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Comments

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Not with a bang, but a whimper...

RM6f9 I know some of what you mean... (29 comments)

I used to work in tech, and "teh dot" was an "in" group I could be part of - some of my friends here have been more real, more supportive, than some of my meat-space "friends", during one of the roughest times of my life. I still ghost, still read others' JEs and (oh, so rarely) post occasionally myself, but, yeah: it feels like Elvis has left the building.
Me, I spend the majority of my time on Facebook these days...

more than 2 years ago
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POLL: Were you happier before you started working in I.T.?

RM6f9 Missing Option: (12 comments)

[X] Not necessarily happier *before*, but ECSTATIC *after*.

Yes, helping people really does feel that much better.

about 3 years ago
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Freedom's just another word ....

RM6f9 Sorry (14 comments)

I have no way of knowing exactly how bad this is to you, but am sad that you will not be able to do what you enjoy in the ways you enjoy it.
I do know that as long as you are capable of inviting friends over, pushing "Mix" on a blender and pushing "play" on a dvd player, there is a potential alternative income stream awaiting you...

more than 3 years ago
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A disturbing trend ...

RM6f9 Re:Interesting . . . (6 comments)

Because they're minimums, not maximums: If, as an employer, I advertise seeking 2 years of experience, that in no way excludes my willingness to hire someone with 10 or more, and if they're willing to work for what I'm willing to pay, that's free-market capitalism.
Please note that the above does not necessarily make me a *wise* capitalist, one of whom might understand that they *need* a 10-yr plus experienced person for certain portions of a position's responsibilities, b-u-t, until they feel the pain of their short-sighted penny-wise pound-foolish practices, it's gonna continue.
An honest curiosity (because I'm not a coder): How *does* one distinguish themselves as a quality coder, far above and beyond the 1-year code monkeys, to a non-coding semi-tech-literate hiring manager? Further, having done that, how does one demonstrate the need for quality vs. a batch of monkeys?

more than 3 years ago
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This will be the Randy Savage Memorial thread, then.

RM6f9 80s "Wrasslers" (6 comments)

Grew up near where Piper did, truly enjoyed most of the 80s stars - Randy was a more entertaining talker, but for absolute awesomeness, Sid Justice and Ultimate Warrior were the guys...

more than 3 years ago
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What to tell those true believers "post-rapture"

RM6f9 Yeah, I went... (4 comments)

...but I've had better trips on acid and mushrooms, no big deal.

more than 3 years ago
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Reflections upon writing a letter of recommendation

RM6f9 Re:Sounds difficult (5 comments)

While you're looking, you'll still need to fuel/feed yourself... There are *thousands of people taking advantage of "the economy" as an excellent time to combine their nutrition budget with building an additional income...

more than 3 years ago
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Reflections upon writing a letter of recommendation

RM6f9 Sounds difficult (5 comments)

Do you code for the same reason writers write? (Because it's in you and *must* be expressed?) - or do you code because it's the only thing you know how to do / are comfortable doing?
If the former, sounds like moving time, although there are no guarantees of the grass being cleaner on any other sides of the fences...
If the latter, is it time to build plan B yet? One where you know your boss has integrity & will treat with you fairly, because you see her in the mirror every morning?
Or, were you just musing to yourself out loud, describing the situation that your reasons won't let you change nor leave?

more than 3 years ago
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Been awhile (ramble warning)

RM6f9 Re:Because it's the future (4 comments)

Actually, I don't know the routine - I've always done the next thing either to escape the previous thing, or because somebody else expected it of me - now, I have a blank palette, a few things I want to do, but, within my own sense of what's moral and responsible, so many options it's scary. Thanks for the feedback!

more than 3 years ago
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Happy birthday John Muir!

RM6f9 Welcome back - ? (5 comments)

Been awhile since I've seen any posts fm you - of course, it's been awhile since I wrote in my journal too - ty for the reminder!

more than 3 years ago
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World's Most Powerful Rocket Ready In 2012, SpaceX Says

RM6f9 Re:Leave it Fox.. (251 comments)

Rocket may be ready well in advance of available launch schedule dates/permits/etc..., - ?

more than 3 years ago
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575-pound Heart Attack Grill spokesman, 29, dead.

