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Second Life & WoW Terrorist Training Camps?

CmdrTaco posted more than 7 years ago | from the you-gotta-be-kidding-me dept.

Your Rights Online 292

Tech.Luver writes "theinquirer reports that 'Aussie Security experts claim that Second Life and online games such as World of Warcraft are being used to train terrorists. Apparently there are three jihadi terrorists registered and two elite jihadist terrorist groups in Second Life and they use the site for recruiting and training. This is on top of the Second Life Liberation Army.""

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ROFLMAO (5, Funny)

SatanicPuppy (611928) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069815)

Oh noes!

How do you kill...that which has no life?

No seriously, I think I saw a video of them training once [] (nsfw). They're in yer raids, ninjaing your epic loots.

Some people are so damn stupid. What bearing could this possibly have on real life? The only thing I can think of is that you're increasing the fat, out of shape, cheetoes consuming segment of the terrorist population...Scary stuff. They do enough of this "training", we could neutralize them with a gift of free broadband and some jolt cola.

The only way I'll believe that this is real is if we start getting evidence of terrorist attacks on gold farmers.

Re:ROFLMAO (4, Funny)

dc29A (636871) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069917)

I *REALLY* hope they'll use WoW as a training camp. It's the only way we'll win this "War on Terror". The terrorists will be confused by very different laws of physics in the real world.

I can picture it already ... Terrorist sees an airplane, jumps on a bird thinking it has the same abilities as a netherdrake in WoW and tries to fly to intercept plane and make it crash with his Fireball rank XII spell. Or better, they'll work in gold farming sweatshops trying to "subvert" the "evil" western economies!

Re:ROFLMAO (1, Funny)

mdwh2 (535323) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070275)

On the other hand, I'm wondering if Bush will decide to invade WoW as part of the "War on Terror".

Is there any oil there?

Re:ROFLMAO (2, Funny)

PakProtector (115173) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070345)

On the other hand, I'm wondering if Bush will decide to invade WoW as part of the "War on Terror".

Is there any oil there?
Not since WarCraft II's expansion.


iknownuttin (1099999) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069929)

The only thing I can think of is that you're increasing the fat, out of shape, cheetoes consuming segment of the terrorist population...Scary stuff. They do enough of this "training", we could neutralize them with a gift of free broadband and some jolt cola.

That's assuming they leave their parent's basement.

Re:ROFLMAO (2, Funny)

dreamchaser (49529) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069967)

I didn't know that caves had basements!!!


Opportunist (166417) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070295)

Cave, basement, where's the difference?


thc69 (98798) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070163)

They don't all live in their parents' basements. Some start as married adults (but generally end up being more like single adolescent losers). Hey, come to think of it, isn't WoW a form of terrorism in the way it consistently destroys marriages?

Re:ROFLMAO (5, Funny)

dpilot (134227) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069935)

Come on, put your tinfoil hat on for a moment...

This means that Second Life and WoW have become terrorist-affiliated/terrorist-supporting orgainizations.
That means that everyone subscribing to Second Life or WoW now have financial links to terrorism.
Therefore :
    Everyone on Second Life and WoW is open game for DHS, warrantless wiretaps, asset freezing, etc.

(silly sarcasm, frightening Orwellian reality, or absurd conspiracy theory, you decide.)


SatanicPuppy (611928) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069989)

Yea, wiretapping WoW would get you awesome intel. I wonder how you say "Wait for sunders!" in Arabic? Wonder if the terrorists play Alliance or Horde? On the one hand they want to be scary, but on the other hand, I think deep down they feel pretty, oh so pretty.

Re:ROFLMAO (5, Funny)

tehcyder (746570) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070265)

Come on, put your tinfoil hat on for a moment...
What, you mean you take yours off sometimes?!

Re:ROFLMAO (2, Interesting)

Cheesey (70139) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070405)

Homeland Security are way ahead of you [] . Only a terrorist would object to being forced to run official spyware!

Take the next step.. (1)

nurb432 (527695) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070519)

Don't forget that pirates that fund terrorism use the internet.. so everyone that is on line is aiding and subject to governmental investigation.

Oh, and they use roads, to get to and fro.. so that pretty much covers the ones that aren't on line.


Djatha (848102) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070003)

Right, now the army can take the war on terror to Second Life. To save our beloved children, our freedom to be a pervert, to life the American Dream till the bits run out, of course.

