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Hacking Vodka

michael posted more than 9 years ago | from the everclear dept.

It's funny.  Laugh. 570

enrico_suave writes "A group of geeks aimed to find out whether running cheap vodka through a brita water filter would make it drinkable. They claim after several passes through the filter the cheap vodka surpassed the premium Ketel One in drinkability tests. I think they should have done the test 'double blind' although drinking Vladmir Vodka probably could make you go blind anyways... =)"

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Common knowledge? (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872542)

I believe this has actually been known for a long time.

Here is the canonical list of the top ten things that taste better once filtered through a Brita pitcher six times, in decreasing order of improvement, according to the Brita FAQ [brita.com]:

  • Orange juice
  • Coca Cola
  • Vodka
  • Cooking oil
  • Urine
  • Gasoline
  • Blood
  • Vinegar
  • Water
  • Semen
Surprisingly, pus did not make the list....

Re:Common knowledge? (2, Informative)

BlakeLupa (767754) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872649)

I do belive drinking gasoline will still give you stomach cancer not matter how may times you run it through a filter. Just incase anyoen was thinking of trying it.

GNAA Launches Attack on Slashdot Parent Company (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872546)

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gnaa for life niggas (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872547)


not surprising... (4, Insightful)

kormoc (122955) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872548)

not surprising considering that vodka is alcohol and water, and the better tasting the water, the better the vodka is, so ya, cleaning out some the impuritys from the water would make it taste better.

Re:not surprising... (3, Funny)

Tyndmyr (811713) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872565)

Not to mention, killing some of the impurities'll probably help with the hangover. As for myself, Ive progressed to the point where I can occasionally afford vodka from a glass bottle.

Re:not surprising... (3, Informative)

afidel (530433) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872733)

For a vodkaphile on a budget nothing beats pearl vodka [pearlvodka.com], it's smoother than Grey Goose and costs only ~$20/750ml. Hell I'm not on a budget anymore but I still see no reason to waste $30 per bottle =) Itgoest through A "five-time distillation and six-time filtration process" which makes it exceptionally smooth.

Re:not surprising... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872645)

not surprising considering that vodka is alcohol and water, and the better tasting the water, the better the vodka is, so ya, cleaning out some the impuritys from the water would make it taste better.

What about cheaper spirts that contain formaldehyde?

no no no (2, Funny)

nocomment (239368) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872549)

drinking Vladmir Vodka probably could make you go blind

That's Ffud that made all those hillbillies go blind.

Re:no no no (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872579)

No, the hillbillies went blind from FUDD.

Re:no no no (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872712)

Stop it!

Thats quite enough FUD for one thread.

Re:no no no (4, Informative)

cshark (673578) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872702)

Na' Vodka's kids stuff. If you are really serious about drinking yourself blind, get yourself a nice bottle of ARAK, and drink it in one sitting. A good bottle will be up to and around 70-80% alcohol. It's big in the middle east. They drink it on the weekends, the rest of the time... it's Window cleaner.

no no no again... (1)

BrokenHalo (565198) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872768)

If you really want to go blind (it's up to you) forget about ethanol and try methanol. Just make sure you've got a white stick handy.

Better than a Volcano (5, Funny)

glowimperial (705397) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872555)

Finally a great science project that the kids can do at home.

Re:Better than a Volcano (5, Funny)

pHatidic (163975) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872624)

Last year some kids I know 'liberated' a distillation column from the chem labs and took some normal vodka and distilled it into 190 proof "super-vodka". A couple shots of that and I was hallucinating and kept running out of my dorm room every half hour because for some reason I thought my bike was being stolen. I still get that warm tingly feeling in my liver just thinking about it.

Re:Better than a Volcano (4, Funny)

caveat (26803) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872764)

Hells bells, if they were ransacking the chem labs, they should have just taken some anhydrous ethanol. Back when I was in school, we used to order it by the 5-gallon tub ($20.99!), and since it was USP-grade, it was technically safe to drink...nobody ever noticed a liter gone here or there.

