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Welcome to The Age of the Web Hermit

timothy posted more than 8 years ago | from the age-31-lives-in-mom's-basement-hey-waitaminute dept.


tyroneking writes "Phil Hartup on has captured the Zeitgeist of the web-aware generation: The Age of the Web Hermit describes how some lucky souls can live their lives, earn money, buy necessities and even find love on the Internet. 'Is there anything that we really need good old fashioned Real Life for any more?'; not me!"

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Fp (-1, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733247)

Fristy Post!

What? (5, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733249)

Is there anything that we really need good old fashioned Real Life for any more?
Pussy comes to mind.

Re:What? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733294)

Who needs that when you have pr0n. Relationships are for chumps anyway and bitches ain't shit but hos and tricks.

Re:What? (5, Funny)

drinkypoo (153816) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733354)

In many places in this wide world, you can get pussy delivered.

Re:What? (5, Funny)

fdiskne1 (219834) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733688)

In many places in this wide world, you can get pussy delivered.

Only on Slashdot could this be modded "Interesting".

Re:What? (1)

LordOfTheNoobs (949080) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733810)

Only a slashdot obligatrist (coin) would assume only slashdot would find 'Interesting' demand delivery sex service. I assure its appeal is vast among all populations capable of affording it.

/ the (coin) being both the act of wordsmithing as well as the MarioBROS((c)Nintendo)) sound to accompany it

Re:What? (5, Funny)

Digital Vomit (891734) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733409)

Problem solved! []

Re:What? (1)

P3NIS_CLEAVER (860022) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733477)

taking a shit.

Re:What? (1)

sevinkey (448480) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733535)

My wife gives me all the pussy I need. And she delivers beer now that she works with me at home! :D

I sometimes don't leave my house for a week at a time.

Re:What? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733640)

You can't find porn on the web? Your monitor must be turned off.

Re:What? (1)

CtrlPhreak (226872) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733717)

What, never heard of russian brides? They've all gone to the internet now.

As Sandra Bullock demonstrated.... (5, Funny)

arcite (661011) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733782)

in THE NET: Angela Bennett is a computer expert. This young and beautiful analyst is never far from a computer and modem. The only activity she has outside of computers is visiting her mother. A friend, whom she's only spoken to over the net and phone, Dale Hessman, sent her a program with a weird glitch for her to de-bug. That night, he left to meet her and was killed in a plane crash. Angela discovers secret information on the disk she has received only hours before she leaves for vacation. Her life then turns into a nightmare, her records are erased from existence and she is given a new identity, one with a police record. She struggles to find out why this has happened and who has it in for her.

Moral of the story? If you are a modern day hermit, atleast take the time to introduce yourself to the pizza man incase your stalkers find you out and erase your IDENTITY.

Alternatively, when being chased by phychopaths who want your data, remember to back it up on a trusty floppy disk. NOTHING can hurt those!

Alternatively, always choose Macintosh, the only laptop that effieciently upload viruses to alien space crafts and save the planet.

Alternatively, if you are as hot as Sandra Bullock and are also a modern day hermit, I would like you to have my ICQ#, I'm here to help ANY WAY I CAN.

You mean besides SEX?! (4, Funny)

twofidyKidd (615722) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733252)

The Internet cannot get you drunk. I should know, I've tried.

Re:You mean besides SEX?! (1)

Rude Turnip (49495) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733277)

You can have alcoholic beverages delivered to your home, just like you can have food delivered.

Re:You mean besides SEX?! (1, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733496)

I've actually had absinthe delivered from Germany. Something I couldn't buy even if I ventured from my house.

Re:You mean besides SEX?! (1)

voice_of_all_reason (926702) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733497)

Getting busted for ordering untaxed cigarettes and booze is up there with High Treason now, right?

Re:You mean besides SEX?! (2, Funny)

Clinton (798067) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733298)

Oh come on, just go into your favorite AOL chat room and take a drink of beer every time you see LOL. You'll be drunk in no time!

Re:You mean besides SEX?! (2, Interesting)

jizziknight (976750) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733311)

Well, you can still have "sex" on the internet, but in the end, you're still servicing yourself.

Really, the only thing you can't get from the internet is any sort of real, live, physical human contact (ignoring the fact that you can probably order a hooker online, but they still have to come to your home or wherever to provide any "service").

