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AOL Digs Up Yard for Spam Gold

samzenpus posted about 8 years ago | from the online-treasure-map dept.

230

Registered Coward v2 writes "AOL is planning to dig in a MA couple's yard looking for buried gold and platinum owned by a spammer they successfully sued for spamming AOL. AOL said Tuesday it intends to search for gold and platinum bars the company suspects are hidden near the home of Davis Wolfgang Hawke's parents on two acres in Medfield, Massachusetts. The family said it will fight in court to oppose AOL's plans."

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obligatory.... (5, Funny)

LiquidCoooled (634315) | about 8 years ago | (#15917628)

23473437 Gold
23473437 Platinum
23473437 Me too!!!!11!!!one!!
23473437 Gold Rush
23473437 Pirates
23473437 Pirates -Caribbean
23473437 Plunder
23473437 Spam
23473437 Spam Gold
23473437 how to stop spam
23473437 gold in Mrs Wolfgang Hawkes' backyard
23473437 gold in Mrs Wolfgang Hawkes' frontyard
23473437 gold in Mrs Wolfgang Hawkes' land
23473437 gold in Medfield fields
23473437 court fight
23473437 lawyers
23473437 lawyers -sco
23473437 how to kill your wife
23473437 how to kill customers
23473437 poop

Re:obligatory.... (-1, Offtopic)

Hamilton Publius (909539) | about 8 years ago | (#15917726)

Illinois Senator Barack Obama warns citizens at his 50th Town Hall meeting about gas guzzling, WPSD-TV reports.

It was among many points made to the standing room only audience at the Metropolis Community Center. Obama spoke on everything from DC politics to global warming.

He says part of the blame for the world's higher temperatures rests on gas guzzling vehicles. Obama says consumers can make the difference by switching to higher mileage hybrids.

Today the Senator said, "It would save more energy, do more for the environment and create better world security than all the drilling we could do in Alaska."

"After the meeting... Obama left in a GMC Envoy after admitting to favoring SUV's himself," claimed local News Channel 6.

MORE

Tommy Vietor, Senator Obama's press secretary, explains: "What Senator Obama has long advocated is the use of vehicles that are more fuel efficient, including but not exclusively hybrids.

"The vehicle senator obama travels in while in illinois is a Flexible Fuel Vehicle (FFV), which can run on e85, a blended fuel made of 85 percent ethanol.

"So he in fact was practicing what he preached at the town hall meeting in Metropolis yesterday when he said we must drive fewer gas-guzzling vehicles."

But it does not appear [e85fuel.com] that GMC's Envoy is E85 ready. One wonders why so many slashdot readers have such a boner for Obama.

Re:obligatory.... (2, Funny)

stinerman (812158) | about 8 years ago | (#15917776)

You missed "steak and cheese". :-)

Smart one, guys! (1)

TrisexualPuppy (976893) | about 8 years ago | (#15917829)

Greenbaum said her husband and father intend to challenge AOL's plans to dig on the family's property and search the family's 3,000-square-foot home. She said AOL's lawyer notified the family that the company intends to use bulldozers and geological teams to hunt for gold and platinum on their property.

AOL said it will try to accommodate Hawke's parents by not being too obtrusive.
As if bulldozers weren't obtrusive when they're tearing up your yard?

Is it possible for AOL to do anything even more stupid? Are they trying to set a record for stuipd things in a month? Never have the mighty fallen so far.

Re:obligatory.... (4, Funny)

LordSnooty (853791) | about 8 years ago | (#15917877)

23473437 Pirates -Caribbean

Haha, as if AOL users would be savvy enough to use the NOT operator. You had me going up to that point!

Nothing to hide? (5, Interesting)

eddy (18759) | about 8 years ago | (#15917632)

I know this will sound like a stupid "If you've got nothing to hide...", but really, if there weren't anything hidden out there, and AOL could be made sure to fix any damage the do (grass, trees, etc).. why would you fight this? Wouldn't it simply be AMUSING to watch them flail blindly?

Re:Nothing to hide? (5, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917643)

You're totally right. Hell, a couple months ago, my wife was bothering me: "We need a new barn! It's falling apart, for Darwins sake!" I kept telling her that we don't have the money for a new barn. Then it hit me: Tip off the FBI that Hoffa is buried under it.

My, how they came in droves. Destroyed the barn, including the foundation. And now, they're rebuilding it at tax payer expensive.

Re:Nothing to hide? (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917834)

Shhh. quiet. You might get bob_robertson's attention and he may respond about 'taking money from me at gunpoint' and/or any other libertarian mumbo-jumbo. *me ducks* ;)

Re:Nothing to hide? (3, Insightful)

sanyam_y (982945) | about 8 years ago | (#15917936)

I first thought that this posting was a spoof only to check that it is real. This shows how low can AOL get. After sacking half of its workforce it wants to dig backyards. Is it not digging its own graveyard...?