Of course, since alcohol doesn't really want to exist in that 100% pure state, it had a nasty habit of dehydrating your tender tissues on the way down, as well as having the unholiest burn of any drink I've ever had (it actually had sort of an oily texture/mouth feel, instead of the usual watery sensation), but oh man did it ever fux0r one up. Cheers!

I don't drink (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872556)

I don't drink

Fantastic! (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872561)

Great. Looks like someone's nine years of freshman chemistry hasn't been a complete waste.

Hey, I often run Vodka through a filtration system (5, Funny)

physicsphairy (720718) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872563)

But it sure doesn't make it taste any better.

Re:Hey, I often run Vodka through a filtration sys (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872671)

Well so do I, and it does so! Give me your vodka, and you can judge.

In Soviet Russia... (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872566)

Vladimir filters YOU!

Vodka testing? (3, Funny)

TWX (665546) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872567)

Sounds like a science experiment that I could actually participate in.

I wonder why they never featured this one on Bill Nye The Science Guy or on Beakman's World. I don't think that Lester, the self-proclaimed, "Man in a Rat Suit" would have been much different, even if he were the hands-on evaluator...

Obligatory Bad Joke (4, Funny)

Zephiris (788562) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872571)

In Soviet Russia, Vodka filters you!

Re:Obligatory Bad Joke (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872606)

WTF? FUNNY? geez. Im getting so fucking fedup with soviet russia jokes...

Re:Obligatory Bad Joke (1)

DrMrLordX (559371) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872637)

It was funny, but sadly, an AC told the joke a few seconds before the grandparent. The AC, predictably, did not get modded up.

Re:Obligatory Bad Joke (5, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872700)

Actually, that, unlike most comments related to Soviet Russia, is actually pretty poignant. There was enough vodka per capita in the USSR that the drinker could be considered an impurity in the drink.

Gray Kangaroo (3, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872576)

Hmm.. this sounds quite a bit like the Gray Kangaroo [graykangaroo.com] filtration system that you can buy on the internet.

They want $41 for it, which is too expensive for me. But in my undergraduate days, I would definitely have considered it. Though you can probably use a Brita filter like these folks have and save a few bucks.

Some calculations... (4, Funny)

bergeron76 (176351) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872582)

Let's see:
Cheap vodka: $10 (US assumptions)
Name brand filter: $30
Total vodka purity: $40
As compared to: Good vodka - $34.99

Hrmm, I guess it probably made sense when they did the experiment.

Seriously though, it's neat to see hacks like this. It should also be noted that the chick in the middle of this picture [dca.net] is kinda cute. But does anyone know what the pills are in the bottom left corner of that picture?

Re:Some calculations... (5, Funny)

FunOne (45947) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872588)

It should also be noted that the chick in the middle of this picture is kinda cute.

How much vodka have you had tonight?

Re:Some calculations... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872761)

See that "shot-glass" in the lower right?

Re:Some calculations... (1, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872589)

I hope you know that's a man in the middle of that picture.

Also, those pills are no fun. Lithium (for bipolar disorder.)

Re:Some calculations... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872707)

That's no man! She's my MOTHER!

Re:Some calculations... (1)

thatnerdguy (551590) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872591)

Are you sure that's a chick?

It's either a manly looking woman or girly looking guy. Either way, not my cup of tea.

Re:Some calculations... (4, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872600)

How do you get $30 for one filter?

A three pack of filters is around $17 [amazon.com].

Heck, the pitchers themselves are only around $10....

Seems like a good deal to me, especially if you could use the filter more than once (likely two times at least, if you only filter four passes, possibly three times or more).

Re:Some calculations... (1)

MediumFormat (771662) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872603)

Speaking of vodka making you go blind.... are you sure that's a chick in the middle there? If only it were so easy to filter bad politicians that way.

Re:Some calculations... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872604)

Thats a chick?

Re:Some calculations... (1)

Rev Saxon (666154) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872608)

"..It should also be noted that the chick in the middle of this picture is kinda cute..."

Im pretty sure that its a guy....

Re:Some calculations... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872613)

That isn't a chick in the middle of that picture. Perhaps you now have some explaining to do.

Re:Some calculations... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872620)

You better be joking, cause that's a guy, and an ugly one at that.

