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Name the New Gamma-Ray Space Telescope

kdawson posted more than 6 years ago | from the your-name-in-high-frquency-lights dept.

NASA 131

Ponca City, We Love You writes "NASA announced last week that members of the general public will have a chance to suggest a new name for the cutting edge Gamma-ray Large Area Space Telescope, otherwise known as GLAST, before it launches in mid-2008. NASA wants a name that will capture the excitement of GLAST's mission and call attention to gamma-ray and high-energy astronomy. 'We are looking for something memorable to commemorate this spectacular new astronomy mission,' said Alan Stern, associate administrator for Science at NASA Headquarters in Washington. 'We hope someone will come up with a name that is catchy, easy to say and will help make the satellite and its mission a topic of dinner table and classroom discussion.' The period for submitting names closes on March 31, 2008. Participants must include a statement of 25 words or less about why their suggestion would be a strong name for the mission."

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Glastnost? (3, Funny)

Nefarious Wheel (628136) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368252)

Ushering in a new era for our ...no, can't say it...

Why, GLADOS... (5, Funny)

croddy (659025) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368254)

GLADOS: the Gamma-ray Large Area Deep-sky Object Surveyor.

Just don't equip her with any neurotoxin emitters.

Re:Why, GLADOS... (2, Funny)

mdenham (747985) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368302)

You would have to ensure that it remains operational at temperatures up to 4000 kelvins.

Re:Why, GLADOS... (1)

Smordnys s'regrepsA (1160895) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368606)

Man, I spent too much time trying to come up with a nifty acronym... but really, who didn't think of GLADOS the moment they saw GLAST?

Well, I guess there's no sense crying over every mistake.

Re:Why, GLADOS... (1)

NewbieProgrammerMan (558327) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368882)

Er...I didn't. Does not knowing what the fuck "GLADOS" is now make me a grumpy old man that's out of touch with geek pop culture? In that case, take your GLADOS and get off my lawn!!!

From Portal (1)

Smordnys s'regrepsA (1160895) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368984)

From the Wiki

GLaDOS (Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System, voiced by Ellen McLain), a computer artificial intelligence that monitors and directs the player.


She's from the video game Portal, the reason people say "The cake is a lie!" She is an unreliable narrator throughout the game, who promises cake when you pass all the tests (but she actually means death)

GLaDOS is the one singing in Still Alive [youtube.com] - the song playing during the ending credits. It's written by Jonathan Coulton [thesixtyone.com] - known for his song Code Monkey, among other things (like the acoustic version of Baby Got Back)

Some ideas (5, Funny)

AlphaDrake (1104357) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368256)

Far
Astronomical Usefull
Reaching
Telescope

Very
Useful
Lens
Viewing
Apparatus

Super
Long
Apparatus
So
Humans
Dont just
Ogle
Themselves

Re:Some ideas (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22369592)

BIGTITS : Big Inanimate Gamma-ray Thing In The Sky

Something cutting edge (2, Funny)

ryants (310088) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368284)

How about... Compuglobalhypermegatelescope?

Gamma rays... catchy? (2, Interesting)

Firas Zirie (1179357) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368306)

NASA wants a name that will capture the excitement of GLAST's mission and call attention to gamma-ray and high-energy astronomy

I don't think that this topic will ever be exciting. NASA is doing PR work to get more public support and as a result, more funding. If they do want support, show the public some amazing images of what this thing can capture, then the public will be interested. It's sad that NASA has to do this instead of focusing on the science.

Ludicrous Speed! (1)

Smordnys s'regrepsA (1160895) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368666)

If they do want support, show the public some amazing images of what this thing can capture, then the public will be interested.

Let me just point out one thing, real quick.

before it launches in mid-2008

If they do manage to show us those images, I'd love to throw money at them - for their new time-travel technology, not some lame conventional science experiment!

Re:Gamma rays... catchy? (2, Insightful)

mefein (664330) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368818)

If pretty pictures are what drive your boat, then I agree, high energy astronomy will not be exciting to you.

