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Space Station Crew Forced to Cut Calories

CowboyNeal posted more than 9 years ago | from the mother-hubbard-named-new-chef dept.

Space 434

gollum123 writes "CNN and others are reporting that food is running so low aboard the international space station that both the crew members have been asked to cut their calories, at least until a Russian supply ship arrives in a little over two weeks. The situation is so bad that if a Russian cargo vessel scheduled to arrive on Dec. 25 has a mishap or is significantly delayed, the astronauts, one American and one Russian, will have to abandon the station and return home months ahead of schedule. An independent team is looking into how the food inventory ended up being tracked so poorly and how it can be improved in the future."

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I'm so fucking first (1)

Ads are broken (718513) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049895)

told ya

Great (1)

dosun88888 (265953) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049896)

I think that would scare the hell out of me.

~D

Re:Great (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049917)

I'm worried about the astronauts losing so much weight.

With the weight lost, it will change the trajectory of their orbit. Will it change it enough to be a substantial worry? We don't know this yet. Less weight and less gravity means they will be more likely to be thrown further away from earth

Re:Great (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049940)

Less weight and less gravity means they will be more likely to be thrown further away from earth.


Is this true? While less weight on the Spacestation means that it would create less gravity, wouldn't this be offset by the reduction in force created as it moved with the less weight?

Re:Great (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049952)

lol what?

Re:Great (0, Flamebait)

krymsin01 (700838) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049960)

Dumbass, just reverse the polarity.

Re:Great (1, Insightful)

Mr_Dyqik (156524) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049961)

Orbits of small mases about large masses are only determined by the mass of the central body.

That's a fundamental result of Einstein's strong equivalence principle.

The mass can affect the orbit if the orbit is low enough to interact with the atmosphere.

there is no measureable total weight loss (1, Offtopic)

dominux (731134) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050013)

there is a bit lost as heat, e=mc^2 and all that, but the humans are converting edible food, into non edible waste. The weight of the food+humans+waste is constant. Apart from that the weight of an orbiting object is pretty irrelevant unless it is very very big. (like a twin planet system)

Re:there is no measureable total weight loss (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050047)

there is a bit lost as heat, e=mc^2 and all that

I haven't done physics for a good many years now but I thought there was an equation depending on the different type of energy. e=mc^2 refers to nuclear energy (where c is the speed of light). Heat energy is e=mc(delta(T)) (where c is a constant specific to the objects transfering heat (?)). Kinetic energy is e=0.5*mv^2 etc.

Re:Great (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049995)

Why?

Space McDonalds? (3, Funny)

grazzy (56382) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049899)

.. where are they when you need them?

Starbucks? (1)

cybertears (778765) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049922)

What about the Starbucks they built on the moon I'm always hearing about?

Re:Starbucks? (1)

b0r0din (304712) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050062)

That was Dr. Evil's lair. You know, with the big 'laser'? Just because they own Starbucks doesn't mean they serve coffee on it. Although they should.

Throw me a frickin bone here, people.

Re:Space McDonalds? (1)

Blender (178901) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049925)

You mean the Restaurant at the End of the Universe I presume.

Sick joke... (-1, Flamebait)

WIAKywbfatw (307557) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049955)

Ah well, I've got karma to burn...

Q. What's the official drink of the Space Shuttle?

A. 7-Up.

That one was doing the rounds at school the day after Challenger went up.

Re:Sick joke... (1)

TehHustler (709893) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049976)

Told completely incorrectly. Q) Why does everyone at NASA drink Pepsi? A) Because they can't get 7-Up

Re:Sick joke... (2, Informative)

DNS-and-BIND (461968) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049989)

No...fricking moron.

Q: Why do they only drink Sprite at NASA?

A: Because they can't get 7-Up!

And the Challenger didn't go up, it went down. Fuck dude...get it straight. The Iraqi Information Minister's second cousin was more funny than you.

Re:Sick joke... (-1, Offtopic)

WIAKywbfatw (307557) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049991)

Duh. It blew up, didn't it?

