Beta
×

Welcome to the Slashdot Beta site -- learn more here. Use the link in the footer or click here to return to the Classic version of Slashdot.

Thank you!

Before you choose to head back to the Classic look of the site, we'd appreciate it if you share your thoughts on the Beta; your feedback is what drives our ongoing development.

Beta is different and we value you taking the time to try it out. Please take a look at the changes we've made in Beta and  learn more about it. Thanks for reading, and for making the site better!

Comments

top

The problem with SQL

Abm0raz Re:Greatest() (7 comments)

or use a dynamic temp table sub-select and the HAVING and GROUP BY aggregators.

But honestly, the GREATEST() function will work a lot easier. It's a very CPU intensive function. Writing it out using the dynamic temp table/HAVING/GROUP BY will execute quicker, but will be a lot harder to maintain.

more than 4 years ago
top

Dollhouse

Abm0raz Re:They have a reputation to uphold (6 comments)

I've never fell in love with any Joss stuff. I watched the first 4 episodes of Dollhouse and was unimpressed.

You're right on the cancellations though:
      Arrested Development
      Family Guy
      That 70's Show
      New Amsterdam
      King of the Hill
      Sarah Conner Chronicles

Still not as bad as ABC canceling Pushing Daisies.
     

more than 3 years ago
top

Worst thing?

Abm0raz Re:Yes (4 comments)

Wanting to buy one for someone else's child that won't shut the f*** up and quit screaming when you're out trying to have dinner or watch a movie.

more than 5 years ago
top

10 quotes about truth

Abm0raz Re:Stephen Hawking (15 comments)

I always tell people:
      There is no shame in being ignorant. The shame comes in choosing to remain ignorant.

more than 5 years ago
top

10 quotes about truth

Abm0raz Re:A little more specific: (15 comments)

I believe the following quotes apply here:

There is nothing to fear except the persistent refusal to find out the truth, the persistent refusal to analyze the causes of happenings.

There is nothing to fear except the persistent refusal to find out the truth, the persistent refusal to analyze the causes of happenings.

Truth springs from argument amongst friends.

The great enemy of the truth is very often not the lie -- deliberate, contrived and dishonest -- but the myth -- persistent, persuasive and unrealistic

He that never changes his opinions, never corrects his mistakes, will never be wiser on the morrow than he is today.

well, pretty much all of them.

more than 5 years ago
top

Getting Hired As an Entry-Level Programmer?

Abm0raz Re:You should have asked this a year before. (540 comments)

Moving up in your own company is a shot, but never forget what you can do in your spare time counts. Getting a master's degree is one "spare time" option, but others are Project Coding (such as Elance.com), getting on a fairly large and active Open Source project, or creating your own applications under your own name and putting them out for prospective employers to see.

If you are really serious about getting into a CS development position, I recommend the Open Source route because it will teach you how to code in a group setting and deal with code reviews, QA, and the whole enterprise process.

more than 5 years ago

Submissions

Abm0raz hasn't submitted any stories.

Journals

top

Saw Snakes on a Plane (no spoilers)

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  about 8 years ago

I haven't been to a movie theater since I was dragged against my will to see Gladiator. Before that I was drug against my will to see Star Wars:EP1 and Happily Ever After. I don't give money to cartels, err, the MPAA if I can help it.

But tonight, I went to see S.o.a.P.

IT WAS MOTHERFARKING AWESOME!!!

No spoilers, but I will say, it was twice as good as I expected, and I figured it'd be good. The only complaints I have are:
      1. It starts REALLY SLOWLY.
      2. They never show the actual killing the witness saw, but show every other gruesome death.
      3. The only death I coulda done without is the guy who gets trampled to death.

Those are just little things, over all the movies was great. I give it 4 out of 5 snakes up!

-Ab

ps. don't bother staying for the video for the theme sone afterwards. It's awful. The highlite is a few, slight "side of boob" shots of the emaciated female in the band who looks like an anorexic Courtney Love in the middle of a heroin bender.

top

Java update

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

Ok, thanks to those that responded. I'm using Eclipse right now and following the "Thinking In Java" book (just finished chapter 2.

