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Astrologer Sues NASA Over Comet Probe

CmdrTaco posted more than 9 years ago | from the gotta-hate-when-that-happens dept.

It's funny.  Laugh. 999

0110011001110101 writes "NASA's mission that sent a space probe smashing into a comet raised more than cosmic dust -- it also brought a lawsuit from a Russian astrologer. 'Bai is seeking damages totaling $300 million -- the approximate equivalent of the mission's cost -- for her "moral sufferings," Izvestia said, citing her lawyer Alexander Molokhov. She earlier told the paper that the experiment would "deform her horoscope." ' "

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Her parents should be proud... (4, Funny)

It doesn't come easy (695416) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985727)

Obviously at least one Russian citizen has wholeheartedly embraced the US style of democracy.

Re:Her parents should be proud... (0, Offtopic)

Rosco P. Coltrane (209368) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985778)

In so...

Nah...

Re:Her parents should be proud... (1, Offtopic)

chris_mahan (256577) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985859)

That would be:

In So...

(don't forget capitalization... :)

Yeah (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985795)

Because even when someone does something stupid and wrong in another country, in the end it has to be the fault of the US!

Re:Her parents should be proud... (5, Interesting)

Bob3141592 (225638) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985821)

Of course, if this suit is allowed to proceed, doesn't that also open her up to suits by her clients for all the predictions she made that didn't work out perfectly? 3oo million probably won't be enough for her to pay all the suits she'll lose if the courts determine astrology is legally valid and binding.

Re:Her parents should be proud... (5, Funny)

Saeger (456549) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985849)

Greedy parasitism isn't democr... oh.

The Russian court has got see reason, here. (3, Interesting)

The I Shing (700142) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985729)

If the Russian court agrees to let this case proceed, it opens the door for all kinds of inane, utterly frivolous lawsuits from astrologers, witch doctors, faith healers, and every other kind of kook out there who wants to make a quick buck by accusing actual scientists of violating some crackpot principle. I'm not an objectivist, but I have to say that Ayn Rand must be rolling over in her grave.

Re:The Russian court has got see reason, here. (5, Funny)

Nplugd (662449) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985816)

Right, because "inane, utterly frivolous lawsuits" never EVER happened in the US so far. Ever.

Re:The Russian court has got see reason, here. (4, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985831)

If the Russian court agrees to let this case proceed, it opens the door for all kinds of inane, utterly frivolous lawsuits from astrologers, witch doctors, faith healers, and every other kind of kook out there who wants to make a quick buck by accusing actual scientists of violating some crackpot principle.

On the other hand, it would also show very clearly that there's absolutely no evidence that such crackpot theories are valid. Think about it - this woman stands to gain $300 million if she can show that her particular crackpot theory is valid. If the court case proceeds, and she can't show that astrology works - given some pretty damn big incentive - then perhaps less people will be inclined to believe in astrology.

By the way, what's the deciding factor between whether or not something is a) a crackpot theory, b) a superstition, or c) a religion? Seems to me, the amount of believers and money involved has something to do with it.

A crackpot theory is typically believed by one or two people. Astrology is a cottage industry. And Christianity has a billion believers and stupid amounts of money.

Re:The Russian court has got see reason, here. (4, Insightful)

lheal (86013) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985895)

then perhaps less people will be inclined to believe in astrology.

Nope, not a chance. The publicity would just legitimize astrology. When the suit was finally decided in NASA's favor, believers would just spin it that NASA had better lawyers.

People who believe in astrology don't do so because of logic. They cling to the hope that the universe is not just a giant machine, that they are somehow made unique among humans by their keen intelligence, inside knowledge, and special placement in it.

Re:The Russian court has got see reason, here. (5, Insightful)

flabbergasted (518911) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985833)

Yeah, the next thing you know a bunch of fundamentalist christians will be trying to force through laws to push their form of creationism into public classrooms.

Re:The Russian court has got see reason, here. (4, Interesting)

Austerity Empowers (669817) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985882)

No way, that'll never happen. That's just taking it too far.

On a side note, I have to leave Texas before my children get in to school. I already had my "linux" fish ripped off my car once since I moved here.

