spoke with Professor George Stylios from the Heriot-Watt University School of Textiles and Design who is working on clothes that can save lives. "This technology isn't going to go away. In 20 or 30 years, computers, telephones, and televisions will become part of our intimate clothing," he said. For more information, please read the original article. But for illustrations, visit this photo gallery. It contains pictures of Elise Co's Puddlejumper jacket, Hussein Chalayan's airplane dress, Adeline Andre's ScentOrgan dress and other smart clothes."

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Of all possible pr0st33z on the planet... (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7198939)

News For Turds just happens to get the fr1st.

Fuck you.

Love Always,
News For Turds

Smell Bubble (4, Funny)

gricholson75 (563000) | more than 10 years ago | (#7198950)

The objective is for the wearer to create their own personal 'smell bubble'
I think our sysadmin already has this clothing.

Re:Smell Bubble (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199047)

It's hard to take an article seriously when it uses the phrase "a spray of magic wellness molecules," isn't it?

thank you god! (1)

mschoolbus (627182) | more than 10 years ago | (#7198952)

Smart Clothing? Does this mean I won't get yelled at for my clothes not matching anymore?!

Re:thank you god! (1)

xanadu-xtroot.com (450073) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199124)

I'm color blind. I get this all the time. My closer friends know that I'm color blind and don't question my clothes anymore, but people that I run into (at the bar or whatever), do still mention it to me from time to time. I personally thought it was REALLY damn hard to "match" a pair of jeans, a t-shirt and a plaid flannel, but apperently it's possible.

Re:thank you god! (1)

pebs (654334) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199136)

There is nothing smart or fashionable about this "clothing"

Re:thank you god! (1)

Bob McCown (8411) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199208)

If this stuff runs Linux, can SCO sue the pants off me?

Re:thank you god! (1)

orthogonal (588627) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199220)

Smart Clothing? Does this mean I won't get yelled at for my clothes not matching anymore?!

Imagine how smart clothing would have to be to make the typical Slashdotter look stylish.

I mean, I mean, we could solve the problem of frickin' world hunger with the intelligence required to make Joe Dances With Trolls In Mom's Basement look absolutely fab.

We're talking Seymour Cray Casual Pants. We're talking Deep Blue Denim Jeans, We're talking a Beowulf Cluster of neck Ties.

Re:thank you god! (1)

heritage727 (693099) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199514)

Smart Clothing? Does this mean I won't get yelled at for my clothes not matching anymore?!
No, it means the clothes themselves will yell at you, freeing up your wife/girlfriend/mother for more productive tasks.

Know what's great about fashion shows? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7198953)

Sheer fabrics on hot models.

or Terry Hillson wearing pantyhose (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7198985)

I would love to touch her cute nyloned legs---yum yum---she is really hote. such a cute girl

Cheers: to science for smart clothes in 2024 (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7198961)

Jeers: to science for failing to bring us flying cars by 2000.

Re:Cheers: to science for smart clothes in 2024 (2, Funny)

kfg (145172) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199217)

They skipped flying cars and are going straight for flying underwear.

KFG

Re:Cheers: to science for smart clothes in 2024 (1)

djaxl (543958) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199368)

I for one welcome our new underwear masters [philips.com] .

Cmdr Taco is a nerd (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7198963)

there now i did it I offended Rob Malta, prepare to be modded down

Look like an ass much cheaper (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7198969)

Go to a sporting goods store and get yourself a fishing vest. You can look like a techno-wanker so much cheaper.

High Voltage Fun (1)

c_oflynn (649487) | more than 10 years ago | (#7198972)

I like the rain jacket:

High voltage inverter to power EL panels + water + human body = fun!

What time is it... (1)

gricholson75 (563000) | more than 10 years ago | (#7198973)

Also designed at the MIT by Megan Galbraith, Elroy is "an illuminating dress that encodes time information. The panels periodically reaarrange their illuminated pattern to express time to the wearer."
slap!!!
I wasn't staring at your boobs, I was checking the time!!