Some observations so far:

  • Is there any difference in Syntax from C++? I mean besides the obvious as Java lacks pointer notation (so no *p references), but from what I've seen so far, the syntax is exactly the same as C++, except that it's case sensative.
  • One thing frustrates me to no end in Eclipse: Whenever I type out an object, class, or method and get to the "." to call something else inside it, it pops up all possible matches. This I like, but is it possible to change it so that when the match I want is the first in the list that I can hit "tab" instead of "enter" to select it. Just a pet peeve as all of the IDEs I used for my other languages used the tab button and it's getting a bit frustrating :)

    ***UPDATE***
    Figured it out. Window-> Preferences-> General-> Editors-> Keys-> Edit-> Word Completion-> Add "Tab"

  • Here is my first bit of code from scratch:

    /* Thinking in Java 3rd ed. r4.0
    * Chapter 2 Exercise 5
    *
    * Write a program that includes and calls the storage( )
    * method defined as a code fragment in this chapter.
    *
    * Fragment:
    * 1. int storage(String s) {
    * return s.length() * 2;
    * }
    *
    * StorageTest.java by Abmoraz
    */

    class StorageSize {
    /* A string requires 2 bytes for every character.
    * StorageSize.storage() returns this value.
    */
        int storage (String s) {
                return s.length() * 2;
        }
    }

    public class StorageTest {
        public static void main(String[] args) {
            StorageSize S = new StorageSize();
            String str = new String("ThinkingInJava");
            System.out.println("The string: ");
            System.out.println(" " + str);
            System.out.print("requires ");
            System.out.print(S.storage(str));
            System.out.println(" bytes of storage.");
            return;
        }
    }

-Ab

top

[ask a subset of /.] Beginners java programming

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

Ok, I'm taking the plunge. I'm leaving comfortable box that is C++ and VB and am going to try and learn JAVA.

My questions are:

      1. Where do I start? Keep in mind that I have *0* budget. I can't even buy a book, more or less an expensive IDE. Are there free things available (like F/OSS)? I prefer Windows environment, but also have a Debian box at home that's kinda beat up. Even if the stuff isn't free, recommend it anyways. I might be able to come up with the ability to get it.

      2. I'm a fairly advanced programmer already. I understand things like sorts, searches, OOP, loops, decision statements, stacks, queues, linked lists, variable types, pointers, etc. I'm not looking for a void main() {printf("hello world!/n");} type stuff. Some of those that played GalaxisOnline with us (planet FSoF RULED!) have seen some of my programming ability and level with the psuedo-browser I integrated into Excel.

      3. My main goal is to take a few of the games I wrote in VB and recreate them in JAVA. This is mainly just to show my different programming skills. I.e.: This is how I handle user input. This is how I call a database. This is how I move sprites. etc...

My big problem is that I will have been un(der)employed for a year on friday. I've gone on several interviews but most of my skills are outdated (VB6, and such) and I need to update.

Thanks for any help.

-Ab

top

South Park & Images of the Islamic Prophet

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

I fail to see the big deal about showing an image of Mohammed on South Park. They've pictured him before standing next to Jesus. He can even shoot fire out of his hands. How cool is that! All Jesus could do was build a mold for a giant John Wilkes Booth.

Noone complained then. Hypocracy is great, no?

-Ab

ps. if you want to see the new image of Mohammed, he's visible in the opening credits/sequence of "The Return of Chef" and "Smug Alert!". They've since editted him out. Anyone that's got them TiVo'd/MythTV'd can catch it.

top

I know a murderer.... (UPDATED)

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

A shock to the system. Someone I know was arrested today for brutally bludgeoning a man to death. (link 1 and link 2) I had played poker with him quite regularly. He was a short tempered man whom many of us started trying to avoid. He was a coke-head* and frequently played when severely drunk. I have seen him lose over $140 in a single sitting when we were playing $20 max buy-in. I disliked playing with the man so much that I've skipped a few games just cause I knew he'd be there. The last time we played, I was up $70 for the night (most won from him) and he started gunning for me. It was so bad that if he was in the hand, I folded automatically cause I didn't want to deal with him, even if he limped into my big blind.