Re:The Russian court has got see reason, here. (2, Insightful)

erroneus (253617) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985880)

Among the list of "crankpots" should we include mainstream religion and their various objections to things like cloning? I fail to see how mainstream religion differs significantly from the rest of the crackpots... I mean if you overlook the organization, political power and all that.

Re:The Russian court has got see reason, here. (2, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985916)

I know it's not a popular view on this site, so this'll likely get modded to troll pretty quickly (people here don't seem open minded enough to tolerate different points of view), but your comments show a complete misunderstanding of some of these groups of which you so willingly disparage.

I've seen faith healers do things M.D.s can't. While I'm not a Christian, I have to point out that when Jesus healed people he said, "Your faith has made you well," giving credit for the miracle to the person's ability to believe, not to himself. I've seen many posts on /. about how bad religion is, but I have yet to see one by someone who has actually taken time to understand religion or any spiritual beliefs. I don't mean just taking them apart and saying it's all psychology and the "opiate of the masses" type thing, but I mean by someone who has REALLY taken time to understand faith or any type of spirituality.

There are things science can't always explain. I've seen astrolgers that don't know me but have written up complete reports about who I am and what I feel, think, and believe -- without ever having met me. I've seen people healed by faith healers, and I've met psychics who can vividly describe situations and people that later become part of my life. And before you start talking about "cold reading", I have a solid background in psychology, and did not give these people a chance to meet me or be exposed to me to cold read me.

The difference is I have always been open to different beliefs and, rather than judging them as negative or people in them as "kooks", I've taken the time to find out about many religious, many pseudo-relogions, and as many belief systems as I could explore. I've seen things happen that you would claim are impossible -- yet I've seen them happen in ways that are scientifically valid, such as double blind studies.

Like I said, the difference is that I was open and willing to explore, instead of judging and speaking about what I did not know.

Re:The Russian court has got see reason, here. (2, Informative)

Flyboy Connor (741764) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985932)

Actually, lawsuits by crackpots are not uncommon. Especially producers of "alternative" medicine are prone to sueing people who state that their product doesn't work. Normally, such a case is judged on the fact whether it can be shown objectively that the defendants statements were false. Science is objective, and such cases are therefore usually resolved by a loss of the crackpot (since alternative medicine is alternative because science has shown that it doesn't really work). I think in this case the same reasoning applies: the question is whether it can be shown objectively that astrology works, and that thus the cook was damaged. As science has shown time and again, astrology is garbage, so the cook will not be able to cash.

old news (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985735)

This was out months ago. I thought she failed anyway.

Somebody needs to step out of the middle ages... (2)

afd8856 (700296) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985736)

Although I'm an east european myself, I hate "irrational beliefs", especially when they lead to ridiculous lawsuits.

Re:Somebody needs to step out of the middle ages.. (1)

tomhudson (43916) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985790)

I hate "irrational beliefs", especially when they lead to ridiculous lawsuits.
So I see you've encountered the three monkeys: McBride, Merkey, and Wallace.

Someone should do a "Daily Show" routine on a weekly basis using these guys for material.

How good an astrologer is she? (5, Funny)

FunWithHeadlines (644929) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985737)

"She earlier told the paper that the experiment would "deform her horoscope."

Oh, and she didn't see this coming?

Re:How good an astrologer is she? (1)

garcia (6573) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985852)

Obviously she knows she will win ;)

Re:How good an astrologer is she? (1)

orange haired boy (889758) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985884)

Precisely. I can just imagine the debates now. Problem is that if her life does go to hell, she will blame NASA, everyone else will blame self-fulfilling prophecy. If you believe your life will go to hell, then you will find a way to make it happen. I personally think this is rediculous. I refuse to let my fate be decided by astral bodies...even though I'm a pisces.

That's not the only lawsuit (4, Funny)

arc.light (125142) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985741)

It appears the inhabitants of Tempel-1 are lawsuit-happy [transterrestrial.com] as well.