Re:You mean besides SEX?! (2, Funny)

twistedsymphony (956982) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733647)

Physical contact?
Pff... your hardware [] is obviously obsolete.

The internet... (2, Funny)

Mikachu (972457) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733255)

The internet: the only place where you can change your penis size.

Re:The internet... (3, Funny)

voice_of_all_reason (926702) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733556)

Ah yes, but don't you have to put on your robe and wizard hat first before casting that level 13 Scroll of Engorging?

Re:The internet... (1)

RainingBlood (829518) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733628)

Well, I don't know about that. My penis seems to change size quite well in my girlfriends bed. Hmm, maybe I don't really belong in this thread...

Maybe I'm there... (3, Funny)

ErikTheRed (162431) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733256)

I mean, if you consider "reading Slashdot" as "going out and socializing"....

Re:Maybe I'm there... (5, Interesting)

ObsessiveMathsFreak (773371) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733284)

Speaking as an abstainer in a country where socializing equates to "getting very, very drunk", I can safely say that reading Slashdot trumps socializing every single time.

Re:Maybe I'm there... (2, Insightful)

kevin_conaway (585204) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733398)

Or perhaps you just need new friends. My friends and I go out plenty of times without resorting to getting plastered.

Its called being comfortable with yourself so you don't have to get drunk and act like you're not yourself

Re:Maybe I'm there... (2)

FooAtWFU (699187) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733571)

Unfortunately, you can't just order new friends over the Internet to be delivered to your doorstep. Depending on where you live / who else lives nearby / where you work / how much free time you have and a number of other factors like that, you may or may not be able to find a suitable set of convenient friends. As for the inconvenient friends, well.... then you have the Internet.

Re:Maybe I'm there... (2, Insightful)

G-funk (22712) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733575)

Psst! Here's a tip. It's not staying off the booze that makes regular people not want to go out with you guys, it's your attitude. Whenever my mates go out there's always a couple of people who don't drink, or *gasp* just have a couple. And nobody cares. I know Timmy the jock made fun of you for not being able to drink a whole six-pack (wow) when you were 16, but people grow up.

Re:Maybe I'm there... (5, Insightful)

ElleyKitten (715519) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733655)

You've got that reversed. It's not that the drunk people don't want to hang out with sober people, it's that sober people don't want to hang out with drunk people. I'll have some wine or hard lemonade every now and then, but I'm over the stage where I enjoyed getting plastered, and now people just look like idiots to me when they're drunk, and not in an entertaining way.

Re:Maybe I'm there... (1)

cayenne8 (626475) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733758)

"...but I'm over the stage where I enjoyed getting plastered..."

Hmm...exactly how does THAT happen? That is quite sad....hope it never happens to me.

Everything goes better with booze....


Re:Maybe I'm there... (1, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733589)

I'm of the belief that there are a lot of people out there that give good potential to be great friends. Say 1-10% of the population (that's great friends, not people you put up with or are acquaintences with). Even if .1% or similar, that's a HUGE number of people when you are talking at least millions of people out there one might run into (potentially billions if you travel a lot but many don't given how we live).

But at 1-5% or less, it becomes a resource management issue. Such a low percentage means you have to interact with 99% of assholes and other folks before you find that 1%. And the interaction can be of varying lengths before that discovery is made; I've had impressive initial interactions with people that have then turned out to be very nasty, fake, silly individuals at heart, and very poor initial interactions with people who have turned out to be amongst my best friends.

And it's all a lot of work and energy. Meeting 100 people, much less 100 people in-depth, is a lot of work. Don't forget, you might have family, have to eat, work, exercise, read, learn, etc. and all that through the day, most our friends are that of coincidence with other aspects of our lives.

So, the percentage one runs into that end up being good friends, that's the problem. You have to pour a lot of time into meeting people, weed out folks, and that's just on your end. Friendship is bi-directional--they have to consider you a friend as well and be open to having "new friends." Surprisingly, many people are set in their ways and aren't open to meeting new people--they already have their friends, have family, career, etc.

Put another way, the number of people whose times to meet, intelligence, geographical area, and (roughly) interests overlap are quite rare. Combine that with like minds in forming a friendship, and the results are lower.

