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324 comments

Don't tell John Carmack! (5, Funny)

Zymergy (803632) | more than 6 years ago | (#22077920)

He will incorporate this new 'blackest' black into Doom 4.
(and you just thought you saw all possible shades of black and brown in Doom 3!)

Re:Don't tell John Carmack! (5, Funny)

Tim99 (984437) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078048)

For older readers - Hotblack Desiato, Disaster Area, and the totally black ship in "The Restaurant at the End of the Universe":

Every time you try to operate one of these weird black controls that are labelled in black on a black background, a little black light lights up black to let you know you have done it.
http://everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=535094 [everything2.com]

Re:Don't tell John Carmack! (1)

cheater512 (783349) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078500)

Older readers? I'm young you insensitive clod!

Such a pity more young people havent read it.
There are so many references to the books everywhere.

Re:Don't tell John Carmack! (2, Insightful)

rucs_hack (784150) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078574)


Such a pity more young people havent read it.
There are so many references to the books everywhere.


Such a pity that so many people think Hitch-Hikers guide is just a book, and don't know about the Radio show from which it came.

Re:Don't tell John Carmack! (1)

torpor (458) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078682)

Or the TV show which has its own charm too .. such as the best Marvin you're likely to ever see ..

Re:Don't tell John Carmack! (2, Funny)

nospam007 (722110) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078748)

They could only produce them dark nanotubes because their nanogenerator goes to 11.

Re:Don't tell John Carmack! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078240)

The Jedi thought they destroyed me when they cut off my head, but my minions have done as I directed and attached my head to my network of creations with dark nanotechnology. Instead of destroying me they have increased my power, now I am Sith Lord Darth Doom.

Re:Don't tell John Carmack! (1)

mrgsd (668128) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078294)

What could possibly be more black than #000000 [bash.org] ?

Re:Don't tell John Carmack! (1)

Propaganda13 (312548) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078594)

How about #0000000?

Paint (5, Funny)

milsoRgen (1016505) | more than 6 years ago | (#22077948)

I can't wait to paint my nerd den with this stuff... light be damned!

Re:Paint (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22077982)

Forget that, real geeks use dark matter to paint their walls. 99.9% just ain't good enough :)

Where's my fuligin? (2, Interesting)

category_five (814174) | more than 6 years ago | (#22077966)

I can't wait to get my fuligin cloak!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Book_of_the_New_Sun/ [wikipedia.org]

Oh wow - an darker shade of black... (4, Funny)

h4rm0ny (722443) | more than 6 years ago | (#22077976)

... can we get a screenshot?

Re:Oh wow - an darker shade of black... (0, Redundant)

ZorbaTHut (126196) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078018)

Just click here [slashdot.org] , then turn your screen off.

Re:Oh wow - an darker shade of black... (2, Funny)

Thanshin (1188877) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078210)

... can we get a screenshot?
Why of course we you can. Close your eyes and count to ten.

Re:Oh wow - an darker shade of black... (5, Informative)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078402)

Close your eyes and count to ten.
No, that would be eigengrau [wikipedia.org] .

Re:Oh wow - an darker shade of black... (1)

oliverthered (187439) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078652)

I shut my eyes the other night to get to sleep and a bright light appeared, so bright that I had to open my eyes again to get ridd of it.

Re:Oh wow - an darker shade of black... (1)

dintech (998802) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078724)

Actually this kind of thing is pretty common while falling asleep. It happens to me too and is absolutely nothing to worry about, especially if you're not still seeing it now. Don't worry, your retina is probably still attached to the back of your eye.

Re:Oh wow - an darker shade of black... (2, Funny)

minginqunt (225413) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078386)

What material could be darker?

None. None more dark.

Re:Oh wow - an darker shade of black... (2)

complete loony (663508) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078746)

Perfect for any Box of Orden.

Re:Oh wow - an darker shade of black... (2, Informative)

TapeCutter (624760) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078398)

"can we get a screenshot?"

