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FDA OKs Brain Pacemaker for Depression

CmdrTaco posted more than 9 years ago | from the shocking-developments dept.

Biotech 456

Duke Machesne writes "On Friday, the FDA approved a new therapy for the severely depressed who have run out of treatment options: a pacemaker-like implant that sends tiny electric shocks to the brain. The Food and Drug Administration's clearance opens Cyberonics Inc.'s vagus nerve stimulator, or VNS, as a potential treatment for an estimated 4 million Americans with hard-to-treat depression - despite controversy over whether it's really been proven to work."

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The Terminal Man (4, Funny)

Gothmolly (148874) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126144)

let the numerous tinfoil hat references begin!

Re:The Terminal Man (1)

sanosuke001 (640243) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126424)

Yeah, I read the book and it didn't seem like it worked too well then....

Re:The Terminal Man (1)

sanosuke001 (640243) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126511)

Yeah, I read The Terminal Man and it didn't seem like it worked too well then.... though I heard about some rats with an electrode attached to the "pleasure center" of their brains and everytime they hit a switch, they would get a shock. Needless to say, the rats died of heart attacks, I believe. Good way to go if you ask me.

Re:The Terminal Man (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126592)

funny, that was my first reaction when i read this too. that book scared the crap out of me when i read it 15 years ago... and now it begins :-D

Similar to Parkinson's? (2, Interesting)

Trixter (9555) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126148)

First post! (Always wanted to say that) But in reality, isn't this the same treatment for severe cases of Parkinson's? Have those patients shown mood changes as well?

Re:Similar to Parkinson's? (4, Informative)

Jeffrey Baker (6191) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126190)

I don't know about parkinson's, but the same device is used to treat severe epilepsy.

Re:Similar to Parkinson's? (-1, Offtopic)

Gothmolly (148874) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126252)

Fristage Postage is mine, biatch.

Re:Similar to Parkinson's? (4, Informative)

Rosco P. Coltrane (209368) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126451)

isn't this the same treatment for severe cases of Parkinson's?

No, the device you're thinking of is the thalamic stimulator [wikipedia.org] . It's implanted in the brain, with the patient conscious, and I read somewhere that the results are dramatic, so much so that surgeon looks at the patient's hand, probes on the thalamus with the electrode to find the right spot, and when he finds it, the shaking instantly stops. I hear when the implant is in place and working, the only reminder of Parkinson's disease left is slowness of movements, but no more tremors.

Shockings will continue... (5, Funny)

jarich (733129) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126152)

Shockings will continue until morale improves!

Re:Shockings will continue... (1)

PsychicX (866028) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126219)

It reminds me of the sort of items you inevitably get in games like SW: Knights of the Old Republic. "This implant gives the user repeated neural shocks to reduce the ability to feel pain and to increase motivation, with the net effect of giving +2 to Will Saves."

Re:Shockings will continue... (1)

Alien54 (180860) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126397)

Borrowed from the internet

I keep hearing authorities on public radio applying logic to who and what we are that, if applied to a TV set, might run as follows: Though tradition claims that there is life beyond this TV set, a life that continues after its demise --actual living beings who create these moving pictures, the TV set being only a means of presenting them to others --we know, scientifically, that this cannot be the case. Here is the evidence:

  1. Obviously, nothing of the life you see on a TV set can survive the demise of the TV set. Proof: destroy a TV set. It contains no more life, nor ever will again.
  2. Evidence is mounting that the TV set is the SOURCE of the pictures you see on its screen. They are all created within the "brain" of the TV set. For example, if you sever this wire, the pictures vanish. If you sever THIS one, the picture lose their vertical hold. If you cut THAT one, they lose horizontal hold. If you destroy that part, they fade. If you destroy THAT part, the sound vanishes. And so forth. By disabling one or another component to see what it controls, scientists, daily, are clarifying the ways in which the various parts of the TV set contribute to the creation of its pictures. (Tube or not tube?)
  3. Where sets are faulty (electrical brain imbalances), we can't cure them, but we CAN keep them operating. For example, when we jolt this set by attaching a power line to this part here, we don't get the correct picture back, but notice how the screen flares up, all brilliant white? See? We can keep it happy.