And this is also why the internet, with meetups and matchmaking works.

Friends? (2, Funny)

zaphod_es (613312) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733666)

I have an imaginary friend, doesn't even matter if my internet it down :)

Re:Maybe I'm there... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733685)

I don't know about you guys, but I get drunk for the purpose of acting like an idiot, and blaming it on the alcohol later!

I was going to post something witty... (0, Offtopic)

tyroneking (258793) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733265)

... and incisive along the lines that I submitted the story and got to first-post it as well but I was beaten to the ... err ... post.
Oh well - I'm still happy to get a story posted and this will spur me on the become even more of a hermit ....

Re:I was going to post something witty... (1)

tyroneking (258793) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733293)

"spur me on TO become even more of a hermit ...."

Unless you also use your laptop as a commode... (5, Insightful)

ScentCone (795499) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733296)

... then you're probably pretty much connected to the Real World. Running water, power, fancy new video boards... someone in the real world is providing those items.

I don't think this is any more isolation than a serious resident of the library used to be 50 years ago. And when people in NY figured out (decades ago) that they could, say, write books for a living and have Chinese delivered at 3:00AM... it's scarecely different. In fact, I'd argue that a lot people who used to be hermits (or would have been if they were born 20 years earlier) are probalby more connected to the real world because the internet exists.

Unless, as I suspect, I'm currently typing this text into a big, scalable, and very flawed Turing test machine. If a response is posted to this, its non-sequitor-ness will prove my suspicions. Go!

Re:Unless you also use your laptop as a commode... (5, Funny)

SgtPepperKSU (905229) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733345)

Are you sure? What makes you feel this way?

Re:Unless you also use your laptop as a commode... (3, Funny)

ScentCone (795499) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733367)

Are you sure? What makes you feel this way?

Hah! I knew it!

Re:Unless you also use your laptop as a commode... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733467)

Nice Eliza quote.

Re:Unless you also use your laptop as a commode... (1)

MrPsycho (939714) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733570)

Thanks, this made me laugh a lot.

Re:Unless you also use your laptop as a commode... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733420)

In soviet russia, non-sequitor-ness is cliché.

You have to log off eventually (3, Funny)

Hoi Polloi (522990) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733658)

The ultimate limit on your online time is when you get bedsores on your ass.

Shut-ins (5, Insightful)

Bullfish (858648) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733301)

There have always been shut-ins. The net just gives them more to do behind their drawn curtains and locked doors. Some people may see this as cool, but in the long run we look as such people as kooky. We all need to interact with others, that is just our nature. We are social creatures whether we like it or not. Some more so than others to be sure, but still.

Can you live locked in a basement having evrything shipped to you and slid under the door? Sure, but to me that sounds very much like prison.

No thanks.

Re:Shut-ins (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733330)

Prison with a fat pipe wouldn't be that bad. :X

Besides, there are millions of middle aged people now raiding in WoW on school nights and weekends. Some people call them 'shut ins', others call them 'well geared'!

Re:Shut-ins (5, Funny)

pixelpusher220 (529617) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733471)

Um...plenty o' fat pipes in prison.

It's just sorta like Soviet Russia.

You don't use the pipe to access society, (prison) society uses the pipe to access YOU!

Re:Shut-ins (1)

Schraegstrichpunkt (931443) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733772)

Why is that kind of behaviour tolerated in your prisons?

Re:Shut-ins (2, Interesting)

DarkDragonVKQ (881472) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733342)

True, humans as a species require social interaction. I cannot deny that with all the classes and information I've studied in both psychology and sociology. Though isn't is possible to somewhat replace physical interaction with someone with interaction online? We are interacting right now? Granted its hard for me to read your body language, facial expression, etc. I feel that as we continue to progress in technology, as video/audio chat gets better and better. Then the next jump to whatever (VR?) that what constitues human interaction may need to reworked.

Re:Shut-ins (2, Funny)

bunhed (208100) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733718)

Oh man, I don't even want to think about the /. forums with all those faces and voices in a tiny little window.