Re:Nothing to hide? (0, Troll)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917969)

Then it hit me: Tip off the FBI that Hoffa is buried under it.

And you could have rebuilt the barn yourself for what it cost to get bailed out for the false statements to the FBI.

Re:Nothing to hide? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15918007)

Hoffa is his pet hamster.

Re:Nothing to hide? (1)

Devv (992734) | about 8 years ago | (#15917644)

You know, they might have problems eating their dinner in the garden. The upside is the kids might get some rela Tonka-toys.

Re:Nothing to hide? (2, Interesting)

Peden (753161) | about 8 years ago | (#15917660)

Perhaps but their private property is none of AOL's business, having something to hide or not.
For all we know, Jimmy Hoffa could be buried there :)

Re:Nothing to hide? (1)

whoppers (307299) | about 8 years ago | (#15917665)

I doubt they're going to dig, they're only making a point to other potential spammers - "we're going to make your life hell as well if you spam".

It may not be right, but spammers are only bending the laws for their own personal gain and our laws just aren't tough enough. Hell, overall they're not tough enough, we're letting way too many criminals off easy. Let's go back to a hand, a foot and your first born for an eye. Next time you'll think twice about committing crime.

Re:Nothing to hide? (1, Insightful)

StringBlade (557322) | about 8 years ago | (#15917707)

Let's go back to a hand, a foot and your first born for an eye. Next time you'll think twice about committing crime.

In that case, you'd need a much more stringet set of requirements for the burden of proof lest you end up with a society of one handed, one footed, one eyed people, many of whom were falsely accused and convicted.

If you want to spur more violence and civil unrest all you need to do is overreact in an excessively violent manner. A perfect example of this is Israel and Lebanon. Understandably Israel was angered by the murder of their (three?) soldiers, but bombing Lebanon back to the stone age in retaliation was a bit on the "way overboard" side in terms of justice. And because of it did Lebanon and Hezbollah stop doing what they were doing? Of course not - it just escalated.

I'm not saying violence is never justified, but excessive violence is never justified. Would you lop off appendages for jaywalking, or just for murder? What about white-collar crimes like Ken Lay and Enron?

Re:Nothing to hide? (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917848)

Israel's problem is that they backed off--if they had nuked Damascus and Tehran, the scum would have been forced to submit. As it is, they are emboldened and rearming. There is nothing these islamofascists understand but overwhelming force and death.

Re:Nothing to hide? (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917856)

"What about white-collar crimes like Ken Lay and Enron?"

Lop 'em off at said collar!

Re:Nothing to hide? (2, Interesting)

fireboy1919 (257783) | about 8 years ago | (#15917887)

I present some interesting quotes on the subject for the uninitiated (uninitiated to Robert Heinlein's stance on militarism, that is). I like the one about cutting a baby's head off in chapter 5 and the one about "violence never solves anything" in chapter 1.

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Starship_Troopers [wikiquote.org]

Re:Nothing to hide? (1)

xarak (458209) | about 8 years ago | (#15917873)

and your first born for an eye

This is slashdot, not somewhere where people who reproduce go, you insensitive clod!
:)

Zero Tolerance (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917875)

Let's go back to a hand, a foot and your first born for an eye. Next time you'll think twice about committing crime.

What about instituting the death penalty for all transgressions, however minor? Provided that they occur in a Punishment Zone, of course.

(CleverNickName^W(The Devil made me do it!)

Re:Nothing to hide? (1)

StringBlade (557322) | about 8 years ago | (#15917677)

Probably because it's a hassle. Imagine waking each morning to the sound of a backhoe chewing through your well-manicured lawn. That's not something I'd want to hear for a couple weeks. Additionally, even if AOL replaces what they tear up, looking at Hydroseed on a big flat plot of dirt isn't quite as nice as the grass or other plants that used to be there.

And finally there's a consideration of the land having some environmental value such as being part wetland or home to wild grasses (this is all, of course speculation because TFA didn't say anything about it). At best, I could see AOL getting a warrant or equivalent to use metal detectors to sweep the land before being allowed to puruse any more drastic measures.

In the end, it's not amusing in the slightest for Hawke's parents and AOL's digging certainly infringes on their right to privacy. It would be no different if the guy buried gold and platinum bars in someone else's property (even if he did it illegally). It's not like they're looking for a body in a murder investigation - it's literally a treasure hunt, and I doubt very much AOL's right to dig is protected by law.