Re:Sick joke... (1)

ForestGrump (644805) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050018)

i thought it imploded, not "blew up"

Re:Space McDonalds? (2, Funny)

CortoMaltese (828267) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050036)

And here I thought you could order pizza, delivered, anywhere. You know, free delivery if you order two or more pizzas.

"Hi, this is Leroy Chiao... I'd like to order two Quattro Stagiones, delivered, please... and put in some extra oregano, we're running low on that... International Space Station, in the orbit... yes, that's the one. Please hurry. Thanks, bye."

From Space Quest (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050063)

No, what they really need is a Space Bar.

Someone was smoking da weed... (1)

gibler (445031) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049903)

... and they got the munchies.

Eat poop (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049906)

They should each eat others faecies. Zombie Shit Eaters from Outer Space.

wait...wait..... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049910)

/me waits for:

In soviet russia food eats you

Weightless Weight Loss (1, Funny)

axonal (732578) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049912)

Wow, talk about strict dieting. Makes me wish I was up there, I know I could loose some of the weight gained from endless amounts of caffeinated drinks...

Re:Weightless Weight Loss (2, Insightful)

rock_climbing_guy (630276) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049923)

You could also lose that weight by stopping the caffeinated drinks and getting some excercise. As a side benefit, you might get some sunlight as well.

Re:Weightless Weight Loss (2, Funny)

krymsin01 (700838) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050012)

You could also have lots of sex... oh wait..

Re:Weightless Weight Loss (1)

cL0h (624108) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050046)

WTF?!??!?
Yeah I'd jump at the chance to go to space so I could stop drinking caffeinated drinks.
The weightlessness, seeing earth's curvature, new frontier stuff would be interesting too.
It's a pity one has to pass a physical to get that chance in the first place. Otherwise I'd be thin

Re:Weightless Weight Loss (2, Interesting)

ladybugfi (110420) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050067)

Their daily intake is 3000 calories, before the cut that is.

Wow! What on earth [sic!] are they doing up there? I'd think they would not require that much food since they don't have to deal with gravity.

Inquiring minds want to know...

Christmas (5, Funny)

pklong (323451) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049914)

"a Russian cargo vessel scheduled to arrive on Dec. 25". So they won't me missing out on the brussel sprouts this year. Poor sods :)

Re:Christmas (1)

flumps (240328) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050072)

.. well at least they could recycle the methane produced for their fuel cells eh?

In such a confined space it will probably be unbearable on boxing day morning until the filters kick in ;)

Simple explanation (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049916)

[...] looking into how the food inventory ended up being tracked so poorly [...]

Hey, even astronauts can get the munchies!

Most of the astronauts are American, right? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049920)

This is probably a good choice for them then.

Possible Culprits: (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049924)

Possible Culprits:
- Lab Mice (Think Pinky & the Brain)
- Unofficial parties to celebrate holidays (pass me more beer from back there will ya?)
- Aliens (Hmm... we need to analyse those things humans eat!) /me ducks before being kicked out!

Its those fat americans (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049926)


see its true

Only 2 astronauts (3, Insightful)

Nine Tenths of The W (829559) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049928)

Is the team usually this small or have most of them buggered off for Christmas?

they have already eaten the others (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049935)

posting anonymously due to grossness.

Fantastic (0, Offtopic)

Chuck Chunder (21021) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049943)

Mod that fucker up!

Re:they have already eaten the others (1)

kfg (145172) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049987)

Hey, why should rugby players have all the fun?

KFG

187 on an undercover astronaut (1)

Junichiro Koizumi (803690) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049930)

Space Takeout?? and From the Article (1)

hajihill (755023) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049932)

From the article:

"estimated there is enough food to last seven to 14 days beyond Christmas Day, after which there will be nothing left."

"they were put on restricted diets in hopes of trimming 5 percent to 10 percent of their daily intake of 3,000 calories."

"NASA and the Russian Space Agency were stunned to learn last week that the astronauts had begun digging into the 45-day food reserve -- which exists to protect against a delayed supply shipment -- in mid-November."

