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Gates Comdex Keynote Shows Plans, Matrix Spoof

simoniker posted more than 10 years ago | from the he-knows-kung-fu dept.

Microsoft 803

An anonymous reader writes "According to Eweek, Bill Gates' keynote speech at this year's Comdex showed Microsoft's 'focus on security, spam and [the] tablet PC', including a new version of its Internet Security and Acceleration (ISA) Server, an extension of the SmartScreen Technology for spam prevention, and the next version of the Microsoft Windows XP Tablet PC Edition operating system. But the showstopper was a filmed spoof of The Matrix (screencaps available here), with Gates and Steve Ballmer as Morpheus and Neo respectively, and including a jab at Linux."

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It all makes sense now (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497272)

Gates plans to trap humanity in his own MS Matrix. Of course, there will be bugs in the system allowing people like Neo to pop-up and hack in.

Re:It all makes sense now (4, Funny)

Kethinov (636034) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497314)

You don't need a godlike Neo to hack a pathetic Windows-based Matrix...

Re:It all makes sense now (0, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497359)

Nope, it should be as simple as gaining root on an unpatched Lunix box, like it happened to open source icons SourceForge and VIA a coupla years ago. Remember? The guy even hacked into the Akamai boxes serving ads. It was hilarious!!!

But, um, you were saying? Don't let reality intrude upon your wishful zealotry.

Re:It all makes sense now (4, Funny)

Frymaster (171343) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497383)

Gates plans to trap humanity in his own MS Matrix.

wrong. gates is smith! did you see the market share that guy had by the end of the series?

Re:It all makes sense now (5, Funny)

Mr Smidge (668120) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497408)

Ooh, ooh.. is SCO the architect, creator of the Matrix?

Matrix XP (2, Funny)

henni16 (586412) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497449)

Gates plans to trap humanity in his own MS Matrix

You mean like that [matrix-xp.com] ? ;-)

Re:It all makes sense now (3, Funny)

mattjb0010 (724744) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497483)

As the little kid says, "there is no security".

So witty.... (0)

shftleft (261411) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497275)

OMG linux got pwned.

FUCKING CUNT (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497490)

CUNNNNNNNNNT! Fcuc yfua fucking afakcun!

Intersing book on the history of Comdex (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497278)

link [amazon.com]

Re:Intersing book on the history of Comdex (0, Troll)

mrshowtime (562809) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497324)

OMG, that is THE most horrible thing I have ever clicked on! DO NOT CLICK IT! IT is a woman in a bathtub shitting on herself, and I'm being conserverative....OMG Blaaahaghhhhhhhh!

Re:Intersing book on the history of Comdex (1)

ShadarLogoth (716690) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497348)

That's why you should carefully examine any link from slashdot for references to www.tubgirl.com or goatse... it's kinda deep in there, but it's definitely in there.

*snip*
3A//www.google.com/url%3Fq%3Dhttp%3A//ww w.tubgirl. com/&intel_xscale_p%26sa%3Dl%
*snip*

now you know;)

--Shadar

I'd love to examine links here, but (1)

freeweed (309734) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497488)

Unfortunately, thanks to Slashdot's way of formatting URLs to display the domain name to the stupid right in the post (and yes, I do mean stupid, that's what the status bar is for), I can get caught on these all the time.

For whatever reason, Opera 6 just shows the [domain.com] part in the status bar, not the entire URL like it should.

I'm really surprised that Slashdot works better on IE than it does on Opera, but the irony doesn't escape me ;)

For the record (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497356)

For the record, she's commonly known as "Tub Girl". Note also how the lady's genitals are fuzzy-focussed, so that no-one is offended :)

Re:Intersing book on the history of Comdex (1)

PatrickThomson (712694) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497380)

not bad, but combine the longness with tinyurl and you have a killer.

first post (-1, Redundant)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497287)

haha

Re:first post (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497361)

you fail it, in a distinct and pronounced way.

well? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497289)

So which one made themself black to be Morpheus?

Re:well? (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497407)

He's not "black", he's a FUCKING NIGGER!

Get it right next time.

Thankyou.

Say what you will (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497296)

But I laughed out loud when I saw those pictures. At least those guys know how to enjoy themselves. (Ok, back to the hatred and rumormongering).

The pills... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497301)

Okay, so the 'red/M$' pill looks normal sized, but the 'blue/IBM' pill, looks like an elephant suppository.. gee.. I wonder which one Ballmer really wanted..

---
Don't be so uptight.. it's sopposed to be a joke!