Now imagine this with a computer.

Bah (2)

Umbral Blot (737704) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126161)

I wouldn't trust it. My room/cell mate had one and it didn't seem to do him any good, although his was for treating epilepsy.

I for one... (1, Funny)

laughing rabbit (216615) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126163)

...welcome our new micro-electric shock therapy overlords.

Re:I for one... (0, Redundant)

Procrastin8er (791570) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126373)

Damn you beat me to it.

Oh wow (1, Interesting)

DrMrLordX (559371) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126174)

Imagine if someone with one of these devices stands downwind of the military's (relatively) new microwave riot-control gun. Woooeee. Should be interesting. Of course, I guess that applies to traditional cardiac pacemakers as well. Best not riot, Mr. Cheney.

Re:Oh wow (1)

Verteiron (224042) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126326)

Seeing as how the riot-control beam doesn't penetrate more than skin deep, there shouldn't be a problem unless this uses an external battery pack or something.

Zap, wow that feels good. (1, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126176)

If it cures depression, what is stopping it from doing the opposite. Could this be a new friendly "happy" drug?

What about the rest of us? (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126503)

And why is it only for the severely depressed? Why can't the merely morose get it, too?

How about those of us who have just realized that our lives are going nowhere, but other than that we're mostly ok? Don't we get any shock treatments?

I think it could help a lot of people get from "mostly happy" to "Wow, this is a great time to be alive!"

And I wonder if it runs Linux.

Re:What about the rest of us? (1)

Alex P Keaton in da (882660) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126622)

Will they make one that makes you horny???
Wait... I think I have one of those already.
But I would be down with one that could induce orgasms at the push of a button.... It would make work more fun. I'll ooooooohhhh have oooooooh that ooooohhhhhh report ohhhhhhhh done... done... done... Oh to late....
But maybe this could be a solution, in the long run, to over medication.... We could instead have over- implatation. (not the Pamela Anderson kind)

Re:Zap, wow that feels good. (1)

VATechTigger (884976) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126516)

Same thing that keeps people from abusing Antidepressants. They dont get you high, or super happy. You get fever, twitches, respitory distress etc from to much serotonin AKA "Seratonin Syndrome"

Re:Zap, wow that feels good. (2, Funny)

Rosco P. Coltrane (209368) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126518)

Personally, when I feel down, I remember the old adages: a gramme in time saves nine. Not to mention, a gramme is better than a damn.

Isn't it great to be an epsilon minus? We even have our own dedicated chatboard, Slashdot, to share our experiences.

I want my tasp! (2, Insightful)

darkgumby (647085) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126180)

Wuhoo! Now I can be a wirehead with FDA approval.

Re:I want my tasp! uh Larry Niven reference (1, Interesting)

Fox_1 (128616) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126359)

Wuhoo! Now I can be a wirehead with FDA approval. Why is this Flamebait? My first thought too was of Gil Hamilton's old crew mate's face grinning at him with a wire running from his skull to the wall. Belter tan and all.

Re:I want my tasp! uh Larry Niven reference (1)

Pxtl (151020) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126440)

Good to see fellow Niven fans in here. The corresponding Chrichton vehicle that people keep mentioning sounds like his generic "new technology creates monster that runs around killing people" rather than actually exploring the ramifications.

Re:I want my tasp! uh Larry Niven reference (1)

SatanicPuppy (611928) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126599)

Heh. My first thought was from Douglas Adams:

Having fun: this is the big section. It is impossible to have more fun without electrocuting your pleasure center... --SL&TFATF

Re:I want my tasp! ^H^H^H^H^H droud! (2, Informative)

nyrk (779328) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126497)

Actually the tasp was the remote version of it, so you could "Make someone's day" by remotely You are thinking of a droud.

Definition of wirehead (2, Insightful)

phorm (591458) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126524)

(for whomever labelled this as flamebait)

This is a reference to Niven's universe, I've heard it first mentioned in the book "Flatlander." Basically, a wirehead is somebody who has become a current addict. A hole is drilled into the skull, and a wire inserted into the pleasure center of the brain.

The end result is that the person becomes addicted to the pleasure supplied by the device, worse than a cokehead or heroin addict.