RM6f9 Re:Sad, really (13 comments)

8,000??? Let's see, that'd be ... 40 shakes/meals!

more than 3 years ago
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575-pound Heart Attack Grill spokesman, 29, dead.

RM6f9 Sad, really (13 comments)

He could have been eating *healthy* for free, experiencing weight *loss*, *decrease* of wardrobe sizes, *less* weight-related pain... It's sometimes hard, to remember that I'm just a messenger, and folks have got to want to help themselves...

more than 3 years ago
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Stupid (former) boss trix: Filing off the GPL notices

RM6f9 Re:I see a pattern emerging with you (18 comments)

So, she's a crusader. Finding things and people that don't fit her (or the laws' she lives with) ideas of what's Right, and doing what she can to fix them, by bringing them to public and legal scrutiny. While one can see where those with guilty consciences might prefer she were less intensely thorough about her actions, and some of us would like to see her bring a healthier approach by way of taking better care of herself and focusing more on leading by positive example than so actively resisting these perceived-as-negative examples, in the end, it is her choice whether to crusade, her choice of how to crusade, and her choice which crusades she takes on.
As one who has taken on a health crusade as my life's purpose and legacy to my fallen angel, I can definitely relate to Having A Purpose and working on Making Things Better. While monetary gains are nice in a life where money is better to have than not, such concerns are secondary to the ideas of seeing that those who are violating the laws and/or treating people badly be brought to justice (in Barb's case), and that those committed to improving their health and wealth have access to the best, simplest easiest body-fuel available (in my case)
For my part, I will suggest Barb take better care of herself so that she may continue to fight more of the good fights, and fight them better - otherwise, a simple "Excelsior!" for her courage, and gratitude that there are more who choose to live life fully standing up for their principles, rather than merely existing, drifting from one expediency to the next and sniping from the sidelines as anonymous cowards...

more than 3 years ago
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Who owns the code?

RM6f9 Lawsuit (31 comments)

Fraud, fraud by check, hostile work environment, physical and emotional damages - the customer is an unfortunate victim of your former bosses' actions, but you've stated it: As you've not been paid for it, they have no right to it. Possession of stolen property is about as close as I can define it.
Glad you're finally going into business for yourself, although I like mine better: I never have to worry about (literal!) bleeding eyeballs. ;-)

more than 3 years ago
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Missed deadlines coming up! Or I go blind. Pick one ...

RM6f9 An apropos quote (6 comments)

A (fictional, doesn't keep him from being right) Vulcan friend of mine used to say "There are always... possibilities."
My question, what's it going to take before you realize that your best boss and your best employee are the same person you see in the mirror every morning?

more than 3 years ago
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The start of '11

RM6f9 Re:TY (14 comments)

Thank you, you too...

more than 3 years ago
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The start of '11

RM6f9 TY (14 comments)

TY 4 the reminder!

more than 3 years ago
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A whole year

RM6f9 Re:Good advice. (5 comments)

Thank you. It does help. "Tha Intarweb" may be a fiction "made of tubes", but the connections are most definitely real.

more than 3 years ago

Submissions

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RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 7 years ago

RM6f9 writes "How would one go about responsibly soliciting funding for a gameshow idea (development or outright sale)? Method of delivery would ideally be webcast, qualifications of originator minimal/none outside of "has enjoyed game shows and believes the idea would be a winner""

Journals

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Been awhile (ramble warning)

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 3 years ago

Too many changes in too short a time can erode one's motivation: I recently had to have Gracie, the 84-lb tri-color ruff collie who shared my angel's last ten years, put to sleep (arthritis, constant pain, no more suffering) - Selling a majority of my stuff, most of which I knew were foolish purchases when I made them - rather like a temporary drug habit, I guess - preparatory to selling my house - debt-free will be a good thing when it happens, as the mortgage is the last debt.
The business I'm in: While I'm not enjoying the spectacular results some others are, it is rewarding enough to keep me going, both in terms of personal health and finances, so that's a positive...
It's odd, really - having one's future as an almost completely blank page, you'd think it'd be a sense of joy, of freedom - so why do I feel so scared?