Re:That's not the only lawsuit (1)

Barryke (772876) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985826)

looks like her horroscope now has a stamp on it saying "1 et Prcpui 50 n 1 abrat 05135"

We need a price (2)

inu_maru (843192) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985746)

for the most moronic suit of the week

We need a _price_ ? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985827)

I'd say 2 cents.

That's my 2 cents anyways.

Whoops, I just gave it to you, guess someone else will have to pay the Russian lady.

Re:We need a price (1)

fitten (521191) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985844)

a "prize" or a "price"?

Re:We need a price (1)

brouski (827510) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985853)

You probably meant to say "prize", but I think "price" works too in this case. That will take care of some of these worthless lawsuits.

NASA's next probe (5, Funny)

dave-tx (684169) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985748)

NASA's reply to Marina Bai: "Would you be happier if our next probe was smashed into Uranus?"

Re:NASA's next probe (2, Funny)

PhilHibbs (4537) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985780)

They're going to name it "Urectum" to avoid all the silly jokes.

Re:NASA's next probe (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985845)

FRY: This is a great, as long as you don't make me smell Uranus. Heh heh.
LEELA: I don't get it.
PROFESSOR FARNSWORTH: I'm sorry, Fry, but astronomers renamed Uranus in 2620 to end that stupid joke once and for all.
FRY: Oh. What's it called now?
PROFESSOR FARNSWORTH: Urectum.

Re:NASA's next probe (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985802)

She would.

Russian chicks love getting their gaping assholes filled with cock. Then they go down the street and have an abortion, because their poor education system has failed to inform them that feces + semen won't produce babies.

Don't encourage NASA to do anything that would reinforce these Russians' behavior.

Re:NASA's next probe (1)

donleyp (745680) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985848)

What an ass.

Lets fire lawyers at the rock next time? (0, Troll)

cliffski (65094) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985749)

Seriously, without the huge surplus lawyer-mountain in the US, crazy shit like this wouldnt be an option. Why fire a perfectly good space probe at a comet when we could propel a bunch of lawyers instead, preferably shackled to their brain-dead clients.
I think US judges should be given encouragement to laugh in the faces of morons who bring court cases like this, and to charge them costs big time to put them off pulling such pathetic stunts.

Re:Lets fire lawyers at the rock next time? (2, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985825)

Careful, man. The rest of the universe would see that for what it is- the Earthlings firing weapons of mass litigation out into free space.

Such barbaric acts of open hostility would not be tolerated by the Universal Counsel. The Arashongon battle fleet would surely arrive to pulverize the Earth in short order!

Re:Lets fire lawyers at the rock next time? (2, Funny)

Shadow Wrought (586631) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985835)

What do you call shooting 100 lawyers at a comet from a space probe?
A good start.

The best thing about Lwayer jokes? Easily adaptable to any circumstance;-)

Re:Lets fire lawyers at the rock next time? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985900)

Uhh... right... because eliminating lawyers from the US will cut down on the number of crazy Russians filing lawsuits in Russian courts (overseen by Russian judges) using Russian lawyers.

Re:Lets fire lawyers at the rock next time? (1)

LnxAddct (679316) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985927)

Thats all great and what not...I agree with everything, but this is in Russia which simply means that those lawyers have learned to swim and spread across the continents. (..has a flashback to the scene in land of the dead where the zombies learn they can go in water).
Regards,
Steve

Waaa. (5, Funny)

say__10 (768448) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985751)

I wish NASA would be as cynical as I am in their response. "Are you going to cry about it?" Then proceed to blow chunks out of 10 or 15 more comets, to show them who is boss.

Re:Waaa. (0)

Rosco P. Coltrane (209368) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985907)

Well, I have heard two interesting comments on this whole comet-smashing business:

One was yesterday on EuroNews (the European CNN): an shy-looking astronomer was interviewed and she said something to the effect of "you know, that experiment is sort of interesting, but we regret this "american buckaroo-style" (sic) way of doing space research, as a probe that could land and latch on the comet, then drill and study things would have done a better job for not much more money."

The other comment I've heard, from a friend who studies all kinds of space things, is that he hoped NASA picked their comet-target right, because they probably changed its trajectory in minute ways, and it could come back to haunt us if it happens to be cyclical with a very long period, and NASA didn't know about it, and it came back with something that looks like a collision course in the future.