Addiction should be something we should be careful of, we don't need "wireheads" outside of book-worlds.

Sounds like the Happy Helmet! (5, Funny)

XxtraLarGe (551297) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126181)

Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy, Joy!

Re:Sounds like the Happy Helmet! (1)

XxtraLarGe (551297) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126223)

Reference for the previous post [conspiracyinc.com]

Re:Sounds like the Happy Helmet! (4, Informative)

bedroll (806612) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126618)

Hello, boys and girls. This is your old pal, Stinky Wizzleteats..
A better reference [lysator.liu.se] :
Stimpy's Invention

Stimpy invents lots of silly things and has Ren try them out. Ren is not happy with these inventions, so Stimpy makes a "Happy Helmet" to make sure Ren is never unhappy again. The result is even more psychotic than "Space Madness." Includes the now-famous "Happy Happy Joy Joy" song.

Depression!?! (1)

Karma_fucker_sucker (898393) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126183)

Fuck that! I want something that keeps me feeling real good! Also, I want somethint that make me hyper -productive so I can make a $1,000,000/ week for a month or two so that I can retire next year!

Mr. Huxley, here I come!

Spelling (1)

Karma_fucker_sucker (898393) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126286)

Of course, my spelling would really go to shit on that thing!

just imagine... (5, Funny)

Paladin144 (676391) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126195)

Just imagine if you got one of these things implanted in your brain and it didn't work at all - that would be extremely depressing. :-)

Re:just imagine... (1)

linzeal (197905) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126362)

That is why they should legalize heroin and marijuana so you can make anyone happy.

Terminal Man (1, Redundant)

Evil Adrian (253301) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126197)

Michael Crichton sort of covered this in his book Terminal Man... the guy gets electrical current run into his brain when he starts getting blacking out and becoming violent...

Great book. Read it.

Re:Terminal Man (1)

Omg Kthxbye (898058) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126254)

YES! You beat me to it! Excellent book, as are all of his others. I thought of the book immediately when I read this story.

and of course the obligatory (2, Funny)

Victor Tramp (5336) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126199)

*BZZT*

Vagus baby, YEAA!!

Why not hook up something to the brain implant? (1)

RedLaggedTeut (216304) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126202)

Why not hook up another sense to the brain implant instead of random impulses?

How about sonar or ultraviolet vision? Or hooking up an internet connection :-)

Re:Why not hook up something to the brain implant? (2, Informative)

Andronoid (816502) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126481)

Because randomly stimulating a single nerve tract to cause the release of neuro -ransmitters is easy while the more precise stimulation needed for perception is very hard (and almost not at all understood). For those unfamiliar with neuro-anatomy the vagus nerve goes throughout the body and (primarily) picks up signals on heart rate etc. that are associate with an increased level of arousal. This nerve projects (again primarily) to the amygdala the brains "emotional center" so your brain knows your scared, excited, elated or any other state of high arousal (because often your body reacts before your brain does, altough this is a simplistic explanation) So all this device seems to do is cause a higher level of arousal. It doesn't seem to do much more than current drugs already do, except maybe that the level of control is more precise than just popping a pill.

*sigh* (3, Funny)

mE123 (140419) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126203)

I'm sure there is something snappy I could say here... but I'm really not in to it today...

I think I'm going to go back to bed

What could possibly go wrong with this? (2, Interesting)

Mister Transistor (259842) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126213)

For the answer, read or watch Michael Crichton's "The Terminal Man". One of his better stories, from about 30 years ago.

Re:What could possibly go wrong with this? (2, Informative)

Pxtl (151020) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126297)

Niven played with this concept a lot too, it appears in an extreme form in many of his novels and short stories. For example, in the Gil Hamilton detective stories, a man is killed by being hooked up to such an ecstacy device through a cord too short to allow him to reach the kitchen, so he starves to death rather than disconnect the device (much of the story debates whether or not this was a suicide).

Personally, I like Niven's writing better than Crichton's.

Re:What could possibly go wrong with this? (1)

Enigma_Man (756516) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126394)

Ditto here on the Niven vs. Crichton, but Crichton's Terminal-Man was a really good read nonetheless.