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A whole year

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 3 years ago

A whole year has passed since my angel was here. Sometimes it feels like forever ago, other times like just yesterday. Actively love those whom you love while they're around to be loved - none of us is guaranteed a tomorrow.

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Again!

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  about 4 years ago

Not bragging, more just astounded - I'm severely tempted to be petty and slap induhviduals who've crapped in my Journal, but I'm going to avoid that since the ones who'd be affected were the ones brave enough to at least log in...

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Friend Reason: Capt. Splendid

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  about 4 years ago

Reciprocation: I've been befriended by Captain Splendid!

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SHHH! You'l sacre 'em off...

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  about 4 years ago

See that little group over there? 15 Mod Points, all mine. You've been nice to me, come help me spend them...

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Ask a Subset (hardware)

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  about 4 years ago

Need a solid, reasonably priced all-in-one (scanner, copier, fax, printer) - my HP 6110 is finally biting the big non-functional, and is sentenced to an "Office Space" fare-thee-fucked. All recommendations gratefully appreciated.

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Friend reason: bmetzler

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

Reciprocation - although I find myself wondering what I might've done to warrant the attention much less friendship of such a vaunted low UID...

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Still around...

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

Kinda stumbling along, trying to celebrate the small successes... Weird, sometimes it feels like she's just out for an extended weekend - other times, missing her leaves no room to feel anything else. Enjoy your loved ones while they're here...

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Facebook crossover

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

From the "Advocates for Self-Government" Group:
""The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools."
Herbert Spencer 1820-1903

On the one hand, well, D'UH!, but on the other - WAKE UP!!!

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Irony toward the next generation

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

Irony, face the future: Absolutely zero government influence/regulation applies to conceiving a child - one only needs certain organs functional and certain conditions extant within them - Attempt to assist with rearing a child when one isn't part of the conception team, and, all-of-a-sudden, WHOOSH! Governmental paperwork adding up to at least an acre of former rainforest, red-tape, not less than 4 different sets of bureaucrats - they *claim* it's all "for the best interest of the child" - that being the case, why do so many severe child abuse and death by abuse cases come out of the foster system? I'm qualified to raise kids - one son and two step-sons, all productive members of society, my input did not turn them into sociopathic felons, so: I'm imagining somewhere within that foster parent system, there is a child who wants nothing more than to know they're worth the effort to get past all that and help them negotiate the remainder of their childhood safely.

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No more suffering

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

She's gone. Peacefully, in her sleep, she left. She's beyond all pain and suffering, regardless of exactly what state of existence her energy might find itself in.

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Further update

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

My angel is still in hospital, still in holding pattern - done with radiation, she can have no more - lymphedema in both legs, sitting up on the edge of the bed is the major accomplishment of the day, standing, let alone walking, COMPLETELY out of the picture for the immediate future - kidney and liver numbers not getting worse, not getting better, transfusions every couple of days - she is so much braver than I imagine myself to be - were I faced with all of this, I'd be heading for the exit...
More as it develops.

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"The Lost Symbol"

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

Mr. Brown has written a worthy successor to "The Da Vinci Code" and "Angels & Demons": Once again, Professor Langdon is the only one who can save the world from those who've manipulated symbols, this time heavily involving the Masons and the Institute for Noetic Science - the scary parts revolve around the idea that, although improbable, these events do not feel entirely impossible - the twists and turns pull the reader right along, and the research leaves the reader several leads to follow up on.
(Side note: The Masons and Sir Isaac Newton both consider(ed) 33 a most significant number - read the book to learn more about their reasons)
9.5 out of 10, mostly due to feeling rushed past some interesting stuff in the interest of book length and/or pacing issues - I read the thing in a single night.