Re:Shut-ins (5, Interesting)

truthsearch (249536) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733510)

For those who would be shut-ins anyway this bundle of tubes provides a way to socialize. People need to interact, but they're always finding new ways to do it online: /. threads, forums, blogs and blog comments, chat rooms, Second Life, etc. There's a problem when a person who would otherwise be out socializing becomes a shut-in. But for those who are more comfortable as shut-ins there are new ways to socialize.

Re:Shut-ins (1)

Surt (22457) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733528)

But if you face the walls the right direction, it makes for the very best kind of prison.

Re:Shut-ins (1)

TexasDex (709519) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733629)

Prison is just a question of choice. Some would call it sanctuary.

Re:Shut-ins (2, Interesting)

kfg (145172) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733687)

Thoreau is popularly, but erroneously, regarded as a hermit.

In fact he not only traveled and socialized widely, even during his years at Walden pond, but even wrote in Walden, his journal of his experiment in minimalist living, that social interaction is one of the minimum requirements of human life.

And he didn't mean some form correspondence by that. The Internet only provides social interaction by correspondence.

Melville has been put forward as an example of the true writing solitary, but he had to live in a city with other people to support his solitude. In fact, ironically, he had to have a wife to pull it off.

Thoreau could live alone in the woods as a "half and half" solitary because he was willing to go to the city and interact with people face to face in order to meet his needs. And never married.

As others have pointed out your basic Internet hermit only exists within the framework of a vast civilized superstructure to supply his solitude. He is alone among many. A shut in, yes, but a very peculiar kind of "hermit," a word which has always implied true isolation and dependence on self.

A while ago I was showing someone plans for a boat I had designed to sail the Atlantic alone. Their first question was not about the danger of the undertaking, but "Won't you get lonely?"

I replied, "Why? I'm pretty good company, aren't I?"

I can go weeks without any human contact whatsoever and not mind at all. I rather enjoy it now and again. I'm better company than most. But there comes a time. . .

As a lifelong "solitary," frankly, I think some of you need to get out more.


My rights online? (3, Interesting)

el americano (799629) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733310)

Apparently I have the right to be a web hermit. Otherwise this wouldn't be YRO, right?

Great for the disabled/homebound (1)

elgee (308600) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733325)

The Web in particular and the Internet in general is a great benefit to those who are homebound because of illness or disability.

My Biography (0, Redundant)

ThePopeLayton (868042) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733328)

Wow, total story of my life!!!


whatever (2, Funny)

kaoshin (110328) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733340)

I don't use the internet. What a bunch of suckers.

Re:whatever (1)

Malnathor (588724) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733484)

Liar! Your low six digit slashdot ID betrays you.

Re:whatever (2, Funny)

Eternauta3k (680157) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733671)

I don't use the internet. What a bunch of suckers
Can you say that again? The last smoke signal was kinda blurry.

Just because you can... (3, Insightful)

JorDan Clock (664877) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733357)

Just because you can do those things on the internet doesn't necessarily mean it's better to do them there. Humans, by nature, are social animals. There is only so much interaction a web page or an IM can provide.

I mean, when was the last time someone gave you a hug through your monitor?

Re:Just because you can... (4, Funny)

Kesch (943326) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733423)


Re:Just because you can... (2, Funny)

Stephen Williams (23750) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733479)

I mean, when was the last time someone gave you a hug through your monitor?



Re:Just because you can... (0, Redundant)

LordKazan (558383) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733492)

(go ahead churchies, mark me flamebait for making negative remarks about your fairytail-of-choice)

when engaging in that social activity means going down to the local establishment filled with a cloud of cancer causing toxins and engaging in an activity that kills braincells OR going to down your local brainwashing center (aka Church) and engaging in mass displays of superstitution and dogmaticism.

I'll take a pass and monkey around on the net.

However; no, I am not a web-hermit. My fiancee and I just went down to KC to see her favorite MLS team the Houstan Dynamo kick the K.C. Wizard's blue butts after we had been down there wednesday to see our local team (Des Moines Menace) play them in the open cup. We run, occasionally go camping, etc too. Definantly not a web hermit.

"socialization" in this country is generally considered poisoning yourself (either physically at the bar, or mentally at church) - that's not socializing in my book, that's insanity. I'll take a pass.

