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New "Hairy Lobster" Crustacean Discovered and Classified

ScuttleMonkey posted more than 8 years ago | from the cuddly-fuzzy-dinner dept.

261

AviLazar writes "American-led divers discovered a new type of Crustacean, that resembles a lobster but has it's claws covered in 'sinuous, hair-like strands'. This species is so different, from other Crustacean's that it was classified with a new Family name: Kiwaida. Unfortunately for the Kiwaida, the AP is already using this blind creature and a salad plate in the same sentence."

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261 comments

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Ick, but... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876464)

Sinuous hair-like strands? Those don't sound tasty at all. But I'm willing to eat it anyway.

Re:Ick, but... (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876600)

Sinuous hair-like strands? Those don't sound tasty at all. But I'm willing to eat it anyway.

You must be asian?

Re:Ick, but... (1)

Mahou (873114) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876756)

mutant lobster, named kiwaida?

sounds like something that would attack tokyo

just what i need (3, Funny)

gEvil (beta) (945888) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876478)

Great, now I get to pick hairs out of my teeth when I eat this, too?

Re:just what i need (4, Funny)

Phaed (953768) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876651)

Oh quit being shellfish - some people like the experience.

But seriously... what else are you eating that causes hairs to get stuck in your teeth?

Re:just what i need (1, Redundant)

WetSpot (874382) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876690)

Q: What's the last sound you hear before a pubic hair hits the ground? A: phhht

Re:just what i need (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14877089)

>But seriously... what else are you eating that causes hairs to get stuck in your teeth?

McDonalds cheeseburgers

Re:just what i need (5, Funny)

ForwardThinker (958647) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876714)

I heard they also found a new type of hairy lobster off the brazilian coast ... but it only had a thin strip of hair down the middle!

Re:just what i need (0)

Quintios (594318) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876733)

You mean the "Mohawk" lobster? aka The "Mr. T on the side".

Re:just what i need (3, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876754)

Researchers have also noted that it smells like fish, tastes like chicken, and is related to the bearded clam.

Obviously (5, Funny)

RealProgrammer (723725) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876810)

you must have remarkably poor technique.

The edible parts are hairless.

hairy lobster (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876479)

wtf is this kind of porn doing on slashdot?

The important question is (5, Funny)

semiotec (948062) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876486)

what do they taste like?

Re:The important question is (1)

Bai jie (653604) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876526)

Like chicken of course!

Re:The important question is (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876530)

From the article: "The animal is white and 15 centimeters (5.9 inches) long -- about the size of a salad plate."

I imagine they taste pretty darn good since they've obviously been intelligently designed as a salad course.

Re:The important question is (2, Funny)

Walkiry (698192) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876541)

Hehe, Ned Land would be proud ;-)

Re:The important question is (1)

kidgenius (704962) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876603)

It is interesting in the article where it mentions that this lobster is "the size of a salad plate". Makes you wonder if the divers are contemplating the same thing you are.

what do they taste like? (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876658)

Paris Hilton.

Hairy Lobster? (4, Funny)

vwjeff (709903) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876492)

I've heard of a hairy clam but never a hairy lobster.

Re:Hairy Lobster? (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876510)

Don't you mean a bearded clam?

Re:Hairy Lobster? (4, Funny)

winkydink (650484) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876623)

Finally, an honest slahsdotter who admits to hearing about a hairy (bearded) clam, but not seeing one. :)

Re:Hairy Lobster? (-1, Redundant)

Alex P Keaton in da (882660) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876765)

The bearded clam jokes are great, but why no hairy palm jokes?

A Brief Timeline of the Lobster in America. (1)

selfdiscipline (317559) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876951)

Oh, come now... has noone read "The Areas of my Expertise" [areasofmyexpertise.com] ?

Ya'll are missing out.

Even better link (1)

selfdiscipline (317559) | more than 8 years ago | (#14877020)

In fact, I seem to remember [slashdot.org] a certain book review that may be of aid to you unenlightened masses.

Re:Hairy Lobster? (1)

drgonzo59 (747139) | more than 8 years ago | (#14877054)

This one bites if you reach for it.