Wait, I kind of like that idea: lets make war virtual

Nevertheless, I wonder, would children of high rank politicians and business people join the ranks of The Virtual Army of America to defend our Virtual Homeland, to show their courage, to show that they are as worthy as their parents to lead this country to hell (virtually of course)

Re:Oh noez (1)

TheMeuge (645043) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070045)

Oh no... terrorists also use their tongues to speak. Quick, cut the tongues of everyone you think is a terrorist...

Oh no twice... terrorists use cars for bombs and transportation! Quick - destroy all cars, and cease manufacturing any new ones that are not STRICTLY for the use by Police, TSA, DHS, and RIAA...

Re:ROFLMAO (2, Insightful)

SnoopJeDi (859765) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070077)

What bearing could this possibly have on real life? The only thing I can think of...
Don't lock yourself out of investing what could be a genuine point, just because the premises are completely ridiculous.

Granted, I didn't really buy this when I first read it, especially the bit about using WoW as a training tool. But to be honest, not all terrorist training has to be violent. Terrorism is about guerilla warfare, and guerilla warfare has been around for centuries. It's an art, just like any other form of war, and it does have it's own subtleties.

I assume that if WoW really is being used for "training," it's for things like team dynamics. Who performs better as a leader? Who is a quicker thinker? When does communication between team members become a problem?

The Second Life stuff is obviously more "real" than the supposed WoW training, although I'm not buying this BS about "registered" terrorist organizations. To me, that just sounds like some people having a bit of "fun" playing terrorist. The complete lack of any names of these terrorist groups in the article screams to me that they aren't really terrorist groups.

Again, don't put it out of your mind just because you can't rack your brain hard enough to find a valid use. If you're not an analyst, being paid to do it all day long, you might just miss something small and subtle. (disclaimer: I have no knowledge of anything remotely related to analysis/terrorism/etc. I'm just a geek.)

Eh. (4, Insightful)

SatanicPuppy (611928) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070197)

But WoW would be useless for that, as compared to a game of "Capture the Flag" played out in the sticks, or even in the cities. It teaches you nothing about real-world communications problems, nothing about the real fear and uncertainty of being in the world, waiting for something to happen, nothing about tactics against humans.

WoW tactics boil down to tactics vs mobs, and tactics vs mobs. In the first you're fighting a bunch of simplistic AI, and in the second you're fighting a bunch of people who know they're not going to lose anything if they die, so they just do the lemming over and over until one side wins...It's a joke.

I can think of a thousand "games" that you could play in the real world that would actually get you useful skills, and useful training. Playing WoW, on the other hand, gives you the wrong kind of reflexes, zero physical conditioning, and no actual experience with moving around in the world.

Re:Eh. (5, Funny)

Opportunist (166417) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070331)

Sorry, sir. This is terrorhype. Logic and reason is in the next room.

Re:Eh. (1)

Hijacked Public (999535) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070353)


I suspect the paintball facilities will be shut down before WoW, if the people doing the shutting down have any sense, which they might not.

Re:Eh. (1)

CommunistHamster (949406) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070441)

Well, the Violent Crime Reduction Act (VCRA) in the UK has really started to put the cramp on paintball and airsoft collectors, skirmishers, retailers and site operators, even though their "weapons" are next to harmless and never even moderately injured anyone playing sensibly.

So, next up on the news: Terrorists are training for battles using paintball markers. "Paintball should be banned!" says Politician X.

Re:Eh. (1)

SatanicPuppy (611928) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070547)

Pointless. A good game of soccer or dodgeball would be equally good "training". Improves coordination both personal and group, builds muscle and cardiovascular strength.

It's impossible to ban enough stuff to make it impossible for them to train themselves. The only way to win is to make them not want to train.


Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20070177)

I would like to apollogise to the families of all the FurBlogs, Gnalpiles, Murlocks, and Despin Highwaymen I have lead low level geneocial parties against. I had no idea it was for real, ;(

with strange aeons... ;) (1)

Moraelin (679338) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070427)

Oh noes!

How do you kill...that which has no life?

"That is not dead which can eternal lie, and with strange aeons even death may die." -- H.P. Lovecraft

Re:ROFLMAO (5, Funny)

Hoi Polloi (522990) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070575)

When the FBI came for the trolls,
I remained silent;
I was not a troll.