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update

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

Wife is in hospital, where she's been most of the previous month: what they thought was a micro-bleed deep in her leg was/is a mass - there are others, 2 on her liver, one in a private place, others...
Can't do more chemo (they had planned 1 per week, started last Thursday) until liver function evens out - Kermit's song notwithstanding, if you contract jaundice, some of you turns green.
She's getting the leg mass radiated daily weekdays, still weaker than a newborn kitten...
ON THE PLUS SIDE: her mind is MUCH clearer, they seem to have resolved the blood calcium/electrolytes/bladder infection/medication issues that made her somewhat paranoid and extremely disoriented - mentally, she's ~85%
When you feel like you're hitting the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on...

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Small celebration, guarded optimism

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

After 2 weeks between hospital and skilled nursing facility, she's coming home tomorrow - new rails and seat for her tub, walker and wheelchair, the dread blue parking placard, right leg twice the size and 1/4 - 1/10 the strength of the left and on enough morphine and oxycodone to keep me comatose, but:

She's coming home tomorrow.

Hell, later today as of now.

Once she's home, we'll both sleep better (translated - I'll be able to sleep instead of just pass out for 4-5 hours per night), hopefully the leg will improve faster here at home and she'll be able to get up and out and back into her (and our) regularly-scheduled life.

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Heavy sigh

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

Update, doing my best not to rant or whine, just the facts and a couple opinions.

          She's had unilateral lymphoedema in her rt. leg for a couple months - started with a swollen foot, now it's reached her thigh, it changed her gait about 2 months ago, which brought pain to the knee (patello-femoral pain syndrome - long term meaning "knee ouch"), pain which has since worsened to the point that it's multiple percocet by day, morphine (still oral, yay for small favors) at night.

          She recently had her bilateral j-stents replaced, her kidneys came back into normal range, then they gave her an IV-contrast CT scan - bring out the buckets, her system HATES that contrast. We got the preliminary results by phone yesterday: "irregularities" in her pelvis, liver and chest - all lymph nodes scanned are enlarged.

          If it weren't for the knee, she'd be *feeling* okay - no gross symptoms yet.

          She's been fighting this crap off and on (mostly on) for 6 and a half years.

          Her oncologist has her on a trial of Faslodex (fulvestrant), hoping to see her OCA count come down and everything else shrink back to healthy.

          If I can bring any good at all out of this it's the following:

          Ladies, demand that your Dr. add the OCA-125 test to your blood tests at exam time - it's how we discovered her disease so early - men, do the same on behalf of the ladies you care about.

          Cancer *can* be fought - make sure any health-care providers are on the same page as far as attitude, or change them until the ones you have are (we went through 3, all *very* intelligent clinicians/ all more interested in statistics than bedside manner).

          Nobody guarantees us more than today. We joke about
          "What would you do if an earth-killing meteor was detected, and you only had x minutes?"
          "Probably try for one last bout of wild-monkey love - of course, my luck, the meteor would skip off the atmosphere, and I'd go to jail for lewd public behavior..."

Some of us, when we say "for better or for worse", truly mean it.

Tomorrow marks the 14th anniversary of our wedding.

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Asking a super-small subset (farmers +)

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

What is the best crop to grow specifically for vegetable oil, looking for yield per acre? Soybeans, sunflowers, peanuts,...?

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Further update

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  more than 4 years ago

We've had a conversation with her oncologist, a *very* good Dr., awesome combination of clinical education and bedside manner - he's including us in the plan to the extents allowed by law and sense - trouble is, the treatment option cupboard is looking mighty bare, we're down to one. last. option.
No suspense, if there is only one straw, we're gonna clutch at it, maybe build a house out of it and stand guard against wolves with a shotgun.