-Jesse

Happy Hat is real? (1)

amigabill (146897) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126214)

So, the Happy Hat from Ren & Stimpy has finally left the cartoon world? Cool!

Re:Happy Hat is real? (1)

Quiet_Desperation (858215) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126555)

You sick little monkey!

Ah, good times. :)

Welcome to the Monkey House (1, Informative)

jdehnert (84375) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126217)

Can you say Harrison Bergeron? I though you could.

Re:Welcome to the Monkey House (1)

rsborg (111459) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126483)

Can you say Harrison Bergeron? I though you could.

The Handicapper General would like to remind you of your required "equality" education [westvalley.edu] ...

Re:Welcome to the Monkey House (2, Interesting)

TrippTDF (513419) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126634)

I kinda agree with you here.

I'm a depressed person. While I've not been officially diagnosed, I think the recent suicide attempts have proven that.

Now, I don't fucking want help. I rather like being this far below the average person. It's easier down here. No one understands that, and I'm expected to "get better" so that my friends and family will "feel better" about me.

Why does depression have to be cured?

Augmentation (1)

Tekgno (321071) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126221)

So how long will it be until we start seeing products that augment perfectly healthy individuals?

athletes and soldiers (1)

peter303 (12292) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126417)

Competative athletes and the military will try new drugs, bioelectronics, therapies etc. that will give them an edge. Cost and side-effects are minor concerns.

Re:Augmentation (1)

Verteiron (224042) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126447)

Hard to say how long, but this WILL happen. As soon as one country begins to do it, others will have to follow just to keep up. Best we learn how to deal with it now.

The Terminal Man? (0, Redundant)

VanillaBabies (829417) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126226)

Wasn't there a Michael Crichton book based on a similar premise? Except in the book he learned to control and then started killing people?

All i'm saying is truth is stranger than fiction, and i don't want to be around when the killing starts.

In Addition to the Electrodes (1)

techsoldaten (309296) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126245)

This is a new version of a much older device.

The mjor obstalce scientists have been able to overcome is, when you turn the knob up to 4, you do not experience the symptoms of butt frenzy commonly associated with earlier versions of the device.

M

Excuse me, sir? (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126556)

Excuse me, sir, but did you just say butt frenzy?

Louis Wu, where are you (1)

wbtittle (456702) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126249)

This sounds oddly like Ring World Engineers.

Electric current to the pleasure center of the brain....

Let the addictions begin.

Hack it and keep high forever (5, Insightful)

guildsolutions (707603) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126250)

I wonder how hackable they would be to send 'pleasure' signals... Kinda like a star trekkie thing that keeps your brain in extacy for hours upon hours... That would be the life... who cares about money after that implant.

Seriously, Depression is a dissease that affects almost everyone at some point in our lives. Those who cant be helped with alternative methods could serously benefit from such. Whats needed now is a way to determine if someone is clinincally depressed even if they are denying it. This might have pain and suffering of a local 13 year old who tried to take his own life last winter, but only succeded in making himself worse off.

St John's Wort (0)

Moderation abuser (184013) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126256)

Used for hundreds of years, medically proven to act as anti-anxiety/anti-depressant, the active components being Hypericin/Hyperforin.

Re:St John's Wort (1)

CockblockTheVote (849450) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126545)

but St Johns Wort is natural, and can't be patented. so there is no money in it. other than the obnoxious prices for supplements... why use what nature made when you can create something new, that may have drastic side effects. personally, when i see the drug ads on tv, and they list the side effects, i would rather deal with heartburn than have my sex life go down or suffer from explosive diarria.

Not for everybody (2, Informative)

DisasterDoctor (775095) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126259)

Please remember that the FDA has approved this device only for treatment-resistant depression. This is not first line therapy.

I've been stimulating my gf's vagus nerve for... (1, Offtopic)

GojiraDeMonstah (588432) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126272)

a while now, and it seems to help keep her from being depressed.

Not Terminal Man... (1)

Magnusite (526038) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126282)

Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?

Dial in your own emotions.

Instead of electric shocks (1)

zymano (581466) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126296)

How about a tube with drugs flowing directly to to the spot that controls depression.

Sidenote-Believe it or not,read in the paper that people that drink alot coffee have less depression. Not sure on this. I only remember it vaguely.