When they locked up the orcs,
I remained silent;
I was not an orc.

When they came for the dark elves,
I did not speak out;
I was not a dark elf.

When they came for me,
there was no one left to subscribe.

I knew it! (1)

Spudtrooper (1073512) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069823)

I just knew there was something fishy about that bukkake garden!

Re:I knew it! (2, Funny)

clickclickdrone (964164) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069889)

>I just knew there was something fishy about that bukkake garden!
They'll come to a sticky end, no doubt.

Re:I knew it! (1)

Das Modell (969371) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070211)

A sticky end [] , you say?

I thought (3, Funny)

saibot834 (1061528) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069835)

And I thought they were trained in those small trucks (Powell showed us) in Iraq. I was wrong. They are trained in the tubes.

Re:I thought (1)

CaptnMArk (9003) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070525)

Hmm, is there a game with a Toyota pickup truck?

Wow (5, Funny)

thatskinnyguy (1129515) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069859)

This is news... The terrorists have less of a life than we do!

Irak (1, Funny)

CmdrGravy (645153) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069865)

I thought Iraq was the main terrorist training camp, now that they can use 2nd life instead I'd expect things to calm down there a lot.

Re:Irak (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20070095)

Bush will declare war, and try to get tanks in second life, but won't be able to figure out why he can't get a tube big enough to shove a tank into, connected to the internets!

Re:Irak (1)

Lurker2288 (995635) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070261)

We have to fight the enemy in Second Life so we don't have to fight them in Iraq so we don't have to fight them here!

Gotta be -1 redundant (4, Funny)

Himring (646324) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069877) the time I post this:

If you play wow, you're supporting the terrorists!


So that's where they kept the WMDs.... In Ironforge!

Re:Gotta be -1 redundant (1)

Agent Green (231202) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070455)

WMD = Warcraft of Mass Destruction?

Second life terrorists? (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20069883)

I'll believe it when I see a national landmark knocked over by a flying penis.

I KNEW IT! (1)

rubberbandball (1076739) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069887)

this completely explains osama bin laden's latest video, where he stomps grounding totems while enchanting AK-47s with +5 weapon damage.

also, when did we as a country stop blaming FPS games for violence and start blaming magical elves?

can't we all just mine some gold? (1)

conspirator57 (1123519) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069899)

or was that supposed to be "get along"? whatev.

OMG (5, Interesting)

ruiner13 (527499) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069901)

Wow, and you know what? There are even MORE terrorists training in this thing we call "real life"! Can you believe it? We'd better end this thing called life before they have a chance to do something!

All kidding aside, I bet there are "terrorists" using any form of communication that is there. Unless we live completely isolationist lives, never being allowed to interact with anyone, ever, people are going to *gasp* get together and talk about things, including terrorism. Focusing on video games is just stupid and a colossal waste of time.

Slow news (4, Insightful)

Zephiria (941257) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069903)

You have to wonder about how someone can live with themselves for typing up this garbage, they go to collage do all sorts of stuff... and then this? People are blowing up corporate crap in SL because they don't WANT you there. As for using weapons in WoW to train for Rl? Uh where's my exploding sheep? :P

Re:Slow news (1)

Tofystedeth (1076755) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070019)

Unlike much of WoW, the exploding sheep is not that hard to emulate in real life...

Re:Slow news (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20070047)

they go to collage do all sorts of stuff...
Like learn how to spell and form sentences that make sense?

Bug or Feature? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20069905)


The latest version of WoW now allows you to fight REAL TERRORISTS!! Experience the realism, the feeling of danger.. explore the mind of the insanely fanatic!

Sounds like a feature to me! True evildoers in a game.

Alliance or Horde? (5, Funny)

andrewd18 (989408) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069931)

The real question here is, "Is the US Military the Alliance or the Horde?"

Re:Alliance or Horde? (1)

churchofthenewepoch (1135447) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070053)

Well I can't tell you what side their on, but: If they role Alliance: N.E. or Gnome If Horde: B.E. Profs would have to be mining and herbalism, in order to fund the operation. Anyone have an idea for the tabbord?

Re:Alliance or Horde? (1)

LiquidHAL (801263) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070091)

Durnholde Keep in Old Hillsbrad = Guantanamo Bay

Which means whenever you beat the instance, you're completing a terrorist training program to help free their leaders from US custody.