Here ya go. [ibiblio.org]

Re:Oh wow - an darker shade of black... (5, Informative)

Johnno74 (252399) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078522)

This [news.com.au] story has a photo (seriously)

Pretty cool stuff. The sample on the left is carbon black, which is reasonably black, but the surface still texture stands out clearly with the flash. The sample of the new material looks like a black hole - which I guess it almost is. Except for the suckage.

wouldn't scattered light still be light? (3, Insightful)

XaXXon (202882) | more than 6 years ago | (#22077980)

wouldn't it just be less 'mirror-like' and more matte if it scatters light? In order to be black from all angles, it would have to absorb all the energy. ?

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (4, Informative)

Psychotria (953670) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078082)

The summary seems to be wrong. No where in the article does it say the material "scatters light". Rather, it absorbs light.

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (1)

sholden (12227) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078194)

An error in a slashdot summary, it's the end of the world!!!

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (1)

KlaymenDK (713149) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078202)

In order to be black from all angles, it would have to absorb all the energy.
That's what I'm wondering -- if indeed it absorbs all light energy, would it not get awfully hot? I'm thinking that unless you actually have serious cooling behind it (as in a steam solar cell) a panel of this stuff would be a fire hazard to its surroundings.

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (1)

QuantumG (50515) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078224)

black object gets hot when placed in sunlight.. I've never heard of such a thing.

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (1)

KlaymenDK (713149) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078304)

Spare your sarcasm.

What I'm wondering is how much hotter than a "regularly black" panel one of these would become. There's a difference between being visibly black (which basically means it just reflects an unimpressive but equal amount of all wavelenghts) and actually absorbing all light.

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (1)

Psychotria (953670) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078332)

I am not sure the black object gets hot; rather, the object converts more electromagnetic radiation into heat--it's not the object that is hot, it is a side-effect of the object being black. What I am trying to say is that it's not the object that is generating the heat, but the blackness of the object... yes, this sounds kind of vague.

If I was remotely religious I'd be touting that from darkness there comes light. But I am not. So erase that last sentence.

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (1)

Chrisq (894406) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078494)

You must work for the automotive industry. I was fool enough to buy a black car with black vinyl seats.........

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (3, Interesting)

protobion (870000) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078290)

Yes but the point is , we wont let the material burn itself and everything around it. The material would start to get hot, but we will couple it to a thermoelectric/sterling etc. engine to generate power from the absorbed energy. The tubes should reach some steady state temperature and we have theoretically much more efficient light-based power source.

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (1)

XaXXon (202882) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078306)

it can radiate it off as heat. that's fine -- no conservation issues. I should have RTFA, though before asking about scattering..

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (1)

Dulcise (840718) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078496)

Lets hope it does, because maybe it will have applications in renewable energy :)

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (1)

Eivind (15695) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078572)

How do you figure that ? If you absorb 99.9% of all light, then you are heated 10% more than some normal black material that "only" absorbs 90%. So what ? No big deal. Okay, where the "normal" black material reaches equilibrium with its surroundings at 70 degrees F, this thing may be 75 degrees F, who cares ?

Being black does not mean it won't radiate. It'll radiate and cool just as well as any other object. (infact nanotubes can be -very- good conductors of heat)

I'm thinking you failed physics 101.

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (1)

KlaymenDK (713149) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078808)

I'm no thermal engineer, so I have no idea of the amount of energy that a "black" and "truly black" body absorbs, or radiates for that matter. If it's just a five or ten degree increase then that's no big deal for sure.

FYI, I did not take Physics 101, as I'm on the wrong side of the planet for that. I recall no mention of Black Body Radiation in the physics classes I have taken (so thanks for that link, vbraga). See, no need to be offensive.

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078592)

Not likely to get much hotter than any other reasonably black matte object of similar characteristics in other properties you could imagine. Please note that we are talking about dimnishing returns here - if this material absorbs 99.9% of light, remaining 0.1% is really only about 1.5 watts per square meter. It's a big jump from something, say, at 75%, improving energy capture by almost 400 watts there (in optimal sunlight conditions), but still not that it would multiply temperature of otherwise comparable objects...

