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U.S. Attorney General John Ashcroft Resigns

timothy posted more than 9 years ago | from the cautious-phrasing dept.

United States 1275

andyring writes "In a move that will undoubtedly make many /. readers jump for joy (although perhaps not myself), Attorney General John Ashcroft announced he will resign, according to multiple news sources. While many here dislike him, others have more favorable opinions of him. He became the point man on the USA Patriot Act, which typically ignites harsh opinions on both sides of the aisle." Reader cnsc1rtr , referring to the AP's version of the story, writes "He gave Bush a five-page, handwritten letter in which he stated, 'The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.'"

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1275 comments

SAFE! (5, Funny)

Elwood P Dowd (16933) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771269)

'The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.'

That is the BEST NEWS EVER! How come he didn't tell us about this before?

Re:SAFE! (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771319)

I'm sure that sentence was taken out of context. How about the few sentences before and after, please? I'm sick of the liberal bias of the editors. It's ridiculous.

Re:SAFE! (2, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771445)

How come he didn't tell us about this before?
Because the election was November 2.

na/a (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771270)

the first is me

Today Ashcroft (5, Funny)

rbochan (827946) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771273)

Tomorrow Cheney!

oh please oh please oh please oh please oh please oh please oh please

Re:Today Ashcroft (-1, Redundant)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771339)

HOW INSIGHTFUL!

mods, if you mod the parent up you're a fag. period.

Re:Today Ashcroft (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771352)

Sorry, you're stuck with Cheney. :-)

Re:Today Ashcroft (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771429)

Are you kidding?!? Cheney is Bush's life insurance! (Think about it...)

Re:Today Ashcroft...Tomorrow Justice Ashcroft (5, Insightful)

Dante333 (25148) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771455)

Your thinking short term. Now that he isn't a AG, he can be a SCJ.

thank you for your service (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771274)

now piss off you wanker

does that mean... (5, Funny)

ZiakII (829432) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771275)

does that mean i can take off my tinfoil hat?

Re:does that mean... (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771327)

no, and it's probably not safe to walk the streets with your blow up doll either.

I'm Confused! (4, Funny)

Steve B (42864) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771278)

He gave Bush a five-page, handwritten letter in which he stated, 'The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.

I thought that it was the overthrow of Saddam Hussein that did that....

LOL (5, Funny)

John Seminal (698722) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771384)

He gave Bush a five-page, handwritten letter in which he stated, 'The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.

And Bush had to have someone read it to him.

There is a GOD. (2, Insightful)

DeepFried (644194) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771286)

Good riddance! I wonder how long it will take to undo what he has done.

Re:There is a GOD. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771363)

your people are calling him bush
we just call him satan

Re:There is a GOD. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771376)

I wonder why anyone would mod that up.

(mod me up as well, if you mod the parent up, because i'm saying just as much).

We Won! (5, Funny)

dasheiff (261577) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771291)

'The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.'

Yey we won! Now we can pull out of Iraq. No more airport security lines. I just hope W. can read script.

Re:We Won! (5, Funny)

Elizabeth007 (829402) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771400)

Hey, wait just a damned second here.

I voted for that Bush guy because we weren't safe, and less than two weeks later we are?

That was sarcasm. I swear.

Re:We Won! (0, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771412)

W. can read? wow respect

Good Riddance (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771292)

That man has done more to eliminate and destroy our constitutional rights than any AG in history *(and yes that includes Reno). Good riddance to a would-be tyrant.

So .... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771293)

when are Collin Powell and Condoleeza Rice resigning? No, seriously. They seem to have taken a hit in their personal status because of these last 4 years.

I Don't follow politics much .. (1)

Vardamir (266484) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771294)

But even so, I never would have seen this coming.

Re:I Don't follow politics much .. (4, Informative)

eln (21727) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771359)

He resigned because of health problems and exhaustion. Apparently he has been having various medical difficulties over the past year or so. I don't think this one was Bush's decision.

Slow first posts (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771295)

I spent 30 seconds reading the lead before posting.

I think the collective response from slashdot has been "shock and awe" - so much so that we don't see the typical "first post" crap.

Either that or everyone's popping a beer to celebrate.

--AC

Good Riddence (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771296)

And not anytime too soon !

first post (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771297)

first post

FP (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771298)

Boo Yeah!