Re:Some calculations... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872635)

Ted? Is that you?

Re:Some calculations... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872660)

Wtf that last thing about the picture better have been a joke. Or did you forget what a girl looks like.

Damn ./ ruining people's minds.

Re:Some calculations... (1)

Piranhaa (672441) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872683)

Seriously though, it's neat to see hacks like this. It should also be noted that the chick in the middle of this picture [dca.net] is kinda cute. But does anyone know what the pills are in the bottom left corner of that picture? Well common now, what kind of question is that. The guy in the middle is a hippy, they're partying (kind of... maybe in their own ways), and they're nerds... Needs I say more?

Re:Some calculations... (1)

Rinikusu (28164) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872685)

Good vodka, $35? Good god, man, what are you drinking??

I've found that Monopolowa ($15/liter, sometimes cheaper) is a SUPERB potato vodka. Great, clean taste, and I've never had a hangover drinking a fifth or even a liter of it at a time. Ever. Sometimes price is NOT a determining factor in quality, and I think this is one of those times. Grey Goose and the others are "okay", but none of them come even close to the price/quality of that fine Austrian Monopolowa. Too bad they changed the label from the generic looking one to one with more...class?

Some [Long Term] calculations... (3, Informative)

Mulletproof (513805) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872689)

Let's see... It still makes sense when you consider you can use the same filter several times. Most are rated in the gallons filtered before they need a change* whereas your "good" vodka is going to start adding up pretty quickly on a bottle to bottle basis. After the initial expense, I'm saving $20 to every bottle you buy.

*A brita pitcher filter can filter 40 gallons before changing

Re:Some calculations... (1)

Lord Apolon (805331) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872697)

1) The filter can be re-used many a time. So it's cheaper in the long run. 2) That's a girl?! *faints* SOMEONE forgot to run their vodka through the filter...

Re:Some calculations... (1)

nebenfun (530284) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872708)

wait a sec...
that's a chick!?!?

I'd better run out and get a Brita filter. Obviously, my current vodka isn't cutting it......

Re:Some calculations... (5, Funny)

cacepi (100373) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872714)

It should also be noted that the chick in the middle of is kinda cute. [dca.net]

She is. I know the first thing I look for in a girl is a 5-'O-clock shadow.

That's a dude, dude.

Re:Some calculations... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872718)

Chick? I thought that was just an ugly dude!

Re:Some calculations... (3, Funny)

spectasaurus (415658) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872729)

I'm pretty sure the pills are estrogen. Or testosterone. Either way, I'm pretty sure they're for your sweety in the middle.

beer too? (3, Funny)

chocolatetrumpet (73058) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872583)

What else can be improved using the brita? Beer maybe? Soup even?

I am so curious now :-)

Anyone else want to do trials and report the results? My mom would probably get upset.

Re:beer too? (4, Funny)

Just Some Guy (3352) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872622)

Anyone else want to do trials and report the results?

I poured in a Fat Tire and got a Bud Light. The second pass end up like a Corona, and I didn't have the heart to subject it to a third run.

Re:beer too? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872633)

The morning after a strenuous party at my college, I found in the courtyard a discarded Brita pitcher and a gatorade bottle full of a brownish mix of, apparently, coffee, beer and discarded cigarettes.

What would you have done?

Anyway, the filter was absolutely ruined after running about 10 oz. of the sludge, but it came through almost clear, with only a tinge of brown. Impressive.

Re:Soup? (1)

rubberbando (784342) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872658)

Soup even?

Uh...maybe if the soup is just a broth type soup, otherwise it will become a broth type soup on the 1st pass... :-P

Not much of a test (4, Funny)

Genevish (93570) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872593)

The question is, did they taste it after each pass through the filter? That would explain the result... ("Thish is farckn great!!")

Not much of a test at all (1)

chocolatetrumpet (73058) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872670)

The question is, did they taste it after each pass through the filter?

Actually, yes, that's exactly what they did. RTFA.

Try the premium Pur brand (4, Interesting)

pgpckt (312866) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872594)

They should try it with the premium Brita Pur filters, not just the regular Brtia kind. Those are supposed to get out even more bad stuff, and perhaps in less passes? Maybe a three way test: Brita v. Regular Pur v. Super Pur.