Re:Just because you can... (1)

dknj (441802) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733563)

socialization does not mean go to bar and get pissy drunk while smoking death sticks. i socialize on a daily basis when i travel to work. hope the metro, sit down next to random person and strike up a random conversation. several of my gfs were found this way.. my last gf and i never even went to bars, but went to museums and such. of course this isn't limited just to women, going to a local restaurant and sitting at the bar* while i eat lunch allowed me to make new business contacts. or, the time a bigwig of Morgan Stanely needed a jumpstart allowed me to sit down with him for 30 minutes for a decent conversation.

socialization means going out and meeting with new people. for most of the 20-some crowd, this generally means going to a bar and getting shitfaced and waking up next to a stranger. for the older and it means going outside and saying "HI NEIGHBOR". to the younger, it means going to your friend's house to play video games.

and to stay ontopic, due to this insane heat i am being a complete web hermit today. after reading a funny k5 post, i decided to look at the w4m board on craigslist. the first post actually yielded an interesting chick to talk to. i will write a journal if i ever get coffee with this woman

lets kill this thread here, please.

*if you worry about a little second hand smoke (generally upscale restaurant bars aren't as smokey at lunch) then you need to reconsider that diet coke you're drinking.

Re:Just because you can... (0, Offtopic)

LordKazan (558383) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733677)

I wasn't talking about the dictionary definition of the word, or even the educated person with-more-than-two-braincells definition of the word - i meant the Joe Sixpack (as much as I hate that term) meaning of the word.

I don't drink diet pop, not only can I not pallet the artificial sweeteners but their breakdown products are toxic IIRC - I tend to drink normal pop as sugars are easily metabolized with exercise - and even then only at meals - between meals I tend to drink water

as for "a little second hand smoke" have you not been paying attention to the toxicity of ETS? "a little second hand smoke" does a LOT of damage - the toxicity threshold of ETS is so low that any concentration can be considered toxic - a concentration strong enough to smell (not to mention even higher concentrations that you can see) is orders of magnitude above the toxicity threshold.

Furthermore - drinking pop is something you voluntarily engage in. Being exposed to ETS is something I am FORCED to engage in - walking down the street, sitting in the privacy of my own home with the windows open, driving down the road, walking through a parking lot, walking into a non-smoking establishment, and a million other daily activities.

request to kill thread denied. PK awarded to me for your attempt to manipulate the argument with false analogies

Re:Just because you can... (-1, Flamebait)

StarvingSE (875139) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733833)

I totally agree on the second-hand smoke issue. The only reason that smoking in public places is allowed is because of the lobbys from big tobacco.

It doesn't matter where you go: bowling alley, pool hall, restaurant, park, people are smoking, and everyone is forced to breathe it. I am consistently rebutted by people who smoke around me with "its my right to smoke wherever I want" when I ask them to please smoke elsewhere. It is not their right, becuase it is infringing on my rights. Its like saying you have the right to let your dog shit on anyone's property. It makes no sense.

Like the parent said, drinking a diet coke doesn't infringe on anyone's rights. If there was no second hand smoke hazard, I wouldn't care in the least. But the fact is that there is, and I have the right to go to whatever establishment I choose with the expectation of breathing non-poisoned air.

reminds me off (5, Informative)

scenestar (828656) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733366)

The japanese hikkomori syndrome. ( html [] )

When people start substituting real life with a digitall one it usually doesn't end to well.

Humans are by nature social beings, if the "old" ways fail one starts to look for an alternative.

Besides, real life interaction (think of sex ) will allways beat the "cyber" equivalent.


Re:reminds me off (-1)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733766)

My god. No wonder the world is in the state it is.

1. of (subject)

2. digital (line 2)
3. too (line 2)
4. , (line 3)
5. always (line 4)

No child left behind indeed.

In the words of The Human Ton and Handy:


Re:reminds me off (1, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733789)

"When people start substituting real life with a digitall one it usually doesn't end to well."

I disagree. It depends on the person, who they are, and where they live. For me, it's quite the opposite. I get in more trouble when I do go out. I have and do substitute more and more my TV and internet time for so-called real life activities, because I find real life full of buffoons, incompetent asses, and authority abusers. And it's a bad cycle, because there ARE many good people out there; I know because of my life before I went this way, but less and less so because I think more and more people more like me are not going out but spending time on the internet or the like.