Re:What time is it... (1)

Sloppy (14984) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199252)

"Time for you to learn some manners! Look me in the eye reticle when you instant message me."

Eat smelly, rancid shit and grind it in your teeth (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7198982)


Tuxedo (1)

FatCobra (714836) | more than 10 years ago | (#7198991)

Have you guys seen Tuxedo starring Jackie Chan?, Id like to have that suit so that I could kung-fu all of sco

Re:Tuxedo (0)

fix3r (712740) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199251)

And don't forget the "James Brown" mode!

Not for me (3, Funny)

eenglish_ca (662371) | more than 10 years ago | (#7198993)

I plan on keeping my clothes for at least another 20 to 30 years after looking at the pictures in the article. Those clothes are absolutely hideous and when I press buttons I want something hard to push against, thats half the fun. Who wants to emit all of these "magic wellness molecules." Sounds a bit questionable to me. So you can keep smart clothes I'll stick with my current dumb clothes.

Re:Not for me (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199061)

so said the secretaries, business men, and IBM.

Look where we are now.

Give me a break! (1)

Pan T. Hose (707794) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199502)

"Smart" and "fashion" in one sentence? Give me a break! Repeat after me, kids: smart [thebee.com] people [oreillynet.com] don't [oreillynet.com] need [uni-frankfurt.de] fashion [caldera.com] . Let's face it: fashion is only for people who need some way to make up for the obvious lack of intelligence.

Won't work (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7198995)

This stuff won't help you get laid.

But Hemos may give give you a BJ if you whisper linux in his ear.

Smart clothing, stupid designers (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199003)


this will take off just like wearable computing, speech recognition and virtual reality has

Interesting choice of words (1)

David Price (1200) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199010)

In 20 or 30 years, computers, telephones, and televisions will become part of our intimate clothing...

Victoria's Secret to merge with Fry's. Film at 11.

Our intimate clothing??? (1)

3.5 stripes (578410) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199015)

So I'll have to strip down to answer my ringing undies*?

*Spiderman underoos.

Just what we need... (1)

Leomania (137289) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199016)

coupling the obsolescence cycle of computers with that of clothing. So when fashion trends come back around, you can't pull the clothes out of the back of the closet to wear again.

"Hey, cool tie! Oh, waitaminute... it's ancient. It only has a 133MHz StrongARM processor. How droll."

- Leo

intimate clothing? (1)

feed_those_kitties (606289) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199018)

"This technology isn't going to go away. In 20 or 30 years, computers, telephones, and televisions will become part of our intimate clothing"

I predict a new meaning to the AT&T commercial slogan -- "Reach out and touch someone!"

Blue Shirt of Death (1)

AtariAmarok (451306) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199026)

Does this mean the possibility of wearing Microsoft pants the crash?

pants THAT crash (1)

AtariAmarok (451306) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199058)

d'oh

Re:Blue Shirt of Death (1)

pebs (654334) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199155)

Does this mean the possibility of wearing Microsoft pants the crash?

Is that Microsoft in your pants or do you just have a bowel disorder?

Re:Blue Shirt of Death (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199229)

Ctl-Alt-Delete becomes

Sneeze-Fart-Secrete

Smart Clothing the death of... (1)

IA-Outdoors (715597) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199027)

...piercings of the mommy/daddy parts? I mean, why go through that pain if I can get the Ren and Stimpy boxers with the built in massager? Hell this may even save my marriage ;-)

Re:Smart Clothing the death of... (1)

Angram (517383) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199351)

You could integrate RFID into the piercings as a security feature - pants will only operate when sensor detects your [insert 'naughty bit'] ring.

what? (2, Funny)

jguevin (453329) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199039)

The objective is for the wearer to create their own personal 'smell bubble', by delivering a spray of magic wellness molecules to key points of the body in order to activate the smell centre. "magic wellness molecules"? "key points of the body"? What the hell is this talking about? Did they extract the magical essence of 100 smurfs? Have they finally discovered real mitichlorides (sp?)? Or does it just mean, "When your pits stink, they'll get sprayed with deodorant"?