Re:Nothing to hide? (1)

mwvdlee (775178) | about 8 years ago | (#15917685)

Simple ground radar imaging should be able to pinpoint where to dig (if anywhere), so little (if any) damage would be done.

Re:Nothing to hide? (1)

Colin Smith (2679) | about 8 years ago | (#15917751)

You're a real killjoy. Looking for buried gold with radar is just missing the spirit of the exercise entirely. Ok so is a digger. They should have people out there with shovels.

 

Re:Nothing to hide? (2, Funny)

indifferent children (842621) | about 8 years ago | (#15918006)

Ok so is a digger. They should have people out there with shovels.

Well if they use a potato fork, AOL could be the most lucrative Gold Farmers in history.

Re:Nothing to hide? (5, Insightful)

15Bit (940730) | about 8 years ago | (#15917690)

For some people reparations are not enough. If you put a lot of effort into your garden and it gets bulldozered, then no amount of fixing is going to make it the same. Some plants take years to mature, and a nice, flat, moss-free lawn can take a lifetime. For many a garden is a labour of love, not just a quick trip to the garden centre.

And using heavy machinery does seem a bit like overkill. If the guy did bury his ill-gotten gains there, then he did it with a spade. Surely an old fashioned metal detector would do the trick, and failing that one of those clever underground scanners the archeologists use.

Re:Nothing to hide? (3, Insightful)

kfg (145172) | about 8 years ago | (#15917694)

AOL could be made sure to fix any damage the do (grass, trees, etc)..

Have you ever tried to "fix" a tree with a bulldozer?

KFG

Re:Nothing to hide? (1)

robbiedo (553308) | about 8 years ago | (#15917890)

Can you say," Al Capone's Vault?" They can get Geraldo Rivera out their on a live telecast for Time Warner, and make a feature length movie called "Gold in the Grass!"

Re:Nothing to hide? (1)

EXMSFT (935404) | about 8 years ago | (#15917960)

I expect that AOL will find the kind of riches one could only find in Capone's vault.

Wait... (1)

Klaidas (981300) | about 8 years ago | (#15917649)

Why would AOL dig the yard seaching for treasure? Couln't they just request to pay money for the damage?

Re:Wait... (1)

RuBLed (995686) | about 8 years ago | (#15917682)

Hawke couldn't cough up the money...

AOL : "All your gold belong to us..."

Re:Wait... (1)

mwvdlee (775178) | about 8 years ago | (#15917693)

So?

Take away all income and possessions until the debt is paid.
He now either has the choice of living in povery until he dies or digging up the gold/platinum himself and hoping to reclaim some sort of live afterwards.

Re:Wait... (3, Insightful)

kfg (145172) | about 8 years ago | (#15917715)

Take away all income and possessions until the debt is paid.

Someone didn't read the article. His income was from spamming and the only siezable possessions are a used cop car (whereabouts unknown) and . . .

. . .gold and platinum bars, because. . .

He now either has the choice of living in povery. . .

He has already made that choice. For some reason he just likes the idea of living in poverty with gold and platinum buried somewhere. Makes him feel comfy or something just knowing it's there while he's eating cold Kraft macaroni and cheese in the back seat of his used cop car, down by the Connecticut River.

KFG

Re:Wait... (1)

1u3hr (530656) | about 8 years ago | (#15917720)

Take away all income and possessions until the debt is paid. He now either has the choice of living in povery until he dies or digging up the gold/platinum himself

RTFA. AOL wants to search the spammer's PARENT's property for gold they allege he buried there. He's long gone, no known property to seize.

Re:Wait... (2, Informative)

$RANDOMLUSER (804576) | about 8 years ago | (#15917706)

From TFA:
AOL won a $12.8 million judgment last year in U.S. District Court in Virginia against Hawke but has been unable to contact Hawke to collect any of the money he was ordered to pay.
...
Greenbaum said she has not talked with her son in more than a year and complained about the embarrassment and humiliation he brought to the family.
"We don't know where is he," she said. "We certainly wouldn't allow him to put any gold on our property."
In other words, he can't be found, and this is a civil, not criminal matter, so even if he were found in another country, extradition doesn't apply.

Re:Wait... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917716)

Why would AOL dig the yard seaching for treasure? Couln't they just request to pay money for the damage?

Because the spammer is a scumbag who makes a mockery of the law by having no identifiable assets. You know the sort: he'll hire the most expensive lawyers money can buy to claim he is penniless.

Re:Wait... (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917989)

it is the American way.

Re:Wait... (3, Insightful)

Don_dumb (927108) | about 8 years ago | (#15917721)

Because, as TFA stated, Davis Wolfgang Hawke did not turn up at the trial and cannot be found (at least by AOL), but they do have reciepts that he had purchased gold at the time, they believe in order to survive litigation more effectively.