Re:wouldn't scattered light still be light? (2, Informative)

Eivind (15695) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078584)

True. But this is a "forest" of nanotubes standing on end.

Light that is scattered on impact with the first tube stands a high chance of then ending up hitting a second tube, where it is absorbed. That is the reason this forest-of-nanotubes is blacker than say any other pile of nanotubes.

I was going to ask... (5, Funny)

Dr. Cody (554864) | more than 6 years ago | (#22077984)

...if anybody had found a picture of it. I'd see this article a few days ago and couldn't turn up anything.

Unfortunately, posting on Slashdot provides me with the perspective to see how stupid a question it was.

Not an easy task (1)

PingPongBoy (303994) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078062)

The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of virgins

I can't see the trees for the forests.

Re:I was going to ask... (2, Interesting)

bar-agent (698856) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078226)

I'd like to see a video. All the time, I read fictional accounts of materials that "glow" black, or look so black they're unreal, like a hole in space. I'm thinking this material might look pretty much like that. So, I want to see how it responds to ambient light as it's tilted around, and what happens when you shine a flashlight on it.

Still, if even one photon in a hundred escapes, it can't be too black, now can it?

Re:I was going to ask... (2, Funny)

ndogg (158021) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078348)

Did you really expect that an article on the blackest material ever made would be able to shine some light upon the subject?

microscope video capture nanotube forming network (-1, Flamebait)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078036)

2 photon microscopy video capture of jet black nanotube network. [dwarfurl.com]

Re:microscope video capture nanotube forming netwo (0, Offtopic)

nautsch (1186995) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078238)

parent links to myminicity

How much more black? (5, Funny)

LaskoVortex (1153471) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078052)

"It's like, how much more black could this be? And the answer is none. None more black."

Re:How much more black? (4, Funny)

jay-be-em (664602) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078520)

It's such a fine line between stupid and clever.

mapping this darkness on a scale (5, Funny)

laejoh (648921) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078054)

from 1 to 10 would yield us, what? 11?

Re:mapping this darkness on a scale (2, Funny)

gandhi_2 (1108023) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078158)

The answer is none. None more black.

Mr Desiato would like a word with them... (4, Funny)

jamesh (87723) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078118)

If the media release is accurate, a Mr Hotblack Desiato would like a word with them... his current ship isn't quite black enough.

Re:Mr Desiato would like a word with them... (1)

clickclickdrone (964164) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078408)

Do I get any points for having walked past Hotblack Desiato, the London Estate Agents (Real Estate to your foreign types) which Adams pinched the name from?

Absorbtion (5, Interesting)

Psychotria (953670) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078122)

If the light is absorbed 99.9%, where does the energy go? Heat? If so, could this lead down the road to new power sources? Super-black nanotube network produces heat to produce steam to turn turbines... (??)

Re:Absorbtion (1)

nautsch (1186995) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078244)

Yes heat!

Have you even read the article? SOLAR POWER!!

Black body radiation (4, Interesting)

arrrrg (902404) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078286)

IANAP but I think by being a great absorber, it becomes a great emitter too: Black body [wikipedia.org] . So it may not actually get much hotter than something less black. I guess it depends on where the equilibrium point is, and I don't have any intuition about that.

Re:Black body radiation (5, Informative)

Psychotria (953670) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078352)

I guess the article should really define "light" a bit more tightly. From your link:

Although Planck's formula predicts that a black body will radiate energy at all frequencies, the formula is only applicable when many photons are being measured. For example, a black body at room temperature (300 K) with one square meter of surface area will emit a photon in the visible range once every thousand years or so, meaning that for most practical purposes, the black body does not emit in the visible range.

My, possibly incorrect, interpretation (assumption?) of the article was "light" in the broad sense of all electromagnetic radiation. This, however, does not make your link less interesting; in fact, in makes it more interesting. Thank-you.

Re:Absorbtion (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078362)

Well, a typical black surface (like asphalt) absorbs 90% of light, while specialty surfaces designed for absorbing light get to better than 99%. In other words, this stuff is only 1% more efficient at absorbing light than black felt.