Re:what? (1)

jguevin (453329) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199073)

Before any SW fanatics try their force grip on me, I'll correct my own spelling. "Midi-chlorians."

Remember Eric Le Fou? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199041)

In a recent /. posting about avoiding the "Batbelt Effect", someone mentioned Eric Le Fou (http://ericlefou.1.online.fr/ [online.fr] ), who got into the Guinness World Records Book for having a set of clothes containing ~1300 useful items. (http://ericlefou.1.online.fr/MES_TRUCS/MESobjets/ Mon_equipement/international.htm [online.fr] ) They weren't exactly "smart" clothing though.

Like Most... (1)

ClubStew (113954) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199069)

Like most fashion shows, one has to ask: "Who in the hell would wear this stuff?!"

With the exception of the stylish and practical Burton Amp jacket (also mentioned on /. some time back), the rest of the stuff is gaudy at best. I'll stick with my low-tech jeans and T-shirts for now, thank you.

Re:Like Most... (1)

Saige (53303) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199122)

Agreed - but then again, they're more just working on getting the technology down. And why use some fancy, stylish clothing when you're going to be cutting it up and inserting stuff and all that, just to show off the technology? Besides - would you really trust the sense of style of the type of people that would develop this technology?

I suspect once they actually get it working decently, then it'll start working it's way into clothing that is worth wearing. Maybe those $80 jeans some places sell will actually be likely to be worth the money when there's some technology in there. (This coming from someone who has a pair of $80 jeans because I just can't seem to help liking all the expensive clothes - of course, I like them before I find out they're so expensive and then have to decide whether or not to spend the money)

The puddlejumper jacket idea was interesting - though I'd like to see something fancier, with say ripples of light that expand outwards from wherever a drop of water lands on the jacket. That could be really cool... if you can turn it off, of course.

Some practical applications at last! (1)

JaredOfEuropa (526365) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199449)

With the exception of the stylish and practical Burton Amp jacket (also mentioned on /. some time back), the rest of the stuff is gaudy at best. I'll stick with my low-tech jeans and T-shirts for now, thank you.
True, but at least people are finally coming up with some useful applications of smart clothing. Clothing that changes its properties (and not just the color or lighting) according to the body or the environment. Clothing that monitors your heart. That Amp jacket is quite handy as well, I suppose.

Or, as mentioned, a jacket that will monitor and correct your golf swing. At least on the golf course you don't really have to worry what clothes you wear, now do you?

smart cullowning, a corepirate nazi's dream (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199071)

easing off on the mynuts won category? brings gnu meaning to the term 'he's got a bug up his .asp'. we'll just struggle along with the same old 'stupid' clothing, thanks.

the lights are coming up now.

it doesn't matter what you wear. just don't forget to show up.

moron payper liesense softwar gangster execrable... (Score:0, ?FunnIE?) yikes!

by Anonymous Coward on Monday October 13, @10:15AM (#7198768)

as it appLIEs to the georgewellian fuddite southern baptist freemason life0cide.

those whoreabull foulcurrs best get ready to see the light.

for each of the creator's innocents harmed, there is a badtoll that must/will be repaid by you/US, as the perpetrators of the crimewave against humankind, will not be available to make reparations, after the big flash.

consult with/trust in yOUR creator... more breathing... get ready to see the light. you know where to look?

Spot the female designer (1)

jazman (9111) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199072)

Changes colour according to the weather. Sigh. What about changing its waterproofness according to the weather? This is on a par with "So which car would go faster, a red one or a blue one?"

Re:Spot the female designer (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199132)

Changes color with the weather? I agree...not too useful.

Now, if the clothing could change color in response to a woman's mood, that would be great! Just like an octopus, they would turn red as a warning to any who might approach. It would be an interesting feedback mechanism. Wearing their heart on their sleeve, so to speak.

Re:Spot the female designer (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199133)

The red car would go faster.