He was a manager at one of the nicer bar/restaurants, but was recently fired (2 weeks ago) for doing coke** on the job. The bar/restaurant crowd here is rather close knit. For the most part, we all know each other and get along. It's almost like a fraternity of sorts. When you walk into another person's place, you get better treatment (extra drinks, free stuff, no cover, discounts, etc...) because you're part of "the bar crowd" (phrase coined by a friend of mine that owns a bar in town). To see something like this happen is really ... trying to find the word ... disconcerting. It's not the word I'm looking for, but it's close enough. Especially considering that another of our own died 2 weeks ago after being stabbed in the heart while trying to break up a fight.

There are others that do coke (I do not), but none seemed anywhere near the problems that Andy had. If you read the second article, "Dan" (someone I play poker with much more often and talk to more regularly) was quoted as saying that Andy never raged or blacked out. This HAS to be a pure P.R. move on his part, as he's been there when we had to kick Andy out before.

As for 'Sweet', I think I might have met him before, but I can't be sure. I don't want to speculate because if it is who I think it might be, I couldn't even ID him if I wanted to. After reading the description, I think the 3 of us (me, Dan, and Andy) played poker at his place this summer. I thought his name was Tony, or Anthony, or something to that nature. I don't believe he was ever called 'Sweet' once, but the description fits and he was the one that introduced us to Andy.

As for the dead guy... never met him or heard of him. Don't even think he was part of the poker or bar/restaurant crowd.

All in all, this REEKS of a cocaine deal gone bad. I'm glad I seperated any ties I had with him about 2 months ago. I don't want to have anything to do with this.

-Ab

* I have never seen him actually snort. Just what I've been told by friends.
** Again, just hearsay through the bar/resaurant grapevine.

*****************UPDATE***************
After reading the article in today's paper, I realized I had played poker with the guy who was killed.

top

Bye-Bye Mario *wipes a tear away*

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

Bye-Bye French-Canadian Guy

Long, long time ago
I can still remember
For a dollar you could sit real high
I knew if we got our chance
We could make Lord Stanley dance
If maybe we could draft a big French guy
For 16 years we sat and shivered
In one draft pick it was delivered
Good news on the doorstep, the Stanley Cup just one step
I can't remember if I cried when I read about that big French guy
Something touched me deep inside
The day Lemieux retired

Chorus:
Bye Bye French-Canadian guy
Drive your beamer to the Igloo past the parking lot guy
And vendor boys will sell you their I.C. Light
But this will be the day the Pens die
This will be the day the Pens die

Do you hate a scoreless tie?
And do you have faith in Stan and Guy
When they're on the radio?
And do you believe in the breakout pass
Do his hattricks knock you on your ass
And can you teach me how to skate real fast
Well we know his back is pretty sore
And he's not a young guy anymore
When he kicks off the skates
He leaves us second rate
We were knockin on the basement floor
When we drafted him in '84
How in the world can we endure
The day Lemieux retired

Chorus
Bye Bye French-Canadian guy
Drive your beamer to the Igloo past the parking lot guy
And vendor boys will sell you their I.C. Light
But this will be the day the Pens die
This will be the day the Pens die

I met Grant Fuhr of the St. Louis Blues
And I asked him for some happy news
He said Mario has gone away
And I know if I had my chance
And I sounded like I came from France
Maybe they just might let me play
But coach saw me and he said: No, Not, Never
My boss said: Your pay I'll sever
I sit and watch the playoffs
KNOWING FLYERS ARE ALL JAG-OFFS!
And the 3 men I admire most:
Stan and Guy and Myron Cope
Skipped right by with my remote
The day Lemieux retired

Chorus
Bye Bye French-Canadian guy
Drive your beamer to the Igloo past the parking lot guy
And vendor boys will sell you their I.C. Light
But this will be the day the Pens die
This will be the day the Pens die

We'll miss ya, Mario.

-Ab

top

How do you lose to Bald Bull???

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

In the vein of Super Mario and the Acapella medly ...

I give you Mike Tyson's Punch-Out!

-Ab

****UPDATE****
Link is fixed. That's what I get for trying to hot-link directly to the media file.

top

mythtv users *PSA -- IMPORTANT*

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

Zap2it's servers are down!!

TURN OFF YOUR AUTOMATIC mythfilldatabase SETTINGS!

If mythfilldatabase runs, you will lose some, if not all your listings. (trust me, I found out the hard way).