Huh? (4, Funny)

Blue Neon Head (45388) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771300)

"The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved."

Phew! Finally. Guess we don't need a DoJ anymore.

Mission Accomplished (5, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771301)

> 'The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.'

At what cost?

Re:Mission Accomplished (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771396)

currently total: more in 4 years than Clinton spent in 8.

Mixed Feelings (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771303)

Well, the USA PATRIOT act isn't a good mark on anyone's resume. John Ashcroft was a good, Christian AG. He respected the RKBA and went after child pornographers.

I'm sad to see him go.

uh, (1)

sakura the mc (795726) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771304)

"He gave Bush a five-page, handwritten letter in which he stated, 'The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved."

please explain.

Re:uh, (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771344)

"Mission Accomplished"

Ashcroft (4, Interesting)

ZX81 (105194) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771306)

In all honesty I can only say good riddance.

It's almost unbelievable that the USA would allow him to work on bills such as the Patriot act.

What I don't understand is why are you guys not protesting?

Have you given up?

Re:Ashcroft (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771372)

Go ahead, protest the bill, but realize that it won't do any good. The senators/representatives didn't all read the bill. I'd be surprised if a majority read it.

No amount of protesting is going to make a lazy politician unlazy.

Re:Ashcroft (1)

ZX81 (105194) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771415)

:-)

So I take it that's a confirmation of giving up...

So sad guys. Why are you letting this happen? If they tried it in New Zealand, we'd have 30-40% of the population on the streets.

Maybe we are just a hardcore protesting nation, but I thought that instinct was built into every human.

Do you think there are particular events that have caused you to lose faith in the act of protesting?

Re:Ashcroft (3, Interesting)

Drilian (661329) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771424)

I think it's that Americans as a whole don't notice what's going on in their (our) government. It's a sad state of affairs, really.

But yeah, I'm glad he's gone, too. Maybe we can finally uncover the statue of Justice.

Will Bush appoint a more conservative replacement? (5, Interesting)

mind21_98 (18647) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771307)

Is it possible that Bush will appoint a more conservative replacement for Ashcroft? That's been the danger, especially since up to four Supreme Court positions may open up this term. How would a more conservative Attorney General affect the US?

Re:Will Bush appoint a more conservative replaceme (5, Funny)

darnok (650458) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771334)

I hear there's a former Iraqi Information Minister who's still looking for a job.

Re:Will Bush appoint a more conservative replaceme (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771338)

Whoa whoa whoa whoa...this is the PATRIOT ACT (TM) guy. Is a "more police-statist" candidate possible, short of ?

*more* conservative? (3, Funny)

Goonie (8651) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771360)

Are you trying to tell me that there are *more* "conservative" (they're really radicals) people Shrub could potentially appoint than Ashcroft? Just how scary do your wingnuts get?

In any case, I don't know whether you were intending to but you've alluded to an interesting point. Justice Ashcroft anyone?

Re:Will Bush appoint a more conservative replaceme (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771395)

Most liekly hes looking for an appointment to the SC. 3 or four are expected to come around in the next 4 years.

Re:Will Bush appoint a more conservative replaceme (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771398)

Ashcroft will be nominated to one of those Supreme Court positions next week.

Re:Will Bush appoint a more conservative replaceme (1)

Jeff DeMaagd (2015) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771432)

Ashcroft is pretty much a Christian Fundementalist, it is pretty hard to be more conservative than that, unless maybe Jerry Falwell gets appointed.

Re:Will Bush appoint a more conservative replaceme (1)

blackburnrovers (798608) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771444)

this has been a fear among civil libertarians lately. it seems an easy move for Bush to make. he has already proclaimed that the American public has given him a mandate. the hard part is where to look for a more conservative AG...I am sure the Bushie's are up to the task though.

Good riddance (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771308)

Hope he burns in hell.

Bush's Army (1, Insightful)

Lordofohio (703786) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771311)

Although I am afraid of the person that will replace Ashcroft, it is certainly a good thing for civil liberties and freedom that he is leaving. I think this brings to light the fact that Bush is only a part of the worry when it comes to the Bush administration, it is the goons behind him whispering in his ear that cause much of the worry.

Why Is This News? (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771312)

When A President is re-elected, turnover of people in the Administration is routine.