Re:Alliance or Horde? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20070093)

Actually both. Have you played WoW? There are is a very large military population in game.

Re:Alliance or Horde? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20070371)


Re:Alliance or Horde? (3, Funny)

Hambone_dot_exe (963408) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070555)

"...A formal investigation was announced today by Northshire Township Marshall Lunde following the alleged incidents at what is now being called 'Kobold-Ghraib.'"

"Demihuman Rights Commission workers denounced the actions of low-ranking Paladins who were wintessed assaulting non-combatant kobold workers, but were quick to blame a military and civilian command which they say creates an atmosphere of deniability."

"The word they used was 'exterminate,' reported one novice, who spoke on the condition of anonymity. 'They told us that the only way to advance was to walk into the mine, stomp on a bunch of civilians, and then bring back their candles. Besides, do you know what the resale value on a candle is?'"

"In light of these actions, animal-rights activists are also planning litigation against a dwarvish hunter's guild for what they describe as a 'wanton slaughter of a noble and endangered species of non-aggressive wolf,' resulting in the slaughter of dozens of the animals, who were then harvested for their ruined pelts, broken fangs and stringy wolf meat."

"Stormwind officials declined comment and could not be reached for an interview at the time of this story."

"Kobold delegates were quoted as saying, 'you no take candle.'"

Named mobs, rare loot (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20069961)

It all makes sense now, the insurgents aren't fighting for political or religious reason, they're farming our soldiers for rare drops! And the reason they seem so eager to sacrifice a bunch of their own to kill one American soldier is because they've got rezzers on their teams.

The insidious bastards, applying WoW tactics to real life.

Spoof (1)

styryx (952942) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069963)

As much as I would like to comment on the state of the world and the absurdity of "security" "experts" (each requiring quotation marks to indicate irony), it looks to me as if that article is a spoof.

Re:Spoof (2, Informative)

Bonobo_Unknown (925651) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070245)

Australian "security experts" (aka Federal Police) being particularly vulnerable right now. []

Re:Spoof (1)

Rogerborg (306625) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070473)

WTF are you talking about? He clearly impregnated his wife 9 months before the failed attacks, just so that he'd have an excuse to fly from Australia to India. We'll never beat The Terrorists until we stop underestimating them.

Re:Spoof (1)

Opportunist (166417) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070377)

If it's not, some "security expert" should better not quit his day job.

I'd like to be the first person (5, Insightful)

Petey_Alchemist (711672) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069971)

Who has been *called* a Second Life terrorist to debunk this rumor.

The SLLA isn't a real "terrorist" organization. It's a bunch of unfunny people who think that exploding picture replicators near buildings in SL comprises some sort of Jacobin revolution. I'm serious. Look at their white paper.

As for real terrorists: frankly, I hope they're practicing in Second Life. Because with all the other, harder-to-track ways they could be communicating information--IRC channels, encrypted and hidden forums, custom IM software, etc--they choose to use a public program in which anyone can access anywhere by default and the company religiously logs any and all chats that pass through their network and make it a point to discipline people on the basis of chatlogs.

So we should be so lucky to have terrorists so stupid that they'd communicate using SL--a clunky graphically terrible product that can't even properly form eyebrows, much less a complex trigger mechanism--as opposed to, say, sending a real video over some other quicker undetectable means.

Re:I'd like to be the first person (3, Insightful)

SatanicPuppy (611928) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070087)

Hey, stop with your "facts" and "logic"! Didn't you hear? There are terrorists in WoW and Second Life! Do you know what this means?!?

This countries supply of WoW gold and online poontang is in jeopardy! They are attacking our very way of life! We must mobilize for action! It's not going to be easy. I've heard that the terrorists are employing epic mounts, and exploding sheep technology, as well as second generation teledildonics, but we must not let them prevail!

We will fight them in the empty casinos! We will fight them in the level 60 raid instances that no one does anymore! We shall overcome!

We need an inside man, some human intel... (5, Funny)

Dareth (47614) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069981)

And we have the perfect operative for the job. Someone who can blend in with the terrorist and provide this intel.

The only agent for this job is none other than LEEROY JENKINS [] !

Re:We need an inside man, some human intel... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20070501)

That's some quality spam, d00d!

The answer? (1)

p4rri11iz3r (1084543) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069991)

So in order to fight these terrorists, we should all go on a burning crusade?

I'm sorry, I don't feel right about that at all.