Re:Try the premium Pur brand (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872740)

What are you talking about? Brita and Pur are competeting companies, why did you call it BRITA PUR FILTERS?

stop it. (-1, Troll)

thhamm (764787) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872607)

darn. why is the top article on /. - *RIGHT NOW* - about [insert some alcoholic beverage you like] :???:

what did i do? did i offend you in some way? why are you doing this to me? blarblkbjkb. did i misspell something? misspell perhaps?! ...

Caammaan (1)

neoform (551705) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872610)

Like they don't filter their vodka for impurities.. well, unless they add impurities to give it character or something.

Double Blind Study (5, Funny)

serutan (259622) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872626)

If you really want a double blind study mix Vladimir and Pepe Lopez Gold tequila.

Hooch+Brita = Water (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872631)

I've done something similar with very different results.

Once, me and a friend of mine decided it would be interesting to make a still. To make a potentially long story short, we produced a number of test batches from a sizeable amount of Corona.

Let me go on to say that nothing that tastes good has EVER come out of our still. So, in an attept to do some "activated carbon filtering", just like we read on the vodka bottles, we ran some through the Brita filter.

And got water.

Re:Hooch+Brita = Water (1)

thhamm (764787) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872655)

>sizeable amount of Corona
>... we ran some through the Brita filter.

>And got water.

life is full of miracles. :)

Re:Hooch+Brita = Water (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872738)

If this had been recorded, had you rewound the tape, you'd think Brita was some sort of gravity-defying Jesus.

Does this work for Rubbing Alcohol? (4, Funny)

dantheman82 (765429) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872644)

I tried this five times with rubbing alcohol? How many times before I can get it at vodka level of drinkability?

Re:Does this work for Rubbing Alcohol? (3, Funny)

miskatonic alumnus (668722) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872664)

I don't know; but, methanol seems to taste better after processing with one of those filters. I ... hey, waitaminute ... someone's been fiddling with the brightness on my monitor. Who turned out the lights???

Re:Does this work for Rubbing Alcohol? (1)

dukeisgod (739214) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872699)

That's one hell of a filter if it will make Ethanol out of Methanol. I'd say never. You wouldn't want to poison yourself.

Re:Does this work for Rubbing Alcohol? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872720)

Actually "rubbing alcohol" isn't methanol; it's isopropyl alcohol: H3C-CH(OH)-CH3. Methanol is CH3OH. But, you're right--no filter can turn either of those into ethanol, C2H5OH.

Re:Does this work for Rubbing Alcohol? (2, Informative)

Just Some Guy (3352) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872717)

About as many times as it takes to split all of the methanol parts into H-OH + HCH and for them to magically and completely recombine into ethanol and some excess water. Up until that point, it will kill you. Good luck!

Hydrochloric Acid (1)

Piranhaa (672441) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872648)

I once heard a guy run HCL(aq) through the filter then drank it... I don't know if he survived though :/

Re:Hydrochloric Acid (1)

Just Some Guy (3352) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872701)

If it didn't kill him outright, then it probably wouldn't have any ill effect at all. Considering that HCL is the primary content of your stomach, I'd say that the odds of a small amount of it diluted past the point that it would burn your esophagus should be completely harmless. Note that IANA gastroenterologist, so if you try it and die painfully I assume no blame. :)

Vodka taste (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872666)

Ive always wondered what makes some vodkas better than others. is it really true that the more pure the drink the better it tastes?

if thats true then surely the best would be lab ethanol mixed with distilled water?

Coke vs. Pepsi (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872681)

Maybe Coke works fine but in college we tried pepsi and it just sat in the top for over a day before we poured it out. Almost none went through.
Makes me think twice whenever I'm offered pepsi now.

I object! (3, Funny)

gooman (709147) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872703)

You kids and your high technology.
Why back in my day we used our kidneys and liver to filter our alcohol and we liked it!

In case of Slashdotting, mod up (article text) (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872743)

Well the staff here at OMGIB are thrilled with the swell of traffic that this experiment has generated. We're working on more half assed applications of second rate science for the practical slacker as we speak.