As much as I hate the spammer, I have to credit him that he was bright enough to know how to commit a lucrative crime. People who work average pay jobs but start profiting from fraud or theft, often expose themselves as they start turning up to work in Ferraris and buying big new houses, they just shout to the world "I am making too much money somehow". Patiently buying gold is a smart way to work, you just have to know when to quit so you can spend your cash, away from the scene of the crime. I guess DWH has done just this.

Personally, I can see the logic in hunting in the parents garden, as it seems he was living there when he was aquiring the gold. But isn't it more likely he has just taken them wherever he has gone?

property records, googlemaps, metal detector... (5, Interesting)

anticypher (48312) | about 8 years ago | (#15917798)

Yes, this is the type of criminal that is hard to pin down. He hasn't been convicted of a criminal offence, he just lost a civil case for scamming. He was smart enough to convert much of his ill gotten gains into easily hidden and transported precious metals, he never drove a flashy car or bought property which could be seized. He analyzed the risks and knew that the worst that could happen to him was forfeiture of his gains in a civil trial, so he purposefully worked to hide those gains.

Assuming he was smart, he has already moved some of the gold to another country and is living outside the US. What he buried on his parents property was safe for a while, and he could always return and dig it up as needed. What he didn't count on was AOL's private investigators finding his receipts for gold bars, which gave them a lead to how he hid his wealth.

Now AOL is trying to force his hand. If a large portion of the gold remains on his parent's property, he'll need to return and dig it up before AOL gets a court order. Presumably the property is under surveillance by private detectives who will get a share if they can detect exactly where the stash is hidden and give the courts precise information allowing a less costly recovery. AOL probably doesn't care much about getting the money for themselves as denying the spammer access to it. It sends a message to other spammers that no matter how hard they try to hide their wealth, AOL and the courts will eventually recover it.

It should be entertaining to see how many treasure hunters find his parent's property and start prospecting in the middle of the night. I'd expect after national news coverage like this, tonight there will be several new holes dug in his parents property, and within weeks most of the property will have been scanned by 'passers-by' who just happened to have a sensitive metal detector while taking a short cut from A to B. If AOL doesn't get in there soon, the gold will certainly be gone, either the parents know where it is and will recover it, the scammer will return some night to get it, or a treasure hunter will eventually get lucky.

I'm on the wrong continent, so I'll just sit back and wait for the first /.ers to post exact details of the parents property and .kmz files of the property in question. It shouldn't take long now.

the AC
US$600,000 per month!?! Damn, I'm in the wrong line of work. Curse my parents for raising me with a sense of morality

Re:property records, googlemaps, metal detector... (4, Funny)

Don_dumb (927108) | about 8 years ago | (#15917806)

Yeah we need some hi-res Google Earth photos, we could turn it into a battleships clone.

Re:Wait... (1)

91degrees (207121) | about 8 years ago | (#15918067)

But isn't it more likely he has just taken them wherever he has gone?

Perhaps, but gold isn't that portable. The value is somewhere between $500-$1000 per ounce, so at best, if he spent that $12million on gold, then he'd have to lug 750 pound of the stuff around with him. Not dsure I'd want to store that in a beat up old car.

He doesn't have any money (4, Insightful)

Colin Smith (2679) | about 8 years ago | (#15917737)

He converted it all to gold... Which isn't such a bad idea the way the dollar is devaluing. Then he disappeared, presumably to come back and get it when AOL have given up.

People are creatures of habit and familiarity, he's probably hidden it somewhere he's familiar with and is fairly sure it's unlikely to be disturbed. Places he's visited regularly, holidayed, relatives etc. The more often he's been there the greater the familiarity and the greater the chance he's hidden it there. AOL are going after the logical first target.

 

Why not just use shovels? (2, Insightful)

RuBLed (995686) | about 8 years ago | (#15917653)

"She said AOL's lawyer notified the family that the company intends to use bulldozers and geological teams to hunt for gold and platinum on their property."

I think it's a little bit of an overkill. If the article is true, the man just used shovels to hide the gold. Sounds like the ol' Gold Rush to me.

"AOL said it will try to accommodate Hawke's parents by not being too obtrusive."

lol

Re:Why not just use shovels? (4, Funny)

z0idberg (888892) | about 8 years ago | (#15917668)

> "AOL said it will try to accommodate Hawke's parents by not being too obtrusive."

Now that's what I call an abundance of sensitivity!