"The station's water supply is not nearly as dire and the two men have been encouraged to drink as much as they want."

And this is great: "Extra food and water has been packed into the supply ship that is scheduled to blast off from Kazakhstan on December 23, including some Asian delicacies -- dim sum dumplings for Chiao, a first-generation Chinese-American, and fried rice for Sharipov, who was born in what is now Kyrgyzstan in central Asia."

Space take-out. Who knew? Evidently it isn't guaranteed to be warm and fresh in thirty minutes or less...??? Looks like consumer space travel has one more bump to overcome.

Re:Space Takeout?? and From the Article (1)

BakedBeans (595539) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049977)

Hm.. these guys are eating 3,000 calories a day?? That's actually a lot of food intake for what are fit people in a minimal-effort environment.

Dropping that to 2,500 would be achievable if done in steps; say 100 calories a day.

Re:Space Takeout?? and From the Article (1)

gilesjuk (604902) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050058)

Well I guess it's a bit boring up there, it's not like they can go watch a movie :)

Re:Space Takeout?? and From the Article (2, Informative)

Shinobi (19308) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050070)

Actually, 3000 calories sounds pretty normal for very fit people in somewhat difficult conditions. Remember, the average male(on a global scale, not just the industrialized, lazy parts of the world) requires around 2300 kcal just to get by without the body deteriorating. Taking only myself into comparison, when I'm fully active with my normal training and stuff, I burn around 4000 kcal/day, just to keep up with the energy need, and I can go higher when pushing myself. Worst off are elite cyclists, elite soldiers in the field etc, who can require up to 12000 kcal/day if they want to avoid bodily deterioration.

Possible explainations (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049934)

1. Normal menu: gruel, dried-out bread, spam
Reserve supply menu: caviar, salmon, steak, black forest gateau

2. "Alien"-style aliens. They have to eat for two as pregnant women say.

3. Food supplies were injected with water to make them weigh more. Water evaporated into space.

4. Astronouts have been playing target practice firing spuds at Rupert Murdoch's communications sattelites

5. Some relativistic thing

6. Some quantum thing

7. Something to do with SCO

Don't bother with the Russian food jokes. (4, Insightful)

caluml (551744) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049939)

Before people start mocking Russians, and their food situation, just let me say that I ate more of, and better quality food when I was in Russia than I usually do in the UK. Salo though, is horrible stuff.

Re:Don't bother with the Russian food jokes. (3, Insightful)

djtrialprice (602555) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049958)

and better quality food when I was in Russia than I usually do in the UK

You do know that we Brits are the culinary laughing stock of the world? That's why I'm glad to be Scottish. Who else would think of the deep fried mars bar / deep fried pizza?

Re:Don't bother with the Russian food jokes. (1)

teg (97890) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050068)

You do know that we Brits are the culinary laughing stock of the world?

For a reason. There's happily a good amount of foreign restaurants there, though :)

That's why I'm glad to be Scottish. Who else would think of the deep fried mars bar / deep fried pizza?

The southern part of US... deep friend onions, bananas, mars bars, twinkies, turkeys.... anything.

Re:Don't bother with the Russian food jokes. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049966)

I ate more of, and better quality food when I was in Russia than I usually do in the UK.

Because most of us don't live in UK, we don't compare the food in Russia to food in UK. Russian food can be bad, but the British is even worse.

Re:Don't bother with the Russian food jokes. (0, Flamebait)

JollyFinn (267972) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049981)

They teach French in your schools. And this is the reason why.

Re:Don't bother with the Russian food jokes. (2, Insightful)

Nine Tenths of The W (829559) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049984)

It's called pricing. The money that gets you top quality beef in Russia gets you American fast food crap over here.

IN SOVIET RUSSIA (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050005)

Russian food mocks YOU!P.

Re:Don't bother with the Russian food jokes. (1)

Mariukenas (824757) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050032)

Salo is supposed to be eaten with onions/pickles and vodka. Non-fried potatoes are horrible too :)

You're making this WAY too easy (4, Funny)

upside (574799) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050050)

Must ... resist ... comment ... about English food.