So, I don't know personally I hope NASA doesn't go about blowing 10 or 15 more comets "to show who's boss". And on a personal side, I'd tend to agree with the astronomer's point of view and I believe more gentle probing should be developed, and I hope astronomers don't get into the habit of smashing things up to study what they want, because it's just not elegant. This said, if the experiment works, good for them and great for science.

dupe (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985752)

dupe!!!!

She should have been able to predict it (2, Interesting)

tomhudson (43916) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985753)

Fucking moron astrologers.

I predict she will lose!

Don't claim to tell me my future when you can't even tell me what I had for breakfast. Wanna really impress me? Buy the winning lottery ticket. Over. And Over. And Over.

Re:She should have been able to predict it (1)

nosaj72 (615582) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985811)

Maybe you should go visit this one [boston.com] .

Re:She should have been able to predict it (1)

tomhudson (43916) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985917)

We've had that happen up here too. While the odds are high for any one individual, over time its bound to happen.

Its like that old question: If I flip a coin 5 times and it comes up heads each time, what are the odds that the 6th flip will also be heads? The answer is still 50-50.

Or, given 30 kids in a classroom, what are the odds that 2 will share the same birthday? Most people think 30/365, when in fact the odds are very high.

Re:She should have been able to predict it (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985921)

even a broken clock is right twice a day.

ie. you do something enough, that outcome is bound to happen.

and if enough people do something, xyz outcome will eventually occur.

Well then (5, Funny)

epiphani (254981) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985754)

That settles it! I'm going ahead with my lawsuit against slashdot. I've never gotten a first post, and its fucked up my chi.

time to join forces (1)

ChipMonk (711367) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985941)

Perhaps you could get class-action status with Ms. Bai. Then you'd have the Bai-Chi lawsuit.

Thanks, and remember to tip your server.

Bit silly (3, Funny)

lilmouse (310335) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985755)

NASA should charge this nut for deftly moving the comet a milimeter from its original course, thus saving his love-life from complete misery.

OTOH, I'm glad to see the Russians finally learning to do things the American Way (i.e., sue the pants off everyone).

--LWM

Re:Bit silly (2, Funny)

tomhudson (43916) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985873)

OTOH, I'm glad to see the Russians finally learning to do things the American Way (i.e., sue the pants off everyone).
No, it only means we're going to get more russian spam like this:
Subject: Y0u4 FR33 V4C4T10N IS R34DY

How I Made $$$$ by SUING NASA.

Comrade, I am writing you with this GREAT BUSINESS OPPORTUNITY. Surely you must have heard about the astrologer who sued NASA for wrecking her horoscope?

Remember all those rumours of the SPACE SHUTTLE LAUNCHES CHANGING THE CLIMATE? You too can sue NASA for all the costs you've run into, such as having to buy air conditioners, an outdoor pool, and vacations to cooler lcimes.

Think of it. Who wouldn't want a FREE SWIMMING POOL?

Don't be like the last person who rejected this offer, and had a chunk of SPACE DEBRIS kill their family dog (or if you do, remember to CALL US so we can GET YOU COMPENSATION).

Deewey, Cheetum, and Howe, LLP
1-888-BUT-PLUG

I should sue them, too (2, Funny)

daniil (775990) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985757)

After all, they did just alter my fate. If a butterfly flapping its wings can cause a hurricane, then who knows what consequences this change of Universal order might have!

News? (1, Redundant)

Sandbox Conspiracy (836255) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985758)

At the risk of getting modded Troll, as an astrologer, shouldn't she have seen this coming anyway? Maybe it's time for her to look into other career opportunities.

Her morals are suffering? (4, Insightful)

squiggleslash (241428) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985759)

What, exactly, are "moral sufferings"? When your sense of values is in some way damaged?

Is this why she's suing? Because, thanks to NASA, she doesn't have any morals, and therefore is absolutely fine with the idea of frivolous lawsuits?

Is this what happened to Jeffrey Vernon Merkey [merkeylaw.com] too?