You can check to see if their database is up by going here. If the actual page shows up, you should be fine and can run mythfilldatabase again. If you get a ton of Oracle errors, it's still down.

If you find that you've lost some settings there are 2 options (once Zap2it is back up):

      1. run mythfilldatabase --manual from SSH or a terminal. It's a bit tedious, so beware.

      2. run mythtv-setup. Select "no" to clearing card info, but "yes" to clearing channel info. Re-setup your channels and connect it to your card, then download all the listings again by running mythfilldatabase once. It should grab the next 2 weeks all over again.

-Ab

-Ab

top

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

If I had a gun, I'd shoot myself. Oh wait, I do. I have 9. They're safely locked up at the house I'm supposed to be at in 6hrs. If my f'in mechanics could tell their ass from a whole in the wall, I'd be there already, but instead, they've had my car for 10 days, ordered wrong parts twice, and after telling me it'd be done last friday, then tuesday, then friday, then noon today, are telling me it'll be noon on tuesday at the earliest. I'd go take it back from them except that it's the brake lines that are missing and I couldn't get very far.

I haven't even been able to shop yet cause I haven't got a damn ride to the stores. At least I'll get to buy my gifts at the after-christmas sales (assuming I actually get my car back on tuesday).

Merry f'in X-mas. Time to go put the Christmas Ham (and Cheese Hot Pocket) in the (toaster) oven.

-Ab

top

My mom, the comedian...

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

So, I got a christmas card from my mom today. Inside was a 2 page letter that looks like it was sent out with all their cards. Below is a transcript of said letter, complete with all punctuation and grammar errors (with the names changed to protect the guilty). Some background:

ABM0RAZ.DAD is 5'8", 185 pounds and is the most stoic man I know. Nothing phases him. I've never seen him cry, show pain, raise his voice. I've barely seen him celebrate a Steeler touchdown. Also, he's 54, diabetic, and nearly legally blind.

ABM0RAZ.MOM is 5'9", 105 pounds and is the most emotional person I ever met. She freaks out about EVERYTHING. Finding a dollar in her pants on laundry day is a reason to call the local paper. She is 50, arthritic, and a heavy smoker.

----------

Merry Christmas everyone. We wanted to drop you a little note to get everyone up to date with the ABM0RAZ.LASTNAME.

ABM0RAZ graduated this year with a degree in Industrial Engineering. ABM0RAZ.BROTHER got a promotion and moved to Kentucky. We are extremely proud of both of them.

Both kids moved this year, which starts my stories.

First ABM0RAZ. He has a theory that you don't need to wash dishes, you just buy more. When there are so many dirty dishes in your kitchen that you can't walk in, you move. That's where mom and dad come in. He doesn't move far, sometimes a block or so, sometimes just to another apartment in the same building. He also does not pack before moving day. Moving day involves filling milk crates with stuff and he and his dad hauling things down the road. In the meantime I wash dishes. The first time I washed them for about two hours, the last time it was about five. There is a dishwasher in his townhouse, so I don't think he will ever move again.

ABM0RAZ.BROTHER on the other hand moves far (Florida, Pittsburgh, Kentucky). He has everything packed and all of his furnature disassembled when we arrive. The problem with his moves is the distance he goes. As you probably know, I don't like to travel, and I especially do not like to drive. Well the theory was ABM0RAZ.BROTHER would drive his car, ABM0RAZ.DAD would drive the U-Haul and I would drive our car. Big mistake. Everything started out well, we got him picked up and we took off. ABM0RAZ.DAD was leading and I followed him. All went well until we got to Columbus and decided to stop for the night. We checked into the hotel and decided to get gas before we went to bed. The gas station was across the street, but you could not get there from where we were.

So ABM0RAZ.DAD leading in the truck makes a right turn on red, Before I could get through the light, it changed and a row of traffic got inbetween us. We had to go down the road, turn onto a side street and circle back onto the highway. Did not happen. After I lost ABM0RAZ.DAD, I tried to find the side road. What I thought was a turn into a shopping center turned out to be the entrance ramp onto I-70. I knew that if I got onto the highway I would never find my way back and I had no way to let ABMORAZ.DAD know where I was. So I decided to back off the highway (don't ever travel with me). Once I got to the end of the on-ramp, I had no way to get back onto the road without backing into the lane of oncoming traffic. So guess what I did? I finally connected with ABM0RAZ.DAD at the gas station and we made it back to the motel in one piece. The next morning when we were leaving we found out all we would have had to do was go straight through the light. The little side road would have taken us tight to the gas station, which, by the way, was in view the whole time.