Daddy needs his medicine... (1)

TheStonepedo (885845) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126298)

Do you have to try the gateway drugs first or can you skip right to the good stuff?

"I feel horrible. I need a shock bad. Come on, gimme that shock, doc."

pretty skeptical (1)

soma_0806 (893202) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126307)

I know someone that has gone through traditional electroshock twice and there seems to be very little positive effect when weighed against the side effects. He lost a lot of his memory and right after treatment would commonly get caught in little loops (telling the same joke, story, etc. over and over).

The only good thing is that he would mildly stabilize a few weeks after treatment and the effects would seem to subside (right in time for another round, incidentally). However, if these shocks were continual, then the side effects may be too, rendering it pretty useless.

AC

don't they listen to tom cruise (1)

Surt (22457) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126315)

Depression isn't due to problems in the brain!

The end of Social Justice? (2, Interesting)

LionKimbro (200000) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126323)

Theory: Many instances of depression are due to social injustice, apathy, the slow pace at which society reforms itself. [philosophicalsociety.com]

Concern: If we drug or electrically stimulate ourselves to keep ourselves happy, social progress comes to a halt. We feel good about ourselves, even though horrible things happen around us.

Here is a bibliography kept by AdBusters. [adbusters.org] I'm not sure how reliable a bibliography kept by AdBusters is, but these are things that we should be thinking about, and research that we should at least consider.

Can you imagine... (1)

Miros (734652) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126325)

Can you imagine what the commercials for this thing will be like? "Ever feel like there was something wrong with you? Well, we agree, and we have the answer. The device is simply installed in your brain, then your depression will evaporate. Common side effects include reading 1984 in a whole new light, extreme paranoia, and headaches."

What Would Tom Say? (1)

mcmediaman (900722) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126330)

I wonder what Tom Cruise thinks about this....

Phew... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126332)

Am I the only person who read that as

vague nerve stimulator?

Lucrative side business?... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126334)

now, does this or does this not sound like the beginning of techno-narcotics?

"plug me in man, i need my fix" :P

Features? (1)

pablonhd (797579) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126336)

USB?
Firewire?
SD Reader?

Oh the possibilities!

The vagus nerve (from wikipedia) (4, Informative)

Frangible (881728) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126354)

The vagus nerve is tenth of twelve paired cranial nerves and is the only nerve that starts in the brainstem (somewhere in the medulla oblongata) and extends all the way down past the head, right down to the abdomen. The vagus nerve is arguably the single most important nerve in the body.

The medieval Latin word vagus means literally "wandering" (the words "vagrant", "vagabond", and "vague" come from the same root).

This nerve supplies motor and sensory parasympathetic fibres to pretty much everything from the neck down to the first third of the transverse colon. In this capacity, it is involved in, amongst other things, such varied tasks as heart rate, gastrointestinal peristalsis, sweating and speech (via the recurrent laryngeal nerve).

The vagus also controls a few skeletal muscles, namely:

* levator veli palatini muscle
* salpingopharyngeus muscle
* stylopharyngeus muscle
* palatoglossus muscle
* palatopharyngeus muscle
* superior, middle and inferior pharyngeal constrictors
* muscles of the larynx (speech).

This means that the vagus nerve is responsible for quite a few muscle movements in the mouth and also is vitally important for speech and in keeping the larynx open for breathing.

It also receives some sensation from the outer ear and part of the meninges.

The vagus nerve and the heart

Parasympathetic innervation of the heart is mediated by the vagus nerve. The right vagus innervates the SA node. Parasympathetic hyperstimulation predisposes those affected to bradyarrhythmias. The left vagus when hyperstimulated predisposes the heart to AV blocks.