Several questions have popped up on a regular basis in the comment thread, so I'll try to knock them out here one by one:

Um, why didn't you guys do the test double-blind?
Scienticians often are forced to take short-cuts to make giant king sized leaps of advancement in the field of boozahology. You'll also notice that the crackers weren't sterile, the glasses were barely clean, and there was a conspicuous lack of any saftey gear. Sometimes, you just have to stare down the barrel of progress and hope there's not one sitting in the chamber.

Isn't it possible that you just ended up drunk and only thought it tasted better
Our taste tests were only about a quarter of a shot each. It took about 20 minutes to complete an entire filtration cycle and we we had some food during the test. I know I only had about 2 shots worth of vodka during the experiment.

Did you try and use the filter for water after the vodka experiment?
The last thing I need in life is to catch a buzz off my morning coffee. Replacement filters are rather cheap as someone in the comment thread mentioned, but I'm sure that a few pitchers of water would take any vodka soaked into the filter out.

I think you forgot to prime your brita filter with water before you used it.
Actually, we did. It was soaked and a few pitchers of water were run through according to the directions on the package. It was in our notes, but we wrote everything up from the notes at the bar.

Why didn't you . . .
Well although we plan on revisiting this experiment, we're on to make other breakthroughs of loose cannon science. We encourage all of the aspiring scienticians reading this to try this for themselves and email us your results. Send them over to ohmygoditburns@gmail.com and share your findings.
Comments Off
Practical Applications of the Philosopher's stone. For drunks.
Filed under:

* Science

-- adam @ 5:08 pm

In the alchemical tradition, creation of the Philosopher's stone is the ultimate end to man's needs. The stone has the power to cure disease, prolong life, and possesses the added benefit of being able to transmute metals, as in lead into gold.
As scienticians, we believe that such an object exists, and that it can be used for our own dastardly purposes.
Our theory is that a simple brita water filter can be used to make bad vodka, into good. In our case this meant turning a Vladimir(TM), into a Ketel One(TM). At $11.09 for 1.75 liter (Ketel is 11.99 for the 350 ml), Vladimir is a steal. It is, however, painful to drink, has a repugnant aftertaste, posesses a bouquet reminiscent of rubbing alcohol. Our working theory was that these terrible qualities were caused by a lack of proper filtration, and that running our Vlad through a charcoal filter would remove some of the impurities causing these odors and flavors.


1. Bottle of cheap and/or nasty vodka. The cheapest price per volume was selected from the liquor store. In our case, this turned out to be "Vladimir Vodka(TM)".


2. Bottle of control (control, ahh fancy scientician word) vodka. A bottle of Ketel One(TM) was grabbed at the last second while on the checkout line.
3. Science Crackers! These were essential in cleansing our palates between tastings. NOT to be overlooked! For this, we used your easily obtainable standard (err, premium) science crackers.

4. One standard Brita filter. I believe this cost roughly $15 at the supermarket. It probably should be used after the experiment to filter water.
Science Brita
5. Shot glasses. The shot glasses should be of different type, so as to be more easily able to distinguish between the filtered, and the control vodka.
6. Someone semi-sober to take notes. Thanks Dawn.


7. One "Science funnel", to pour the filtered vodka back into its bottle.

science funnel

8. Coffee Grounds. It is a not so well known fact that coffee grounds will clear your nose of a scent. We used them to clear our noses to compare the smells of the filtered to the control vodka.
9. Science pole! (we couldn't find a pole, so we used a broom) ("Are you insane, Frink? Put down that science pole!")

The Method for this experiment was very simple, and enjoyable, except for the waiting parts.
We would simply pour the entire bottle of vodka through the filter, wait for it to drip through, and then funnel it back into the bottle for easy pouring. We then poured off small amounts into the shot glasses for tasting. Additionally, we had shot glasses full of the control vodka for comparison. Each scienticion would taste and smell the filtered vodka. They then ate a "science cracker" and sniffed some coffee, and then taste/smell the Ketel One. The recording scientician wrote down their reactions, and the entire process was repeated. Also recorded was the start and end time of the filtering process. We noted a loss of vodka through spillage (for my science homies).