Don't be looking for any thermal heating breakthroughs, because it's only physically possible to get 11% better than asphalt or matte black paint.

dom

Re:Absorbtion (3, Interesting)

blackest_k (761565) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078580)

From the BBC article
"The application will be to things like more efficient solar cells, more efficient solar panels and any application where you need to harvest light," he added.

There was an earlier article on /. with a related technology essentially printing small antennas on a plastic film which essentially create a high frequency ac voltage from heat and light energy , if the nanotubes are conductive perhaps the two technologies be combined to make some extremely efficient solar panels.

   

Re:Absorbtion (1)

visomo (618182) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078692)

From the article:

"The application will be to things like more efficient solar cells, more efficient solar panels and any application where you need to harvest light," he added.

Dethklok were first to do this (2, Funny)

black_lbi (1107229) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078160)

"We're here to make coffee metal.
We're here to make everything metal.
Blacker than the blackest black times infinity."

bloody hell... (1)

theheadlessrabbit (1022587) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078162)

now were going to have to deal with a bunch of damned black-clad nu-goths!

And not only will we all hate their music, but we will all come to the sad realization that yes, they are more black than we ever were in our youth.

deja vu (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078166)

My memory may fool me, but I heard about that months before. An interesting article which compared the index of refraction of this nanotube carpet to other surfaces, e.g. the moon.

cb

This will go perfect with my (1)

Smordnys s'regrepsA (1160895) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078170)

How long till I can get a "#000000" on Super-Black tee? Or, a full body-suit so I can be the best Hide-and-Seeker ever!
...I must make plans for a ninja vs samurai LARP!


ps:doesn't this seem like the perfect article for those racist ACs?

Re:This will go perfect with my (1)

Thanshin (1188877) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078262)

ps:doesn't this seem like the perfect article for those racist ACs?
Armor class? classes? Damn my learning English by reading d&d books.

Should have specified. (1)

Smordnys s'regrepsA (1160895) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078284)

Nope, I was talking about SlashDot - the Anonymous Cowards who scream "the blacks are taking over the country," and then go on to post stupid stories that repeatedly use the N-word.

SCNR (1)

Jesus_666 (702802) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078384)

North American of African Descent, please!

Re:This will go perfect with my (1)

Bazman (4849) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078598)

This black is blacker than that. Your tee would have to have something like: '#0000000000000'

Another article with a pic of the substance (4, Informative)

Spittles (670928) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078250)

Re:Another article with a pic of the substance (1)

Chilluhm (953659) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078646)

Mod parent up! This story's better with a reference picture.

Not Metal Enough (1)

hedgemage (934558) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078266)

To paraphrase Nathan Explosion:
"We're going to make nanotubes /metal/. Blacker than the blackest black... times infinity."

I guessed I missed (1)

Xanius (955737) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078300)

I guess I missed the part in the article that said 99.9%....

darkest known material... (-1, Offtopic)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078312)

like nigger skin?

Black holes (1)

4D6963 (933028) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078318)

Ha! So I guess that is what black "holes" are really made of!

Where to put it (5, Interesting)

xZoomerZx (1089699) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078336)

Im wondering at the practical applications of this and how much it will have to be hidden or at least above the human zone (from the floor to about 7') I imagine extreme blackness would cause an effect similar to "The Blindspot" of sic-fi space travel. In effect the eye/brain would not 'see' the blackness and pull the visible edges together in an optical illusion.

Case in point - I was once in a room that had contained a fire. The walls, floor, ceiling, and windows were all coated in a soft black soot that was perfectly uniform and ate all the light. The effect was very disconcerting and disorienting. None of the normal visual cues of highlights, textures, or reflections existed. Only the open door gave a reference point so that you didn't feel like you were floating in a void.

The article posits several uses, but can you imagine a person clothed in this black in full sunlight? Could we even see them? or a building covered in it? or a car? Sight requires a least some photons to hit the retina. Anyone? I know I sound repetitive, its 0430 and didn't want to lose the train of thought to sleep.