If you care about science breakthroughs, then high energy experiments are the place to look. This is a branch of astronomy that is decades old, rather then centuries old for optical astronomy. The relative improvement of each high energy instrument over its predecessors is huge and the science leap is correspondingly large.

Seeing the Universe for the first time in a new energy range is at least as exciting as seeing something we already know more sharply, but the images won't be as cool. I care about dark matter, physics in the presence of strong magnetic fields, gamma-ray bursts and the origin of the highest energy particles in the Universe. These won't make amazing images, but to me they are very exciting.

Excitement in science might be in the eye of the beholder.

Re:Gamma rays... catchy? (1)

Locklin (1074657) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369958)

Ever wondered why the "beautiful" horse nebula is not colour consistant from image to image? Many of those striking images of space are "transformed" into a colour space for aesthetic and pedagogical purposes. There's nothing stopping them from transforming the information collected in any medium into something interesting to look at.

Call it... (1)

Vectronic (1221470) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368310)

GLAST... then call the next one GLAST II, and the one after that GLAST III... etc...

What it can do is far more important than what its called, and GLAST is easy enough to say.

Re:Call it... (1)

Nemilar (173603) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368352)

NASA has a history [nasa.gov] of letting [nasa.gov] people [nasa.gov] name [lego.com] things. It's a fun and easy way to get people interested in space travel, science, exploration, and whatever else it is that NASA is doing. The more people excited about NASA, the better.

Re:Call it... (1)

DHalcyon (804389) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368412)

GLAST... then call the next one GLAST II, and the one after that GLAST III... etc...
If there's more, wouldn't "GFIRST" be more appropriate?

Re:Call it... (1)

argiedot (1035754) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368746)

Not enough credit. It should be GNU/Last.

The Hulk (4, Funny)

CrazyJim1 (809850) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368336)

See if Marvel lets you have the rights.

Is it green or grey? (1)

OMNIpotusCOM (1230884) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369004)

Signed. And then, when it fails, they'll likely let you use Hulk Smash too.

Re:The Hulk (1)

Bazer (760541) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369694)

Maybe "Space Hulk". Maintenance will be bitch though, with all those gene stealers running around in tight corridors.

Of course (5, Funny)

elronxenu (117773) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368344)

Gamma-ray
Observatory
Astronomical
Telescope
Special
Edition

Re:Of course (1, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368536)

High-energy
Orbi-
ting
Gamma
Ray
Imaging
Tele-
scope

Re:Of course (2, Funny)

nleaf (953206) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368590)

Which would make it uniquely suited to search for black holes.

Re:Of course (1)

ScrewMaster (602015) | more than 6 years ago | (#22370628)

Nah ... there are already too many assholes putting junk in orbit nowadays.

I'd go for Gamma Sensing Permanent Orbital Telescope. Or maybe Comprehensive Orbital Weapons Platform And Telescopic Targeting Interface.

Please, I'm eating here (0, Offtopic)

kamapuaa (555446) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368420)

7!

Death Star (5, Funny)

kitsunewarlock (971818) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368422)

I say we call it the "Death Star". Not so much for its abilities as we know it, but simply to scare off alien species who have used films to study our culture and will assume we have perfected the art of super-lasers.

We should be ok. Everyone knows aliens read slashdot at the default settings, and if my other posts are any indication, I shouldn't get over a 2 (funny), tops.

Re:Death Star (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368748)

If someone mods you Insightful for knowing you're not going to get modded... does that break the internets?

Re:Death Star (1)

Tony Hoyle (11698) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368772)

That would only work if we let it be widely known we'd strapped a shark to it as well.

Re:Death Star (1)

ralewi1 (919193) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369184)

To truly strike fear into the hearts of all sentient beings, it should be named "President Mike Huckabee".