Re:Spot the female designer (1)

Walterk (124748) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199162)

"So which car would go faster, a red one or a blue one?"
The one with flames [gotfuturama.com] painted on it.

in my opinion the puddlejumper is a great idea (1)

johnjay (230559) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199442)

It's just fun. Like those shoes that light up with every step that children get to wear. I think it would be really cool, on a drizzly night, to see pedestrians hurrying by, quietly flickering. ...especially if I was indoors :-)

The only thing that would bother me about the raincoat is power consumption. I wouldn't want to change the batteries on my coat all the time. I bet they could power it the same way they power those no-battery-no-wind wristwatches that get recharged by tiny weight swinging whenever you move your arm.

Also, an on/off switch to handle mosoon conditions might be appropriate.

By the way, in regards to those light-up sneakers. I don't understand why they don't make those for adults. Lots of sneakers look ridiculously flashy already, it's not as if the lights are going to make them substantially less cool. (Maybe there are adult-sized light-up sneakers and I just haven't seen them. I don't buy sneakers very often, so I'm probably just out of the loop.)

Re:in my opinion the puddlejumper is a great idea (1)

sTalking_Goat (670565) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199691)

They did make those for adults/teens in the mid nineties. All the major sneaker compaines (Nike, Reebok etc) had atleast one model. I remember because for about a six month period I begged my Mom to buy me a pair. She of course vehemently refused.

I think back on it now as one of the few (well maybe more than few) times my Mother was right. They were the height of fashion at the time but knowing my luck with such things I would probably have started wearing them the day after they went out of style and returned home with certain orifices flashing red led light everytime I moved.

By the way, I actually like the puddlejumper. I wouldn't wear one, but its a cool idea, even if it has no practical application (Well actually for bike riders it can keep you from getting run over)

Re:Spot the female designer (1)

kabocox (199019) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199600)


This is on a par with "So which car would go faster, a red one or a blue one?"

The blue one of course because it absorbs more of the higher freq. light than the red one. ;)

I can see it now... (1)

CrayzyJ (222675) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199074)

Dumping my snowboard wearing the Burton ski jacket. With each tumble the station & volume changes.

Not only will I LOOK bad, I'll sound stupid too.

Sounds like a scene out of the Simpsons:
D'oh! "today in the news" D'oh! "Exit light, Enter night.." D'oh! "I just called to say.." D'oh!

Re:I can see it now... (1)

Sideswiped (259402) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199138)

Could be... but if you gloves had some sort of a low electric current or even a magnet to trigger the buttons you would have nothing to worry about.

I have one(Analog MD Clone) (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199407)

Burton also owns a company called Analog who make a jacket like the Amp only called the MD Clone(Styled on a storm trooper outfit only all black) this comes with an MiniDisc player(as the name suggests) and has a slightly different control panel on the sleeve.

Trust me on this though, it is not as simple as the picture implies to use the buttons, you have to squeeze from both sides, and find the "lucky spot" for it to work, falling isn't going to do this although a well placed knock to the chest will sometimes start it if you don't have the minidisc buttons locked.

The think that impressed most people though(oddly enough) was the power switch inside the pocket to stop the buttons from working while your not wearing the jacket.

N-Sanity
n-sanity.net

maybe smart-MATCHING clothing? (1)

192939495969798999 (58312) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199088)

As much fun as surfing the internet from your shirt would be, what about just smart-matching clothes, that change color to match each other + your skin tone, etc? That would be awesome for us matching-clothing challenged persons.

Re:maybe smart-MATCHING clothing? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199552)

That's all we need, a good excuse for the sysadmin to only own 1 pair of pants and 1 shirt.

change color (1)

jwachter (319790) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199091)

Why would you ever want to wear clothes to change color based on the weather? Suddenly, your well-coordinated ensemble turns into a clown suit... sounds unappealing to me.