I'm proud of myself, but the effort at self-restraint gave me a headache.

Open sauce application here? (4, Funny)

King_of_Prussia (741355) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049941)

IIRC, the database software that tracks the food inventories on board the space station and the space shuttle on longer flights runs on proprietary code. Perhaps if the software were revamped, and open source software used instead the community could help out a little? Many eyes make for few bugs -- and when the bugs are as easy to spot as the "food" entry reading zero I see no reason to put up with badly written, unfree software.

Hell, with the savings made they could probably upgrade the menus a bit, instead of eating paste three times a day they could afford to buy the astronauts some hot grits or something equally tasty once in a while.

Re:Open sauce application here? (1)

pklong (323451) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049962)

No software can keep track of hungry astronaughts raiding the fridge and not booking out what they have taken.

Re:Open sauce application here? (1)

Greventls (624360) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049988)

potential application of rfid tags?

Re:Open sauce application here? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050001)

Anyone wonder how long until someone gets just a little too foamy at the mouth and proclaims OSS to be the cure for cancer, AIDs, and the common cold?

This project needs to be put out of its misery. (4, Interesting)

sllim (95682) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049942)

I like my toys as much, no possibly MORE then the next guy. And God knows aviation is my thing.
The Space Station should be a no brainer.

But there comes a time where you have to say, 'Look we gave it the good old college try. If it was meant to be it would be a success already, but alas it isn't working out.'.

For Gods sake deorbit it already.

Could there possibly be a more humiliating end to the space station then being abondend for lack of food?

Re:This project needs to be put out of its misery. (1)

kfg (145172) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050000)

Could there possibly be a more humiliating end to the space station then being abondend for lack of food?

Being turned into Howard Stern's new studio?

KFG

Re:This project needs to be put out of its misery. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050009)

Why would that be humiliating?

Fucking conservative Stern-basher. Go listen to your Limbaugh

Re:This project needs to be put out of its misery. (1)

kfg (145172) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050044)

Why would that be humiliating?

I'm not sure how to answer a question answered with a question.

Fucking conservative Stern-basher.

I did not bash Howard Stern. To the extent that I am a conservative I support him. Supporting the First Ammendment is conservative. It is also liberal. You might want to give some consideration to what the word "conservative" means. I'm not sure it means what you think it means.

Go listen to your Limbaugh

This, however, I would have to consider a pretty dire personal attack.

KFG

Re:This project needs to be put out of its misery. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050057)

conservative means greedy, republican, white, christian, fat, american good old boy club. now git from here! go read your bible and pray for Stern's dirty soul.

Re:This project needs to be put out of its misery. (3, Insightful)

R.Caley (126968) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050025)

'Look we gave it the good old college try. If it was meant to be it would be a success already, but alas it isn't working out.'.

Whether it is a sucess depends on what you consider it's purpose to have been. In so far it has a purpose it is to exist and be manned, nothing more, and at that it has suceeded. The problems, beyond the expeted small technical ones, have all been due to America not having a worthwhile launch system to do their end of the job.

All of the other supposed purposes which it has not suceeded against were bogus anyway. No one had a real scientific mission for it for instance. These purposes were just made up to get the budget past politicians who had no interest in space projets per-se. So, except for the politics, there is no reason to worry that it hasn't achieved them.

Well..... (1)

kaedemichi255 (834073) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049946)

....it beats the Atkins diet ;)

And there's no real science going on... (3, Informative)

CodeWanker (534624) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049947)

This could be the final straw for the ISS boondoggle. You can't do astronomy from the station that's even a tenth of the precision of Hubble. Why? All the vibrations from all the environmental gear. In fact, you can't do decent science experiments [space.com] of any type. Why? Two people can't take time from just holding the place together to do the experiments, and we lack the budget (and now - the food!) to have a big enough crew to make the place something other than a multi-billion-dollar Astronaut Habitrail. [habitrail.com] Right now, it's no better than Mir was in its final days: astronauts spend all their time trying not to die. '"At present, the primary goal of the ISS is unclear," the NRC study observes.' I think it's dangerously close to changing from an investment to a sunk cost.