Re:The pills... (5, Interesting)

Pharmboy (216950) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497395)

The irony is that Linux still has a very small market share, but Billy's response to Linux in this spoof, by linking it to IBM, tends to make Linux even bigger than it is, and makes it look like it is more competition than it is yet.

As someone who has been in marketing for 20 years now, I know the best way to make your competition look small is ignore them in public, and sweat them in private. This is just petty crapola by Billy and Company, but it serves to make MS look bad, and Linux to look better by being the butt of a joke made by "the evil empire". I mean, the method they used to parody Linux is fine, even remotely humorous, but doesn't serve their marketing dept. very well.

Seriously, this may sound odd to some of you, but this is a fundamental marketing mistake, this is Marketing 201 stuff, not that advanced. This is typical of a company that thinks it is invincible, or thinks the competition can never catch up. Problem is, no one else believes this except Billy and Co.

Still Better (5, Funny)

The_Rippa (181699) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497306)

Hmm...still looks better than Revolutions.

Not a troll, it's the truth (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497343)

It does, and that's kinda sad.

already slashdotted... (1)

QuantumSlip (613532) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497307)

anyone have mirrors?

Re:already slashdotted... (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497350)

here's one [greatscopes.com]

Re:already slashdotted... (1)

indianajones428 (644219) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497415)


Is Microsoft hosting this anywhere? I'm sure they could handle the bandwidth.

And if they can't? Well, I don't think anybody here would mind...

Re:already slashdotted... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497419)

yep [alltooflat.com]

Re:already slashdotted... (0, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497429)

Gates Opens Comdex with Focus on Security, Spam and Tablet PC
By Matt Hicks
November 17, 2003

LAS VEGAS--Taking the stage at Comdex here for the 20th year, Microsoft Chairman Bill Gates offered a status report on how the company is moving toward bridging the gaps among software.

Gates on Sunday showcased new versions of Microsoft software aimed at securing enterprises, fighting spam, increasing mobility and improving information access. All served as examples of the need to move toward what he's calling "seamless computing."

ADVERTISEMENT

Just as Gates in his first Comdex appearance in 1983 highlighted software's central role, this year he emphasized how software needs to be better connected together in order for IT to reach its full potential. That means software must work across different devices, applications, services, distended anuses of Michael Sims, and networks, he said.

"By breaching these boundaries and getting rid of these seams...we can deliver all the scenarios that we've dreamed about since tubgirl got started on rotten.com," Gates said.

Gates opened a Comdex that promises to be stripped down from the glitz and big crowds of its heyday. Organizers are promoting a show focused squarely on business IT and expecting about 50,000 attendees, half the attendance of last year. The nearby Adult Dex now attracts 400,000 annual attendees, largely due to the fact that Steve Ballmer's bald pink ass is only present at Comdex.

As Microsoft moves to hem the software seams, it cannot escape the issue of security. As Gates put it, "We really have to get the fundamentals right."

The latest addition to Microsoft's security effort, which began about two years ago, is a new version of its Internet Security and Acceleration (ISA) Server. Gates previewed ISA 2004 during his keynote. Along with offering traditional firewall capabilities, it provides application layer security, Gates said.

In the first public demonstration of the new version of ISA Server, a Microsoft product manager showed how ISA Server 2004 allows an administrator to drill down into policies such as Web access rules to block specific applications such as peer-to-peer file sharing programs using the software's HTTP filtering technology.

A public beta of ISA Server 2004 will be available in early 2004, the company said.

On the spam front, Gates announced that Microsoft in the coming months will be adding its SmartScreen Technology into Microsoft Exchange. Microsoft is planning an add-on to Exchange Server 2003 for spam filtering called Exchange Intelligent Message Filter for early next year.

SmartScreen Technology, which Gates said is already being used with MSN and Hotmail e-mails accounts as well as in Outlook 2003, is Microsoft's spam-filtering technology. It assigns a probability score to each incoming message based on user feedback, and that information is then used to help filter out spam.

As expected, Gates also debuted the next version of the Microsoft Windows XP Tablet PC Edition operating system. It will be available in the first half of 2004 and will be free for Tablet PC customers, he said.

It features improved handwriting recognition and deeper integration of the tablet pen support within XP.

Beyond the near term, Gates also delved further into the future. He touted the coming advances in Microsoft's next Windows release, code-named Longhorn, including the new Windows File System and new visualization capabilities.

"It's a very ambitious piece of work," he said, noting that Microsoft "is not even giving the timeframe."