I can interact with people. I find great enjoyment in interacting with good, intelligent people. Most people that I talk to actually like me (so I'm told). But, strange as it sounds, I have this extreme, near hate with interacting with people except my closest friends.

Why? I almost always end up in trouble.

Drive around? Get speeding tickets. You say don't speed, but I really don't. In Pennsylvania, USA, tickets are more like a tax given out for those 3rd shifters who have to get to work or those returning to the city. And law and magistrate system reflects that--the standard is guilty until proven innocent, no court recrods, not the other way around.

Or gotta put up with same damn fool with road rage or driving your bumper. And being a loner by default, that puts you at risk--being a loner is considered "bad", and in an evidentiary based system, you are considered the evil party because, well, the other person has someone with them who bears false witness.

Interact with family? My family is one of those families that appear nice, but are truly fucked up. Blames everyone else for their ills. I know when I'm wrong, but in my family, that makes me the one to blame since the one who does take responsibility is the only one and hence the one when something does go wrong is immediately blamed for, regardless of the actuality of the situation. It gets piled on.

Go to the mall? Got screamed at, accused of groping (didn't), got walked over group when window shopping, etc.

Go to movies? Yeah right. Well documented on /. I'll wait for the DVD, thank you.

The other thing I do that I enjoy these days--food industry. Love restaurants, going out to eat. That's about it. Everything else is a damn chore, a task. I find more joy in doing laundry and watching CNBC then going out to the mall, movies, local bar, etc.

People say humans are social individuals. That's true. But if you look at my real life interactions, and subtract out interactions that are beyond that of the business sense (ordering food while at a restaurant), I easily go months without talking to a human being in real life.

Social Hermits? (4, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733368)

My cronjob web-based order to pizza hut should kick in within the hour. Automatic bill-pay for my bills, telecommute and direct deposit for work...but no, I'm not a friggin hermit. I'm running GAIM and posting to slashdot. I play games online once in a while...that's considered human interaction, right?

If you want a web hermit, go stick a picture of Stallman with the relevance of ESR and you've got yourself your posterboy.

Now if you can give me a dynamic World of Warcraft type immersive game where everyone else is AI, then maybe I'll be a hermit.

Re:Social Hermits? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733514)

Got it. It's called Oblivion. "Want to hear a Khajiit joke?"

Digital life is pure luxury (5, Insightful)

Dekortage (697532) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733371)

From the article: "...we have to ask ourselves -- is there anything that we really need good old fashioned Real Life for any more? Is a life of doing things and meeting people as our primitive ancestors in the late 20th Century knew it becoming redundant?"

Let's assume that a billion people on Earth have the money and time to be online regularly. (this is probably more than the real number) That leaves more than five billion without such a thing. There are significant percentages of people in rural parts of the world (from Africa to America and everywhere in between) who don't even have electricity, telephones, or real plumbing. And let's not even talk about food and medicine.

The upshot? If you have the capacity for living most of your life online, and you can take all that real-life survival stuff for granted, you are enjoying a life of luxury. And the best part is that, online, you will almost never encounter those poor starving folks, so you can safely ignore their existence (just like you do on your way to Starbucks). Enjoy!

Quick check: in terms of income, how do you rank globally [] ?

(Go ahead, mod me as a troll... I've got karma to burn.)

Re:Digital life is pure luxury (2, Funny)

IflyRC (956454) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733438)

(just like you do on your way to Starbucks) I may be confused, but if I am on my way to Starbucks and ignoring people, how I am totally living my life online??

I just think the statement is a little contradictory to the topic at hand. Shouldn't I be paying someone to go pick up my Starbucks for me since I am living a life of luxury and never want to go outside? I mean, if *I* have to go get my own Starbucks, obviously I'm not a hermit nor am I living a life of extreme luxury.

Re:Digital life is pure luxury (1)

Dekortage (697532) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733547)

If you can afford Starbucks (especially regularly), then on a global scale, you are living in extreme luxury.

The "on your way to Starbucks" comment is drawn from the article, where the author refers to going to Starbucks to use the Internet access there.

Re:Digital life is pure luxury (1)

IflyRC (956454) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733574)

where the author refers to going to Starbucks to use the Internet access there. Can't be that luxurious if I can't afford internet at home :|

Re:Digital life is pure luxury (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733440)

Ask and ye shall receive.