This has got to be one of the few jobs .... (4, Funny)

kernelblaha (756819) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049950)

...where finishing ahead of schedule is a bad thing!

Maybe the astronauts jus ate too much all year so that they can be back home for Christmas turkey.

sheesh (1)

caino59 (313096) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049954)

if that was me up there, i'd be pissed that the fastest they can come up with anything is 2 weeks away...and another 2 week away wait if the first one fails.

What if something serious happened up there?

*ding*
going up!

Re:sheesh (1)

pe1rxq (141710) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050059)

What if something serious happened up there?


In that case they would come down....
They do have an escape soyouz capsule.

Jeroen

Easy to solve send them Spam (1)

Portal1 (223010) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049956)

Spam Spam Spam
I know you like it.

This is really bad (5, Interesting)

Dancin_Santa (265275) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049957)

The problem with living in microgravity is that the lack of acceleration results in the decalcification of bones and the atrophy of muscle tissue. Some exercise (like the much-mocked Soloflex) can help stave off this atrophy, but the real key to the whole solution is to keep calcium and protein levels in the body high.

Restricting food intake will result in some very serious physical damage to the astronauts. If you've ever seen footage of astronauts who have just returned to Earth after a long mission, they are hardly able to stand. That is with full nutrition. The poor astronauts up there now will have to deal with much lowered calcium and protein reserves in their blood and will likely suffer from advanced osteoporosis as well as general muscular atrophy.

I'd go ahead and blame Windows programmers for this mistake. But in all seriousness, this is probably a result of the reliance on the cooperation of multiple nations to do the right thing according to the schedule. It's hard enough getting cats into a pen, it's that much harder to get countries known for 'cutting corners' (like Russia) to do their job correctly.

Re:This is really bad (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049974)

Please, don't feed the trolls. You'll only encourage them.

Re:This is really bad (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050054)

by posting as an AC you are a "troll"

damn, im feeing them too.

Re:This is really bad (3, Informative)

Wudbaer (48473) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050024)

It's hard enough getting cats into a pen, it's that much harder to get countries known for 'cutting corners' (like Russia) to do their job correctly.

Without the corner-cutting Russians they would have to wait for the next Space Shuttle for food... could be a long hungry wait. (yes, I know that they have a Soyus capsule for emergencies, which incidentially also is Russian).

Re:This is really bad (2, Insightful)

Tap-Sa (644107) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050026)

But in all seriousness, this is probably a result of the reliance on the cooperation of multiple nations to do the right thing according to the schedule.

Like regular shuttle flights...

Survivor! (4, Funny)

nacturation (646836) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049963)

Why not turn it into a new reality TV show, a la Survivor? This could easily provide a smidgen of the funding to keep the space station going. And instead of voting people off the space station, the person who loses a challenge gets eaten, so the food situation practically solves itself.

Re:Survivor! (1)

AC-x (735297) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050017)

Actually I seem to remember that before they started work on ISS there was some talk of doing a reality-tv series on board called Astronauts, heck I'd watch it. "This weeks we 'ave put the station-mates on a 'alf rations, lets see 'ow they're doin"

Confessions of a sated astronaut (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049967)

You know, whatcha gonna do...
No shit, there I was, the International Space Station. Just me and my two friends, up in space like a bunch of regular dopeheads. But yaknow, there's not much up here to really DO, if you know what I mean... Sure, there's all kinds of expensive equipment and laboratory experiments, but when you're off your shift, there's not much to do except staring out in space or trying to sleep.
Have you ever tried sleeping in zero-gee? Well, it doesn't work for me, so I decided to hit the fridge instead.
I know, I know, I shouldn't have, but when you're all alone at night up there in space, those tubes of processed food start to taste really good. So, okay, maybe I did eat a few tubes too many, but hey, put yourself in my shoes. As I said, there's not much else for us to do up there but to eat.