Re:Where to put it (1)

dltaylor (7510) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078370)

The "blindspot" effect may well occur in enclosed spaces. In the open, where there is a plethora of visual references, a human-sized or larger object non-reflective object would be readily apparent because the shape would trigger the "edge-detect" optical neurons. If you were sufficiently close to, and facing, a true-black object, such that it occupied nearly all of your visual space, you might be back to the blindspot.

Re:Where to put it (2, Funny)

entrigant (233266) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078476)

Hmm... a gigantic near absolute black building in the middle of a sunny day... hmmmmm... nope, don't think I'd notice that.

Re:Where to put it (5, Informative)

Jesus_666 (702802) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078480)

Yes, we would. No incoming photons doesn't mean that our brain furiously tries to make our pattern filling work 1000% beyond what it normally does. It would mean a big black spot. Just because a person wearing a suit made out of this would look completely flat doesn't mean he'd be invisible.

Even if your brain couldn't handle pure blackness, the rods still fire randomly, ensuring that some form if input is always present. You can verify this by closing your eyes in a very dark room - you should see a color that is not black. This color is called eigengrau [wikipedia.org] .

I think this will be of limited value for personal stealth measures - being that dark, you'd stand out even aginst regular dark surfaces. However, as another article pointed out, a stealth plane could profit from being able to absorb radar beams. Research into the absorption of non-visible wavelengths is already underway.

More like a blind spot? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078792)

I think what parent is talking about is a blind spot. Which btw, I have one. I can't see it 95% of the time, but sometimes when I look at the shower tiles I can see, I can see a some black spot that moves with my eyes, usually can't see it with just one eye. But otherwise the brain just feels it what it thinks should be there and I don't notice it.

So the question is a building painted really black could one see the building on the horizon or would the brain's blind spot compensation just kick in and cover up the building with more sky? I don't think it would help too much since the building would be visable when one got closer to the building because the blind spot compensation would turn off.

Also, one would not be able to see what the building looks like, It would just be a silhouette. You couldn't tell a ball from a disk just by looking at it, if it where truly black. Here is some food for thought imagine a gun man wearing a black black suit with a black black gun. One wouldn't be able to see his hands much less the gun only the silhouette of his body.

posting Anonymous, to keep the FAA from find out.

But (4, Funny)

niceone (992278) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078350)

How much more is the the Macbook that is this colour going to cost???

The new macbook is all about being seen.... (2, Interesting)

Joce640k (829181) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078516)

Why would you want to hide your new Macbook away?

A great use for this would be the border area around my home cinema screen. The projector leaks a bit of light there...

Why wont this change the world? (1, Insightful)

schweini (607711) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078356)

If Earth's solar constant is 1366 W/m2 [wikipedia.org] , and this 'color' absorbs 99.9% of the incoming light's energy (which wavelengths? all of them?), wouldn't this mean that it would be almost trivial to boil water in containers covered with this, and thus power steam turbines? Shouldn't this then be basically the solution to all out energy problems, or is there something i am missing? Losses by black-body radiation, if i understood that problem correctly, depend on the material's temperature, but i'd guess that at 100C, this would still be an incredible energy-source. Just a couple of square meters on the roof would easily power a house.

Re:Why wont this change the world? (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078578)

Not a revolution, because what we have already probably absorbs 99%, and cheap black stuff will absorb at least 10%. A 1% efficiency increase isn't revolutionary.

Re:Why wont this change the world? (2, Informative)

evilviper (135110) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078600)

If Earth's solar constant is 1366 W/m2,

No.

The "solar constant" is measured "on the outer surface of [the] atmosphere", most certainly NOT at ground level. Down here, you get around 100W/m2, during daylight, in the summer, with no cloud cover, etc.

Did you really think that our previous "blackest" materials were simply so highly reflective as to make such a scheme impossible? No, they absorb something like 95%+ of light. But with that, you simply need a huge area to get a useful amount of energy.

Re:Why wont this change the world? (3, Interesting)

famebait (450028) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078606)

I was thinking along the same lines.