Oh Yeah! (5, Funny)

MightyMartian (840721) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126360)

I'm really feeling down. I just don't know how long I can ZOT! Hey, I'm ready to rock and roll! I think I'll become president of the world! But that would mean having to find an apartment in a big city, and I wouldn't see my wife and kids very much, and I probably wouldn't get to watch reruns of Enterprise. Gawd, they cancelled Enterprise, I can't believe it, no more Star Trek, that's it I'm going to open this window and ZOT! Hey, good riddance, goddamn Enterprise, crappy acting, crappy stories, thank goodness there's Battlestar Galactica. Much better writing, interesting stories. And there's Doctor Who too. Great remake. But Christopher Eccleston isn't coming back for the second season. It'll fail for sure, then I won't have anything to watch and I'll sit in this apartment reading Slashdot crap on my computer. How can I deal with this? I think I'll tie rocks to my shoes and ZOT! Hey! That's okay, I've always got Slashdot. Maybe I'll get moded +48183 Insightful for this post, become King of Slashdot and supplant CmdrTaco! Oh, but then people will mock me, and call me a shill, and claim I do nothing but post dupes. I can't stand that. I'd rather ZOT! ZOT! ZOT! ZOT! ZOT!

Re:Oh Yeah! (2, Funny)

Guppy06 (410832) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126552)

Kneel before Zot?

Yet nore things treated with electro shocks (1)

Hachey (809077) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126370)

Wow, I can't believe how many things people are constantly willing to throw electro shocks at.

Hmmm, we've tried everything else...well, lets just trying zapping the living crap out of it and see if that helps!


--
Check out the Uncyclopedia.org [uncyclopedia.org] :
The only wiki source for politically incorrect non-information about things like Kitten Huffing [uncyclopedia.org] and Pong! the Movie [uncyclopedia.org] !

IN OTHER NEWS... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126384)

Researchers have found that pain caused by electric shocks momentarily causes the depressed to forget about their depression.

vague nerve stimulator ? (1)

Potatomasher (798018) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126399)

"The Food and Drug Administration's clearance opens Cyberonics Inc.'s vagus nerve stimulator, "

First read that line as "vague nerve stimulator" and thought to myself "Wow ! The FDA's approving something without really knowing what it does ?!" Wouldn't be the first time i guess ;)

Re:vague nerve stimulator ? (1)

Desert Raven (52125) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126501)

First read that line as "vague nerve stimulator" and thought to myself "Wow ! The FDA's approving something without really knowing what it does ?!" Wouldn't be the first time i guess ;)

You may have read the words wrong, but you got the correct meaning.

The FDA *doesn't* really know what it does, or if it works. They really just don't seem to give a damn about properly validating treatments for mental disorders.

Heheheh (1)

VectorSC (721025) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126407)

I see this, and all I can think is: "Blue Screen of Death."

I was a little concerned... (1)

Shadow Wrought (586631) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126412)

When I saw it was being produced by a branch of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation.

Cyberonics, Inc. are punk rockers (1)

Recovering Hater (833107) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126418)

because this was obviously inspired by:
Gimme Gimme Shock Treatment
I was feeling sick I was loosing my mind I heard about these treatments From a good friend of mine He was always happy Smile on his face He said he had a great time at the place. Gimme gimme shock treatment. Peace and love is here to stay And now I can wake up and face the day Happy happy happy all the time Shock treatment, I'm doing fine. The Ramones Rock on Cyberonics!

Bah...it's all Pseudo-science! (1)

bwcarty (660606) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126428)

I refuse to get any electrodes in my brain until Tom Cruise says it's ok.

Brief Terminal Man Review (1)

mikes.song (830361) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126439)

Man gets ecliptic seizure.
Seizure triggers feel-good electricty in brain.
Mans body likes feel-good electricty, and then the body stops the seizures.
Feel-good electricty stops
Man gets ecliptic seizure.
Seizure triggers feel-good electricty in brain.
Mans body likes feel-good electricty, and then the body stops the seizures.
Mans body learns that shaking causes feel-good juice.
Body shakes more.
Body feels good more.
Man starts to rage like he's on PCP.

Now, what could happen
Man gets depressed.
Depression triggers feel-good electricty in brain.
Mans body likes feel-good electricty, and then the body stops feeling bad.
Feel-good electricty stops
Man gets depressed.
Depression triggers feel-good electricty in brain.
Mans body likes feel-good electricty, and then the body stops feeling depressed.
Mans body learns that depression causes feel-good juice.
Man gets sad more.
Body feels good more.
Man starts to rage like he's bi-polor and on PCP.