Re:Why not just use shovels? (1)

Don_dumb (927108) | about 8 years ago | (#15917738)

Sounds like the ol' Gold Rush to me"There's gold in them there nettles"

Re:Why not just use shovels? (1)

Ghost Hedgehog (814914) | about 8 years ago | (#15917820)

Bulldozers just give a better effect, it adds more drama. Hoppefully the idea of that when you do not have any may on the bank, you must have burried it somewhere, dies quickly.

Spammers vs AOL (5, Funny)

triorph (992939) | about 8 years ago | (#15917672)

man i don't know who to side against on this one, can't we rework this article to be like "innocent spam victim plans to take money back from evil spammer" or "AOL sues internet worker and destroys lawn looking for gold" man when the media isn't making it clear of what my opinion should be they're obviously not doing their job right

Re:Spammers vs AOL (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917997)

Having their lawn ruined will teach them to rear spammers.....

Oh Come On....... (1)

segedunum (883035) | about 8 years ago | (#15917675)

Does the date on that page say April 1st? This has got to be the best non-April 1st April Fool's story I've ever seen.

Oh well (5, Interesting)

Billosaur (927319) | about 8 years ago | (#15917678)

Greenbaum said her husband and father intend to challenge AOL's plans to dig on the family's property and search the family's 3,000-square-foot home. She said AOL's lawyer notified the family that the company intends to use bulldozers and geological teams to hunt for gold and platinum on their property.

AOL said it will try to accommodate Hawke's parents by not being too obtrusive.

As if bulldozers weren't obtrusive when they're tearing up your yard?

Is it possible for AOL to do anything even more stupid? Are they trying to set a record for stuipd things in a month? Never have the mighty fallen so far.

Re:Oh well (5, Funny)

kfg (145172) | about 8 years ago | (#15917760)

Are they trying to set a record for stuipd things in a month?

Well, the RIAA sued a dead person. Being number two I guess they feel they have to try harder.

KFG

Re:Oh well (1)

D-Cypell (446534) | about 8 years ago | (#15918065)

Perhaps AOL are just commisioning this project to demonstrate capability and win the contract to issue sopenas for the RIAA.

X marks the spot (2, Insightful)

spooky ghost (70606) | about 8 years ago | (#15917681)

And even if AOL lose they've marked the spot with a big X. There are going to be plenty of people believing that there is gold hidden on the property and they'll all be sneaking around and digging holes hoping to get a piece of the treasure. It'll be worse than an invasion of moles (or whatever the local burrowing creatures are.)

Re:X marks the spot (5, Funny)

LiquidCoooled (634315) | about 8 years ago | (#15917689)

It'll be worse than an invasion of moles (or whatever the local burrowing creatures are.)

I believe the burrowing creatures you refer to are known as lawyers.

Re:X marks the spot (1)

artson (728234) | about 8 years ago | (#15918062)

"And even if AOL lose they've marked the spot with a big X."

Yes, they did, didn't they? AOL has nice deep pockets which makes them pretty vulnerable to a suit for damages. Wouldn't it be fun to be the lawyer arguing for the parents' right to damages for the obvious damage AOL has done to their property, now and in the future?

Oh boy!

Yarrr.... (2, Funny)

Kazymyr (190114) | about 8 years ago | (#15917684)

Shiver me timbers! Mateys, now on to digging for the hidden pirate's treasure!

Re:Yarrr.... (2, Funny)

Silver Sloth (770927) | about 8 years ago | (#15917691)

But Ben Gunn moved it years ago!

Re:Yarrr.... (1)

Bazman (4849) | about 8 years ago | (#15917915)

Aww, they shoulda just waited until September 19th....

http://www.talklikeapirate.com/ [talklikeapirate.com]

Unless TV Has Lied to Me ... (3, Insightful)

hagrin (896731) | about 8 years ago | (#15917695)

... isn't there a way that they could use a helicopter equipped with metal detection devices to determine if anything is buried on the property without actually digging? (I'm pretty sure I saw this on a Law & Order: Criminal Intent once).

I would assume that a non-intrusive "search" of the property would at least be a middle ground between the two sides.

Re:Unless TV Has Lied to Me ... (4, Funny)

$RANDOMLUSER (804576) | about 8 years ago | (#15917747)

No - that was on Law and Order: Bad Science.

Re:Unless TV Has Lied to Me ... (1)

z0idberg (888892) | about 8 years ago | (#15917916)

Isn't that another name for CSI?

Re:Unless TV Has Lied to Me ... (1)

hublan (197388) | about 8 years ago | (#15918032)

There's a difference?