At this point, any normal person would not have let me drive any further, but we are talking about us. THe trip took us through Cincinnati. Not only do I not like to drive, but city driving terrifies me. The highway took us through downtown Cinci. I was white knuckled and chewing my gum so hard that saliva was drooling down my face. WHen we got through the city and stopped, ABM0RAZ.DAD asked if I saw the stadiums. I said, "What stadiums?" He said they were on both sides of this huge bridge we went over. I hit him.

We got ABM0RAZ.BROTHER moved in without anymore problems and made it home. ABM0RAZ.DAD drove.

We remodled our bathroom this year. Of course I wanted a huge, cast-iron claw foot tub. It weighs 350 pounds. Now you all have seen my house, narrow stairway and a sharp U-turn at the top leading down a narrow rail-lined hallway to get to the bathroom. There is no way to describe, without actually showing a video what it was like to have four grown men, each over 220 pounds, and a 350 pound tub in a narrow stairway. The good news is that they got it in up and in while only knocking out one stair spindle, one small knick in the tub and one busted molding.

After all this, you would think we would be content to sit at home. Not us. We decided to go to Ocean City for a week. As we were carrying our luggage into the room, ABM0RAZ.DAD said, "Do you smell something burning?" I could let your imaginations run wild, but you would never come up with what really happened. ABM0RAZ.DAD set a case of beer on the stove. The previous tenants had left the burner on. Yes, the beer caught on fire.

OK, we came home, everything is peaceful. You think? I turned the water on to take a bath in my new tub. I could hear water running but nothing was coming out of the faucet. I ran downstairs, and lo and behold the office was filled with water. A pipe had broken. ABM0RAZ.DAD turned off the water and I had just started to clean up when he yelled, "LOOK OUT". The ceiling fell.

Life is never boring.

We do have good news, his dad turned 88 this year and mine celebrated his 86th birthday. Mom is doing well and we consider ourselves blessed to still be sharing our lives with them.

We would love to have you visit us, but we recommend you call first and check on the following things before you arrive.

  • Has ABM0RAZ.DAD bought beer lately, and if so, is the house still standing?
  • If you sit in the office, will you be hit by a waterfall?

And whatever you do, do not ask me for directions, you could end up in Alaska.

Happy Holidays, hope to see you all soon.

ABM0RAZ.MOM

top

New ultra-funny #1 must see show

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

Now that Mind of Mencia is in re-run status till February, I had to find another equally funny, yet thought-provokingly offensive show to watch.

Friends, neighbors, secret lovers ... set your DVRs to Cartoon Network's (Adult Swim) at 11pm Sunday nights for: The Boondocks.

I nearly pissed my pants after just seeing the first episode.

Some choice quotes from the movie:

Riley: You think we in trouble?
Huey: You just shot his grandson out a window. What'chu think?

Grandad: See? That's what Im talkin' about right there. We don't use the "N-word" in this house.
Huey: Grandad, you said the word nigger 46 times yesterday. I counted.
Grandad: Nigger-hush.

Huey: Grandad, you can't tame the white supremicist power structure with cheese.
Grandad: Yes I can.

Huey: Grandad, you cannot force me to be someone I'm not.
Grandad: The hell I can't. You gonna go. And you're not gonna embarrass me in front of my new neighbor.
Riley: Why can't we be ourselves. Why can't I be me? Are you ashamed of me?
Grandad: VERY!

interesting note: The line "He looks like he jacks off with Icy-Hot." was not bleeped, the the very next line, "He looks like he jerks off with gerbils" was (the word jerks).

Give it a look-see.

-Ab

top

abused child

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

Philadelphia (PA) - A seven-year-old boy was at the center of a Philadelphia, PA courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with child custody law and regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge then suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried out that they also beat him.

After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him.