Re:Death Star (1)

maxwell demon (590494) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369354)

What about simply calling it "W"?

eee (2, Funny)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368446)

Everybody Loves Gamma-Rays

I got it... (1)

Tumbleweed (3706) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368462)

"Lookie Lou"

Asking the public to name things? (2, Interesting)

Happosai (73708) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368470)

Mister Splashy Pants [wikipedia.org] ... [Happosai]

They need to forget about acronyms and name it.... (-1, Redundant)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368480)

HULK

Blind Baby (From Cheech and Chong) (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368494)

I'm in there as "Blind Baby"

they have some interesting captcha's !!

Some suggestions (4, Funny)

ElMiguel (117685) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368496)

NASA is in need of capturing the imagination of the American public and showing congressmen that they're a worthy investment. With that in mind, here are my suggestions:
  • The We Need More Funding Telescope.
  • The Sexier Than Natalie Portman Telescope.
  • The Protection For America's Children Telescope.
  • The We're Still Better Than China Telescope.
By the way, I am available as a telescope naming consultant for the low low price of $200/hour. Hire me now and beat the other telescope making countries!

Re:Some suggestions (1)

id3as (1067224) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369908)

  • UNISEX = UNIVerSe EXplorer

I'm gonna win (1)

d474 (695126) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368498)

High Energy Wide Area Gamma Ray Detecting Overlord

Re:I'm gonna win (1)

maxwell demon (590494) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369236)

Maybe to get more funding they'd better name it IBCOGRAT: Imagine a Beowulf Cluster Of Gamma RAy Telescopes!

It clearly fulfills their requirements:

"We're looking for name suggestions that will capture the excitement of GLAST's mission ..."
What could be more exciting than a Beowulf cluster?

"... and call attention to gamma-ray and high-energy astronomy."
The highly recognizable phrase will surely capture attention.

"We are looking for something memorable to commemorate this spectacular new astronomy mission,"
Slashdot proves that it's easy to remember.

"We hope someone will come up with a name that is catchy,"
Catchy enough to be a Slashdot meme

"easy to say"
Obviously.

"easy to say and will help make the satellite and its mission a topic of dinner table and classroom discussion."
It certainly will make it at least a topic of Slashdot discussion.

This is easy (1)

StarfishOne (756076) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368510)

I'd call it "Mammagamma", after the instrumental song by the Alan Parson Project... from the album "Eye in the Sky" ;-D

I got it! (1)

FoolsGold (1139759) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368512)

Smelloscope.

Re:I got it! (1)

antifoidulus (807088) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368638)

NASA already invented that last year, but just forgot about it.

how about (2, Interesting)

ionix5891 (1228718) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368524)

Stephen Hawking Telescope? he is the most recognizable figure in astrophysics for a long time

Re:how about (1)

maxwell demon (590494) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369248)

Stephen Hawking Telescope? he is the most recognizable figure in astrophysics for a long time
From TFA:
"Any suggestions for naming the telescope after a scientist may only include names of deceased scientists whose names are not already used for other NASA missions."

Re:how about (1)

thewiz (24994) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369364)

Just don't call it the Stephen Hawking Interstellar Telescope.

Simple really (2, Funny)

eclectro (227083) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368532)

'We hope someone will come up with a name that is catchy, easy to say and will help make the satellite and its mission a topic of dinner table and classroom discussion.'
Just remove some letters! Gamma Ray becomes GA-Ray, short for Gamma Advanced Ray. Everybody not only will be talking about it, but they would continually be looking up.

How about... (5, Funny)

Grimbleton (1034446) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368540)

Frank?

Re:How about... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368838)

No, I'll be Frank!

Re:How about... (1)

marzipanic (1147531) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368854)

Well you can always talk to Frank...

What about "Telescope" it is short and to the point, failing that "Maxillion" is kind of endearing.

Re:How about... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22369040)

Let's call it Steve! Steve's a pretty name.

Re:How about... (1)

Otto-Marrakech (989922) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369082)

Why are there telescopes like Frank in this world?

Re:How about... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22370432)

I was thinking "Sheila".

Nothing Fancy... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368562)

How about just Dave, or Fiona? :)

Important stuff (2, Interesting)

Ralof (760869) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368568)

Curious Yellow. Or maybe 'Universal Big Brother'

my modest proposal (1)

gadget junkie (618542) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368576)

....how about "Tinfoil one" ?