Fashion (1)

rf0 (159958) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199096)

Well TBH as much as I would like intellgent clothing which these clothes just remind me of saftey suits used in nuclear reactor. Now I know fashion designers live on cloud9 but if they look at the target market of geeks who will be the first adopters it ain't going to help

Rus

pants2pants (2, Funny)

AtariAmarok (451306) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199100)

"(AP) In the news today, the RIAA has sued Martin Winkleberry of Moose Wart, North Dakota alledging that his Levi's Dockers downloaded $660,000,000 million worth of copyrighted music files. During the arrest, Officer Ludmax was overheard to comment 'Is that a complete set of Beatles album files in your pants, or are you just glad to see me?' "

You missed a great opportunity.... (1)

mblase (200735) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199153)

The correct joke should be: "Is that a Bananarama [google.com] in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?"

Um... (3, Funny)

da3dAlus (20553) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199101)

Pardon me, miss, but I can see your panties through your "smell bubble". [See the Picture] [weblogs.com]

I'm holding out... (1)

Black Parrot (19622) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199103)


I'm still holding out for that +5 Cloak of Non-Dweebiness.[*]

When I get that and my flying car, the girls will love me.

[*] Cannot be worn by Rangers, Paladins, Television Meteorologists, and other naturally square characters.

SCO problems (3, Funny)

AtariAmarok (451306) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199120)

If any of the computerized clothing items contain Linux programming, SCO could literarlly sue the pants off you.

Re:SCO problems (1)

jonnyfivealive (611482) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199460)

holy crap, i think ive laughed at like all 3 of your posts here... nice

Excuse Me (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199134)

I think I caught a virus in my pants.

Re:Excuse Me (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199154)

Is that a worm in your pants or are you ha...

Does anyone remember? (1)

Sir Haxalot (693401) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199148)

This [slashdot.org] , way back in June.

MOD PARENT DOWN (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199262)

give it up sir haxalot

In other news... (1)

OzPhIsH (560038) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199150)

HyperColor shirts make fashion comeback! We all surrender to our color changing overlords... in Soviet Russia... with hot grits... in Natelie Portmans pants... Seriously though, while satisfying the geek kid in me, these clothes really don't do much for the practical adult side. Until my ungeekly girlfriend wants technofied clothes, these aren't gonna sell much of anything, at least in Europe/US. I envision this stuff taking off in Japan much sooner than here. That's where I would try to market it.

Excellent (2, Funny)

fuzzybunny (112938) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199172)


Forget the age-old technique of reducing your nervousness as a public speaker by imagine everyone without pants.

Now you can just make their pants fall down!

I can see it already: Microsoft RPC (Remote Pants Call) vulnerability discovered.

You could cause a buffer overflow...in someone's pants!

What about viruses? Could I unleash W32@Pants on the unsuspecting fashion world?

What if your jacket was a Mac and your pants run Windows? Would you need Samba to let your pants and yourt shirt communicate?

Man, why didn't I go into fashion design--you could blame mismatched colors and patterns on the user--RTFM, you idiot, your tie's crashed...

Re:Excellent (1)

kabocox (199019) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199626)

Just wait till "they" get color e-paper figured out. Paper isn't too off from cotton... t would be nice to have one nice quality shirt that would change to be what ever pattern you wanted. You could have "unlimited" clothing selection by have a "different" pattern applied to your shirt.

Is That A Telephone In Your Shorts? (1)

John Hasler (414242) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199185)

> This technology isn't going to go away. In 20 or
> 30 years, computers, telephones, and televisions
> will become part of our intimate clothing,"

A TV set in my underwear? No thanks.

Adeline Andre's ScentOrgan dress (0)

DaneelGiskard (222145) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199187)

Oh yeah, I'll get this one for my gf's birthday, I'm sure she will _love_ it and let me feel her appreciation for it!

</sarcasm>

Smart casual? (0)

mummers (253129) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199191)

Just a thought...

Think you have trouble with Airport Security now? (1)

blues5150 (161900) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199207)

Wait until you start wearing one of these jackets. Except for the see-through smell jacket your looking at a body-cavity search!

Golf swing? (1)

MikeCT (686254) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199213)

Making a shirt that will improve your golf swing is the easy part. The difficult part will be getting it past the Royal & Ancient dress code committee.