After two recesses to check legal references and confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the Philadelphia Eagles, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.

-Ab

(blatantly stolen off an IM from tonysee)

top

Open letter to President Bush

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

Dear President George W. Bush,

        As you may know, both the left and right are less than thrilled with your nomination of Ms. Harriet Miers to the Supreme Court. The conservative right do not believe she has the values they would like in a justice and the left are threatening to filibuster just because she is your nominee. In addition, much of the general public is concerned that she lacks the experience and qualification to be a Supreme Court Justice, or, even worse, is being nominated just because she is your friend.

        To help you in this matter, I have a suggestion of whom you can nominate that may be acceptable to everyone. The person I have in mind is familiar with all 3 branches of the government. She is a former trial lawyer in good standing with the A.B.A., a member of the Southern Baptist faith, and intimately familiar with both the legislative and executive branches of the government. Her political ambitions are many and they know no bounds.

        Yes, the best candidate for the Supreme Court you could put before the senate is Hillary Clinton. Not only is she religious, qualified, and not a crony; she is just what you need to replace Ms. Sandra Day O'Connor: female. Don't underestimate the value of nominating Mrs. Clinton. Not only will you receive praise for bridging the gap between the right and the left, but also you will do more for your party, the Republicans, than you could imagine. By putting Mrs. Clinton on the stand, you effectively eliminate the Democrats greatest hope for presidency in 2008, thereby all but guaranteeing the republicans at least another 4 years in the White House.

        In closing, please consider the compromise presented in this letter. It could save face and promote your party farther than the nomination of Ms. Harriet Miers ever could.

-Abmoraz

top

Lesson Learned

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  more than 8 years ago

So, I thought I learned my lesson with driving back from the bars after my actions almost a year ago, but aparently I was wrong. I also thought that .08 was the limit and if you were there or lower, you were fine, but aparently that is wrong as well.

Yesterday, I had to work from 10am till 6pm during one of the busiest weekends this year (Penn State vs. Minnesota football game). After work, I stuck around and watched the end of the game, which ended at about 6:50. From there, I drove home and took a nap till 10pm. Got up, took a shower and drove back into town to meet some friends at 11pm. There I had a can of Busch beer (it's what they had).

After that, I went to a bar (for those familiar with the area, the Lion's Den) to meet some other friends. This was about 11:45. At the bar, I had 2 rum and cokes. I left the bar at 1:45 and went back to the first place, picking up a 12-pack of Yuengling lager on the way.

When I got back there at 2am, I played 1 game of beer pong, where we won and I drank 1 beer. This took less than 10 minutes. My current tally was 4 drinks in roughly 3 hours. The rum and cokes were a little strong, so I was estimating 5 MAYBE 6 tops. At my weight, I figured I was right about .07-.08 so I then proceded to sit around and BS with my friends drinking water for another half hour just to make sure.

At 2:45, I got in my car to head to an after-hours party from work on the other end of town. I placed the 12-pack in my car (there were 6 left because I gave some away, but they were unopened). I drove to a convenience store on the way to get smokes (The Minute Mart on the corner of College and Atherton). From there, I was going to park in the west-campus lots because they are free and I could leave my car there overnight, as I had every intention of actually getting drunk at the party and had already claimed a couch at the place. The parking spots for the Minute Mart have access to Atherton to the east of the store, but the alley I wanted runs perpendicular and is blocked off by a fence to the north. I pulled out into the road and hung a "hard left" to get to the alley. Drove down the alley, turned right to head up into the parking spots where cop lights turned on behind me.

I pulled over, gave the officer my license , registration, and insurance. He informed me that the turn I made was illegal because I never entered the proper lanes of travel and that if I'da gone all the way across the street, THEN pulled a hard left to come back, it'd been OK. He shined the light in my car and saw the 12-pack and asked me where I was coming from and going. I told him. Then he asked if I had been drinking, I told him yes and repeated everything above**.

He asked me to get out of the car and began issuing a field sobriety test. I passed the light/eye test. I failed the walk a straight line test because 2 of the 18 steps were not heel to toe. He then asked if I had any health issues that prevented me from walking well or standing and I showed him the scars on my knee from my surgeries and the scars on the other from the near ganggrene I had.