One of Longhorn's goals has been to improve the ability of users to search and find information no matter where it is stored. Gates on Sunday touted work within Microsoft Research to improve information retrieval.

"People are spending a lot of time acting as file clerks," said Susan Dumais, a senior researcher at Microsoft Research who joined Gates on stage.

Called "Stuff I've Seen,' the research technology allows a user, from one place, to search and retrieve information from across applications, the Web and file types. Researchers also are working on contextualized search so that searches for relevant information take place automatically as a user is working on a document or creating an e-mail.

Re:already slashdotted... (5, Informative)

Traicovn (226034) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497438)

Mirror of the images [msstate.edu]

Re:already slashdotted... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497470)

Thanks. These are hilarious. I hope the video surfaces soon.

Mr.Smith is the "developers" Ballmer so frequently mentions.

How many times... (5, Insightful)

SniperPuppy (443143) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497308)

How many times can Bill get on stage, claim that "Microsoft is refocusing its effors into security", and be believable? I mean, they supposedly shifted all these resources into fixing the holes in Windows, and, well, we all know how well THAT went. Now we're supposed to roll over, forget about that, and say, "Oh, okay. He means it this time. I believe him."?

Re:How many times... (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497326)

Hey Mr butt snot- I have got about 5 MS critical update patches PER WEEK for about the past 6 weeks. If that aint focusing on security, then you are a moron.

+5 FUNNY (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497375)

Unintentionally so, but still. =)

Re:+5 FUNNY (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497427)

Well I've got more than ten from Redhat in the same period of time! So nuts to him.

Sure Redhat wasn't exactly sure which ones I really needed, but we can't all be microsoft can we?

Well... (1, Troll)

bonch (38532) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497489)

Why don't you compare the number of holes this month in Windows Server 2003 compared to, say, Red Hat 9 or Debian?

Oh the Irony (1)

Brahmastra (685988) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497312)

In the spoof, Bill gates accuses IBM of stifling innovation.

Re:Oh the Irony (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497340)

Oh the big irony? Sorry - IBM mainframe humor.

Re:Oh the Irony (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497378)

:cough:OS/2:cough: :cough:smalltalk:cough:

what else, what else has IBM simply 'let go'

Re:Oh the Irony (4, Funny)

Frymaster (171343) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497416)

lets look at the ms track record in the innovation department.

  • dos: bought
  • nt: bought as vms
  • powerpoint: bought
  • excel: bought
  • windows ui: liberally, uh, borrowed from apple
  • word: it's a word processor for chrissake! that's innovative?
  • ms bob: 100% microsoft's idea
    • thank you bill for pusing the envelope.

Re:Oh the Irony (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497493)

Uh, oh:
  • SCO: bought

Those who forget history... (4, Insightful)

freeweed (309734) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497442)

Ah, kids today.

Some of you may not be aware of this, but at one point (20-25 years ago) Microsoft was seen as the little guy, fighting against the big, powerful, market-dominating, innovation-stifling IBM. Remind anyone of a certain penguin?

Microsoft has turned into everything they used to be against (and sometimes worse). Kinda reminds me of what happens to revolutionaries in the political world. Let's just hope Linus' ego can be kept in check :)

Re:Oh the Irony (1)

AKnightCowboy (608632) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497501)

In the spoof, Bill gates accuses IBM of stifling innovation.

No matter how rich that guy gets he still reminds me of that stupid geek from Revenge of the Nerds. I guess money can't buy everything.

If Microsoft built the matrix (2, Funny)

rf0 (159958) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497313)

Then the glitches would be a feature
Agent Smith would need to be updated ever 2 weeks to avoid the latest expolit which would allow Neo to destroy him
It would have to be rebooted every month to free up the memory leaks

Rus

Re:If Microsoft built the matrix (5, Funny)

Verteiron (224042) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497397)

Actually, that doesn't sound too different from the movie plot. Agent Smith obviously hadn't been patched because Neo exploited him immediately upon gaining Administrator access. And we learned that the Matrix must be "reloaded" periodically to fix the humans that "leak" from the main program...

Re:If Microsoft built the matrix (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497446)

And Neo would have to pay the Oracle $60 up-front just to talk to her over the phone.

omg ror lolf (-1, Troll)

Clockwurk (577966) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497503)

LOLOLOLOL!!!11!!!!!111

Why don't you go fuck yourself cocksucker.

Hmmm... (5, Funny)

Bob Vila's Hammer (614758) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497316)

I didn't know the Borg had a sense of humor.