New Treatment for Depression (1, Funny)

Kyru (836008) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126443)

Brilliant new treatment for depression: Get Over It! World sucks, things aren't how you'd like them to be: Get Over It! Girlfriend dumped ya, sleeping with your best friend: Get Over It! Apparently living in a modern world means you get depressed a lot, but with my simple plan you just look past the crap and say 'eh, whatever' and Get Over It!

On entering the airplane (1)

jurt1235 (834677) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126453)

Please turn off all electronic devices for take off (and then plunge straight into your depression)

Yes! (1)

Quiet_Desperation (858215) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126460)

I'll take a dozen, please!

Oh no! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126473)

I hope these new devices aren't running a Windows based operating system like some BMWs I know. Just think what happens when it blue screens!

Coocoo (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126496)

But Nurse Ratchett, I don't want another treatment!

I'm afraid... (1)

robyannetta (820243) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126505)

When these new devices error, they'll be a lot of emotionally challenged people muttering the name Sarah Connor.

Instead of FUD... (4, Informative)

Jurph (16396) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126527)

How about some more factual information? NPR [npr.org] has done several [npr.org] stories [npr.org] on this kind of treatment, and how it is (and isn't) used. This is not "rats push the button to feel good". This treatment involves a very precise electrical impulse delivered to the malfunctioning area of the brain; it is to electro-shock therapy what a bonsai knife is to a lawnmower, so the side effects, while not well-characterized, are likely to be orders of magnitude less intrusive.

It's used in cases where the depression is not treatable with current drugs. These are people who are so seriously neurochemically depressed that suicide seems attractive for the relief it would offer. The best we could give them before was a hug and a doctor mumbling that they were "interesting," until eventually they gave up and killed themselves. Now we can offer them this, which has at least one major advantage over suicide.

Wasn't shock therapy banned? [nt] (1)

mark-t (151149) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126540)

[nt]

Tom Cruise (1)

Casca (4032) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126561)

How soon before we can get one of these implanted into Maverick's brain?

SP1? (1)

Corson (746347) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126567)

So, when is that Service Pack due again? :)

Treatment of symptoms (1)

Icarus1919 (802533) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126577)

Psychology and neroscience are still unsure whether chemical imbalances and faulty electrical signaling are the causes or symptoms of depression. Therefore I'm sure that many people in the medical community consider this a treatment of the symptoms of depression rather than the underlying causes.

This treatment would be akin to getting rid of someone's cough and runny nose and then saying the cold was cured. You haven't cured the cold, you've just stopped the visible symptoms of it.

Linux Mod- crack (1)

spaztech (899194) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126578)

How long until someone mods it to run Linux? This would also add a whole new meaning to the term 0wn3D!!

I can't believe this! (1, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126593)

Why is medicine so uninternested in treating the cause? Cause they can't make money. And it is all about money.

Check this out: http://www.eeginfo.com/ [eeginfo.com]
This stuff might sould a little quacky, but it works and it works very well. And you don't need to cut into the brain to fix the brain. Look a little searching on labotimies and see what a disaster that was.

Louis Wu Redux. (1)

torpor (458) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126594)


yo, wirehead, get me some coffee..

boink!

good slave. have a femto-second of pure pleasure.

It's safe and confidential treatment (2, Funny)

Quiet_Desperation (858215) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126603)

Because what happens in vagus stays in vagus.

Fr15t stop (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 9 years ago | (#13126609)

others what to a way to spend Handy, you are free is EFNet, and you lagged behind, THE ACCOUNTING free-loving climOate for all practical sure that by the short of a miracle

personal experince (1)

rctay (718547) | more than 9 years ago | (#13126620)

I've suffered from major depression for 15 years. I'm one of the roughly 30% that are non-responsive to SSRI's. ECT can require up to 2 weeks hospitalization while you are treated 5 or 6 times. It's a confusing period with large memory gaps that may return over time. It's a crap shoot. Some patience require re-treatment after 6 months, some it never helps and memory loss can be permeant. The thing about VNS is early studies indicate success in the 30% range, and that can takes months. Many of those reporting success rate it as moderate. I would have to pay out of pocket for this device, $25,000, plus regular adjustments. Insurance companies aren't touching this for depression now.
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