Re:Her morals are suffering? (1)

Creepy Crawler (680178) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985889)

rofl... Gotta read that tripe ;P

32. Defendant slashdot.org is an far-right wing Internet news website that posts libelous and defamatory content and is used by Open Source Community members to anonymously post hate speech, death threats, threats to murder and promotes and advocates acts of domestic terrorism within the United States. The address and location of defendants is believed to be within the State of California, but is unknown at the present time.

Im gonna kill whoever said that!!!!!!!11111one...

I know, I know (raises hand) (2, Funny)

squarefish (561836) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985760)

She needs to be beaten with a clue by four [everything2.com]

well.... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985766)

in Soviet Russia comet sue you

Queue 'em up (0)

RealBeanDip (26604) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985767)

In Soviet Russia, comet probe DEFORMS YOU!

Far reaching aspects of this case (3, Insightful)

ReformedExCon (897248) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985769)

The woman is suing the government for depriving her of her ability to make an income in her current profession. Her allegation is that the government (through NASA) has fundamentally shifted the course of celestial bodies with the impact and that she is entitled to monetary recompense.

This is so similar to how the record companies are fighting tooth and nail to stop people from changing the RIAA's business model.

Is someone entitled to make a living? Should the government be in the business of putting people out of work?

Re:Far reaching aspects of this case (1)

Conspiracy_Of_Doves (236787) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985863)

Given the fact that Astrology is complete garbage anyway, the destruction of this asteroid does not harm her ability to make an income. She can simply make up some crap about how some other asteroid is affecting people's personal lives.

Re:Far reaching aspects of this case (4, Interesting)

jusdisgi (617863) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985934)

The woman is suing the government for depriving her of her ability to make an income in her current profession.

Bullshit.

Changing the course of a celestial body in no way deprives this person of her livelihood. She's supposed to read the movements of the stars, right? Ok, so this was one of them. We, humans, products of the universe, make changes to it just like stars and planets exert their own forces on comets. An astrologer should be reading the movements, not complaining about them being made.

Now, naturally, since she's just making this shit up anyway, what it really amounts to is an increase in her ability to make income; she can call all her clients up and say "You must come in immediately for a new reading, as NASA has just fucked up the heavens." and dupe these poor sons of bitches yet again. And if anybody thinks this lady is up to anything but a (successful) publicity stunt, you're way off base.

Also, in more direct conflict of the parent statement:

1)TFA doesn't say she's suing them for loss-of-business damages, but "moral sufferings" ....you just made that up.
2)300 million? How long would it have taken her to earn that much? Because that's what the damages would be determined by if the cause of action was what you claim. It isn't.

Cost analysis (3, Funny)

TripMaster Monkey (862126) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985771)

From TFA:
Marina Bai has sued the U.S. space agency, claiming the Deep Impact probe that punched a crater into the comet Tempel 1 late Sunday "ruins the natural balance of forces in the universe"
Bai is seeking damages totaling $300 million -- the approximate equivalent of the mission's cost -- for her "moral sufferings"
So...the cost of ruining the 'natural balance of forces in the universe' is $300 mil US. Wonder how she arrived at that figure...could we see a breakdown?

discount? (1)

NoSuchGuy (308510) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985861)

So...the cost of ruining the 'natural balance of forces in the universe' is $300 mil US. Wonder how she arrived at that figure...could we see a breakdown?

May a discount?

Not the first (5, Interesting)

Crashmarik (635988) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985772)

A few years ago a psychic in florida sued a MRI facility. Her claim was that the MRI had robbed her of her psychic abilities.

Re:Not the first (5, Funny)

Chris Mattern (191822) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985804)

> A few years ago a psychic in florida sued a MRI facility. Her claim was that the MRI had robbed her
> of her psychic abilities.

According to her lawyer, "She had no idea this would happen."

Chris Mattern

oblig!! (1)

God'sDuck (837829) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985773)

Attention All Comets: in Capitalist America, Astrologers predict You!

What if? (1)

jaylee7877 (665673) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985774)

I figured someone would do something like this with the destructive nature of the project. What if we had nuked the moon? [space.com] . The lawyer bill alone would have bankrupted the US government.