Re:Hmmm... (2, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497338)

Actually, it's pretty typical for company meetings to feature a video like this one. Those are for internal consumption only, though, as they tend to bash pretty much everybody. They're almost always humorous, and occasionally absolutely hysterical.

Re:Hmmm... (4, Funny)

ShadowDrake (588020) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497403)

I never understood that about the Borg. Presumably they would have assimilated *some* marketing staff over the years, enabling them to come up with a better slogan than "Resistance is Futile"... perhaps "Assimilation makes you fresh and sexually appealing, while saving money on long distance!"

I have...nothhing (1, Funny)

Fux the Penguin (724045) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497317)

Seriously, I was planning to troll this topic or something, but...I've got nothing. It's just too lame. I mean, it's like trying to make fun of a clown by mocking his big floppy shoes or tiny car, stuffed with other clowns. It simply falls flat.

Really. I got nothing. Sorry. Make up your own jokes.

Re:I have...nothhing (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497353)

well, thanks very much for pointing out that you have nothing to contribute, much like your post really, because as we all know - without you and your Stellar brand of humour, we would be completely and utterly fucked and left jokeless for an entire thread! OH THE HUMANITY OF IT ALL!

you should go back to mommy now and ask her to pay you some attention...

Re:I have...nothhing (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497499)

Geez, guys. Don't reward this trolling cocksucker.
This wanker is just a troll. Check out his journal [slashdot.org] and mod the bastard down. You'll find that most if not all of his comments are actually lifted from others.

Man oh man! (1, Funny)

macshune (628296) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497318)

What I wouldn't pay to be Ballmer's stunt double and accidentally pop Bill Gates in the nose!

And props to microsoft having the matrix run off of linux. Guess that makes sense. Can't have the matrix crashing because it feels like it! People's lives would be at stake!

Microsoft: Demonstrating through movie parodies that Linux is a better choice than Windows for system-critical environments

oh good f'ing god. (0, Offtopic)

mgoodman (250332) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497320)

just 3 comments when i clicked on the link and already slashdotted. thats ridiculous.

Re:oh good f'ing god. (1)

ckathens (631781) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497346)

Worth it just to see the sort of BS Mr. Gates tries to pull out of his ass. Just seems unnatural to seem him anything other than the most boring geeky pastel sweaters. And as Morpheus?? Please beeyotch, you're like that little kid in the first Matrix who programs the woman in the red dress because he can't get any himself....

Re:oh good f'ing god. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497352)

Absolutely crazy. Mirrors Anyone?

Re:oh good f'ing god. (1)

Drooling_Sheep (683079) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497394)

it was only a series of small sometimes blurry pictures, no video so you didnt miss much

ASEJASLDGADADSG:LJSD!!@ (3, Funny)

DAQ42 (210845) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497323)

Now that is just wrong.
Wrong I tell you.

So very, very wrong that I cannot begin to fathom just how craptastically crappy this crap is.

Imagine. Using a popular culture movie to debase your competition and promote your crappy vaporware. Where do I sign up for this crap? I want off your lists. All of them. And your parent company lists too. No, don't try and sell me your product by linking it to a popular movie reference, please. Let it stand on it's own merit. Oh, you say it's all smoke and mirrors and you don't have the features I want? Too bad, no money for you, bye now.

Grrr.

Re:ASEJASLDGADADSG:LJSD!!@ (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497342)

I bet you would get all hard up here if a cute chick was using a Linux laptop in a Hollywood flick. You would be like, oh, this is so progressive, Hollywood finally gets it, and oh yeah, that episode with boss fighting BSOD is just jilarious.

Ballmer as Neo? (4, Funny)

EmCeeHawking (720424) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497327)

Gates and Steve Ballmer as Morpheus and Neo respectively

Um, I thought Ballmer was the fat one.

I can much more easily picture Morpheus dancing around the Zion cave shouting "DEVELOPERS! DEVELOPERS!" ad naseum, than Neo.

need explanation, "DEVELOPERS!" (1)

happyfrogcow (708359) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497463)

"...shouting "DEVELOPERS! DEVELOPERS!" ad naseum"

What is the background of this "walking around stage shouting "DEVELOPERS! DEVELOPERS!..."? I thought it was in reference to a Larry Wall "State of the Onion" speech, but now it's tied loosely to Balmer. So, could someone please inform me?