Unnecessary and too complicated (1)

Flying pig (925874) | about 8 years ago | (#15917830)

Archaeologists have plenty of equipment that would detect where the soil has been disturbed in the last few years and identify possible sites. I even got to try one out back in the 60s, and I am sure the state of the art is much advanced since then. My guess is that this is just AOL repeating the shock and awe tactics that have recently worked so well in Iraq and Lebanon - do not resist us or we will wreck your lives to the maximum extent.

Re:Unless TV Has Lied to Me ... (1)

pete-classic (75983) | about 8 years ago | (#15918008)

Inverse square law. Electromagnetic induction. Look 'em up.

-Peter

Re:Unless TV Has Lied to Me ... (1)

nwbvt (768631) | about 8 years ago | (#15918078)

I can see the use of a metal detector, but whats the helicopter for?

Sounds liek the RIAA again (1, Troll)

91degrees (207121) | about 8 years ago | (#15917696)

No matter how irritating spam is, does it really deserve such extreme aggressive measures to punish the guilty?

Perhaps those who agree with this are also the ones who agree that the RIAA are right to sue file sharers, but if not, isn't there a certain amount of hypocrisy here?

Re:Sounds liek the RIAA again (2, Insightful)

kfg (145172) | about 8 years ago | (#15917743)

. . .does it really deserve such extreme aggressive measures to punish the guilty?

Maybe, maybe not, but then they aren't punishing the guilty. They're punishing the guilty's parents without any real probable cause for believing the bars are actually on the property.

The parents claim that they're buried in the White Mountains somewhere not only sounds reasonable, but probable.

Oh, hey! I've got relatives in North Conway I can stay with. Hands off Washington, Jefferson and Monroe people. I claim them. They're mine! Mine! All mine! I'm a greedy little miser.

KFG

Re:Sounds liek the RIAA again (0, Flamebait)

Gwala (309968) | about 8 years ago | (#15917811)

No matter how irritating spam is, does it really deserve such extreme aggressive measures to punish the guilty?

In a word, yes.

Re:Sounds liek the RIAA again (-1, Flamebait)

Zzeep (682115) | about 8 years ago | (#15917814)

SPAM must be fought by all legal means possible. Spammers cause losses on an immense scale; all the time lost by people having to discard their SPAM, all the bandwidth, processing power on mailservers, etc. Spammers are thieves of the worst kind; it's like causing $100,000 worth of damage in a house to steal $1. In addition they write virusses to harvest email adresses. They operate large zombie networks to attack companies who try to fight spam. They try to hack every webserver to use as a spamhost. They're far more than just a nuisance, they're like the plague, and should be stopped at all cost. I rate them worse than drug dealers. Drug dealers at least see the people whom they destroy. Spammers are all the more despicable, thinking they can pull all this crap totaly anonymous. So yeah, let AOL do EVERYTHING they can to collect the millions the spammer illegally made. Go AOL, GO!

Re:Sounds liek the RIAA again (1)

91degrees (207121) | about 8 years ago | (#15917839)

Fair enough. I take it you're also of the same opinion about file sharers then.

Piracy must be fought by all legal means possible. Pirates cause losses on an immense scale; all the time lost by artists having missing sales. All the bandwidth, processing power on routers, etc. Pirates are thieves of the worst kind;

In addition they write virusses to harvest email adresses. They operate large zombie networks to attack companies who try to fight spam. They try to hack every webserver to use as a spamhost. They're far more than just a nuisance, they're like the plague, and should be stopped at all cost. I rate them worse than drug dealers. Drug dealers at least see the people whom they destroy. Spammers are all the more despicable, thinking they can pull all this crap totaly anonymous. So yeah, let AOL do EVERYTHING they can to collect the millions the spammer illegally made. Go AOL, GO!

Yeah. So you don't like virus writers.... Viruses are criminal damage. Why not prosecute for that?

Re:Sounds liek the RIAA again (2, Insightful)

Asic Eng (193332) | about 8 years ago | (#15917950)

Well according to the article the guy made $600,000 a month from illegal activities. So that makes him a big-time crook, and it seems reasonable for AOL to try to get the $12.8 million which they were awarded. I think most people on Slashdot would have some understanding for the RIAA's position if they were going after someone who was illegally producing CDs and making half a million from selling those every month.

Now that the parents of the culprit should have to suffer, is a different matter. They might be entirely innocent and really have no connection to the money. Then again AOL may be right with their suspicions. I hope the judge will come to a fair decision.

How things change (5, Funny)

DrXym (126579) | about 8 years ago | (#15917699)

AOL move from data mining to actual mining

Geez.. (1, Funny)

mtxmorph (669251) | about 8 years ago | (#15917703)

Is AOL really that strapped for money? To the point that they have to go digging it up? :)

Re:Geez.. (1)

Walt Dismal (534799) | about 8 years ago | (#15917741)

This explains the whining little voice I heard when I logged into AOL tonight: "You're got GOLD!"