Why is John Ashcroft the subject of a front page story on slashdot? Don Evans also resigned, yet I see no mention of him here.

Oh yea, on slashdot Ashcroft is Hitler, is raping our women, and destroying our rights.

nobody wants to comment on this story (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771321)

as it may win you a long holiday in cuba.

And now Bush has his first Nominee (4, Insightful)

Marxist Hacker 42 (638312) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771322)

For the Supreme Court...

Re:And now Bush has his first Nominee (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771335)

Well, that cut *my* cheering short...

I have IN MY HAND (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771331)

a letter! A five page letter!
With names of KNOWN TERRORISTS
in the US Senate.
Due to the dangerous nature of this information I cannot disclose it until the end of my term. But I will need additional powers.

And, if you should ever notice a Senator missing - do not worry - it is for their safety. We will furnish a replacement as soon as possible. Please don't infer anything about their loyalty, or let this affect your voting!

Much ado about nothing (1)

dbavirt (543160) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771336)

I pulled this [209.157.64.200] from one of the first google links I found.

"...customary practice is for the entire cabinet to resign at the end of the term and the POTUS then reappoints those who he wants to stay on."

Goodbye... (1)

John Seminal (698722) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771343)

Glad to see him go. He is probably one of the most dangerous people to American civil liberties. Lets not forget this is the guy who takes Americans and holds them without legal help. And lets not forget this is the guy who lost his senate seat to a dead man. If Missourians elected a dead man over him, what does that say about the president appointing him? Gesh... dumb republicans.

Good, but.... (1)

Elizabeth007 (829402) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771347)

Glad to see him gone, but what worries me is who are they going to get to replace him? I seriously doubt it is going to be someone better than him (and, at this point, I do belive Atila the Hun would be better).

Shit's perfect, mission accomplished (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771348)

cheney is real, he don't give a fuck

Horray! Now he'll be free for his true passion... (5, Funny)

Disperz (818430) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771357)

I for one can't wait for his music career to jump off!
"LET THE EAGLE SOAR, LIKE SHE'S NEVER SOARN BEFORE!"
http://www.cnn.com/video/us/2002/02/25/a shcroft.si ngs.wbtv.med.html

Re:Horray! Now he'll be free for his true passion. (1)

themoodykid (261964) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771437)

There's really nothing like a soarn eagle. It's breathtaking. I suggest you try it.

Ashcroft wasn't so bad (2, Insightful)

mveloso (325617) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771358)

You know, when you look back Ashcroft wasn't so bad. He turned the FBI around and changed its mission radically. While the FBI has had a lot of false positives, it hasn't had many false negatives.

Compare that to the last AG, Janet Reno. The only thing I remember her doing was frying a whole bunch of fellow citizens down in Texas...and refusiing to prosecute/investigate a bunch of Clintonistas.

Re:Ashcroft wasn't so bad (5, Insightful)

John Seminal (698722) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771436)

You know, when you look back Ashcroft wasn't so bad. He turned the FBI around and changed its mission radically.

Yeah, he did change the FBI. They no longer need search warrents, and they have no respect of our civil liberties. If you ask me, he damaged the USA. We were a more free people before he came to power. And don't forget, Ashcroft was the guy who lost his senate seat because the people of his state elected a dead guy rather than have 6 more years of him.

While many here dislike him... (0, Redundant)

the-build-chicken (644253) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771362)

While many here dislike him, others have more favorable opinions of him

In other news, while many disapprove of the war in iraq, some do not...while many people enjoy eating meat, others do not, while many people are cat people, others are not and while many parts of a sentence are not redundant, others, in fact, are.

So, Mission Accomplished eh? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771366)

Seems I saw that somewhere else as well....

Poor Mr. Ashcroft (3, Funny)

agent dero (680753) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771367)

"He gave Bush a five-page, handwritten letter in which he stated"

I have a new found respect for John Ashcroft, it's pretty respectable that he thinks Bush will read five-pages of his letter.

At least he "still believes"

;)

Self-fulfilling prophecy (5, Funny)

jinxidoru (743428) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771368)

'The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.'

Am I correct in assuming that his resignation is what is bringing this achievement to pass?

I'm not one who would tear his hair out (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771377)

...over Ashcroft, but he did remind me of the type of person who was mortally afraid that someone, somewhere was having a good time, and was determined to put a stop too it.