Bad comparison (3, Funny)

T-Kir (597145) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497329)

I mean come on!!! A more appropriate spoof would be that those two were the virus version Smith (crikey, I'm writing this now and listening to the Animatrix OST and Red Pill Blue Pill is on!!!)... yeah Longhorn would have to be the Matrix code, constraining humanity and the problem is choice: which MS don't want people to have.

Plus, the Matrix is due for a critical crash, hmm the parrallels are endless...

Re:Bad comparison (1)

ckathens (631781) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497386)

LOL didn't even realize that -- second and third movie are all about "Choice". Yet what is M$ presenting us with? No choice! Lovely...

Re:Bad comparison (1)

gl4ss (559668) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497437)

and the architecht(ms bigwit) is unable to make a (moral) choice since everything is an (monetary)equation to him.

-

seriously though.. somebody could post the gandhi reference again(and knowing slashdot, somebody will)..

though.. i guess ms would like the ordinary people apart from them to think that the underlying code is some matrix magic and they'd better stick to visual basic.

ARRGH (1)

McCarrum (446375) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497330)

Gates as Morpheus. Can someone please stab my minds eye?

And starring the tablet PC... (5, Funny)

Nailer (69468) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497331)

As Switch. One of the Nebuchadnezzar crew that got killed really early on the first movie and was promptly forgotten about forever.

They spoofed the wrong film (0)

Amsterdam Vallon (639622) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497333)

The Matrix film series are very popular but deep down very skimpy on plot and the other finer things that make good movies great.

Therefore, The Matrix is actually very much like Microsoft -- a staple in the science category that is very, very popular but overrated.

Linux is more like a wonderful independent film that has great devoted followers, but is not quite mainstream.

So, Mr. Gates, you and your henchmen are really just making fun of yourselves.

Reply if you agree with me, or if you don't, indicate why you think The Matrix is like Linux.

Thanks. I'll enjoy tabulating these results.

Re:They spoofed the wrong film (1)

Camel Pilot (78781) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497508)

Linux is more like a wonderful independent film that has great devoted followers, but is not quite mainstream.

You mean like the Blair Witch Project? :0

Hot Sauce and gourmet stuff [sammcgees.com]
Linux and Mozilla customers get 5%

Remember the end (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497334)

Remember, while MS/Neo may look like he will defeat the Linux/Matrix, Linux/Matrix will prevail in the end.

Comdex? (4, Funny)

sulli (195030) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497345)

Isn't that dying faster than *BSD?

Obviously all the comments here will be about... (2, Insightful)

SlashDotAgent (700292) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497351)

The Matrix spoof, and not about the business plan.

A true test of your server (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497354)

And we get

Forbidden

You don't have permission to access /pictures/comdex2003billg2.shtml on this server.

Additionally, a 403 Forbidden error was encountered while trying to use an ErrorDocument to handle the request.

Gates and Ballmer? Which one was Neo? (5, Funny)

u-235-sentinel (594077) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497357)

I haven't seen it (yet) but doesn't Neo die in the movie :D

Which is Neo again? :D

Re:Gates and Ballmer? Which one was Neo? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497448)

Balmer is "neo". Except in the flick he's called "steve-o" instead of "neo".

Now that Bill is focusing on spam/security, ... (1)

burgburgburg (574866) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497358)

I can sit back and take it easy. Bill's on the job. I'm going to go take a nap.

Wake me when the web is working.

What's wrong with this picture. (5, Funny)

FrostedWheat (172733) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497366)

Neo: What is the Matrix?
Morpheus: Unfortunately no one can be told what the Matrix is.
Neo: Why?
Morpheus: My tablet PC just crashed.

Doesn't anyone subscribe to Slashdot? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497371)

I thought after subscriptions started there'd be legions of eager-beaver subscribers with mirrors ready to go for every article.
But here we are, comments piling up, site completely slashdotted, subscriber-only period long since passed, and not one mirror!
Or is it that the karma-whoring eager-beavers are not the same people who see it in their heart to support Slashdot with money?

dying (0, Troll)

sewagemaster (466124) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497377)

with Gates and Steve Ballmer as Morpheus and Neo respectively, and including a jab at Linux

it all makes sense now!
no wonder trinity dies from logos' (windows logo == windows) crash!

Faster link (1)

Brahmastra (685988) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497381)

here [yahoo.com]

Just another case of less bread (1)

i_r_sensitive (697893) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497384)

and more circuses.

Tablet ego (1)

EmbeddedJanitor (597831) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497385)

The Tablet is Bill Gates' pet project. He keeps pushing it even though the world at large does not want it.