Violent americans up to no good again! (3, Funny)

bani (467531) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985775)

You infidel aggressors are simply not content to bomb afghanistan and iraq!

American aggressors are now bombing innocent comets!

What do you think you will find, WMD or oil in Tempel I? Stupid USA!

NASA should go back to doing what it does best, making fake moon landings!

umm.. right.... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985776)

Anyone know what her horoscope was?

Re:umm.. right.... (1)

Adelbert (873575) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985918)

"You may come into money sometime soon. Just bear in mind that you may not deserve it. Remember what good that money could have done."

Or, alternatively,

"You will make yourself look like a fucking retard today."

Your Daily Horoscope (5, Funny)

BorisSkratchunkov (642046) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985777)

You may be persecuted by American space agencies today, dear Libra. However, despite your "moral sufferings" you will be able to gain great fortune from friends, family, and coworkers. Embrace your lawyers, Libra, for they will save you from the unnatural entropy of the universe caused by space probe crashes!

If horoscopes are about predicting the future (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985779)

shouldn't she have already known this was going to happened and incorporated it into future calculations?

Wow! That's it! (1)

Patchw0rk F0g (663145) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985781)

You know, we've added mass to the planet Mars now, too, with the inclusion of those pesky rovers.

Being a Gemini, now I know why everythings been going so shitty in my life for the last few months: Mars is out of alignment!

But where are the others? (1)

ziggamon2.0 (796017) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985783)

Sure, out of her point of view (she probably believes in this) and her business model, such a law suit seems completely logical.

My question is though: Why haven't any other astrologer complained about this? Are their horoscopes not broken? How does that work?

Just WOW (1)

korekrash (853240) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985784)

All I can say is Wow. That is the most outrageous load of crap I have ever seen I think, next to the SCO suit, lol.....she should be charged with some form of crime for wasting a public officials time or something, at the very least she should be placed in a mental institution if she's serious.

She should have seen it coming. (1)

Stumbles (602007) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985787)

LOL.......eh? Now why didn't I think of that.

Russian suing American Government?!? (1)

casings (257363) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985788)

I smell a sitcom.

Paradox... (1)

Arthur B. (806360) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985791)

As an astrologer he should believe in destiny... If the comet was blown up it was meant to be and already written in the stars. Why would he worry about that ?

Counter sue. (4, Funny)

LWATCDR (28044) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985808)

If this goes through I will counter sue for one billion dollars. The damage to my karma this will cause will be HUGE. I mean it. I will be so mad at this woman that my aura will never be the same. I could end up coming back as a rat or worse fan of Ayn Rand or some other low form of life.
What amount of money would be enough to make up for this eternal setback? A billion would be a good start.

On a more reasonable note. You can sue anyone for anything. It is nothing but a stunt.

weird people (1)

nhaas (896995) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985810)

Id like to sue her for being stupid!

$300 - (1)

Trippee (799704) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985814)

That's a lot of emtotional damages!

Deform? (4, Funny)

Viking Coder (102287) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985818)

She earlier told the paper that the experiment would "deform her horoscope."

NASA: Okay - how's about this - we spend all the money required to create a new horoscope, which incorporates the changes we made to the "fabric of the universe", and has just as much predictive power as your old horoscope.

Total price: $0.

Studying astronomy instead of astrology: Priceless.

For bullshit predictions based on the position of the planets at the moment of your birth, there's Madame Marina Bai. For everything else there's NASA.

Let it proceed... (3, Interesting)

moz25 (262020) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985819)

I'm certainly interested in seeing such a case appear in court. Usually, charlatans such as these take care to avoid independent scrutiny and measurability. To let it appear before court would place her in the position of having to prove the had any abilities to begin with... and that's going to work against her the most. At least, I'm guessing the judge is going to be a lot more emotionally independent than her clients who probably have an emotional interest in believing in her abilities.

Besides, she has 1 million dollars waiting for her if she can prove she has paranormal abilities [randi.org]

Open the floodgates (1)

krell (896769) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985823)

Pretty soon, there are going to be a lot of lawsuits against the Martians for the pain and humiliation of all those "probes" over the years.

class action status (1)

BobVila (592015) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985829)

Why didn't she file for class action status? This potentially altered everyone's horoscopes.