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Angel update (calmer me)

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  about 5 years ago

Well, I've calmed down some: after a visit to an ER on the 9th, resulting in the discovery of 3 clots around her lungs, an overnight hospital stay, and a massive/rapidly-applied course of blood thinners, we brought her home - 4 days of sub-cutaneous levidox (sp?) injections left bruises that would've had her in a shelter and me in jail had anyone seen them w/o the real explanation.
Fast forward to Monday last (7/20), when she went in for a routine day-surgery, the replacement (bilateral) of her ureteral double-ended "J" stents - the actual procedure went perfectly smoothly, but when they tried to bring her out of anesthesia, her blood O2 wouldn't stabilize, so they put her back under, re-entubed her, and left her sedated for 19 hours until they could get a lung specialist and some tests back - they stopped the oxygen, but left the tube in for an hour, then removed the trach tube and put her on a nasal oxygen feed, then removed that all the while very carefully watching her O2 levels...
Badness: when my mother passed, before my out-of state family could get in to say good-bye, she spent 4 days on life support - machine breathing for her by way of a trach-tube, tongue relaxed, tip protruding slightly - fast-forward to Mon night, when that was almost exactly the same picture/sight I had of my wife, before they told me I probably shouldn't wake her due to the tube...
Terror comes in many forms, I might've slept 2 nightmare hours Mon. night.
We jumped through all the hoops they set up to get her released, we've been home since Tuesday (yesterday) afternoon, now all we've got left is a CT scan (Friday, if her kidneys are up to the IV contrast) and a visit with her oncologist on Tuesday next to discuss new treatment options - the oral she is on was, they think, what caused the clots.
So, how's everyone *else's* month gone?

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Fire my writer! (warning: hateful/self-pitying rant)

RM6f9 RM6f9 writes  |  about 5 years ago

Okay, so, life is scripted, by some invisible infinite all-knowing cruel RAT BASTARD. My wife has been holding endometrial cancer at bay for the last year by means of Megesterol (sp?): a medication that simultaneously blocks estrogen uptake, increases appetite (since countered by Paxil, but not until she'd added 50 pounds to an already-overweight frame), and *may* (they told us in the fine print) cause blood clots. After an episode of sever shortness of breath on Wednesday last, we went to her Dr. on Thursday - they tested her O2 while walking 100 feet, then told us we were going to the local ER for immediate tests - sure enough, 3 clots in her lungs. Anybody ever try to sleep in a hospital waiting room chair? Next to a spouse in critical condition?
Small favors, they were able to get her onto a self-injectable blood thinner along with a coumadin regimen, so we can treat her at home.
How she copes? A truly devoted, but alas all-too-human, husband as coach - where do I go when *I* need coaching? Certainly *not* church, as I've seen what happens to those their god loves - thrown out of gardens for eating fruit, surrendered to Satan to be tested as a reward for being most faithful servant, hung on a cross to die by way of a father's love for his son...
Not co-workers - they have trouble coping with such mundanities as getting hours cut or which responsibilities are whose...
We're all gonna die - What happens after, who knows. Can anybody, anybody at all, tell me what kind of infinite moron, with the power to cause all of this to be, create such a fucking mess so that (supposedly his favorite) creations had no hope of using the one gift he gave them (logical thought) to understand anything like rules? Some kind of feedback system that actually worked, where jerks like me get our comeuppances and angels like her do NOT suffer BULLSHIT like what she's going through?
I'll be lucky to have her another year - probably less, the way things look right now - the chemotherapies they've tried don't work, and to boot, any treatments she's had before, chemo or radiation, would cause such further damage to whatever organs they affect that they're inadvisable.
I am residing in a body that stands 6 foot 9 inches tall and weighs 305 pounds - I have an IQ that measures well above 140 - I am not awesomely fit nor strong, but strong enough for my size - I have read most major religions' core teachings, and in the face of a microscopic invader in my wife's body I. am. powerless?
You, you infinite creator/director/producer/scriptwriter/ROTTEN PIECE OF SHIT, if you exist at all, you're FIRED!!!
Burn yourself in the hells you've supposedly created, unless you give my wife back her health. right the FUCK now.
How pathetic am I? I got nowhere else to go.

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