You've got gold (1)

anticypher (48312) | about 8 years ago | (#15917901)

So I posted downthread about how I was going to sit back and wait for /.ers and treasure hunters to start posting .kmz files of the parent's property, and digging holes in the middle of the night. Then I went and looked at a few of the treasure hunter sites to see if they are ahead of /. in getting to the story first, and what did I find?

AOL has a new contest out called Gold Rush that started a few days ago. http://goldrush.aol.com/ [aol.com] (warning, flash, sound, possibly NSFW, datamining)

Its an advertising gimick to get people to watch AOL-TimeWarner TV shows in order to obtain clues embedded in the shows or commercials. The more confirmed personally identifying information you give them, the more clues they'll email to you. A spamme^H^H^H^H^H^H^H^Hn online marketer's dream database, also known as a suckers list.

The timing of this announcement strikes me as strange. Coincidence? I think not!

Maybe they need to get this spammer's gold for the prize

the AC

Damages (5, Funny)

thelonestranger (915343) | about 8 years ago | (#15917708)

AOL will not offer to pay for damages caused. However they will give them a one time discount of 50% on an AOL Broadband Platinum account for the first 3 months (Subject to a 12 month contract, standard terms, conditions and fair usage policy apply)

Oh come on! This is a real life treasure hunt! (2)

Colin Smith (2679) | about 8 years ago | (#15917711)

OK, you're AOL management, you've successfully sued a spammer and discover he's hidden all his "hard earned" assets as gold and platinum bars somewhere. If you had the opportunity, wouldn't you be out there with shovels helping to dig the place up? I know I would.

What they should do is offer a 10% fee for finding the treasure.

 

Dear Sirs, Madams.. (4, Funny)

Tracer_Bullet82 (766262) | about 8 years ago | (#15917718)

As you may have heard AOL is currently in the process of gold and platinum extraction from the lands of the Golde's estate.

We hear at Shark, Shark and Partners represent the Golde's estate. The estate firmly believe that the gold and platinum belong to people/s that have been victims of spam. Certainly not AOL.

with that in mind the estate would like to invite the public to be in a "treasure hunt". Unfortunately, due to obvious reasons, this cannot be open to all publics.

Hence we have selested a lucky few to be in the treasure hunt.
Only 400 has been invited.

Please reply to this e-mail to accept.

A processing fee of 20'000 will be required from each participant.

Yours truly.

Darl M.

P.s.. It's very sunny here in Chad. Hope to be vacationing with you next year here.

P.s.. A processing fee of 20'000 will be required from each participant. We are sure this ceratinly will be a drop
 

Tell them to look here (1)

$RANDOMLUSER (804576) | about 8 years ago | (#15917723)

"A good glass in the bishop's hostel in the devil's seat -- forty-one degrees and thirteen minutes -- northeast and by north -- main branch seventh limb east side -- shoot from the left eye of the death's-head -- a bee-line from the tree through the shot fifty feet out."
Problem solved.

Ha (3, Funny)

Ichigo Kurosaki (886802) | about 8 years ago | (#15917729)

Not if I get there first.

**grabs shovel**

Erm? (3, Funny)

ijakings (982830) | about 8 years ago | (#15917735)

Am I the only person here who read the story and thought "Did I get up in a parrallel timeline today?" It is the most random thing ive ever seen. ISP's digging spammers gardens up to look for buried treasure? Watch out AOL, Im sure a producer will be on you to make a movie out of this. You just cant make this sort of stuff up.

/2 (0, Offtopic)

Austaph (893218) | about 8 years ago | (#15917761)

[2. Trade] [AOL]: WTS ENCHANT /BRACER 5/7/9/GLOVE +/3/15/STAM!!! FIERY/ICY PST!! ! SPIRIT/STRENGTH! /15! +CHEST! /who AOL
[AOL]: Level 60 Undead Rogue - Hawke's Mom's Backyard
1 player total

Re:/2 (2, Funny)

technos (73414) | about 8 years ago | (#15918043)

[AOL]: Level 60 Undead Rogue - Hawke's Mom's Backyard

I always figured AOL for a Tauren myself. Big, slow-moving, funny looking, and not a whole lot of INT. :)

How long... (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917777)

before this hits Digg's front page? *coughs*

Charlie Murphy... (1)

just_another_sean (919159) | about 8 years ago | (#15917826)

You can't make this shit up...