Burton iPod snowboard jacket (1)

LimeyInLeipzig (672345) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199214)

Burton do (or did) a jacket with connectors for an iPod complete with controls on the sleeve. A friend has one and it's well cool. Expensive though at $500. Amp Jacket PR release [apple.com]

my clothes will stay dumb, thank you (0)

ChipMonk (711367) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199215)

Clothes that do something conventient (like change color for coordination) are only a step away from clothes that do something inconvenient (like tell the police where you were two hours ago, no need for a search warrant). I warned about this [homelinux.org] almost a year ago.

A new development (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199226)

Clothing that's smarter than the person wearing the clothing!

moron the corepirate nazi happIE daze factshun (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199231)

from the wouldn't_want_to_wear_that_out dept.:

(CBS) A series of letters to hometown newspapers, purportedly written by U.S. soldiers in Iraq, contain identical language, according to the Gannett News Service. The letters praise the U.S. effort to rebuild the war-torn Mideast nation.

Gannett said it had turned up 11 identical letters from soldiers serving in Iraq with the 2nd Battalion of the 503rd Airborne Infantry Regiment. Six of the soldiers contacted by Gannett said they knew of the letters and agreed with their substance, but hadn't written them.

But another letter, purportedly written by a GI hospitalized for wounds suffered in a grenade attack, came as a surprise to Pfc. Nick Deaconson of Beckley, W.Va., according to his dad.

The soldier received a congratulatory phone call from his father, Timothy, for getting the letter published in the local newspaper.

"When I told him he wrote such a good letter, he said: 'What letter?'" Timothy Deaconson told Gannett. "This is just not his (writing) style."---

we should get that kind of 'coverage' for the creator's planet/population rescue initiative? that kind of high FUDgerIE could have only come from that giaNT ?pr? ?firm? fuddles&fudstorm et AL?

apparently, the felonous fauxking ediots upon the capitollist hill annex of wall street of deceit still think the creator is not watching/doesn't exist?

the lights are coming up now. you know who to consult with/trust, & where to look?

Teletubbies (1, Funny)

Texas Rose on Lava L (712928) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199232)

televisions will become part of our intimate clothing

So in 20-30 years it will be fashionable to look like a Teletubby? Scary.

Engineers getting their hands on a bra! (1, Funny)

CyberGarp (242942) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199249)

Notice the last entry in sports bras. Those engineers have a partially clothed women in the room and their looking at their wires and scope!

Insert joke about engineers getting a feel here

Re:Engineers getting their hands on a bra! (1)

CoolQ (31072) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199383)

Notice the last entry in sports bras. Those engineers have a partially clothed women in the room and their looking at their wires and scope!

Like this huge version of that photo [philips.com] ?

hears a splat sound on hundreds of geeks' monitors

--Quentin

Re:Engineers getting their hands on a bra! (1)

LittleGuy (267282) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199483)

Notice the last entry in sports bras. Those engineers have a partially clothed woman in the room and their looking at their wires and scope!

How do you know that the woman isn't also an engineer?

Insert lame Wonder-Bra joke here

Re:Engineers getting their hands on a bra! (1)

bluGill (862) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199757)

Those are not engineers, they are actors trying to look like engineers. The men are dressed 20 years out of date (though the equipment isn't qite that old). No engineer dresses like that anymore. The biggest clue, however, is their smile. It isn't the sort of half smile of an engineer comptemplating a hard problem it is the half smile of an actor who was just told drop the coversation to look "busy".

I wouldn't ahve said the above based on just the men though. They could caught in the act of switching focus, and just work for a "old way" company that hasn't caught onto modern dress codes. The female however doesn't fit. She isn't staring at the men like a "dumb blonde" amazed to meet someone who can think about something technical despite having her in the room, nor is she staring at the scope trace like another engineer who knows the problem and is trying to figgure out why they are getting that trace. She is trying to act like an engineer, while staring at a circuit board! It doesn't fit, all engineers have seen a circuit board before, and only stare them when replacing something, everything else to learn from the board is more easially learned from the engineering schetches (which were not in the picture).