Astrologers are morons anyway (4, Insightful)

Pope (17780) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985832)

The whole Zodiac system was made up 2000 years ago, on the idea that your 'sign' was the one that the sun rose into on your birthday. At the present time, the Earth has precessed something like 15 degrees, so the sun actually rises 1 sign away from where it originally did. (thanks Bill Nye!)

Fuck these goddamn superstitious idiots anyway, we left the caves a long time ago.

sure, why not. (2, Insightful)

supernova87a (532540) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985837)

I say that if she, while blindfolded and away from any source of news, could have told the authorities the exact instant the impact occurred, and supposedly changed all the "energy fields" and "balance of the universe", by all means, let her lawsuit be heard!

Defense (3, Funny)

retinaburn (218226) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985839)

Defense Lawyer: Your honour, if you let this case proceed our court systems will be flooded with inane frivolous lawsuits, and the number of lawyers in our country will rise exponentially. As proof I would like to enter into Evident Exhibit A, the United States legal system.

Judge: Case Dismissed!

Class Action Lawsuits (1)

djrok212 (801670) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985841)

I say we turn this into a Class Action lawsuit, her's can't be the only horoscope thats been horribly altered.

Looks like a brilliant publicity stunt. (1)

DeafDumbBlind (264205) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985842)

The case will be thrown out of court, but she'll have thousands of new clients.

And /. is of course duing its part in this promotion.

"Izvestia" russian for mcbride (1)

truckaxle (883149) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985851)

If it is this would explain a lot.

Re:"Izvestia" russian for mcbride (1)

iapetus (24050) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985892)

I know you're joking, but for the record 'Izvestia' means 'News' and 'Pravda', one of Russia's other leading papers means 'Truth'.

Hence the old Russian joke that there's no Izvestia in Pravda and no Pravda in Izvestia.

Sue the earth (1)

kyoko21 (198413) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985871)

For shifting the poles every 20,000 years.

Slashdotter sues Taco over dupes (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#12985876)

Puhlease.. Don't waste our time with newswire trash. Slashdot isn't even timely on this stuff.

Make her prove it (1)

MontyApollo (849862) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985878)

Take it to court and make her prove that her readings were accurate before they were "deformed."

NASA's dark secret... (5, Funny)

NotQuiteReal (608241) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985883)

The REAL reason they popped that comet, was to improve the Feng-shui of the local celestial neighborhood.

In soviet russia (1)

Celt (125318) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985885)

In soviet russia comets sue you!

Pioneer 10 (1)

parasonic (699907) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985886)

And who will be to blame when Pioneer 10 is shot out of the sky? I highly doubt that the Klingon High Council would allow such a preposterous lawsuit.

Horoscope for 4 - 10 juli (2, Funny)

Bromrrrrr (166605) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985896)

The lawsuit you will start this week will be lost. Also you will be the laughing stock of the world.

*sigh* damn space probe......

Right... (2, Funny)

kingj02 (698534) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985898)

And I'm going to sue Bill Gates b/c of these [neowin.net] . They've been haunting my dreams for a while now!

Let's All Sue NASA & U.S. Media (1)

creimer (824291) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985901)

I would like to file a class-action lawsuit against NASA and the U.S. media for traumatizing my teenage years with the repeated showings of the Space Shuttle Challenger explosion. I'm also filing a seperate class-action lawsuit against NASA and the U.S. media for traumatizing my adult years with repeated showing of the Space Shuttle Columbia fatal re-entry. With the repeated showings of both accidents, I was discouraged from pursuing my dream as an astronaut and I now flip hamburgers for a living.

I would've filed a class-action lawsuit against NASA and the U.S. media for the Apollo 1 accident but that was before my time. :P

"Oh, Mother..." (1)

what_the_frell (690581) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985905)

"...Don't be so sentimental, things explode every day."

New Amendment? (1)

joey_knisch (804995) | more than 9 years ago | (#12985912)

Can judges bitchslap plantifs?

If not, I think an amendment is in order.
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