Suddenly everything is clear (3, Insightful)

Xest (935314) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069993)

So that's why the bombs in London and the Glasgow airport attack the other week failed miserably.

They thought their spell of detonation and shield of fire protection worked outside the game too.

So why doesn't (1)

gillbates (106458) | more than 7 years ago | (#20069997)

the FBI take the easy route and bust them in WoW or Second Life...

Australia? (1)

Bobzibub (20561) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070029)

Would they have considered their entire country to be a terrorist training camp if they applied their modern standards to their early country?

(Also, is there a reason the CAPTCHA word is "convicts"?)

I call bullshit (1)

thomas.prebble (1125281) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070031)

Especially after the Haneef scandal. American and Australian intelligence is not to be trusted.

You can't make this stuff up (5, Insightful)

mdwh2 (535323) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070035)

When we had the stories of criminalising people for fictional virtual pr0n in online environments, one of the responses to show how ludicrous this is was to suggest we start criminalising WoW players for virtual murder...

It's sad that everytime someone says "But you can't stop X, otherwise we might as well crack down on Y too, which would be silly", it's not long before Y becomes the Internet taboo which people also want to crack down upon...

Please tell me this story is just a parody?

april fools, a little late (1)

SirSmiley (845591) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070041)

Seriously though, I read the title and it would be something to expect on April 1st. "Terrorists are able to simulate real life weapons in World of Warcraft", yes because we know all terrorists can learn hand to hand combat via a video game where you click on a target and it mindlessly starts hacking away

This is why we thought Iraq had WMDs (1)

ACMENEWSLLC (940904) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070051)

We were spying on Iraq and listening to conversations between Saddam Hussein and his generals. We overheard Hussein mentioning that he had WMDs to his generals. This is the *intelligence* we had that led us to believe he had WMDs.

In all likelihood, they were playing one of the various war MMOs or online games and training. So when when we were listening, the context was lost.

The lessen learned is that playing online games can lead to off line wars.

(Of course, I'm being a bit sarcastic here.)

Re:This is why we thought Iraq had WMDs (1)

mdwh2 (535323) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070357)

The lessen learned is that playing online games can lead to off line wars.

On a similar note, just as people blame computer games for violent behaviour, I think we should blame games like Civilization for causing our world leaders to develop a thirst for war.

See those juicy oil resource squares? Why, we'd better invade. My words are backed with nuculear weapons!

Re:This is why we thought Iraq had WMDs (1)

Opportunist (166417) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070469)

I've said it years ago, they just listened to Saddam telling his Generals that his WMDs are ready to go in a bit and he just gotta hold them back a little longer.

What they didn't know is that he and his Generals were playing C&C Generals. I mean, it sure as hell beats real war...

Virtual Wiretaps (1)

mulhollandj (807571) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070065)

If you see gnomes spending too much time at the mailbox then they are probably characters of government employees reading others mail.

When I heard (1)

future assassin (639396) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070081)

"Jihad Jihad" in Lineage 2 coming from one of the clan leaders while flying this dragon over Oren Castle I knew something was not right.

It's true! (5, Funny)

Experiment 626 (698257) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070083)

It's true. According to documents recently captured by the CIA, some of the plots they are working on include:

  • "Get up to 375 in Goblin Engineering so we can build better improvised explosive devices"
  • "Crash epic flying mounts into buildings instead of airliners"
  • "Build a Mana Bomb like those blood elves east of Shattrath City have"
  • "Stock up on +sneak gear and enchants so we can stealth past the Secret Service and crit-backstab President Bush"
  • "Recruit an Enchanter to our cause so we can get Fiery cast on our AK-47's, for the nice glow and DPS increase" (Bin Laden vetoed this one, saying "You can only put enchants on melee weapons, n00b")

Re:It's true! (1)

morari (1080535) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070361)

"Stock up on +sneak gear and enchants so we can stealth past the Secret Service and crit-backstab President Bush"
If wanting to see that makes one a terrorist, then all I have to say is "Jihad"!

WoW trained terrorists (5, Funny)

jayhawk88 (160512) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070113)

Baffling news today from the West Bank, where officials arrested six terrorists who were attempting to attack a local market. Apparently the terrorists tried to execute their attack by teasing several vicious dogs they found wandering in a nearby alley, then leading the dogs to the market as they ran towards it. Witnesses say that the terrorists ran into the market, waited until the dogs were right on top of them, then attempted to confuse the dogs in various ways. One terrorist wrapped himself in a camoflage cloak and hid behind a fruit vendors stand, while several others simply laid on the ground and played dead. All six terrorists were hospitalized with bite and claw wounds to their face and arms.