Well, that's my confession anyway, I didn't mean to eat all that much, and I sure hope we will get some new flavors when the supply boat comes on the 25th!

Sick Sick Nasa (2, Insightful)

Lili Queen of Darkne (837578) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049968)

Hey, they Nasa is such a wonderful organisation. They did : a poem (http://www.nasa.gov/multimedia/artgallery/soto_po em.html/ [nasa.gov] ), some photo shoots with aerosmith (http://http//www.nasa.gov/multimedia/videogallery /index.html [http] ) and so much more. What can you say, i guess now is the time for serious issues, like food on space stations, lol. Those who wonder at those who do wonder, while those who do, well, do. Unless, i do wonder?

Interesting and worrying too! (3, Interesting)

bogaboga (793279) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049969)

It's interesting to note that as Americans, who believe we have the best and greatest technology on the globe (though we depend a lot on other countires), cannot get [back] to the Space Station unless we utilize "out-dated" Russian technology!

This hurts me because in a few decades, when the majority of our manufacturing base has been outsourced, we'll have to depend on outside help for the very basics of our way of life. This is already happening if one considers the flu vaccine.

The Russians, though poor, seem to make better technical decisions. I remember a slashdotter mentioning here sometime ago that Russian helicopters can be fixed with the simplest of everyday materials and still deliver (read reliably fly)! Contrast that with American ones that require hours of maintenance for a few hours of flight. The Sea Kings (of Canada) require 30 hours of maintenance for every hour of flight, and they are unavailable for operations 40 per cent of the time. http://www.cbc.ca/news/background/cdnmilitary/seak ing.html [www.cbc.ca] .

Imagine...........!

Re:Interesting and worrying too! (1)

tekrat (242117) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050016)



Although ironically, we're the last to get the really good Japanese gadgets, and for some reason, American TV shows premeire in the UK before they air on American TV. Go figure....

Re:Interesting and worrying too! (1)

DNS-and-BIND (461968) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050033)

The Russian stuff is simple not out of philosophy, but because they're forced to make do with whatever is availible. Sure, the heli will fly, but does it have radar, GPS, IFF, air conditioning, redundant controls, and other modern comforts? I sure as hell wouldn't fly on a Russian aircraft.

The Canadaian example is sad...though it's entirely due to the gov't underfunding their military and not buying new helis to replace the ancient Sea Kings. Used to be, the Canadian Forces punched far about their weight class. These days, they've atrophied so far, I don't know if they can recover.

Re:Interesting and worrying too! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050061)

Americans do have some of "... the best and greatest technology on the globe ..." but is it always appropriate and necessary? Whether or not this is really true I'm not sure but I like the story anyway.

The Americans decided their astronauts needed an ink pen that would work in microgravity and spent vast summs of money and resources developing a way for the ink to flow properly in a weightless environment. I think you can even buy these pens for yourself now.

What do the Russians do?

Use a pencil!

meanwhile, in the most expensive SPA in the sky (1)

jsveiga (465473) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049970)

...the creature's growing attraction to the humans makes it harder and harder for it to stay hidden. The cold, shrink-wrapped supplies it has been feeding from tastes like plastic, and something inside it slowly takes the form of a desire for warm, wet, red flesh...

Where did the food go? Joketime! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049975)

Where'd the space-food go?
  1. Sally Struther's stowed away!
  2. Somebody's got a... space tapeworm! (echo echo echo...)
  3. The astronauts threw all their carbs out the airlock during the Atkins diet fad
  4. They're actually low on fuel and are using the unpopular food as mass reaction mass for station-keeping.
  5. One of the astronauts is a mole whose mission is to inocuously sabotage the mission so that the ISS can be mothballed early and the funds diverted.
  6. They grew some chronic weed in the spare hydroponic bay... and... got the munchies (shhh!)
  7. Space Herpes! (nobody's seen Ice Pirates have they?)
  8. The food shortage was planned -- the astronauts are performing a life-extension experiment by going on a calorie-restricted diet IN SPACE (echo echo echo)
  9. The astronauts were secretly put on space-steroids, which vastly increased their appetites.
  10. In Korea, only old mission controllers count calories.
I'm all out of ideas... now I have to get back to work for Conan O'Brian's sad sad show.