Either the Tablet is so bound up in Bill's ego that he needs to push it this hard or else this is a diversion from the fact that MS has absolutely nothing else to show the world in terms of new product etc.

The good news, IMHO, so long as they keep spending and putting attention into the tablet they're keeping out of stuff that matters.

Re:Tablet ego (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497497)

If your precious STEVE JOBS came out with a tablet, you'd JIZZ all over it.

Matrix spoof (5, Interesting)

cyber_rigger (527103) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497388)

Borland did this years ago [drbob42.com]


Borland Matrix spoof

So much for Microsoft inovation.

I can't wait... (4, Funny)

greenskyx (609089) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497390)

For the part where Agent Linux burns Bills eyes out and then he finally can see all the Linux everywhere...

what a sad spectacle (1)

Damek (515688) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497393)

I just saw the shots of the video - man, those pics of Gates & Ballmer in trenchcoats have to be some of the saddest pics I've ever seen. I mean, sad like flames painted on a Geo Metro. What a sorry waste of good material those outfits were...

Now, a Matrix spoof staring Tux as Neo and Linus as Morpheus... now you're talking! ;)

Pajama Party (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497396)

Funny how Gates and Balmer look more like they are sitting around at a pajama party brushing each other's hair than they look like they are practicing their sparring.

Billy: "Like... didn't Johnny look cute at scool today!"
Stevie: "Like... for sure."
Billy: "I got my period today."

anyone have a mirror? (1)

kaan (88626) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497404)

lemmee guess, www.tabletpctalk.com is hosted by IIS? regardless, the site is hugely sucking thanks to El Slashdot Effect.

Re:anyone have a mirror? (2, Informative)

deadmeat (12666) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497476)

Nope. According to netcraft:

The site www.tabletpctalk.com is running Apache/1.3.20 Sun Cobalt (Unix) Chili!Soft-ASP/3.6.2 mod_ssl/2.8.4 OpenSSL/0.9.6b mod_gzip/1.3.26.1a PHP/4.0.6 mod_auth_pam_external/0.1 FrontPage/4.0.4.3 mod_perl/1.25 on Linux.

Comwhat? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497409)

Comdex is no longer relevent. It's interesting to see who doesn't know that.

Great (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497412)

If they focus on spam the same way they focused on security my spam will drop by.....no, wait, it will increase.

Interesting choice of characters (5, Insightful)

nodwick (716348) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497417)

It's interesting that they've positioned Linux as the Matrix (the establishment), and Microsoft as Neo/Morpheus (the underdogs/rebels). I'd have thought the reverse would be a more accurate analogy ...

Mirror - pictures only (4, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497426)

pictures only [shutterfly.com]

vid clip (0, Redundant)

Robocrap (652257) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497458)

vid clip at http://www.microsoft.com/billgates/speeches/2003/1 1-16comdex2003.asp

the que is at: 16:05

enjoy.


(or not)

How about a realistic film clip... (1)

i_r_sensitive (697893) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497462)

Perhaps inspired by the French Revolution.

We'll cast Bill gates as Marie Antoinette ("Let them eat WORMS!") and Linus Torvaalds at the head of the unruly mob.

At least that would be a case of art imitating life...

Mirror (may not be up for long) (3, Informative)

mskfisher (22425) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497481)

This is a bad idea, but here's a mirror:
I reserve the right to replace these with smaller versions if it gets hammered too hard...

The Matrix spoof looks nice from the screenshots.. (0, Redundant)

SlashDotAgent (700292) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497484)

Where can we get it?? B-)

It's about time... (1)

bengoerz (581218) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497494)

It's about time someone in the computer world roughed up Gates a little bit. (http://www.shutterfly.com/my/slide2.jsp?auto=0&i= 67b0de21b35a74a7e4c1&idx=42.) Good to see Balmer has it in him. But seriously, a story about the "Internet Security and Acceleration (ISA) Server" gets slashdotted immediately? Sounds like these guys are really going to follow through on their performance promises.

[cue, spooky, decision making music] (1)

A_Non_Moose (413034) | more than 10 years ago | (#7497498)

Morpheous: You take the BSOD pill, the story ends and you wake up and believe whatever you want to about your lost data.

You take the red pill, and...aw, shit, the red pill just BSOD'd too.

You're screwed either way...which BSOD pill you want?

Propaganda (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 10 years ago | (#7497502)

For idiotic propaganda delivered as a Matrix parody, nothing beats The Meatrix [themeatrix.com] . I'd like to see some of these guys start getting sued just so we don't have to put up with this tripe.

-Dave
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