As well as secure us from sex, drugs and P2P (5, Interesting)

isolation (15058) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771378)

Thank God. I wish Ashcroft could read this.

I am a Christain and a Conservative and I am glad to see him gone. His record on states rights vs federal law proves that the current administration cares nothing about the will of the people and only about the power of Federal law. I dont want the state coming in and telling me what I can and can't put in to my body or who I can have sex with. I could just see this guy dragging homosexuals in if the amendment had passed. I dont want the state to come in to my marrage or a gay marrage anymore than I want the state to come in to my relationship with God.

This guy got his rocks off dragging people in to court over matters that should never have been law in the first place.

See you around John.....

two thoughts spring to mind (4, Funny)

way2trivial (601132) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771385)

the humor, 1- "He gave Bush a five-page, handwritten letter in which he stated, 'The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.'" the fact that it was addressed to the receipient it was- makes this an oxymoron...

the serious 2- I recall a quote attributed to the then director of the patent office, requesting the patent office be closed, as all concieveable inventions had been made.. both the quote and the historical snip I give seem to have a spooky similarity

karma be damned (0, Flamebait)

IshanCaspian (625325) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771393)

FUCK YOU ASHCROFT! GET THE FUCK OUTTA THERE, YOU NAZI PIG FUCKER!

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

(lameness filter encountered. post aborted! reason: don't uses so many caps, it's like yelling)

Ashcroft according to John McCutcheon (1)

macguys (472025) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771402)

For a lyrical look at Attorney General Ashcroft, check out folksinger John McCutcheon's free MP3 of his song, Ashcroft's Army. You can find it by clicking here [folkmusic.com].

A good thing (5, Funny)

ravenspear (756059) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771409)

The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.

Does that mean the Patriot Act can be repealed now?

Damn Dude! Why Does Tokken Live Here? (1)

Uosdwis (553687) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771416)

Although I am scared about the prospects of his replacement being a bigger freak, I do not recognize many of the names being speculated upon. But I like how many of their top qualities are being reported:

Larry Thompson .. An African-American and a strong conservative, Thompson could appeal to several constituencies.
White House general counsel Alberto Gonzales, a Hispanic

'cause these are really important qualifiers

Ding-Dong! (-1, Troll)

poofyhairguy82 (635386) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771418)

The Witch is dead. Which old Witch? That prude ass bitch!


Ding Dong! The Wicked Witch is dead.


Wake up - sleepy head, rub your eyes, get out of bed.


Wake up, the Wicked Witch is dead. He's gone where the goblins go,


Below - below - below. Yo-ho, let's open up and sing and ring the bells out.


Ding Dong' the merry-oh, sing it high, sing it low.


Let them know

We're saved! (5, Insightful)

mcmonkey (96054) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771420)

'The objective of securing the safety of Americans from crime and terror has been achieved.'

So they figured out how anthrax from US Army labs was mailed to various members of congress and media outlets, and captured those responsible?

Oh...they haven't done that, eh?

Well, at least gays can't marry.

5 pages?! thats way to long for Bush to read (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771422)

Theres no way bush is going to read all 5 pages its just to much work and as he says "its a hard job" or he might be on vacation

That's great but . . . (1)

uberjoe (726765) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771423)

They want to replace him with Zell Miller. We can now look forward to the day when all matters legal will be settled with duel at sunrise.

great (4, Funny)

nizo (81281) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771431)

I knew I should have hurried up with my idea for a four horsemen of the apocolypse t-shirt, now one of the horsemen has resigned....

Enter Giuliani (0, Flamebait)

Doc Ruby (173196) | more than 9 years ago | (#10771434)

The only question now is whether Giuliani will take the job as Bush Enforcer, or wait to be installed as a Supreme Court Justice. He'll probably go for Enforcer, because he's used to running a "Chief Prosecutor for Emperor" race, setting him up comfortably for 2008. Unless Sir Giuliani [tribuneindia.com] runs afoul of the Constitution [findlaw.com]:

Article I, Section 9, Clause 8:
" No Title of Nobility shall be granted by the United States: And no Person holding any Office of Profit or Trust under them, shall, without the Consent of the Congress, accept of any present, Emolument, Office, or Title, of any kind whatever, from any King, Prince or foreign State."

Hmm (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10771452)

So who else can we force to quit, and get someone better?
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