Almost had a cool name (1)

dotancohen (1015143) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368582)

Gamma-ray Large Area Space Telescope, otherwise known as GLAST
If it were the Beta-ray Large Area Space Telescope it would already have a cool name.

Obvious really (4, Insightful)

Gandalf_Greyhame (44144) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368600)

"Cowboy Neal"

Re:Obvious really (1)

funwithBSD (245349) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369552)

I see your "Cowboy Neal" and raise you a

"RonPaul2008.com"

Look here NASA web tards (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368684)

When I visit http://www.nasa.gov/home/hqnews/2008/feb/HQ_08036_GLAST.html [nasa.gov] I see:

There's a problem with your browser or settings.
 
Your browser or your browser's settings are not supported. To get the best experience possible, please download a compatible browser. If you know your browser is up to date, you should check to ensure that javascript is enabled.
Err no, try this.

There's a problem with our website.
Nice doctype too...

<!DOCTYPE "xmlns:xsl='http://www.w3.org/1999/XSL/Transform'">

Restrictions... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368696)

The restrictions are quite severe. Simple and easy to say, no acronyms, and yet supposed bring attention to gamma-rays and high-energy astronomy.

As for the guy proposing Stephen Hawking as the name, it can't be named after someone still living, so off you go and club him to death first, then submit.

Re:Restrictions... (1)

maxwell demon (590494) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369262)

no acronyms

Wrong. They say acronyms are not required. They don't say they are not allowed.

Re:Restrictions... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22370660)

You fail.

"Make it simple and easy to say. Nothing says complex and inaccessible like a mouthful of acronyms."

At the very least that's a strong recommendation against.

How about (1)

MrCopilot (871878) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368700)

The BANNER

Big Ass Named Nasa Extra Receiver

I have just two words.... (1)

vranash (594439) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368714)

Bruce Banner.

They should quit while they're ahead (1)

James VAR (1207662) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368730)

GLAST is already a catchier name than Hubble.

Re:They should quit while they're ahead (1)

ScrewMaster (602015) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369152)

GLAST is already a catchier name than Hubble.

Yes, and Hubble did have the unfortunate quality of rhyming with "trouble".

GLAST does have rather a Russian flavor to it, though.

Public voting site (1)

rbanffy (584143) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368754)

If they ever open the name to public vote, it may end up being the Chuck Norris Telescope ;-)

A name is nice, but... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368800)

will it do linux?

Re:A name is nice, but... (1)

kdemetter (965669) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369418)

i don't know , but we could use unix style naming :

like that BLAST :

BLAST Large Area Space Telescope

But then we miss a part about Gamma rays

Colbert Eye (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22368804)

Stephen Colbert made NASA.

The ... (1)

tajmahall (997415) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368816)

Please-God-Dont-Let-A-Gamma-Ray-Burst-Destroy-Us-All-Please-Please-Please-Im-Sorry Array.

Hmmmmm..... (1)

IHC Navistar (967161) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368846)

The should pick something from from Calvin & Hobbes.

The Gamma Ray Catcher. (1)

skybuck (582727) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368872)

How about that one ^^^^ ! ;) The Gamma Ray Catcher !

Re:The Gamma Ray Catcher. (1)

skybuck (582727) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368892)

I submitted it to them, lol. That went kinda easy. Let's see what happens :)

Google "cool names" (1)

COMICAGOGO (1055066) | more than 6 years ago | (#22368928)

Ok, a google search for "cool names" gave me a link to the top 100 cool dog names http://www.dog-names-and-more.com/Cool-Dog-Names.html [dog-names-and-more.com]
Some of the better ones that I saw include:
Adonis
abracadabra
cruton
jalapeno
jitterbug
zigzag
Maybe Nasa should just pick one at random. Or if they really want some media coverage they could call it Britney Spears.

Re:Google "cool names" (1)

ROMRIX (912502) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369116)

Or if they really want some media coverage they could call it Britney Spears.