Pirates of the Caribbean 4 - The Spammer's Chest (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917843)

Ok, just ask Capt. Sparrow for the crazy compass and solved. Easy and clean, no krakens, no octopus-faced villains.

wait a tick (1)

Nicaboker (978150) | about 8 years ago | (#15917868)

AOL can't even get privacy right, what makes anyone think they can work a back hoe or something as complicated as a shovel?

Urgent business opportunity (5, Funny)

gsasha (550394) | about 8 years ago | (#15917913)

Dear Sir,

This is Davis Wolfgang Hawke, an ex-spammer that lost a $12 million lawsuit from AOL, who are going to seize my $6 million in gold and platinum bars that I've hidden in the area of Boston, MA.

I need to recover the gold bars as soon as possible, before the AOL investigators get a chance to dig them up, however, I am unable to come back to US in fear of being arrested.

To this end, I'm seeking your cooperation. I'm willing to provide you with 10% share of the fortune, which is $600,000 dollars (sig hundred thousand dollars) in gold and platinum bars. Please, this business is extremely urgent and I will need your cooperation soon. I know you are a honest person, because I found your name in one of my extensively verified spam-lists, and I would like to conduct this business with you. You can remain confident that this business is completely safe as there is no risk for you whatsoever, only gains to be made. If you are willing to make this business with me, contact me at grep_shmep_20143@yahoo.com.

Best Regards,
Davis

Re:Urgent business opportunity (0, Offtopic)

stinky wizzleteats (552063) | about 8 years ago | (#15918033)

Dammit, you beat me to it. Well done.

Hawke (1)

Kev_Stewart (737140) | about 8 years ago | (#15917920)

...is a neo nazi [ratatak.com] , so he's bound to have some gold buried somewhere! Maybe a few long-lost works of art too?

;-)

Medfield, Ma (2, Interesting)

erbbysam (964606) | about 8 years ago | (#15917924)

I live and currently am typing this in Medfield and I have to say that this is one of the biggest things to happen to this town since Disney started using the name in all of his movies... Wiki page on medfield [wikipedia.org] There's only about 12,000 people in the town and I know exactly where that house is which kinda makes me want to take a walk with a shovel this weekend...

It's not just any gold (2, Funny)

spezz (150943) | about 8 years ago | (#15917942)

It's Nazi Gold [salon.com] .

The sweetest loot of all.

Spamming should be a life sentence (0)

Anonymous Coward | about 8 years ago | (#15917973)

Spamming is as bad as murder, and should be punished as such.

Seconds in a person's life:

70 * 365.25 * 24 * 60 * 60
= 2,209,032,000

Assuming everyone spends 2 minutes a day dealing with spam (120 seconds)
then the population needed for 1 lifetime to be wasted a day is:

2,209,032,000 / 120
= 18,408,600

Taking a rough estimate of half the UK+US population as active e-mail users being 180 million, it is now clear that spam kills 10 people a day.

Keeping AOL of your property (2, Funny)

gsn (989808) | about 8 years ago | (#15917978)

1) Declare Hunting Season open
2) Invite Dick Cheney
3) Invite AOL to come dig
4) Make commemorative buttons
5) Profit - Earn more than buried treasure is worth

(ducks)

Uh, metal detector? (1)

goodmanj (234846) | about 8 years ago | (#15918029)

Two questions:

1) Haven't these people heard of a metal detector?

2) Now that this is public, have the authorities or AOL taken steps to stop random people sneaking onto this poor family's property in the dead of night to do a little digging?

Ah, it's ironic... (4, Insightful)

Aphrika (756248) | about 8 years ago | (#15918037)

...if they dug up my back garden, they'd find 5 years worth of unsolicited ISP CDs they used to send me - oh, let's call them spam for the sake of argument - and bloody annoying they were too!

Hmmm ... (1)

NoSalt (801989) | about 8 years ago | (#15918048)

Is this a /. story or a Pirates of the Caribbean plot???

AOL used to spam too... (2, Insightful)

robizzle (975423) | about 8 years ago | (#15918052)

Just before I had enough floppy discs to do anything fun with, they switched to CDs.

When Sarcasm backfires. (1)

jellomizer (103300) | about 8 years ago | (#15918060)

I could just see it at a board meeting. AOL Is trying to find a revenu source. Some young guy goes well we could go looking for burried treasure. Then the managers stop and think about it walk out the room and in 5 minutes come back in with Patches on their eyes and Pirate hats, and yell "Arr Maty Treature!"

Profit!!! (-1, Redundant)

guruevi (827432) | about 8 years ago | (#15918073)

1: Make kid that chooses spamming as a career and let him bury some stuff in your backyard
2: Find out that "some stuff" is gold and platinum. Oppose digging works in court, dig up gold and platinum while you have to be in court
3: ???
4: Profit!!!
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