"Furry" lobster? (4, Funny)

ninja_pirate (893242) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876493)

So now furries will be dressing up as this? *shudders*

Re:"Furry" lobster? (1)

Khyber (864651) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876607)

I'd sure as hell hope not. Furry pr0n is bad enough as it is, I don't want to run across something that looks like a lobster getting boinked by a coyote while the lobster is being vored on the next somethingawful forum post.

Re:"Furry" lobster? (3, Funny)

bersl2 (689221) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876859)

The fact that I instantly thought of a picture near your description means that I have seen entirely too much furry pr0n.

(NOT SAFE FOR WORK! DON'T BLAME ME IF YOU WANT TO GOUGE YOUR EYES OUT AFTERWARDS!) [vclart.net]

I know I've seen other experimental works (i.e., having non-mammalian, non-avian, non-reptilian subjects), and let me tell you, the ones with insects are worse. :)

Apostrophe alert! (-1, Troll)

paiute (550198) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876503)

Dud'e! Ton'e dow'n you're i'll punctuation's. Its like wrong.

Re:Apostrophe alert! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876599)

I like this lobster. Its a furry creature with hair all over it's claws!

-- gid

The real question is... (2, Funny)

robyannetta (820243) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876513)

With or without butter?

Re:The real question is... (0)

soft_guy (534437) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876755)

I'm going to complain to PETA - People Eating Tasty Animals. My complaint is why haven't I had this for dinner already.

Why hairy? (5, Funny)

Angostura (703910) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876521)

This raises obvious questions about the value of the 'hairs'.

Given that it is blind, I suppose they may be tactile, like a cat's whiskers.

Or perhaps detritous gets stuck in the hairs and it is a rudimentary filter feeder.

Or perhaps most lobsters shave regularly, but since this one's blind... nah.

Re:Why hairy? (2, Interesting)

jhines (82154) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876617)

From the BBC article another user posted, the hairs house lots of filter bacteria which make the toxic mineral vent water paleteable.

Re:Why hairy? (1)

sunwukong (412560) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876681)

Or maybe they're somewhat "sensitive" about the normal lack of hair and have taken action [ibiblio.org] to alleviate the situation.

Genes Still Evolving (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876523)

Yip, Blondes are evolving [slashdot.org]

Radation ? (1)

wrackley (239709) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876726)

Is this some freak result of the nuclear testing done by the US in this area in the 50s?

Hairs (4, Interesting)

Billosaur (927319) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876531)

The "hairs" are probably not what we think of as hair, but probably serve as some kind of sensory system, to detect the movement of currents or perhaps the movement of prey nearby, since according to the article: "It's also blind. The researchers found it had only 'the vestige of a membrane' in place of eyes, Segonzac said."

Re:Hairs (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876574)

Is this a natural occurrence, or is it a failed /successful experiment?
An indicator of things to come?

Re:Hairs (2, Interesting)

Spectre (1685) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876660)

Apparently the Intelligent Designer that came up with the "eye that could not possibly have randomly evolved" forgot about this beastie.

Re:Hairs (1)

hotdiggitydawg (881316) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876837)

No no - this is evolution in action! Finally a seafood species that comes complete with dental-floss!

Learn to spell "its", moron. (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876535)

Spelling matters. Did you graduate from grade school?

Ancient Geek mythology. (2)

Itninja (937614) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876539)

"The family was named Kiwaida, from Kiwa, the goddess of crustaceans in Polynesian mythology."

Polynesian crustaceans get their own goddess? That's pretty flippin' sweet!
And as a sidenote, that lobster resembles a hairy dustmite.

Bigger pic (4, Informative)

StonedRat (837378) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876544)

There's a bigger pic on bbc, reminds me of the big hug from the soup adverts.

Pic [bbc.co.uk]
Article [bbc.co.uk]

Re:Bigger pic (1)

steelfood (895457) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876843)

Is it just me, or does it bear uncanny resemblance to a tick [lawestvector.org] except much bigger and with two giant pincers in the front?

Looks great... (5, Funny)

tengennewseditor (949731) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876545)

I want one of those to hang on my rear view mirror.

Jack Handey (4, Funny)

RobotWisdom (25776) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876551)

"People laugh when I say that I think a jellyfish is one of the most beautiful things in the world. What they don't understand is, I mean a jellyfish with long, blonde hair."