Re:Where did the food go? Joketime! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11049992)

With writers like you its no wonder Conan is #1!!!

Re:Where did the food go? Joketime! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050015)

yeah Ice pirates was a great scifi Bmovie from the 1980's. The time travel stuff was hokey but I like the idea of fighting for water because we are going to do that in the future to

How many astronauts? (2, Insightful)

hashwolf (520572) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049979)

"...the astronauts, one American and one Russian..." That's just ONE astronaut right?

Re:How many astronauts? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050028)

yea, that's one astronaut and one cosmonaut

Why Diet? (1)

haxhia (783279) | more than 9 years ago | (#11049993)

I thought the only people that diet are the people that want to lose weight. For example people in Ethiopia were trying to achieve perfectness--getting back to their birth weight....but these astronauts , surely they have passed that stage.....they weight nothing....i'm confused.

Let's do a benefit concert! (1)

tekrat (242117) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050004)

To help those starving astronauts!

Just like the 80's when Ethopia needed food, or those Willy Nelson Farm-Aid concerts, we can get a group of singers to make a song about Xmas and feeding those in space!

"Feed the world! And Space Station guys too!"

Where's Michael Jackson when you need him?

The Alternate idea is to make Space Station Survior and turn it into a reality TV show. The problem is -- there aren't enough whackos on the station -- we need to add a few more "aggressive personalities" to liven up the show.

Although a few hot-babes wrestling with each other in Zero-Gee should be interesting TV, that's for sure.

Who ate all the pies? (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050008)

"An independent team is looking into how the food inventory ended up being tracked so poorly and how it can be improved in the future."

Looks like they have one Mr. H Simpson aboard!
Mmmmm space doughnuts... Woohoo! I've lost 95lbs! Woohoo! Mmmmm freeze dried christmas cake... mmm... Woohoo I'm still 0lbs!

Just don't let him get at the ant colony.

Tell me this isn't serious... (2, Insightful)

RAMMS+EIN (578166) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050014)

I know April is still quite far off, but just look at it:

``NASA and the Russian Space Agency were stunned to learn last week that the astronauts had begun digging into the 45-day food reserve -- which exists to protect against a delayed supply shipment -- in mid-November.''

Do they seriously mean that:

1. The astronauts weren't supplied with enough food
2. The situation was so bad they had to dig into the reserves
3. They didn't tell Earth about this?

If this is how seriously the people involved take their mission, I say we cut the funding right here, right now.

I've never been able to see space flight as anything but a waste of time, energy and money, but I've been okay with it; other people have lives and opinions too. But time and time again it turns out they don't do it properly. Exploding rockets and space shuttles, confusing metric and imperial units, failed Mars missions, and now this.

Question seeking an honest answer (1)

Doomsdaisy (90430) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050019)

Does this spacesuit make me look fat? I mean, seriously? Space travel always makes me feel soooooo bloated.

Once again Russia bails America out (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#11050020)

Where would you be without them?

Raiding the fridge... (1)

borud (127730) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050021)

I guess someone has been raiding the fridge at the ISS.

Re:Raiding the fridge... (2, Funny)

R.Caley (126968) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050043)

They should never have included those suspicious looking brownies in the last supply run.

Thats the way it goes.... (1)

WegianWarrior (649800) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050027)

...when you can't sleep and raid the fridge every night ;)


Seriosly thought, What worries me the most isn't that they have started eating of the reserves - because thats why you have reserves - but that it took so long for people to notice.

can they? (2, Interesting)

GerbilSocks (713781) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050042)

Any possibilities of them reconstituting their own poop?

I wonder how long you could survive on (1)

jago25_98 (566531) | more than 9 years ago | (#11050051)

Whey and flax oil powder? Maybe some vitimins too.

Maybe I'll try it myself. If my blog goes a bit quiet consider it failed

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