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Banker Offers $1M To Solve Beal Conjecture

Captain Spam Re:What's in it for him? (216 comments)

So, being quite cynical about such things, in what way would a proof of this conjecture allow him to make more money?

Philanthropy and advancing science are good, but my first thoughts is that if someone can prove this he stands to make massive amounts of money.

You know the old jokes about rich people paying bums on the street to fight for their own amusement? Well, extend that to mathematicians.

about a year and a half ago

A Serious Proposal To Fix Windows 8

Captain Spam Re:My solution for fixing Windows 8 (578 comments)

Sigh I miss the days when AOL gave a free Floppy Disk every day on your doorstep. That way you just take it Re-Format it and you have extra storage. When they went to CD's it was a sad day for me. They could have at least made them on CD-R so I can burn a new partition on it to store stuff.

I tried that theory, too, but after a while it became clear that either AOL used low-quality crappy floppies or the USPS didn't care much about them in transit (or both), given I kept getting bad sectors out of them when I reformatted them.

about a year and a half ago

Most precise measuring tool I've used ...

Captain Spam Breadcrumb trail (328 comments)

That's the problem with polls like this. I want to assume the attobreadcrumb is the joke option, but I can't help but think someone's going to come along and explain how it's used as a real-life but horribly obscure discrete unit of measurement.

about a year and a half ago

In terms of general neatness, I am ...

Captain Spam Re:Free Advice (181 comments)

a friend of mine had a car in his driveway .

Can someone randomly tow something _from your driveway_? Street I can see...besides, here things on the street have to be insured.

There's the part in the story where the neighbor impersonated the rightful owner to call a municipal towing service to his house to haul the temporarily-gutted VW Bug away. That is, under normal circumstances, yes, you CAN call a service to tow something from your driveway (say, if the vehicle was otherwise unmovable but you wanted to be rid of it), but this asshole neighbor went ahead with straight-up fraud to get someone else's property towed.

about a year and a half ago

Compared to its non-Super version, I most prefer ...

Captain Spam Super 8 Motel (288 comments)

It might seem like a cheap, cheesy hotel chain nowadays, but you REALLY didn't want to stay at just an 8 Motel.

about a year and a half ago

Giant Snails Invade Florida

Captain Spam Re:He's gaining on me! (245 comments)

I was picturing a 1950s-era monster movie poster or trailer, myself.

"Coming this fall to a theater near YOU! They're terrible... they're horrible... they're GASTROPODS!"
"Oh no! The snails have just taken Fort Lauderdale! Hurry! We've only got a few months to evacuate before they eventually get to Miami! The airport will be moderately more busy!"
"Giant snails are invading Florida! Where did they come from? What do they want? How many more will eventually perish in the lethargic onslaught, given enough time? Find out this fall in... DAY OF THE SNAIL!"

about 2 years ago

Judge Slams Apple-Motorola Suit As 'Business Strategy'

Captain Spam Yes, they know (140 comments)

Claiming the parties' were engaged in 'obstreperous and cantankerous conduct', he said that the lawsuit was part of 'a business strategy that appears to have no end.'

Motorola lawyer: Yeah.
Apple lawyer: And?
Judge: *long pause* *deep sigh* Very well. *gets up, starts walking towards lawyers* I believe, at this point, I am legally permitted, by the great State of Florida, to dope-slap the both of you. Not only am I permitted to do so, I may be legally required as well, something I am not about to question. Please turn around.

about 2 years ago

Windfarm Sickness Spreads By Word of Mouth

Captain Spam The giants (482 comments)

"Windfarm Sickness"? Lame.