Re:Jack Handey (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876831)


Hey Jorn, did you hear Chris McKinstry killed himself in January?
No loss, really, just wondering if you heard.

Evolution at work (4, Insightful)

Aging_Newbie (16932) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876565)

The hair, while surprising, is not if you consider that it could just be a sensory organ [nih.gov] . Note how evolution deprecated the critter's eyes since the hairs would probably be more effective in the 7500 foot depth where it lives. Once in a while it is nice to see that there are still things to be discovered.

But it wasnt a rock- (-1, Offtopic)

JANYAtty. (678934) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876586)

It was a rock, lobster! From the B-52's:
His ear lobe fell in the deep
Someone reached in and grabbed it
It was a rock lobster
We were at the beach
Everybody had matching towels
Somebody went under a dock
And there they saw a rock
It wasn't a rock
It was a rock lobster
Motion in the ocean
His air hose broke
Lots of trouble
Lots of bubble
He was in a jam
S'in a giant clam
Down, down
Underneath the waves
Mermaids wavin'
Wavin' to mermen
Wavin' sea fans
Sea horses sailin'
Dolphins wailin'
Red snappers snappin'
Clam shells clappin'
Muscles flexin'
Flippers flippin'
Down, down
Let's rock!
Boy's in bikinis
Girls in surfboards
Everybody's rockin'
Everybody's fruggin'
Twistin' 'round the fire
Havin' fun
Bakin' potatoes
Bakin' in the sun
Put on your noseguard
Put on the lifeguard
Pass the tanning butter
Here comes a stingray
There goes a manta-ray
In walked a jelly fish
There goes a dogfish
Chased by a catfish
In flew a sea robin
Watch out for that piranha
There goes a narwhale
HERE COMES A BIKINI WHALE!

Standard Units of Measure (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876601)

Since when was a salad plate a unit of measure?

Re:Standard Units of Measure (5, Funny)

qwijibo (101731) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876764)

It's a reference point that suggests that this scientific discovery is more of an appetizer than a full meal. Even scientists are humans first. That means when we discover something new, we have to give it a location on the food chain.

Re:Standard Units of Measure (4, Funny)

jeblucas (560748) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876914)

Oh, my... you are correct sir. Let's send a letter to the editor.

In Re: Salad Plate dimension.

I read your recent hirsute lobster tale (pun very much intended) recently and was flummoxed by your use of "salad plate" as a measure of what I'm guessing is area. Could you please restate the size in dimensions your readership could understand? Perhaps football fields, breadboxes, or tons of TNT?

Thank you humbly,
A.Coward, Esq.

Re:Standard Units of Measure (1)

backwardMechanic (959818) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876916)

Isn't that one of NASAs prefered units?

Re:Standard Units of Measure (1)

dosquatch (924618) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876920)

Since when was a salad plate a unit of measure?

The story is from AP France, after all. Why wouldn't their unit of measure take serving size into account?

Re:Standard Units of Measure (1)

merlin_jim (302773) | more than 8 years ago | (#14877097)

Since when was a salad plate a unit of measure?

They adopted it at the same time that Libraries of Congress became the standard UOM for data files...

ALL HAIL! (0, Offtopic)

Klowner (145731) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876605)

All Hail Whitey the Gorilla Lobstarrrr!

Re: Obligitory.... (1)

burnt_cajun_toast (766392) | more than 8 years ago | (#14877022)

I for one welcome our new Hairy Crustacean Overlords!

Classify it? (4, Funny)

pulse2600 (625694) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876609)

Don't just classify it, provide a recipe too!

Geez... (1)

ChePibe (882378) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876614)

I know they've been doing a lot of reclassifying [slashdot.org] lately, but must we really classify the existence of these lobsters?

I kid, I kid...

American-led divers ... (0, Troll)

whereisaxlrose (898923) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876634)

I like how it was actually discovered by a french scientist and the specie is now in Paris ... but the news says "American-led divers" ... patriotism...... not fetch. biased ? sike.

Re:American-led divers ... (4, Funny)

nblender (741424) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876682)

It _was_ a French scientist who discovered it but then he immediately surrendered to it and it took the arrival of an American scientist to capture it and haul it back for interrogation whereupon it was immediately killed. Rumsfeld disavows all knowledge of this but promises to launch a full investigation.