But while his material would undoubtedly be very efficient for absorbing heat, it does not represent any revolution in that area: we can already absorb sunlight for heat with reasonably high efficiency with just basically black paint. This invention is better, by many percentage points, but it is still only an incremental step up from what we can already easily get per square meter.

Also, as always, the economics come into play: it will often be a lot more attractive to use a cheaper and much simpler solution, and spend slightly more surface area to compensate for the lower efficiency.
Extruded black plastic will probably still be hard to beat in the real world for a while.

I think it will be much more useful in light sensitive applications.

Finally (3, Funny)

Phyrexicaid (1176935) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078368)

Ninja suits!

Stack of razorblades (3, Interesting)

Wilson_6500 (896824) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078376)

I always thought it was kinda interesting that a stack of razorblades makes a fair approximation of a blackbody. You can't grow stacks of razorblades on surfaces, natch, but for some applications I imagine you just need a small optical sink and don't want to spend a lot of money. Then again, this could be just trivia more than something that's useful to know.

(Because of the potential for dangerous reflections, please don't shine lasers into a stack of razors trying to test their reflectivity--unless you know what you're doing and, hopefully, have an appropriate pair of laser goggles.)

obligatory (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078382)

Nothing to see here ... please move along

Dupe (0)

IKILLEDTROTSKY (1197753) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078394)

Wasn't there a story about the darkest dark about a year ago? It reflected as much light as air, and if you painted everything in a room with it and placed an object on a table would appear to be floating?

vanishing comments (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078420)

A couple of minutes I posted a comment which isn't here anymore. If it's been done intentionally -- if you don't know what I am talking about, don't assume it's wrong.

cb

What? (1)

Opportunist (166417) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078460)

Over 50 replies and no Dark Matter jokes?

C'mon, people, are you all still asleep?

Meh... (1)

Gazzonyx (982402) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078774)

Over 50 replies and no Dark Matter jokes?

C'mon, people, are you all still asleep?
We used them all up about 2 weeks ago when there were 3 stories about dark matter and 2 about black holes. We simply exhausted our allotment early this month... although, as of yesterday, database, middleware, and Java jokes are in.


Use them while you can, chances are the next round of database jokes will be triggered by Microsoft's purchase of a database company, and we'll burn a lot of good material preferring Access, VB(A,6), and Vista jokes in lieu of straight database jokes. If you don't have any handy, I've got some file system jokes tucked away for a slow news day that I could let you borrow.

Sundive! (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078488)

"It's the weird colour scheme that freaks me. Every time you try to operate one of these weird black controls, which are labeled in black on a black background, a small black light lights up black to let you know you've done it."

Great, now I have to update my livejournal! (4, Funny)

bipbop (1144919) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078528)

My soul is as black as the darkest carbon nanotube forest!

Metalocalypse will love it... (1)

Ours (596171) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078562)

For a new "blackest black" album.
Light gets lost in the cover, now that's heavy.

Absorbed vs scattered (1)

eremos (526869) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078608)

What percentage of the light is scattered vs absorbed, and what wavelengths?

but... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22078640)

mind you they were actually trying to find a paler shade of grey.

Perfect for Priests' Socks (4, Funny)

clickety6 (141178) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078710)

Father Ted - Series Three, Episode One

DOUGAL: Anyway, what else did you order?

TED: Priest socks. Really black ones.

DOUGAL: I read somewhere, I think it was in an article about priest socks that priest socks are blacker than any other type of socks.

TED: That's right Dougal. Sometimes you see lay people wear what look like black socks but if you look closely you'll see they're very, very, very, very, very, very, very dark blue.

DOUGAL: Actually that's true. I thought my uncle Tommy was wearing black socks but when I looked at them closely they were just very, very, very, very, very, very, VERY, very, very, very dark blue.

TED: Never buy black socks in a normal shop. They'll shaft you every time!

What happens with the absorbed photons? (2, Interesting)

master_p (608214) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078772)

Where does the energy go?

Sounds like... (1)

amirulbahr (1216502) | more than 6 years ago | (#22078814)

this really is The New Black.
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