No, I don't think they want it to come crashing down after staying up for five days...

a simple obvious name ... (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22369008)

phallus!

Carl Sagan (4, Interesting)

Ganty (1223066) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369028)

As Dr Hawking is still alive I suggested the Carl Sagan telescope. Now all we need are 'billions and billions' more suggestions.

Ganty

Honestly (4, Insightful)

Z00L00K (682162) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369122)

Don't forget that it was Paul Villard [wikipedia.org] that discovered the gamma rays.

In my opinion he should be honored by giving the name to the telescope. And considering that he actually isn't a well-known person outside the realms of the scientists working with gamma rays it's even better.

Everybody knows about Einstein, Bohr and Curie, but there are many other.

Of course - the site specifies that it isn't necessary that it's a scientist - it can be just about anybody. Just go ahead and suggest some names. I would not recommend names like "Iosif Vissarionovitj Dzjugasjvili", "Ilich Ramírez Sánchez" or "Saloth Sar", but your opinion may be different.

Another suggestion ... (1)

maxwell demon (590494) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369336)

Gamma RAY Great Orbital Observatory. Or short: GRAY GOO.

Xenu (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22369342)

If they call it Xenu, will they get sued by the Church of Scientology?

Peeping Tom...? (1)

eeun (1236652) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369362)

Maybe it could introduce a shift towards voyeurism of the skies.

Name (1)

kylben (1008989) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369398)

Just make sure it has built-in wifi and and a non-replaceable battery and call it the iScope.

Bubble (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22369402)

Duh, shouldn't it be clear that Hubble's cousin is to be named Bubble [wikipedia.org] ?
Although getting something related to Local Fluff through the PHBs may take some effort... gl w/ that guys.

Sugar-Tits, the Mystic Pony!! (1)

Braintrust (449843) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369464)



Too soon?

Name it after a planet (1)

gplus (985592) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369540)

Name it after a planet. How about Uranus Surveyor. That should be easy to remember.

Mr. Spacy Pants! (1)

inkyblue2 (1117473) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369560)

Mr. Spacy Pants!

Fool me once... (1)

jmichaelg (148257) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369654)

The last time they pulled this PR stunt, they ended up ending naming the scope after a NASA bureaucrat, James Webb. Granted, he played a major role in NASA but unlike all the previous scopes, it was the first science instrument named after a political operative.

They really didn't care what the public suggested - they just wanted cover for what they were going to do. I guess, in a way, they were just being honest in admitting that NASA has devolved to primarily being about justifying its own existence.

George Burns' loving wife (1)

alfredo (18243) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369728)

was named Gracie. Why not?

My name (2, Funny)

Lally Singh (3427) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369742)

GIANT SPACE PENETRATOR.

I don't have an acronym for it. I think it'll get the attention necessary.

Suggestion From the Democrats (1)

CodePyro (627236) | more than 6 years ago | (#22369812)

Here is a suggestion from the democratic party.

OBAMA MAMA GAMMA!!!

James Kirk space telescope (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22369872)

to pair it with James Webb telescope

It's a Hulking telescope, so... (2, Insightful)

E-Lad (1262) | more than 6 years ago | (#22370000)

The "Robert Bruce Banner Gamma Telescope" would make sense.

My idea (1)

ILuvRamen (1026668) | more than 6 years ago | (#22370466)

I vote for either "The Eye of Neil" or "Slashdotoscope"

Metroid (1)

Shabadage (1037824) | more than 6 years ago | (#22370604)

Gamma rays? Sounds like Metroid territory to me!

My suggestion (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22370714)

G-unit

Culture please (0)

Anonymous Coward | more than 6 years ago | (#22370964)

A perfect opportunity to borrow a Culture ship name.. here are some appropriate ones:

- "What Are The Civilian Applications?"
- "Frank Exchange Of Views"
- "All The Same, I Saw It First"
- "Big Sexy Beast"
- "Funny, It Worked Last Time..."

and my personal favorite: "Very Little Gravitas Indeed"
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