Besides... (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876829)

... Cheney shot the French Scientist.

New Taxonomy (5, Funny)

cparisi (136611) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876645)

Here is the new Taxonomy order:

Domain
Kingdom
Phylum
Class
Order
Family
Genus
Species
Yummy-ness!

Re:New Taxonomy (3, Funny)

demonbug (309515) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876861)

I think you have it a bit out of order. At least for me, yummy-ness clearly comes before Order.

New Celeb Fashion Accessory.. (1)

modi123 (750470) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876655)


Move over toy dogs (yeah, Doodles, Puggles, and the like I am talking to you), we have a new winner for fashion accessories - the hairy lobster! I am going to start selling tote bags, bejeweled clothing, and of course blinged-out cooking ware! Now when Ms. Paris Hilton's pet dies she can consume it instead of burying it in her backyard's mass grave.

---
Obligatory crack:
Joan Rivers: Oh, look who's coming down the red carpet. It's Paris! Oh, oh, she brought her new pet Mr. BoJangles - her bearded clam!
Ryan Seacrest: Ahm, Joan... if the internet or E! has taught me anything, it is Paris's clam is NEVER bearded. Always shaved for a good shot. I think that is her furry lobster.

Waiter, there's a hair in my Lobster... (2, Funny)

digitaldc (879047) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876659)

...and I wish to complain to the chef about this disgusting meal!

Waiter: I'm afraid you'll have to wait, sir. He's just gone out for his dinner.

i can see it already (1)

moochfish (822730) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876665)

Waiter! There's a hair in my lobster bisque soup!!

I know what Dr Zoidberg has been up to (5, Funny)

MooseTick (895855) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876670)

My mother was right! It will make hair grow on your hands.

Re:I know what Dr Zoidberg has been up to (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876930)

and you'll go blind ...

New product from ID (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876694)

This is clear evidence of the ongoing developement process from the Intelligent Designer.
These things can't just appear to the world on their own!

fuck a 3um (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876702)

about outside Much organisation, (7700+1400+700)*4 Arseholes at walnut if I remain and, after initial [klerck.org]? About 700 users I ever did. It same worthless

the squatter (4, Informative)

ExE122 (954104) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876706)

Scientists said the animal, which they named Kiwa hirsuta, was so distinct from other species that they created a new family and genus for it.

These scientists obviously don't know squat! [divetrip.com]

After a lifetime of hoping... (4, Funny)

Rob T Firefly (844560) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876722)

Finally! A crustacean I can hug!!!

Thank God (4, Funny)

kukickface (675936) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876743)

At first I misread the title as: "New 'Hairy Lobster' Crustacean Discovered in Classifieds"

I now feel safe enough to creepily browse myspace again...

It's quite obvious what happened... (4, Funny)

gfxguy (98788) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876745)

An albino tarantula raped a lobster as it was scavenging near shore.

Is it tasty though? (5, Interesting)

linzeal (197905) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876779)

A lot of deep sea creatures have ammonia in them for anti-freeze and are not very tasty.

Re:Is it tasty though? (4, Informative)

polymath69 (94161) | more than 8 years ago | (#14877015)

A lot of deep sea creatures have ammonia in them for anti-freeze

Not saying you're wrong, but why would they? It doesn't make sense. After all, the pressure at depth stops the water from freezing, and so would automatically do the same for any creatures adapted to that environment. Chemical antifreeze would only be required for near-surface beasties, where the pressure isn't there to do the job.

What I'm wondering is what the hairs do when moulting: do they stay with the old shell, or pull through leaving sieve-like holes? The latter would seem to be extraordinarily difficult.

Ick (1)

Mad Ogre (564694) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876781)

Looks like a tick or a chigger... some sort of big Godzilla-like lice.

Re:Ick (1)

TheCarp (96830) | more than 8 years ago | (#14877045)

Itg doesn't look anything like a cigger. The outside is far too white, and when was the last time you saw a chigger with blond hair?

Nope the chiggers I know tend to have light brown skin, and black hair. Not to mention, not so amazingly hairy about the arms either.

-Steve

overload! (1, Funny)

Syberghost (10557) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876788)

Too... many... jokes... can't... pick... one...