Re:Digital life is pure luxury (2, Insightful)

ArmyOfFun (652320) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733652)

The average non shut-in American will probably never encounter a poor starving person either. Before the internet, most Americans were probably already finding out about poor starving people via mainstream media. An internet shut-in might have an extra layer of insulation against the poor starving masses, but most Amercians insulation was already complete.

I'll counter that it's far easier to find out about and read about poor starving people than it was before the internet. It's also easier to research and donate to various charities. All the ones I know about and donate to readily accept credit card payments over the internet.

Evolve or Die! (1)

creimer (824291) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733400)

Does this mean that the typical /. basement crawler is now an endangered species as web hermits take over the world? Inquiring minds want to know...

Re:Evolve or Die! (1)

justkarl (775856) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733450)

Does this mean that the typical /. basement crawler is now an endangered species as web hermits take over the world?

You could say that...It's not like any of them are reproducing.

Semi-hermit (5, Funny)

kayakun (986097) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733418)

I confess, I'm a hermit. I'm probably one of the very few people who goes to college and spends all his time in his room. I'm not a full-hermit, though, since I do go out to buy groceries and things like that, but my social life is basically non-existent. I don't even have friends in college, and I have maybe a total of 5 people I talk to through IM. Being a hermit isn't that bad, but most importantly, it's my choice. Some people may prefer to hermit themselves due to social anxieties or phobias. At least the Internet makes hermitting more entertaining. The biggest draw-back is probably the lack of physical contact. I haven't received a hug in years. I don't miss talking out-loud much though. As a matter of fact, since I haven't talked in so long, when I talk out-loud my throat gets sore. Ouch.

Re:Semi-hermit (2, Interesting)

SgtPepperKSU (905229) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733435)

I'm having a hard time deciding whether to laugh at or cry for your post.

Re:Semi-hermit (1)

rock_climbing_guy (630276) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733569)

Have a nice day!

You have been trolled!

Question (1)

truthsearch (249536) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733557)

Are you a hermit because your "digital lifestyle" makes it easy and comfortable? I guess what I'm asking is would you still be a hermit if the internet didn't exist?

If you would choose to be a hermit no matter what, then the internet is simply providing more forms of socializing. But if you're only a hermit because of the comfort of the internet then it might be a problem.

Re:Semi-hermit (1)

joe 155 (937621) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733773)

I'm a bit of a hermit too, I'm at uni aswell and don't really have any friends from my course. I really felt like a weird/wierd hermit the other day when I thought about the firends I had - I was struggling to name more than one who I didn't speak to exclusively online. Still, I suppose I live with my girlfriend so I kinda expect the whole contact with other people to drop away anyway...

You go do that (3, Funny)

l0ungeb0y (442022) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733422)

Yeah, get it on with your bad web hermit self.
I'm sure there's a lot of people out there who aspire to be a balding fattie eating delivery pizza every day and jacking it to internet pr0n. I hear guys like that drive the women wild.
I consider it natural selection -- self removal from the gene-pool.
Go Darwin go!


Re:You go do that (1, Interesting)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733842)

Yeah, go natural selection. It always seems to make the best decisions, right? I guess that's why trailer parks are chock full of kids and Newton and Leibniz both died childless. Our species peaked a few hundred years ago, it's all downhill from there.

The answer: (1)

kripkenstein (913150) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733452)

"Is there anything that we really need good old fashioned Real Life for any more?"

Nope, nothing at all. Certainly not a job. Instead of real work, create a web site, post a witty article there, split it into 5 pages, each with about 40% ad content, some of that being flashy annoying banners.

Not clear on the 'earning money online' bit (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733480)

If I could get that angle down, I'd be there. I try to stay home as much as possible as it is (not getting pussy wether I leave or not, so why bother?).

But I just got an internet... (0, Redundant)

guruevi (827432) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733493)

And I can't do all that with it. I can just enlarge some bodyparts with that internet. I think I'll have to add more tubes.

Getting there (2, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733511)

I used to go out all the time and I had a good amount of close friends. However over the past year I've been retreating more and more into my home. I leave my apt for necessary things like food and work but I never go out socially. I've lost touch with all my friends, I don't even know why I have a cell phone anymore. I don't know what happened to me. I know I have problems with depression and I take medication, but I guess the shit isn't working. Also my anxiety in social situations has increased alot and I guess I just avoid them in fear.