At this point he decided that he should issue a field breathylizer on me. He informed me that I had the right to refuse and that the results were not admissable into court either way. I told him that, "I felt fine, but I will consent because if I am wrong, then I deserve to be removed from the road, even though I was coming right here, because I could've put myself or others in danger." I blew a .08.

He showed me the results and I said, "That is the limit, right?" He said, "yes." I replied, "well then I'm OK."

This is where I guess I was wrong with interperating the law. He said that anything between .05 and .08 is at the officer's discretion and that to verify it, he was going to take me to the hospital to have bloodwork done. I had the right to refuse, but if I did, I would be immediately arrested and lose my license for a minimum of 6 months. I consented and held my hands out to be cuffed.

At this point he laughed and said, "How big are you?" I replied, "6'04" and 320 pounds." He looked at me and said, "no way!" I replied with, "when we get to the hospital, we can weigh me if you like." He did a quick frisk, took my wallet, cell phone, and lighter, but left me with my gum, smokes, and blistex. I turned around to be cuffed again and he said, "I don't think that's necessary. I'm going to have a hard enough time fitting you in my car to begin with.

His back-up officer moved my car to the parking spot I was heading for originally, locked it up and gave my keys to the officer with me. We drove to the hospital
where they drew blood. The officer then said he would either "A. take me home or B. take me to the party." I was sitting in the back seat saying, are you telling me that you're going to drop me off, with my keys to go drink next door to where my car is after taking me all the way up here on the suspicion of drunk driving?"

He thought for a second and said, "Let's go home then."

Morals of the story:
      1. Never make an illegal left. Even if you've made that same left over 300 times before over the last 6 years.
      2. Laws are fuzzy.
      3. Don't push limits.

The officer told me that my speech, driving, and eyes were fine. I was by far the nicest and politest DUI stop he's ever encountered. He said that if the tests come back .08 or even .09, that he would probably opt to not press charges because I did not demonstrate any dangerous behavoir and seemed to attempt responsiblity as well as accepted my responsiblity in the matter, rather than trying to bargin, whine, or threaten my way out of it.

He will get the blood results on wednesday and call me. *crosses fingers*

-Ab

** I have always found that yelling, taking an attitude, or lying to the police is ALWAYS counterproductive. Just tell them the truth and bight the bullet if you are in the wrong.

top

things about me

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  about 9 years ago

Why not...

1. I'm 5 years younger and 50-70 pounds heavier than everyone thinks I am when meeting me in person.

2. I have never lost a chugging contest.

3. I dressed for 2 pro-hockey games (though, only got to actually play for 30 seconds in the second one).

4. I loving playing guitar, but only accoustic guitars.

5. I've never been out of the US.

6. I hate to travel in general.

7. I hate to fly, but I love to skydive.

8. I've moved 11 times in my life, but all 11 have been within 150 miles of each other. 3 times back to the same house.

9. What most people consider "good" beer, I hate (guiness, bass, blue moon, la fin du mon...) and what most people consider bad beer, I also hate. (anything carrying the Bud name, miller lite, natty, beast, Coors, schlitz,...)

10. I make money playing online poker.

11. I do like most amber beers, be they lagers, bachs, or ales.

12. I've been declared dead twice.

13. I have 2 joints in my body made of mostly nickel/titanium.

14. I put on my resume for my last job under "special skills" that "I can hit a softball REALLY REALLY far." (yes, I got the job)

15. In the last 3 years, I've put a total of 6,000 miles on my car. If I can finish fixing it up, I can apply for "classic" plates in january.

16. I have an overactive immune system that can often incapacitate me in the form of allergies, bursitus, excema, and dehydration.

17. I do not drink coffee or tea. In fact, I try to avoid caffeine in all forms (though, I do occasionally enjoy a coke or cherry coke).

18. I hold all stupid people in high contempt (yes, that includes myself at times)

19. I am staunchly libertarian. I believe that people are allowed to be assholes, stupid, or otherwise non-social without any repercussions from the government, but at the same time, they should be in no way rewarded with gov't support or monies beyond what they've personally paid in taxes, especially disaster relief or social welfare.