(head asplodes)

Freakin apostraphe's! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876791)

This species is so different, from other Crustacean's

From other crustacean's .... what!? Spit it out man! And why is Crustacean capitalized?

Awesome! (1)

ursabear (818651) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876812)

From TFA, The researchers said that while legions of new ocean species are discovered each year, it is quite rare to find one that merits a new family. - That's great. However, I don't think I'll be lining up to get one at my local sushi bar... Also, I don't think I'd invite it over for drinks or anything - it is actually kind of scary looking

It would be interesting to find out if this particular creature is strictly zoned, or is at many different levels in other parts of the world.

Science harkens, "hither!"

Wait a minute (5, Funny)

tunedfeeders (959821) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876815)

I thought "Hairy Lobster" was the upcoming Ubuntu release...

Is that like a hairy palm? (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14876816)

Beats me.

Journal link (1)

brian0918 (638904) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876818)

The journal mentioned in the BBC article is Zoosystema [www.mnhn.fr] , although they don't appear to have their most recent copy online.

This HAS to STOP NOW (1)

MajorDick (735308) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876853)

The Department of homeland Security has been CLASSIFYING and RE-CLASSIFYING EVERYHTING it can gets its hands on !!!!!

Now even a Crustaction is being CLASSIFIED.....................

Oh wait my bad.....

Bush classified it? (0, Offtopic)

joecm (16636) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876857)

Maybe I am just getting used to this "new world" we live in, but I read that as if the US government classified this as some sort of state secret. Who knows, this new hairy lobster might be key to winning the war on terrorism, or know the location of a secret underwater Iraqi WMD project.

Hodgman (and Coulton) predicted this (1)

Sabaki (531686) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876889)

The Furry Old Lobster [jonathancoulton.com] already has a song about him, even.

Long Lost Brother (1)

MadBurner (607889) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876900)

I am the lobster! Ko Ko Kachoo.

hairy lobster.. so what.. (1)

BillGod (639198) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876907)

I discovered a hairy flounder last night. I have also stumbled across a bearded clam on many occasions.

Great! But, the family name is incorrect. (1)

Assassin bug (835070) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876909)

The classification for lobster goes something like: Arthropoda;Crustacea;Decopoda (for phylum, class, and order, respectively). All family names of all animals on the planet end in -idae. Therefore, the family name of "Kiwaida" is incorrect and should be "Kiwaidae". However, it is also possible that a new family wasn't named but a new suborder or order -- in this case the spelling would be correct. The AP has multiplied an apparent mispelling around the world at lightning speed, congratulations!

Rock Lobster (1)

AndreiK (908718) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876918)

It wasn't a rock, it was a mossy lobster!

Blonde Hair (5, Funny)

MECC (8478) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876932)

So blondes aren't going extinct [nbc10.com] after all - they're just just mutating into a more intelligent form.

Misleading subject (2, Funny)

drunkgoat (927967) | more than 8 years ago | (#14876972)

"New 'Hairy Lobster' Crustacean Discovered and Classified" Was it just me, or did anyone else read that and think of some government agency trying to classify and cover up a secret new form of life?

B-52's Rock Lobster (1)

Cutting_Crew (708624) | more than 8 years ago | (#14877005)

maybe from these lyrics [lyrics007.com] by the B-52's we could fit hairy lobster in there somewhere. maybe they could re-do the song. Hey lets get Weird-Al to do a parody! yeah! pass the salad plate please..

I hate to say it, but. . . (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#14877061)

In soviet Russia, fuzzy crustacean overlords welcome YOU!

Dear god.. (5, Informative)

boingo82 (932244) | more than 8 years ago | (#14877067)

this is by FAR the worst grammar I have ever seen in a summary. I am actually depressed.

"American-led divers discovered a new type of Crustacean,(comma unnecessary) that (which)resembles a lobster but has it's (its, dammit) claws covered in 'sinuous, hair-like strands'. This species is so different, (comma unnecessary) from other Crustacean's (apostrophe inappropriate) that it was classified with a new Family name: Kiwaida. Unfortunately for the Kiwaida, the AP is already using this blind creature and a salad plate in the same sentence."

Spoooooon1! (1)

Jedi Holocron (225191) | more than 8 years ago | (#14877090)

Looks like a giant albino underwater tick with hairy claws.
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