Re:WoW trained terrorists (1)

maz2331 (1104901) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070273)

Patriotic Pups! Who would have guessed?

aussies are known liars (1)

cinnamon colbert (732724) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070121)

recent case of dr haneeef, the security forces lied - as was shown in open court - about what suspect said under interrogation.

aussies no better then bush, actually worse, consider treatmetn of aborigines

The /b/utlerian jihad (1, Insightful)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20070123)

'jihad' is the new 'hittler'. Social mutants need something capable of eliciting a shocked response from people who aren't a member of their social group. Kids using extremist tags simply recognized it as a code word that is beyond the acceptable and practically guaranteed to get exactly the sort of response they are getting.

Terrorists are also training using BF2142 (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20070137)

When EMP weapons, hovertanks, and mechanized walkers become available on the battlefield, they will be ready.

I hear they don't yet have the discipline to wait patiently for aircraft without many teamkills, but given time and unlocks they may become a formidable force.

Can't wait (1)

ArcadeX (866171) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070139)

next audio tape from osama will let us know we're going to be 'pwnd'.

Great! (2, Funny)

schiefaw (552727) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070141)

Once they get playing they won't be willing to quit long enough to attack in real life.

"Ahmad, we must go fight the Americans now."
"Maybe later, I am in an instance."

And the OLPC will be used for guerilla warfare... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 7 years ago | (#20070145)

I wonder, would now be a good time to revisit my criticism that the OLPC laptops could easily be stolen my militias, and reflashed with survival manuals, cartography software, and secure mesh networking communication protocols?

I figure people will either take me seriously, or get a good laugh. Either way seems like a net benefit for humanity :)

Best ... PR move ... Ever.... (1)

gzerphey (1006177) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070175)

Play Guild Wars. No monthly fee and terrorist free since 2005!!!

Re:Best ... PR move ... Ever.... (1)

andrewd18 (989408) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070213)

LOL. I'm so making that my guild's MOTD when I get home tonight.

Ok, smoke 'em out.. (1, Funny)

jcr (53032) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070185)

How much work is it to make a koran and a toilet in Second Life?


somebody call Jack! (4, Funny)

Lurker2288 (995635) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070217)

ACTUAL bad guys learning and practicing their horrific murder skills in a virtual environment?

Somewhere, Jack Thompson just got a chubby.

Tomorrow's page 1 article (1)

Dancindan84 (1056246) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070225)

Jihadist's PoM Pyroblast crits an M1A1 for 13,000 HP M1A1 assplodes Think of the children.

So what does that make me??? (1)

Lumpy (12016) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070231)

I play Command and Conquer Generals almost all the time.

While I prefer to play as China and nuke the crap out of everything. I also like to play as GLA and send waves of suicide bombers at the other players bases. (Almost everyone likes to play as USA, how boring having to adhere to rules of war.)

cince games like C&C are FAR FAR better at training for strategy than the other two and also match the tools that the terrorists use, wouldn't decent strategy games like that work better?

As soon as... (1)

Opportunist (166417) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070267)

As soon as a computer virus can infect a human being, as soon as code can break down a real life store, we'll talk about it.

'til then, excuse me while I spend my time with something more meaningful. Like, counting the tiles on the ceiling.

Secondlife? (1)

jandrese (485) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070287)

Unless they're training to become furries or bondage queens I don't think we have to worry too much about SL. Seriously, it's not like you can learn to fly a jet or something in there (the vehicle controls are way too primitive), and it's not like SL behaves like the real world in most ways--you can detach your point of view and have it fly around for instance, or you can just fly around yourself. So what does that leave? Well, you can use it as a glorified chat channel, which seems fairly pointless. Also, the steep system and bandwidth requirements mean that you need to not be in some place that ends in -stan to even get in.

Last thing I need to hear ... (2, Funny)

YetAnotherProgrammer (1075287) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070321)

when on a plane being hijacked. "We are the 1337 jihad. All your planes are belong to us. You just got pwn3d."