I'm not sure why research into smart clothes would involve a tarditional inflexable circuit board for that matter.

Intel inside, Linux outside (0)

AtariAmarok (451306) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199263)

"Barb, look at Joe. Why is he wearing a tuxedo?"

"He just switched to Linux"

can't wait! (1)

locarecords.com (601843) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199266)

I am always forgetting my pda and phone so how cool to *always* have them with me by default.

With mp3's always there and my documents this would be fantastic...

However I am not convinced about typing emails on my jumper though I do think animated t-shirts are round the corner....

\run\dos\run\ (1)

seriv (698799) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199282)

This will put new meaning to the shirt that says:
C:\dos\
C:\dos\run\
\run\dos\run\

-seriv

What is that smell? (1)

Txiasaeia (581598) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199295)

"In 20 or 30 years, computers, telephones, and televisions will become part of our intimate clothing..."

And we wonder why the Machines will rise up to enslave us! [whatisthematrix.com]

Top 10 Implications of Cyber-clothes (0)

AtariAmarok (451306) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199347)

10. "Dude, you're getting new underwear"

9. The Apple Figleaf Newton

8. Atari FunPants, complete with joystick.

7. The deceased laid out in a shroud that is running *BSD, all ready for the funeral.

6. Trademark Gateway-brand white underwear with large brown spots all over it.

5. Levi's button-USB

4. Blue jeans, blue tooth.

3. The digital divide starts to really hit the nudist colonies pretty bad.

2. Hands-free trouser-mouse

1. If you wear clothes, you have to pay $669 to SCO.

0. "I, for one, welcome our new WiFi-enabled parka overlords"

Security? (1)

Angram (517383) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199396)

I'm hoping they integrate some GPS tracking, or going to the gym could cost you thousands.

Why would i want TV in my smalls? (1)

trash eighty (457611) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199461)

"This technology isn't going to go away. In 20 or 30 years, computers, telephones, and televisions will become part of our intimate clothing,"

How futuristic! TV and telephone in my underpants!

Ewwww (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7199653)

computers, telephones, and televisions will become part of our intimate clothing.

Does that mean Im going to have to put up with some power pack knocking against my balls all day? Hmmm....

Gnomes' problem finally sollved? (2, Funny)

orthogonal (588627) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199667)

1. Collect underwear

2. Self-collecting underwear

3. Profit!

crash? (1)

micronix1 (590179) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199681)

if the "smart clothing" crashes, does the wearer have to strip naked, reboot his clothes and put them back on?

US UK (1)

CGP314 (672613) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199703)

would do everything from deliver a massage and improve your golf swing to change colour according to the weather

Could it spell color the way I want it to? Or is it to busy giving me a massage to print the message?

Wanna see my cluster? (1)

CognitiveFusion (602570) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199704)

I go to a lot of conferences, etc. where you are required to wear a badge. Some of these are pin-on or magnet-based... *pins badge on* ZZZT... Damn! I just spiked my system bus! And you thought the tags in the collar of your shirt itched, just wait until you start experiencing "hot-spots". I'd prefer my smart clothing in accessory items that can be used with different outfits.

Amusing (1)

serutan (259622) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199706)

Sometimes it's fun to read a technology article written by someone who has no clue. I especially liked the bits about the "spray of magic wellness molecules," and the researchers "demonstrating the technology device." Alas, I know and work with many people who already have their own personal scent bubbles.

Back to the Future quote... (1)

wiggly-wiggly (682254) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199737)


Your jacket is now dry.

Downloadable designs (1)

CognitiveFusion (602570) | more than 10 years ago | (#7199763)

Another project at the renowned Central Saint Martins Innovation Centre in London is integrating electronics into fabrics that would allow consumers to customise their clothing by downloading different patterns or colours. The garment would act like a display in the same way as a computer screen.

The release of these clothing items will soon be followed by the much-sought-after Remote Transparency Crack.

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