Our results were taken by our 'reporting scientician" who diligently recorded all of our filtration times, and taste comments.

8:43 - we take out first sip.
Fletcher notes that "The world hates him".
Ken comments on both the cheapness, and the nastyness of the Vladimir.
I was apparently only able to say, "oh god", and "vile".

8:45 - The first filtration begins
(note, we had a misfire as the filter was not seated properly, so...

8:46 - The first filtration begins again.
Ken notes that the brita box tells us that the brita will reduce various elements which can cause
"long term liver or kidney damage". Hooray, we all think.

8:54 - We notice that 1.75 liters takes a really long time to filter.
I noticed that the vodka 'looked' better. Yay for Subjective Opinions.

9:00 - I comment on the fact that it's STILL GOING.

9:03 - First filtration finished. Second tasting.
Ken notes that we've spilled some on the carpet (for my homies)
Fletcher notices little bubbles, which we later decide are probably due to pouring the vodka back into the bottle, through the funnel.
Fletcher - "I don't think it's AS bad." and "I was full well prepared to cry, and I didn't, but it still hurts."
Adam - "Less offensive."
Ken - "Smoother."
All - Still has a bad aftertaste.

9:06 2nd filtering begins
At this point, the vodka appears to be filtering faster.

9:19 - 2nd filtering ends
A decrease in the horrid smell is clear.
Ken - "My god, that is smooth"
Fletcher - "Not bad at all"
Adam - "Much better than it originally was"
We also noticed that at this point, the Ketel One has a stronger odor.
Ken also decided at this point that he preferred the filtered Vlad to the control vodka.

9:30 - 3rd filtering begins


9:44 - End of 3rd filter cycle.
At this point the Vladimir has pretty much the same odor that it did before.
Adam - "Even better, less noxious aftertaste."
Fletcher - "Less aftertaste" and "Chill it, and you could probably fool most people."
Ken - "At this time, I prefer this over Ketel One."

9:50 - 4th filtration begins.
(Our humble scienticians at this point go to the store for snacks. Filtering Vodka is hungry work.)

10:04 - 4th filtration done.
Possibly even less scent.
Adam - "Only slightly better, but still improved."
Fletcher agrees.
Ken - "Tessa (my cat) licked the glass, and didn't die."
The scienticians agreed that after 4 filtrations, the Vladimir was smoother than Ketel one.

10:18 - 5th filtration begins
In order to remind myself, and possibly for self flagellation purposes, I tried the baseline Vladimir again. I gagged. Fun.
We decided that perhaps we shouldn't have been quite so conservative with our tasting portions. I mean, what fun is that?

10:31 5th filtration done
Adam - "Very little smell" and "wow it's good now, absolutely no aftertaste."
Ken - "Enjoyable."
Fletcher - "Almost no flavor now."


10:35 - 6th filtration begins
Fletcher spills his shot of control vodka. Tsk tsk.

10:49 - 6th filtration done
At this point it was clear that there were no vast improvements over the last 2 filtrations.
Adam - "Stability achieved"
Ken "We're there. Either we've burnt out the filter, or reached the point of equilibrium"

We decided that we should try this filtration chilled, so I broke out my trusty shaker and some ice.
Shake-a shake, and pour.
Comments on chilled:
Ken - "Wow" and "goes down like water."
Fletcher - "Quite Comfortable."
and I gave it a boring "Good."

Herein we have our staff and contributing scienticians submit their results.