A good start (1)

russotto (537200) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070343)

Get these terrorists hooked on WoW, and they'll lose their will to do REAL terrorism. Even if they don't, their loss of muscle tone and weight gain will make them quite ineffective, barely able to hold an AK-47 much less fire it. Suicide bombers will be too weak to stand with their bombs on. And their pale skin will make them the laughingstock of all the other Arabs.

Second Life Terrorists (3, Funny)

Ray Radlein (711289) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070385)

We must remain vigilant: This could be provide all the training would-be terrorists need to run around buying furry porn, attachable penises, and sparkly glowy rotating particle effects in real life.

WoW Training Day? HAHA! (1)

DJ_Maiko (1044980) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070445)

Kevin Zuccato, head of the Australian High Tech Crime Centre in Canberra, says terrorists can gain training in games such as World of Warcraft in a simulated environment, using weapons that are identical to real-world armaments.
Oh yea, I'm shivering in my boots as I await getting attacked by goblin-engineered bombs, rusty daggers & getting MC'ed (mind controlled)!!! /shiver

Look at the bright side... (1)

DaveJ2001 (559498) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070453)

At least they aren't using America's Army.

Re:Look at the bright side... (2, Funny)

Dancindan84 (1056246) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070559)

Or counter-strike. God help us if they figure out that running with their knives out is faster.

Yes, but can they get to the boss without wiping? (1)

Xanthvar (1046980) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070507)

This article is frigging hilarious. I wonder what kind of weapons they are training with in WoW, that will make them better. I'm sure that all the coalition forces will be very scared to see a guy swinging something called [Whirt's Third Leg] coming at them, rather than using an [RPG]

Ah yes, I can see it now....

CoolMartyr: LuvztoJihadd, we are planning a raid, on the Devil Pig camp. Can you go tonight?

LuvztoJihadd: No, I am not keyed for it yet. My Al Qaeda faction rep is not high enough, and I am still trying to get the [Martyr's Blessed Explosives Vest] to drop in Iraq-temple.

CoolMartyr: Oh noes! We really need you to tank for us tonight. The other guys can't keep the Marines turned around long enough to keep them from breathing on us, and then we keep getting caught in the Air Support blasts, that keep wiping us. Last night my repair bill was over 20 gold.

LuvztoJihadd: I am sorry. I cannot get anymore rep from the flag burning repeatable quest. We need to go on some more instances so I can get my rep up.

CoolMartyr: What about your cousin? Can he go?

LuvztoJihadd: No. He just started the quest chain. You know, the one where you put nails in a container of gasoline, but it doesn't do anything? We was complaining, that he spend all his gold on the gasoline, and now he doesn't have enough gold to train, and he is still using the [Bent AK] for his main weapon, so he can't do enough damage to the Infidel Grunts to get any farther.

CoolMartyr: Damn it! Why can't anyone in our guild spend enough time to get enough rep so we can move on to the really cool instances? I am tired of wiping on the Marines all the time. I want to do end game raids, and kill the Great Satan.

LuvztoJihadd: I know. Maybe we should try playing SL some time. I hear there you can actually make money doing stuff. It has to be better than farming for gold all the time.

CoolMartyr: I have to go, my bed is telling me to get off the computer and go to bed. He says he needs it to work on some dumb digital Pearl Harbor project.

CoolMartyr has gone offline.

LuvztoJihadd: Lamer

LuvztoJihadd has gone offline.

This is so True! (1)

4iedBandit (133211) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070513)

Just the other night the wife and I were in a pick up group for Zul Far'rak and there was this Tauren Druid who was like...suicidal! He didn't have any care for survival! He just ran into everything in bear form! No care at all if he lived through it! He must have been a terrorist in training!

Or a ten year old half-wit...

Na, couldn't be that. He was a terrorist!

Second Jihad .. (1)

rs232 (849320) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070521)

Now if they would only fight their terrorist wars in SecondLife, wouldn't that be just peachy. That way I would only have to contend with the maintenance crew the next time I take a tube ride. Engines keep falling off, glue on the electric rails ignites etc. I'd much prefer if the gov didn't announce the next security threat, ignorance is bliss ...

I don't understand why they have to choose, Secondlife, couldn't they fork out on a Counterstrike server. After all I would have thought they would want to keep the 'training' secret.

Oblig. (1)

ssvensso (1018410) | more than 7 years ago | (#20070553)

I for one welcome our new digitally trained islamic-fundamentalist elf overlords
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