It's a shitty way to live and it's not like I dont want to change it. But I feel like I'm stuck.

Re:Getting there (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733785)

Put yourself in a situation where you have to interact with other people in a social way. Go for some beer with someone from work and complain about your boss. Stuff like that.

One thing you can do is volunteer for work on a working ship. The cruise is always fun - seeing the ocean and such. The side benefit is that you are basically forced to interact with other people on the ship. There's lots to talk about (fog again! how 'bout them waves? what does this button do?), and the environment on ships is condusive to being chummy.

In the end, though, it's up to you to force yourself to interact. It's hit-and-miss, but you're bound to meet someone who shares your outlook.

Damn, I should be a therapist! :)

Re:Getting there (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733857)

Take maybe $3000 and go on a trip to Asia or somewhere similer. Aside from adventure, its cheap, exotic food, exotic people. See what life is like somewhere else, you will be surprized and find that your life isn't so bad after all.

Luv, twu luv. (4, Funny)

nick_davison (217681) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733516)

"Some lucky souls can live their lives, earn money, buy necessities and even find love on the Internet."

Why, those lucky souls truly have everything in the palm of their hand.

Rehash (1)

Brix Braxton (676594) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733539)

Lame article.

This was all covered a few years ago by an MSN contest that challenged a group of people to live in a house and get and do everything over the internet. It's been a while and it might have just been a long ad campaign but it was explored pretty fully back then.

You could write the same article about the telephone - Some folks can work over a telephone, get entertainment over a telephone and order food over a telephone - big deal.

You might be a web hermit if... (4, Funny)

Bushido Hacks (788211) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733543)

You might be a web hermit if...
  • You lock your self in your room to look at source code.
  • When your mom opens the door you yell "Mom, close the door! Your letting the demons out!"
  • Your hygene habits resemble that of a svelte Theodore Kaczynski.
  • When the power goes out, you immediately stop breathing.
  • Goths have stopped by your house and ask if they can hang around your room because it is dark and creapy.
  • You secretly write love letters to fictional anime characters.
  • You friends (if you have any) have started a chapter of the Secret Snake Club []

Reminds me of a Sci-fi book I read once. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733560)

I can't remember the name of the book; I read it some time in the 1960s probably. It foretold a world where there would be very little interpersonal interaction. People would return to their windowless apartments at the end of the day and find all their needs met. The author thought of everything. Smoking was a fire hazard so if you wanted to smoke, there was a tube that came out of the wall to provide cigarette smoke. If you wanted sex, you could have a completely real feeling experience with any movie star of your choice. Naturally, people became completely disconnected from each other and (IIRC) it all ended badly.

I was quite young when I read the book and wonder what I would think of it now. If anyone can tell me what it was called I would be most grateful. Thanks.

Anyway, people have been thinking about something like the internet hermit for a long time and I don't think many authors thought it was a very good idea. 1984 was quite a stark warning of how the state could use modern technology to subvert democracy by controlling people's minds. In that regard, as long as the state does not control the internet, the internet hermits might be better off than the mass of zombies who get their news from Fox. Hmm. Put me down as undecided.

Re:Reminds me of a Sci-fi book I read once. (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733673)

That sounds like Brave New World by Aldous Huxley. (if it isn't, then that book is extremely similar in character)

The Cage? (1)

XanC (644172) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733725)

Sounds a lot like the pilot of Star Trek (TOS of course).

hmmm (1)

mseidl (828824) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733601)

Believe me! Sunlight is good!

Gambling's too unreliable, ebay sucks because (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 8 years ago | (#15733630) inolves leaving the house to buy merchandise and to ship crap. So, my question to you lot is; what other ways are there to make a living off of staying at home if you're not a web developer, that is.

Actually i am one of those (2, Funny)

unity100 (970058) | more than 8 years ago | (#15733657)

I do everything except the very frequent things (bread buying etc) from the net.

'Net' is our country, we are its citizens. We are the 'Net'.

As an added bonus, i can opt to go out and 'socialize' in the old fashioned way, in the manner and time i choose.

Isnt it fantastic ?
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