I had previously heard of a company on the internet which makes a filter for liquor, so it was with that in mind that I came up with this experiment. I believed that the filter would hold back some of the more noxious chemicals in the vodka, which lead to the bad taste (and possibly hangovers). The basis for this belief was my own experience with activated charcoal tablets. Taking these while drinking can definately lessen the chance of a wicked hangover. It seems that the charcoal binds with some chemicals which contribute to them, so why not the charcoal in a brita filter. (Note: I did not experience a hangover after this experiment, but our samples were pitiably small) Our initial estimate was based on some internet research, put the number of filtrations at 10 before a great improvement was noted. Seeing one by the 4th filtration was a surprise. Seeing no change after that presents a quandry. Did we reach a point at which the filtration had done all it could, or had we destroyed our brita filter. Further testing with the same filter, and some more Vladimir should answer this.
I found the spirits produced to have no offensive taste, nor odor, and I will be using this method in the future to create a source of cheap neutral spirits for my liquor making experiments. The leftovers from this experiment were used to create a horseradish infused vodka, which was declared "yummy" by most who tasted it. The neutral spirits allowed the full flavor of the horseradish to come through, without being adulterated by rubbing alcohol smell/taste, or the wicked aftertaste we noticed when first trying our Vladimir sample.
I hope to experiment with other types of liquor in the future, especially after determining the lifetime of a brita filter used in this manner. A decision was made that using pvc pipe,and lining up 3 brita filters cartridges inside through which the vodka would flow serially, you could reach the optimum filtration in the shortest amount of time. The most amazing thing about this is that our crackpot idea actually worked, and could be a money saving way to enjoy some premium tasting vodka.
Adam - Staff Scientician, OMGIB

Coming into this experiment, I had some doubts as to the methodology as well as the subjective manner in which the results would be judged, not to mention a health distrust for anyone who would voluntarily drink Vladimir vodka warm and straight.
Amazingly, though, after the 4th filtration, I came to a startling conclusion: The Filtered vodka tasted better than the control fluid (Ketel One). It was smoother, and had a very delicate aftertaste. Of course, people may claim that it is the aftertaste that is what really gives vodka its flavor, but if you're drinking Vladimir, I certainly hope you weren't drinking it for taste!
Now, filtering works. As fantastic and far-fetched as it seems, what you have after you've passed Vladimir through the Brita sufficiently is a fluid worthy of enjoying straight. In fact, some conjectured that it could be passed off as higher quality vodka, if you're the sort of person who keeps empty Gray Goose bottle lying around. However, that experiment will have to wait until we get a grant to purchase more Control materials.
-Kenneth, contributing scientician

I was shocked. I'd expected the vodka to taste marginally better, but did not expect the great results we came up with that evening. Further tests need to be performed on other spirits, but preliminary findings should be sufficient to run a college student or two to the emergency room. That's a joke kids, don't drink more than you can handle and always stop when your cousin Marge starts looking attractive.
The filtered result was smooth and bore almost no aftertaste. For those of you who like the unique flavor of a Kettle One, Grey Goose, or other top shelf vodka, this is not a perfect substitute. However, this would be the perfect mixer vodka in my opinion. Try a blind taste test with your drunkard guests next time you throw a party and send us your results.
-Chris, Staff Scientician

Brita as placebo? (1)

weighn (578357) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872744)

there must be a placebo effect at work here.
anyone know how I can cram crappy eccies thru one of those things?

Hey (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872745)

I'd need to get drunk to hang out with those ugly fucks.

The SloshDot vodka-tasthing proshedure (3, Funny)

davidwr (791652) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872759)

Drink glass of expensive vokda. Good stuff!
Drink 1st glasss of cheap vodka. Yuck ptooey!
Filter 2nd glass of crap. Almost tolera*hic*tolerable.
Filter 3rd glass of crap. Filter it again. Barely tolerablable.
Filther 4th glass of the stuff. Filther it again and spill some. Get help to filther it a 3rd time. Drink it. Could be better but gimme some more.
Ask friend to filter next glass a few times and give it back to me. I don't know how many time, just do it. Hey, not bad.
Hand glassh to fr*hic*friend and say do it again. This time more fhilther. Fhilther make junk tathe good. *hic*.
Get glass from friend. Hey, this is great!
Pass out.
Wake up the next day and post on Sloshdot.

I learned something today (1)

dupper (470576) | more than 9 years ago | (#10872773)

Everyday objects become approximately 5 to 7x funnier when qualified as lab tools. Now please excuse me while I go calibrate the ol' science pole.

i'm sick of this (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#10872778)

i'm sick and tired of seeing things on this website (drug, alcohol references)... things that are of the crowd of people who ridiculed those of us when we were much younger, those of us who view this website . How dare we allow this into our domain.
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