"Don Quixote Syndrome"? Much better.

about 2 years ago

Scientists Grow Replacement Human Teeth In Mouse Kidneys

Captain Spam Because why not? (117 comments)

Human teeth from mouse kidneys. Because why the hell not? Next week, we'll start on our project to make alligator spleens from parrot intestines. Time permitting, there's always the cheetah-bones-from-elephant-skin plan or the one where we make dog fur from jellyfish stingers. If we get enough funding, we might be able to complete our magnum opus, recreating the heart of a triceratops from the colon of a neanderthal!

about 2 years ago

Namco Is Planning Adult Versions of Classic Arcades

Captain Spam Already been done (1 comments)

The rapid tumble of American arcades — the real arcades, the loud dark rooms with gross carpets and no parents — has left a hole where a piece of culture used to be. Rather than try and recreate that vintage arcade experience, Japanese video game maker Namco is rolling out a "restaurant-centered, destination entertainment concept."

So... they're "inventing" Dave & Buster's or Gameworks. That... is less than thrilling than what the headline led me to believe. Or than what the first paragraph's nostalgia trip prepared me for.

about 2 years ago

My favorite resolution for the new year:

Captain Spam WUXGA (266 comments)

Okay, I know 1920x1200 8:5 (16:10) displays "lost" once everyone was tricked into drooling over "HD picture size zomg!", but damnit, I really don't feel right buying a NEW, supposedly top-of-the-line monitor that has worse resolution than my laptop from eight or so years ago in college. Sadly, my choices are dwindling...

about 2 years ago

Troubling trend for open source company...

Captain Spam Re:Douglas Adams figured it out (3 comments)

We need a B-Ark.

So... we need to send the morons out to continue our species as the rest of us horribly die out due to them doing some minor task that we don't realize is vital to our survival?

more than 2 years ago

Wii U's day-one update is capable of incapacitating machines.

Captain Spam Re:Following instructions. (11 comments)

I have to wonder when the user's powering it off during this process. If it's being bricked when powered off during the download phase (before the firmware gets flashed), then it's a point of concern, since it should be stuffing that data into a holding area before it does a single thing with it.

However, if it's during the flashing phase, well, then that's the user's stupid fault. They DO throw warnings all over the place. But, knowing Nintendo, there's a nonzero chance that the download/update screen are one in the same and you get no indication which it's doing at a given moment. I mean, this IS a company that, last I knew, still didn't understand the basic OS concept of hardware abstraction...

more than 2 years ago

USPTO Head: Current Patent Litigation Is 'Reasonable'

Captain Spam Breakneck indeed! (153 comments)

He then went on to proclaim the 'absolutely breakneck pace' of innovation in the smartphone industry [...]

In that each smartphone manufacturer is using the patent system in new and innovative ways as a legal bludgeon to break each other's necks, right?

more than 2 years ago

Ask Slashdot: What video games keep you from using Linux?

Captain Spam Reverse the question (7 comments)

None for me. Linux is my default desktop OS of choice, and most of the non-console, non-portable games I play either run on Linux or are platform-agnostic (i.e. web-based games). For the rest, I use a Windows partition, but since shutting down everything and rebooting to Windows is a hassle, I tend to not play those as often.

Of course, the real question for me is "what games are keeping that Windows partition on your computer?". And for THAT, the answer comes down to "not many, the majority of which will be settled once Steam for Linux is finalized".

more than 2 years ago

Best Trek Captain?

Captain Spam Why not? (618 comments)

I voted for Pike. I felt there was sufficient reason given in the poll choice itself.

more than 2 years ago

Google Chrome's Advanced Settings are a Threat to the Universe

Captain Spam Advanced Settings (2 comments)

That's why they're advanced settings. Duh.

more than 2 years ago

Ask Slashdot: What Distros Have You Used, In What Order?

Captain Spam A confusing evolution (867 comments)

For me, it went something like:

Red Hat* -> Slackware -> FreeBSD** -> Gentoo + Kubuntu

*: Before RHEL existed.
**: Okay, fine, that's not Linux, but that's still what replaced Slack on that particular box.

My current server and desktop are both Gentoo, while my laptop is Kubuntu (hence the +). No, there's no particular logical progression, really. Each just looked neat as I came across them.

more than 2 years ago

Re: the recent U.S. party conventions ...

Captain Spam PARTY! (342 comments)

Wooooo! Yeah, bro, I'll totally be at the party! What's the party about, bro? It's... oh.

more than 2 years ago


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