20. I'm currently being sought after by 3 debt collectors because I refuse to pay doctor's bills if they got the diagnosis (and therefore treatment) wrong. I will pay if they correct themselves, but if I have to go to another doctor because the situation got worse, then no money for you ... ESPECIALLY if it's a reasonably common problem or ailment that they should've gotten right. The bills are for $26, $75, and $230 respectively.

21. bonus factoid: I hold language in contempt. Especially english. More so grammar/spelling nazis. If people didn't make their own little changes, then we'd all still be speaking ould english with the "thee's", "thou's", "thine's", "ere's", and non-phonetic spellings than anyone could care to cry about. For anyone that doesn't think it'd be that bad, try reading "Canterbury Tales" in their original middle english. Olde english is barely related to that because of the evolution of the language to suit the people rather than the elite.

22. Bonus factoid #2: I never preview or proofread. I find it dishonest and it denies the original writing (but not so much the intent).

-Ab

top

My feelings on Katrina

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  about 9 years ago

(and the southern coasts in general)

MOVE!

My donation to Katrina Relief Fund is a giant map of the United States with a GIANT FRICKIN' ARROW pointing north.

Guess what? Tennessee doesn't get hurricanes. Move there! Neither does Kentucky, Illinois, West Virginia, Indiana or Pennsylvania. By the time the storms get to those states, they are just long thunderstorms. Hell the worst most of those states see is an occasional drought, a rare tornado, and rarely a blizzard.

But Abm0raz, the weather's so nice here! It's nice 360 days out of the year, if you like that "sunny and warm" crap (I personally don't), but 5 days out of the year, your house blows down, you lose everything you own, 10% of your neighbors die, and your whole world goes to hell. But that's a reasonable price to pay for great weather, right?

So, with that in mind, I will put my money where my mouth is. I will donate to a charity who's sole purpose is to move people from Hurricane Alley (FL and anybody in coastal GA, AL, MS, LA, TX, SC, or NC) north to a safer area. Otherwise, I will continue to donate my crudely hand drawn map with the giant red arrow.

-Ab

ps. Yeah, I know it's rough, but you can't tell me for a moment that people who live in a BOWL-SHAPED city on the coast that is BELOW SEA LEVEL didn't see that this could have been a very real possibility?

pps. For those that think I'm a hypocrite, I broke off my engagement several years back because I did not want to move to Florida with her. I don't want to deal with the weather. (fun fact: Florida has more hurricane, lightning AND tornado damage (each seperately) than any other state in the union.)

ppps. True to my word, anyone from that area that needs a place to stay, I can house 1-2 people. They just gotta get here. Hit me up at abmoraz at gmail dot com.

pppps. Feel free to comment. Everyone's entitled to their opinion. If you disagree with me, I can handle that.

top

drunken journal entry

Abm0raz Abm0raz writes  |  about 9 years ago

Show us your tits!

no, really.

So, I was stuck downtown tonight after deciding to let my roommates go home without me. 7hours later (at 6am) I found myself stumbling down the main road (West College Avenue, for those that are familiar). I see a familiar vehicle slow down while passing me then speed up and turn onto Barnard street. I call my buddy Paul and he answers:

Me: Paul, did you just drive down college Ave?
Paul: yeah.
Me: think you could do an old drunk** a favor and do another lap around the block and take me home?
Paul: sure.

So ... instead of walking across town west to east) to get my keys the walking across town again (south to WAAAAY more south), I got a ride and all is good in the land of me. For all those female types that were thinking that I might make a good father, know that my first born (and possibly my second) will now be named "Paul".

All is even better since I have come leftover vegetable stew (see earlier journal) to munch on.

-Ab

** as for me being an old drunk, Paul is almost 10 years older than me. 10 years minus 3 weeks. I was born in mid january, he was born in late december 9 calander years earlier. I can still whomp his ass at golf though ... and drink his pathetic liver under the table.

Slashdot Login

Need an Account?

Forgot your password?

Submission Text Formatting Tips

We support a small subset of HTML, namely these tags:

  • b
  • i
  • p
  • br
  • a
  • ol
  • ul
  • li
  • dl
  • dt
  • dd
  • em
  • strong
  • tt
  • blockquote
  • div
  • quote
  • ecode

"ecode" can be used for code snippets, for example:

<ecode>    while(1) { do_something(); } </ecode>